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SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA; 


OB, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,   AND    YACHTING: 


A  COLLECTION  OF  NAUTICAL  YARNS.' 


FROM  THE  LOO-BOOK  OF 


A   YOUNGSTER  OP  THE  MESS. 


NEW  YORK: 
NGER   &    TOWNSEND, 

222     BROADWAY, 

1854. 


Entered  according  to  Act  of  Congress,  in  the  year  1854, 

BY    STRINGER  &  TOWNSEND, 

In  the  Clerk's  Office  of  the  District  Court  of  the  United  States  for  the 
Southern  District  of  New  York. 


PREFACE. 


TN  presenting  the  present  Volume  to  the 
-L  reading  public,  we  have  thought  that  a  word 
or  two  of  preface  would  not  be  out  of  place. 
We  have  always  believed  that  all  that  was 
necessary  to  make  a  Volume  of  Nautical  Tales 
popular  and  acceptable,  was  to  get  it  up  in 
a  good  shape,  and  place  it  properly  before 
the  world. 

The  ocean  is  a  vast  store-house,  from  which 
Literature  can  extract  as  many  valuables  as 
Commerce.  Sea  life  abounds  so  greatly  in 
incidents,  that  nautical  tales  ever  possess  a 
freshness  that  no  other  species  of  composi- 
tion can  possibly  lay  claim  to.  In  the  course 
of  a  single  year,  a  maritime  officer  will  pass 
over  a  large  portion  of  the  world.  He  starts 
from  New  York  or  London,  and  in  a  few 
days  he  finds  himself  surrounded  by  the  aroma 
of  the  tropics.  Leaving  the  tropics,  he  passes 
down  to  Cape  Horn — visits  the  Indian  Ocean — 
looks  in  upon  the  Chinese — and  the  next 
month,  perhaps,  directs  his  prow  towards  the 
Arctic  Ocean,  Russian  America,  and  the  dan- 
gers and  excitements  of  Behering's  Straits  and 


iv  PREFACE. 

Hudson's  Bay.  At  all  these  places  he  supplies 
himself  with  new  ideas,  sees  mankind  under  a 
new  aspect,  and  enriches  his  common-place 
book  with  a  thousand  facts  and  fancies,  of 
whose  existence  the  man  of  conservative  habits 
has  no  possible  idea. 

The  articles  which  make  up  this  volume 
have  been  selected,  with  great  care,  from  the 
writings  of  some  of  the  best  authors  of  the  age ; 
they  are  of  all  possible  temperaments,  from  the 
rollicking  adventures  of  Forbessy  to  the  daring 
excitements  of  a  Guineaman. 

Should  the  volume  of  which  we  are  now 
speaking  meet  with  that  success  which  it  so 
justly  deserves,  we  shall  follow  it  up  with 
others  on  the  same  -subject — the  whole  forming 
a  Nautical  Library  superior  to  any  yet  pub- 
lished in  America. 


CONTENTS. 


PAGB 

CBUISE  OF  A  GUINEAMAN,       .       i       .        .     ^       .       ..  7 

FITZ-GUBIN ;  OR,  THE  ADMIRAL'S  PET,         .                .  47 

HOMEWARD  BOUND,   .        .       »       .  -     .     r«    .    .  •  -\       *  261 

AQUATIC  EXPEDITION  FROM  GIBRATAR  TO  BARCELONA,  283 

MR.  SNIGSBY'S  YACHT,  -,.       .       .       .        .,    ;,       ^       .  316 

THE  DEATH  SHOT— A  TALE  OF  THE  COAST  GUARD,        .  414 


CRUISE  OF  A  GTJINEAMAN, 


MIDSHIPMAN'S    LOG. 


BY    JOHN  W.  GOULD, ESQ. 


CHAPTER    I. 

JACK  GARNET/'  quoth  Tom  Seymour,  as  we  stood 
upon  Pier  No.  1,  North  River,  one  afternoon  in  July, 
18 — ,  "  do  you  see  my  brig,  yonder  ?  She  is  a  sweet  craft — 
carries  twenty  long-eighteens,  and  a  long  forty-two,  besides 
two  twenty-four  pound  carronades  on  the  poop,  and  two  on 
the  forecastle  ;  two  hundred  men,  who  are  stationed  and 
quartered  as  in  men-of-war ;  three  officers,  whom  I  call,  for 
fun's  sake,  second  and  third  lieutenants,  and  master ;  and 
half-a-dozen  boys  for  reefers.  Now  I  want  a  first  lieutenant, 
and  you  are  the  very  fellow.  Ship  with  me,  and  we'll  run 
down  to  the  Trades  in  ten  days,  and  then — whew  !  Go 
away,  salt  water  I  She  is  a  Baltimore  clipper,  sails  like  the 
devil,  and  will  put  the  wind's  eye  out  on  a  bowline.  Give 
her  one  point  free,  and  she's  off  like  a  shot.  Will  you 
got* 

"Thank  you,"  I  replied,  "I  am  somewhat  ticklish  about 
the  neck.  I  would  rather  be  hung  round  the  waist.  You 
are  too  strong  to  be  honest  ;  and  when  you  are  on  blue 
water,  you  will  make  some  mistake  on  the  subject  of  pro- 


AT   SEA;    OK, 

perty  ;  and  then  the  first  man-of-war  you  fall  in  with,  will 
string  you  all  up  at  her  yard-arm,  and  that's  an  elevation 
for  which  I  am  in  no  wise  ambitious.  I  would  rather  die  in 
my  bed  when  the  time  comes." 

"  Well,"  replied  Tom,  "  I  am  sorry  you  are  so  particular 
about  your  cravats  :  but  will  you  go  on  board  and  take  a 
look  at  her  ?  I  hove-short  this  morning,  and  shall  trip  my 
anchor  in  half  an  hour  and  go  to  sea.  Come,  I'll  leave  you 
at  quarantine." 

We  jumped  into  his  boat,  (a  twelve-oared  cutter,)  and 
pulled  for  the  brig.  As  we  neared  it  a  boatswain's  call 
"  piped  the  side;"  four  side-boys  manned  the  gangway  as 
we  passed  over,  and  we  were  received  upon  deck  in  true 
man-o'-war  fashion. 

"  Why,  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I,  "  you  have  a  regular 
man-of-war  brig  here." 

"Yes,"  he  replied,  leading  the  way  to  his  cabin,  "  she's 
a  Johnny  War.  Mr.  Carline,  (second  lieutenant,)  hoist  in 
boats,  and  get  ready  for  weighing  anchor,  sir." 

"  Now,  Garnet,"  he  continued,  as  we  were  drinking  wine 
in  the  cabin,  "  you  had  better  reconsider,  and  go  with  me. 
You  can  make  your  fortune  in  one  cruise  on  the  coast  of 
Africa,  where  we  are  bound." 

"  Save  your  breath  to  cool  your  porridge,  friend  Sey- 
mour," said  I,  "  for  I  tell  you  flatly,  I  will  not  go  ;  and  you 
may  as  well  set  your  mind  at  ease  on  that  point,  for  I  have 
no  more  dodge  about  me  than  the  main-mast." 

At  this  instant,  a  reefer  reported  all  ready  for  weighing 
anchor. 

"  Call  all  hands  up  anchor,  then,"  said  he.  "  Garnet, 
will  you  take  the  trumpet,  just  to  oblige  me  ?  I  have  some 
writing  to  do  before  we  leave  the  port." 

I  took  the  deck,  accordingly.  The  capstan  was  manned, 
the  anchor  run  up,  and  sail  made ;  and  with  a  smacking 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  9 

breeze  from  the  northwest,  we  dropped  down  the  bay.    Just 
before  we  reached  the  quarantine,  Seymour  came  on  deck. 

"  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I,  "  you  will  please  take  com- 
mand :  I  wish  to  be  set  on  shore  here.  Port,  quarter- 
master. Boatswain's-mate,  call  away  third-cutters." 

"  Belay  all  1"  interrupted  Seymour.  "Lieutenant  Garnet, 
you  are  in  for  it,  and  shall  go  with  me  anyhow." 

"Perhaps  I  shall,"  said  I,  dispatching  the  trumpet  at 
his  head,  as  I  walked  forward  to  the  starboard-gangway  to 
look  out  for  a  shore-boat.  There  was  none  near,  and  look- 
ing aft,  I  saw  Seymour  clear  away  the  end  of  the  main- 
royal-halliard,  and  tie  it  in  a  running-bowline.  That  ma- 
noeuvre showed  me  that  there  was  no  time  to  be  lost,  and 
as  we  were  now  in  the  narrows,  and  within  a  hundred  yards 
of  the  Stateri  Island  shore,  I  buttoned  my  roundabout,  and 
hailing  Seymour,  "Here  goes  for  the  coast  of  Africa!" 
jumped  overboard  and  struck  out  for  the  land. 

Seymour,  however,  was  as  wide  awake  as  I,  and  as  I  rose 
to  strike  out  the  second  time,  his  running-bowline  came  over 
my  head,  caught  me  round  the  body,  and  I  was  hauled  on 
board  before  I  knew  what  was  the  matter. 

"  There,"  said  he,  laughing,  as  he  met  me  at  the  gang- 
way, "  you  see  I  am  a  bit  of  a  Guacho,  and  can  throw  a 
lasso  on  a  pinch.  You  are  hung  round  the  waist,  now,  just 
as  you  wished  not  long  since." 

My  reply  to  his  wit  was  a  blow  with  my  fist,  which  tum- 
bled him  across  the  deck  in  fine  style  ;  but  before  I  could 
repeat  it,  I  was  overpowered,  and  being  taken  upon  the 
poop,  was  lashed  hand  and  foot  to  a  carronade. 

"  Now  then,  Lieutenant  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  "  when 
we  get  out  of  sight  of  land,  I'll  loose  you  ;  but  if  I  were 
to  do  it  sooner,  Fm  afraid  you  would  be  overboard  again." 

As  I  could  not  do  battle,  I  quietly  submitted  to  my  fate, 
because  swearing  would  do  no  good.  So  now  behold  me, 

1* 


10  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

bound  for  foreign  parts — first  lieutenant  of  a  brig-of-war — 
anchored  head  and  stern  athwart-ships  of  a  carronade.  As 
we  passed  the  forts,  the  first  object  which  met  our  view  was 
the  frigate  Constellation,  at  anchor  in  the  lower  bay. 

"  The  devil !"  said  Seymour,  clapping  a  spy-glass  to  his 
eye  ;  "  she  dropped  down  yesterday,  and  had,  I  supposed, 
gone  to  sea.  I  remember  they  looked  at  me  pretty  hard  as 
they  passed  me  at  anchor,  and  now  they  are  waiting  to 
catch  me.  Fll  weather  them  yet." 

As  we  neared  the  frigate,  I  observed  some  motion  aboard 
of  her  ;  and  in  an  instant  after,  all  the  ports  of  the  main- 
gun-deck,  on  the  starboard  side — the  side  toward  us,  as  she 
rode  at  anchor — were  taken  out,  and  the  tompions  of  all 
that  battery  followed. 

"  Do  you  see  that,  Captain  Seymour  ?"  said  I,  smiling. 

"I  do,  Lieutenant  Garnet,"  was  his  reply.  "Port, 
quarter-master." 

"  Port,  sir." 

"Mr.  Carline,"  he  continued,  "take the  deck,  sir,  while  I 
uniform.  Keep  her  head  for  the  stern  of  that  frigate." 

He  went  into  the  cabin,  and  in  a  moment  reappeared,  in 
the  full  uniform  of  the  United  States'  Navy,  cocked-hat, 
sword,  a  pair  of  pistols  in  his  belt,  and  a  cigar  in  his  mouth. 
As  he  came  upon  the  poop,  a  sheet  of  red  flame  glanced 
from  one  of  the  Constellation's  ports,  which  was  followed 
by  the  emphatic  report  of  a  thirty-two-pounder.  The  ball, 
by  accident  of  course,  struck  our  cut-water,  and  made  us 
minus  a  figure-head. 

"The  English  of  that,"  said  Seymour,  "is  'come-to,  you 
rascal.'  Since  my  friend,  the  commodore,  wishes  it,  I'll  do 
that  thing.  Port,  quarter-master.  Keep  her  for  the  bows 
of  the  Constellation.  Loose  royals  and  to'gallantsails,  for 
we've  a  stiff  breeze,  and  I  have  no  idea  of  being  afraid  of 
them.  Send  up  our  black  ensign,  signal-quarter-master,  at 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  11 

the  peak,  fore  and  main,  and  under  it  the  American  flag  ! 
There  I"  smacking  his  lips,  as  that  dread  banner  floated 
gayly  on  the  breeze,  over  the  stars  and  stripes,  "  that  will 
do  better.  Lieutenant  Garnet,  what  say  you  ?" 

"  Go  to  the  devil  I"  I  replied,  for  I  was  not  in  the  best  of 
humor. 

"  If  I  do,  Lieutenant  John  Garnet,"  said  he,  complacently, 
"  I  have  the  satisfaction  of  knowing  that  you  will  sail  in 
company." 

"Cast  loose  both  batteries,"  he  continued,  "and  load 
each  a  round-shot,  a  stand  of  grape  and  canister,  and  fill 
the  long  forty-two  to  the  muzzle." 

When  we  were  about  two  hundred  yards  from  the  frigate, 
dashing  ahead  at  ten  knots,  he  ordered  the  drums  to  beat 
to  quarters,  took  his  stand  upon  the  starboard-quarter  rail 
to  cun  the  brig,  and  sung  out  : 

"  Slack  the  lee-braces — round-in  the  weather  ones — star- 
board the  helm,  hard-a-starboard  !" 

We  fell  off  before  the  wind,  and  passed  abreast  the  Con- 
stellation, as  she  rode  head  to  the  wind,  so  closely,  that  the 
muzzles  of  her  long  main-deckers  almost  touched  our  bul- 
warks. The  captain  of  the  Constellation  stood  abaft  upon 
the  signal-locker  ;  and  Seymour  coolly  tossing  his  cigar  upon 
her  deck,  hailed  him  : 

"  Brother  commodore,  if  you  are  short  of  hands,  I'll  lend 
you  a  hundred,  and  take  payment  in  round-shot  and 
canister." 

"  Commodore  Montague,"  /  hailed,  "  I  am  detained  here 
by  force.  Compel  my  release,  sir." 

"  Heave-to,  you  sir,"  said  Montague  to  Seymour,  "  and 
send  that  man  aboard  of  me,  instantly." 

"  Fll  see  you first,"  was  Seymour's  resolute  reply. 

"  Heave-to,  instantly,"  repeated  Montague,  "  or  I'll  sink 
you  V9 


12  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  Do  it,  and  be to  you,"  replied  Seymour,  drawing 

his  cutlass  in  defence.  "  Man  the  starboard-battery  !  Port, 
hard-a-port — stand  by — mind  the  weather  roll — fire  I" 

We  passed  under  the  Constellation's  stern,  raking  her,  as 
each  gun  came  to  bear,  dismounting  her  stern  chasers,  and 
clearing  her  main-gun-deck  entirely,  for  the  moment. 

"  Starboard  the  helm  I"  hailed  Seymour,  firing  a  pistol  at 
Montague. 

We  fell  off  before  the  wind,  and  keeping  the  Constella- 
tion's three  masts  in  one,  made  all  sail  for  the  bar,  there 
being  no  time  for  chat,  as  she  of  course  would  instantly  slip 
her  cable,  and  bring  her  broadside  to  bear.  Our  fears  were 
groundless,  though  Seymour's  matchless  effrontery  was  all 
that  saved  him.  While  the  Constellation's  guns  actually 
bore  upon  us,  they  were  restrained  from  firing,  by  their 
amazement  at  the  impudence  of  the  "  little  fellow  ;w  and,  at 
this  moment,  they  could  not  fire  if  they  would.  Their  cap- 
stan-bars were  shipped,  and  everything  was  in  readiness  for 
weighing  anchor,  when  we  hove  in  sight ;  but  our  strange 
conduct  perplexed  Captain  Montague,  and  our  raking 
broadside  completely  nonplussed  him.  Our  shot  unshipped 
his  capstan-bars,  cut  up  his  messenger,  and  totally  demol- 
ished the  bitts  where  the  cable  was  belayed  ;  in  consequence 
of  which,  the  cable  ran  out  until  it  was  brought  up  by 
getting  foul  in  the  hause-hole,  and  there  it  was  jammed 
perfectly  fast. 

The  combination  of  so  many  unusual  events  produced  an 
unwonted  result ;  and  for  the  first  time  since  tar  and  oakum 
came  into  fashion,  a  United  States'  ship  was  in  confusion  ; 
and  before  order  was  restored,  we  were  across  the  bar,  and 
nearly  out  of  shot,  without  the  loss  of  a  man.  Perceiving 
that  I  might  as  well  make  the  best  of  a  bad  bargain,  I 
hailed  Seymour  : 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  13 

i 

"  Cut  these  lashings,  Tom  ;  I  will  do  as  you  wish,  since 
I  can't  avoid  it." 

"  You  are  a  clever  fellow,  Garnet,"  said  he,  complying 
with  my  request ;  "I  like  your  spunk.  You  are  just  the 
man  to  be  my  first  lieutenant :  will  you  take  that 
command  ?" 

"  I  will,"  said  I,  "  and  I'll  be  obeyed  and  respected 
accordingly." 

"  It  is  a  bargain,"  he  replied,  grasping  my  hand  ;  and, 
turning  to  his  crew,  he  informed  them  of  my  elevation,  and 
commanded  their  obedience. 

"  The  Constellation  has  slipped  her  cable,  sir,"  reported 
the  signal-quarter-master,  "  and  is  making  all  sail  in  chase." 
.  «  yerv  good,"  answered  Seymour,  "  she  cannot  catch  us." 

"You  are  wrong  there,"  said  I,  "  she  brings  the  breeze 
with  her,  and  as  it  will  soon  blow  a  gale,  she  will  have  the 
advantage." 

"  Night  is  coming  on,"  said  Seymour,  "  and  we'll  dodge 
them.  That  we  can  do  at  any  rate." 

"  You  will  please  remember,  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I, 
"  that  you  have  a  Yankee  to  deal  with  ;  and,  moreover,  the 
fellows  whose  skins  you  chafed  with  grape  and  cannister 
will  feel  rather  touchy,'  and  keep  a  bright  look-out." 

"  Ay,"  replied  he,  smiling,  "  and  the  commodore,  too, 
will  like  an  opportunity  to  return  my  pistol-shot.  Take 
the  deck,  Garnet,  while  I  work  up  my  reckoning,  and  make 
my  will." 

It  was  now  growing  dark,  and  the  array  of  clouds  in  the 
northwest,  and  the  increasing  swell  of  the  sea,  plainly 
showed  that  a  gale  was  coming.  It  was,  therefore,  neces- 
sary to  get  all  the  start  we  could  before  it  came  on  to  blow  ; 
for  in  a  gale  the  Constellation,  being  larger  and  heavier, 
could  carry  sail  longer  than  we,  and  of  course  would  over- 


14  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OK, 

take  us.  I  accordingly  gave  orders  to  set  fore  and  main- 
royals,  and  fore  and  mam-topmast-studdin'-sails,  and  as  she 
bore  that  well,  I  added  topgallant -studdin'-sails,  boarded 
the  starboard-tack?,  and  putting  her  head  south-by-west, 
we  were  off  at  twelve  knots  an  hour. 

It  was  now  nearly  dark,  but  with  our  night  glasses  we 
could  see  the  Constellation,  under  sky-sails,  and  royal-stud- 
dm'-sails,  steering  directly  for  us,  with  the  speed  and  the 
fury  of  an  avalanche. 

"  Well/7  said  Seymour,  watching  her  with  his  spy-glass, 
"unless  Montague  takes  in  his  sky-sails  and  royal-studdin'- 
sails  pretty  soon,  he  will  have  the  royal-masts  over  the  side, 
for  the  breeze  is  much  fresher  with  him  than  with  us." 

At  this  moment  a  heavy  squall  struck  the  Constellation  : 
as  soon  as  it  cleared  up,  the  sign  al^quarter-m  aster  reported 
that  her  sky-sails  and  royal-studdin'-sails  were  blown  away. 

"  That's  good  news,"  said  Seymour,  chuckling  ;  "  Garnet, 
we'll  distance  them  yet."  '••"'*' 

"  She  has  bent  new  sky-sails,  sir,"  reported  the  quarter- 
master, a  moment  after. 

"  The  devil  she  has  !"  said  Tom,  stopping  short  in  his 
walk — "  why,  she's  in  earnest.  Set  our  royal-studdin'-sails, 
and  sky-sails,  Mr.  Garnet — we'll  pull  foot." 

I  obeyed  the  order,  and  away  we  went,  with  our  studdin'- 
sail  tacks,  and  royal  and  skysail  back-stays,  as  taut  as  bars 
of  iron. 

For  a  while  nothing  material  happened,  and  each  about 
held  her  own  ;  but  at  two  bells  in  the  evening  watch,  the 
Constellation's  skysails  and  royal-studdin'-sails  blew  away, 
and  the  skysail  masts  overboard. 

"  That  is  a  fair  hint,"  observed  Seymour  :  "  Mr.  Garnet, 
we'll  save  our  skysails,  and  royal-studdin'-sails.  Take  them 
in,  sir." 

The  order  was  obeyed,  and  for  a  moment  the  brig  was 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  15 

easier — but  the  wind  freshening  very  much,  we  were  obliged 
soon  after  to  furl  the  royals  ;  and,  shortening  sail  as  it  be- 
came necessary,  at  four  bells  in  the  evening-watch  we  were 
under  main-to'-gallantsail,  while  the  frigate  had  all  three 
to'-gallantsails  and  main  royal  standing,  coming  on  "  hand 
over  fist."  At  six  bells  she  was  within  range  of  our  long 
forty-two — a  heavier  gun  than  any  she  carried.  It  being 
run  out  at  a  stern  port,  Seymour  pointed  it  himself,  and 
watching  the  send-forward,  fired.  The  ball  struck  the 
frigate's  figure-head,  scattering  it  about  in  fine  style. 

"  There/7  said  Seymour,  laughing,  "  we  are  even  now. 
She  knocked  my  figure-head  to  pieces  in  the  bay,  and  now 
I  have  given  her  as  good.*' 

After  we  had  fired  a  few  times,  the  frigate's  bow-chasers 
began  to  give  tongue  ;  and,  each  hoping  to  disable  the 
other,  shots  were  exchanged  with  great  gusto,  although  it 
was  too  dark  to  see  the  effect.  But,  in  spite  of  everything, 
she  continued  to  gain  upon  us,  and  at  two  bells  in  the  mid- 
watch  was  within  two  miles  of  us,  the  wind  blowing  a  gale, 
under  whole  topsails  and  courses,  while  we  had  a  reef  in 
each. 

As  a  last  refuge,  we  bore  off  before  the  wind,  continuing 
to  blaze  away  with  our  long  forty-two,  while  she,  as  we  kept 
her  three  masts  in  one,  could  not  fire  a  shot ;  but,  although 
our  shot  evidently  told,  they  did  not  do  much  mischief. 

At  four  bells  in  the  mid-watch,  she  was  within  half-a-mile, 
and  was  preparing  to  give  us  a  broadside,  which  would  have 
paid  off  all  scores,  when  a  tremendous  squall  suddenly  came 
over,  and  it  became  entirely  dark. 

We  hauled  our  wind  instantly,  boarded  our  larboard- 
tacks,  put  out  every  light,  a-nd  kept  silence  fore-and-aft.  The 
frigate,  not  aware  of  that  manoeuvre,  continued  her  course, 
and  in  five  minutes  dashed  past  us,  and  we  were  safe,  being 
dead  to  windward.  It  continued  very  dark  for  half  an 


16  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

hour,  and  when  it  finally  cleared  up  a  little,  the  Constellation 
was  nearly  hull-down  in  the  southeast.  So  we  escaped  her 
that  time,  and  when  we  had  stood  northeast  long  enough, 
we  squared  away,  and  as  the  gale  moderated,  made  all  sail 
for  the  southward  and  eastward. 

A  few  days  after  these  occurrences,  the  look-out  aloft, 
one  morning,  reported  a  sail  ahead  crossing  our  course. 

"  Keep  her  away  for  that  vessel,  sir,"  said  Seymour  to 
the  officer  of  the  deck,  "and  call  all  hands  to  make  sail." 

Taking  the  deck,  as,  according  to  man-of-war  rules,  it 
was  my  duty  to  do  when  all  hands  were  called,  I  made  all 
sail  a  trifle  quicker  than  lightning,  and  then  surrendered  the 
trumpet  to  the  officer  of  the  watch. 

The  stranger,  perceiving  that  we  were  chasing  him,  made 
all  sail  to  avoid  us  ;  but  it  was  not  so  easy  to  escape,  when 
it  put  the  wind  out  of  breath  to  keep  up  with  us ;  and  ac- 
cordingly we  were  very  soon  so  near  that  they,  in  obedi- 
ence, to  our  signal-gun,  hove  to.  We  hove-to  also,  and  a 
boat  being  lowered  and  manned,  Seymour  said  to  me  : 

"When  I  wave  my  handkerchief,  Garnet,  send  up  our 
black  ensign  at  the  main,  and  fire  a  gun  across  that  fellow's 
bows ;"  and  jumping  into  the  boat,  he  boarded  the  stran- 
ger, whom  we  now  perceived  was  an  outward-bound  English 
East-Indiaman.  We  were  so  near,  that  I  distinctly  saw 
all  his  motions.  Leaving  the  crew  in  the  boat,  he  boarded 
the  Englishman  alone,  and  meeting  her  captain  at  the  gang- 
way, he  saluted  him  very  politely,  and  took  a  turn  or  two 
with  him  upon  the  deck,  as  if  inquiring  the  news.  Shortly 
after,  however,  he  apparently  made  some  disagreeable  re- 
mark, for  they  both  stopped,  and  began  to  gesticulate  vio- 
lently, as  if  their  discourse  was  becoming  interesting  ;  and 
Seymour,  drawing  his  handkerchief  from  his  pocket,  care- 
lessly waved  it,  by  way  of  accenting  his  discourse.  In- 
stantly the  sable  banner  of  piracy  floated  at  the  mast-head, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  17 

and  an  eighteen-pound  shot,  travelling  across  the  English- 
man's fore-foot,  put  an  end  to  his  opposition,  and  he  began 
to  execute  Seymour's  mandates.  A  lot  of  kegs  were  shortly 
after  passed  into  our  boat,  in  a  manner  which  showed  that, 
at  the  least,  they  were  heavy,  and  Seymour,  courteously  bid- 
ding Captain  Bull  adieu,  pulled  aboard. 

"Hoist  those  up  carefully,  my  lads,"  said  he. 

"What  have  you  there,  Captain  Seymour  ?"  I  inquired. 

"  Only  a  few  thousand  guineas,  Lieutenant  Garnet,"  he 
replied,  "which  I  borrowed  from  that  ship." 

"He'll  be  lucky,"  said  I,  "if  he  ever  gets  his  pay." 


CHAPTER    II. 

ONE  morning,  about  forty-five  days  after  we  left  New- 
York,  we  made  land  in  the  Gulf  of  Guinea.  Crowding  all 
sail,  we  rapidly  approached  it,  and  were  within  five  or  six 
miles,  when  a  long,  low,  black,  suspicious-looking  schooner, 
shot  out  from  behind  a  small  island,  a  short  distance  ahead, 
and,  without  asking  any  questions,  bore  down  for  us. 

"Ready-about!  ready,  ready!"  hailed  Seymour,  with 
startling  quickness,  seizing  the  trumpet.  The  helm  was 
put  down,  and  in  an  instant  we  were  on  the  other  tack, 
standing  out  to  sea. 

"  I  know  her  !"  ejaculated  Seymour — "  she  is^an  English 
man-of-war,  and  is  commanded  by  one  of  the  sharpest  ras- 
cals that  ever  drew  pay  and  rations.  He  calls  his  schooner 
the  '  Dare-devil/  and  no  «ame  was  ever  so  appropriate,  for 
both  master  and  vessel.  He  attacks  everything,  large  and 
small ;  laughs  at  steel  and  gunpowder,  and  I  do  not  believe 
he  knows  what  fear  is.  The  world  is  not  wide  enough  to 
hold  both  of  us,  and  come  what  may,  there  will  be  one  ras- 
cal less  on  the  seas  at  sunset.  I  have  sworn  vengeance 


18  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

against  him,  and  I  will  take  it  so  amply,  that  none  shall 
live  to  report  to  the  Lords  of  the  Admiralty  in  what  man- 
ner one  of  his  Majesty >s  cruisers  went  to  the  devil." 

When  we  were  twelve  or  fifteen  miles  from  the  land,  we 
tacked  again,  and  although  the  breeze  was  a  stiff  one,  set 
every  inch  of  canvas  and  stood  in  for  the  shore.  The 
schooner  continued  her  course,  and  standing  on  opposite 
tacks,  we  rapidly  neared  each  other.  Our  ports  were 
closed,  and  as  we  made  no  use  of  our  guns,  the  English 
evidently  supposed  that  what  appeared  to  be  long  eighteens, 
were  actually  quaker-guns,  made  of  the  best  of  wood — for 
show,  not  use — and  that  our  plan  was  to  cross  their  hawse, 
and  run  in-shore. 

As  soon  as  we  were  within  range,  they  opened  upon  us 
with  a  long  twenty-four ;  and,  to  do  them  justice,  they 
tossed  their  iron  with  most  terrible  exactness  and  consider- 
able effect ;  but  as  her  shot  hulled  us,  they  did  not  interfere 
with  Seymour's  plan. 

Ordering  the  men  to  lie  down  upon  deck,  to  avoid  the 
Englishman's  fire,  he  continued  to  walk  upon  the  poop  as 
composedly  as  if  he  were  ball-proof ;  although,  as  her  bat- 
tery (long-twelves)  began  to  take  effect,  the  shot  flew 
thick  as  hail,  tearing  open  our  bulwarks,  and  knocking  the 
white  splinters  about  in  every  direction.  As  we  approached 
still  nearer,  her  musketry  opened  upon  us  in  full  volley  ; 
yet,  although  he  was  the  target  for  every  shot,  he  seemed 
totally  unconscious  of  danger.  With  a  flushed  cheek,  and 
an  eye  flashing  fire,  he  stood  proudly  erect,  and  delivered 
his  orders  to  the  man-at-the-whed,  as  composedly  as  if  he 
were  setting  a  studdin'-sail. 

When  our  flying-jib-boom  was  nearly  locking  with  hers, 
he  suddenly  shouted,  with  a  voice  like  a  trumpet-call : 
"  STARBOARD  THE  HELM  !"  We  fell  off  from  the  wind,  and, 
rising  upon  a  wave,  our  heavy  bows  struck  the  fated  vessel 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  19 

amidships  with  a  tremendous  crash.  We  passed  clean  over, 
cutting  her  completely  in  two  :  an  unearthly  yell  arose  from 
a  hundred  and  fifty  brave  fellows,  as  they  sunk  quick  to  the 
bottom ;  and  when  we  flew  aft  to  catch  a  glimpse  of  the 
wreck,  nothing  was  visible,  save  the  pennant  at  the  main- 
to'-gallant-mast-head,  which  for  an  instant  floated  upon  the 
surface  of  the  deep,  and  was  then  drawn  down  after  the 
hapless  wretches,  who  had  so  often  shed  their  blood  in  its 
defence  1 

Having  passed  the  vortex  caused  by  her  going  down,  the 
brig  was  hove-to  ;  as  I  supposed  for  the  purpose  of  picking 
up  the  survivors,  if  there  were  any.  But  such  was  not 
Seymour's  plan — and  one  poor  fellow,  who,  stunned  and 
strangling,  rose  to  the  surface,  clinging  to  a  spar  for  dear 
life,  was  not  even  allowed  the  miserable  privilege  of  floating 
upon  it,  until  the  sharks,  or  the  burning  sun  of  the  Equator, 
should  put  a  period  to  his  agony,  but  was  deliberately  shot 
by  Seymour  himself,  acting  upon  the  stern  maxim  that 
"  dead  men  tell  no  tales."  A  deed  of  so  dark  a  hue  was 
never  before  perpetrated  under  the  azure  sky,  nor  on  the 
deep  sea,  since  the  unborn  surges  slumbered  in  chaos,  and 
darkness  lay  upon  the  face  of  the  deep. 

"Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  recovering  his  rifle  as 
if  he  had  been  shooting  a  duck,  "  fill  the  main-topsail,  and 
stand  iii-shore." 

Three  times  I  raised  the  trumpet  to  my  lips,  to  give  the 
necessary  orders,  and  as  often  withdrew  it ;  and  finally, 
being  totally  unable  to  command  either  my  voice  or  my 
feelings,  I  dashed  it  down  upon  deck,  and  walked  away 
without  a  word. 

Seymour  looked  up  at  me  in  surprise,  and  then,  deliberately 
picking  up  the  trumpet,  gave  the  requisite  commands  with 
his  usual  composure.  When  we  were  under-way,  standing 
for  the  shore,  he  ordered  the  boatswain  to  call  "  all  hands 


20  SWELL-LIFE    AT    SEA)     OB, 

to  splice  the  main-brace,"  remarking,  that  the  toast  should 
be,  "Here's  wishing  the  Dare-devils  a  pleasant  passage 
to  1" 

"  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  when  we  were  about  three 
miles  from  the  shore,  "  do  you  see  that  head-land  yonder, 
in  the  south-east?  It  is  the  northern  cape  of  the  bay 
which  we  shall  enter,  and  is  now  sixteen  miles  distant.  I 
wish  you  to  observe  the  course  we  take  to  fetch  it,  and  then 
say  if  this  coast  was  not  cut  out  for  the  express  benefit  of 
the  slave-trade." 

We  continued  our  course,  steering  head-on,  until  within 
half  a  mile  of  the  shore,  and  then  hauled  our  wind,  and  put 
her  head  due  south,  keeping  parallel  to  the  beach.  About 
ten  minutes  afterward,  the  look-out,  on  the  fore-topsail- 
yard,  sung  out : 

"  Breakers  ahead  !" 

Seymour  was  standing  upon  the  poop,  looking  astern  : 
he  turned  short  around  at  this  announcement,  and  hailed  : 

"  Fore-topsail-yard  there  !  Two  points  on  the  starboard 
bow,  you  lubber,  distant  two  miles." 

"  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I,  in  surprise,  "your  eye-sight 
is  better  than  mine.  Those  breakers  are  not  visible  from 
the  deck." 

"  I  know  it,"  he  replied,  "  but  I  am  as  well  acquainted 
with  every  inch  of  this  coast  as  you  are  with  the  pavements 
of  Broadway.  I  could  sail  a  line-of-battle-ship  through  this 
channel,  in  perfect  safety,  the  darkest  night  old  ocean  ever 
saw,  by  the  lead  alone.  Straight  as  you  go,  quarter- 
master." 

"  Dise,  no  higher,"  repeated  he  at  the  cun. 

"These  breakers,"  continued  Seymour,  "  are  caused  by  a 
reef  of  rocks,  running  across  the  mouth  of  that  bay,  and 
stretching  ten  miles  each  way,  parallel  to  the  beach,  and 
distant  from  it,  on  the  average,  half  a  mile.  Inside  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  21 

reef  we  have  a  clear,  safe  channel,  carrying  ten  fathom 
water,  to  within  a  ship's  length  of  the  beach,  and  at  both 
ends  a  safe  entrance.  Now  all  this  is  for  our  particular 
benefit ;  for,  in  order  to  enter  that  bay  a  vessel  must  go  all 
this  distance  around ;  and  while  a  man-of-war  comes  in  at 
one  end,  we  can  slip  out  at  the  other.  If  this  does  not 
prove  that  Jemmy  Flatfoot  had  a  hand  in  laying  out  the 
coast  of  Africa,  yon  may  call  me  a  marine." 

"  Pretty  good  reasoning,  friend  Seymour,"  said  I : 
''you've  made  it  very  plain  that  the  Devil  is  chief  cook 
and  bottle-washer  for  the  slave-trade.  I  don't  wonder  it 
prospers  so  well,  since  he  is  at  the  wheel." 

We  were  now  inside  the  reef,  and  sailing  along  rapidly, 
were  within  a  mile  of  the  entrance  to  the  bay,  when  a  small 
canoe  shoved  off  from  the  shore,  and  we  were  boarded  by 
one  of  the  most  hideous-looking  black  rascals  that  ever 
walked  on  two  feet.  Running  up  the  side  like  a  monkey, 
he  tumbled  over  the  gangway,  and  accosted  Seymour,  who 
met  him  there,  as  an  old  friend  ;  and  after  jabbering  away 
a  few  minutes  in  some  barbarous  lingo,  he  took  a  bottle  of 
rum,  which  Seymour  had  ordered  for  him,  rolled  into  his 
canoe,  and  run  it  high  and  dry  on  the  beach.  He  brought 
himself  to  anchor  in  the  sand,  and  began  to  discuss  the  con- 
tents of  the  said  bottle  with  an  earnestness  which  plainly 
showed  that  they  two  would  not  part  company,  until  one 
or  t'other  knocked  under. 

"Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  walking  aft,  "my  good 
friend  there  has  informed  me,  that  there  are  now  two  Eng- 
lish frigates  at  anchor  in  the  bay.  I  must  send  them  both 
to  sea  in  twenty  minutes  after  I  enter.  Do  you  speak  Por- 
tuguese ?" 

"Si,  Senhor,"  said  I,  "  and  every  other  language  ;  except- 
ing, always,  the  gibberish  of  that  black  friend  of  yours." 

"  Yery  good,"  he  replied ;  "  I  shall  report  myself  to  the 


22  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA  ;    OR, 

English  as  Don  So-and-so,  (with  a  string  of  titles  as  long  as 
the  main-to'-bowline,)  commander  of  the  Brazilian  brig-of- 
war  AchilM,  24,  on  a  cruise ;  and  will  spin  them  a  yarn, 
which  will  clear  the  bay  of  them  as  soon  as  they  can  up 
anchor.  I  have  Brazilian  uniforms  for  all  the  officers  and 
myself,  which  we  will  bend  now,  and  walk  into  the  bay 
under  Brazilian  colors." 

We  rigged  ourselves  accordingly,  and  mustering  upon  the 
poop,  sailed  into  the  harbor,  with  the  Brazilian  ensign  at 
the  peak.  It  was  quite  small,  and  the  English  frigates 
were  at  anchor,  near  the  centre  of  it,  some  distance  asun- 
der. Gradually  shortening  sail,  we  backed  our  main-top- 
sail abreast  the  Commodore's  ship,  within  about  two  hun- 
dred yards  ;  and  when  we  had  lost  headway,  I  roared  out 
in  Portuguese — (for  their  edification:) 

"  Let  go  the  starboard  anchor  !"  twisting  the  n's  and  the 
ojs  and  the  r's  about  in  every  direction.  We  then  furled 
sails,  squared  the  yards  by  the  lifts  and  braces,  hooked  the 
yard-tackles,  hoisted  our  boats,  and  manning  the  captain's 
barge  with  Portuguese,  Seymour  pulled  aboard  the  English 
flag-ship.  He  was  received  with  the  usual  honors,  and  had 
been  on  board  but  a  few  minutes,  when  three  small  flags 
were  fun  up  at  the  mizen,  and  a  gun  fired  to  awake  the 
other  frigate.  Not  being  conversant  with  the  English  code 
of  signals,  I  did  not  know  what  to  make  of  this,  when  an 
old  quarter-master,  who  had  served  under  Nelson,  perceiv- 
ing my  ignorance,  informed  me  that  it  was,  "  Hoist  in 
boats,  and  prepare  to  weigh." 

The  English  ships  were  now  all  alive.  Boat  after  boat 
was  dropped  alongside  from  the  guess-warp,  and  hoisted  in, 
two  at  a  time,  (one  each  side,)  decks  cleared  up,  and  cap- 
stans manned.  At  this  moment  Seymour  came  over  the 
gangway  of  the  flag-ship,  and  as  he  shoved  off,  the  Brazilian 
flag  was  sent  up  at  the  fore,  and  saluted  with  eleven  guns. 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  23 

We  returned  the  salute — British  ensign  at  the  fore,  with  the 
same  number — and  as  they,  having  weighed  anchor,  swept 
past  us,  making  sail,  we  gave  them  three  cheers,  which  were 
duly  returned. 

"  Seymour,"  said  I,  when  the  bustle  was  over,  "  what  did 
you  tell  that  fellow  ?" 

"  Oh  I"  said  he,  recovering  breath  after  a  severe  fit  of 
laughter,  "it  was  not  any  of  your  land-yarns,  slack-twisted 
stuff ;  it  was  an  out-and-outer.  When  I  first  boarded  her, 
I  began  by  asking,  very  coolly,  in  Portuguese,  what  were 
the  names  of  the  frigates,  where  they  were  from,  and  where 
bound,  and  whom  I  had  the  honor  of  addressing,  etc.  The 
crusty  old  commodore,  having  answered  my  questions  in  as 
few  words  as  possible,  in  Spanish,  desired  to  know  the  same 
of  me,  and  asked  if  I  could  speak  English.  But  devil  the 
bit  of  English  could  I  speak  :  '  No  intendez  Englise,  Senor,' 
said  I,  with  a  face  as  long  as  the  jib-do wnhaul,  and  then 
proceeded  to  tell  him  that  my  name  was  '  Don  So-and-so  ;' 
that  my  brig  was  the  Brazilian  brig-of-war  Achille  on  a 
cruise  ;  that  we  fell  in,  this  morning,  with  a  suspicious-look- 
ing schooner,  mounting  eighteen  guns,  under  English  colors, 
and  gave  her  chase  ;  but  as  she  stood  out  to  sea,  and  sailed 
very  fast,  we  had  given  over  the  chase,  because  we  had  been 
on  short  allowance  of  water  for  ten  days,  and  had  only  one 
day's  allowance  left,  and  dared  not  stand  out  until  we  had 
filled;, that  I  came  in  Ifere  for  a  supply,  and  intended  to 
sail  the  next  day,  and  catch  the  slaver  if  possible,  and  sling 
up  the  rascals  at  my  yard-arm ;  and  added,  by  way  of 
clincher,  that  I  wished  they  would  not  trouble  themselves 
about  her,  but  leave  her  for  me,  as  I  had  set  my  heart  on 
sending  her  to  the  bottom. 

"  '  That  will  do  for  marines/  said  the  commodore  to  his 
first  lieutenant,  in  English  ;  '  on  short  allowance  of  water, 
indeed  I  If  he  had  said  short  allowance  of  courage,  he 


24  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

would  have  come  nearer  the  truth.  He  was  afraid  the 
slaver  would  be  a  Scotch  prize  to  him,  if  he  meddled  with 
her.  He  will  take  the  best  of  good  care  not  to  chase  her 
again.  He  set  his  heart  on  sending  them  to  the  bottom, 
indeed  ! — ha,  ha,  ha  !'  And  the  old  knight  laughed  loud 
and  long  at  my  bravado.  Then,  turning  to  me,  he  asked 
in  Spanish  all  about  the  schooner,  when  I  saw  her,  the 
course  she  was  steering,  when  I  lost  sight  of  her,  etc.,  and 
ended  by  ordering  his  first  lieutenant  to  hoist  in  boats,  and 
prepare  to  weigh,  making  signal  to  the  other  frigate  to  dp 
the  same.  He  then  talked  about  matters  and  things ; 
asked,  and  told  the  news ;  and  when  I  took  leave,  waited 
on  me  to  the  gangway  very  politely,  expressing  his  sorrow 
that  he  had  not  time  to  visit  me,  but  hoped  that,  as  I  should 
sail  to-morrow,  we  should  meet  on  the  sea,  and  perhaps 
have  the  pleasure  of  capturing  the  pirate  together  ;  adding, 
with  a  wink  to  his  first  lieutenant,  which  nearly  capsized  my 
gravity,  that  nothing  would  gratify  him  more  than  to  fight 
in  such  valiant  company.  So  much  for  so  much,"  continued 
Seymour,  bursting  into  a  roar  of  laughter,  in  which  all 
hands  heartily  joined  :  "  Hurra  for  John  Bull  1" 

By  the  time  our  mirth  had  subsided,  the  English  frigates 
were  out  of  sight,  having  doubled  the  northern  point  of  the 
bay.  Seymour  having  satisfied  himself  of  this  fact,  said  to 
me : 

"All  hands  up  anchor!  Mr.  Garnet,  this  bay  is  no 
place  for  us." 

After  giving  the  requisite  orders  in  preparation,  I  desired 
to  know  for  what  purpose  he  weighed,  and  whither  we 
were  bound. 

"We  are  going  up  the  river,  to  be  sure,"  he  replied,  "in 
order  to  get  our  live  lumber  aboard." 

"  I  see  no  river,"  said  I,  looking  carefully  around  the 
bay. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  25 

"  I  will  show  it  to  you  in  fifteen  minutes,"  answered  Sey- 
mour :  "  so  now  up  anchor,  for  the  wind  is  fair,  and  we've 
no  time  to  lose." 

The  anchor  was  soon  at  the  bows,  and  sail  being  made, 
we  stood  for  the  head  of  the  bay,  which,  as  I  h.ave  already 
said,  was  quite  small — about  three  miles  in  length,  and  one 
in  width  at  the  mouth — narrowing,  of  course,  toward  the 
head.  The  land  around  it  was  considerably  elevated,  and 
densely  covered  with  tall  mangroves — and  nowhere  could  I 
see  the  least  indication  of  a  river — the  coast  of  the  bay 
being  of  a  uniform  elevation.  We  went  on,  however,  with 
all  sail  set — and  as  we  neared  the  head  of  the  bay,  I  ob- 
served that  the  water  did  not  shoal  so  much  as  usual,  but 
still  I  saw  nothing  of  the  river.  When  about  a  cable's 
length  from  the  beach,  Seymour  sung  out : 

"  Man  the  starboard  braces — slack  the  larboard  ones — 
square  away  1" 

We  continued  our  course  an  instant  longer,  and  then  put- 
ting up  the  helm,  doubled  a  point,  and  entered  an  inlet, 
which  stretched  inland  toward  the  northeast,  while  our 
course  from  the  mouth  of  the  bay  had  been  due  east.  It 
was  exceedingly  narrow — so  much  so,  indeed,  that  it  seemed 
impossible  for  two  large  ships  to  lie  abreast  in  any  part  of 
it,  and  especially  at  the  entrance.  The  tide  was  now  com- 
ing in,  and  the  wind  being  fair,  we  sailed  quietly  along,  and 
were  about  half-way  through  the  channel,  when  the  lands- 
man in  the  chains,  who  had  been  lazily  reporting  five,  and 
four  and  a  half  fathom,  suddenly  came  out  with  "  A  quar- 
ter less  three,"  and  an  instant  after  "  A  half-two." 

"  Well,  Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  smiling  at  my  sudden 
start  caused  by  this  announcement,  "  do  you  think  we  are 
aground?  This  channel  above  us  carries  fifteen  feet  water 
to  the  bank  on  both  sides,  and  is  perfectly  clear.  There 
you  see  Jemmy  Flatfoot  again — for  a  line-of-battle  ship 


26  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA  ;   OR, 

could  come  into  it  easy  enough,  but  the  next  thing  they 
knew,  they  would  be  fast  in  the  mud,  while  we,  drawing 
less  than  fifteen  feet,  slip  along  unhurt.  You  had  better 
keep  your  eyes  about  you  now,  for  we  may  be  obliged  to 
fight  our  way  out  of  here  yet." 

For  half  a  mile,  the  narrow  channel  was  perfectly  straight, 
but  at  the  end  of  that  distance,  it  formed  an  angle  of  forty- 
five  degrees — and,  on  doubling  the  point,  we  found  ourselves 
in  a  fine,  wide  river,  which  stretched  away  to  the  eastward 
as  far  as  the  eye  could  reach. 

"Now,  John  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  "here  is  a  river  for 
you,  which  would  not  suffer  much  alongside  of  the  Hudson, 

and  moreover Main  chains  there  1  What  water  have 

you  ?" 

The  leadsman  hove  and  sung  out :   "  By  the  mark,  five." 

"Do  you  hear  that?"  continued  Seymour;  "you  see 
there  is  no  want  of  water  here." 

"  Yes,"  I  replied,  "  and  I  am  now  convinced  that  your 
friend  blocked  out  this  place  for  your  especial  benefit." 

Shortly  after,  we  came  to  anchor  near  the  north  bank  of 
the  river,  and  about  two  miles  from  the  last  angle.  On  this 
bank  was  a  collection  of  miserable  mud  huts,  called  a  town; 
and  firing  a  gun  to  awake  them,  we  soon  had  the  governor 
thereof  on  board,  an  unforgotten  mortal,  who,  after  con- 
fabulating awhile  with  Seymour,  promised  him  that  our 
freight  should  "have  quick  dispatch,"  as  he  had  half  a  cargo 
in  store,  and  knew  where  to  catch  the  rest.  Then,  being  a 
large  man  in  his  way,  he  "punished"  a  quart  of  half-and- 
half,  and,  undisturbed  by  the  trifling  potation,  took  a  ten- 
gallon  keg,  jumped  into  his  canoe,  and  went  on  his  errand 
of  love. 

About  noon  of  the  fourth  day  after  our  arrival,  as  we  lay 
quietly  at  anchor  waiting  our  cargo,  Seymour,  who  had  been 
ashore,  returned  aboard  in  great  haste,  and  ordered  me  to 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  27 

.all  all  hands  up  anchor,  which  being  done,  we  were  towed 
down  stream  again  just  above  the  angle  in  the  river. 

"JSTow  then,  Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  "get  a  spring 
on  the  cable,  and  slew  us  round,  so  that  our  starboard  bat- 
tery will  command  that  entrance,  for  I  have  just  been  in- 
formed that  three  English  men-of-war  (a  ship-of-the-line  and 
two  frigates)  are  entering  the  bay." 

"If  it  be  so,"  said  I,  "  they  cannot  get  more  than  half 
way  up  the  narrow  channel,  as  you  well  know." 

"  Ay,"  he  replied,  "  but  their  boats,  my  man — their  boats 
can  come  up." 

The  spring  was  accordingly  applied  to  the  cable,  and  our 
broadside  brought  to  bear  upon  the  entrance  of  the  before- 
mentioned  channel.  We  lay  about  two  hundred  yards  due 
east  from  it,  so  that  anything  coming  up  could  not  see  us 
until  the  point  was  doubled,  for  the  intervening  land  was 
high,  and  thickly  wooded.  Our  guns  were  then  examined,  an 
extra  stand  of  cannister  put  into  each,  and  the  starboard 
battery  depressed  and  pointed  at  the  angle  of  the  river. 
We  had  scarcely  finished  our  preparations,  when  a  six- 
oared  cutter  shot  out  from  behind  the  point,  steering  up 
the  stream. 

"I  give  you  fair  warning,"  shouted  Seymour:  "''bout 
ship,  or  I'll  blow  you  out  of  water." 

"Ay,  ay,  my  fine  fellow,"  said  the  English  lieutenant, 
coolly — ordering  his  men  to  lie  on  their  oars — "of  what 
nation  are  you  ?  where  from — where  bound — and  what  are 
you  doing  here  ?" 

"There,"  said  Seymour,  pointing  to  our  black  flag, 
which  was  at 'this  instant  run  up  at  the  peak — "there  is  my 
flag — the  rest  of  me  you'll  find  out  if  you  come  so  near 
again.  Now  I  advise  you  to  pull  back  to  your  ship,  other- 
wise  All  ready,  starboard  battery  !" 

"Thank  you  for  the  hint,  friend,"  said  the  English  lieu- 


28  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

tenant,  "and,  in  return,  I'll  inform  you  that  an  English 
seventy-four  and  two  frigates  are  at  anchor  in  the  bay." 

"I  knew  all  that  before/'  replied  Seymour,  unconcern 
edly. 

"Well,"  said  the  Englishman,  putting  his  boat  about, 
"it's  my  opinion  you'll  know  it  again — so,  good-bye,  so 
long ;"  and  his  men  slowly  giving  way,  he  quietly  doubled 
the  point,  and  pulled  down  the  river. 

"Now,  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  "we'll  have  some  fight- 
ing shortly,  for  I  can't'  afford  to  be  blocked  up  here,  and 
must  and  will  be  at  sea  in  eight-and-forty  hours,  come  what 
may." 

"That's  easier  said  than  done,"  I  replied;  "for  that 
liner's  broadside  would  be  no  child's  play." 

"  Poh  !"  said  he,  contemptuously,  "I  see  you  don't  under- 
stand all  the  tricks  of  the  trade,  yet.  Take  our  third-cutter, 
and  pull  down  that  channel  as  far  as  is  safe,  keeping  close 
in  shore,  and  then  take  to  the  bushes,  and  find  out  what 
those  Englishmen  are  doing,  and  return  quickly.  Mean- 
while, I  will  send  ashore  for  my  slaves." 

I  pulled  down  stream  accordingly,  but  seeing  nothing,  I 
left  the  boat  in  care  of  the  crew,  and  went  on  through  the 
forest  alone,  down  to  the  hill  overlooking  the  bay.  I  then 
saw  that  the  frigates  were  the  same  we  had  sent  to  sea  after 
the  pirate,  and  the  liner  was  a  heavy  one,  carrying  a  hun- 
dred guns.  They  had  anchored,  at  first,  in  the  centre  of  the 
bay,  but  now  all  had  weighed  again.  The  frigates  stood 
down  the  bay,  and  anchored,  one  on  each  side  of  the  mouth , 
athwart-ships  of  the  channel  outside,  while  the  line-of- 
battle  sailed  up  to  the  head  of  the  bay,  put  her  helm  down, 
and  bringing  everything  flat  aback,  shoved  herself  into  the 
narrow  channel  her  own  length,  stern  foremost,  and  then 
anchored  head  and  stern  in  the  middle  of  it. 

"  Pretty  good  seamanship,  Mr.  Bull,"  thought  I,  as  I  oto 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  29 

served  this  plugging-up  manoeuvre — for  there  appeared  to  be 
scarcely  room  for  her  boats  to  pull  alongside  of  her,  much 
less  for  a  ship  to  pass — "it  will  not  be  easy  to  run  by  a 
fellow  as  wide  awake  as  you  are." 

I  had  now  ascertained  all  that  was  needful — so  I  returned 
to  my  boat,  which  had  lain  snug  under  the  bushes,  about 
half-way  down  the  channel.  As  the  Englishman's  guns  com- 
manded the  whole  of  it,  we  were  obliged  to  unship  our  oars, 
and  scull  up  stream,  keeping  well  under  the  banks — and  it 
was  well  we  did  so,  for  just  before  we  reached  the  angle  in 
the  river,  we  carelessly  shot  into  the  middle  of  the  stream, 
when,  quicker  than  thought,  six  thirty-two  pound  shot  whis- 
tled over  our  heads,  followed  by  a  roar  of  genuine  English 
thunder.  We  were  not  desirous  of  any  more  such,  and 
took  to  our  oars  :  giving  way  strongly  we  doubled  the  point 
just  as  six  more  round  shot  kicked  up  the  water  astern  of 
us. 

"  Pretty  good  gunnery,  Mr.  Bull,"  thought  I,  as  I  pulled 
alongside  the  brig,  and  made  report  to  Seymour.  "  I  have 
no  desire  to  play  at  short  bowls  with  you." 

I  had  scarcely  gained  the  vessel,  when  the  Englishman 
began  to  fire  his  stern-chasers,  one  a  minute,  up  the  channel, 
and  the  thirty-two  pound  shot  skipped  along  over  the  water, 
and  dashed  through  the  forest,  knocking  trees  and  earth 
about  in  every  direction — and,  of  course,  completely  com- 
manding the  whole  length  of  the  channel.  We  were  at  first 
at  a  loss  for  the  reason  of  this  firing,  but  when  night  came 
on,  and  a  palpable  darkness  fell  upon  us,  and  the  English- 
man commenced  a  rapid  fire  of  round-shot,  grape  and  can- 
nister,  we  knew  at  once  that  his  object  was  to  prevent  our 
playing  any  "  Yankee  shine  "  upon  him.  He  had  obtained 
the  proper  range  before  dark,  and  as  his  shot  swept  the 
eastern  channel,  we  were  glad  to  keep  very  clear  of  it. 

About  midnight,  however,  Seymour  determined  to  try  his 


30  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 


hand  at  the  game,  and  ordered  me  to  take  fifty  men,  armed 
with  cutlasses,  pistols  and  muskets,  and  go  down  through 
the  woods  as  near  to  the  Englishman  as  was  prudent,  and 
then  sweep  his  decks  with  musketry.  Being  landed  on  the 
left  bank  of  the  river,  we  silently  wound  our  way  through 
the  forest,  and  approached  to  within  half-musket  shot  of 
him  unheard,  and  each  taking  a  tree  for  a  screen,  according 
to  old  Kentuck  principles,  we  opened  upon  him  in  fine  style, 
directed  by  the  flash  of  his  stern-chasers,  with  which  he  was 
still  sweeping  the  channel.  Although  the  Englishman  was 
evidently  surprised  by  our  sudden  attack,  he  took  it  very 
coolly,  and  without  knocking  off  from  his  stern-chasers  a 
moment,  the  marines  and  small-arm-men  were  summoned  to 
their  stations,  according  to  the  regular  routine  of  nautical 
war,  and  in  five  minutes  his  ship  was  one  entire  blaze  of 
musketry,  fore  and  aft.  Here,  however,  we  had  all  the 
advantage,  being  considerably  elevated,  and  entirely  pro- 
tected by  the  trees  ;  the  flashes  of  our  guns  (their  only 
guide)  were  of  course  small,  but  the  broad  sheets  of  flame 
from  her  stern-chasers  completely  illuminated  her  deck, 
affording  us  every  facility  for  accurate  shooting. 

The  Englishman  soon  found  that  this  method  of  proce- 
dure would  not  do,  but  from  our  peculiar  situation  it  was 
somewhat  difficult  to  tell  what  would  do.  The  banks  of 
the  channel  were  quite  bold,  rising  at  an  angle  of  sixty  de- 
grees, and  the  place  we  occupied  was  so  much  elevated,  that 
the  guns  of  her  larboard  battery  could  not  be  brought  to 
bear  upon  us  at  all.  While  I  was  congratulating  myself  on 
the  advantage  we  evidently  had  over  them,  their  fire  of  mus- 
ketry, which  had  been  unintermitted,  suddenly  ceased — and 
the  next  instant  a  lot  of  thirty-two  pound  shot  were  tossed 
at  us,  informing  us  that  John  Bull  had  slewed  round  his 
starboard  spar-deck  battery.  This,  however,  did  not  annoy 
me  at  all — for  carronades  are  clumsy  things,  and  their  shot 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  31 

never  hit  "once  in  a  place,"  and  moreover,  are  thrown  with 
so  little  force,  that  a  fellow  with  stout  ribs  may  laugh  at 
them.  Finding  that  this  did  not  trouble  us,  they  changed 
to  grape  and  cannister — but  we,  still  protected  by  our  trees, 
kept  up  our  fire,  not  being  so  easily  scared. 

When  the  failure  of  this  experiment  became  apparent, 
the  increased  bustle  on  the  Englishman's  decks  showed  that 
now  he  was  going  about  flogging  us  according  to  science — 
and  a  few  minutes  after,  his  stern-chasers,  which  till  now 
had  been  steadily  sweeping  the  channel,  suddenly  ceased 
firing.  Thinking  that  something  new  was  coming,  I  gave 
orders  to  change  ground  ;  and  the  word  being  silently  pass- 
ed from  one  to  another,  we  moved  a  couple  of  hundred 
yards  to  the  eastward-— and  it  was  well  we  did  so,  for  the 
next  instant,  fire-balls  were  thrown  by  the  dozens  into  our 
former  ground,  followed  by  a  shower  of  round,  grape  and 
cannister,  from  the  long  thirty- two  pound  stern-chasers, 
which  kicked  up  a  row  among  the  trees  in  fine  style.  An 
instant  after,  a  few  dozen  of  Congreve  rockets  were  thrown 
into  the  bushes  in  every  direction,  and  some  of  them  chanc- 
ing to  alight  in  our  vicinity,  dispelled  my  doubts  as  to  the 
propriety  of  a  retreat  ;  so,  instantly  tacking  ship,  we  were 
off  at  ten  knots  an  hour. 

"  Well,  Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  when  I  had  reported 
progress  on  board,  "  it  is  very  plain  that  this  Englishman 
won't  budge  tack  nor  sheet  for  all  we  can  do  :  so,  since  he 
won't  go  away,  we  must.  I  shall  go  to  sea  to-day  in  spite 
of  everything — therefore  make  your  will,  and  holy-stone 
your  conscience — for  though  I  shall  certainly  succeed,  who 
will  live  to  tell  of  it,  is  another  question.  We  must  get  the 
rest  of  our  cargo  elsewhere,  for  we  are  not  more  than  two- 
thirds  full." 

I  admired  Seymour's  resolution  ;  but  although  he  had 
heretofore  been  astonishingly  successful,  I  did  not  think 


32  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;   OR, 

that  this  plan  was  among  the  possibilities,  and  began  to 
cudgel  invention  for  a  yarn  to  spin  in  case  of  a  capture. 
Now,  for  the  first  time,  I  began  to  have  some  compunctious 
visitings  as  to  the  lawfulness  of  my  present  employment,  and 
I  began  to  debate  with  myself  how  far  my  forcible  entry 
into  the  trade  would  excuse  my  remaining  in  it — and  finally 
came  to  the  conclusion,  as  most  men  would,  to  stand  by  and 
see  what  would  turn  up. 

When  the  day  dawned,  the  English  ceased  firing,  and 
were  evidently  waiting  for  some  of  their  small  craft  to  arrive, 
so  that  they  could  come  up  and  attack  us  on  terms  of  equal- 
ity— knowing  full  well  that  to  attempt  to  carry  us  in  boats 
would  be  madness.  All  the  morning,  business  went  on  as 
usual,  and,  except  receiving  slaves  on  board,  we  made  no 
apparent  preparation  for  sea,  lest  the  English  should  learn 
it  from  the  natives,  who  we  well  knew  always  served  the 
strongest  party.  But  in  reality,  every  preparation  was  made, 
and  by  four  bells  in  the  forenoon  watch  we  were  completely 
ready  for  sea. 

At  seven  bells,  (half-past  eleven,)  Seymour,  who  had  been 
ashore,  deliberately  returned  aboard. 

"Mr.  Carline,"  said  he  to  the  second  lieutenant,  "jump 
into  that  canoe  alongside,  with  a  couple  of  men,  and  pull  to 
the  turn  in  the  river.  Wave  your  handkerchief  when  the 
English  liner  pipes  to  dinner,  and  then  pull  for  us.  Mr. 
Garnet,  hoist  in  all  the  boats,  and  stow  the  quarter-boats 
amid-ships  in  the  launch,  instead  of  running  them  up  the 
davits." 

"Now,  sir,"  said  Seymour,  "pipe  down  hammocks." 

"  Down  hammocks,  indeed,"  thought  I,  as  I  repeated  the 
order  ;  "  pretty  well  done  for  seven  bells,  A.  M.  Captain 
Seymour,"  said  I,  "it  strikes  me  you  are  getting  sleepy." 

"  You  will  find  I  am  wide  awake,  I  guess,"  replied  Sey- 
mour. "  Now  then,  John  Garnet,  uushackle  the  cable  abaft 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  33 

the  bitts,  and  stand  by  to  slip  it.  Loose  all  sail,  and  hoist 
away  everything.  Brace  up  sharp  on  the  larboard  tack. 
Man  sheets  and  tacks,  and  stand  by  to  sheet  home.  Clear 
away  both  batteries,  and  run  them  in," — the  guns  were 
double  shotted  with  grape  and  cannister — "  and  now,  Mr. 
Garnet,  we  are  ready  to  run  ly  them." 

11  The-e-e  devil!"  said  I,  as  I  walked  away,  thunderstruck 
at  the  madness  of  his  plan  ;  "hark  you,  Captain  Seymour, 
if  that's  your  scheme,  we  are  candidates  for  immortality  as 
true  as  I  am  a  sinner." 

"  Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  angrily,  "  I  beg  you  will 
remember  that  I  command  this  vessel." 

"  Ay,"  said  I,  "  and  you  will  please  to  remember  that  I  am 
a  pressed  man.  But  this  is  no  time  for  quarrelling,  so  we'll 
be  friends  for  the  present.  By  and  by,  I  promise  myself 
the  gratification  of  shooting  you  at  ten  paces." 

"  Do,"  he  replied,  coolly. 

The  wind  was  now  blowing  fresh  from  the  northeast — the 
tide  was  running  down  at  four  knots — and  we  rode  head  to 
the  wind  by  the  larboard-bower,  with  a  kedge  astern. 
Seymour  stood  upon  the  poop,  watch  in  hand. 

"  It  keeps  English  time,"  said  he,  "for  I  set  it  by  their 
bell  this  morning.  It  now  wants  one  minute  of  twelve. 
Mr.  Garnet,  slip  the  chain-cable — we'll  ride  by  the  kedge." 

It  was  slipped  accordingly,  and  the  brig  swinging  around, 
was  brought  up  by  the  kedge,  though  it  seemed  as  if  the 
hawser  would  part  with  the  strain.  A  carpenter's  mate 
stood  by,  axe  in  hand,  ready  to  cut,  and  Seymour  watched 
Carline  for  the  signal.  An  instant  after,  he  waved  his 
handkerchief,  and  struck  out  for  us. 

"  Sheet  home  ! — cut  away  !"  shouted  Seymour. 

It  was  done — in  an  instant  we  were,  under  way — and 
Carline  and  his  men  jumped  aboard,  leaving  the  canoe 
adrift. 

2* 


34  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"Now,"  said  Seymour,  "go  below,  every  man  of  you, 
except  those  at  the  wheel,  and  stay  there  till  you  are  called. 
I  will  shoot  the  first  man  that  puts  his  head  above  the 
combings  of  the  hatches.  Mr.  Garnet,  you  had  better  go 
below,  too — you  can  do  nothing  on  deck." 

"  I  am  greatly  obliged  to  you,  sir,"  said  I,  "  but  I'll  stay 
on  deck  and  see  the  fun." 

We  shortly  doubled  the  point,  and  with  wind  and  tide, 
shot  rapidly  down  the  stream.  We  were  not  observed,  and 
approached  nearer  and  nearer  to  the  liner,  undiscovered, 
until  our  flying  jib-boom  was  nearly  over  her  taffrail. 

"  Port  I"  whispered  Seymour. 

The  helm  was  shifted  accordingly,  and  we  passed  the 
starboard  side  of  the  seventy-four  so  closely,  that  her  main- 
deck  battery  swept  our  larboard-hammock-netting  off  clear, 
while  our  starboard  bulwarks  almost  touched  the  bank  of 
the  river.  Knocking  the  ashes  from  the  cigar  which  was 
accidentally  in  my  mouth,  I,  fired  the  aftermost  gun  of  the 
larboard  battery  plump  into  the  liner,  just  as  her  crew, 
aroused  by  the  collision,  dropped  their  cans — it  being  grog- 
time — manned  their  starboard  battery,  and  let  drive. 
They  were  a  little  behind  time,  however,  for  we  had  that 
instant  shot  past  them,  and  all  their  guns  threw  their  iron 
harmlessly  astern  of  us,  while  we,  doubling  the  point,  were 
soon  out  of  their  reach. 

"All  hands  make  sail  1"  shouted  Seymour;  "round  in 
the  larboard-braces.  Stand  by  the  starboard  studdin'- 
sails." 

With  such  government,  we  were  under  all  sail  in  less  than 
no  time,  and  with  studdin'-sails,  and  sky-sails,  the  wind  on 
the  starboard-quarter,  we  dashed  down  the  bay. 

"  Pretty  well  done,  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I ;  "  but  you 
are  not  safe  yet.  Do  you  hear  that  ?" 

The  English  frigates,  awakened  by  the  liner's  broadside, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  35 

were  beating  to  quarters,  and  as  they  lay  across  the  chan- 
nel, on  each  side  of  the  mouth  of  the  bay,  I  thought  our 
final  escape  was  yet  a  question.  Not  so,  Seymour — for, 
rubbing  his  hands  in  irrepressible  glee,  he  walked  about  the 
poop,  giving  his  orders,  almost  beside  himself  with  joy. 

"Hillo,  signal-quartermaster  !"  said  he — we  won't  mince 
matters  !  send  up  our  black  ensign  at  the  main.  We'll 
give  Johnny  Bull  a  target  for  his  shot." 

The  words  were  scarcely  out  of  his  mouth,  when  a  storm 
of  iron  rushed  past  us,  and  looking  astern,  we  saw  that  the 
liner,  having  slipped  her  cables  and  fired  a  broadside,  was 
coming  after  us,  making  all  sail. 

"  Yery  good  oysters,"  said  Seymour,  with  a  grimace  that 
a  baboon  might  have  envied :  "  Mr.  Garnet,  poke  at  him 
with  our  stern-chasers,  and  make  him  a  'candidate  for 
immortality/  while  I  try  my  hand  at  guessing  with  these 
fellows  ahead." 

We  acccordingly  blazed  away  with  our  stern-chasers,  to 
injure  him  if  possible,  and  to  cover  ourselves  with  smoke. 
We  soon  reached  the  mouth  of  the  bay,  and  just  before  we 
passed  the  points  which  would  bring  us  within  range  of  the 
frigates,  Seymour  sang  out : 

"  Man  both  batteries  !  Straight  as  you  go,  quarter- 
master." 

We  passed  the  capes,  steering  right  on  for  the  reef, 
which,  as  I  have  already  mentioned,  ran  across  the  mouth 
of  the  bay — and  as  soon  as  our  guns  came  to  bear,  we  gave 
each  frigate  a  broadside,  and  our  aim  being  true,  and  the 
guns  double-shotted,  they  made  a  crashing.  They  reserved 
their  fire,  thinking  that  we  should  be  obliged  to  pass  near 
one  or  the  other,  and  they  would  then  give  it  to  us  solidly. 

We  continued  our  fire ;  and  Seymour,  standing  upon 
the  pjoop,  began  to  cun  the  brig  himself;  and  although 
the  smoke  was  so  dense  that  we  could  not  see  a  fathom, 


36  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

gave  his  orders  as  promptly  as  if  it  were  clear  day  and  plain 
channel. 

"  Blaze  away,  my  lads,"  said  he,  "we'll  do  Johnny  Bull, 
all  we  can." 

An  instant  after  he  song  out : 
"  Knock  off  firing  !     Hold  on,  everybody  !" 
The  order  was  obeyed,  and  the  next  moment  we  struck 
heavily  on  the  reef. 

"  Yery  good,"  said  Seymour  ;  "  once  more,  you  beauty." 
We  struck  again,  and  then  slipped  over  the  reef  into 
deep  water. 

"All  hands  cheer  ship  !"  he  shouted.  We  sent  up  the 
English  ensign  at  the  fore,  gave  it  three  cheers,  and  went 
on  our  course  under  all  sail.  The  English  could  not  follow 
us  over  the  reef,  as  they  drew  too  much  water ;  but  they 
slipped  their  cables,  fired  their  broadsides  at  us  in  spite, 
and  then  stood  through  the  channel ;  but  before  they  were 
clear  of  it,  we  were  hull-down  in  the  southwest. 

Take  it  as  a  whole,  our  escape  was  really  a  masterpiece 
of  daring  and  nautical  skill.  It  required  the  mind  of  a  man 
to  conceive  the  plan  of  running  past  a  line-of-battle-ship  in 
broad  daylight  and  in  such  a  channel,  and  indomitable  reso- 
lution to  put  that  plan  into  effect ;  for  had  we  been  discov- 
ered tiro  minutes  sooner,  one  broadside  would  have  totally 
annihilated  us.  The  attempt  was  made  when  the  English 
piped  to  dinner  and  grog,  because  they  would  naturally 
be  remiss  in  their  look-ont  at  this  time — thinking  more  of 
the  grog-tub  than  of  us.  Hammocks  were  piped  down, 
because  Seymour  knew  that  the  liner's  main  deckers  would 
just  sweep  the  netting.  Yards  were  braced  sharp,  because, 
if  square,  they  would  lock  in  the  Englishman's  rigging. 
Boats  were  stowed  amidships,  because  there  was  no  room 
for  them  on  the  quarter.  Guns  were  run  in  for  the  -same 
reason  j  and,  after  crossing  the  bay,  he  steered  over  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  37 

reef,  knowing  that  there  was  one  place  where  we  should 
tonch-and-go  without  injury.  Such  seamanship  deserved 
success — whatever  were  the  cause — and  obtained  it ;  for  at 
sunset  we  were  clear  of  land,  and  the  English  fleet  was  out 
of  sight  astern. 

"Mr.  Garnet/7  said  Seymour,  as  soon  as  it  was  dark, 
"  we'll  haul  our  wind,  and  stand  southeast  for  the  land, 
because  I  have  no  idea  of  going  to  Brazil  half-loaded." 

We  altered  our  course  accordingly,  and  stood  for  the- 
shore.  The  former  part  of  the  night  was  quite  dark,  but 
about  four  bells  in  the  mid-watch  it  cleared  up  a  little.  I 
was  accidentally  on  deck  at  the  time,  and,  sweeping  the 
horizon  with  my  night-glass,  I  discovered  a  strange  sail  on 
the  starboard  bow,  distant  about  three  miles.  Reporting 
it  to  Seymour,  I  received  orders  to  give  chase,  and  putting 
up  the  helm,  and  crowding  all  sail,  we  were  after  her  as  fast 
as  a  six-knot  breeze  would  carry  us.  The  stranger,  perceiv- 
ing us,  made  all  sail  to  escape,  but  it  was  in  vain — for  at 
daylight,  we  were  within  half  a  mile.  She  was  evidently  a 
Guineaman,  being  a  long,  low,  suspicious-looking  schooner, 
and  we  ranged  up  within  pistol-shot  without  firing  a  gun, 
so  that  we  could  not  break  any  of  her  crockery,  and  ordered 
her  captain  to  come  on  board.  He  came  accordingly,  and 
Seymour,  receiving  him  on  the  quarter-deck,  being  moved 
by  virtuous  indignation  no  doubt,  began  to  read  him  a  furi- 
ous lecture  on  the  enormities  of  the  slave-trade. 

"  Why,"  said  he  in  astonishment,  pointing  to  the  woolly 
pates  lying  about  our  decks,  "  you  are  a  slaver,  too." 

But  Seymour  only  lectured  the  harder,  and  wound  up  as 
regular-built  a  preachment  as  any  chaplain  ever  spun,  by 
ordering  him,  at  his  peril,  to  send  all  his  slaves  on  board  of 
us  instantly.  He  did  not  dare  to  disobey  ;  and,  when  the 
transfer  was  completed,  Seymour  quietly  said  to  him  : 

"  Now,  sir,  you  may  go  back  to  Africa,  and  get  as  many 


38  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

more  as  you  like,  for  these  just  complete  my  cargo.  There, 
Mr.  Garnet,"  he  continued,  as  we  filled  and  stood  away  to 
the  westward,  "  that's  what  we  slavers  call  borrowing." 

Having  nothing  now  to  detain  us,  we  cracked  away  mer- 
rily for  the  southward  and  westward,  and  about  noon  of  the 
eighteenth  day  after  leaving  the  coast  of  Guinea,  the  look- 
out aloft  reported  a  sail  on  the  starboard  bow.  The  wind 
being  the  south-east  trade,  and  blowing  fresh,  we  instantly 
up-helm,  made  all  sail,  and  gave  chase,  and  by  four  bells  in 
the  afternoon  watch,  we  could  see  with  our  glasses  that  she 
was  a  large  ship  on  the  larboard  tack,  heading  west,  and 
sailing  lazily  along  under  topsails  and  coursers.  One  thing 
was  very  plain  :  the  stranger  was  in  no  kind  of  haste,  and 
being  led  by  this  fact  to  examine  her  more  closely,  I  became 
convinced  she  was  a  man-of-war,  and  accordingly  remarked 
to  Seymour,  that  perhaps  she  would  be  a  Scotch  prize. 

But  he  replied,  that  having  the  weather-gage,  we  could 
sail  as  near  as  we  liked  with  perfect  safefy,  and  therefore 
cracked  away.  As  we  sailed  very  fast,  we  were  within  four 
or  fiv^-miles  of  'her  at  seven  bells  in  the  afternoon  watch, 
and  then  saw  plainly  that  she  was  a  frigate.  She  showed 
English  colors,  and  fired  a  gun  to  attract  our  observation  ; 
but  we  took  no  notice  of  either. 

"  Mr.  Garnet,"  said  Seymour,  "  I  believe  that  is  one  of 
the  English  frigates  we  choused  so  neatly  a  fortnight  since, 
and  we'll  run  down  to  them,  so  that  we  may  know  them, 
and  they  us." 

We  accordingly  approached  within  two  miles  of  her, 
keeping  well  to  windward,  and  then  fired  our  long  forty-two 
at  her,  and  sent  up  our  black  flag  at  the  main.  That 
rather  provoked  Mr.  Bull,  the  shot  happening  to  hit  him  ; 
and  he  let  drive  at  us  the  whole  of  his  larboard  battery, 
hauled  close  on  the  wind  on  the  larboard  tack,  and,  as 
quick  as  thought  was  under  all  sail.  His  shot  did  us  no 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  39 

essential  harm,  and  giving  him  our  starboard  battery  in 
return,  we  changed  our  course  from  west  to  southwest, 
crowded  everything  and  ran  across  his  fore-foot  unhurt. 
He  instantly  up-helm  and  gave  chase,  and  the  breeze 
being  a  stiff  one,  we  were  both  off  at  a  fine  rate.  For  two 
hours  he  lost  considerably,  but  about  sunset  it  began  to 
breeze  up  and  threaten  a  gale. 

"  Now,  Captain  Seymour,"  said  I,  "  you  understand  we 
shall  catch  a  gale  of  wind  shortly,  and  the  English  being 
the  heaviest,  will  catch  us." 

11  Don't  chuckle  too  soon,  Lieutenat  Garnet,"  he  replied, 
"  we'll  escape  this  fellow  easy  enough." 

"  That  remains  to  be  seen,"  was  my  brief  rejoinder,  as  I 
squinted  to  windward. 

The  wind  now  increased  rapidly — so  much  so,  indeed, 
that  at  eight  bells  in  the  second  dog-watch,  we  were  obliged 
to  take  in  all  our  studdin'-sails — but  the  Englishman  kept 
his  fast,  and,  although  eight  or  nine  miles  astern,  evidently 
gained  on  us.  Seymour,  however,  was  not  at  all  disturbed, 
but  gave  orders  and  cracked  jokes  as  cheerfully  as  ever. 
With  the  gale,  clouds  came  on,  and  it  grew  quite  dark ; 
not  so  much  so,  however,  as  to  prevent  our  seeing  each 
other,  while  we  cracked  on,  shortening  sail  only  when  abso- 
lutely necessary,  as  the  English  gained  upon  us  slowly,  but 
surely. 

About  midnight,  Seymour,  who  had  been  coolly  walking 
about  the  poop,  suddenly  stopped,  and  after  thinking  a 
moment,  ordered  a  reefer  to  call  the  master. 

"  Mr.  Quadrant,"  said  Seymour,  as  soon  as  he  came  upon 
deck,  "work  up  your  reckoning,  and  tell  me  where  we  are 
now,  and  bear  a  hand  about  it." 

Quadrant  dived,  and  in  an  instant  returning,  said  : 

"By  dead  reckoning,  sir,  we  are  now  in  latitude  208 
25  N.f  longitude  289  12  W.,  standing  west-by-south." 


40  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  Bring  me  the  chart,"  said  Seymour.  It  was  brought, 
and  after  studying  it  a  moment,  he  threw  it  by,  and  said  to 
me : 

"  Mr.  Garnet,  we  are  not  far  from  Martin  Yas  and  Trini- 
dad. Take  your  post,  sir,  on  the  to'-gallant  forecastle,  and 
keep  a  bright  look-out  ahead.  If  you  see  anything  or  think 
you  see  anything,  sing  out  to  the  wheel,  and  men  whom  I 
shall  station  along  the  gangway  will  pass  the  word." 

I  took  my  place,  accordingly,  and  "gazed  into  dim  futu- 
rity." Martin  Yas  and  Trinidad  are  two  small  islands  in 
the  South  Atlantic,  not  far  from  the  coast  of  Brazil,  which 
rise  precipitously  from  the  sea  to  the  height  of  three  or 
four  hundred  feet,  nearly  or  totally  inaccessible.  They  are 
both  quite  small — the  larger  not  exceeding  five  hundred 
yards  across — and  this  fact,  added  to  their  abrupt  sides, 
has  entirely  preserved  them  from  the  polluting  tread  of  man. 
Here,  in  the  solemn  solitudes  of  the  ocean,  they  silently  sit, 
uninhabited  and  alone.  Ages  upon  ages  have  rolled  over 
them,  and  they  are  still  the  same  as  on  that  day  when  the 
morning  stars  sang  together,  and  the  sons  of  God  shouted 
for  joy  in  view  of  the  fair  handiwork  of  the  Almighty. 
The  ocean,  lashed  into  fury  by  ten  thousand  tempests,  has 
dashed  against  their  rocky  bulwarks  in  impotent  wrath — 
for  they  stand  "  steadfast  and  sure  :"  far  removed  from  the 
noise  and  turmoil  of  man,  clothed  in  quietness,  they  slum- 
ber on,  lulled  by  the  murmurs  of  the  deep.  Confident  in 
their  rocky  foundations,  they  laugh  at  the  roar  of  the 
storms.  Though  the  waters  of  the  troubled  sea  chafe  their 
sides,  their  summits  are  visited  only  by  the  pure  radiance  ot 
the  luminaries  of  heaven. 

The  water  does  not  shoal  as  you  approach  them,  and 
being  composed  of  dark  rock,  there  is  nothing  about  them 
to  warn  the  careless  mariner  of  his  danger.  Hence  our 
unusual  caution. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  41 

"  How  far  astern  are  the  English  now  ?"  I  inquired, 
about  four  bells  in  the  mid-watch.  The  man  passed  aft, 
and  returning,  said — "  About  a  mile,  sir." 

As  the  wind  now  blew  a  gale,  this  was  as  I  expected — 
and  shrugging  my  shoulders  at  the  prospect  astern,  I  turned 
my  attention  to  the  prospects  ahead.  It  had  become  quite 
dark;  I  could  scarcely  see  at  all,  and  was  about  to  relin- 
quish my  look-out  as  useless,  when  I  saw  ahead  the  dim 
outline  of  an  object  resembling  a  large  ship  before  the  wind. 

"  Mr,  Jones,'7  said  I  to  a  reefer  near  me,  "  go  aft,  sir, 
and  report  to  Captain  Seymour  a  sail  right  ahead,  and  be 
quiet  about  it." 

Seymour  came  forward,  and  after  looking  a  moment,  said  : 

"  Mr.  Garnet,  that  is  not  a  sail ;  it  is  the  bluff  which 
rises  from  the  sea  half-way  between  Martin  Yas  and  Trini- 
dad. It  is  nearly  two  hundred  feet  in  height,  entirely 
precipitous  on  every  side,  not  more  than  a  hundred  feet  in 
diameter  at  the  base,  and  slightly  conical.  That  is  what 
you  suppose  to  be  a  ship,  and  in  the  dark  it  might  readily 
be  mistaken  for  one  ;  and,  if  we  manoeuvre  rightly,  it  will 
insure  our  escape,  and  put  a  stop  to  our  pursuers." 

He  then  proceeded  to  give  me  my  orders,  and  returned  to 
his  station  upon  the  poop. 

"  Starboard  a  little  !"  was  my  first  hail  to  the  wheel.  It 
was  obeyed,  and  produced  just  enough  alteration  in  our 
course  to  bring  the  bluff  one  point  on  our  starboard-bow, 
which,  wishing  to  screen  it  from  the  view  of  the  English, 
was  just  what  was  wanted.  When  very  near  the  island — 
distant,  say,  two  hundred  yards,  just  as  I  had  repeated  my 
order  to  the  wheel — the  English  frigate,  being  only  a  quar- 
ter of  a  mile  astern,  fell  off  a  point  or  two  from  the  wind, 
and  a  thirty-two  pound  shot,  from  her  bow-chaser,  carried 
away  our  main-topmast.  This  accident,  apparently  so  dis- 
astrous, was  our  salvation. 


42  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Starboard  a  little,"  I  repeated. 

We  were  now  about  a  ship's  length  from  the  island,  and 
the  English  not  more  than  three  or  four  astern.  At  this 
instant  they  fired  at  us  again.  The  shot  raked  us  fore  and 
aft,  but  it  was  their  destruction.  Their  vision  was  obscured 
by  its  smoke,  which  caused  them  to  mistake  the  island  for 
us,  and  a  loud  voice  from  the  Englishman's  forecastle,  which 
we  knew  to  be  that  of  her  first-lieutenant,  hailed  : 

"  Port  the  helm  !    We'll  run  her  down  !" 

We  slipped  past  the  pillar-island  so  closely,  that  our  star- 
board main-yard-arm  grazed  its  precipitous  side,  and  the 
next  instant  the  Englishman's  flying-jib-boom,  jib-boom  and 
bowsprit  successively  struck  against  the  immovable  rock, 
and  were  driven  in  upon  the  hull  by  the  violence  of  the  col- 
lision. A  moment  more,  and  the  hull  itself  dashed  against 
the  fatal  barrier,  crushing  her  bulwarks  and  making  a  fear- 
ful breach  for  the  entering  Vaves.  A  frigate,  however,  is 
too  substantial  a  craft  to  be  destroyed  by,  perhaps,  any 
one  blow  that  she  can  receive  ;  and,  in  this  instance,  the 
strength  of  her  bows  sufficed  to  resist  instantaneous  de- 
struction. She  recoiled,  accordingly,  a  few  fathoms,  and 
her  first-lieutenant,  in  terror,  shouted  : 

"  Starboard- the-helm  ! — hard-a-starboard  !" 

It  was  too  late  !  Recovering  from  the  recoil  of  the  first 
shock,  the  frigate  struck  again  so  violently,  that  her  bow 
was  totally  demolished.  Meanwhile  we  had  hove  to,  and 
now  could  hear  the  water  rush  into  our  antagonist  with  a 
roar,  which  plainly  showed  that  her  last  hour  was  come. 
She  rolled  heavily  to  windward  once,  and  then  went  down  ; 
and  her  crew  heard,  amid  the  roar  of  the  tempest,  the 
cheers  which  Seymour,  with  his  usual  cold-blooded  ferocity, 
ordered  our  crew  to  give  them,  sounding  in  their  ears  like 
the  laugh  of  the  fiends  of  hell  I 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  43 


CHAPTER     III. 

THE  gale  had  now  abated,  and  we,  having  repaired  dam- 
ages, and  rigged  new  spars  aloft,  crowded  all  sail  for  the 
westward  and  southward,  and  at  noon  of  the  fourth  day,  with 
Spanish  colors  at  the  peak,  we  entered  the  harbor  of  Rio 
Janeiro. 

As  we  neared  the  anchorage  of  men-of-war,  I  observed 
among  them  the  United  States  frigate  Constellation,  (the 
one  with  which  we  had  a  brush  in  leaving  New- York,)  and 
perceiving,  as  we  approached,  that  her  quarter-deck  was 
crowded  with  officers,  Seymour  altered  our  course  so  as  to 
pass  across  her  stern — as  we  were  now  in  a  neutral  port,  and 
had  nothing  to  fear  from  her.  Commodore  Montague  was 
standing  upon  the  signal-locker,  and  as  we  passed  under 
her  stern,  Seymour,  pointing  to  the  slaves  who  were  lying 
about  our  decks,  hailed  him  with  : 

"  Friend  Montague,  I'll  pick  out  a  dozen  of  the  prettiest, 
and  send  them  aboard  of  you,  shortly,  for  your  own  pecu- 
liar." 

It  was  beneath  the  dignity  of  a  Captain  of  the  United 
States  Navy  to  bandy  defiances,  or  deal  in  blackguardism, 
with  a  slaver — and,  accordingly,  Montague  pretended  not 
to  hear  what  Seymour  said — but  the  blood  mounting  in  his 
face,  showed  plainly  that  the  taunt  was  heard,  and  felt.  To 
carry  out  his  system  of  bravado,  Seymour  ordered  to  let  go 
the  anchor,  about  three  hundred  yards  from  the  Constella- 
tion, and  veering  away  cable,  we  lay  precisely  parallel  to 
her,  broadside  to  broadside.  The  weather  now  being  aw- 
fully hot,  we  were  of  course  desirous  to  land  our  slaves  as 
quickly  as  possible,  and  having  made  the  necessary  arrange- 
ments with  the  authorities  of  the  port,  we  commenced  dis- 
charging cargo  at  four  P.M.,  and  used  such  dispatch,  that 


44  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

before  seven  that  evening,  not  one  remained  on  board.  This 
operation  being  completed,  Seymour  turned  his  attention  to 
his  small  warfare  with  the  Constellation,  and  mustering  our 
band — a  strong  one  by  the  way — upon  the  poop,  he  saluted 
Montague's  ears  with  "  Hail  Columbia"  and  "  Yankee  Doo- 
dle"— and  when  eight-bells  came,  it  was  "made"  in  true 
man-o'-war  style — two  eighteen-pounders,  and  a  full  band, 
announcing  to  all  in  port  in  general,  and  the  Constellation 
in  particular,  that  our  watch  was  set. 

The  next  morning,  about  ten  o'clock,  having  performed 
my  usual  duties,  I  went  down  into  the  ward-room,  and 
shortly  reappeared  on  deck  in  the  same  dress  I  wore  the 
day  we  left  New  York. 

"What  now,  Mr.  Garnet?"  said  Seymour,  in  surprise, 
as  I  walked  aft  upon  the  poop. 

"  I  come,  sir,  to  request  a  boat,"  I  replied. 

"As  first  lieutenant  of  this  vessel,  sir,"  answered  Sey- 
mour, still  more  surprised,  "  you  need  not  ask  that  as  a 
favor.  It  is  your  right." 

" I  hold  rank  here  no  longer,  sir,"  said  I ;  "I  was  kid- 
napped by  you,  and  have  participated  in  your  infamous 
atrocities  thus  long,  only  because  I  have  had  no  opportunity 
to  leave  you.  While  you  were  in  danger  and  difficulty,  I 
scorned  to  quit  you :  it  would  have  seemed  like  fear,  to 
which  I  am  a  stranger.  But  now,  assuring  you  that  a  viler 
scoundrel  than  yourself  never  crossed  my  hawse,  I  inform 
you  that  I  am  about  to  surrender  myself  to  Commodore 
Montague  aboard  the  Constellation." 

"  My  respects  and  a  pleasant  voyage  to  you,  sir,"  said 
Seymour — for  he  saw  it  was  useless  to  remonstrate,  and  his 
pride  was  mortally  piqued  at  my  unexpected  personal  denun- 
ciation— "  boatswain's-mate,  call  away  the  first-cutter.  I 
hope,  sir,  you  will  do  me  the  favor  to  take  your  pay,  due 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  45 

for  services  rendered.  Sam,  (to  his  steward,)  bring  me  a 
bag  of  guineas." 

Not  being  disposed  to  prolong  the  interview,  or  accept 
his  offer,  I  walked  to  the  starboard  gangway  without  reply, 
and  entering  the  first-cutter,  pulled  for  the  Constellation. 
The  moment  I  reached  her  deck,  I  ordered  the  boat  to 
shove  off  and  return  to  the  brig,  and  then  walked  aft  to 
meet  the  commodore. 

I  proceeded  at  once  to  detail  my  adventures,  so  far  as  was 
necessary  to  explain  my  appearance  in  his  vessel,  and  con- 
cluded by  surrendering  myself  a  prisoner.  He  heard  me 
through,  patiently  and  courteously,  and  then,  pursuing  his 
own  investigation,  inquired  the  particulars  of  Seymour's 
conduct  and  cruise.  When  I  had  finished  a  brief  sketch  of 
the  same,  he  abruptly  asked  if  all  her  slaves  were  then 
ashore,  and  all  hands,  and  Seymour,  aboard.  I  told  him 
they  were. 

"Mr.  Roberts,"  said  he,  to  his  fourth  lieutenant,  "take 
ten  men,  and  board  the  ship  which  has  just  anchored  be- 
tween us  and  the  slaver  :  she  has  a  long  range  of  cable  out : 
present  my  respects  to  her  commander,  and  request  him  to 
heave-short ;  assist  him  with  your  men,  and  remain  on  board 
of  her  till  recalled.  Mr.  Thompson,  (first  lieutenant,)  clear 
away  and  man  the  starboard-battery — load  with  round, 
grape  and  cannister,  and  order  the  gunner  to  open  the 
magazine,  and  stand  by  to  pass  up  powder." 

By  the  time  these  orders  were  obeyed,  the  merchantman 
had  hove-short,  and  the  brig  lay  exposed  to  view. 

"  Take  good  aim,  my  lads,"  said  Montague,  "at  the  slaver. 
All  ready.  Fire  !" 

At  the  word,  the  whole  of  the  Constellation's  starboard 
broadside  was  poured  into  the  brig,  tearing  open  her  bul- 
warks, and  dismounting  her  guns.  For  five  minutes,  the 


46  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA,    ETC. 

frigate  continued  a  most  terrible  battery,  and  Montague 
then  perceiving  that  the  brig  was  a  total  wreck,  ceased 
firing,  and  ordered  the  boats  to  be  manned  to  board  her. 
As  the  men  were  jumping  into  the  boats,  I  observed  that 
the  brig  was  evidently  beginning  to  sink,  and  was  commu- 
nicating that  fact  to  an  officer  near  me,  when  an  explosion, 
louder  than  thunder,  rent  the  heavens,  and  the  slaver,  blown 
into  ten  thousand  fragments,  flew  into  the  air.  For  an  in- 
stant, there  was  a  dead  silence,  which  was  followed  by  the 
falling  of  the  shattered  masts,  spars  and  planks  of  the  brig, 
mingled  with  the  dead  bodies  of  her  men.  And  thus,  as  it 
ought,  ends  the  "  CRUISE  OF  A  GUINEAMAN." 


FITZ-GUBIN; 

OR, 

THE    ADMIRAL'S    PET. 

BY  THE  AUTHOR  OP  "SINGLETON  FONTENOY,"  ETC. 


CHAPTER     I. 

WHEN  Mogglestonleugh  got  the  Thunderbolt,  (for col- 
lecting evidence  on  the  continent  about  Lady  , 

which  proved  highly  serviceable  in  the  divorce  case,)  his  first 
youngster  was  Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Gubin.  The  Thunderbolt 
was  flag-ship  on  the  South  American  station.  They  ex- 
cused Fitz-G.  from  the  mizen-top  because  he  was  young, 
and  from  night  watch  because  he  was  delicate,  and  from 
boat  duty  because  there  were  other  youngsters  to  attend  to 
the  jolly  boat  without  troubling  him.  The  assistant  surgeon 
reported  him  ill  at  Lisbon,  and  the  surgeon  recommended 
a  week  at  Cintra  for  him.  The  minister  had  a  party  to 
meet  him.  The  chaplain  gave  him  a  Bible,  the  "  gift  of  his 
well-wisher,  the  Rev.  T.  Jenks,"  as  the  fly-leaf  proclaimed. 
Fellows  in  the  mess  wrote  home  to  "  Dear  papa," — "  We 
have  a  pleasant  set  of  messmates  here  ;  young  Lord  Alfred 
Fitz-Gubin  is  one  of  my  most  intimate  friends  among  them." 
Smoggbuckle  overdid  his  share  of  it,  for  he  lent  him  fifty 
pounds,  which  was  soon  after  returned  by  his  mother 
(through  the  captain)  in  a  letter,  in  which  Smoggbuckle 


48  SWELL-LIFE   AT   SEA;   OR, 

was  called  a  "designing  person."  When  he  shot  a  bull 
belonging  to  the  beef  contractor,  the  captain  blew  up  the 
beef  contractor,  and  paid  for  the  bull.  Lord  Alfred  walked 
upon  velvet  through  the  service. 

The  Thunderbolt  being  paid  off,  the  Admiralty  delibe- 
rated as  to  what  was  the  best  ship — and  sent  him  to  China, 
because  they  foresaw  active  service  there,  and  wished  to 
give  him  a  chance  of  distinguishing  himself.  He  showed 
such  gallantry — (against  a  junk  with  a  wooden  gun  in  it) — 
that  Captain  Tournspit  felt  it  his  duty  (indeed,  could  not 
have  rested  in  his  bed  quietly  had  he  neglected  it)  to  men- 
tion him  with  praise  in  a  despatch.  The  Chinese  War 
becoming  a  mere  bore,  in  due  time  Lord  Alfred  came  home, 
(by  the  overland  route,)  and  soon  after  "passed"  for  lieu- 
tenant, and  went  out  to  the  Mediterranean.  This  was  con-' 
venient,  for  some  relations  of  the  family  were  going  to  yacht 
there.  The  yacht  Giselle  was  in  preparation  for  an  august 
party  at  the  time  Fitz-Grubin  sailed  in  the  Cocytus  to  Malta. 
They  arrived  there  at  a  period  which  naval  men  will  remem- 
ber as  that  when  Roribel  became  flag-lieutenant.  A  sketchy 
paragraph  on  RoribePs  reception  of  the  news  of  the  vacancy 
may  not  be  amiss.  "  It  requires,"  said  he,  "a  particular 
class  of  man  to  be  flag-lieutenant.  He  should  be  gentle- 
manly, (here  he  looked  at  his  boots;)  handsome,  (here  he 
pullecl  up  his  shirt-collar;)  of  good  abilities,  (here  he  smiled 
with  self-complacency;)  and  generally  popular !"  (here  he 
bowed  and  rubbed  his  hands,  as  much  as  to  say,  "  Now  you 
have  him  1")  Roribel  was  made  flag-lieutenant,  vice  Maun- 
derson,  who'  had  taken  advantage  of  the  position  to  make 
up  to  a  great  wine-merchant's  daughter,  (whom  the  wags 
of  the  squadron  had  christened  the  Countess  of  Bucellas,) 
and  had  retired  from  the  service  iato  matrimony,  accord- 
ingly. 

The  Cocytus  broke  down  off  Pantellaria :  why,  nobody 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING,  49 

seems  ever  to  have  found  out.  As  there  was  scarcely  any 
wind,  she  was  in  an  awkward  plight.  She  signalled  to 
the  old  Bloater,  Mrs.  Pappleton  commanding,  (such  was 
Adair's  joke,  though  the  newspapers  never  so  described  the 
corvette,  to  my  knowledge.)  The  Bloater  was  jogging 
along  as  usual,  returning  to  Malta  from  a  cruise,  and  For. 
bessy  was  in  charge  of  the  morning  watch.  He  at  once 
proceeded  to  the  cabin  to  report  the  event  to  Pappleton, 
who  left  the  society  of  youth  and  beauty  (this  was  the 
phrase  of  the  gallant  and  polished  Mules,  the  clerk  ;  I  must 
tell  you  he  meant  Mrs.  P.,  which  you  would  never  have 
guessed)  at  the  stern  call  of  duty — in  fact,  came  on  deck 
to  see  what  was  the  matter.  A  boat,  of  course,  had  to  be 
sent  to  the  Cocytus,  and  Forbessy  went  in  her  to  the 
steamer. 

A  ladder  was  lowered  as  he  came  alongside.  He  found 
Captain  Hostibus  storming  and  raging  about  the  deck,  and 
all  the  engineers  under  arrest ;  out  of  which,  however,  they 
were  constantly  called,  every  now  and  then,  to  see  if  no- 
thing could  be  done.  Forbessy  was  walking  about  the 
deck,  waiting  the  return  of  Hostibus  from  another  visit  to 
the  engine-room,  when  he  heard  a  low,  languid  voice — a 
voice  of  blended  effeminacy  and  indifference,  saying — "  Pro- 
voking !  and  before  breakfast,  too !  very  irritating  to  onr 
friend  Hostibus,  all  this  must  be.  Confounded  engineering 
fellows  1" 

Forbessy  turned,  and  saw  the  speaker  before  him — a  long 
youth,  with  light  hair,  and  big,  watery  blue  eyes,  whose 
dress  bespoke  him  naval,  though  it  was  by  no  means  punc- 
tiliously fashioned  after  the  regulations.  He  looked  at 
Forbessy,  and  said,  lazily,  "You  are  from  the  corvette,  I 
suppose  ?" 

"  I  am." 

?'  By  Jove  !  I  hardly  see  my  way.     I  suppose  Hostibus 

§ 


50  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OK, 

must  do  something,  or  you  do  something  for  Hostibus.  Bui 
I  was  thinking — let  me  see — yours  is  a  rather  large  boat  ? 
...  I  have  it." 

Here  Hostibus  re-appeared,  and  came  aft.  "Nothing 
for  it — the  corvette  must  send  her  pinnace  on  to  Malta, 
and  ask  for  a  steamer  for  us  1  She  must  take  on  the 
mails,  too." 

The  youth  spoke  again.  "  But,  Capt.  Hostibus,  couldn't 
she  (the  captain  paused  for  the  suggestion  or  advice)  .... 

couldn't  she  ...  so  very  slow,  this couldn't  she  take 

me  in  1" 

"Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Gubin,"  said  Hostibus,  "the  service 
must  be  attended  to  !"  Hostibus  turned  on  his  heel. 

This  was  the  first  glimpse  Forbessy  ever  got  of  Lord 
Fitz-Gubin.  It  was  characteristic.  It  would  not  be  too 
much  to  say,  that  it  exhibited  his  naval  views  altogether. 
He  had  been  so  dandled  and  pampered  during  his  career, 
that  he  expected  obstacles  to  fly  before  him — like  strag- 
glers out  of  the  path  of  a  Roman  Consul.  They  say  that 
when  the  "  Lotos"  was  lost  by  the  genius  of  Mooner,  Lord 
Alfred  thought  his  chest  the  paramount  object  to  be  saved. 

We  will  not  trouble  ourselves  further  with  the  Cocytus, 
except  to  say  that,  by  dint  of  a  fair  wind,  she  reached 
Malta  in  safety.  Next  morning  after  her  arrival,  a  gun- 
case  made  its  appearance  on  board  the  flag-ship,  followed 
by  a  couple  of  pointers.  Sensation  in  the  Sovereign  !  These 
were  succeeded  by  a  chest  of  more  than  ordinary  dimen- 
sions. Increased  curiosity  1  A  fishing  rod  and  beautiful 
dressing-case  next  arrived.  ("This  is  a  gentleman!"  ex- 
claimed Cuckles,  with  decision.)  But  what  was  the  feeling 
when  an  object  came  which  was  almost  immediately  recog^ 
nised  as  a  tent  ?  ("A  person  of  consideration,"  exclaimed 
Cuckles.)  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  himself  reported  his  "joining" 
tp  Commander  Mutter,  in  the  course  of  the  day.  The  com- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  51 

mander,  one  of  the  serious  school,  (who  are  often  of  the 
most  aristocratic  principles — looking  on  "  dignities"  as  parts 
of  the  "  great  scheme,"  and  truckling  accordingly,)  received 
him  with  empressement,  and  introduced  him  to  Cuckles. 
Cuckles  deliberated  as  to  who  were  the  most  eligible  men 
in  their  mess  whom  he  could  form  a  little  "  set"  out  of,  for 
his  "  noble  friend." 

In  the  Sovereign,  as  in  most  large  messes  of  any  preten- 
sions, there  is  a  "  red-book"  section  of  men,  who,  somehow 
or  other,  fancy  themselves,  or  make  themselves,  or  are 
tacitly  allowed  to  be,  what  our  old  friend  Jenkins  would  call 
the  creme.  It  is  the  same  in  provincial  towns,  and  in  fact 
in  every  sphere  where  a  moderate  number  of  people  live 
together.  But  it  is  by  no  means  easy  to  say  how  the 
arrangement  takes  place,  or  distinctly  to  point  out  what 
the  laws  are  which  divide  the  sets,  or  form  the  upper  set. 
As  scientific  men  are  not  agreed  how  fairy  rings  are  pro- 
duced, (though  I  believe  it  is  certain  that  toad-stools  and 
such  fungi  have  something  to  do  with  it,)  so  "circles"  of 
society  are  as  difficult  to  account  for; — whatever,  too,  we 
may  allow  to  the  "  fungus"  influence  in  their  case  !  It  is 
not  only  birth,  or  only  money,  or  only  brains,  or  only  man- 
ners ; — these  are  all  powers  in  their  way,  but  any  one  of 
them  will  sometimes  make  a  hit,  and  I  have  known  hits 
made  by  people  who  possessed  none  of  them.  Generally, 
the  blending  of  various  advantages  in  moderate  proportions 
is  the  staple  of  success,  and  the  having  a  pursuit  in  com- 
mon, the  great  bond  of  union.  Cuckles  then,  who  was 
upper-deck-mate  of  the  Sovereign — who  had  in  that  posi- 
tion the  Commander's  ear,  and  was,  so  far,  of  consequence — 
who  further  was  a  senior  mate,  and  a  very  shrewd,  worldly 
person,  was  one  of  the  swell  clique  of  the  Sovereign ;  Tom 
Riddel,  with  the  largest  income  in  the  mess,  and  a  free, 
daring  way  about  him,  was  another ;  Siddlington  again,  by 


52  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

dint  of  great  respectability  and  careful  manners,  and  an 
orthodox  way  of  looking  at  everything,  was  a  third.  These 
and  others  gave  the  tone  to  the  mess,  which  was  a  sumptu- 
ous and  stately  establishment,  beyond  the  dreams  of  Ben- 
bow.  About  one  in  the  day,  a  knot  of  fellows  were  usually 
to  be  found  in  a  main-deck  cabin,  which  one  of  the  lieuten- 
ants allowed  to  be  made  a  lounging-place  of.  The  Sove- 
reign at  this  time  lay  habitually  in  Malta,  more  like  an  im- 
movable castle  in  the  harbor  there — stately,  and  utterly 
calm — than  a  ship.  The  captain,  of  course,  lived  on  shore  ; 
you  might  see  him  any  day,  trudging  along  Strada  Treale, 
as  his  children  were  dragged  down  the  street  in  a  pony 
chaise,  by  his  side.  As  for  the  Admiral,  he  was  seldom 
seen,  though  perhaps  oftener  heard  of  than  people  wished. 

To  the  cabin  in  question,  supplied  with  a  comfortable 
sofa  and  chairs,  and  adorned  with  a  picture  of  a  brigand 
and  his  daughter,  Cuckles  led  Fitz-Gubin.  The  knot  were 
there,  consuming  ices  brought  on  board  by  an  old  French- 
man daily,  about  whom  the  legend  went  that  he  came  to 
Malta  originally  as  the  son  of  a  noble,  banished  by  the 
Revolution. 

Fitz-G.  was  duly  introduced,  and  found  the  conversation 
busy  with  the  old  topics — the  Admiral,  the  Captain,  the 
Sovereign,  the  Court-martial  on  P ,  (not  held  really  be- 
cause he  neglected  so-and-so,  you  know,  but  because  he 
jilted  old  Froggan's  niece.)  A  new  anecdote  of  Mr.  Adair 
was  added  to  the  day's  stock  by  Tawney,  who  dropped 
down,  after  copying  an  "order,"  to  have  a  chat.  It  seems 
that,  after  Mr.  Adair  left  the  Bloater,  for  the  Preposterous, 
("where/7  said  Tawney,  "Ricks  swears  he'll  finish  him,") 
he  was  crossing  the  harbor  in  one  of  the  cutters,  when  who 
should  pass  but  Mrs.  Pappleton  in  her  husband's  gig.  Mr. 
Adair  made  the  crew  of  his  boat  toss  their  oars,  as  to  a 
Captain — an  audacious  professional  jest  indeed  ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.     5.3 

"Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Gubin,  our  new  messmate  ;  Mr.  Rid- 
del, Mr.  Siddlington,"  said  Cackles. 

"Been  in  the  Mediterranean  before,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin?" 
asked  Siddlington. 

"No.  Fve  come  out  here  to  look  about  me  a  little  now, 
though.  I  was  in  China  ;  I  was  in  South  America."  He 
said  this  languidly,  as  usual,  and  then  paused,  as  if  he  had 
ceased  to  take  any  interest  in  the  subject.  Have  you  ever 
seen  a  sluggish  compass?  (But  of  course,  if  a  naval  man, 
you  have.)  The  quartermaster  must  jerk  it  with  the  string 
to  keep  its  mystic  force  alive  and  active.  Fitz-Gubin  often 
seemed  to  resemble  it. 

Old  Polonai  came  in  with  some  ices.  "  Good  morning, 
old  Polonai,"  said  Riddel,  (one  of  your  sanguineous-looking 
fellows,  close-cropped,  red  up  to  the  ears,  bare-necked,  and 
bursting  with  animal  spirits.) 

"  Good  morn,  Signor  Riddel,"  said  the  old  man,  with  a 
meek  smile. 

"  Glace  je  fais, 
On  ne  me  paye, 
Je  suis  le  Sire  de  Polonai !" 

said  Riddel,  jumping  up  from  his  sofa  to  seize  his  ice. 

"  That's  rather  good,"  said  Lord  Alfred,  looking  at  Rid 
del. 

"Oh,  I  made  that,  some  mornings  ago — about  Polonai. 
'Gad,  he's  descended  from  the  Coucys,  for  aught  I  know. 
.     .     .     ...      I  say,  Polonai,  pick  up  the  spoon,  like  a 

good  fellow  !" 

The  old  man  stooped,  as  he  was  bid,  and  gave  the  spoon 
to  Rid'del.  (Have  you  ever  wondered,  reader,  what  sort  of 
fellow  you  would  have  been,  by  this  time,  if  you  had  been 
turned  adrift  at  eight  years  of  age  ?) 

"  I'll  take  an  ice,"  said  Fitz-Gubin.  The  ancient  French- 
man brought  his  tub  to  the  cabin-door  to  supply  him. 


54  SWELL     LlFE    AT     SEA;     OR, 

Polonai,  junior,  (for  our  friend  had  married  a  Maltese  in 
due  time,  and  was  now  naturalized  as  a  Maltese,  almost — 
though  he  occasionally  disappeared  frem  the  island — <;  to 
France,"  people  said) — a  handsome  boy  with  those  in- 
tensely black  eyes  which  the  Maltese  have — carried  it  for 
his  father. 

"Well,  younker,"  began  Riddel,  who  had  "chaff"  ready 
for  all  comers — "you're  the  rising  hope  of  the  Polonai 
family,  eh  ?"  "  Yes,  Signer,"  said  the  boy. 

"But,  by  the  toe  of  St.  Peter — where  did  you  get  that 
cap  worked  for  you  ?" 

"That,  Signor,"  the  youngster  answered,  with  some* re- 
serve, "  was  my  sister's  making." 

Old  Polonai  spoke  to  his  boy  in  Maltese — and  he  went 
away.  The  gentlemen  of  the  cabin  looked  at  each  other. 

Polonai  looked  up,  with  his  meek  smile  and  subdued 
manner — "  Anything  more  to-day?"  The  world  had — by 
long  passing  him  through  its  hands,  and  rubbing  him  to 
and  fro — smoothened  and  flattened  him  like  an  out-worn 
sixpence  ; — all  the  stamp  and  impress  was  gone.  The  world 
treats  unlucky  fellows  like  one  of  those  defaced  sixpences 
one  sometimes  comes  across.  They  pass,  to  be  sure,  (for 
what  little  they  exchange  for,)  but  you  can  see  that  they 
have  everywhere  had  the  ill-luck  to  be  suspected — bit — 
pinched — blackened  all  along. 

"  I  think — no  more,  to-day.  And,  Polonai,  I  owe  you 
something,  and  here  it  is,"  said  Riddel,  producing  a  dollar 
or  two. 

"  Thank  you,  Signor." 

"  And,  Polonai — but  no — no  matter  !  Good  day,  Mon- 
sieur de  Polonai." 

With  his  meek  smile  and  subdued  way,  the  old  French- 
man shambled  off. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  55 

*'  I  suppose  it's  a  joke  about  that  old  fellow  being  a 
noble  ?"  said  Fitz-Gubin. 

"  'Gad,  I  don't  know,"  said  Riddel.  "  I  heard  so  half-a- 
dozen  years  ago,  when  I  was  here  in  the  Burrampooter." 

"  Must  be  a  mere  joke,"  said  Cackles,  shaking  his  head. 

"  I'm  not  so  sure  of  that,"  said  Siddlington.  "  I  remem- 
ber Campbell  of  the  Violet  used  to  say  that  he  had  read 
something  about  the  Polonais,  and  that  he  thought  it  very 
likely — and  I  know,  he  said  it  was  a  great  shame,  fellows 
chaffing  the  old  boy.7' 

"  Well,"  said  Riddel,  "  I  really  begin  to  feel  an  interest 
in  old  Polonai  !" 

"That's  capital,  upon  my  word,"  broke  in  Corbieton,  a 
mate.  "  Ever  since  the  s  m  told  you  that  his  cap  was 
worked  by — " 

"  Did  you  ever  hear  such  a  confounded,  suspicious,  evilly- 
disposed  animal  as  that  Corbieton  ?"  said  Riddel. 

41 1  really  wonder,"  said  Siddlington,  "  if  there's  a  4  blood' 
look  about  the  girl  ?" 

Fitz-Gubin  pulled  out  his  watch.  "  Do  you  know,  gen- 
tlemen— I  should  be  greatly  obliged,  if  some  of  you  would 
come  on  shore  with  me,  and  show  me  the  town :  I  know 
nothing  of  Malta." 

Curiously  enough,  Riddel  had  been  thinking  of  going  on 
shore,  and  so  had  Corbieton,  and  so  had  everybody,  I  dare 
say,  that  singularly  fine  afternoon  !  So  they  descended  to 
the  gun-room,  and  Fitz-Gubin  made  the  acquaintance  of  the 
most  brilliant  of  modern  messes. 

I  fear  that  we  shall  never  attain  the  art  of  (what  I  define 
to  be  the  true  ideal  of  fitting  up  a  naval  mess-room)  divest- 
ing the  apartment  of  all  appearance  of  being  part  of  a  ship  1 
We  may  aim,  indeed,  at  it ;  we  may  smother  the  lockers  in 
sumptuous  cushions  ;  we  may  hide  the  deck  with  the  most 


56  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

glittering  oil-cloth ;  we  may  erect  neat  book-shelves,  and 
luxuriate  in  French  varnish  j  and  throw  around  the  stern- 
posts  the  magic  of  violet  curtains ;  it  is  in  our  power  to 
adorn  the  tiller,  and  to  make  the  thirty-two  pounders  ob- 
jects of  interesting  beauty  ;  but  this  is  all !  This  all  was 
better  achieved  in  the  Sovereign  than  art  has  ever  achieved 
it  elsewhere.  The  steward  (who  indeed  was  now  in  his  eabk), 
reading  a  new  novel)  justly  felt  that  he  occupied  a  position 
equal  to  that  of  the  surgeon  of  a  former  age,  and  was 
reported  to  be  paying  his  addresses  to  the  daughter  of  a 
native  officer  of  the  Maltese  Fencibles.  When  he  heard, 
through  his  assistant,  (who  had  it  from  his  assistant,)  that 
Lord  Fitz-Grubin  had  joined,  he  expressed  his  approval ; 
intimated  to  the  assistant  that  the  mess  wanted  some  such 
ornament  ;  and  yawned  over  the  novel  again,  somewhat  rid 
of  the  afternoon's  ennui  ! 

Lord  Alfred  intimated  his  approval  of  the  gun-room  in 
very  decided  terms  to  the  polite  Cuckles,  who  watched  its 
effect  upon  him. 

"  Really  you  have  made  all  that  could  be  made  of  the 
place,  upon  my  word.  We  might,  to  be  sore,  make  an  im- 
provement here  I"  Cuckles  was  all  ears  (as  usual).  "  We 
might,  mightn't  we,  remove  the  guns  ln 

Riddel  looked  up  to  see  if  he  \^as  joking,  but  he  was 
imperturbably  solemn,  and  perfectly  in  earnest.  Indeed, 
such  was  his  usual  mental  complexion.  He  went  through 
life,  and  the  service,  with  the  most  entire  good  faith — amus- 
ing himself,  indulging  himself,  eating,  drinking,  sleeping, 
and  smoking,  with  a  grave  continuity  of  action  and  self- 
possession  of  manner  (partly  natural,  but  chiefly  the  result 
of  his  bringing  up)  which  were  wonderful  to  behold. 

"  We  might  remove  the  tiller,  I  think,"  growled  an  old 
mate. 

"  What  does  he  say  ?"  whispered  his  lordship  to  Cuckles. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.     57 

"  Oh  !  never  mind  him,  my  lord — old  mate,  of  the  name 
of  Manton,"  whispered  Cackles — as  an  interpreter  might 
render  to  you  the  sayings  of  a  Cherokee. 

In  a  little  while  the  party  were  ready  to  go  on  shore. 
When  they  went  on  deck,  Cuckles  was  there — seeing  the 
bitts  blacked,  and  the  paint  washed — the  work  which  has 
to  be  done  in  Malta  harbor,  and  which  must  be  carefully 
done,  too. 

As  Riddel  was  at  the  side,  calling  a  shore-boat,  Fitz- 
Gubin,  who  by  this  time  had  acquired  a  wonderful  knack 
of  knowing  the  men  liable  to  his  influence — and  whom  he 
generally  contrived,  in  every  ship,  to  win  and  use — chatted 
very  affably  with  Cuckles.  "  Mr.  Cuckles  had  been  very 
courteous  ;  would  he — might  he,  Fitz-G.,  hope  he  would — 
just  see  about  his  hammock  and  hammock-man,  and — he 
supposed  a  good  marine  was  unengaged — but  really  he  was 
ashamed."  Cuckles,  civil  at  every  pore  to  rank — the  pet 
of  the  commander — undertook  everything,  and  discharged 
what  he  promised,  like  the  faithful  fellow  he  was.  In  the 
meantime,  Mr.  Riddel  hailed  the  mess-boat,  which  you 
might  have  known  anywhere  by  its  flag — bearing  the  mess- 
arms,  (a  donkey  rampant,)  and  in  it  the  party  seated  them- 
selves. There  was  a  scandalous  report,  by-the-by,  about 
this  time,  that  some  youngsters  had  so  destroyed  the  confi- 
dence, which  is  the  basis  of  all  commercial  credit,  that  you 
could  not  get  a  casual  shore-boat  without  difficulty.  But 
this  was,  probably — like  a  rumor  about  Lieutenant  Bulrush 
(commanding  the  Roarer,  10)  and  his  cattche — a  mere  idle 
invention — one  of  that  copious  crop  of  rumors  which  every 
season  at  Malta  brings  forth.  We  cannot  be  expected  to 
waste  our  time  upon  these  ! 

We  may  now — for,  by  the  magic  of  fiction,  we  have 
landed  our  party  in  Mula's  Cafe — skipping  past  Strada  St. 
Giovanni  and  its  shops — (I  say  skipping  past  its  shops — 


58  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

and  if  you  will  put  an  evil  construction  upon  our  smartness 
in  passing  Darba's — why  you  must !)  consider  Lord  Alfred 
as  having  begun  his  naval  career  in  the  Mediterranean.  For 
isn't  the  shore  the  predominant,  the  important  scene  of 
such  career  ?  Whom  do  you  dress  to  please  in  the  Mediter- 
ranean ? — somebody  on  shore.  Where  did  Riddel  keep  his 
pony  ?  Where  did  Siddlington  buy  his  jewelry  ?  Where 
did  Montemart  display  his  waltzing  ? 

"  This  is  pleasant  enough,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  lounging  in 
the  cool  halls  of  Mula.  He  paused.  "  I  like  Malta,  I 
think.  I  think  it's  as  well  though,  to  be  here,  in  a  ship." 

11  To  be  here,  in  a  ship  ?"  Riddel  repeated,  somewhat 
puzzled. 

"  Why,  you  know,  you  sleep  out  in  the  sea-air." 

"  So  you  do,"  said  Riddel,  thoughtfully.  "  Gad,  that's 
a  new  point  in  the  profession." 

"  I  like  the  profession,"  said  Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Gubin. 

I  am  not  going,  at  this  time,  to  take  our  friends  into  those 
circles  of  beauty  and  fascination,  which  waited  Fitz-Gubin's 
pleasure.  That  the  Admiral  knows  of  his  arrival  and  will 
probably  produce  something  drinkable  when  he  asks  him  to 
dinner — an  event  to  which  the  gallant  officer's  nieces,  also, 
look  with  an  interest  of  their  own  ;  that  other  houses,  with 
that  regard  for  the  peerage,  which  is  a  characteristic  of  the 
island,  intend  to  show  a  proper  attention  to  the  "  descend- 
ant of  an  ancient  family  in  Picardy,"  we  may,  of  course, 
presume.  But  this  evening,  I  ask  your  company  to  dinner 
in  the  Sovereign,  and  invoke  the  shade  of  Benbow  to  be 
present  at  the  board  ! 

Our  party  has  returned  to  that  stately  line-of-battle  ship, 
and  twilight  is  wrapping  itself  round  the  white  island — twi- 
light of  a  faint  blue,  through  which  the  hulls  and  spars  of 
the  vessels  in  harbor  rise  dark  and  solemn.  As  it  deepens, 
the  bells  of  Yaletta  are  ringing,  vexing  the  languid  air  with 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  59 

their  silver  clang,  clang,  to  the  which  answer  the  bells  of 
Burmola,  meeting  them  half-way  on  the  harbor  waters,  and 
ringing  a  half-mournful  melancholy  note  over  the  marriage 
of  summer  and  sea.  There  is  a  momentary  thrill  of  cool, 
ness  that  almost  chills,  as  the  breeze  comes  noiselessly  from 
the  outside  ocean,  and  air,  and  waters,  and  bell-notes  mingle 
together.  Deepening  yet,  though  the  bells  jingle  as  if  they 
would  fain  frighten  the  darkness  away.  In  the  distance,  a 
light  glides  across  the  harbor — like  a  corpse-light  gliding  to 
show  you  where  a  funeral's  path  shall  be.  It  is  a  boat, 
reader,  taking  Brown  of  the  Ganges  to  dine  with  Smith  of 
the  Bustard.  Let  us  leave  the  harbor  alone.  Have  we  not 
three  hundred  and  sixty-four  twilights  to  look  at  in  the 
year,  and  are  we  not  going  to  dinner  ? 

The  mess-dinner  of  the  Sovereign  is  laid  out.  Some 
twenty-five  fellows  sit  down.  The  steward  (elaborately 
attired)  bows  as  he  sees  Fitz-Gubin  seat  himself  with  the 
knot  at  the  head  of  the  table — Riddel,  Corbieton,  Siddling- 
ton,  &c.  His  satisfied  eye  welcomes  the  mild,  familiar  glass 
of  china,  and  silver,  and  the  pleasant  gleam  of  the  huge 
decanters  of  iced  wine.  The  dinner  is  the  object  of  con- 
stant admiration,  and  Cuckles  daily  jokes  on  its  splendor, 
as  compared  with  that  which  he  supposes  to  be  the  habitual 
fare  of  the  mess  (except,  of  course,  those  of  our  degree) 
at  home.  (Pleasant  Cuckles — thou  man  of  fine  heart  and 
fine  taste  !) 

The  steward,  with  a  profound  bow,  now  hands  to  Lord 
Fitz-Gubin,  the  carte.  I  say  distinctly,  the  carte.  Shade 
of  Lord  Collingwood — (to  whose  descendants  in  the  female 
line,  a  grateful  Government  would  not  continue  the  title*) 

*  And  this— though  COLLINGWOOD,  besides  boasting  such  services,  and 
such  a  mind  and  character  as  were  his,  was  a  man  of  distinguished  family ! 
If  we  will  plebeianize  our  peerage,  let  us,  at  least,  cease  to  sneer  at  our 
plebeians .  — ED. 


60  SWELL-LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

shade  of  Benbow,  wag  your  ghostly  pig-tail,  and  let  us  look 
at  the  items  of  the  carte.  (The  cook  of  the  Sovereign  was 
a  man  of  genius,  and  will  probably  die  a  baronet.) : — "Cote- 
lettes  d  la  Trafalgar  ;  Fricassee  de  Gibier  en  pigtail  antique  ; 
Vol  au  vent,  au  maintop  ;  Brimbousky  marine,  fyc.,  fyc" 

These  were  the  leading  features  of  the  entertainment  that 
day,  with  sufficient  substantial,  of  course ;  which,  by-the- 
by,  were  highly  necessary  to  the  youngsters,  who  could  not 
always,  if  we  are  to  believe  some  people,  get  any  of  the 
finer  specimens  of  the  cuisine.  Bung,  the  master's  assistant, 
made  a  democratic  agitation  on  the  subject,  by  bawling  to 
the  servants  after  some  of  the  "  ong  pigtail  hontick,"  but  the 
roar  of  laughter  (which  his  pronunciation  justly  raised) 
soon  caused  him  to  subside  into  silence  and  boiled  beef. 
What  was  worse,  he  never  heard  the  last  of  the  matter 
You  don't,  indeed,  often  hear  the  last  of  a  joke  in  the  ser- 
vice, and  many  a  fellow  who  has  got  himself  a  nickname  in 
his  first  week,  retains  it  for  life,  carries  it  over  the  whole 
globe,  and  through  every  grade  of  rank,  and  dies  in  it. 
Accordingly,  the  youngsters  were  perpetually  at  Bung — 
"Bung,  any  hontick  to-day  ?"  &c.,  &c. 

"  Lord  Alfred,  a  glass  of  wine,"  said  Cuckles,  ordering 
champagne  ;  a  luxury  in  which,  to  do  him  justice,  he  did 
not  often  indulge.  They  drank. 

"  I  like  the  dinner,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  with  his  usual  delib- 
eration. "  The  cook  is  really  not  bad.  He  ranks,  of  course, 
as  a  petty  officer  ?" 

Here,  I  think,  I  may  close  a  chapter,  and  leave  the  reader 
to  his  meditations ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  61 


CHAPTER    II. 

THE  mere  mention  of  the  cockpit — such  as  it  once  exist- 
ed— justly  excites  a  fastidious  sneer.  The  reading  public 
has  to  be  disabused  of  several  notions  about  Her  Majesty's 
navy.  The  blockheads  who  believe  that  a  midshipman 
"  shivers  his  timbers,"  are,  of  course,  hopeless,  and  with 
them  I  decline  to  communicate.  But  a  better  informed 
class  may  still  be  ignorant,  that  on  board  the  Sove- 
reign, Brummell  might  have  attired  his  person  with  all  the 
care  which  it  demanded.  Again  Fitz-Grubin  expressed  his 
satisfaction,  when  he  found  the  comfortable  and  spacious 
place  for  his  chest ;  where  a  judicious  array  of  curtains 
made  up  a  cabin,  and  where  his  marine  had  prepared  every- 
thing for  him.  Cuckles,  whose  apparatus  was  not  far  off, 
was  busy  about  the  place,  keeping  the  lavatory  arrange- 
ments of  the  youngsters  within  proper  bounds.  Siddlington, 
again,  in  a  corner,  was  devoting  to  his  whiskers  that  intense 
and  absorbing  attention  which  auburn  whiskers  demand. 
How  different  the  leisure  and  space  here,  to  the  absurd  dif- 
ficulties of  the  Bloater,  where  the  wretched  Mules  wore  out 
his  heart  in  endeavoring  to  keep  up  his  appearance  ! 

The  toilette  hour  in  one  of  your  big  ships  is  always  a  lively 
one.  How  properly,  in  one  sense,  was  the  table  where  the 
many  (for  they  could  not  all  have  curtains  and  seclusion)- 
washed,  called  the  amputation  talk !  How  were  reputations 
lopped,  and  dissected,  and  pruned,  and  trimmed,  over  those 
pewter  basins  1  What  pleasantries  about  Ricks,  about  the 
commander,  the  notabilities  of  Malta,  and  the  news  of  the 
squadron  !  What  chuckles  when  Manton,  the  old  mate, 
could  not  find  his  wig  1  What  roars  when  the  DUN  pene- 
trated (which  he  had  no  business  to  do,  for  why  the  deuce* 
did  Jack  Treloony,  who  had  the  morning  watch,  let  him  on 


62  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

board?)  to  these  haunts  !  There  was  a  laugh,  indeed,  when 
Saijan,  when  Nathan,  or  Darba  came  groping  along  among 
half-lashed-up  hammocks.  The  Dun  in  your  place  like  Malta, 
becomes  quite  naval.  He  knows  when  the  Intolerable  is 
going  to  get  her  orders  ;  that  the  Yiper  is  to  be  sent  home, 
because  she's  overmasted  ;  he  hears,  as  soon  as  the  squad- 
ron does,  that  Captain  Kansacker  has  lost  all  that  money 
at  blind-hookey  ;  and  he  wonders,  as  everybody  wonders, 
what  the  devil  Ransacker  will  do  this  time. 

That  laughter  from  the  youngsters,  when  the  Dun  makes 
his  morning  call,  is  to  the  philosophic  ear,  a  melancholy 
sound.  What  a  number  of  us  have  joined  in  it  at  sixteen, 
and  sighed  at  it  at  six-and-twenty  !  This  association  of 
humor  with  the  serious  events  of  life  (as  the  apparition  of 
the  Dun  eventually  becomes)  is  very  strange.  We  joke  in 
youth  about  dunning,  about  matrimony,  and  about  hanging, 
I  believe,  more  than  any  other  subjects.  Yet,  infallibly, 
the  time  comes  when  we  pay — we  marry — and  if  we  don't 
hang,  (as  is  to  be  hoped,)  yet  we  think  with  seriousness  on 
that  catastrophe,  and  life  generally.  That  morning,  the 
prophetic  eye,  beholding  Livingstone  the  youngster  giving  a 
huge  order  to  Darba,  might  have  seen  through  the  vista  of 
years  a  vision  such  as  Livingstone  would  have  shrunk  from, 
could  he  have  foreseen  it.  Horace's  Cura  sticks  not  more 
closely  than  the  fatality  of  the  Dun — Post  equitem  sedet. 
Here  he  is  behind  you  on  the  hack  you  have  hired,  and  on 
which  you  are  trotting — from  Yaletta  to  Citta  Yecchia — or 
by-and-by,  along  the  pleasant  shores  of  Baiae,  or  the  rocky 
brown  hills  of  Greece,  or  the  heath-lands  of  Troy,  or  the 
rich  green  fields  of  Smyrna.  He  mounts  the  "  trireme," 
viz.,  the  pinnace  of  the  Bellerophon,  which  you  command  ; 
and  the  boat  at  Richmond  wherein  you  pull,  years  after. 
When  you  are  starring  it,  I  say,  in  London,  or  shooting 
red-legs  in  Brittany,  there  is  one  fellow  who  knows  your 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  63 

movements  as  well  as  any  of  your  family.  It  is  DARBA  of 
Strada  Reale  !  Awful  thought !  He  will  write  in  time  to 
your  venerable  parent,  and  request  him  to  pay  the  inclosed 
bill  "out  of  your  son's  patrimony" — (suggestive  Darba  !) 
Something  will  ultimately  have  to  be  done  about  that  man's 
bill.  .  .  .  But  in  the  interim,  here  is  Livingstone,  young 
and  downy-cheeked,  light-hearted  and  light-tongued,  giving 
Darba  a  large  order.  For  a  year,  Darba  will  make  no  men- 
tion of  the  matter,  and  Livingstone  will  spend  his  ready 
money  in  forgetfulness  of  the  man — whom  he  dimly  intends 
to  pay  some  day — when  (as  it  will  turn  out)  neither  his 
cheek  nor  his  heart  are  as  fresh  and  unworn  as  they  are  now. 
The  age  requires  two  treatises — the  philosophy  of  dissipation, 
and  the  philosophy  of  Duns  ! 

The  day  began  in  the  Sovereign  with  the  crossing  of  the 
topgallant-yards,  after  which,  the  hammocks  having  been 
tortured  into  perfect  smoothness  of  outline,  a  party  of  two 
were  sent  to  potter  about  the  dockyards,  or  elsewhere,  and 
the  huge  vessel  lay  still  as  the  waters  which  reflected  her 
glowing  copper,  or  her  gleaming  hull.  Awnings  spread  and 
yards  squared,  she  was  as  quiet  as  the  island  itself  in  the 
sea.  You  might  lounge  on  the  poop,  and  watch  the  bright 
green  and  yellow  boats  glitter  across  the  harbor,  like  dragon- 
flies — gaudy  as  lizards  ;  or  the  town  almost  misty  with  the 
intense  sunshine,  and  fancy  the  days  of  the  Order  of  St. 
John  back  again,  and  the  Podgerses  and  Rodgerses  still  in 
their  chilly  northern  homes.  A  whole  day,  nothing  would 
break  your  reverie,  but  the  shrill  pipe  of  the  dinner-hour, 
when  the  fruit  boats  swarmed  alongside,  and  when  poor  old 
Polonai  the  meek,  with  his  boy  and  the  ice-can,  came  sham- 
bling over  the  ship's  side,  bowing  to  the  officer  of  the 
watch — modest  before  the  sentry — civil  to  everybody. 

Fitz-Gubin  was  loitering  about  the  upper  deck  at  noon, 
and  had  just  thrust  into  his  pocket  the  Admiral's  invitation 


64  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

to  dinner,  (that  morning  arrived,)  as  the  veteran  Polonai 
came  on  board.  Fitz-Gubin  gave  a  little  hasty  glance  round 
the  deck  ;  Cackles  was  away  ;  his  messmates  of  the  watch 
were  far  aft  on  the  poop,  sitting  (there  is  no  good  denying 
it)  in  perfect  idleness  on  the  spanker-boom.  Fitz-Gubin 
came  up  to  the  gangway.  I  have  mentioned  his  solemn, 
determined  manner.  I  have  to  add  that  concealment  was  a 
strong  feature  in  the  young  gentleman's  character.  He 
rarely  let  anybody  know  what  he  had  in  his  thoughts  ;  still 
less  in  his  intentions. 

"  Hee  1  Polonai.     Glace." 

The  old  man  was  about  to  descend  the  main  hatchway. 
He  turned  back. 

"  Monsieur  no  take  it  in  the  cabin  ?" 

"Non.     No.     Here,  Polonai  V9 

The  veteran  complied.  It  was  a  sight  to  see  Fitz-Gubin 
leaning  against  the  bitts,  and  with  perfect  deliberation,  con- 
suming the  lemon-ice.  He  put  some  money  in  his  hand, 
with  the  glass,  and  was  turning  away. 

" Mais,  Monsieur,  c'est  too  much,"  said  old  Polonai,  eagerly; 
"  you  not  have  so  much  to  pay  as  this,  Monsieur." 

"Fitz-Gubin.  Lord  Fitz-Gubin — Polonai!  .  .  .  Never 
mind,  Polonai.  Quelque  jour,  je  vous  ferai  une  visite,  peut- 
etre,  et  done." 

"Milor  Fitz-Gubin.  Prenez  le  money,  if  you  please!" 
And  the  old  fellow,  with  many  bows,  and  a  sligjit  color  over 
his  withered  old  face,  forced  it  upon  him. 

Fitz-Gubin  walked  aft  in  meditation.  Riddel  and  one  or 
two  of  the  men  had  just  come  up  the  companion-ladder. 

"I  say,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  we've  been  wondering  what's 
become  of  old  Polonai  to-day  ?" 

"Have  you?  Why,  /  saw  him  a  little  ago  knocking 
about,"  said  the  youth. 

"  Fox,  of  the  Queen,  has  seen  his  daughter  ;  so  he  said, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  65 

last  night,  at  dinner.  He  swore  she's  an  angel/'  Riddel 
observed. 

"  Ah,  well,  perhaps  she  is.  How  hot  the  day  is  1"  said 
Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Gubin. 

Whereupon,  Lord  Alfred  (who,  bless  you,  could  not  be 
occupying  his  mind  with  the  family  of  an  itinerant  vender 
of  ices)  edged  away.  A  moment  afterwards,  he  was  in 
the  cabin  of  the  Commander,  and  asking  leave  to  go  on 
shore,  "  to  dine  with  the  Admiral." 

"  I  should  not  be  likely  to  refuse  you  leave  on  general 
grounds,"  said  the  Commander,  with  a  Christian  smile,  be- 
coming a  serious  man  ;  "  on  the  present  special  one  I  grant 
it  with  pleasure  I  You  will  find  that  household,  indeed,  a 
charming  one.  Beauty,  with  genius  and  gentleness — these 
are,  I  say  it  on  the  authority  of  my  personal  observation, 
its  characteristics." 

And  the  Commander  smiled,  as  if  addressing  the  compli- 
ment to  the  persons  themselves — as  indeed  he  would  have 
liked  to  have  done,  I  dare  say ;  perhaps  he  thought  some- 
thing of  the  sort  might  reach  them  from  him,  through  Fitz- 
Gubin. 

To  make  matters  still  more  agreeable  to  our  friend,  he 
gave  him  a  seat  in  the  cutter,  then  on  the  point  of  landing  a 
parcel  for  Mrs. ,  his  wife,  under  the  charge  of  a  mid- 
shipman !  The  cutter  was  cushioned,  gilt,  varnished,  and 
adorned  with  a  tiller  that  would  have  been  an  ornament  to 
a  drawing-room  table,  at  the  cost  of  said  midshipman,  Leslie 
Clare,  (lost  last  year,  I  observe,  poor  fellow,  jumping  after 
a  negro  who  tumbled  overboard,  and  would  have  caught 
cold,  if  an  English  gentleman  had  not  risked  himself,  and  so 
lost  his  life,  in  picking  him  up.)  Leslie  Clare  was  the  only 
midshipman  who  had  a  successful  contest  with  Cuckles. 
Cuckles  had  wished  to  send  him  in  this  cutter,  which  he 
commanded,  and  just  after  he  had  had  the  first  touch  put 


66  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

to  it,  to  bring  the  beef  on  board.  Clare  appealed  to  the 
Commander ;  the  Commander  decided  that  the  jolly-boat 
should  go.  He  was  a  joyous  youth  ;  his  family  were  rich  : 
all  went  well  with  him,  till  he  met  the  ill-omened  nigger, 
who  proved  the  agent  of  his  fate. 

You  are  not  to  suppose  that  Fitz-Gubin  dressed  himself 
in  full  fig  before  landing  at  this  time.  This  would  not  have 
been  becoming  one  so  essentially  a  member  of  the  "swell" 
naval  world,  with  which  we  have  at  present  to  deal.  He 
carried  a  carpet-bag.  He  patronized  the  Mitre  Hotel. 
Riddel  had  his  horse  there.  Siddlington  put  up  at  the 
Mediterranee.  Corbieton  preferred  the  Royal  Princess's. 

As  the  boat  landed,  Lord  Alfred  turned  to  Clare,  with 
whom  he  had  scarcely  exchanged  a  word,  (he  associated 
with  none  out  of  a  clique  in  any  ship,) — "Will  you  allow 
one  of  the  men  to  carry  my  carpet-bag  to  the  Mitre,  Mr. 
Clare  ?' 

Clare  was  so  surprised  that  he  involuntarily  said,  "  Yes." 
Fitz-Gubin  bowed,  and  set  off.  The  seaman  followed  ;  and 
in  due  order  they  reached  the  house,  where  the  obsequious 
landlord  received  his  Lordship  with  all  proper  deference. 
Of  course,  Snacks  had  seen  the  appointment,  which  had 
been  copied  into  a  special  paragraph  by  itself,  in  the  Malta 
Dip.,  for  the  benefit  of  the  aristocratic  "  sympathizers,"  (to 
use  a  Yankeeism,)  who  are  plentiful  in  Malta. 

Eitz-Gubin  never  long  required  aid  in  finding  his  way 
about  a  place.  Already  an  introduction  or  two  put  the 
threads  in  his  hand.  He  knew  the  art — which  you  may 
have  observed,  characterizes  the  knowing  of  the  English 
great  world,  abroad — the  art  of  comporting  himself  in 
mixed  society ;  I  don't  mean,  of  course,  the  obvious  art  of 
behaving  himself  in  company  (which  is  within  the  range  of 
an  idiot — and  for  ordinary  purposes  a  common-place  affair 
to  anybody  not  decidedly  cursed  with  the  air  bourgeois) — 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  67 

but  a  higher  art  than  that.  I  mean  an  art  like  that  of  the 
fellows  who  dive  in  the  wreck  of  the  Royal  George,  and 
who  retain  their  self-composure,  eye-sight,  and  individuality, 
among  strange  fish,  monstrous  timber,  and  mud.  In  a  word, 
the  art  of  mingling  in  society  conventionally  inferior  to  your 
own,  (yet  the  only  society  of  the  place  you  are  in,)  without 
committing  yourself  to  it  in  the  slightest  degree  !  Did  the 
fashionable  Poodle  scouring  the  Mediterranean  in  184 —  use 
up  the  services,  the  dinners,  horses,  evening  parties  (every- 
thing that  could  keep  his  great  soul  from  perishing  in  its 
own  exhausted  receiver  of  emptiness) — pic-nics,  of  every 
society  from  the  pillars  of  Hercules  to  the  Golden  Horn  ? 
Yes.  Did  he  form  a  tie  of  decent  grateful  friendship  with 
one  man  or  family  ?  When  Branton,  junior,  (of  the  Maltese 
firm,)  was  in  town  some  time  ago,  (awakening  Government 
to  the  importance  of  the  Gozo  traffic  in  Peas-pods,)  did 
Poodle  show  him  any  attention  ?  No  !  Yet,  wherever 
you  had  met  Poodle  in  the  Mediterranean,  you  would  have 
thought  him  domesticated  in  its  circles.  That  was  Poodle's 
art — the  merit  of  which  is  not  to  be  denied  to  him.  A 
similar  art  enabled  our  own  Fitz-Gubin  to  play  off  Cuckles 
for  his  utility,  another  man  or  two  for  their  sociability,  and 
so  on  ;  while  he  knew  precisely  the  worth  of  each  according 
to  his  ultimate  standard  of  social  appeal.  Be  wise,  my  good 
reader,  in  your  generation,  and  remember  to  do  with  your 
Cuckleses,  &c.,  as  you  would  with  foreign  money  : — piastres 
are  very  useful  in  the  East,  drachmas  in  Greece,  and  dollars 
in  Malta — you  are  not  expected  to  take  them  and  pass  them 
in  England  ! 

All  this  time  the  afternoon  has  been,  of  course,  wearing 
away ;  by  half-past  six,  the  Admiral's  door  began  to  give 
forth  a  series  of  thunderings,  after  each  of  which  it  rained 
in  a  visitor.  Roribel,  the  flag-lieutenant,  was  an  object  of 
serene  brilliance  ;  Sir  Ajax  Thorp,  dignified  ;  Lady  Thorp, 


68  SWELL    LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

magnificent ;  Captain  and  Mrs.  Plimmer  and  Miss  Plimraer, 
truly  imposing.  Of  Fitz-Gubin's  fresh,  sumptuous,  and 
languid  appearance,  I  can  only  say  this,  that  he  looked 
(can  you  fancy  so  charming  a  figure  ?)  like  Narcissus  after 
a  Tnrkish  bath  ! 

"  How  do  thoo  do,  Lord  Fitth-Gubin  ?  My  nieces 

How'th  your  father,  Lord  Eitth-Gubin  ?"  said  the  extremely 
aged  Admiral,  in  his  peculiar  way.  These  established 
questions  over,  (and  Lord  Alfred,  remember,  though  an 
aristocrat,  was  only  a  "mate,")  the  Admiral  left  him  to 
make  his  way  with  the  nieces. 

"  How  do  thoo  do,  Mr.  Clarendon  ?  How'th  your 
father,  Mithter  Clarendon?" 

So  was  dismissed  Mr.  Clarendon,  a  lieutenant,  cousin  to 
the  First  Lord.  And  the  Admiral,  a  minute  afterwards, 
was  wagging  his  old  gray  head,  alongside  Sir  Ajax  Thorp, 
in  close  confab. 

Roribel  and  Fitz-Gubin  fraternized ;  they  had  known 
each  other  in  South  America,  and  Riddel  Roribel  was  a 
swell. 

"  Who  are  we  waiting  for  V9  asked  Fitz-Gubin,  in  a  quiet 
corner  with  Roribel.  He  told  him. 

"  I  wish  he'd  come." 

"So  do  I.  By  Jove,  Sir !  we  are  to  tap  some  of  the 
good  claret,  to-day,"  said  Roribel,  in  an  impressive  tone. 
"You  know  our  excellent  friend  is  considered  rather  a 
screw.  In  fact,  between  ourselves,  there  was  no  keeping 
up  the  entente  cordiale  over  the  stuff  he  used  to  produce 
here  !  'Gad,  the  services  could  not  act  in  harmony  j  and 
the  Island  was  falling  into  anarchy.  They  say  Ricks  gave 
him  a  hint !" 

"The  deuce  !"  said  Fitz-Gubin. 

The  laggard  having  arrived,  Fitz-Gubin  moved  in  his 
order,  with  Miss  Plimmer,  to  dinner ;  and  found  himself 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  69 

between  that  young  lady  and  the  Admiral's  youngest  niece. 
Miss  Plimmer,  knowing  that  Fitz-G.  was  a  lord,  kindly 
overlooked  the  fact  that  he  was  only  a  mate.  In  ordinary 
cases  (papa  being  a  captain,  yon  know)  she  could  not  have 
been  expected  to  take  much  notice  of  anybody  under  a  lieu- 
tenant. As  a  lover  of  discipline,  I  cannot  but  admire  the 
discipline  which  in  these  places  arranges  such  matters.  It 
would  puzzle  Garter  King  of  Arms  (an  official  for  whom  I 
have  an  unaffected  respect)  to  discriminate  and  arrange 
precedence  in  some  societies  I  have  known.  A  captain  is  a 
captain  we  know,  (and  a  very  strange  gentleman  he  is, 
sometimes,)  and  that  Mrs.  Captain  Plimmer  should  take 
the  lead  of  Mrs.  Lieutenant  Jenks,  is  natural  enough  ;  but 
what  if  Mrs.  Jenks'  father  the  alderman  be  a  knight  ?  Is 
the  youngest  daughter  of  a  captain  in  command  superior  to 
the  eldest  daughter  of  a  captain  on  half-pay  ?  Again,  a 
midshipman  is  nobody,  we  know  ;  but  what  if  he  is  the  only 
son  of  a  man  with  five  thousand  a-year  ? 

Would  Rosa  Plimmer  have  made  an  exception  in  his 
favor  in  such  a  case  ?  It  may  be  so.  Kosa  was  pretty 
affable  now ;  for  the  third  year  of  the  commission  of  the 
Unsaleable  was  now  wearing  away  ;  and  in  a  few  months 
Captain  Plimmer  and  his  family  must  retire  into  private  life. 
It  is,  indeed,  a  touching  sight  to  see  one  of  those  veterans, 
whose  eye,  the  other  day,  carried  terror  in  every  glance, 
moving  about  a  seaport  town,  in  a  blue  overcoat — a  merely 
private  man ;  they  linger  in  these  towns,  I  think,  as  a 
mourner  lingers  by  a  churchyard,  musing  over  the  memory 
of  defunct  power — meditating  on  the  glory  of  past 
greatness. 

The  ladies  departed. 

"  Lord  Fitth-Gubin,  I  hope  thoo  like  the  Sovereign  ; 
Mithter  Clarendon,  I  thrust  thoo  are  comfortable  in  the 
Spitfire  ?" 


70  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

The  duties  of  hospitality  being  so  far  performed  to  these 
gentlemen,  and  the  " good  claret"  set  moving,  the  conver- 
sation of  the  evening  went  on  with  its  usual  decorum  on 
such  state  occasions — taking  the  initiative  from  the  Admi- 
ral, and  Sir  Ajax  Thorp — and  moving  (like  a  state  elephant 
at  ail  Indian  festival)  in  a  heavy  manner  about.  Naval 
news  was  said  little  of — indeed,  naval  talk  about  that  period 
was  half  made  up  of  growls  about  the  Admiral  himself 
(which  you  could  scarcely  expect  to  hear  at  his  own  table) ; 
politics  were,  of  course,  tabooed ;  and,  finally,  you  could 
only  wonder,  as  Fitz-Gubin  mentally  did,  what  the  dinners 
were  like  on  the  "  50<^-claret  days." 

In  the  drawing-room,  where,  in  due  time,  (but  not  before 
Fitz-Gubin's  light,  delicate  complexion  testified,  by  a  tinge 
of  faint  color,  to  the  " sanitary  reform"  which  had  been 
lately  made  in  the  AdmiraFs  dinner  arrangements,)  they 
adjourned,  Fitz-Gubin  found  the  ladies  talking  about  "  con- 
version " — the  conversion  of  the  Maltese. 

"  Can  you  convert  a  Maltese  ?"  asked  Fitz-Gubin. 

"  Why,"  said  the  eldest  Miss  Wyoming,  smiling,  "  we 
have  not  had  much  success,  hitherto.  A  system  which  so 
weds  itself  to  the  imagination  of  the  devotees,  you  know — 
attracting  through  the  senses,  as  our  minister  in  St.  Kilder- 
kin— Mr.  Fatton — says — having  no  such  attractions  to 
offer — " 

"  No  attractions  about  Mr.  Fatton,  you  mean,  Miss 
Wyoming,"  said  the  genial  Roribel,  smiling. 

"  Mr.  Roribel  is  a  wit,  you  know,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  and 
we  must  excuse  him.  But  you  understand  me,  the  absence 
of  all  that  splendid  ornament — " 

"  Those  heavenly  little  crosses,"  said  Miss  Plimmer.  "  I 
declare  the  altar  at  St.  John's — you  might  fancy  it  was  an 
emperor's  side-board." 

"  We  know  whom  it  is  but  too  calculated  to  please,  dear 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  71 

Emma,  as  Mr.  Fatten  says,"  went  on  Miss  Wyoming  mys- 
teriously. "Bat  I  do  feel  an  enthusiastic  wish  to  save — to 
win — one,  beautiful  lamb  to  the  true  fold.  I  should  like, 
shouldn't  you,  Mary,  to  convert  little  Marie  Polonai  ?" 

"Little  Marie  Polonai,"  replied  Fitz-Gubin,  mechani- 
cally. 

"  Marie  Polonai ;  do  you  know  the  name  ?" 

"  I  know  there  is  one  Polonai,  an  old  man,  who  sells  ices 
to  the  mess.  At  least,  I  think  that's  the  name." 

"  The  same  man,"  Miss  Wyoming  went  on,  warmed  by 
her  own  eloquence  ;  "  they  live  in  a  little  house  in  the  Strada 
St.  Orsola,  with  a  green  gate." 

("A  little  house  in  the  Strada  St.  Orsola,  with  a  green 
gate,"  mentally  repeated  Lord  Alfred.) 

"And  a  kind  of  court-yard,  where  there  is  an  orange- 
tree." 

("A  kind  of  court-yard,  where  there  is  an  orange-tree," 
continued  mentally  Fitz-G.) 

"  There  is  a  dried-up  fountain,  with  broken  sides — so 
romantic." 

("A  dried-up  fountain,"  his  lordship  went  on.) 

"  Lord  Fitth-Goobin,  I  with  you  a  good  night.  Mithter 
Clarendon,  I  with  you  a  good  evening."  So  saying,  the 
Admiral,  whose  load  of  years  made  it  require  no  apology 
for  him  to  withdraw  early,  toddled  off  to  bed. 

Not  long  after,  the  party  broke  up.  The  girls  were 
quite  pleased  with  the  interest  Fitz-Gubin  had  shown  in 
their  talk.  A  hint  about  a  pic-nic  to  Bosketto  had  been 
thrown  out,  and  joyfully  hailed. 

"A  very  pleasing  face,"  said  Miss  Wyoming  to  her  sister, 
as  they  were  going  to  bed.  "  Quite  the  look  of  the  old 
blood,  my  dear." 

"  Quite,  indeed,'7  was  the  innocent  reply. 

It  was  a  lovely  night,  of  the  whitest  moonlight,  as  Fitz- 


72  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Gubin  strolled  away.  Here  and  there  he  caught  a  glimpse, 
through  a  street,  of  the  sea,  which  was  all  alive  with  light. 
The  air  was  cool,  yet  there  was  scarcely  wind  enough  to 
disturb  the  blossoms  on  an  almond  tree. 

Need  I  say,  that  in  Mula's  Cafe,  whose  hospitable  door 
was  open  to  the  night,  there  was  a  large  party  of  naval 
men  ?  Fitz-Gubin  strolled  in,  bent  on  the  cooling  lemon- 
ade ;  and  found  the  usual  smoking,  supping,  refreshment, 
and  conversation  going  on. 

"  Yes,  sir,  Smithett  will  get  the  vacancy.  You'll  see," 
said  a  mate. 

"  Yacancy  !"  whispered  a  midshipman  to  my  friend,  Pug 
Welby,  "  he's  always  running  on  vacancies,  that  Moggies." 

"Yes,"  said  Pug,  "he  has  always  a  vacancy — in  his 
head  !" 

Fitz-Gubin  sat  down  at  one  of  the  little  marble  tables  by 
himself,  and  lolled  in  tranquil  meditation.  He  felt  the 
lemonade  thrill  him  with  a  pleasant  coolness,  and  there  was 
present  to  his  mind's  eye — a  little  house  in  the  Strada  St. 
Orsola,  with  a  green  gate,  and  a  kind  of  court-yard,  .with 
an  orange-tree  in  it. 

I  could  tell  you  stories  about  Fitz-Gubin's  South  Ameri- 
can adventures  (only  they  have  nothing  to  do  with  our 
present  scenes),  which  would  show  you  that  it  was  no 
wonder  that  he  sallied  forth  after  finishing  his  lemonade  on 
the  present  occasion.  In  his  most  indifferent  manner,  he 
inquired  for  Strada  St.  Orsola,  of  the  waiter  of  the  hotel 
where  he  changed  his  clothes.  It  was  not  long  before  he 
found  himself  in  a  narrow  and  steep,  hilly  street,  of  which 
many  of  the  houses  were  high,  but  lank  and  meagre-looking. 
Nothing  was  stirring  ;  his  own  shadow  in  the  moonlight 
was  all  he  saw,  as  he  walked  quietly  along,  keeping  close 
on  one  side.  Sleep  soundly,  old  Polonai !  Come  out  and 
look  at  the  moonlight,  young  Marie  ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  73 

Fitz-Gubin  presently  paused,  and  reconnoitred.  "Tall 
bouses,"  he  thinks  ;  "  high  windows."  But  a  friendly  bottle 
with  the  boatswain,  and  a  few  dollars  to  some  forecastle 
men— and  a  Jac,oUs  ladder  would  be  made  which  would 
dangle  as  lightly  as  a  cobweb  from  the  highest  window  in 
Malta  !  A  Jacob's  ladder,  whereon  evil  figures  (unlike  those 
of  the  dream  of  the  patriarch)  might  ascend  and  descend ; 
know  we  not  such  objects  ?  thinks  Fitz-Gubiu.  The  boat- 
swain of  the  "Coromandel"  might  have  told  you  stories 
about  JacoVs  ladders.  They  say,  Harry  Bulstrode  was  all 
but  caught  with  one  at  a  lofty  enough  window  (in  all  senses), 
somewhere  in  the  Mediterranean  ;  and  that  the  Admiralty 
promoted  him  out  of  the  way. 

But  it  was  net  a  tall  window,  nor  a  high  house  this,  as 
our  hero  almost  immediately  found.  It  lay  back  from  the 
street,  inside  this  kind  of  a  court-yard  ;  and  here  is  the 
adventurer  at  the  gate.  Looking  in,  he  sees  a  figure  with 
its  back  towards  him — sitting,  leaning  over  the  dried-up 
fountain. 

The  house  itself  was  all  dark.  With  the  gentlest  of 
movements  Fitz-Gubin  moved  the  gate,  and  entered  the 
court-yard,  with  a  beating  heart.  The  figure  instantly 
started  ;  back  flew  a  mantilla,  and  the  moonlight  fell  in  a 
douche  on  one  of  the  prettiest  faces — one  of  the  sweetest 
girl's  faces — he  had  ever  seen. 

"  Hush,"  said  the  youth,  "  I  am  ill.  I  am  fainting.  I 
come  to  ask  you  for  a  glass  of  water." 

Putting  his  hand  on  his  heart,  he  knelt,  and  lay  on  his 
side  on  the  grass.  The  girl's  face  showed  that  she  believed 
him,  and  she  went  inside  and  brought  a  cup.  As  she 
stooped  to  put  it  to  his  lips,  the  whole  beauty  of  her  face 
and  neck — a  neck  that  the  sun  had  not  been  allowed  to 
spoil,  and  beside  which  you  would  have  thought  pearls 
vulgar — revealed  itself  to  him.  Darker  eyes — fuller  of 

4 


T4  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

sweetness  and  light — never  held  truth  in  the  bottom  of 
their  deep  wells.* 

"  I  am  better  ;  thank  you,  in  the  name  of  the  Blessed 
Lady,"  said  our  friend.  (This  apostasy  he  found  service- 
able in  Catholic  countries  )  "  By  what  name  shall  I 
remember  you  ?  " 

"  My  name  is  Marie.77      # 

"  Then,  thank  you,  Marie.  I  am  better  and  must  go. 
You  live  here  ?" 

11  This  is  my  father's/7 

"  I  must  be  going.  You  have  a  pretty  place  here, 
Marie.77 

"  It  is  quiet,  and  we  are  quiet — are  you  now  well?77  in- 
quired the  girl. 

He  rose.  "  Thanks  to  you,  I  am — and  I  must  go  home. 
What  a  smell  of  flowers  !  I  must  send  you  a  jewel  for 
your  kindness,  Marie.77 

"  Good  night,  Signor,77  said  the  girl,  in  a  very  serious 
manner. 

He  bowed,  and  hurried  away  into  the  street.  He  strolled 
down  it  with  a  firm  stride.  There  was  a  step  behind  him, 
and  a  Maltese  voice  eager  and  hoarse,  said — 

"  Signor,  where  you  been  ?77 

He  turned  sharp  round,  and  saw  a  young  and  brawny 
Maltese  before  him,  who  retreated  a  stride,  and  kept  a 
black  and  glowing  eye  upon  his  face. 

"  Where  have  I  been,  you  infernal  rascal  of  a  smytch, 
what's  that  to  you  ?'7 

"  Curse  you  all !  that7s  the  way  of  you  all,  with  your 
7fernal  ways  and  7fernal  tongues.  By  G — d,  a  knife  the  only 
thing  for  you  !  If  I  think  you  play  your  impudent  tricks 
with  Signora  Marie,  I  put  knife  in  you,  by  G — d,  Signer. 

*  Verbatim  from  Forbessy's  papers.— ED. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  15 

You  go  make  love  to  your  English  lady ;  leave  Maltese 
lady  alone  !" 

As  Fitz-Gubin  afterwards  told  his  friends,  the  closing 
sentence  of  this  "  rascal's"  speech  was  enough  to  make  any- 
body laugh. 

"You  impudent  scoundrel,  take  yourself  off,"  he  said. 
"  Fll  have  you  hanged,  sir,  if  you  talk  to  me  1" 

"  You  been  see  Signora  Marie  ?" 

"  How  dare  you,  sir  ?"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  sincerely  indig- 
nant at  the  fellow's  impudence. 

"  Antonio  I"  cried  the  Maltese.  A  figure  started  behind 
Lord  Alfred.  He  started,  too,  to  meet  it — but  a  blow  from 
behind  fell  with  a  heavy  force  upon  his  head,  and  he  sank  to 
the  ground. 

Let  us  return  to  Mula's  cafe. 

A  man  entered  the  cafe,  late,  whom  some  of  the  party 
there  knew — a  man  belonging  to  the  Yixen. 

"  Any  of  the  Sovereign's  fellows  here  ?"  said  he,  moisten, 
ing  a  cigar  in  his  mouth,  very  quietly,  and  sitting  down. 

"Yes,"  answered  Riddel.  "Yes,"  answered  Siddling- 
ton. 

"  Because,"  said  he,  "  there's  one  of  your  fellows  lying 
bleeding  in  a  street  near  the  Lascares.  I  advise  you  to 
look  after  him." 

"  The  devil  there  is  !"  said  the  two  gentlemen,  suddenly 
starting  up. 

When  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  came  to  himself,  he  found  him- 
self lying  in  his  hammock,  on  board  the  Sovereign,  with  a 
wet  cloth  on  his  head. 


76  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;  -OK, 


CHAPTER    III 

FITZ-GUBIN'S  head  (for  reasons  which  I  need  not  enlarge 
upon)  did  not  suffer  any  permanent  injury,  or,  indeed,  any 
serious  hurt  on  this  unfortunate  occasion.  He  was  a  little 
puzzled  when  he  came  to  himself  at  first,  and  found  a  sen- 
try near  him,  who  immediately  reported  his  recovery  to  the 
assistant-surgeon.  That  officer,  MacStirk,  was  instantly  at 
his  side  to  see  how  the  case  was  going  on,  and  to  administer 
a  draught.  Next  morning  Fitz-Gubin  was,  of  course,  re- 
ported in  the  sick  list ; — "  Contusion — a  little  fever — quiet," 
said  the  surgeon.  So  the  patient  took  up  his  abode  in  that 
cabin  on  the  main-deck  which  we  are  already  acquainted 
with — decidedly  pale  arid  seedy,  and  with  an  awkward  clot 
in  his  hair,  testifying  to  the .  smartness  of  the  tap  on  his 
skull,  but  not  in  any  danger.  Here  he  spent  his'  time  in 
bed  all  day,  near  the  cool  port-hole,  and  opposite  the  engrav- 
ing of  the  brigand  and  his  daughter — an  object  of  interest 
and  sympathy  to  his  friends. 

What  had  happened  ? — that  was  the  question,  as  people 
justly  remarked.  He  had  been  dining  at  the  Admiral's  : 
"Couldn't  have  had  too  much  to  drink  there!"  remarked 
Pug  Welby,  satirically,  when  he  heard  the  story.  "  A  row 
with  the  police,"  said  others,  as  if  that  were  a  matter-of- 
course  affair,  which  it  ought  not  to  be  in  a  well-regulated 
squadron.  "  Fell  from  his  horse,"  Cuckles  reported,  appa- 
rently by  authority.  The  surgeon,  no  doubt,  knew  whether 
the  contusion  was  such  as  a  fall  from  a  horse  would  cause. 
MacStirk,  with  his  usual  ignorance  of  the  world,  must  needs 
blurt  out,  when  the  Commander  put  it  carelessly  to  him  and 
the  Surgeon  together  (for  Cuckles  had  been  chatting  with 
the  Commander  just  before),  "whether  Lord  Fitz-Gubin 
had  hurt  himself  by  a  fall?" — that  it  was  "more  of  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  77 

nature  of  a  varra  severe  bruise,  such  as  a  maan  with  a 

rung He  beg-ged  pardon,  he  meant  a  stick  !" — but  the 

Surgeon  cut  this  bore  short,  and  left  the  Commander  to 
take  his  own  view  of  it.  So  the  Commander  did  ;  and  a 
charming  little  narrative,  investing  the  accident  with  the 
hues  of  imagination,  reached  the  Admiral's  house.  Poor 
Lord  Alfred  had  had  a  severe  fall  (these  Maltese  streets 
are  notoriously  dangerous  to  one  unused  to  them),  and  the 
Misses  Wyomings  sent  him  works  to  read  when  convales- 
cent, including  tracts,  which  found  their  way  to  the  gun- 
room, and  excited  wonder  and  admiration  there.  The 
"Mariner  Rescued"  (2d)  was  one  of  these,  and  an  effort 
was  made  to  bring  its  influence  to  bear  on  Bung,  the  mas- 
ter's assistant — of  course  without  any  success — by  the 
midshipmen.  But,  indeed,  there  is  no  want  of  works  calcu- 
lated to  awaken  the  nautical  mind  among  those  supplied  by 
Government,  if  they  are  brought  up  from  the  hold — a  pre- 
liminary which  I  have  known  to  be  neglected  in  some  of 
Her  Majesty's  ships  and  vessels  of  war. 

It  is  to  be  supposed  that  Riddel  and  that  set  guessed  more 
accurately  than  the  multitude  the  nature  of  Fitz-Gubin's 
misfortune.  Cuckles  was  with  him  the  very  next  morning 
when  he  had  moved  into  the  main-deck  cabin,  and  Fitz- 
Gubin  then  said,  with  a  feeble  voice,  "You  won't  let  me  be 
disturbed,  Cuckles  ? — Don't  let  us  have  the  fellows  eating 
ice,  and  joking  that  old  French  Maltese  in  here,  like  a  good 
fellow  !"  Cuckles  promised  faithfully  that  he  would  see  that 
nothing  of  the  sort  happened.  In  a  few  days,  when  he  was 
better,  and  some  of  the  set  were  sitting  with  him,  be  began 
to  talk  a  little  more  freely  of  his  accident.  He  "  had  met  a 
girl,  and,  by  Jove,  he  was  talking  to  her " 

"  Whereabouts  ?"  asked  Siddlington. 

"  Oh,  why,  you  know  I  don't  know  Yaletta  well. .  But  I 
had — somewhere  near  the  market,  I  fancy — met  her  ;  and 


78  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

she  had  just  gone,  when  this  confounded  cad — by  Jove,  I 
never  read  of  such  insolence — must  needs  accost  me  :  and 
what  do  you  think  he  said  ? — '  Go  make  love  to  English 
lady  ;  leave  Maltese  lady  alone  1" 

Riddel  and  Siddlington  roared  with  laughter,  and  the 
speech  of  the  smytch  was  pronounced  one  of  the  most  char- 
acteristic lately  produced  by  the  island.  Fitz-Gubin  leaned 
back,  and  grinned  at  the  reminiscence.  "I  was  so  taken 
aback  by  the  extraordinary  insolence  of  the  fellow,"  he  con- 
tinued, "  that  I  did  not  notice  a  man  who  must  have  been 
lurking  in  the  neighborhood,  and  who  suddenly  gave  me  a 
blow " 

"Ice  to-day,  Messieurs'?"  said  a  voice  at  the  door;  and 
there  appeared  the  meek  but  not  vulgar  head  of  old 
Polonai. 

Cuckles  was  going  to  expel  the  speaker,  in  spite  of  his 
age  and  reputed  nobility  of  extraction,  summarily  ;  but 
Fitz-Gubin,  coloring  slightly  as  he  saw  him,  called  him  in. 

"  Ah,  the  Sieur  de  Polonai !"  said  Riddel.  "  Well,  Polo- 
nai, musing  on  the  downfall  of  the  noblesse,  eh?  An  ice, 
Polonai.  When  Henri  returns,  we  shall  have  Polonai  on 
his  legs  again." 

The  old  fellow,  seasoned  to  chaff,  having  been  trained  like 
a  war-horse  to  stand  that  fire,  by  the  experience  of  innumer- 
able ships  on  board  which  he  had  carried  the  ice-can,  went 
on  filling  the  glass  with  perfect  composure. 

"  Thanks,  Seigneur  de  Polonai  !  Merd !  You  know, 
Polonai,  your  order  brought  their  exile  on  themselves  by 
their  infernal  tyranny,"  went  on  the  lively  Riddel.  "  I  can 
just  fancy  old  Polonai  wopping  a  vassal  I" 

Polonai  grinned  in  his  mild  manner. 

"  An  ice  for  me,"  said  Fitz-Gubin. 

Polonai  worked  away  with  the  spoon  in  the  crimson  mass, 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  19 

pleasant  to  the  eye  as  to  the  tongue,  and  handed  one  to 
him.  As  Fitz-Gubin  raised  himself — 

"  You  ill,  Signor  V  Polonai  said,  glancing  at  his  bound- 
up  head.  Fitz-Gubin  colored  a  little,  and  nodded.  Polo- 
nai looked  at  him ;  you  would  have  been  surprised  to  see  so 
much  interest  in  that  tame  old  face.  He  had  a  soft  and 
even  refined  empressement  (don't  sneer,  Tompkins,  please!) 
in  his  manner,  as  he  bowed  at  the  side  of  the  sofa,  and  pre- 
sented Fitz-Gubin  with  the  ice.  When  he  drew  back,  and 
stood  modestly  beside  his  can,  you  might  have  noticed  that 
his  eye  rested  rather  frequently  on  Fitz-Gubin. 

The  side  was  piped.  The  Captain  was  coming  on  board 
to  hear  complaints,  which  had  accumulated  since  his  last 
visit  from  his  house  on  shore.  The  Commander  had  sum- 
moned all  culprits,  and  the  regular  old  routine  was  being  gone 
through ;  a  marine  who  had  polished  off  a  corporal — a 
seaman  or  two  who  have  got  drunk,  and  told  the  officer  of 

the  watch  they  would  see  him  d d  first,  are  waiting 

judgment.  But  the  gun-room  mess  are  summoned  to  an 
interview  with  the  Captain  in  the  Admiral's  cabin,  regard- 
ing the  carrying  of  an  instrument,  known  as  a  "colt," 
which  has  been  applied  to  a  meagre  and  pallid  youngster, 
who  has  complained  of  the  same.  So  away  go  the  cabin- 
party  ;  old  Polonai  has  glided  out  ;  Fitz-Gubin  has  just 
composed  himself  for  a  swsta,  with  a  handkerchief  over  his 
eyes,  when  the  door  is  very  gently  opened. 

He  drew  the  handkerchief  off  and  looked  up,  and  he  saw, 
entering  with  extreme  quietness,  and  closing  the  door 
behind  him,  old  Polonai. 

"  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,"  the  old  fellow  said  in  a  low  voice, 
"  you  got  that  wound  in  your  head  in  Strada  St.  Orsola  ! 
Hush,  milor,  I  am  a  very  old  man.  I  bear  you  no  ill-will, 
and  I  respect  your  nation.  One  word,  only,  Lord  Fitz- 


80  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

Gubin,  take  care  !  Not  what  I  might  do  I  threaten  yon 
with.  No,  I  am  a  poor  old  devil,  and  no  matter.  But,  my 
lord,  be  a  brave  man  and  respect  all  men's  rights  [" 

Fitz-Gubin  felt  his  throat  dry  as  he  was  going  to  speak, 
and  before  he  quite  recovered  from  that  effect,  and  from  a 
confusion  which  somehow  came  over  him,  the  old  man  dis- 
appeared. Fitz-Gubin  lay  there,  and  wondered  over  the 
speech — dozed  and  woke  up,  fancying  he  heard  him  at  his 
ear,  then  slept  deeper  and  found  himself  in  Strada  St.  Orsola, 
There  he  was  at  the  fountain,  and  Marie  sitting  near  him — 
her  eyes  on  some  object  on  the  opposite  side — and  never  look- 
ing at  him,  and  the  fountain  seemed  to  fill  up  with  water  sud- 
denly, and  out  of  it  came  somebody  who  was  his  father  and 
old  Polonai  in  one,  in  some  unaccountable  manner.  Then 
he  was  at  Castellan,  at  home,  and  wandering  round  the  old 
mausoleum  where  the  Castellans  used  to  be  buried  in  the 
olden  time,  and  he  was  going  to  be  buried  there,  and  thought 
it  very  odd  that  he  should  know  anything  about  it  ;  and 
just  as  the  Miss  Wyomings  were  putting  a  nosegay  into  his 
coffin,  and  Marie  taking  it  away  to  keep  as  a  souvenir,  he 
awoke.  The  ship's  bell  was  striking,  and  not  the  bell  of 
Castellan  church  tower,  and  the  afternoon  was  far  advanced. 
The  dream  impressed  him  a  great  deal — and  even  in  these 
anti-superstitious  days  a  dream  will  impress  people.  (Man- 
chester, to  be  sure,  expounds  the  vision  of  Jacob,  by  sup- 
posing him  to  have  taken  too  much  meat  for  supper  ;  it  is  a 
great  blessing  to  live  in  an  enlightened  age  !)  He  found  it 
necessary  to  cheer  himself  up  with  a  little  soda-water  and 
cura^oa,  and  the  word  being  passed  for  Hobb,  that  marine 
soon  brought  the  refreshment  from  the  gun-room — where, 
by  this  time,  the  cloth  was  laid  for  dinner,  and  the  stew- 
ard had  broken  off  the  composition  of  a  sonnet  to  his  mis- 
tress, to  indite  the  carte  for  the  day.  The  fragrant  and 
crisp  beverage  revived  Fitz-Gulin,  and  dinner  following — 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  81 

(at  which  Cackles  took  good  care  to  send  a  faithful  attend- 
ant with  plenty  of  the  Brimbousky  marine,  to  the  cabin) — he 
soon  only  remembered  the  dream  as  "  deuced  odd,"  and  the 
speech  of  old  Polonai  as  that  of  a  "queer  old  fellow.'7  As 
his  head  mended,  he  lay  there  and  meditated  on  little  Ma- 
rie, and  on  the  necessary  precautions  to  be  taken  for  the 
future,  against  violent  "cads."  For  indeed,  he  habitually 
considered  a  "  cad"  who  rivalled  him  in  these  affairs,  much 
as  a  kind  of  poacher — one  who  interfered  with  the  rights 
of  the  lord  of  the  manor. 

In  a  short  time  news  came  to  Malta — brought  by  a  young 
fellow  of  the  name  of  Forbessy — that  the  "Bloater"  had 
been  "  lost  "  on  the  coast  of  Spain  !  This  was  the  cause 
of  the  arrival  of  Scrymgeour  Forbessy,  Esq.,  in  Malta,  and 
his  subsequent  apparition  in  the  gun-room  of  the  "  Sove- 
reign "  one  fine  morning.  Open  flew  the  door,  and  in  stalked, 
to  the  astonishment  of  the  fellows  there)  including  the  con- 
valescent Fitz-Gubin),  a  long  youth  in  a  picturesque  but 
seedy  garb,  decidedly  resembling  that  of  a  Spanish  privateer. 

"  Why,  hillo-- who's  this  ?"  asked  old  Manton. 

"  Don't  you  know  me  ?  You  do,  Siddlington — Forbessy 
of  the  '  Bloater  ?' " 

"  The  devil !  so  it  is,  why,  what's  the  meaning  of  this 
rig?" 

"The  ' Bloater's '  lost,  Sir,"  cried  Forbessy,  flinging 
himself  on  a  chair.  "  Not  a  rag  of  my  traps  saved  ;  the 
officers  and  company  are  to  be  sent  for,  and  the  admiral 
must  send  a  craft  too,  to  bring  away  the  lower  masts  and 
rudder." 

"  Bring  a  bottle  of  porter  !"  cried  Siddlington,  with  pro- 
fessional zeal ;  "and  you — how  the  deuce  came  you  here?" 

"  Pappleton  sent  me  on,  in  a  Spanish  merchant  schooner, 
and,  'gad,  I  had  to  borrow  a  rig  from  the  skipper,  and  I 
figure  for  the  present  as  Antonio  Perez." 

4* 


82  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"Pappleton's  smashed  then,  by  Jove/7  said  a  midshipman. 

"  Nay  ;  they'll  try  Mrs.  Pappleton,  my  dear  fellow,"  Pug 
Welby  said. 

"  Well,  Fm  d— d,"  old  Manton  began  ;  "  they  can't  keep 
a  ship  in  the  service,  now,  by  the  blazes  they  can't.  That's 
the  third  ship  there's  been  lost  since  the  beginning  of  the 
commission.  I  don't  know  what  the  service  is  coming  to. 
There  won't  be  a  ship  left  to  do  the  work  of  the  station, 
soon.  I'll  be  hanged  if  the  men  that  are  appointed  now-a- 
days  know  how  to  keep  a  ship  afloat.  The  service  is  changed 
since  I  joined,  I'm  hanged  if  it  ain't !  There  was  Tails  ;  he 
had  the  Fizgig  in  the  Baltic  in  1814,  and  he  took  her  off  a 
lee  shore — blowing  ;  by  the  Lord,  it  did  blow  in  those  days  ! 
and,  by  Jove,  I  say  Tails — he  brought  the  Fizgig  safe  and 
sound  home  to  Spithead.  Why,  they  knew  how  to  do  it  in 
1814;  but,  now,  the  longer  I  live,  the  worse  the  service  gets." 

That  Manton  could  have  continued  in  this  strain  all  day 
long,  anybody  who  remembers  the  venerable  mate,  will  at 
once  agree ;  the  key-note  (that  is,  the  few  simple  words 
which  begin  the  harangue)  once  struck — off  he  went ;  and 
instantly,  Siddlington  winked  at  Riddel — Pug  nudged  Lati- 
mer — the  youngsters  playfully  capered  behind  his  chair,  and 
various  exhibitions  of  comic  delight  began.  When  he  stop- 
ped, everybody  felt  that  a  familiar  bit  of  fun  had  terminated  : 
and  then  old  Manton,  wagging  his  broad  coat  tails,  disap- 
peared ;  Fitz-Gubin  watching  his  movements  as  a  dillettante 
stares  at  the  ribs  of  some  fossil  ante-diluvian.  "Bravo, 
Manton,"  Latimer  cried ;  and  as  the  door  closed  behind 
the  veteran,  Beaulieu  looked  up  (having  heard  the  oration, 
with  his  eyes  fixed  on  the  page  of  a  novel,)  ejaculated — 
"Rum  old  cock  !"  and  returned  to  his  favorite  writer  I 

"Go  on,  Forbessy,"  Siddlington  said.  "Capital  porter 
that — I  think  ?  We  haven't  room  for  above  fifty  dozen  of 
it— without  displacing  the  Madeira  !" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  83 

"  I'll  go  on,  my  dear  fellow ;  but  I  feel  a  barbarian  in 
this  garb.  I  shall  have  to  borrow  a  rig  from  you — we're 
just  about  a  size — till  Darba  can  make  me  something.  I've 
forwarded  Pappleton's  despatches  on  to  the  Admiral,  and 
he  will  likely  send  for  me,  to  examine  me  about  the  matter 
in  person ;  you  know  it  won't  do  to  appear  before  him  as 
Antonio  Perez." 

"Thatrs  true ;  come  on  to  the  -cock-pit,"  said  the  good- 
natured  Siddlington. 

"This  will  be  a  serious  matter  for  Darba!"  said  Pug 
Welby,  with  gravity. 

"Gad,  I  don't  know.  Except  Forbessy — none  of  the 
'  Bloaters7  look  like  Christians,"  observed  Riddel. 

A  quarter  of  an  hour's  lapse  brought  Mr.  Forbessy,  look- 
ing like  the  professional  Forbessy  of  every-day  life,  to  the 
gun-room  again.  It  was  about  lunch-time,  and  a  hot  lunch 
was  not  tardy  in  coming,  accordingly. 

"You  won't  be  sorry  to  get  a  beefsteak,  or  a  quail  on 
toast,  again,  Forbessy  ?'•'  said  Siddlington. 

"Not  I — though  quails  were  never  common  in  the 
Bloater.'" 

"No  quails?"  Riddel  said. 

"No  quails,"  replied  Forbessy,  gravely.  "But  a  steak, 
after  the  wretched  oily  messes  of  my  friend  Perez,  won't  be 
amiss." 

So  saying,  Mr.  Forbessy  seated  himself  at  a  table,  and 
seized  a  knife  and  fork  with  the  glorious  inspiration  of  sea 
air,  since  4  A.  M.,  stirring  in  him.  The  languid  youths,  who 
had  been  three  months  in  harbor,  envied  him  that  ogre- 
like  appetite. 

"I  should  like  an  ice,"  a  youngster  said,  discontentedly ; 
"but  there's  no  getting  an  ice  to-day,  unless  you  send  a 
man  on  shore  on  purpose  1  Old  Polonai  is  gone." 

Fitz-Gubin  looked  up.    It  was  the  first  moment  he  had 


84  SWELL-LIFE    AT   SEA;    OR, 

exhibited  any  animation  for  an  hour-and-a-half.  Perhaps 
he  felt  bored  by  seeing  a  stranger  attract  so  much  attention 
as  Forbessy  had  been  doing  ;  perhaps  he  was  amused,  and 
not  bored,  by  the  county  paper  from  home,  which  he  was 
lounging  over.  Even  the  family  of  which  Fitz-Gubin  is  a 
member,  must  tire  of  that  paper,  I  think ;  though  it  every 
other  week  or  so  has  "  Rejoicings  at  Castellan — dinner  of 
the  noble  landlord's  tenants — Mr.  Kiss  in  the  chair — the  cloth 
being  removed,  and  the  nsual  toasts,  &c.,  <fcc.,  the  chairman 
gave  the  Noble  The,  &c,,  &c.,  (tremendous  cheers,)  the  young 
Lord  Evremond,  (great  cheering,)  the  Infant  Plantagenet, 
(renewed  and  enthusiastic  cheering,")  and  so  on,  on  good- 
ness knows  what,  and  how  many  occasions,  per  ann.  Even 
they,  I  remark,  must  tire  of  that  print,  and  its  sycophancy  ; 
and  probably  they  despise  it,  too.  But  this  is  a  digression. 

Fitz-Gubin,  I  repeat,  looked  up.  "  What  did  you  say 
about  Polonai,  youngster  ?" 

"  What  did  I  say  ?  I  said  he  was  gone  to  Marseilles, 
somebody  said."  The  youngster  was  as  cnrt  and  saucy  as 
a  youngster  in  the  " Sovereign"  dared  to  be  ;  for,  "con- 
found the  fellow  and  his  title,"  (the  youngster  afterwards 
observed  to  a  brother  juvenile,  during  a  smoke  "on  the  sly," 
at  the  main-deck  bow-port,)  "he  never  takes  any  notice  of 
your  existence,  except  just  at  his  own  convenience  ;"  and, 
true  enough,  several  people  did  make  some  such  complaint 
about  our  friend  Fitz-G.  He  lived  with  you,  breathed  the 
same  air  with  you,  yet  seemed  to  discover  you  as  if  you 
had  just  dropped  from  the  moon,  some  day,  suddenly — when 
you  could  be  made  useful  ! 

"  Now  for  the  loss  of  '  The  Bloater/  "  said  Siddlington,  as 
the  cloth  was  removed.  "  Let  me  give  you  a  drop  of  cura- 
qoa — just  a  globule,  if  you  like — and  give  us  the  story." 

There  were  not  many  men  left  in  the  mess,  and  Forbessy 
stretched  his  legs,  out,  and  was  just  beginning,  when  Lord 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  85 

Alfred  rose,  begged  pardon,  and  passed  out.  "  Hem  !" 
ejaculated  our  friend  Forbessy — who  was  an  off-hand,  open 
sort  of  fellow — "  Fve  been  boring  that  young  gentleman,  I 
fear.  Fve  seen  him  before,  somewhere,  too.  To  be  sure — 
I  remember — he  was  in  the  '  Cocytus/  when  she  broke 
down  some  time  ago,  before  our  last  cruise.  Would  you 
believe  it,  he  wanted  himself  and  his  traps  brought  in,  in 
our  pinnace,  before  the  mails,  if  I  remember  right  ?" 

Siddlington  smiled,  rather  faintly.  "  Oh,  I  dare  say  he 
was  gate  as  a  youngster,  you  know.  We — ah" — he  looked 
at  Riddel — "  we  find  him  a  good  enough  sort  of  a  fellow 
here."  Which  moderate  speech,  and  mild  appeal  to  Riddel, 
meant  that — that,  in  fact — we  were  of  rather  aristocratic 
tastes  in  the  "  Sovereign,"  but  that  we  were  not  tuft-hunt- 
ers !  Siddlington's  father  was  a  fashionable  physician — so 
his  family  had  lived  within  ear-shot,  and  within  the  parfum 
of  the  great  world,  at  all  events,  and  had  been  accustomed 
to  reverence  it  from  infancy. 

"  Lord  Alfred  Fitz-Grubin  is  a  young  man  of  great  pro- 
mise, a  great  family,  own  half shire,"  said  Cuckles,  with 

emphasis. 

" shire,  eh?"  said  Forbessy.  Then  he  relapsed  into 

thought  for  a  moment,  and  presently  laughed,  and  said, 
"  Oh,  I  know  who  he  is,  then  !  But,  however,  to  my  tale  ; 
I  won't  detain  you  long. 

"You  know  the  'Bloater'  was  sent  some  time  ago  to  Bar- 
celona. Mrs.  Pappleton  had  never  seen  Spain,  and  justly 
believing  it  to  be  one  of  the  most  romantic  countries  in 
Europe,  why  she  was  curious  to  visit  it  !  Accordingly, 
one  day  in  Dockyard  Creek,  when  I  was  in  charge  of  the 
watch,  I  received  a  note,  which  I  afterwards  preserved  as  a 
curiosity,  and  which,  I  fear,  must  have  perished  with  my 
kit.  It  was  addressed  to  'The  Officer  of  the  Watch,  Bloater? 
and  ran  thus  : — '  Mrs.  Pappkton  requests  that  the  Officer  of 


86  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

the  Watch  will  send  the  Pinnace  on  shore,  uith  the  mast  out.9 
I  always  obey  orders ;  so  I  did  send  the  pinnace,  and  it 
returned  with  a  cargo  of  bandboxes  arid  bundles,  and  a 
message  from  Madame,  by  the  coxswain,  that  we  were  to 
bend  the  studding-sail  gear  !  I  at  once  saw  that  we  were 
off,  and  soon  afterwards  the  commander  and  his  wife  camo 
on  board,  arid  we  got  under  weigh.  Time  at  sea  in  the 
Bloater  went  slowly  enough ;  Pappleton  and  his  relations 
(by  which  I  mean  nearly  all  the  officers  in  the  ship)  seemed 
to  enjoy  themselves  ;  but  for  a  private  gentleman,  uncon- 
nected with  the  '  Family/  a  '  Family  Ship'  is  at  best  a  dull 
residence.  I  was  duly  asked  to  dinner,  to  be  sure  ;  but  I 
do  not  take  any  special  interest  in  the  social  news  of  Pleb- 
Biddlecumb,  which  was  the  staple  subject  of  conversation. 
Once  in  a  way,  the  social  intrigues  of  a  second-rate  county 
town — how  the  respectabilities  there  try  to  keep  in  with  the 
county  gentry,  and  to  keep  out  retired  tradesmen  and 
farmers — may  be  curious.  Habitually,  such  topics  seem 
(to  me  at  least)  rather  stupid. 

"  We  left  Barcelona,  when  it  came  on  to  blow.  I  had 
the  middle  watch,  and  it  was  freshening  towards  morning, 
(as  is  the  wind's  way  in  the  Mediterranean, )  when  I  was 
relieved  by  Joe  Bluffett,  the  master,  who  always  kept  the 
morning  watch.  Joe  had  just  joined  us,  before  we  left — a 
bandy-legged,  silent  man,  of  heavy  aspect.  He  took  the 
telescope  from  you,  glanced  at  the  compass,  *  Hum,  Nor' 
and  by  West/  lays  her  course — hum — and  devil  a  word  of 
'  good  morning/  or  '  fresh  breeze/  or  anything  approaching 
to  human  communion.  He  called  Mrs.  Pappleton,  'Mann/ 
and  kept  out  of  her  way,  or  if  she  spoke  to  him  he  touched 
his  cap  and  answered  the  question,  and  sheered  off.  She 
called  him,  in  private,  '  the  bear/  and  Pappleton  took  a 
dislike  to  him. 

"  Well,  this  morning  that  I  am  speaking  of,  Bluffett  came 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  87 

up,  as  heavy  and  as  silent  as  ever,  and  did  not  seem  to  think 
it  was  blowing  a  bit.  Some  fellows  think  it  never  blows  in 
the  Mediterranean,  (if  they  had  been  on  the  coast  of  Syria 
in  the  winter  of  1840,  they  would  have  found  out  their  mis- 
take,) and  I  dare  say  Bluffett,  who  has  knocked  about  the 
planet  since  he  was  four  feet  high,  did  not  expect  much  from 
a  bit  of  a  breeze,  where  we  were.  He  took  the  glass  with 
the  customary  grunt,  and  I  went  off  to  my  hammock,  tired 
enough.  When  we  were  routed  out  at  five  bells,  I  found, 
as  I  had  expected,  the  breeze  much  higher,  and  then  began 
the  comforts  of  a  gale  in  a  small  craft — hammocks  below — 
such  an  atmosphere  and  such  a  deck — hatches  battened 
down — smoke  filling  the  lower  deck — black  and  white  Pap- 
pleton  prostrate  in  the  berth — the  mess-boy  crawling  aft 
with  some  coffee  and  ship's  biscuit  in  a  tin  pot ;  and,  when 
you'd  quitted  all  this  with  disgust,  the  moment  you  shot 
your  head  up  among  tarpaulins,  through  the  companion- 
way,  slash  went  the  spray  in  your  face — you  found  the  deck 
wet  fore  and  aft,  and  were  deafened  by  the  roar  and  shriek 
of  the  wind  through  the  gaunt  and  dripping  rigging  and 
bare-looking  masts. 

"The  first  day  the  wind  was  hot  and  unrefreshing — 
always  an  unpleasant  feature ;  and  at  sunset  there  was 
thunder  brewing.  The  horizon  was  black,  streaked  by  fly- 
ing masses  of  gray,  and  the  darkness  was  settling  well  down, 
when  a  window  seemed  suddenly  opened  in  the  horizon's 
wall — you  know  that  look  the  black  sky  has — a  lid  seems 
to  rise  and  quiver  for  an  instant,  disclosing  a  whole  region 
of  shuddering  fire — then  shuts,  and  the  thick,  sonorous  roll 
of  the  thunder  hurries  along.  The  close-reefed  main  topsail 
gleams  white  against  the  sky  with  intensity  for  a  minute ; 
then  a  pause  and  more  wind,  and  the  heavy  clatter  of  rain. 
The  lightning  showed  the  yellow  jaws  of  Pappleton  looking 
ghastly  indeed,  I  can  assure  you,  that  evening.  I  had  the 


88  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

first  watch,  and  Pappleton  stuck  pretty  close  to  me.  '  Bad 
night,  Mr.  Forbessy !  I  hope  Mr.  Bluffett  is  alive  to  the 
importance  of  looking  out.7  At  eleven,  being  near  his  lad- 
der, I  heard  a  faint  sound,  which  proved  to  be  the  cabin 
bell.  Mrs.  Pappleton  was  in  want  of  mulled  wine  !  Men 
were  moving  to  and  fro,  and  to  old  Bluffett's  inquiry  what 
was  the  matter,  I  heard  this  answer  given.  For  two  hours 
that  veteran  had  not  opened  his  mouth ;  he  ejaculated 
d— n! 

"  Next  day  passed,  and  the  third  day  of  the  gale  arrived, 
when  the  question  was,  '  where  were  we  V  l  Mr.  Bluffett ; 
where's  Mr.  Bluffett  V  was  perpetually  in  the  mouth  of 
Pappleton.  A  wag  among  the  crew  picked  up  the  expres- 
sion, and  as  I  was  passing  forward — and  as  a  huge  roll  of 
the  ship  capsized  half-a-dozen  basins,  out  of  which  the  men 
were  taking  their  pea-soup — I  heard  one  of  them  cry,  *  O 
Lord  !  where's  Mr.  Bluffett  ?'  and  the  laugh  that  followed. 
Pappleton,  meanwhile,  kept  descending  to  the  cabin  to 
pacify  Mrs.  P.,  and  coming  on  deck  to  see  the  master. 
Then  he  would  look  up  to  the  masts,  as  if  he  understood  all 
about  it,  (which  he  didn't,)  and  then  go  and  fiddle  about 
the  binnacle — having  a  notion  that  there  was  something 
wrong  with  the  compasses. 

"At  noon  it  was  whispered  about — and  reached  the  ears 
of  Mules,  who  brought  it  to  our  dog-hole  of  a  berth  (you 
should  have  seen  the  berth  by  this  time) — that  there  was  a 
difference  of  opinion  between  the  master  and  Pappleton. 
The  master  said  we  were  off  Los  Murnos,  and  Pappleton 
declared  we  were  fifty  miles  south  of  the  Reschio  Palado. 
The  boatswain,  Crabb,  communicated  his  opinion  to  me, 
gratuitously,  that  they  '  was  neither  of  them  right,  or  he'd 
be  d — d/  and  indulged  in  the  gloomiest  prophecies.  When 
I  went  up  to  keep  the  4  to  6, 1  found  old  Bluffett  and  Pap 
pleton's  controversy  coming  to  a  crisis. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  89 

"  'Mr.  Bluffett,  I'll  wear  and  keep  her  W.S.W ;  there's 
an  error  in  the  compass  of ' 

"  '  It's  my  opinion,  Capt.  Pappleton,  that  you  are  mis- 
taken. I  beg  distinctly  to  recommend ' 

"  'Wear  ship,  Mr.  Forbessy,'  said  Pappleton. 

"'Then,  Captain  Pappleton,  I  must  beg  to  give  up 
charge,7  says  the  master. 

"  '  Eh  ?  Here.  Stop,  Mr.  Forbessy,'  and  again  he  was 
undecided.  (You  know  we  had  a  talent  for  losing  our  way 
in  the  '  Bloater.'  I  have  known  her  dodge  round  and  round 
Malta,  without  finding  it,  before  now.)  He  then  consulted 
Hackles,  the  First  Lieutenant,  and  it  seems  that  he  agreed 
with  him,  for  when  I  was  swallowing  some  tea  about  seven, 
I  heard,  '  Wear  ship  !'  The  last  thing  I  heard  before  turn- 
ing in,  was  that  the  wind  had  abated,  and  sea  too,  and  that 
we  were  running  before  it. 

It  was  about  eleven  at  night  when  I  awoke  with  a  start, 
and  fancied  somebody  was  tugging  at  my  hammock.  By 
Jove  !  we  had  STRUCK:  A  man  who  has  felt  that  sensation, 
that  peculiar  electric  vibration  which  a  ship  gives  at  that 
moment,  will  not  readily  forget  it.  l  Hands  save  ship?  a 
voice  bawled  out  close  to  my  ear  ;  one  spring  into  my  trou- 
sers and  jacket,  and  I  was  up.  The  watch  below  were 
crowding  to  the  forecastle  ladder,  and  in  that  press,  '  O 
Lord !  where's  Mr.  Bluffett  ?'  was  again  heard  from  a  wag. 
The  ship  had  heeled  over,  and  there  she  lay,  head  on  to  a 
black-looking  coast,  and  thump,  thumping  as  the  sea 
rolled  in. 

Hackles  was  giving  orders  when  I  got  to  the  quarter- 
deck ;  but  Pappleton  was  in  an  abject  condition — as  well 
the  poor  fellow  might  be,  with  Mrs.  Pappleton  to  look 
after.  She,  however,  proved  the  trump  of  the  occasion, 
for  she  girded  herself  up  to  meet  it ;  and  while  P.  was  yel- 
low, and  in  that  confounded  state  of  indecision,  which  is 


90  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

his  habitual  plight,  she  backed  up  Hackles  with  might  and 
main,  and  urged  him  on.  But  the  *  Bloater '  will  never 
swim  again  I" 

Forbessy  paused  for  breath,  and  just  as  he  did  so,  the 
head  of  a  quartermaster  showed  itself  inside  the  gun-room 
door.  "  Mr.  Forbessy,  sir,  the  Commander  wants  you." 
Up  jumped  Forbessy,  and  when  he  reached  that  oflicer, 
found  that  he  was  required  to  attend  instanter  at  the  Admi- 
ral's, to  be  ready  to  answer  any  questions  about  the 
" Bloater"  which  might  be  put  to  him. 

"  This  is  a  very  serious  business,  sir,"  says  the  Com- 
mander, shaking  his  head. 

Indeed,  it  was  so.  The  service  had  lost  a  corvette, 
and — and — the  devil  of  it  was  that  a  relation  of  the  Admi- 
ral's commanded  her  !  I  tremble  for  Bluffett,  the  master, 
though  1 


CHAPTER    IY. 

FORBESSY  paces  along  the  street,  en  route  to  the  Admi- 
rals. You  have  had  a  glimpse  of  him  before,  I  think  ? 
He  is  tall,  has  a  lounging  walk  rather,  and  a  somewhat 
careless,  if  not  absent,  manner  in  ordinary ;  but  gather  up 
those  cords  of  manhood  when  OCCASION  comes,  and  you 
have  a  sinewy  force  of  a  man  !  A  certain  easy  refinement 
hangs  loose  about  him,  and  is  not  less  effective  for  being 
unconscious.  He  has  the  Northern  head,  and  Northern 
eyes  of  gray  blue — such  as  you  may  see  (planted  on  a  body 
well  able  to  take  care  of  the  same)  any  day  that  you 
choose  to  ramble  among  the  hills  and  dales  of  the  Nith,  or 
in  the  valleys  of  Cumberland.  He  has,  likewise,  an  under- 
lying seriousness,  (not  of  the  tract  species,  but  human  and 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  91 

natural,)  becoming  a  man  who  wishes  to  do  something  in 
the  world,  and  in  an  age  which  seems  inclined  to  break 
loose  from  all  hereditary  and  traditional  ideas — to  preserve, 
at  all  events,  a  vigorous  personality. 

Forbessy  gained  the  house.  The  brilliant  Koribel  re- 
ceived him,  and  showed  him  into  a  waiting-room — justly  so 
called,  as  he  presently  found.  Nobody,  of  course,  had  any 
attentions  to  show  to  our  friend,  who  was  scarcely  known 
in  the  squadron  or  the  island — a  mere  midshipman  of  the 
11  Bloater,"  in  fact !  The  door  opened,  and  a  servant 
looked  in,  and  went  out  again ;  came  in  once  more  and 
locked  up  something — the  Marsala  perhaps  !  Half-an-hour 
afterwards,  a  cat  began  to  scratch  at  the  outside  of  the 
door,  which  was,  at  least,  an  incident.  A  quarter  of  an 
hour  passed,  and  a  light  laugh  was  heard  on  the  stair,  of 
which  his  imagination  might  make  the  most.  Then  Miss 
Wyoming  and  a  sister  came  in  with  a  mighty  jingling  of 
keys,  and  taking  no  more  notice  of  our  friend  than  if  he 
had  been  an  arm-chair,  retreated  again  with  the  aforesaid 
Marsala — a  fact  which,  combined  with  the  distant  odor  of 
roast  mutton,  seemed  to  show  that  it  was  now  dinner  time. 
At  last,  Roribel  bounced  in  suddenly,  "This  way,  Mr.," 
(he  had  forgotten  the  name  already,)  and  Forbessy  was 
shown  in  to  the  Admiral,  who  was  poring  with  aged  eyes 
over  papers. 

"Thit  down,  thir." 

Forbessy  sat  down,  while  the  old  man  stared  at  the  pa- 
per, and  in  a  few  moments,  "Tho,  it  theems,  the  'Bloater' 
ith  lost  ?  Sthand  up,  thir  I" 

Forbessy  stood  up. 

"  How  did  you  leave  them  ?" — Forbessy  replied. 

"  Who  wath  in  charge  of  the  watch  when  she  struck  ? 
You,  thir  ?" 

"  JSTo,  Sir  B "  and  he  told  him.     It  was  one  of  "  the 


92  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Family,"  unfortunately.     I  wonder  if  the  Admiral  wished 
it  had  been  Forbessy  ? 

"  Hem."  The  Admiral  fumbled  a  little  with  the  papers, 
turned  his  faint  and  dim  eyes  up  and  rubbed  them,  asked 
another  question  or  two,  and  dismissed  Mr.  Forbessy,  who 
was  to  be  borne  on  the  books  of  the  "  Sovereign,"  till  Cap- 
tain Pappleton  and  his  gallant  crew  arrived  in  Malta  for 
trial.  Thus  was  Forbessy  brought  within  Fitz-Gubin's 
sphere  of  action,  but  for  which  circumstance  the  public 
might  never  have  heard  of  the  career  of  that  great  aris- 
tocrat. 

****** 

Fitz-Gubin  was  now  recovered  from  the  effects  of  his 
accident,  and  showed  himself  (one  often  wondered  why  he 
made  no  charge  for  the  exhibition)  on  deck,  and  on  shore, 
in  his  usual  health.  His  head-quarters  on  shore  continued 
to  be  the  Mitre,  and  there,  if  he  was  not  inclined  to  go  off 
to  dinner,  he  dined.  He  had  a  running  account  at  the 
Mitre.  He  had  a  running  account  with  Squirrel  for  horses. 
He  played  a  good  deal  at  billiards.  He  also  played  a  good 
deal  at  the  Cafe  Yerdanti : — not  at  your  absurd  and  stupid 
dominoes,  but,  up  stairs,  in  the  room — in  the  private  room, 
in  fact,  where  only  a  select  party  assembled,  and  where 
there  was  some  excitement  to  be  had.  Roribel  and  others 
met  others,  and  it  was  four  in  the  morning  before  they 
supped  and  broke  up,  so  that  Fitz-Gubin  sometimes  reached 
the  "  Sovereign,"  just  as  the  hands  were  turned  up,  to  exer- 
cise loosing  sails.  On  these  occasions,  he  popped  on  blanket 
trousers,  a  jacket,  and  cap,  and  attended  to  his  duty ; — 
sleeping  all  day  afterwards  as  you  may  easily  believe.  The 
advantage  of  sleeping  all  day  obviously  is,  that  you  are 
lively  at  night  time  ;  and  thus,  when  the  excellent  cuisine 
of  the  gun-room  had  set  him  up,  he  was  just  in  the  humor 
to  go  on  shore  again.  There  was  a  good  deal  of  luxury 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  93 

and  idleness  going  on  about  this  time ;  and  several  times 
had  the  Admiral  launched  " general  orders"  on  the  subject. 
These  compositions  are  the  " Bulls"  of  the  navy.  They 
were  favorite  compositions  with  the  Admiral,  who,  in  the 
consciousness  of  great  literary  talent,  (arid  upon  my  word 
any  literary  man  might  envy  an  author  who  had  the  power 
to  make  people  read  him  !)  always  proluded  at  great  length, 
and  with  a  magnificence  of  language  worthy  of  a  better 
cause.  To  be  sure  his  eloquence  was  a  trifle  wasted  on 
some  fellows,  but  what  can  you  expect  ?  Here,  the  mess 
are  lounging  about  the  gun-room  in  the  forenoon.  Looking 
through  the  stern  port,  Clare  observes  answering  pendants 
flying  up,  and  knows  the  "  Sovereign"  is  signalling.  Pres- 
ently boats  shoot  out  from  under  the  great  sides  of  the  line- 
of-battle  ships,  and  midshipmen  come  on  board  to  copy  a 

GENERAL     ORDER. 

"  The  maintenance  of  that  unsullied  excellence  of  disci- 
pline, which,  whatever  form  it  may  assume,  is  the  chief  cha- 
racteristic of  advanced  perfection  in  a  squadron  of  His 
Majesty's  ships,  is  not  compatible  with  a  high  scale  of  per- 
sonal extravagance  on  the  part  of  junior  officers. 

"The  Commander-in-Chief,  Sir  B.  B.,  K.C.T,  G.G.H., 
has  observed  with  regret,  that  this  salutary  knowledge — if 
that  can  be  called  knowledge,  which  is  obviously  imperfectly 
apprehended  by  those  whom  it  most  behooves  to  know  it — 
is  not  diffused  in  the  squadron  under  his  command,  or  if 
diffused,  has  not  penetrated  to  the  consciousness  of  officers, 
or  if  it  has  penetrated  to  the  consciousness,  has  not  yet 
availed  to  govern  the  conduct  of  officers ;  he  therefore  is 
compelled  again  to  address  some  observations  on  this  impor- 
tant subject  to  the  officers  under  his  command. 

"The  Commander-in-Chief,  Sir  B.B.,  K.C.T.,  G.G.H., 
therefore  proceeds  to  propound " 


94  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

But,  bless  you,  our  venerable  friend  could  go  on  in  this 
style  to  any  extent,  as  might  be  proved,  did  we  choose  to 
avail  ourselves  of  a  collection  of  his  documents — very 
kindly  placed  at  our  disposal  by  a  butterman.  Suffice  it, 
that  the  old  gentleman  made  various  efforts  to  control  the 
exuberance  of  the  youth  under  his  command — with  what 
success  people  acquainted  with  the  subject  know. 

One  of  these  great  lucubrations  reached  the  "  Sovereign" 
one  day  about  noon  from  the  Admiral's  office,  and  with  it  a 
private  note  from  Roribel  to  Fitz-Gubin,  of  very  elegant 
appearance,  and  perfumed,  so  that  it  justly  excited  the 
scorn  of  Bung,  whom  Cuckles  sent  below  with  it,  and  from 
whom  Fitz-Gubin  received  it.  His  formal  "Thank  you, 
Mr.  Bung,"  made  Bung  secretly  writhe  ;  but  we  must  not 
be  detained  by  Bung,  who,  indeed,  has  returned  to  the 
main-deck,  to  see  the  spirits  served  out,  as  becomes  his 
rank. 

"  DEAR  FITZ-GUBIN — It  is  complained  that  you  never  call 
here,  and  you  know  what  Chesterfield  says* — '  Women 
make  no  allowance  for  business  or  laziness.'  I  think  this 
fine  day  ought  to  tempt  you ;  we  can  have  a  ride,  after- 
wards, somewhere  ;  and  unless  you  are  in  a  hurry  '  off '  at 
night,  we  can  give  Pump  his  revenge.  Bolus  is  boring 
the  dock-yard  people,  so  don't  be  afraid  of  him. — Ever, 

"  R.  R." 

Fitz-Gubin  seemed  to  approve  of  the  suggestion,  for  he 
was  seen,  half-an-hour  afterwards,  strolling  along  the  Strada 
Reale. 

Fitz-Gubin  was  one  of  those  fellows  who  are  never,  what 
you  might  really  and  truly  call,  intimate  with  anybody — not 
even  .with  a  mistress.  Any  decent  intimacy  of  heart  and 

*  Fitz-Gubin  did  not  know  that  Chesterfield  had  made  that  remark  • 
but  Eoribel  knew  it  would  please  him  to  be  thought  to  know  it. — ED. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  95 

cordiality  was  unknown  to  his  nature  ;  but  for  all  that  he 
could  be  friendly  and  easy  enough.  To  please  himself,  he 
could  be  handsomely  liberal  at  times  ;  and  if  he  sometimes 
took  even  elaborate  pains  to  win  a  pretty  girl,  whom,  after 
all,  he  had  nothing  worthy  the  name  of  a  passion  for,  he 
could  be  generous  and  lavish  of  everything  but  heart  !  He 
was  cold ;  but  then  there  are  different  sorts  of  coldness. 
The  coldness  of  marble  one  can  admire  ;  but  there  is  a 
coldness  which  affects  others  with  dulness,  while  the  being 
itself  has  a  liveliness  and  warmth  for  its  own  purposes. 
The  eel  is  cold  ;  but  how  active  its  vital  principle — how  it 
can  enjoy  its  mud. 

I  know  not  why  I  broke  into  this  paragraph  so  suddenly  ; 
but  it  may  be  useful ;  let  it  stand.  Yet,  do  not  fancy  that 
I  would  have  you  picture  young  Fitz-Gubin  as  one  of  your 
absurd,  unnatural  abstractions  of  calculating  coldness,  only  ; 
his  look  might,  perhaps,  make  you  think  better  of  him 
than  my  words  have.  Here  he  is — there  is  a  fresh,  soft 
look  about  him,  and  his  big  blue  eyes  seem  harmless,  as  he 
knocks  at  the  Admiral's  door. 

Miss  Wyoming  was  glad  to  see  him  looking  well,  still, 
and  so  was  Adeline  Wyoming,  who  had  a  most  innocent 
admiration  of  aristocracy,  and  thought  that  every  "lord" 
was  necessarily  the  direct  descendant  of  William  the  Con- 
queror. And  so  both  chatted  away,  of  course  not  forget- 
ting the  poor  old  "  Bloater." 

"  So  provoking,"  said  Miss  Wyoming. 
"  I  always  thought  Mrs.  Pappleton  could  have  saved  the 
ship  if  needful,"  said  Adeline,  with  facetiousness.     "  But 
she  must  have  been  sleeping  on  the  watch,  as,  I  hear,  all 
you  sailors  do." 

"  That  depends  on  whether  we  have  anybody  to  think 
of,"  said  the  polite  Roribel,  who,  by-the-by,  thought  of 
very  few  people  indeed.  They  said  that  he  was  attached  to 


96  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Miss  Wyoming,  and  then  that  it  was  to  Adeline,  and  then 
that  it  was  to  Lilias,  but  nobody  knew  ;  and  Roribel  loved 
himself  better  than  all  three  put  together. 

"  I  wish  people  would  not  lose  ships,"  said  Miss  Wyo- 
ming ;  "  it  puts  uncle  out  so  much.  I  am  sure  these  horrid 
Courts-Martial  might  be  done  without,  if  people  would  take 
care.  Everything  would  go  on  happily, — and  poor  Captain 
Pappleton  is  invaluable  at  a  pic-nic." 

"  He  is  the  best  mixer  of  salads  I  know,"  said  Roribel, 
deliberately. 

"  He  is  a  kind  of  relation  of  ours,"  Adeline  remarks. 
(He  was  indeed.)  "A  most  good-natured  man,  Lord  Fitz- 
Gubin.  Pm  afraid  he'll  be  reprimanded.  So  unpleasant  " 

"If  it  doesn't  all  turn  out  to  be  the  master's  fault,"  said 
Roribel,  good-naturedly,  and  withdrew  on  business.  So  the 
conversation  ran  on,  on  other  topics,  among  the  three. 

"  I  hope  your  sister  is  very  well  ?"  Fitz-Gubin,  recollect- 
ing that  there  was  one  absent,  suddenly  said. 

Miss  Wyoming  looked  a  little  serious.  "  Lilias  is  em- 
ployed on  a  little  task  of  duty  to-day.  *  By-the-by,  Adeline 
dear,  perhaps  she  is  tired,  and  would  like  some  lunch." 

"You  know  we  endeavor  to  aid,  as  far  as  we  can,  our 
friend,  Mr.  Fatton,  in  his  endeavors  to  enlighten  the  poor 
people  here.  We  ought  not  to  spare  any  trouble  in  such  a 
task,  and  I  am  sure  this  poor  beautiful  child — 

The  door  opened,  and  Lilias  Wyoming  came  briskly  in, 
all  unconscious  of  a  visitor,  accompanied  by  MARIE  ! 

The  color  came  very  suddenly  to  our  friend  Fitz-Gubin's 
face  this  time,  you  may  be  sure.  "  Bless  me,  Lil — ,"  Miss 
Wyoming  was  going  to  have  exclaimed,  but  she  checked 
herself,  and,  rising  up,  with  the  best  air  of  ladylike  superi- 
ority and  Christian  patronage,  she  said  to  Marie,  in  Italian, 
"  I  hope  you  are  well,  child,  and  have  attended  to  Lilias. 
This  is  our  little  protegee,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  !" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  9t 

Marie's  large  and  solemn  dark  eyes  lighted  full  upon  him, 
and  Fitz-Gubin  bowed.  He  wondered  whether  she  remem- 
bered him.  He  was  silent,  and  Marie,  with  an  inclination 
of  her  head,  looked  very  simply  up,  and  said,  "  I  have  seen 
you,  Signor,  before.  Are  you  well  now  ?" 

"What?"  says  Miss  Wyoming,  looking  no  little  sur- 
prised. 

"  Oh,  I  can  explain  that,"  Fitz-Gubin  said.  "  I  thought 
I  remembered  the  face  !  The  day  of  my  accident,  you  know, 
Miss  Wyoming,  I  was  ill,  and,  passing  near  your  friend's 
house — at  least,  I  suppose  it  is  her  house — I  asked  for  water, 
and — and — she.  brought  it  1" 

Marie  stood  and  looked  at  him,  and  said  nothing — keep- 
ing her  quiet  magnetic  eyes  on  his  face, 

"Ah,"  said  Miss  Wyoming,  slowly ;  and  in  a  moment 
young  Marie  was  spirited  away  by  the  other  sisters.  Upon 
which  Fitz-Gubin  began  to  talk,  with  great  vivacity,  on  the 
subject  interrupted  by  her  arrival,  to  convince  Miss  Wyo- 
ming he  was  no  way  startled  by  the  incident ;  and  having 
prolonged  his  visit  to  the  furthest  verge  of  politeness,  he 
took  his  leave. 

"  What  a  pretty  girl  she  is,  to  be  sure  !"  he  soliloquized 
as  he  strolled  along.  "  I  only  saw  her  by  moonlight,  but 
she's  quite  as  lovely  by  daylight  too.  And  what  an  inno- 
cent goose  to  say  she  had  seen  me  before  there  !  But  it  was 
knowing  of  her,  to  say  nothing  when  I  gave  my  version  of 
the  business,  too.  She's  a  little  knowing  devil,  I  believe, 
after  all.  'Gad,  that  is  it !  I  never  took  such  a  fancy  to 
a  girl." 

After  this  fashion  mused  Fitz-Gubin,  till  he  almost 
tumbled  against  Riddel,  who  was  sauntering  along  the 
street. 

"Why,  you?re  in  a  brown  study,"  said  Riddel.  (He  might 
have  said?  more  accurately,  a  Hack  one  ! ) 

§ 


98  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"So  I  was,  indeed/'  They  joined  arms,  and  walked  on 
together. 

"  That's  a  pretty  ring  of  yours,  Riddel ;  where  did  you 
buy  it  r 

11  Oh  !  in  Malta  here — at  Greenstone's." 

"  I  wish  you  would  introduce  me." 

"With  the  greatest  pleasure,  let  us  go  at  once  I" 

Mr.  Greenstone  had,  not  very  long  before,  opened  a  jew- 
elry establishment,  and  he  had  a  highly  promising  business. 
He  was  the  most  enterprising  of  tradesmen  ;  he  added  a 
charm  to  his  gems  by  the  way  in  which  he  handled  them  to 
show  them,  and  would  have  laughed  at  the  notion  of  ready 
money.  Mr.  Greenstone  was  much  encouraged  in  Malta  ! 

When  Mr.  Greenstone  found  that  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  of 
the  "  Sovereign,"  was  the  gentleman  who  proposed  to  glance 
over  his  collection,  he  glided  about  like  a  gnome  in  a  mine. 
Gold,  and  silver,  and  jewels,  and  that  fine  filagree,  which  is 
as  delicate  as  hoar-frost,  fell  under  happy  lights,  and  glit- 
tered like  live  things.  Fitz-Gubin  and  Riddel  peered,  and 
admired,  and  compared.  Riddel's  taste  was  gross  rather  ; 
he  loved  much  gold  work,  and  bore  sometimes  in  front  of 
him  an  elaborate  barbarism  representing  a  battle-axe 
grasped  by  a  mailed  hand. 

Fitz-Gubin  selected  for  himself  a  ring,  and  then  seemed 
doubtful  what  to  do.  He  fidgetted  and  paused  :  but 
presently  Riddel  happened  to  go  to  the  door. 

"  Mr.  Greenstone,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  "send  that  bracelet 
to  me  at  the  Mitre  Hotel,  early  to-morrow."  He  moved  to 
the  door.  "  Ready,  Riddel."  "  All  right."  "  Come  along 
then."  And  away  they  went ;  Riddel  remaining  ignorant 
of  the  purchase  which  his  friend  had  just  made,  aud  to  make 
which  was  the  object  of  that  gentleman's  visit.  This  was 
iust  his  mysterious  way.  In  South  America,  men  who 
thought  him  an  ordinary  rone,  were  surprised  to  find  out 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  99 

every  now  and  then,  that  he  had  been  carrying  on  an  under- 
current of  plot  :  he  got  wounded  ;  or  a  consul  came  on 
board  storming  with  a  complaint ;  or  an  anonymous  letter 
threw  his  captain  into  fits  ;  or  he  lost  five  times  what  he 
could  afford  at  play,  and  the  "  family,"  as  usual,  had  to  do 
something.  Yet  happen  what  might,  he  was  ever,  out- 
wardly, the  same  indifferent,  every-day,  mawkish  Fitz-Gubin, 
and  carried  into  the  scenery  of  romance  the  person  of  an 
every-day  worldling.  He  sought  beauty  as  pertinaciously 
as  a  caterpillar  does  flowers,  and  with  scarcely  a  finer  feel- 
ing than  its  dull  greed.  But  enough  of  description  for  the 
present. 

Fitz-Gubin,  then,  and  Riddel  having  dined,  proceeded  to 
the  opera  and  stationed  themselves  in  the  pit.  Up  rose  the 
curtain  on  the  eternal  old  mediaeval  castle  of  the  establish- 
ment, and  enter  the  Baron  in  the  same  court-dress  obviously 
worn  by  his  ancestor  in  the  thirty  years'  war  !  The  second 
act  was  wearing  away,  when  Fitz-Gubin  gave  a  start,  and 
muttered  something.  Riddel  turned  to  see  what  was  the 
matter. 

"  Why,  Riddel,  do  you  see  that  d d  huntsman  in  the 

green  coat !" 

"  I  do." 

"That's  the  scoundrel  that  I  told  you  of,  who  was  so 
insolent  that  night." 

"  Is  it  ?"  says  Riddel,  with  -animation.  "  Bravo.  Now 
I'll  tell  you  what  I'll  do.  I'll  go  out  and  raise  the  fel- 
lows in  the  cafes,  and  by  the  toe  of  St.  Peter,  we'll  duck 
him  !  We'll  pin  him  at  the  stage  door,  and  bring  him 
off!" 

"  Hush,  man  ! — no,  no  I  Everything  will  come  out.  Sit 
down,  Riddel,  do  !" 

With  an  ill  grace  Riddel  (who  had  a  superfluous  amount 
of  champagne  in  his  veins)  composed  himself.  The  truth 


100  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OK, 

was,  that  Fitz-Gubin  instantly  divined  that  Marie  might  be 
in  the  house.  He  turned  cautiously  round,  and  everywhere 
sought  the  dark  eyes — the  eyes  compared  with  which,  Fitz- 
Gubin,  thy  soul  was  dull  !  From  box  to  box — from  row  to 
row,  his  vague,  eager  look  went.  Yet  he  missed  one  face  he 
knew.  Miss  Wyoming  was  there,  and  saw  him  ;  and  she 
watched  him,  too,  and  had  thought  of  the  scene  with  Marie, 
and  of  the  possible  interpretations  of  it,  oftener  than  he 
imagined.  As  soon  as  she  saw  his  inquiring  look,  she  took 
care  to  avoid  it,  and  keep  back,  but  not  without  a  watch 
upon  him. 

Fitz-Gubin  again  turned  to  the  play,  but  disappointed. 
The  music  rolled  over  him  like  mere  meaningless  noise.  He 
looked  with  a  calm,  dull  hate  and  scorn  at  the  Maltese  who 
had  brought  the  wound  upon  him,  and  thought  that  the 
beautiful  Marie  could  never  surely  love  that  poor  beast ! 

Meanwhile,  Mr.  Riddel,  of  whom  a  fixed  idea  had  taken 
possession,  (and  the  tenacity  of  one  idea  is  a  common  phe- 
nomenon among  the  results  of  too  much  wine,)  had  glided 
away  from  Fitz-Gubin's  side.  He  passed  quietly  through 
the  pit,  and  when  he  saw  a  man  he  knew,  he  telegraphed 
him  to  come  out.  Forbessy,  who  was  sitting  by  himself  in 
a  corner,  unobserved,  saw  individuals  here  and  there  whose 
faces  he  knew  as  naval  men,  stealing  away  to  the  doors. 
But  Forbessy  was  entranced  by  an  object  which  he  had 
just  seen  a  quarter  of  an  hour  before,  and  that  object  was 
one  that  long  afterwards  recurred  to  his  vision  among  the 
soul-and-body-oppressing  heats  of  African  Bights,  and  else- 
where. The  dull  vision  of  Fitz-Gubin  had  passed  over 
Marie,  after  all.  Forbessy  was  near  her,  and  if  ever  acci- 
dent but  let  a  glimpse  of  her  face  be  seen,  his  eyes  lighted 
upon  it,  and  watched  it  with  the  most  perfect  admiration 
which  a  face  had  ever  excited  in  him.  Yague  sadness  and 
still  worship  took  possession  of  him,  and  he  lingered, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  101 

resolved  to  know  who  could  be  so  beautiful  in  that  dull 
place,  where  his  heart  had  no  home. 

The  opera  was  over,  and  there  was  a  great  rush  and 
crowd  in  the  narrow  street,  where  caleches  were  crowding 
to  the  doors,  and  people  swarming  out.  Mr.  Riddel  had 
been  seen  during  the  past  half  hour  at  Mula's,  at  Micallef  7s, 
at  Ricardo's ;  and  a  whisper  had  gone  abroad  that  a 
"lark"  was  in  preparation.  A  party  had  gathered  under 
his  auspices,  and  was  gathered  together  near  the  scene  of 
action. 

" Miss  Wyoming's  carriage!"  bawls  out  a  servant,  and 
off  rumbles  the  caUche  of  the  Admiral. — "Sir  John  Sum- 
per's  carriage  !"  "This  way,  Sir  John."  "Good  night! 
Home!"  Next  carriage — doors  slammed.  "Out  of  the 
way,  Smytch,  d — n  you!"  " Beg  pardon,  sar /"  "Drive 
on  !"  Such  was  the  Babel  of  sounds  with  which  the  little 
opera  emptied  itself ;  and,  amidst  the  confusion,  Riddel  and 
his  party  had  assembled  rather  lower  down  the  street. 

Out  of  the  press,  in  deepest  mantilla,  shrouded,  passed  a 
figure  which  Forbessy  had  already  learned  to  know ;  and 
Marie,  with  quick,  small  steps,  moved  away  along  the  street. 
11  Shall  I  follow  her?"  he  thought.  "I  have  no  right  to 
follow  her  !  No  !  I  won't  destroy  the  picture  she  has  left 
in  my  imagination,  by  knowing  anything  of  her  but  that 
she  is  perfectly  fair." 

But  before  she  was  out  of  sight,  she  paused  and  stood 
still. 

"  Somebody  is  to  take  her  home,"  Forbessy  thought. 
"Poor  child  ! — Her  father,  I  hope.  I  would  not  like  to 
know  that  she  had  a  lover.  I  will  pass  by  her,  and  see  her 
face  once  more  !" 

The  crowd  was  now  thin,  and  the  street  becoming  de- 
serted. RiddcPs  eye  was  on  all  doors.  Out  came  a  Mal- 
tese from  one. 


102  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

"Hah  I"  says  Riddel,  "I  know  his  face  ! — Good  Szgnor 
Smytch,  a  word  with  yon,"  says  Riddel  to  the  young 
Maltese. 

"With  me!     What  you  want  with  me  ?" 

"Why,"  says  Riddel,  mimicking  him  with  the  most 
intense  contempt,  "I  want  duck  you  ford — d  impudence  to 
English  officer  some  weeks  ago  !  You  and  your  friend  hurt 
English  officer  ;  we  go  duck  you  I" 

With  a  waive  of  the  hand,  out  came  a  knife.  Riddel 
rushed  at  him,  and  seized  his  arm  with  a  gripe  of  iron  ; 
with  his  other  hand  he  seized  him  by  the  throat,  and 
squeezed  him  ;  the  Maltese's  struggles  were  awful !  Down 
came  the  knife  on  the  pavement  with  a  ring.  "Bravo!" 
was  the  cry.  Riddel  kicked  away  the  knife  with  his  foot, 
and  a  moment  afterwards,  down  they  both  went,  Riddel 
uppermost.  "  Police  !"  was  called  out ;  windows  flew  open ; 
rattles  were  sprung. 

"Now  I've  got  him  !"  Riddel  muttered.  "  Give  us  the 
lashing." 

In  a  few  instants  of  fiery  excitement  they  bound  and 
gagged  the  unfortunate  fellow.  He  was  Tioisted  aloft  by 
the  determined  band,  who  carried  him  bodily,  along  un- 
frequented streets,  to  the  harbor,  and  to  a  boat. 

It  is  not,  I  trust,  without  a  due  feeling  of  indigna- 
tion that  I  record  the  fact,  that  the  breaking  light  of  the 
next  morning  found  that  Maltese  exposed  on  the  fair-way 
buoy ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  103 


CHAPTER    Y. 

CUCKLES,  the  artful  and  worldly,  came  on  deck  next 
morning  early,  and  set  the  crew  to  work  at  the  holyston- 
ing and  other  processes  in  good  time.  For  that  useful 
mate  had  not  been  on  shore,  or  dissipating  the  previous 
evening.  He  had  taken  a  weak  glass  of  Marsala  and 
water,  with  his  cigar,  on  the  main  deck  (edging  in  his 
chair,  unobtrusively  and  modestly,  near  the  lieutenant's 
smoking  party,  so  that  he  was  asked  to  join  them,  and  did 
his  best  to  be  agreeable) — after  which  he  got  his  desk  out 
and  pottered  over  his  accounts  till  half-past  ten,  when  he 
went  to  bed,  cool,  calm,  and  with  a  conscience  at  rest  He 
was  not  a  rake,  nor  a  spendthrift,  nor  any  such  bad  man  ; 
but  was  only  a  hypocrite,  and  toady,  and  worldling,  and 
schemer,  and  very  much  respected  ! 

Cuckles  walks  about  the  deck,  while  the  sleepy  fellows 
huddle  up  the  hatchways  with  their  hammocks.  The  gray 
morning  fills  the  harbor  with  its  gradual  light,  and  the 
houses  of  Yaletta  loom  through  it,  looking  gray  too. 

The  quartermaster — steady  Marshall — turns  his  glass  on 
objects  far  and  wide,  and  has  never  his  eyes  away  for  many 
minutes  from  the  flag-staff  of  the  palace.  An  object 
attracts  that  glass  towards  the  harbor's  mouth — and 
again — and  once  again. 

Marshall  glided  down  the  starboard  poop-ladder  as  quickly 
and  quietly  as  the  fairy  in  a  burlesque — what  man  moves 
like  a  sailor  ?  He  reached  Mr.  Cuckles'  side.  "  Mr. 
Cuckles,  sir.  Fair-way  buoy,  sir !  Man  on  it,  I  think  1" 

Cuckles  took  the  glass  from  him,  without  speaking; 
looked,  and  said,  "Yes,  there  is.  Call  away  the  first  cut- 
ter ;  and  Marshall  go  for  Mr.  Leslie  Clare." 


104  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

Away  went  the  quartermaster.  The  youngsters  who 
were  puddling  about  the  deck,  barefooted,  (at  the  express 
command  of  Commander  Mutter,  a  sworn  foe  to  goloshes — 
on  youngsters,)  brightened  up  at  the  excitement  of  the 
news.  In  fire  minutes  the  blanket  trowsers  of  Leslie  Clare, 
Esq.,  appeared  on  deck,  that  young  gentleman  looking  very 
sleepy  and  glossy,  having  beeu  just  disturbed  in  a  dream, 
in  which  partridge  shooting  and  lunch  were  the  principal 
features.  Clare  and  Cuckles  never  wasted  words  on  each 
other ;  and  Clare  simply  marched  into  his  boat  to  obey 
orders.  "  Take  that  man  off  the  buoy,  and  land  him,"  said 
Cuckles  ;  and  Clare  shoved  off  to  do  it. 

"  Give  way,"  said  Clare,  and  off  started  the  boat. 

Here  was  a  spectacle  I  The  cutter's  crew  were  tittering, 
fore  and  aft,  as  they  drew  near  the  buoy.  It  bobbed  up 
and  down  in  the  water,  and  astride  on  it,  with  a  leg  on 
each  side  of  the  huge  ring — and  lashed  to  that  ring — was 
the  unfortunate  Maltese.  The  paleness  of  the  night's  rage 
and  watching  was  visible  through  the  brown  tints  of  his 
face  ;  his  black  eyes  were  glittering  with  fire.  The  cutter 
circled  round,  and  presently  sided  on  to  the  buoy. 

"  Why,  how  the  devil  did  you  get  here  ?"  said  Clare,  who 
had  been  on  board  all  the  evening,  and  knew  nothing  of  its 
events.  The  Maltese  made  no  answer  ;  fumbled  in  his  side 
a  minute. 

"  Take  care,  sir,"  said  the  coxswain  ;  "  he's  feeling  for  a 
knife  !" 

Clare's  hand  fell  on  his  sword  hilt — "  Is  he  ?"  said  he — 
but  he  took  it  away  again,  as  the  Maltese  raised  his  empty, 
for  we  know  how  he  had  lost  his  knife. 

"  Come,  jump  in,"  said  Clare,  who  was  a  good-natured  fel- 
low, and  pitied  the  unfortunate  man's  plight.  Not  one  word 
came  from  the  Maltese.  The  men  cast  him  loose,  he  came 
into  the  boat,  and  still  he  never  spoke.  The  boat  steered 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  105 

to  the  usual  landing-place,  and  there  Clare  landed  him ; 
keeping  dead  silence,  and  preserving  the  same,  as,  without 
bow  or  ceremony  of  any  sort,  he  sprang  upon  his  native 
rock  and  strode  away. 

"  There's  murder  in  that  chap's  eyes,  sir,  or  Pm  a  liar," 
said  the  coxswain,  from  his  perch  behind,  taking  off  his  hat, 
and  getting  a  "  chew"  out  of  it. 

"  I  dare  say/'  said  Clare,  and  the  boat  shot  along 
towards  the  "  Sovereign." 

"  Landed  the  man,"  said  Clare  to  Cuckles,  briefly,  when 
he  got  on  deck. 

"  Yery  well,"  replied  Cuckles.  On  which  Clare  returned 
to  the  cockpit  to  finish  his  sleep,  and  Cuckles  proceeded 
with  the  morning's  work,  the  monotony  of  which  he  relieved 
by  sending  a  youngster  to  the  mizen-top,  barefooted,  (to 
make  him  hardy,)  and  by  caning  a  second-class  boy. 
Easy,  gentlemanly  employments,  congenial  to  Cuckles' 
mind,  and  the  practice  of  which  had  gained  him  some 
repute  as  a  "disciplinarian."  For  there  are  grades  in 
disciplinarianism,  as  in  everything  else  ;  and  links  to  be 
traced — as,  from  a  Bacon  to  a  baboon,  so  from  a  Sir 
Charles  Napier  to  a  Cuckles,  or  a  beadle. 

It  was  observed  in  the  cockpit  of  the  "  Sovereign,"  at 
dressing  time  that  morning,  that  there  was  an  unusual  de- 
mand for  soda  water  ;  and  Bung  complained  of  the  peril  in 
which  he  was  placed  by  the  flying  corks.  Stories  were 
afloat  about  the  adventures  of  the  previous  evening — about 
serenades  astern  of  various  ships  in  harbor,  and  suppers  at 
Joe's  ;  and  several  gentlemen  were  observed  to  be  sunk  in 
languor  at  breakfast  time,  and  there  was  a  frequent  request 
for  something  devilled  at  that  meal.  On  such  mornings 
there  is  a  coolness  about  a  yellow  melon  which  cannot  be 
too  highly  praised,  and  more  than  one  fellow  was  up  to  his 
ears  in  a  huge  slice  of  that  fruit,  which  was  going  to  "  great 
5* 


106  SW'ELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

lengths,"  you  will  admit !  Presently  Cackles  descends  to 
his  morning  meal. 

"  Rasper,"  says  Cuckles,  "  my  omelette — sharp."  And 
down  he  sits. 

"  Omelette  ?"  says  Fitz-Gubin,  speaking  for  the  first  time 
that  morning  ;  "  I'd  like  an  omelette  1" 

"  I  fear,"  says  the  faithful  Rasper,  "  there  wasn't  only 
heggs  enough  for  the  one  you  ordered,  Mr.  Cuckles,  sir." 

Cuckles  had  ordered  that  omelette  over  night ;  the  thought 
of  it  had  cheered  his  morning  watch  :  he  felt  a  tremor  run 
through  him  ;  could  he — should  he  offer  it  to  Fitz-Gubin  ? 
Fitz-Gubin  maintained  a  dead  silence,  as  much  as  to  imply, 
"  Here  am  I,  wanting  an  omelette ;  let  an  omelette  be 
brought.  What  the  deuce  is  to  become  of  English  Institu- 
tions, if  I  can't  get  an  omelette  ?" 

"  Oh,"  says  Cuckles,  with  a  grin — which  looked  damnably 
uneasy  to  a  knowing  eye — "  have  mine,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  I 
don't  care  about  it !" 

"  Eh  ?  You're  very  good,  really,"  Fitz-Gubin  replies,  in 
a  cold-blooded,  matter-of-fact  manner.  "  As  you  don't 
care  about  it,  why — " 

"  You  don't  mind  garlic,  of  course,"  said  Cuckles. 

"  Oh,  d — n  it ;  I  hate  garlic,  like  poison.  Never  mind, 
thank  you,  Cuckles." 

Rasper  showed  signs  of  being  about  to  interpose  a  remark, 
but  Cuckles'  eye  checked  him.  He  brought  the  dish,  and 
Cuckles  devoured  it — though,  between  ourselves,  it  was  as 
perfectly  free  from  garlic  as  the  veins  of  Fitz-Gubin  from 
the  blood  of  the  gentleman  of  Picardy.  By  such  little 
strokes  of  ready  cunning  as  this,  Cuckles  somewhat  justified 
a  belief  which  he  entertained  of  his  diplomatic  talents.  He 
deserved  to  enjoy  the  dish,  and  apparently  he  did  so,  for  no 
word  did  he  utter  until  his  plate  was  clear.  Then,  he  open- 


FUN,   FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  107 

ed  the  subject  of  tha  Maltese  who  had  been  found  on  the 
fair-way  buoy. 

"  Fair-way  buoy,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  spreading  marmalade 
slowly.  "  Was  there  a  cad  on  the  fair- way  buoy  ?" 

"  Yes,"  Cuckles  answered,  looking  over  at  him  to  see  if 
he  was  only  pretending  ignorance,  and  ready  to  give  a  pleas- 
ant leer  should  such  prove  to  be  the  case.  But  Fitz-Gubin 
was  quite  serious. 

"  Rather  a  cool  berth  for  a  cad,"  said  Fitz-Gubin.  "  Did 
he  appear  to  enjoy  it  ?" 

•"  I  can  tell  you  about  that,"  said  Leslie  Clare,  from  the 
lockers.  "  He  looked,  when  I  cast  him  off  and  landed  him, 
as  if  he'd  like  to  cut  my  throat.  He's  a  black  fellow  with 
a  mark  over  his  eyebrow  ;  it's  my  opinion  he'll  lie  in  wait 
some  night  for  some  of  us,  and  will  cut  our  throats." 

Fitz-Gubin  looked  grave.  "  Why,  Riddel,  is  it  our 
friend  of  the  opera  ?" 

"  I'm  afraid  it  is,"  answered  Riddel.  "  Serve  him  right, 
too." 

"  But,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  "  did  you  not  feel  you  might 
compromise  met" 

Fitz-Gubin  rose  in  a  dignified  manner  after  he  had  uttered 
this  characteristic  speech,  and  left  the  gun-room.  Riddel 
had  a  head-ache,  and  lay  down  on  the  lockers  without  mak- 
ing any  remark  ;  Cuckles  assumed  a  serious  air  ;  Siddlingtou 
whispered  to  Beaulieu  that  "  he  thought  Lord  Fitz-Gubin 
took  too  serious  a  view  of  the  matter" — like  the  polite 
fellow  that  he  was  ;  old  Manton,  who  had  just  taken  down 
a  battered  old  cocked-hat  box  (in  which  he  kept  his  cigars) 
from  the  place  where  it  lodged,  immediately  began — 

"  Well,  I'm  d — d ;  I  don't  think  discipline  can  last  in  this 
squadron.  I  don't  see  how  !  When  I  entered  the  service, 
a  youngster  would  have  been  flogged  for  half  the  tricks 


108  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

v 

there  has  been  played  in  this  harbor  within  the  last  three 
weeks."  And  so  he  ran  on  for  a  few  minutes,  more,  suo,  to 
the  general  amusement,  till  he  had  run  himself  out.  I  have 
known  stagers  of  the  old  school,  who  were  both  wise  men 
and  good  examples,  and  proper  givers  of  advice  ;  but  there 
are  others  who  differ  from  the  moderns  just  as  an  old  Dutch 
clock  does  from  a  new  watch — make  more  noise  in  telling 
you  the  time  of  day,  but  keep  it  no  better  than  the  last 
dandy  invention. 

At  noon,  or  not  long  after,  down  came  a  midshipman 
from  Commander  Mutter,  with  a  bit  of  news  and  a  message. 
"  Commander  wants  the  names  of  all  the  fellows  who  were 
on  shore  last  night,  and  the  time  they  came  on  board  !" 
What  a  sensation  ! 

"  When,  the  deuce,  did  he  give  the  order  V  said  Beau- 
lieu. 

"This  minute.  The  information's  required  from  every 
ship  in  the  harbor,"  said  the  midshipman. 

"  That  means  mischief,"  remarked  Riddel.  "  I  see  Sir 
B — 'a  hand  in  that  suggestion.  Well,  put  down  Riddel, 
Esq.,  Two  A.  M." 

"  It  was  nearer  Three,  I  fear,"  said  Beaulieu. 

"  Was  it  ?  Why,  what  time  was  it  when  we  had  the 
brandy  after  floating  the  smytch  ?" 

"  Why,  not  much  after  One  !  But  you  forget  we  had  a 
game  of  billiards  after  that.  And  then,  you  know,  we 
knocked  up  Joe  Sprogaleff,  and  his  wife  put  her  head  out 
of  the  window  ;  and  we  went  to  BoyetrePs,  and  they 
wouldn't  let  us  in,  and  you  kicked  the  door  in,  and  refused 
to  leave  the  house  till  they  brought  some  supper — " 

Riddel  groaned. 

" — And  the  waiter  came  in  with  a  ham  and  some  bread 
and  butter,  and  you  would  have  a  bottle  of  champagne  and 
a  lobster,  and  Boyetrel  was  going  to  send  for  the  police, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  109 

and  you  made  him  sit  down,  and  we  wouldn't  leave  till  they 
brought  some  more  brandy.  Then  you  wanted  a  cigar,  and, 
don't  you  remember,  we  met  Wallop,  of  the  Jupiter,  and 
he  was  drunk,  and  wanted  to  fight  the  marker  at  Mula's  ; 
and  you  went  into  a  police-office  to  get  a  light,  and  insisted 
on  being  locked  up,  till  we  dragged  you  away  ; — " 

Riddel  gave  another  piteous  groan. 

"  Whereupon,  Wallop  began  a  song  about  a  cavalier,  and 
we  all  came  down  to  the  harbor,  without  serenading  Ricks, 
as  you  finally  proposed." 

"  Riddel,  Esq.,  Four  A.  M.,  I  fear  must  be  the  entry," 
said  Riddel. 

The  midshipman  wrote  it  down,  and  added  the  names  of 
Beaulieu,  Corbieton,  and  others.  "  Anybody  else  ?" 

"  Yes,"  said  Forbessy,  "  I  must  be  put  down." 

"  Why,  Forbessy,  this  is  the  first  time  I've  heard  your 
voice  this  morning." 

"  So  it  is,"  said  Forbessy  ;  "  I  am  dull,  I  suppose." 

"  Anybody  else  ?"  was  once  more  asked,  after  the  entry 
of  Forbessy's  name  and  hour.  At  that  moment  Fitz-Grubin 
entered,  and  was  informed  of  the  inquiry  in  progress.  He 
seemed  rather  annoyed  ;  and  the  mess  were  surprised  as  he 
dictated— "  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  Five  A.  M." 

Why  did  Forbessy  feel  chilled  as  he  happened  to  look  up 
at  the  speaker  ?  Who  knows  ?  Have  you  ever  felt  in  the 
presence  of  a  man  that  he  had  an  element  in  him  which  was 
repugnant  to  your  spiritual  nature  ?  He  is  a  dunce,  per- 
haps, but  his  .sneer  will  wound  you.  He  has  a  disagreeable 
relation  to  you — you  don't  know  how.  Out  of  some  such 
sentiment  came  the  notion  of  the  evil  eye,  of  the  evil  genius, 
of  the  fascination  of  witchcraft.  You  can  call  it,  if  you 
please,  a  "  natural  antipathy,"  but  you  do  not  explain  it.  A 
touch  of  this  ran  through  Forbessy  at  that  moment,  and  he 
thought,  as  he  looked  at  Fitz-Gubin.  Was  it  your  cold,  hoi- 


110  SWELL-LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

low  voice  that  startled  me  only  ?  Why  do  I  shrink  from 
it  ?  Or  what,  in  the  name  of  mystery,  is  the  destiny  that 
binds  together  you  and  me  ? 

Fitz-Gubin's  announcement,  I  say,  surprised  those  who 
remembered  that  he  had  not  joined  the  party  of  the  previous 
night.  They  were,  indeed,  beginning  to  find  out  that  he 
was  not  a  very  communicative  fellow.  Here,  indeed,  was 
a  man  who  lived  with  you,  was  familiar  with  you,  and  the 
rest  of  it,  and  who  carried  his  heart  locked  up,  and  the  key 
in  his  pocket ;  who  travelled  in  your  company  in  life,  (as  an 
iceberg  travels  in  company  with  a  ship, )  yet  would  part  with 
you  for  ever  to-morrow  with  a  nod  and  a  good  bye  !  You 
wondered  what  the  deuce  his  notions  about  existence  were, 
or  his  object  in  life  at  all.  But,  to  be  sure,  what  business 
on  earth  many  men  have  might  puzzle  us  ;  they  dress,  and 
dine,  and  die,  and  never  seem  to  think  it  odd  that  they 
should  exist  for  these  purposes. 

The  midshipman  wrote  down  the  entry,  which  showed 
Fitz-Gubin  to  have  been  the  latest  of  all  arrivals  on  the 
previous  night ;  Riddel  turned  round  on  the  lockers,  and 
composed  himself  to  sleep ;  Forbessy  leaned  back  in  his 
chair,  and  mused. 

Fitz-Gubin  turned  languidly  over  the  pages  of  a  novel — 
seeming  to  think  it  strange  that  nobody  did  anything  to 
amuse  him.  Then  he  strolled  out,  and  proceeded  to  the 
cock-pit  to  dress  himself  ;  for  he  ceremoniously  went  through 
the  various  toilettes  of  the  day,  and  soon  a  yellow  glare  in 
the  fore-part  of  that  place  showed  that  he  was  busy. 
Commander  Mutter  observed  that  Fitz-Gubin  did  not  ask 
leave  to  go  on  shore,  till  he  had  dressed  himself  for  that 
purpose  ;  whereas  it  would  have  been  a  little  more  modest 
to  have  postponed  his  adornment,  and  not  to  have  looked 
quite  so  confident  of  obtaining  permission.  This  might 
have  irritated  a  less  Christian  mind  than  that  of  Mutter, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  Ill 

but  be  remembered  "  what  St.  Paul  had  said,"  (to  use  a 
favorite  expression  of  his,)  and  did  not  altogether  forget 
the — last  edition  of  the  Peerage. 

When  Fitz-Gubin  reached  the  Mitre  Hotel,  where,  as  we 
know,  he  had  his  head-quarters  on  shore,  (and  where  notes 
were  left  for  him  from  Roribel,  from  his  tradesmen,  from 
fellows  in  the  regiments,  &c.,)  he  had  a  neat  little  parcel 
handed  to  him  by  the  polite  and  dignified  landlord. 

The  landlord  was  one  who  boasted  that  he  had  an  eye 
for  a  gentleman,  or  indeed  "  know'd  a  gentleman  when  he 
see'd  him,"  if  you  prefer  his  own  expression.  A  gentleman 
in  fact  (whose  steward  he  had  been)  had  placed  Sproggs  in 
the  Mitre — endowing  him  with  a  wife,  by  way  of  further 
kindness,  and  (you  don't  know  how  people  talk  in  places 
like  Malta)  with  a  child  to  begin  with  !  Mrs.  Sproggs 
was  a  buxom,  dressy,  lively  mortal,  who  never  allowed  her 
husband  to  show  himself  too  much,  justly  believing  that  she 
was  far  more  likely  to  be  agreeable  to  strangers  than  he 
was.  But  to-day  she  was  out,  and  it  was  Sproggs  himself 
who  gave  to  Fitz-Gubin  the  parcel,  which  (we  know  before 
he  opens  it)  contained  the  bracelet  from  Mr,  Greenstone. 
Sproggs  had  pried  into  it,  and  afterwards  told  a  friend  he 
knew  "  what  Lord  Alfred  was  after,"  and  remarked  what  a 
sly  gentleman  he  was. 

As  he  opened  it,  the  light  broke  from  the  magic  stones ; 
he  had  none  but  a  sensual  feeling  for  the  beautiful,  but  that 
he  had  keenly,  and  he  was  pleased  with  the  glitter.  How 
the  bracelet  would  become  Marie's  arm  I  If  he  could  only 
get  an  opportunity  of  putting  it  on  ?  Or — should  he  send 
it,  and  whom  could  he  employ  ?  Who  was  this  knave  of 
the  opera  ?  Would  it  not  be  as  well  to  buy  him  out  of 
hand,  and  not  have  a  ridiculous  controversy  with  him  ?  If 
that  man  could  have  been — I  don't  say  murdered  before 
Fitz-Gubin's  eyes  in  any  cruel  manner — but  sunk  into  fifty 


112  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

fathoms  water  with  68  pounders,  quietly  and  effectually — 
he,  Fitz-G.,  not  seeing  it,  and  no  questions  asked,  he  would 
have  decidedly  liked  it — authorized  it.  Men's  hearts  are 
as  bad  as  ever  they  were,  as  anybody  ought  to  know  from 
his  own ;  we  are  more  effeminate  than  our  ancestors,  and 
bloodshed  shocks  our  nerves  more  !  but  that  is  all.  What 
matters  it  that  your  skin  is  a  little  thinner  ?  Just  reflect  a 
moment,  good  reader ; — Claudius  does  not  carry  off  his 
tradesman's  daughter  by  force  now — but  bless  you,  he  tells 
her  lies,  and  gives  her  jewelry,  and  a  brougham,  and  a 
box  at  the  theatre,  and  gets  old  Yirginius  a  place  in  the 
Rag-bag  office  !  Is  he  any  better  than  the  ancient  patri- 
cian ?  In  the  same  way,  we  do  not  fight  with  each  other, 
and  pay  fines  for  maiming — why? — because  we  want  to  stay 
at  home,  and  make  money ! 

Fitz-G.  was  still  gazing  musingly  on  the  bracelet,  when 
he  heard  a  step  on  the  stairs,  and  just  as  he  whipped  the 
ornament  into  its  case,  and  the  case  into  his  pocket,  Rori- 
bel  entered.  The  face,  the  whiskers,  the  air  of  that  elegant 
creature,  were  as  light  and  as  cheerful  as  ever. 

"  Fitz-Gubin,  have  you  forgotten  where  we  dine  to- 
day ?» 

"  Dine  !  are  we  engaged  V 

11  Then  you  have  forgotten.  This  is  Mr.  Bulder's  dinner- 
party, and  go  you  must."  Fitz-Gubin  acquiesced  ;  he  had 
a  very  vague  recollection  of  Bulder's  invitation,  and  no  par- 
ticularly vivid  one  of  his  person ;  nevertheless,  he  looked 
on  dinners  as  scenes  that  must  be  gone  through,  some  dull, 
some  lively,  some  good,  some  bad  ;  and  on  Bulder's  dinner 
to-day,  as  a  routine  dinner  to  be  eaten.  And  he  instantly 
rang  his  bell,  and  when  he  emerged  from  his  bed-room,  he 
looked,  I  am  bound  to  say,  a  worthy  companion  for  Roribel. 
They  were  a  pair  of  deities  in  the  eyes  of  certain  circles  in 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  113 

Malta  ;  the  Castor  and  Pollux  of  the  Service,  twin  children 
of  the  Latona  of  aristocracy  ! 

Shall  I  give  you,  good  reader,  a  letter  of  introduction  to 
my  friend,  Mr.  Bulder,  of  Strada  Polentoni  ?  I  shall  be 
very  happy. 

"  MY  DEAR  SIR — You  will  oblige  me  by  showing  any  at- 
tention in  your  power  to  young  Mr.  Brown  of  the  '  Auri- 
cula/ He  is  the  son  of  the  late  Captain  Brown,  who  dis- 
tinguished himself  so  much  in  the  last  war,  (his  invention, 
you  will  remember,  was  twenty  years  under  the  considera- 
tion of  the  Admiralty,)  and  I  am  interested  in  his  success, 
for  he  is  a  youth  of  parts,  and  I  fear  my  poor  friend  Brown 
did  not  leave  his  family  too  well  provided  for. 

"  I  am,  my  dear  Sir,  &c.  &c." 

Perhaps  this  is  not  the  kind  of  introduction  which  would 
do  much  for  you  ?  Indeed,  I  fear  my  friend  Bulder  would 
ask  you  to  meet  young  Galipotti,  the  docter's  son ;  give 
you  a  dinner  ingeniously  compounded  of  the  reliquiae  of  his 
last  dinner-party,  and  go  to  sleep  after  it,  leaving  you  to 
employ  yourself  on  some  watery  claret.  Let  us  try  another. 

"  MY  DEAR  SIR — This  will  be  presented  to  you  by  a  young 
friend  of  mine,  Mawker  Pemmison,  just  appointed  to  the 
'Yestal.'  You  are  familiar  with  the  name  of  his  father, 
Mawker  Pemmison,  M.  P.,  the  well-known  member  for  the 
wealthy  town  of  Strikeham,  of  whom  every  man  of  business 
has  heard.  I  dined  with  him  yesterday,  and  Lady  Alicia 
expressed  her  hope  that  Mawker  would  meet  with  friends 
in  the  country  to  which  he  is  going. 

"  My  dear  Sir,  yours,  &c.,  &c." 

Suffice  it  to  say,  that  this  was  a  "  Pemmison"  day,  and, 
as  a  man  of  the  world,  (which,  of  course,  it  is  your  ambi- 


114  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

tion,  as  a  young  man,  to  be,)  you  will  agree  it  was  the 
best  day  Fitz-Gubin  could  have  had  for  dining  with  Bulder. 

They  have?  I  believe,  in  Malta,  a  hundred  copies  of 
Debrett.  (Mr.  Muir  of  Strada  Reale  may  correct  me  if  I 
am  wrong.)  The  B aiders  had  looked  out  Fitz-Gubin,  of 
course,  in  their  copy,  and  gloated  over  the  account  of  the 
grandeur  of  houses  in  Picardy.  Bulder  respected  aristoc- 
racy as  most  people  do,  that  is,  he  did  not  so  much  respect 
the  thing  itself,  as  respect  the  respect  for  the  thing  !  Do 
you  understand  ?  And  the  Bulders  enjoyed,  by  being  abroad, 
the  advantage  of  entertaining  far  greater  people  than  they 
could  have  hoped  to  entertain  in  England.  When  Lord 
Troubadour's  yacht  arrives  at  Bombakea,  Lord  Trouba- 
dour must  dine  with  the  consul,  or  mope  on  board,  and 
know  nothing  about  the  place.  When  the  Countess  of 
Ostrich's  yacht  is  in  want  of  repairs,  and  is  laid  up  in  Malta 
for  the  purpose,  she  must  have  a  corvette  to  go  to  Naples 
in,  and  she  and  her  party  must  dine  with  Prodger.  These 
are  great  considerations,  and  worthy  of  all  acceptance  by 
the  middle  classes,  who  think  of  settling  abroad.  They 
should  make  up  their  minds  to  enjoy  the  advantage  while 
the  opportunities  last ;  a  day  comes  when  the  Wyomings 
retire  to  Harley-street  or  Tyburnia,  and  are  potentates  no 
more  ;  a  day  comes  when  the  ship  is  paid  off — when  a 
Cuckles  departs  to  lodgings  near  Charing-cross,  and  a  Fitz- 
Gubin  to  Grosvenor  square. 

Young  Bulder  cultivated  a  moustache  and  affected  mili- 
tary society,  but  was  damped  early  that  day  by  Fitz-Gubin's 
asking  him  what  regiment  he  belonged  to.  The  cool,  stolid 
manner  of  Fitz-Gubin  gave  no  possible  hint  that  he  intended 
a  sarcasm  ;  and  of  course  young  Bulder  looked  all  the  more 
annoyed  for  the  moment.  His  father  enjoyed  Fitz-G.'s 
mistake,  having  observed  with  regret  the  increasing  aliena- 
tion from  business  of  his  son's  tastes.  For  the  youth  made 


FUN,  FKIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  115 

r  evening,  when  he  could,  to  the  cafes  and  the  bil- 
ns,  where  Ludder  of  the  Marines,  Hunibleston  of 
the  — th,  and  other  gentlemen,  occupied  themselves  with 
cigars  and  pool,  and  (old  Bulder's  dinners  being  famous) 
were  civil  to  him.  There  seemed,  indeed,  every  hope  that 
this  youthful  Bulder,  so  far  from  turning  out  an  awkward, 
reserved,  prosperous  man  of  business,  would  become  an 
elegant  and  agreeable  young  fellow,  fit  for — nothing  at  all, 
and  throw  a  lustre  on  the  family. 

Bulder,  had  he  told  the  truth,  would  probably  have  con- 
fessed that  he  found  Fitz-Gubin  slow.  But  he  could  not 
have  complained  of  his  manners,  for  Fitz-Gubin  (though 
his  fancy  was  ever  wandering  to  another  part  of  Yaletta) 
was  ever  attentive,  self-possessed,  and  satisfied  with  every- 
thing. When  the  business  of  the  island  was  talked  of,  he 
was  mild  and  reasonable,  and  knowing  next  to  nothing 
about  it,  said  that  next  to  nothing  cheerfully.  Did  they 
talk  of  the  churches,  antiquities,  people,  he  was  the  same 
composed  individual.  No  advantage  more  prominently  dis- 
tinguishes our  modern  man  of  quality  than  this.  He  is, 
perhaps,  at  a  public  dinner :  the  occasion  important ;  the 
crowd  immense  ;  he  has  to  speak  and  expound  his  views  ; 
he  has  no  views,  and  nothing  of  the  least  consequence  to 
say.  Does  he  blush  and  stutter  like  a  roturier  1  Not  he  ! 
He  rises,  and  with  the  best  air  in  the  world,  says  his 
nothing,  and  charms  the  assembly. 

The  saloons  of  Mr.  Bulder  (for,  at  a  certain  stage  of 
a  man's  prosperity,  his  rooms  become  saloons,  by  their  own 
right)  were  thrown  open  that  evening  to  a  numerous  as- 
sembly. Our  friends,  the  Misses  Wyoming,  were  there ; 
Captain  and  Mrs.  and  Miss  Plimmer ;  Sir  John  Sumper 
and  " party,"  and  Sir  John  Lumper  and  his  party;  the 
Kingfishers,  the  Crawsters,  the  Popanells,  and  many  others. 
And  the  sea-breeze  is  so  famous  for  its  healthiness,  that  you 


116  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

may  observe  it  quite  revives  and  brightens  up  even  a 
reputation  sometimes  ;  so  that  at  the  houses  of  the  Bulders 
and  others,  notabilities  from  England,  of  a  certain  rank, 
glide  about  quite  blooming,  and  free  from  all  traces  of 
naughtiness  !  Fitz-Gubin  and  Roribel  knew  these  cases  of 
moral  convalescence  perfectly  well,  and  whispered  together, 
as  two  figures  passed  in  the  distance,  about  whom  stories 
could  be  told.  It  was  fine  to  see  these  two  potentates,  on 
occasions  like  the  present,  when  they  were  the  "  swells"  of 
the  navy  present,  or  at  all  events  of  the  junior  navy ;  for 
we  must  not  forget  professional  rank,  which,  of  course, 
takes  the  pas,  and  has  been  remarked  at  times  to  supply 
the  place  of  manners,  wit,  birth,  and  all  that  classifies 
mankind  ! 

"  Fitz-Gubin,  let  us  come  and  speak  to  the  Wyoinings, 
and  you  ask  Miss  Wyoming  to  dance,"  said  Roribel.  It 
was  RoribeFs  duty  to  see  proper  attention  paid  to  these 
ladies,  as  became  a  flag-lieutenant ;  and  an  attentive,  grace- 
ful officer  he  was,  performing  all  offices  of  chivalry,  duly — » 
not  entangling  his  heart,  however,  as  he  told  Fitz-Gubin, 
with  a  sigh.  "  Charming  girls,"  said  that  mirror  of  courte- 
sy, with  his  very  best  sadness.  "  Beautiful  creatures  !  but 
I  am  but  a  younger  son,  FitzrGubin."  Fitz-G.  smiled  lan- 
guidly, and  thought  it  very  good-natured  of  his  friend  to 
sigh  on  the  subject,  and  perhaps  a  little  affected  of  him  to 

sigh  to  him And  so  they  approached  the  ladies  in 

question.  Some  of  the  prettiest  girls  in  Malta  looked  with 
admiration  at  the  two  gentlemen,  and  envied  the  Wyomings. 

"  Do  you  see  those  two  infernal  idiots?"  said  Mr.  Jigger, 
of  the  brig  "  Bustard,"  to  Mr.  Wheeler,  of  the  brig 
"  Racer." 

"I  do.  That's  the  flag-lieutenant,  the  oldest  one,"  re- 
sponded Mr.  Wheeler,  "the  other  fellow's  a  Lord  Fitz- 
Gubin,  or  some  such  name." 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  117 

"  They'll  promote  him  to  lieutenant  instanter,  and  send 
him  to  the  Royal  Yacht,  you'll  see,"  said  Jigger  bitterly. 

"  Oh,  of  course.  This  is  confoundedly  slow,"  said  Mr. 
Wheeler,  looking  round  savagely.  "  Hillo  !  here's  Mott- 
ford  of  us.  Who  asked  you  here,  Mottford  ?" 

"  Who  do  you  suppose  ?  Bulder,  of  course.  My  father 
banks  with  his  brother ;  and  they  always  ask  me  to  two 
balls  and  a  dinner  every  year." 

"  Is  there  any  brandy  in  th6  refreshment  room  ?"  inquired 
Mr.  Jigger,  with  a  business-like  air. 

"  I  fear  not,"  Wheeler  answered.  "  Gad,  I'd  rather  have 
a  quiet  tumbler  at  Mula's,  than  go  to  any  evening  party  in 
Christendom." 

"Why  did  you  come,  then?"  said  a  mild  young  gentle- 
man of  their  acquaintance,  who  affected  "society." 

"  Because  Kiddleton  wouldn't  have  given  me  leave  to 
come  on  shore,  except  to  come  here  ;  and  if  I  hadn't  come, 
there's  Weavel,  our  purser,  in  the  rooms,  and  he  would 
have  told  Kiddleton.  Now  do  you  see  ?"  The  mild  young 
gentleman  was  silenced. 

"  You  have  heard  of  the  general  order,  of  course,"  Jigger 
said.  "  It  was  sent  out  this  afternoon,  and  gives  one  hun- 
dred and  fifty-five  reasons  why  putting  a  Maltese  on  the 
fair-way  buoy  is  at  variance  with  sound  discipline." 

"  I  wish  they  had  kept  the  fellow  on  the  buoy  till  eight 
o'clock,  and  then  we  would  all  have  seen  him,"  Wheeler 
remarked.  "  Is  there  going  to  be  an  inquiry  ?" 

"  Goodness  knows.  Probably,  as  everybody  seems  to 
have  heard  that  some  flag-ship  fellows  did  it,  we  of  the 
small  craft  will  have  our  leave  stopped,"  said  the  sardonic 
Jigger. 

In  the  meantime  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  had  been  dancing  with 
Miss  Wyoming. 

"  Did  you  like  the  new  buffo  last  night  ?"  she  asked. 


118  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"Yes,"  answered  Fitz-Gubin ;  "  but  you  were  not  there, 
Miss  Wyoming." 

"  I  was." 

"  Strange  that  I  should  not  have  seen  your  party  then," 
he  observed.  "  I  looked  to  see  if  there  were  any  faces  I 
knew  in  the  house  too,"  said  the  quiet  youth.  Miss  Wyo- 
ming was  silent. 

When  the  dance  was  over,  the  vMiss  Wyomings,  Roribel, 
and  Fitz-Gubin  fell  into  a  group.  Roribel  began  to  talk 
of  a  pic-nic  to  Bosketto,  which  had  for  some  tune  been 
meditated  in  the  polite  circles  of  the  island.  Who  does  not 
remember  the  sloping  valley  of  strawberry  gardens,  the  de- 
serted old  house  with  yet  a  certain  air  of  old  feudal  gen- 
tility about  it — the  stalactic  cavern,  with  the  fresh  fountain 
bubbling  up  among  its  carved  and  moist  stones  ?  That 
pic-nic  was  determined  on. 

As  Roribel  and  Fitz-Gubin  were  walking  together  after 
the  party,  the  subject  of  the  Maltese  and  the  adventure  of 
the  previous  night  came  up  in  their  conversation.  Fitz- 
Gubin  was  regretting  that  he  should  have  been  out  so  late, 
and  should  have  figured  in  the  list  so  very  conspicuously. 
"  You  in  the  list  I"  says  Roribel — "  you  were  not  in  the 
list  1"  Fitz-Gubin  was  astonished,  and  no  little  pleased ; 
but  puzzled  to  account  for  the  lucky  circumstance.  "  I 
shan't  complain,  however,"  he  said,  with  a  pleased  chuckle. 
They  speculated  on  the  subject,  and  reflecting  whose  hands 
the  paper  had  passed  through,  concluded  that  the  attentive 
Cuckles  had  taken  care  of  the  omission,  as,  indeed,  Cuckles 
had  ;  and  the  chapter  may  end  as  it  opened — with  a  men- 
tion of  his  honored  name. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  119 


CHAPTER    VI. 

ONE  fine  day  of  that  autumn,  some  excitement  prevailed 
in  the  squadron  ;  it  was  the  day  of  the  pic-nic.  They  say 
that  the  "  Sovereign's n  launch  was  once  sent  on  a  cruise 
with  wine  and  other  luxuries  on  board  to  regale  a  party  at 
St.  Paul's  Bay,  who  had  made  a  pilgrimage  to  the  place 
where  the  apostle  landed,  to  drink  Moselle,  and  eat  chicken 
pie.  It  may  be  so.  It  may  be  that  the  ships,  and  ships' 
boats,  and  flags,  and  men,  are,  every  now  and  then,  em- 
ployed in  the  service  of  all  kinds  of  agreeable  men  and 
women,  and  that  we  are  a  luxurious,  money-spending,  tiebt- 
contracting  generation.  "  Here's  a  pretty  fellow,"  exclaims 
Tomkins,  indignantly,  "  to  be  sneering  at  his  old  profession  ! 
Pray,  sir,  have  you  never  shown  your  approval  of  pic-nics, 
or  the  '  Sovereign's'  Madeira?"  "  Tomkins,  I  like  Madeira, 
and  I  have  been  a  jolly  fellow  in  my  time,  but  I  don't  know 
that  that  much  affects  the  question  at  issue."  Let  us  pro- 
ceed with  our  sketches  of  swell  life  at  sea,  and  make  the 
most  of  this  fine  day. 

Squirrell,  the  livery-stable  keeper  of  Strada  Borni,  found 
his  stock  of  animals  in  much  request  this  morning.  It  will 
be  admitted  that  naval  men  ride  much  better  than  Commo- 
dore Trunnion,  in  our  day  ;  that  in  Malta  we  can  produce 
a  man  or  two  with  credit  at  the  races,  though  much  re- 
mains to  be  done  yet,  as  anybody  who  has  seen  Jigger  gal- 
loping past  the  royal  carriage  at  Naples,  with  his  trousers 
split  across  the  knee,  knows.  But  the  constant  employ- 
ment of  the  horses  of  Squirrell,  about  this  time,  was  im- 
proving the  practice  of  youngsters.  Squirrell's  horses,  in 
fact,  exhibit  every  variety  of  peculiar  disposition.  "Jo- 
seph "  invariably  backs  against  a  stone  wall ;  the  "  Go- 
yernor  "  is  famous  for  his  efforts  to  seize  the  horseman  next 


120  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

him  by  the  leg,  and  so  on..  By  selecting  them  by  turns, 
one  learns  to  combat  different  tricks.  By  long  habit,  all 
these  noble  animals  make  a  dead  stop  at  the  "  Dairy,"  that  • 
well-known  way-side  hostelry,  where  generation  after  gene- 
ration of  fellows  have  paused,  and  have  consumed  rum  and 
milk.  The  policemen  about  the  gates  were  quite  excited 
this  morning,  as  the  conveyances  of  the  party  rolled  by, 
and  after  them,  at  a  canter,  with  gold-laced  caps  glittering, 
the  naval  men  came,  Fitz-Gubin  and  Roribel  were  the 
best  mounted  men  there.  They  were  both  in  plain  clothes, 
and  both  indignant  at  Jigger,  (who  belonged  to  the  party, 
nobody  quite  knew  how,)  who  kept  shooting  ahead  at  a 
gallop,  and  whose  trousers,  escaping  from  the  thraldom  of 
straps,  were  constantly  approaching  his  knees.  Cuckles 
was  not  present,  invariably  avoiding  festivities  accompanied 
by  expense,  if  possible.  Commander  Mutter  was  one  of 
the  party,  being  a  paternal  kind  of  man,  and,  from  general 
harmlessness,  serving  well  as  a  he-duenna.  The  Commander 
had  had  all  his  pluck  taken  out  of  him  in  the  course  of  a 
long  and  severe  matrimonial  training.  He  was  just  the  fel- 
low to  be  paternal  among  young  girls  and  young  fellows  on 
these  occasions ;  exercising  a  kind  of  restraint,  yet  not  in 
the  way  ;  overflowing  with  small  talk  and  heavy  goodness  ; 
moderate  in  wine  himself,  but  never  forgetting  the  cork- 
screw. A  most  useful  man  !  Mounted  on  a  mule,  Mutter 
trotted  alongside,  first  one  carriage  of  the  cavalcade,  and 
then  another  ;  paying  attention  to  the  wives  and  daughters 
of  the  influential  people.  How  is  it  (as  I  so  often  remark) 
that  the  serious  and  saintly  party  are  such  worshippers  of 
the  authorities  ?  Yet,  on  these  holiday  occasions,  Mutter 
would  be  easy  and  lively  with  a  youngster  now  and  then, 
having  a  certain  fund  of  good-nature  in  him,  which  the 
consciousness  of  rank  did  not  altogether  keep  down.  In- 
deed, how  many  a  worthy  man  is  there  in  this  world,  who 


FCN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  121 

is  spoiled  by  the  big-wig  or  cocked-hat  power,  and  who,  di- 
vested of  these  symbols,  would  be  universally  respected  and 
popular  ! 

The  landscape  which  lies  before  you  as  you  ride  out  from 
Yaletta  to  the  country — if  country  it  can  be  called — is  not 
cheerful  to  the  eye.  A  white  or  brown  stony  surface,  inter- 
sected by  white  or  brown  walls,  bounding  scraggy  and 
dreary  fields,  cannot  be  very  much  enlivened  even  by  the 
brightest  sunshine.  Your  gaze  wanders  to  the  low-lying 
horizon  and  loves  the  thought  of  the  sea.  Yet  there  are 
spots  of  interest  and  attraction,  both  to  mind  and  eye, 
as  you  let  your  fancy  and  your  bridle  go  pretty  loosely,  and 
leave  the  harbor  and  the  fortifications  behind.  There  are 
hints  and  gleams  of  the  beautiful  in  the  stony  waste,  as  in 
ordinary  life.  St.  Antonio,  with  its  palace  and  gardens,  is 
a  little  islet  of  joy,  where  the  heart  warms  to  the  glitter  of 
the  sweet  and  cool  orange  trees.  A  little  village,  quaint 
but  lively,  is  before  you  at  one  turn,  with  a  fantastic  chapel, 
and  gaudy  and  picturesque  images  basking  in  corners  in  the 
sun  ;  where  the  gay-colored  attire  of  the  brown-skinned  and 
black-eyed  people,  is  characteristic  of  their  Eastern  descent. 

Or,  you  slacken  at  a  rather  long  though  not  steep  hill, 
and  the  boom  of  the  cathedral  bell  through  the  quiet  air 
meets  you  on  the  way.  Yes ;  the  genius  of  romance  is 
alive  still  in  that  island.  And,  are  you  a  sentimentalist,  as 
well  as  a  humorist  ?  then  pass  Mr.  Bulder's  dinner  parties — 
leave  Roribel  in  the  burning  street  ....  turn  into  the  old 
building  dedicated  to  St.  John — cool,  venerable,  and  with 
the  thick  incense-smell  lingering  about  it,  and  loiter  a  little 
over  the  flag-stones  bearing  the  coat-armor  of  the  Knights  ! 
The  "  enlightened "  individual  (I  allude  to-  -  Bagman, 
Esq.,  the  distinguished  traveller,  who  judges  of  every  place 
by  its  ability  to  produce  cotton)  will  tell  you  stories  about 
their  misdeeds  ;  when  their  day  as  an  Order  was  over,  and 

6 


122  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

their  great  purpose  had  spent  itself :  but  they 

pious,  brave,  high-hearted  gentlemen  in  their  time  ;  and  let 
us  beg  the  distinguished  Bagman  to  allow  their  ashes  to 
rest  ! 

When  our  party  drew  near  Citta  Yecchia,  the  population 
were  all  astir.  Frank  came  out,  cap  in  hand,  from  his  hos- 
telry, to  offer  his  services  ;  the  beggars  (of  whom  Malta  is 
productive,  and  who  rush  into  unbounded  luxury  if  they 
secure  two-pence)  swarmed  around  ;  a  knot  of  poor  little 
sucking  priests,  in  black  knee-breeches,  and  stockings,  pale- 
faced  and  meagre  lads,  stared  from  a  respectful  distance 
tranquilly,  and  perhaps  (poor  fellows)  envied  the  rosy  and 
fiery  Jigger  who  galloped  Squirrel's  horse  "  Shampoo"  up 
and  down  the  place  at  full  speed.  It  was  a  fine  sunshiny 
noon.  The  party  came  to  a  temporary  halt  ;  some  of  them 
went  to  see  the  curiosities  of  the  place — the  church  or  the 
catecombs  ;  others  lounged  about  where  some  trees  afforded 
a  shade. 

"  Well,"  said  Koribel,  to  a  section  of  the  party,  who  by 
natural  gravity  had  approached  each  other,  "  what  shall  we 
do  ?  There's  the  catecombs,  to  be  sure,  but — " 

Miss  Wyoming  said,  "  they  were  places  of  great  interest, 
lut— " 

Captain  Plimmer  said,  "  Oh,  highly,  highly,  you  know. 
But— " 

In  fact,  nobody  liked  to  say  what  everybody  felt,  that 
the  catecombs  would  be  a  bore.  Koribel  thought  it  due  to 
his  reputation  to  come  brilliantly  out  of  the  difficulty. 

"  Well,  we've  all  seen  catecombs,  somewhere  ;  and  really, 
because  previous  generations  chose  to  bury  themselves  m 
such  a  style,  I  do  not  see  that  we  should  bury  ourselves 
too  !  I  confess,"  continued  Koribel,  with  rather  a  wicked 
smile  levelled  at  Commander  Mutter,  "  I  confess  that  I  am. 
a  cheerful  Christian" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          123 

So  that  notion  was  lightly  disposed  of ;  and  for  the  present 
they  moved  into  a  garden,  where  seats  were  placed  under 
an  awning  for  them.  Meanwhile,  the  attendants  were 
defiling  along  towards  the  Bosketto,  with  the  preparations 
for  lunch  ;  and  in  their  rear  trotted  on  his  pony,  jolly  little 
Lieutenant  Bulbous,  bent  on  seeing  that  the  wine  was  pro- 
perly put  in  a  cool  place,  and  everything  in  train.  His 
sunny  red  face  shone  as  he  jogged  along.  He  had  not  come 
to  see  anything,  or  to  enjoy  anybody's  company,  but  simply 
to  lunch  with  an  appetite,  which  indeed,  is,  after  all,  the 
vital  part  of  a  pic-nic.  Roribel  directed  attention  to  the 
retreating  figure  of  Bulbous,  and  hoped  that  young  Jig- 
ger would  not  get  loose  among  the  bottles  too  early  in  the 
day  ;  and  was  otherwise  very  lively. 

An  hour's  pause,  and  they  proceeded  on  their  journey  to 
Bosketto.  The  old  country  house  above  mentioned,  with 
its  yellow  old  walls,  looked  empty  and  forlorn  as  usual. 
Some  faint  and  seedy  vestige  of  what  was  once  ga.y  paint- 
ing adorns  rooms  which  were  once  rooms  of  banquet ;  a  few 
words  of  Latin  straggling  across  the  door  by  which  you 
enter,  invite  you  to  festivity.  Do  the  ghosts  accept  that 
old-fashioned  invitation  in  the  lonely  moonlight  nights  there, 
and  make  merry  with  each  other  ?  One  could  fancy  so. 
Altogether,  it  is  a  dreary,  empty,  seedy,  picturesque  old 
den.  It  stands  there  as  poverty-stricken  in  its  pride  as  a 
poor  old  Jacobite  Scotch  peer  of  the  last  age.  Curiosity 
made  Roribel  and  some  others  look  in,  and  they  gazed 
silently  about  the  rooms.  Adeline  Wyoming,  whose  pen- 
sive love  of  aristocratic  memories  we  have  remarked,  be- 
wailed the  desolation,  and  thought  Fitz-Gubin  must  feel 
quite  a  brotherly  interest  in  the  place. 

"  How  interesting  1"  said  Adeline. 

"  Yes  1"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  in  his  happy  indifference  ;  "  but 
very  small.  In  — shire  we  have  ruins  enough,  There  are, 


124  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

really  I  forget  how  many,  old  castles  within  some  miles  of 
us.  We  do  what  we  can  to  preserve  them — prevent  people 
carrying  off  the  stones,  and  all  that." 

"  What  wickedness,"  said  Adeline,  "  of  them  to  think  of 
such  a  thing  !  But  I  think  the  English  respect  old  ruins, 
and  old— old — families." 

"They  ought,"  Fitz-Gubin  said;  "if  they  don't,  why, 
what  guarantee  have  we  for  preserving — for  anything,  in 
fact  ?" 

"Very  true,"  said  Roribel,  wishing  to  persuade  Fitz- 
Gubin  he  had  made  an  intelligent  observation  ;  but  flat- 
tery was  not  very  potent  with  that  swell !  And  why  ? 
Because  he  thought  so  well  of  himself  that  your  opinion 
could  add  nothing  to  it ! 

"Is  there  anything  more  to  see ?"  inquired  Miss  Wyo- 
ming 

"Why,  there's  the  wall  outside,  but  that's  modern;  in 
fact,  a  few  years'  old,"  said  Roribel,  pointing  to  a  stone 
wall  in  the  neighborhood.  This  flash  of  pleasantry  made 
everybody  titter ;  and  they  left  the  melancholy  old  house 
and  proceeded  to  the  garden. 

"  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  is  very  silent  to-day,"  whispered  Miss 
Wyoming  to  Roribel. 

"  I  don't  know  that  he  is  ever  very  lively,"  replied  Rori- 
bel drily.  But  looking  at  him  again,  he  observed  that  he 
was  abstracted  more  than  usual.  His  arm  hung  loose,  so 
-that  Adeline  could  scarcely  hold  it  properly. 

"  Can  it  be,"  said  Roribel  to  Miss  Wyoming,  "  that  he 
is  in  love  ?" 

Miss  Wyoming  looked  very  grave.  Roribel  was  puzzled. 
"  She  cannot,"  thought  he,  "  possibly  imagine  that  that  is  a 
marrying  man."  Miss  Wyoming  was  not  such  a  fool,  but, 
indeed,  knew  both  Fitz-Gubin  and  Roribel  better  than  they 
supposed.  Roribel  was  much  the  more  lively  and  genial  of 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  125 

the  two  men,  bnt  in  heart,  probably,  they  were  on  a  par — 
just  as  a  pound  of  feathers  is  as  heavy  as  a  pound  of  lead. 
Mrs.  Plimmer,  who  was  presiding  in  the  capacity  of  mater- 
nal guardian  on  this  occasion,  knew  the  truth,  likewise — an 
experienced  dame,  who  had  that  acquaintance  with  match- 
making which  is  nowhere  attained  in  such  perfection  as  in 
garrison  society. 

The  day  of  strawberries  was  over ;  but  the  pool  of  fresh- 
est water  in  the  stalactic  cavern  was  as  cool  as  ever,  gleam- 
ing calm  and  cool  in  the  centre  of  the  fretted  stone-work — 
fluted,  graven  into  fantastic  forms  with  fairy  icicles  of  rock, 
adorned  and  pointed — speaking  of  immeasurable  time  and 
eternal  moisture.  Here  the  summer  sun  never  saw  his  face 
reflected ;  here,  like  Diana's  nymphs  bathing,  the  pleasant 
claret  bottles  kept  their  fine  natures  most  beautifully  cool. 
There  was  not  a  drop  of  romantic  blood  in  the  old  carcase 
of  Lieutenant  Bulbous,  yet  had  he  here  achieved  a  spectacle 
of  poetry ! 

The  lunch  proceeded  in  due  time.  Pop  goes  a  champagne 
bottle  ;  maddened  by  the  confinement  in  such  weather,  the 
eager  wine  leaped  out  to  meet  the  summer  and  the  air,  foam- 
ed triumphantly  into  a  glass,  and  died  happily,  meeting  the 
lips  of  pretty  Rosa  Plimmer !  Not  a  cloud  was  in  the 
Mediterranean  heaven.  The  almond  tree  revelled  in  the 
heat. 

"  I  miss  one  face,"  said  Roribel, with  tenderness.  "I miss 
Captain  Pappleton  ! — Let  us  drink  his  health." 

" Poor  Captain  Pappleton !"  said  Adeline ;  "he  would 
have  been  happy  here  I" 

"  He  mixed  salad  better  than  any  man  in  Europe  P  said 
Roribel,  with  a  gush  of  fondness.  "  Ladies  and  Gentlemen  ! 
Captain  Pappleton  has  recently  had  a — slight  accident 
Let  us  wish  him  an  honorable  acquittal  !" 

Roribel  drank.     The  company  joined. 


126  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  After  all,"  said  Roribel,  overflowing  with  brotherly 
kindness,  "  after  all,  Miss  Wyoming,  it  is  my  opinion,  as  a 
professional  man,  that  the  unhappy  loss  of  the  '  Bloater' 
will  all  prove  to  be  the  fault  of — I  don't  wish  to  impeach 
anybody — Bluffett,  the  master  !'' 

In  this  cheerful  manner  the  lunch  opened.  Jigger  drank 
any  health,  anybody  proposed  ;  "  health,  sir  :  the  devil's 
health  in  this  wine  !"  said  Jigger.  "  Silence,  youngster," 
said  Bulbous,  who  overheard  him.  Fitz-Gubin  was  at  that 
moment  observed  to  look  round  in  a  bland  and  brotherly 
manner  ;  and  presently  he  said,  "  Oblige  me  by  preparing 
your  glasses,  I  ana  about  to  give  you  a  toast.  Ladies  and 
Gentlemen!  ("  what  a  great  manner,"  thought  Adeline; 

"d d  puppy,"  thought  Jigger,)  the  distinguished  officer 

whose  flag  we  have  the  honor  to  serve  under,  ("I  ought  to 
have  proposed  this,"  thought  Captain  Plimmer,  with  some 
pique,)  deserves  the  homage  of  our  attention  to-day.  Him- 
self one  of  the  greatest  men  whom  our  naval  history  has 
produced,  and  represented  here  to-day  (Fitz-Gubin  threw 
into  his  voice  a  touch  of  gallantry)  by  the  lustre  of  beauty, 
he  commands  our  reverence,  and  enchants  our  hearts.  I 
propose,  with  all  the  honors,  our  Commander-in-Chief !" 
(Great  enthusiasm.)  Of  course,  the  health  was  most  cor- 
dially responded  to.  Mr.  Thimbleston,  Ensign  of  the  — th, 
observing,  however,  to  a  neighbor,  that  "  the  army  ought 
to  have  taken  precedence  ;  by  Jove,  sir,  why  the  deuce 
didn't  the  army  take  precedence  ?"  and  so  forth. 

By  degrees,  people  strolled  away  from  the  luuching- 
ground,  and  lounged  about  in  the  gardens,  and  chatted. 
Adeline  Wyoming  went  again  to  look  at  the  old  country- 
house  ;  and  as  she  returned,  she  passed  quickly  down  the 
garden  walk,  and  she  put  her  arm  through  her  elder  sister's 
and  drew  her  away  till  they  were  quite  by  themselves. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  127 

"  What's  the  matter,  Adeline  ?"  said  Miss  Wyoming, 
"  you  look  quite  frightened.  What  is  it,  dear  ?" 

"  I  have  been  in  that  old  house  again,  and  in  the  room 
where  we  were — " 

"  You  saw  a  ghost,  you  silly  thing  1"  interrupted  Miss 
Wyoming. 

"  No/'  Adeline  said,  "  but  I  have  found  this." 

And  she  drew  out  a  small  ornament.  It  was  a  thin 
chain  of  very  fine  gold,  and  suspended  to  it  was  a  locket, 
on  which  was  engraved  the  word  "  Marie,"  The  two  girls 
paused,  and  kept  dead  silence  a  moment.  Then  Miss 
Wyoming  (who  had  turned  quite  pale)  said,  "Run  and  put 
it  back,  you  foolish  child,  why  did  you  touch  it  ?" 

"I  was  so  surprised,  I — I — did  not  know  what  I  was 
doing."  The  tears  came  to  the  girl's  eyes. 

"  Give  it  me,"  her  sister  said.  It  needed  no  long  thought 
to  tell  her  who  had  lost  it ;  and  like  a  glimpse  through  the 
dark,  she  saw  now  something  of  Fitz-Gubin's  character. 
The  mystery  of  iniquity  which  underlies  our  social  life,  and 
which  we  ignore  so  determinedly,  docs  now  and  then  cast  a 
shadow,  where  only  the  sunshine  of  purity  should  be. 
Hints  and  chills  (like  those  thrills  of  cold  which  we  feel 
and  cannot  account  for)  tremble  through  the  frame  of  soci- 
ety in  its  garb  of  safety,  and  refinement,  and  purity ;  tell- 
ing of  something  unhealthy  and  unholy  in  the  air. 

Miss  Wyoming  moved  quickly  up  the  garden.  Adeline 
remained  behind ;  she  had  allowed  herself  to  fancy  Fitz- 
Gubin  was  one  who  could  be  loved,  goodness  knows  why ; 
don't  we  see  that  a  bird  will  sit  on  a  stone,  if  it  be  only 
decently  like  an  egg  ?  and  don't  women  give  their  heart- 
warmth  away,  in  this  unprofitable  manner,  constantly? 
The  eldest,  I  say,  moved  quickly  up  the  garden.  She 
would  put  the  locket  in  the  room  again,  and  Fitz-Gubin 
would  be  sure  to  seek  it  there  if  he  missed  it ;  and  then — 


128  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

why  she  would  try  and  not  think  of  it  any  more ;  or  she 
would  save  the  poor  little  girl  from — She  was  full  of  anx- 
iety and  painful  feeling  when  she  approached  the  house,  but 
her  heart  grew  cold  as  she  saw  Fitz-Gubin  enter  it  before 
her.  He  had  gone,  plainly  enough,  to  look  for  the  lost 
locket ;  she  felt  frightened  to  think  that  he  might  come  out 
and  meet  her. 

In  the  meantime,  the  party  were  growing  dull,  and  begin- 
ning to  think  of  moving.  Roribel  was  on  the  move,  and 
crying  "  to  horse,"  with  his  accustomed  liveliness.  He 
walked  up  the  garden-path,  and  the  whole  group  broke  up 
and  spread  themselves  out  into  knots.  Roribel  reached  the 
head  of  the  garden  just  as  Fitz-Gubin  came  out  of  the 
house  with  a  shade  of  annoyance  on  his  brow.  Miss 
Wyoming  was  turning  the  other  way  to  rejoin  her  sisters. 

"To  horse  1"  says  Roribel.  "Why,  Fitz-Gubin,  what's 
the  matter  V9 

"  Oh,  nothing  ;  Fve  been  in  that  old  house  again,  that's 
all." 

"  Well,  did  you  meet  the  ghosts  of  your  ancestors,  or 
what  ?  By  Jove,  I  know  people  in  very  good  society,  who 
would  be  startled  if  they  could  see  their  ancestors,"  said 
Roribel.  They  approached  each  other  nearer  ;  Miss  Wy- 
oming had  meanwhile  moved  quite  away. 

"  But,  hillo  I"  said  Roribel  again,  stooping  suddenly  to 
the  ground,  and  picking  up  something,  "  what's  this  ?  a 
chain  and  a  locket  with  '  Marie'  on  it ;  treasure-trove,  by 
Jove  !" 

Fitz-Gubin  started.     "  Give  it  to  me,  Roribel  1" 

Roribel  was  in  his  most  champagne  mood. 

"  Marie  !  eh,"  cried  he,  holding  it  behind  him,  to  prevent 
Fitz-Gubin  seizing  it,  "  we  must  exhibit  this." 

"Roribel,  don't  be  a  fool,"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  angrily,  and 
very  much  frightened  that  the  Wyomings  would  see  it. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          129 

Roribel  gave  the  locket  to  him,  seeing  him  so  serious. 
Fitz-Gubin  was  delighted  to  recover  it ;  thought  he  must 
have  dropped  it  coming  down  the  garden,  &c. 

But  the  journey  home  was  one  of  the  dullest  ever  known. 
When  one  is  carrying  on  any  wickedness,  one  is  unusually 
suspicious,  and  the  manner  of  the  two  Wyomings  suffi- 
ciently disturbed  Fitz-Gubin.  He  suspected  Miss  Wyo- 
ming had  seen  the  locket  lying  on  the  ground  ;  he  well  knew 
how  it  would  startle  her,  and  in  conjunction  with  previous 
circumstances,  it  would  alarm  and  shock  her.  He  cursed 
his  carelessness  as  he  went  on  board,  and  reproached  him- 
self for  being  a  "fool,"  yet  never  suspected  that  he  was 
anything  worse. 


CHAPTER     VII. 

IT  is  twilight  time,  and  the  bells  of  Malta  are  jingling 
away  as  if  they  wished  to  welcome  the  night  in  enthusiasti- 
cally. English  Malta  is  going  to  dinner.  Malta  proper 
has  dined  long  since,  and  is  airing  or  resting  itself,  and 
happy  in  the  enjoyment  of  a  breeze  which  is  cool  from 
leagues  of  blue  sea.  Malta  proper  is  right  to  dine  early. 
For  delicious  above  all  of  Nature's  delights  is  twilight  in 
the  South.  Nature's  highest  function  is  to  pacify  the  spirit 
and  elevate  the  heart  of  man.  In  warm  climates  you  feel 
more  a  part  of  nature  than  elsewhere.  Hence  from  these 
climates  come  Pantheistic  religions  ;  in  the  North  you  have 
"  frost-giants"  and  the  like — hard  impersonations  of  nature, 
which  is  severe  there,  and  has  to  be  fought  against.  The 
South  merges  you  in  the  universal :  the  North  sharpens 
your  individuality.  The  South  produces  despots,  emblems 
of  the  universal :  the  North  aristocracies,  embodiments  of 
great  individualities.  And  so  might  we  go  on  to  contrast 

6* 


130  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

and  compare,  but  that  our  duty  calls  us  to  the  personages 
of  our  story,  and  to  the  events  which  we  have  in  hand. 

We  are  in  the  twilight,  I  say,  of  the  auiumn,  when  all 
these  events  of  ours  happened.  The  harbor  is  alive  with 
boats,  for  the  court-martial  on  Captain  Pappleton  and  his 
officers  for  losing  the  Bloater  is  just  over — the  second  day 
has  concluded  the  matter  ;  and  at  every  dinner  in  the  har- 
bor the  SENTENCE  is  discussed.  Was  it  fair  to  Bluffett,  the 
master?  Who  knows  Bluffett?  Are  not  all  these  Papple- 
tons  notorious  gabies  ?  How  did  Hackles  give  his  evidence  ? 
Had  Captain  Bobbles  a  right  to  sit  ?  Huge  subjects  of  dis- 
cussion, which  accompany  (but  do  not  retard)  the  discus- 
sion of  the  Brimbousky  marine  and  other  luxuries  ;  and  on 
the  whole,  perhaps,  give  a  stimulus  to  the  consumption  of 
the  iced  wine,  so  grateful  in  that  climate.  There  can  be 
no  great  harm  in  gliding  into  the  gun-room  of  the  Sovereign, 
and  just  learning  a  little  about  the  particulars  of  the  trial. 
For  our  friend  Forbessy  is  cast  loose  on  the  service  again 
by  the  dispersion  of  the  Bloater's  officers  and  crew,  which 
is  decided  on ;  and  Forbessy  is  to  figure  before  the  reader 
in  various  pages  yet,  before  we  have  done  with  him,  what- 
ever may  become  of  our  Fitz-Gubins  and  others. 

"  Have  not  had  such  a  trial  for  a  long  time,"  says  Sid- 
dlington  ;  "  not  since  Terry  ton  was  tried  for  insubordi- 
nation." 

"There  is  a  piquancy  about  an  insubordination  trial  which 
you  don't  have  in  a  mere  loss  of  a  ship  case,  though,"  says 
Beaulieu,  talking  of  the  affair  as  hunters  do  of  a  "  run." 

"  Yes,"  Riddel  said,  "  Ricks  was  good.  His  telling  the 
timid  witness  that  he  had  a  head  like  a  scupper-nail  was 
calculated  to  calm  the  poor  fellow." 

"Ah,  ha!  and  I  thought  it  excellent  when  he  asked 
where  the  midshipmen  were,  and  looked  so  sulky  when 
nothing  whatever  appeared  against  them  !" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  131 

"  Did  you  see  Pappletou  shed  a  manly  tear  during  the 
defence  ?"  inquired  a  midshipman,  in  rather  an  unfeeling 
tone.  (Cuckles  made  a  mental  note  about  him.) 

"  Yery  good  defence,  too  ;  Hookins's,  I  suppose  ?"  asked 
Beaulieu. 

"  Yes.  I  know  that  touch  about  the  { memory  of  unfor- 
tunate disasters  being  a  punishment  in  itself.'  He  got  old 
Stokey  off  with  loss  of  a  year,  for  being  drunk  in  the  middle 
watch  in  the  Fandango,  by  that  one  stroke,  I  believe  I" 

"  I  remain  of  opinion  that  Mrs.  Pappleton  should  have 
been  tried,"  said  Pug  Welby. 

"  By ,"  began  old  Manton,  "  when  Fowler  lost  the 

Porcupine — in  '18, — off  Devil's  Head,  (by not  a  com- 
pass that  would  work  in  the  ship — there  wasn't,)  and  the 

sails  were  all  worn,  and  by it  blew  as  it  never  blew 

on  the  coast  of  Spain — he  didn't  come  off  so  cheap  I  can 
tell  you  !  '  Reprimanded,'  indeed  !  They  reprimanded 
you  with  a  d — d  good  breaking,  and  if  need  be,  brought* a 
youngster  to  the  gun,  &c.,  &c."  I  cut  short  Manton,  as 
indeed  the  mess  did,  by  the  various  laughs  and  exclama- 
tions which  he  produced.  Poor  old  gentleman  !  He  was 
one  of  a  breed  gone  by  now,  of  whom  the  last  will  soon  be 
laid  by  the  side  of  the  pigtails  of  the  dead  generation. 

This  speech  of  old  Manton  has  revealed  to  you  the  result 
of  the  trial  to  Pappleton.  He  was  "  reprimanded ;"  but 
Bluffett,  the  master,  was  " reprimanded  severely"  and  was 
not  to  be  employed  for  a  year.  Everybody  else  was  ac- 
quitted. What  then  remained  to  do  in  the  case  of  the 
Bloater,  but  what  good  housewives  do  with  domestic  break- 
ages— viz.,  to  pick  up  the  pieces?  For  that  purpose,  a 
ship  was  sent  to  the  scene  of  the  wreck,  which  brought 
away  the  lower  masts  and  rudder  in  tow  ;  and  (the  head 
authorities  at  Malta  regretting  that  Mrs.  Pappleton  had 
lost  her  wardrobe)  there  the  matter  ended  !  Captain  Pap- 


132  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

pleton  was  "  hereby  reprimanded  accordingly  " — which  did 
not  spoil  his  dinner — and  after  much  sympathy  from  the 
good-natured  Wyomings,  he  and  Mrs.  P.  went  to  England 
luxuriously,  in  one  of  the  "  Peninsular  and  Oriental"  boats. 
He  has  been  employed  since,  too,  (as  you  will  be  glad  to 
hear,  and  as  we  all  ought  to  be  proud  to  know,)  and  I  be- 
lieve Mrs.  Pappleton  will  often  talk  over  the  loss  of  the 
Bloater  in  her  nautical  way,  and  tell  you  that  if  they  had 
"worn"  at  6  P.  M.,  or  kept  W.  and  by  S.  after  3,  or  other- 
wise done  something  which  they  did  not  do,  the  Bloater 
would  not  have  been  lost. 

The  talk  about  the  "sentence"  having  flagged,  while  the 
mess  were  still  at  their  wine,  Beaulieu  looked  round ;  and 
observing  that  many  of  the  fellows,  who  were  not  in  the 
best  set,  had  gone  out  of  the  gun-room,  said  quietly,  "  I 
did  not  tell  you  my  adventure  last  night !" 

Men  pricked  up  their  ears.  "I  don't  think  the  affair  of 
any  consequence,  to  be  sure,"  continued  Beaulieu,  care- 
lessly. "  But  I  was  passing  along  an  obscure  street,  and  a 
fellow  tried  to  stab  me  !" — Beaulieu  sipped  some  wine. 

Fitz-Gubin  looked  up.  Forbessy  looked  up.  The  eyes 
of  these  young  men  seemed  to  meet  naturally,  somehow, 
and  having  met,  to  turn  away  again,  rather  hurriedly. 
Forbessy  looked  especially  serious,  and  there  was  trouble 
in  the  expression  of  his  gray  eyes. 

"The  deuce  he  did!"  Riddel  said.  "How  do  you  ac- 
count for  it  ?" 

"  Nay  ;  who  knows  ?  He  must  have  taken  me  for  some- 
body else.  In  warding  off  the  blow,  I  showed  him  my  face  ; 
the  man  made  no  other  attempt,  and  vanished  1" 

"'Gad,  Riddel  says.  "There  are  not  many  of  your 
inches,  either  !  Stand  up,  Beaulieu,  and  show  us  how  you 
were  walking." 

Beaulieu  smiled,  and  stood  up.     Truly,  he  was  a  goodly 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  133 

length  of  a  man,  Beaulieu.  He  was  the  son  of  an  Admiral 
Beaulieu  ;  but  he  and  his  father  bore  a  likeness  to  a  family 
more  illustrious  than  any  known  under  that  gentile  appella- 
tion. Who  knows  the  exact  truth  ?  Yet,  few  who  were 
up  to  high  scandals,  doubted  whence  father  and  son  inherit- 
ed the  high  manner,  the  royal  air.  Their  personal  qualities 
had  not  suffered,  as  their  escutcheon  had,  from  the  brand 
of  the  bastard's  bar  ! 

"  There's  not  so  tall  a  man  in  the  mess,  and  consequently 
not  in  the  squadron,"  said  Riddel.  "  We  whop  the  squad- 
ron in  everything,  in  horses,  in  Madeira,  in  Palestine  soup, 
in  exercising  sails."  (He  classified,  you  observe,  in  a  cha- 
racteristic order. 

"  Forbessy  is  two  inches  less,"  said  Siddlington. 

"  I  am,"  said  Forbessy,  quietly. 

"  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  I  think,  is  as  tall,  though,"  said  Cuck- 
les.  (Foolish  Cuckles,  he  didn't  know  what  he  was  about.) 

"Ah,  Fitz-Gubin,  measure  !"  Riddel  said. 

Fitz-Gubin  was  sulky  that  evening;  but  he  rose,  and 
stood  up  back  to  back  with  Beaulieu.  Their  heights  were, 
indeed,  much  the  same.  A  joke  or  two  was  made  on  the 
point,  and  on  Beaulieu's  story,  but  Fitz-Gubin  was  quite  out 
of  his  usual,  cool,  indifferent  tone  of  manner.  He  was  icy 
and  fretful — prickly  with  icicles  of  manner,  if  I  may  be 
permitted  such  a  figure.  The  party  broke  up  somewhat 
abruptly ;  the  men  went  to  smoke  on  the  main  deck,  or  to 
get  ready  to  go  on  shore,  or  to  whatever  else  they  designed 
for  the  evening's  employment.  And  among  the  smoking 
party,  Riddel  drew  his  chair  alongside  Beaulieu's,  and 
opened  a  chat  with  him.  First  of  all,  Riddel  told  the 
handsome  Beaulieu,  that  there  was  no  doubt  that  he  had 
been  taken  for  Fitz-Gubin,  and  that  he  certainly  would  be 
stabbed  instead  of  him  if  he  didn't  take  care.  He  reminded 
him  of  Fitz-Gubin's  previous  adventure. 


134  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  He  is  such  a  deuced  mysterious  fellow  I"  continued  Rid- 
del. "If  be  would  tell  one  what  he  was  about,  one  might 
be  warned.  But  there  is  no  knowing  all  that  fellow's  mys- 
teries   By  Jove,  there  he  goes  on  shore  now,  in 

plain  clothes  !" 

Sure  enough,  the  long  figure  of  Fitz-Gubin  was  seen 
gliding  up  the  companion  ladder,  and  in  a  few  minutes  the 
young  men  saw  through  an  open  port  a  boat  shooting  away 
towards  the  landing-place. 

Beaulieu  had  much  of  the  shrewdness  and  elegance,  and 
much  of  the  personal  tastes  of  his  father  the  admiral,  and 
his  grandfather,  the  admiral's  Parent.  (Let  us  dignify  the 
great  progenitor  of  the  Beaulieus  with  a  capital,  at  all 
events.) 

" Well,"  said  Beaulieu,  "it  is  very  convenient  to  make 
love  personally,  and  get  stabbed  for  it — by  proxy  !" 

"  Do  you  know,"  said  Riddel — who  was  a  trifle  feather- 
headed,  and  flew  backwards  and  forwards  between  facts,  as 
a  bird  does  between  trees,  undecided  where  to  light — "  the 
case  must  stand  thus  : — Your  assailant  was  the  cad  of  the 

fair-way  buoy,  who but  then  you  were  not  of  that 

party.  But,  stop.  He  wanted  to  get  at  Fitz-Gubin  ;  and 
I  suppose  he  is  the  brother  of  some  girl  that  Fitz-Gubin 
has  been  making  love  to." 

"And  I  am  to  be  sacrificed  to  her,  like  a  lamb  to  Yenus  !" 
said  Mr.  Beaulieu. 

"  He  will  get  himself  into  some  terrible  scrape,"  Riddel 
went  on.  "  For  my  part,  I  hate  your  adventures,  and 
watchings,  and  knives,  and  rope-ladders,  in  such  matters." 

"  You  are  of  Horace's  opinion,"  said  Beaulieu,  who 
thought  that  a  "  gentleman  "  ought  to  know  Horace,  and 
only  studied  certain  authors  whom  he  thought  a  "  gentle- 
man" ought  to  know,  besides  him  :  "Amo  Vemrem  facilem" 
&c. 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  135 

'•  I  am  glad  Horace  and  I  agree,"  said  Riddel.  "  But, 
by  Jove,  too,  (he  went  on  expounding  the  half-moral  code, 
which  he  and  many  other  young  fellows  hold  in  our  day,) — 
by  Jove,  I  say,  it  is  not  fair  to  be  always  following  up  a 
chase  of  this  kind  like  a  red  Indian  on  a  track.  Hang  it, 
if  an  apple  drops  into  one's  mouth,  well  and  good ;  but 
don't  go  sneaking  like  a  burglar  over  the  orchard  wall." 
Whereupon,  Riddel,  thinking  he  had  made  an  ethical  hit, 
sucked  some  sherry-and-water,  and  hugged  himself  as  a  good 
fellow. 

"  There  is  a  great  deal  of  sound  English  feeling  about 
that  sentiment,"  said  Beaulieu,  with  a  grin.  "  Let's  take  a 
turn  on  deck." 

They  left  the  main  deck  and  found  the  night  lovely.  They 
mounted  to  the  poop,  and  commenced  a  pleasant  turn  there. 
The  stars  were  out  in  the  heaven,  and  the  winds  loose  upon 
the  sea. 

" Who's  that  on  the  other  side?"  asked  Riddel.  He 
spoke  of  a  figure  which  was  leaning  over  the  side  of  the 
bulwarks,  and  looking  towards  the  shore. 

Riddel  strolled  over  to  see.  The  figure  did  not  move. 
He  returned,  and  told  Beaulieu  :  it  was  Forbessy. 

"Ah,  a  quiet,  and  rather  melancholy  fellow,"  Beaulieu 
remarked,  as  they  leaned  over  the  bulwarks  of  their  side. 
"  Never  saw  him,  till  he  joined  a  few  weeks  ago.  Seems  of 
a  good  family,  and  not  rich  ;  affectionate,  but  without 
chums ;  earnest,  with  no  particular  beliefs  ;  and  clever, 
without  having  decided  what  he  will  make  his  cleverness 
do !" 

"  Why,  Beaulieu,  what  an  infernal  observer  you  are," 
Riddel  said,  with  an  astonished  air.  "  I  scarcely  ever  saw 
you  speak  to  Forbessy." 

Beaulieu  laughed,  looked  down  at  the  water,  and  said 
nothing. 


136  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  I  tell  you  what  I  remark,"  Riddel  went  on,  sharpened 
by  Beaulieu's  example,  "Forbessy  and  Fitz-Gubin  never 
speak  to  each  other,  now  I  think  of  it." 

"  Let  us  come  over  and  see  what  Forbessy's  about,"  said 
Beaulieu.  "  Do  you  know  that  *  attempted  assassination/ 
as  the  papers  would  call  it,  has  made  me  curious  about  one 
or  two  things." 

They  moved  across  the  poop,  as  he  suggested.  Forbessy 
was  leaning  in  the  same  place  still,  and  watching  the  line  of 
shore.  In  the  tranquillity  of  the  night,  the  harbor  and  the 
town,  seen  from  the  Sovereign's  high  poop,  seemed  to  hang 
like  a  curtain  spangled  with  lights.  Lights  shifted  to  and 
fro,  and  played  in  and  out — from  houses,  along  the  water's 
edge — from  boats.  It  was  the  picture,  perhaps,  that  For- 
bessy was  so  interested  in  ;  the  picture  of  that  stillness 
pierced  by  those  lights,  under  such  a'  sweet  sky,  and  full  of 
so  many  associations. 

Forbessy  turned  as  the  young  men  joined  him.  "  What 
a  fine  night  it  is,"  he  said. 

"  You  seem  interested  in  the  look  of  the  town  to-night," 
said  Beaulieu,  good-naturedly. 

"  I  was  looking  at — at  the  town,  in  fact,"  replied  our 
friend  rather  vaguely.  "  What's  the  time,  I  wonder  ? 
About  nine,  I  suppose  ;  and  this  is  the  fourteenth." 

"  This  is  the  fourteenth,"  Riddel  answered,  "  I  believe. 
I  hope  I  shall  hear  from  my  aunt  by  next  mail !  And  now 
I  think  of  it,  I  shall  go  on  shore  this  evening."  So  saying, 
Mr.  Riddel  (whose  ideas  had  been  set  into  a  new  train  by 
the  sudden  reminiscence  of  his  aunt)  departed. 

"  Mr.  Beaulieu,"  said  Forbessy,  turning  round  briskly 
to  that  gentleman,  with  whom  he  was  now  left  alone,  "  I 
listened  with  interest  to  your  story  in  the  gun-room.  Per- 
mit me  to  tell  you  that  there  is  danger  to  be  apprehended 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  137 

f 

by  you — as  I  clearly  see  from  the  circumstances  which  you 
recounted  ;  as,  in  fact,  I  may  say,  I  know." 

"  Indeed,"  Beaulieu  said,  in  a  quiet  and  composed  way ; 
"  really  there  seems  an  unwonted  degree  of  mystery  and  an 
unusual  atmosphere  of  romance  pervading  H.  M.  S.  Sove- 
reign and  Malta,  just  now." 

"  There  is  always  more  of  both,  everywhere,  than  people 
readily  believe,"  Forbessy  said.  "  But,  Mr.  Beaulieu,"  he 
continued,  "  I  will  open  myself  to  you  more  frankly.  We 
have  not  been  long  in  company  in  the  ship  ;  nevertheless,  1 
nave  seen  enough  of  you  to  know  that  you  are  melancholy 
for  want  of  definite  convictions  about  life  ;  friendly,  without 
having  confidants  ;  and — but  the  rest  might  sound  like 
flattery — suffice  it  to  say  that  the  rest  gives  interest  to  the 
other  phenomena  I  have  observed  !" 

"Why,"  said  Beaulieu,  "you  echo  the  very  remarks 
which  I  made,  not  half  an  hour  ago,  about  yourself." 

"  Nature,  then,  intended  us  to  be  friends,"  said  Forbessy. 

"  So  be  it,"  said  Beaulieu. 

As  they  walked  together  for  half  an  hour  in  the  moon- 
light, arm  and  arm,  Forbessy  told  Beaulieu  a  story  which 
interested  him  a  good  deal.  What  is  needful  for  us  to  know 
of  it,  we  shall  know  at  the  proper  time.  Meanwhile,  I 
would  just  say,  apropos  of  the  eternal  question  of  the  age  and 
its  reforms — might  we  not,  considering  the  many  editions 
of  the  De  Amidtia  which  we  possess  ;  and  by  way  of  doing 
a  little  instalment  towards  reform  of  a  more  profound  sort, 
than  giving  expression  to  the  enlightened  wisdom  of  "  ,£10 
householders  ;"  might  we  not,  I  say,  achieve  a  little  stroke 
of  "  reform "  by  privately  worshipping  and  recognizing, 
more  than  we  do,  the  antique  sacredness  of  the  sentiment 
of  friendship  ? 


138  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 


CHAPTER    VIII. 

THERE  was  a  rumor  spread  about  the  circles  of  the  Sove- 
reign (for  is  not  a  line-of-battle  ship  a  kind  of  town,  and 
with  as  many  degrees  and  circles  in  it  as  any  town  of  them 
all  ?)  that  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  had  "got  leave,"  and  was  go- 
ing over  to  Sicily  to  shoot.  He  encouraged,  however,  no 
curiosity  that  anybody  might  feel  on  the  subject.  In  fact, 
he  withdrew  himself,  more  than  ever,  from  society  in  the 
Sovereign.  He  kept  his  watch,  dined — when  he  did  not 
dine  on  shore — at  mess,  and  kept  up,  to  be  sure,  an  ac- 
quaintance with  Riddel,  Siddlington,  and  others,  and  used 
Cuckles,  but  slight  was  the  intimacy  which  any  of  them  at- 
tained with  him.  If  Siddlington  had  ever  formed  a  vision 
of  himself  as  a  guest  at  Castellan,  and  a  successful  wooer 
of  a  Lady  Eleanora  there,  Siddlington  must,  by  the  time 
at  which  we  have  now  arrived,  have  seen  that  it  was  a 
vision  indeed.  Other  Jacobs,  whose  dreams  had  revealed 
to  them  ladders  up  to  high  life,  had  awakened  too.  The 
impenetrable,  selfish  easiness,  and  mysterious  and  solitary, 
yet  common-place  nature  of  Fitz-Gubin,  kept  everybody  off. 
Nay,  a  party  actually  formed  to  quiz  him  !  One  or  two 
men  used  to  try  to  draw  him  out  by  hypocritical  devices, 
encouraging  the  immense  latent  pride  of  the  man  to  show 
itself ;  teasing  him  as  you  might  tease  a  tortoise,  and,  per- 
haps, by  a  sudden  turn,  toppling  him  over  on  his  back,  and 
leaving  him  helpless  !  For  one  of  these  conventional  gen- 
tlemen, once  out  of  the  protection  of  social  convention, 
rudely  brought  in  contact  with  nature,  is  as  helpless  as  a 
tortoise  in  that  position.  Jigger  once,  seeing  him  with  a 
collar  of  unrivalled  finish  and  stiffness,  exclaimed,  in  his  fine 
bluff  way,  "  Well,  d — n  it,  Fitz-Gubin,  nothing  does  so  take 
in  the  public  as  an  imposing  gill !"  Fitz-Gubin  turned  as 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  139 

pale  as  death  !  Another  time  the  conversation  was  led  to 
the  subject  of  expensive  living  in  messes.  Fitz-Gubin  won- 
dered, after  some  careful  drawing-out  from  our  wicked 
clique,  "how  the  deuce  some  fellows  managed  to  live  in  the 
service,  now-a-days."  By-and-by,  in  a  moment  of  farther 
encouragement,  he  said  that  "  he  would  be  worse  off  with 
two  hundred  a-year  than  others  with  a  third  of  it,  having 
his  rank  to  keep  up,"  and  so  forth.  But  he  was  very  know- 
ing in  his  way,  and  had  once  or  twice  seen  glances  pass  be- 
tween men  which  he  did  not  like.  Beaulieu,  (the  villain,) 
who  was  "up"  to  the  facts  about  the  connection  of  the  Fitz- 

Gubins  with  P ,  showed  an  inclination  to  hint  at  that 

old  story  one  day,  and  it  was  all  Forbessy  could  do  to  keep 
him  off  the  dangerous  ground.  Latterly,  however,  For- 
bessy and  Beaulieu,  still  more  together  than  ever,  put  them- 
selves less  and  less  in  Fitz-Gubin's  way.  Such  was  the 
state  of  things  when  the  above-mentioned  rumor  about  his 
shootiug  expedition  got  wind. 

The  intimacy  between  Forbessy  and  Beaulieu  caused  a 
good  deal  of  curiosity  among  the  gentlemen  of  the  Sove- 
reign. What  would  a  mess  be  without  those  combinations 
and  antipathies,  those  personal  likes  and  dislikes  which 
divide  its  society,  and  give  piquancy  to  its  daily  life  !  A 
large  mess  is  like  a  town,  and  its  society  includes  as  many 
conflicting  elements.  Often  there  is  an  intrigue  going  for- 
ward— a  mystery  slowly  evolving  itself — of  which  numbers 
of  those  who  breakfast  and  dine  together,  day  after  day, 
never  have  a  suspicion.  Poor  Charley  Wremond  dies,  and 
we  learn  that  he  had  run  away  with  a  ward  in  Chancery, 
and  had  a  family  of  little  ones  of  whose  existence  we  never 
dreamed.  No  wonder  Charley  was  wont  to  be  serious  at 
times  when  we  were  piqued  at  his  being  "  slow !"  Jack 
Montacute  is  going  to  fight  a  duel  with  Sandwich  the  next 
port  we  come  to  ;  but  they  must  dine  together  meanwhile, 


140  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

and  nobody  must  guess  that  there  is  anything  of  the  kind 
meditated  between  them.  What  made  Bellomorit  so 
friendly  with  Tangueray  ?  He  was  his  natural  brother,  my 
dear  sir  ;  hence  the  peculiar  felicity  of  Bung's  constant  joke 
about  the  likeness  between  them  !  Yes,  romance  underlies 
us  everywhere  in  society,  as  the  mystery  of  life  underlies  the 
fair  city  and  country  life  we  mingle  in,  and  the  existence  we 
enjoy ;  to  both,  however,  the  fool  (to  his  gain,  and  also  to 
his  loss)  is  blind  and  deaf. 

Forbessy  and  Beaulieu  are  sitting  at  the  stern  ports  of 
the  gun-room  early  in  the  morning.  It  is  near  the  hour  for 
taking  a  shore-boat  to  Bighi  Bay  to  bathe.  A  marine  is 
cleaning  Fitz-Gubin's  gun  ;  an  operation  watched  with  inte- 
rest by  one  or  two  men  who  happened  to  be  up  as  early  as  our 
friends.  He  performs  the  operation  in  their  presence,  and 
in  the  mess-room  ;  for,  of  course,  they  must  take  an  inte- 
rest in  anything  belonging  to  so  notable  a  man. 

Latimer  watches  the  process ;  remarks  that'  he  thinks 
Fitz-Grubin  will  have  a  fine  time  of  it ;  and,  by-the-by,  where 
is  he  going  to  shoot  ?  Is  he  going  to  Sicily,  or  where  ? 

Forbessy  looked  at  Beaulieu  in  that  d d  mysterious 

way  (I  borrow  this  expression  from  Latimer)  in  which  these 
gentlemen  occasionally  interchanged  glances.  They  rose 
presently,  and  made  for  the  door. 

"  Going  to  bathe  ?"  Latimer  called  out.  Beaulieu  waved 
a  towel  in  his  hand,  by  way  of  answer  ;  and  in  a  minute 
they  were  in  a  shore-boat.  Out  glided  the  heavy  green  and 
yellow  boat,  with  awning  spread,  from  the  Sovereign's  side 
towards  the  harbor's  mouth — the  faithful  Maltese  (for  the 
Maltese  is  among  the  most  devoted  and  obedient  of  man- 
kind, when  kindly  treated)  rising  and  falling  as  he  plied  the 
oars,  industrious  and  contented.  "  Bighi,  sir  ?"  he  asks. 
"  Yes,  Jocko,"  says  Beaulieu,  good-naturedly  enough,  (for 
B.  is  a  gentleman  in  all  ways,)  but  with  the  same  kindness 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  141 

with  which  he  would  give  an  apple  to  a  monkey ;  for  B.  is 
an  Englishman,  dealing  with  a  subject  of  another  race. 

Forbessy  and  Beaulieu  said  little  at  first.  The  morn- 
ing was  opening  up  into  a  fine  day.  They  were  content  to 
see  the  forts  relieve  with  their  deep  hues  the  blue  monotony 
of  the  sea — the  life  spreading  itself  along  the  harbor's 
edges — the  stately  masts  of  the  few  men-of-war  in  harbor 
tapering  away  into  the  sky — and  to  let  the  picture  sink  into 
their  minds  in  peace.  The  boat  with  a  heavy  motion  drew 
farther  and  farther  out,  and  the  Maltese  brushed  away  his 
curly  hair,  and  paused  a  moment. 

"  That's  her  !"  said  Forbessy,  suddenly. 

Beaulieu  looked  up,  and  saw  in  the  line  of  the  pointed 
finger  a  merchant-brig  lying.  There  was  nothing  peculiar 
in  her  appearance  to  distinguish  her  from  any  Annie  Jane  or 
Isabella  Briggs  sent  out  by  our  country. 

"Row  to  the  brig,"  said  Beaulieu  to  their  boatman,  point- 
ing to  her.  The  Maltese  obeyed,  and  soon  brought  them 
close  to  her.  A  head  popped  over  the  side  with  no  very 
welcome  expression,  and  said,  "What  d'ye  want,  master?77 

"Go  alongside/'  said  Forbessy  to  the  Maltese,  and  with- 
out giving  the  head  any  answer,  up  jumped  Beaulieu,  up 
jumped  Forbessy,  and  stood  on  the  brig's  deck.  The  head — 
which  was  no  less  a  head  than  a  skipper's — was  set  on  a 
short  little  carcase.  The  skipper  was  no-way  pleased  to 
see  his  visitors,  but,  with  hands  in  pockets,  looked  up  at 
them,  inquiringly 

"You  take  passengers,"  said  Beaulieu,  glancing  round 
with  a  cool  air  of  observation. 

"There  you're  wrong,"  said  the  short  skipper,  briefly. 

"  You  never  take  passengers,  eh?"  asked  Beaulieu. 

"There  you're  wrong  again,"  said  the  little  skipper. 

"Your  ears  are  longer  than  your  tongue,  I  think,  my 
good  man,"  said  Beaulieu,  ineffably  cool,  and  with  the 


142  SWELL   LITE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"great  air"  which  he  knew  Low  to  put  on.  "But  waiving 
any  attempts  at  epigram,  which  are  ludicrously  unsuited  to 
your  social  position,  suppose  you  show  us  your  cabin  ?" 

"We  come  from  the  Sovereign,  I  may  mention,"  put  in 
Forbessy,  carelessly 

"  Oh  !"  The  little  skipper  began  looking  round,  and 
assuming  a  very  knowing  expression — "Friends  of  Lord 
Fitz-Gubin's,  I  see  1" 

The  eyes  of  our  friends  met  instanter. 

"  So  far  so  good,"  said  Beaulieu,  enigmatically.  "  Let 
us  see  the  cabin,  then." 

The  skipper  paused.  "  Did  you  say  friends  of  Lord  Fitz- 
Gubin's,  sir  ?"  asked  the  skipper. 

"Skipper!"  said  Beaulieu,  "I  did  not  say  so.  Permit 
me,  however,  to  make  it  plain  that  we  must  see  your  cabin. 
Why,  I  ought  not  to  explain  :  I  may  want  a  passage.  If 
you  wish  me  to  say  more,  I  have  more  to  say;  but  I  will 
be  content  with  a  look  at  your  cabin." 

The  skipper  hesitated,  but  he  yielded.  They  followed 
him  down  his  cabin  ladder. 

"  There,  now,  gentlemen,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin's  taken  that 
berth  ;  that  I  s'pose  you  know." 

There  was  nothing  specially  curious  about  the  place  des- 
tined to  receive  Fitz-Gubin.  It  was  not  so  luxurious  as 
one  would  suppose  Fitz-Gubin  would  wish  it  to  be.  They 
looked  at  it  and  paused.  The  skipper  seemed  puzzled  and 
uneasy,  and  watched  them. 

"When  do  you  sail?"  asked  Beaulieu  abruptly. 

"I  think  to-night." 

"  Well,"  said  Beaulieu,  suddenly  becoming  quite  free-and- 
easy  in  his  manner,  "I  dare  say  Fitz-Gubin  will  have  a 
nice  passage  of  it.  A  devilish  pleasant  cabin  you  have. 
He  dines  with  you,  no  doubt — finds  his  own  wine — takes 
the  run  of  your  prog — and  will  have  a  fowl  occasionally,  if 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  113 

the  hen-coops  are  not  washed  overboard.  We  need  not 
wait,  I  think,"  said  Beaulieu,  with  a  twinkle  of  his  eye  at 
Forbessy. 

The  skipper  brightened  up,  and  a  weight  seemed  taken 
off  his  mind. 

"  Skipper  1"  said  Beaulieu,  fixing  his  eyes  upon  him  with 
a  look  like  a  rapier  thrust,  "  where  do  you  stow  lady  pas- 
sengers ?" 

The  little  man  gave  a  start  back.  He  was  so  manifestly 
upset  that  there  was  no  concealing  it.  "  Who  are  you  sir  ?" 
he  said,  "and  what  do  you  want  with  me?  That's  what 
I  want  to  know." 

"My  good  man,  I  am  an  officer  in  her  Majesty's  service, 
who  takes  some  interest  in  the  brig  Victor.  You  must 
have  seen  that  I  know  what  I  am  about,  and  am  not  to  be 
trifled  with.  First,  you  must  show  me  the  cabin  taken  for 
a  young  lady  some  weeks  ago  ;  second,  you  had  better  say 
nothing  about  this  visit  ;  third,  you  had  better  sail  at  your 
appointed  time,  and  not  mind  about  all  your  passengers 
being  on  board  :  you  know  whom  you  expect  first  1" 

The  skipper  made  no  resistance  nor  remonstrance.  He 
showed  them  into  the  cabin.  Forbessy  came  with  Beaulieu 
to  the  door  of  it.  Truly  it  was  a  snug  little  nest — with  a 
snow-white  little  crib — wherein  a  fairy  might  nestle,  and  be 
lulled  by  the  murmur  of  the  sea.  Forbessy  peeped  in  in 
silence,  and  turned  away  with  a  sigh.  Beaulieu  moved 
away,  drawing  the  skipper  by  the  arm ;  in  that  instant 
Forbessy  slipped  a  letter  under  the  pillow. 

As  they  got  on  deck,  Beaulieu  gave  his  card  to  the  skip- 
per, and  said,  "  Some  day  I  may  do  you  a  turn  if  you  be- 
have yourself  ;  meanwhile,  good  morning  !"  But  the  little 
man  expressed  no  cordial  wish  that  they  should  ever  meet 
again  ;  they  saw  his  head  at  the  gangway  as  they  were  rowed 
away,  watching  them,  unmoved,  till  it  dwindled  to  a  speck. 


144  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Meanwhile,  breakfast  was  laid  in  the  gun-room.  Up  from 
the  cockpit  came  the  fellows  of  the  mess.  Here  was  lively 
Riddel,  polite  Siddlington,  artful  Cuckles,  Latimer  the  sim- 
ple, and  Manton  the  gruff,  with  many  more.  Rasper,  the 
steward's  assistant,  brings  endless  eggs  ;  Riddel,  the  extra- 
vagant, orders  wine.  Now  is  the  hour  for  reminiscences  of 
last  night,  and  endless  varieties  of  squadron  news.  Now 
glide  away,  with  various  expressions  of  face,  the  infinite 
varieties  also  of  the  genus  Dun.  Pallid  but  pertinacious 
Tosta,  eager  and  pimpled  Sarjan,  humorous  but  inflexible 
Baldero,  you  have  been  dodging  about  the  cockpit  the  last 
hour  ;  it  is  now  time  for  you  to  go.  Most  implicitly  do  I 
believe  you  when  you  say  you  will  call  to-morrow  ! 

The  eggs,  the  squadron,  the  duns  are  discussed  together. 
"  Gad  1  I  dreamed  last  night  I  paid  Baldero  !"  said  a 
youngster,  chipping  his  egg. 

"  You  fellows  affect  duns,"  said  Riddel.  "  You  think  it  fine 
to  be  dunned.  Mark  me,  lads,  the  day  will  come  when  the 
fun  will  vanish  out  of  these  bills,  and  leave  a  balance  you 
won't  like  !" 

Everybody  is  impressed,  for  everybody  feels  that  the 
speaker  ought  to  know. 

But  at  this  moment — enter  Fitz-Gubin.  Forbessy  and 
Beaulieu  both  look  at  him.  You  might  see  Forbessy's  lip 
quiver  if  you  cared  to  watch  him.  Fitz-Gubin  is  in  mufti — 
bran-new  semi-sporting  rig.  He  is  a  little  pale,  but  this 
may  be  our  fancy,  who  have  been  peeping  at  his  secrets  j 
yes,  he  is  a  litte  pale,  and  has  a  more  serious  expression  than 
usual.  He  takes  his  usual  seat  up  among  the  leading  sen- 
iors, with  the  usual  quiet  mechanical  air  of  superiority,  and 
the  steward  (whose  aristocratic  predilections  are  well 
known)  attends  to  him  in  person.  Fitz-Gubin  eats  an  egg, 
consumes  toast,  drinks  a  cup  of  tea  ;  then  remarks,  that  the 
day  seems  fine,  and  wonders  whether  the  breeze  will  hold. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  145 

Fitz-Gubin  threw  out  a  remark  occasionally  to  an  audi- 
ence, as  one  scatters  crumbs  to  birds,  with  a  careless  good- 
nature that  seemed  to  say,  "  Eat,  and  be  filled."  Cuckles 
hastened  to  observe,  that  the  day  was  fine,  and  to  hope  that 
the  breeze  would  hold. 

"Think  of  going  to-day?"  called  out  Beaulieu.  Fitz- 
Gubin  did  not  hear  him.  Beaulieu  kept  his  eye  fixed  in  a 
somewhat  impressive  manner  on  him  ;  so  Cuckles,  fearing 
mischief,  called  his  attention  to  Beaulieu. 

"  I  beg  your  pardon,  Mr.  Beaulieu  ?"  Fitz-Gubin's  man- 
ner was,  indeed,  tremendous  in  its  politeness.  Bung  was 
awed,  and  tried  to  imitate  the  style,  afterwards,  at  the  grog 
tub. 

"  Are  you  going  to-day  ?"  repeated  Beaulieu. 

"  Perhaps  so.  My  intentions  are  not  quite  definite." 
Bung  was  lost  in  admiration  ;  Cuckles  felt  himself  ele- 
vated. 

Beaulieu  said  no  more,  at  that  moment,  and  Cuckles  and 
others  doubted  not  that  he  felt  himself  rebuked.  And  so 
breakfast  passed  off,  and  men  dispersed. 

Breakfast  once  well  over,  our  friends  Forbessy  aud  Beau- 
lieu  disappeared.  We,  however,  who  know  what  they  are 
about,  will  follow  them  on  shore.  They  march  briskly 
through  several  streets,  and  pause  at  a  place  where  horses 
are  to  be  had.  All  the  way  along,  Forbessy  has  been  seri- 
ous, not  to  say  gloomy.  He  has  carried  on  a  kind  of  mon- 
ologue, to  which  Beaulieu  has  listened  with  the  faithful 
patience  of  a  friend. 

"  There,"  says  Forbessy,  "  there  was  the  street.  That 
was  the  church.  A  church,  by-the-by,  which  is  an  emblem 
of  all  Europe  ;  for  over  the  graves  of  dead  earnestness  and 
greatness,  populace  gather,  and  boobies  prate.  (I  saw 
Bagman,  Esq.,  there,  with  a  party  one  morning,  making 
notes  for  an  anti-superstitious  harangue,  and  grinning  in 

7 


146  SWELL  LIFE   AT  SEA  ;    OR, 

pitiable  idiocy,  and  with  perfect  ignorance,  over  the  graves 
of  the  knights.)  Some  day  I  may  tell  you  all  that  has 
passed  in  my  head  and  heart,  since  I  took  part  in  this  little 
drama,  of  which  the  catastrophe  approaches.  Beaulieu, 
my  dear  fellow,  you  shall  see  her  to-day  1" 


CHAPTER    IX. 

THEY  were  now  cantering  through  the  gates,  past  the 
fortifications,  with  their  green  turf  and  their  solid  stone, 
which  form  the  hem  of  the  garment  of  that  sea-damsel,  Ya- 
letta.  Before  them  lies  the  stony  landscape,  which  we 
described  the  other  day,  basking  in  mild  autumn  hues. 
They  turn  into  a  narrow  road,  and  make  for  an  unfrequent- 
ed village.  A  dog  barks  ;  some  children  rush  out ;  a  crone, 
reposing  under  the  shadow  of  a  chapel,  wakes  up,  and 
stares,  and  grasps  her  crutch.  But,  in  a  moment,  she 
slumbers  again,  as  quietly  as  the  dry  and  dusty  trees  which 
front  a  small  row  of  little  white  houses ;  as  quaintly,  too, 
as  yonder  wooden  saint,  perched  up  in  a  box  with  glass 
windows  at  the  corner. 

"  Why,  the  whole  village  is  asleep,"  exclaimed  Forbessy. 
Indeed,  it  looked  like  it.  But  Forbessy,  riding  close  up  to 
the  windows  of  a  house,  tapped  with  the  butt-end  of  his 
whip  at  them.  A  sleepy  and  also  woolly  head  appeared 
there,  staring  as  if  still  in  a  dream,  then  vanished,  and  out 
from  the  door  appeared  a  Maltese,  and  proceeded  to  offer 
his  services  to  hold  the  horses.  They  dismounted.  Beau- 
lieu  took  Forbessy's  arm,  resigning  himself  to  his  command, 
and  they  strolled  through  the  little  place  enjoying  the  after- 
noon air.  The  houses  forming  the  village  were  grouped 
together  so  fantastically,  and  without  order  ;  trees  shooting 
up  amongst  them  j  bits  of  garden  dividing  them,  with  ^ 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  147 

effect  so  careless  and  unsystematic,  that  you  might  fancy 
that  the  whole  had  been  scattered  by  the  hand  of  a  flying 
deity  en  route  to  Greece.  The  chapel  had  somehow  got 
planted  in  the  centre,  and  seemed  to  hold  itself  up  as  an  en- 
sign for  the  houses  to  rally  round.  There  was  a  time  when 
the  chapel  was  that  everywhere. 

"This  village,"  said  Forbessy,  taking  a  firmer  clasp  of 
his  friend's  arm,  "  enjoyed'  some  patronage  during  the  days 
of  the  Order.  The  knights  came  out  here  occasionally  as 
a  change ;  some  of  them  had  houses  here.  In  this  little 
place,  for  instance,  I  recognize  the  relics  of  a  gentleman's 
dwelling." 

So  saying,  Forbessy  opened  a  garden  gate,  and  followed 
by  his  friend,  marched  in.  The  house  stood  apart  from  the 
village,  and  had,  indeed,  an  air,  even  in  decay,  of  former 
better  fortune.  The  garden  still  boasted  trees  of  orange 
and  of  almond.  And  among  the  wild  grass,  which  sprang 
up  rank  over  the  ruins  of  a  wall,  there  were  fragments  of 
stone  of  which  the  carved  and  shapely  proportions  indicated 
that  they  had  formed  part  of  structures,  when  the  occupiers 
loved  beauty. 

"By  Annabel!"  said  Beaulieu,  rather  affectedly,  "a 
pleasant  place  enough  !  One  sometimes  fancies  one  could 
live  in  such  places,  and  be  very  very  virtuous  and  romantic  ; 
but  one  comes  back  to  civilization  and  milk  punch." 

"Yes,"  said  Forbessy,  "couldn't  one  lie  on  the  grass 
with  a  pipe  in  one's  mouth,  and  hear  the  Castle  of  Indolence 
read  by — somebody  ?  But  here  she  comes  !" 

As  he  spoke,  the  door  opened  ;  the  porch,  overgrown 
with  roses,  which  were  waving  and  falling  in  heaps,  vibrated. 
A  little  boy  came  skipping  out,  ran  up  to  Forbessy  with 
perfect  familiarity,  and  hailed  him  as  "Missa  Forbessy/' 
most  intimately. 

Forbessy  lifted  him  up,  and  played  with  him,  to  the  im- 


148  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OB, 

mense  amusement  of  Beaulieu.     "Marie  come  directly," 
said  the  youngster. 

"  Who  asked  you  about  Marie,  enfant  terrible?"  For- 
bessy  said.  Beaulieu  smiled,  and  admired  the  fatherly  air 
of  Forbessy,  who  made  himself  at  home,  and  produced  from 
his  pocket  certain  duldaria  for  the  juvenile,  quite  like  a 
veteran. 

The  door  opened  again.  This  time,  there  appeared  in 
the  garden  a  little  thin  old  man  in  black,  with  a  skull  cap 
on.  What  linen  was  visible  on  the  old  gentleman  was  not 
very  clean,  and  time  had  played  havoc  with  his  teeth.  But 
his  head  was  good  ;  his  face  was  the  peasant  face,  tempered 
by  the  priestly  position,  and  by  drilling  since  boyhood,  the 
common  priest-face  of  Malta. 

"Father  Simola,  my  friend  Mr.  Beaulieu,"  said  Forbessy. 

Father  Simola  was  very  polite.  Father  Simola  had  ac- 
quired English.  He  looked  at  Beaulieu,  and  then  he  said, 
rubbing  his  hands  together,  "  Is  your  friend  from  Lancashire 
like  yourself?" 

"No,"  said  Forbessy.  "No,  Father  Simola.  He  wants 
to  know  if  you  are  one  of  the but  never  mind,"  he  con- 
tinued rather  abruptly.  Forbessy  treated  the  Father  with 
a  great  deal  of  good-natured  courtesy,  though  the  old  gen- 
tleman made  but  a  small  figure  in  conversation  ;  was,  indeed, 
the  ordinary,  unromantic  priest- of  the  lower  orders,  and  up 
to  the  calibre  of  the  little  chapel. 

More  arrivals — two  or  three  more  younkers,  among 
whom  at  last  sailed  out  our  young  friend,  Marie  Polonai. 
Beaulieu  was  all  eyes  ;  he  had  never  seen  her  before,  and 
when  he  first  found  her  one  of  their  group,  and  standing 
tranquilly  before  Forbessy  and  the  Father,  he  scarcely  knew 
what  to  say — she  was  so  much  more  beautiful — so  very 
superior  in  all  ways  to  his  anticipations.  Forbessy,  who 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  149 

had  shaken  hands  with  her  in  a  brotherly  manner,  when  she 
first  appeared  in  the  garden,  presented  Beaulieu  to  her. 
Beaulien  was  struck  by  nothing  so  much  (not  even  by  her 
eyes,  which  were  miraculous,  and  which  I  should  despair  of 
describing)  as  by  the  utter  naturalness  of  her  manner.  This 
was  what  delighted  all  competent  observers  in  Marie  Polo- 
nai.  She  was  as  natural  as  a  rose,  if  I  may  be  permitted 
such  a  comparison  ;  that  is,  she  was  always  equally  delight- 
ful ;  equally  in  her  place,  singing,  talking,  running,  dancing  ; 
all  her  actions  flowed  from  a  central  beauty  of  which  they 
partook,  and  while  you  wondered  at  her  perfection,  and 
strove  to  account  for  it,  you  found  criticism  to  merge  at 
last  into  mere  assent,  and  were  contented  with  the  fact 
without  puzzling  yourself  with  the  "  why." 

The  youngsters  brought  seats.  They  sat  down  and  tran- 
quilly basked  in  the  afternoon,  of  which  Forbessy  seemed 
to  cherish  every  passing  moment.  The  wind  blew  a  few 
rose-leaves  from  the  mass  at  the  porch,  which  scattered 
themselves  all  over  Marie,  and  fell  about  her. 

"  Oh  !  that  wind,"  said  Forbessy.  "  I  hate  the  wind  ! 
It  carries  away  good  fellows  like  Beaulieu  and  me  from  all 
we  love — sailors  are  its  slaves.  It  does  the  evil  work  of 
autumn,  for  it  carries  the  flowers  and  leaves  away  long  be- 
fore autumn  has  altogether  ruined  them,  and  while  they  are 
first  tinged  with  a  new  beauty  by  it.  It  is  going  to  take 
Marie  away,  as  it  has  just  done  the  roses  !" 

"  Yes,  but  the  wind  that  takes  me  can,  by  and  by,  bring 
you,'7  said  Marie  in  a  low  voice. 

Forbessy  looked  up  at  her,  but  said  nothing. 

"  How  glad  your  father  will  be  to  see  you,  Marie,"  said 
Father  Simola,  simply. 

"  He  will.  He  is  to  take  me  to  Naples.  I  am  to  learn 
to  sing.  The  ladies  Wyoming  say  that  I  already  sing  like 
an  angel." 


150  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  These  ladies,"  said  Father  Simola,  alluding  with  severity 
to  their  plans  of  conversion,  "  are  not  good  ladies." 

"  They  are  very  kind.  They  wished  me  to  begin  a  new 
worship,  it  is  true.  I  told  them  worship  is  worship,  and  be- 
longs to  the  heart.  I  cannot  argue,  but,  already,  if  I  am 
good,  I  know  how  to  pray.  Every  day,  after  I  have  seen 
them,  I  have  seen  Father  Simola  ;  he  can  argue ;  and  I 
have  known  him  since  a  little  girl ;  but  the  ladies  Wyoming 
will  not  see  Father  Simola  !" 

Beaulieu  smiled.  "  You  are  a  good  girl,"  said  Father 
Simola. 

The  little  boy  came  running  up,  laughing  and  shouting. 
Something  new  was  evidently  about  to  begin  ;  and  Beau- 
lieu  looking  up,  saw  a  party  of  Maltese  approaching. 
Forbessy  and  the  others  were  ready  to  receive  them.  For- 
bessy  shook  hands  with  one  or  two,  and  Beaulieu  observed 
that  they  all  treated  him  with  great  respect,  and  seemed  to 
know  him  quite  well.  Beaulieu  felt  the  scene  new,  and  as 
he  strolled  about  the  garden,  fancied  himself  a  seigneur 
presiding  at  the  festival  of  his  peasantry. 

"  But,  my  good  fellow,"  said  Beaulieu,  recognizing  a  face 
which  he  had  seen  before,  "  surely  you  and  I  have  met 
somewhere  ?  If  I  mistake  not,  it  was  on  an  occasion  when 
you  wanted  me  to  taste  your  knife  1" 

The  Maltese  smiled  and  bowed  very  low.  "  Pardon  me, 
sar — I  think  it  was  !"  Then,  again  taking  off  his  cap  and 
bowing  very  low  indeed,  he  twisted  round  and  shot  away  to 
another  part  of  the  garden. 

Beaulieu  stood  watching  them.  Father  Simola,  who 
drew  near,  said,  "  They  all  adore  Marie  ! — she  is  the  pride 
of  their  whole  neighborhood,  she  is  so  kind  and  good — she 
is  so  modest  and  gifted ;  they  would  kill  any  one  who  they 
thought  would  insult  her."  And  so  the  old  padre  rattled 
on  about  the  gifts  and  graces  of  the  girl,  and  the  worship 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  151 

of  her  by  the  Maltese.  Some  of  them  had  formed  a  band 
of  worshippers,  and  were  pledged  to  guard  her — and  so 
forth. 

But  the  afternoon  was  wearing  away.  The  pale  rose- 
colored  fire  was  already  spreading  itself  over  the  west.  It 
was  time  to  go.  Beaulieu  was  conducted  with  many  de- 
monstrations of  politeness  to  his  horse  ;  Forbessy  lingered 
a  few  minutes,  and  then  followed.  Waving  his  whip  to 
Beaulieu,  he  motioned  him  to  follow  at  a  gallop  ;  and  for 
many  minutes  they  clattered  on  in  silence.  At  last  For- 
bessy pulled  up  and  began  to  talk  before  any  questions  were 
asked  him. 

"  A  strange  episode — eh  ?  You  observed  how  much 
alone  I  was,  and  how  much  occupied  by  unshared  thoughts, 
till  you  and  I  discovered  each  other,  as  I  may  justly  call  it  ? 
Accident  threw  me  in  the  way  of  that  charming  being.  I 
made  acquaintance  with  her  family,  chiefly  by  favor  of  that 
old  priest,  whom — but  no  matter  at  present  about  my  rela- 
tion to  him.  I  was  interested  by  her  genius — for  it  is  genius 
which  gives  that  air  of  superiority  to  her  manner,  and  which 
raises  it  above  her  birth.  She  will  be  a  great  artist ;  and 
I  hope  the  world  will  never  spoil  her.  Well,  I  almost  im- 
mediately discovered  the  designs  of  our  gentleman  from 
— shire,  and  for  weeks  I  have  amused  myself  by  counter- 
acting them — keeping  him  from  possibly  coming  in  contact 
with  her,  just  as  a  gardener  would  keep  a  slug  or  caterpillar 
from  his  flowers.  The  gentleman  from  — shire,  (by  Jove  ! 
I  could  give  you  a  capital  history  of  the  Fitz-Gubins.  Ours 
was  one  of  the  families  which  their  patriarch  Gubbins  man- 
aged to  mano3uvre  out  of shire)  saw  Marie  once  at 

night,  in  Valetta,  and  once  at  the  Wyomings,  who  patron- 
ized her  as  a  barn-door  fowl  might  patronize  a  nightingale. 
He  puts  you  in  danger  by  haunting  her  dwelling  at  all 
hours  ;  but  never  saw  her  again.  He  sent  her  letters, 


152  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

which  she  handed  over  to  old  Simola,  who  used  to  barn 
them  with  much  ceremony,  and  cross  himself  afterwards. 
And  (here  Forbessy  laughed)  he  employed  what  he  calls 
'  a  cad ?  to  convey  those  epistles,  who,  by  the  way  of  keep- 
ing up  a  lucrative  employment,  got  somebody  to  write  an- 
swers ;  and  Fitz-Gubin  lived  in  the  conviction  that  he  was 
encouraged.  He  sent  her  bracelets  and  a  locket ;  and  I 
am  sorry  to  say  that  old  Simola  sent  these  off  yesterday  to 
the  Wyomings,  for  their  friend  the  '  Lord  Fizzgubbing"  as 
he  calls  him.  This  I  did  not  know  in  time  to  prevent 
it,  which  I  would  have  done  for  their  sakes.  The  final 
step  you  already  know — viz.,  that  having  learned  the  how 
and  when  of  the  girFs  departure,  he  got  leave  to  go  for  a 
trip,  and  took  a  cabin  in  the  Victor — a  fact  of  which  she  has 
no  knowledge — intending  to  give  her  a  delightful  surprise, 
and  have  a  pleasant  cruise  as  the  irresistible  Fitz-Gubin  \" 

"  Upon  my  word,  a  devilish  pleasant  programme  1"  said 
Beaulieu. 

"A  word  of  this  notable  scheme  would  have  caused  some 
friends  of  Marie's  to  do  what  would  have  stopped  Fitz- 
Gufiin's  career,  perhaps,  finally ;  but  then  the  service  is  to 
be  considered.  No ;  we  must  stop  him  ourselves.  I  owe 
that  '  great  family ?  a  grudge,  and  shan't  be  sorry  to  punish 
him." 

Little  does  the  solid  BULDER  think  what  plots  are  being 
plotted,  what  a  secret  life  is  transacting  itself  under  the 
brilliant  surface  of  his  lighted  saloons  this  autumn  night ! 
Let  us  be  thankful  that  we  do  not  see  society  as  the  micro- 
scope shows  us  a  bright  drop  of  water,  with  ugly  objects 
preying  on  each  other  in  its  heart  1  Let  us  be  thankful  for 
its  apparent  brightness  and  purity,  and  topple  it  off  without 
applying  the  microscope ;  at  least,  without  applying  it  al- 
ways. Pass  on,  stout  Mr.  Bulder  ;  thou  art  a  good-natured, 
hospitable  old  gentleman,  happy  among  thy  guests,  not  de- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  153 

voured  by  secret  anxieties,  nor  bored  by  those  whom  thou 
entertainest.  Glance  at  Lady  Ostrich  the  beautiful ;  is 
she  not  happy  ?  Is  not  everybody  happy  here  ?  Listen  to 
the  music — the  embodiment  of  luxury  and  romance — is  it 
produced  by  a  band  who  hate  the  party  for  taking  them 
away  from  their  pipes  at  the  canteen  ?  Has  the  apparent 
happiness  a  secret  fact  lurking  under  its  production,  like 
that  fact  about  the  music  ?  It  may  be  so.  But  carpe  diem. 
Wine  will  give  you  a  headache ;  but,  if  you  do  not  take 
wine,  you  may  yet  have  a  headache  to-morrow. 

Beaulieu  and  Forbessy  were  both  dancing.  Beaulieu 
always  danced ;  it  pleased  the  people  of  the  house,  and, 
after  all,  did  not  bore  him  much.  But  regularly  as  each 
quadrille  was  over,  he  and  Forbessy  glided  together.  Ne- 
ver, for  any  length  of  time,  did  they  lose  sight  of  Fitz-Gubin. 
The  "Wyomings  were  there  ;  but  Fitz-Gubin  did  not  dance, 
and  avoided  them.  His  eyes  once  met  Forbessy's,  but  no 
sign  of  recognition  passed ;  but  Forbessy  and  Beaulieu  re- 
marked how  easily  he  carried  himself — how  well  he  hid 
under  his  calm  exterior  the  secret  excitement  which  must 
have  been  at  his  heart. 

Forbessy  grew  restless.  Beaulieu  again  and  again  sooth- 
ed him.  So  long  as  Fitz-Gubin  remained  in  the  room,  (as 
he  urged,)  all  was  well.  Presently,  Beaulieu  approached 
Forbessy,  and  whispered  to  him,  "  Come." 

When  they  stood  outside  on  the  landing  place,  Beaulieu 

said,  "A  man  of  the gives  a  supper  at  the  hotel . 

Fitz-Gubin  is  to  be  there.  I  have  got  myself  and  you 
asked,  at  the  last  moment.  Fitz-Gubin  is  evidently  to  start 
from  there.  I  met  Siddlington,  just  now,  and  drew  from 
him  carelessly,  that  he  had  formally  begun  his  leave,  and 
left  the  Sovereign.  So  let  us  off  to  the  hotel,  and  manage 
the  affair  as  quietly  as  we  can." 

They  were  the  last  arrivals.  The  party  consisted  of  some 
7* 


154  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

fifteen  men.  As  they  entered  the  room,  Fitz-Gubin  was 
talking  away ;  and,  though  we  know  that  he  had  himself 
under  tolerable  control,  he  did  not  look  pleased  when  he 
saw  our  friends  enter.  They  were  the  only  men  of  the 
Sovereign  present,  and  just  the  two  men  of  the  Sovereign 
whom  he  least  knew,  or  least  cared  to  meet. 

"  Mr.  Beaulieu,  and  Mr.  Forbessy,"  said  the  good-natured 
host,  "  messmates  of  Fitz-Gubin's,  I  think  ?  This  way  I 
Will  you  begin  with  a  quail  ?  What  wine,  Beaulieu  ? 
Fitz-Gubin,  you  don't  drink  1" 

They  sat  down  ;  some  gentlemen  had  begun  to  drink  evi- 
dently pretty  early.  Wine  of  the  best  sorts  was  plentiful 
enough :  the  supper  comprised  all  that  Malta  can  afford ; 
and  Malta  is  not  poor  in  that  department.  Bones  from  the 
funeral  pyres  of  gallant  turkeys  (ossa  perusta,  a  Latin  poet 
would  call  them)  came  up  in  quick  relays ;  the  pleasant 
quail  on  his  bed  of  toast ;  the  piquant  becafico,  who  nou- 
rishes his  fine  soul  on  the  romantic  fig,  awaited  the  appetite 
and  excited  to  wine  ;  while  for  the  mere  sentimental  dawdler, 
fruit  and  liqueurs  offered  their  voluptuous  charms.  When 
you  had  exhausted  every  sense  of  the  palate,  you  could  still 
seek  coolness  and  forgetfulness  in  some  iced  punch — punch 
as  attractive  and  exciting  as  the  eyes  of  houris. 

There  was  a  great  deal  of  drinking.  Two  or  three  fel- 
lows early  babbled,  and  became  merely  bores.  Forbessy 
drank,  too ;  but  the  pre-occupation  of  his  mind  kept  him 
from  being  overcome ;  wine  only  strung  up  and  sharpened 
his  faculties,  and  intensified  his  sense  of  past,  present,  and 
future.  The  conversation  (when  the  two  or  three  babblers 
fell  asleep)  became  fixed  among  a  few,  and  the  rest  list- 
ened. 

"  But  come,  Fitz-Gubin — come ;  about  this  last  adven- 
ture, you  know  !  You  were  shaying  ?"  began  a  young 
gentleman,  whose  hair  was  fast  getting  into  his  eyes. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  155 

"  Fitz-Gubin,  you  don't  drink  ?"  said  the  host. 

"  Your  last,  what  d'ye  call  it,  ye  know?"  continued  the 
speaker. 

"  Oh,  nothing  very  extraordinary  I"  said  Fitz-Gubin,  with 
an  intolerably  conceited  manner.  "  I'm  an  old  stager. 
When  I  was  in  South  America — ah,  never  mind  I  Poor 
little  Madeline  !" 

"Wouldn't  she  have  you,  then  ?"  called  out  Beaulieu. 

Fitz-Gubin  did  not  take  any  notice  of  him.  Beaulieu, 
who  was  drinking  pretty  hard,  poured  some  moselle  into  his 
tumbler,  and  drank  it  off. 

"  About  Madeline  ?"  called  out  Beaulieu,  very  loudly. 

"  No — no  ;  about  the  new  one.  I  say,  Fitz-Gubin,  let 
us  hear  about  her.  Are  her  eyes  blue  ?"  asked  the  first 
speaker,  with  a  determined  and  most  serious  air. 

"  No  ;  charming  dark  eyes  ;  nice  as  the  Spanish  girls." 

"  Sit  down,  Forbessy,  for  God's  sake  !  and  wait  a  little  V9 
whispered  Beaulieu,  for  Forbessy  was  turning  pale  and  very 
serious. 

"  Oh,  hang  dark  eyes  ;  give  me  blue  eyes  !"  said  the 
aforesaid  young  gentleman,  looking  round  with  an  imbecile 
expression. 

"  Fitz-Gubin,  you  don't  drink  ?"  said  the  host,  once 
more. 

"  I  mustn't  drink  :  I'm  going  to  sail  at  daylight." 

"  Sail  at  daylight?"  inquired  somebody. 

"  Gentlemen,"  cried  Beaulieu,  "  fill  your  glasses." 

The  roar  with  which  he  said  this,  accompanied  by  a 
thump  which  made  all  the  glasses  ring,  startled  the  whole 
table.  Wine,  punch,  all  conceivable  liquors  were  poured 
out — sherry  by  some,  into  champagne — and  brandy  by  some, 
into  sherry — as  the  mad  genius  of  the  hour  dictated.  Beau- 
lieu  stood  up,  with  a  tumbler  full  to  the  brim  of  wine,  bal- 
ancing himself  with  a  slight  lurch.  "  Gentlemen,  I  propose 


156  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

a  toast.  I  propose  one  of  the  most  beautiful  and  innocent 
creatures  God  ever  made  1"  Here  there  was  an  immense 
noise,  with  wild  outcries  and  the  crashing  of  glass.  "  The 
man  who  does  not  drink  it,  shall  rue  the  hour.  Gentlemen, 
Marie  Polonai !  Forbessy,  return  thanks  1" 

"Marie  Polonai!"  screamed  a  dozen  voices,  and  again 
there  was  a  noise  which  shook  the  room.  ."Who  is  she?" 
called  out  several  men.  "  Forbessy  !"  roared  others. 

Fitz-Gubin  had  started  to  his  feet,  like  a  man  shot  in  the 
heart,  and  stood  up  speechless  and  pale  with  surprise. 
Forbessy  had  done  the  same,  and,  as  the  noise  died  away, 
the  two  stood  there  facing  each  other ;  men,  sober  enough 
to  judge,  saw  that  in  the  look  of  the  two  faces,  as  they  met, 
there  was  deadly  mischief. 

"Do  you  drink  that  toast,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin?"  Forbessy 
asked. 

"I  drink  it !  You  surprise  me,  sir,  by  asking  me  about 
any  proceeding  of  mine.  Capt.  Bechamel — thank  you  for 
your  hospitality  :  it  is  late  and  I  must  bid  you  good  night." 

"  Lord  Fitz-Gubin,  you  leave  not  this  room  to  sail  in  the 
Victor :  mark  me,  to  sail  in  the  Victor,  I  say  !  If  you  are 

such  a  craven  as " 

®  This  was  the  one  thing  needed  to  make  the  scene  com- 
plete. Like  a  handful  of  powder  falling  on  a  fire,  the  room 
went  into  a  blaze.  Noises  of  every  kind  caused  a  scene  of 
extreme  confusion.  Fitz-Gubin  lost  himself  in  spite  of  his 
caution  ;  there  were  fatal  words,  and  a  scuffle. 

"Now,"  said  Captain  Bechamel,  "nothing  remains  but 
to  separate  for  the  evening,  and  postpone  all  necessary 
ulterior  proceedings  till  the  proper  time.  After  what  has 
passed,  of  course,  Lord  Fitz-Gubin  will  see  the  propriety 
of  remaining  in  Malta,  till  the  matter  has  come  to  its  pro- 
per termination." 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  151 

The  next  day  after  this  scene,  the  mail  from  England 
arrived,  with  (among  other  novelties)  Fitz-Gubin's  promo- 
tion to  the  rank  of  lieutenant.  This  brought  a  new  ele- 
ment into  the  matter.  Explanations — memoranda — notes — 
recapitulations,  and  botherations  of  all  kinds  passed  between 
the  parties  in  the  quarrel  and  their  representatir es.  Finally, 
everybody  was  "satisfied."  But  to  this  hour  it  is  the  opin- 
ion of  Fitz-Gubin  that  Malta  is  a  d — d  hole  ! 


CRUISE  OF  THE  IDA. 


FROM  COLBURN'S  UNITED  SERVICE  MAGAZINE  FOR  APRIL. 


CHAPTER    I. 
HOME. 

I  LOOK  upon  money,"  said  my  father,  filling  out  for  him- 
self a  glass  of  port  wine,  and  pushing  the  decanter  to- 
wards me,  "  to  be  the  root  of  all  evil." 

"  The  love  of  it,  you  mean  ?"  said  my  mother,  with  that 
meek,  inquiring  smile  with  which  she  was  wont  to  question 
the  paradoxes  put  forth  by  her  better  half. 

"  The  want  of  it,  by  Jove,  Sir,  'the  res  angusta  domij  is 
unquestionably  far  more  prolific  of  real  misfortune,"  inter- 
rupted I,  with  all  the  pertness  of  a  youngster. 

"Make  money  honestly,  if  you  can,  my  boy,"  replied  my 
father.  "  If  you  can't,  I  would  not  recommend  the  '  quocun- 
que  modo.'  It  will  be  quite  the  same  to  you,  a  hundred 
years  from  this  day,  whether  you  were  clothed  in  purple 
and  fine  linen,  and  drove  down  in  your  carriage  to  '  the 
House,'  listened  to  a  few  drowsy  speeches,  and  returned  to 
a  sumptuous  banquet  in  Belgravia  ;  or  whether  you  swept 
a  crossing  for  sixpence  a  day,  and  dined  off  broken  victuals, 
the  tenant  in  common  of  a  lodging  in  St.  Giles7.  You  won't 
fare  a  bit  the  worse  in  the  next  world  because  you  are  poor 
in  this." 

"  Ah  1"  said  my  mother,  "  that  is  all  very  well,  once  we 
get  there;  but  does  it  not  make  some  difference  while  we  are 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  159 

here  ?  You  would  not  be  sitting  in  that  comfortable  arm- 
chair, beside  that  cheerful  fire,  and  beside  me,  if  you  had 
nothing  but  a  crossing  to  sweep." 

"  I  think,  Sir,  it  is  Lord  Bacon  who  says  :  'There  can  be 
no  stronger  proof  of  the  slender  value  which  Providence 
sets  upon  money,  than  the  sort  of  people  he  gives  it  to  •/ 
but  at  the  same  time,  I  am  rather  inclined  to  agree  with 
my  mother,  that  a  deficiency  in  the  commodity  is  a  much 
worse  thing  than  too  much  of  it." 

"Pish  !"  replied  my  father,  cracking  a  filbert,  and  adjust- 
ing his  napkin  across,  his  knees,  "the  subject  is  one  not 
unworthy  of  grave  discussion  ;  much  can  be  said  on  both 
sides.  The  influence  money  has  upon  the  destinies  of  man- 
kind— whether  in  the  individual  or  the  abstract — is  all- 
important.  A  scrutiny  into  the  pecuniary  dealings  of  any 
one  person,  from  the  cradle  to  the  grave,  would  not  only 
be  a  complete  history  of  his  life,  but  when  we  come  to  con- 
sider the  vices  and  the  virtues  with  which  it  is  connected — 
dishonesty,  extravagance,  intemperance,  profligacy,  frugal- 
ity, and  self-denial, — the  corruption  that  follows  upon  the 
love  of  it,  the  industry  which  is  sweetened  by  its  acquisi- 
tion, the  vicissitudes  that  follow  in  its  train — there  can  be 
no  doubt  that  such  an  investigation  would  hold  a  perfect 
mirror  up  to  nature,  and  exhibit  the  man  as  he  really  is 
behind  the  scenes,  not  as  he  moves  and  plays  his  part  before 
the  public,  on  the  great  stage  of  human  life." 

My  mother  looked  upon  her  lord  with  an  admiring  eye, 
as  he  refreshed  his  eloquence  with  another  glass  of  the 
generous  liquid,  gave  a  preparatory  "hem,"  and  continued — 

"'Blessed  is  the  rich  that  is  found  without  blemish,  and 
hath  not  gone  after  gold/  There  are  few  who  come  within 
the  range  of  this  benediction  ;  a  thousand  temptations — a 
thousand  snares — beset  his  path  who  is  born  to  opulence  ; 
wealth  will  alter  his  mind — the  desire  of  gain  grows  by 


160  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

what  it  feeds  on — it  is  seldom  associated  with  nobler 
objects ;  and  I  look  upon  the  mercantile  spirit  of  the  age, 
I  mean  the  mere  investment  of  money,  for  the  sake  of  repro- 
duction, to  be  one  of  the  strongest  and  most  fatal  signs  of 
the  utter  degeneracy  of  the  times.  Therefore,  my  son,  I 
think  it  is  just  as  well  for  you,  whether  as  regards  your 
temporal  or  your  eternal  welfare,  that  you  will  not  inherit 
anything  from  me  ;  the  best  patrimony  I  can  leave  you,  is 
a  true  heart,  a  good  education,  and  a  strong  will.  Let  these 
temper  the  edge  of  that  sword  with  which  you  will  carve 
your  way  through  the  battle  of  life.  You  will  find  the 
road  open  to  you,  as  easily  as  the  oyster  of  ancient  Pistol, 
or  this  filbert  which  I  split  with  my  knife." 

Having  thus  concluded  his  discourse,  my  father  carefully 
raked  the  under-bar  of  the  fire,  upon  which  he  threw  a  fresh 
faggot  of  log-firs,  and  having  crossed  his  legs  and  folded  up 
the  napkin  that  lay  on  his  knee,  he  leaned  back  in  his  easy 
chair,  and  went  off  into  a  gentle  slumber. 

Let  us  take  a  glance  at  him,  reader,  as  he  is  enjoying  his 
post-prandial  nap.  There  are  no  candles  upon  the  square, 
small,  old-fashioned  table,  with  its  quaintly  carved  legs, 
which  stands  upon  the  hearth-rug.  Nor  is  there  any  other 
light  in  the  room,  save  that  emitted  from  the  ample  fire, 
whose  flashing  rays,  dancing  up  the  chimney,  threw  out  in 
strong  relief  the  outlines  of  the  form  reposing  in  the  old 
arm-chair.  It  was  that  of  a  large,  powerfully-built,  and 
handsome  man,  in  the  decline  of  life ;  a  few  thin  silver 
hairs  were  all  that  remained  around  the  temples,  and  the 
features,  even  in  repose,  seemed  strongly  marked  by  the 
traces  of  care  as  well  as  of  years — well  might  they — but 
with  the  vicissitudes  of  his  life,  these  pages  have  little 
to  do. 

I  have  set  down  the  conversation  just  recorded,  in  order 
to  show  my  father's  nature  ;  it  will  be  sufficient  to  demon- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  161 

strate  that  slender  regard  he  attached  to  those  objects  for 
which  the  generality  of  men  so  eagerly  strive.  Of  a  care- 
less, frank,  and  confiding  nature,  his  easiness  of  temper  had 
been  his  besetting  sin.  Having  allowed  himself  to  become 
involved  as  surety  for  some  distant  relations,  he  was  left  to 
pay  the  penalty  of  his  imprudence ;  and,  although  of  our 
family  property  a  sufficient  margin  still  remained  to  afford 
even  the  comforts  of  life,  his  income  was  reduced  to  little 
more  than  half  of  what  it  originally  had  been.  My  eldest 
brother  had  been  brought  up  to  the  bar,  where  he  was 
slowly  but  surely  wending  his  way  to  independence. 

I  had  been  educated  at  home,  under  the  eye  of  my  father, 
who,  although  a  simple-minded  man  in  some  respects,  was  a 
ripe  and  elegant  scholar.  Being  of  a  contemplative  nature, 
I  had  long  brooded  over  the  difficulties  in  which  my  family 
were  involved,  and  I  had  meditated  endeavoring  to  push 
my  fortunes  in  some  mysterious  way,  as  the  tales  and  histo- 
ries with  which  I  was  familiar  had  taught  me  people  did  in 
the  olden  time.  My  passion  for  reading  was.,  intense,  and 
plays,  voyages,  and  travels,  were  my  principal  studies  ;  and 
I  had  almost  by  heart,  Captain  Bligh's  narrative  of  his  voy- 
age to  the  South  Sea  Islands,  and  his  account  of  the  mutiny 
of  the  crew.  Our  library  was  a  tolerably  extensive  one, 
and  afforded  ample  materials  for  the  indulgence  of  my  favor- 
ite taste.  But  in  time  I  had  exhausted  these — and,  so  insa- 
tiable was  my  appetite,  that  I  seized  upon  every  occasion 
for  borrowing  and  collecting  other  books,  and  every  leisure 
moment  for  reading  them.  Those  in  which  our  library  was 
deficient  I  generally  procured  at  Silverthorne,  where  one  of 
my  mother's  sisters  resided,  whose  husband,  Sir  William 
Herbert,  a  distinguished  officer,  had  amassed  a  considerable 
fortune  in  the  East  Indies.  They  had  only  one  child  ;  my 
cousin,  Lucy,  had  been  my  constant  associate  almost  as 
long  as  I  can  remember.  She  was  a  beautiful  creature, 


162  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

with  large  blue  eyes,  and  the  sweetest  smile  it  is  possible  to 
conceive.  If  childhood  could  have  found  a  voice  to  reveal 
its  dawning  passions,  the  feelings  I  from  the  first  entertained 
for  my  cousin,  would  have  been  called  love  ;  but,  as  it  was, 
our  intimacy  was  only  regarded  by  most  of  the  members  of 
our  respective  families  as  the  natural  result  of  our  near  re- 
lationship. Thus  my  early  youth  glided  on,  happy  and 
undisturbed,  save  by  the  family  cares  at  which  I  have 
already  hinted.  Of  my  father,  save  in  the  mornings  and 
evenings,  I  saw  but  little ;  he  passed  his  whole  days  sur- 
rounded by  his  books.  But  Lucy  and  I  were  inseparable  ; 
we  had  lived  through  and  were  now  past  that  epoch  of 
our  lives  when  it  had  been  necessary  to  watch  over  us  with 
unremitting  attention.  Our  great  delight  was  to  wander 
together,  at  earliest  dawn,  through  the  woods  and  gardens 
surrounding  the  old  hall  We  have  often,  hand-in-hand, 
beheld  the  rising  of  the  sun — we  have  watched  rejoicing 
nature  reviving  under  its  influence.  Those  early  hours 
were  so  many  additional  ones  that  we  could  add  to  our 
accustomed  periods  of  recreation ;  and  although  we  had 
now  arrived  at  an  age  when  such  a  constant  intimacy  might 
have  been  considered  objectionable  to  our  respective  rela- 
tives, no  exception  was  ever  taken,  nor  did  I  fully  compre- 
hend then  the  smiles  of  peculiar  meaning  with  which  my 
mother  would  regard  us,  when  she  saw  us  returning  hand- 
in-hand  from  some  of  our  pleasant  woodland  rambles.  Of 
her  I  must  say  a  few  words. 

At  fifty  years  of  age,  my  mother  still  retained  many 
traces  of  that  beauty  by  which  she  was  pre-eminently  dis- 
tinguished. She  was  slight  and  delicate,  with  large  dark 
eyes  and  a  fair  brow,  over  which  her  hair  parted,  which 
had  prematurely  become  gray.  The  quiet  self-possession 
and  easy  grace  of  her  manner,  as  she  sat  intrenched  beside 
her  little  work-table,  occupied  with  some  of  those  little 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  163 

nameless  employments  that  tend  to  the  dissipation  of  female 
leisure,  would  have,  at  a  glance,  convinced  the  most  care- 
less spectator  that  she  was  of  gentle  breeding.  Descended 
from  a  family,  the  various  members  of  which  had,  in  their 
day,  done  the  state  good  service,  she  had  brought  my  father 
little  save  the  charm  of  her  beauty  and  the  affectionate  soli- 
citude which  had  lightened  many  a  sorrow  and  relieved  the 
darkest  and  most  cloudy  days.  She  was,  indeed,  the  gen- 
tlest of  beings.  My  mother's  relatives  had  occupied  distin- 
guished posts,  some  of  them  were  still  high  in  office,  and 
such  interest  as  they  possessed  had  been  from  time  to  time 
enlisted  in  my  favor.  But  whether  the  army,  the  navy,  or 
the  foreign  office,  was  to  be  my  destination,  remained  a 
mystery,  which  had  yet  to  be  decided.  This  brief  retro- 
spect will  be  sufficient  to  acquaint  my  readers  with  a  suffi- 
cient portion  of  my  previous  history  to  enable  them  to  un- 
derstand the  posture  of  affairs,  as  they  stood  when  I  intro- 
duced myself  to  their  notice. 

Redburn  Hall,  where  we  .resided,  was  an  old-fashioned 
house  with  many  gables.  It  stood  in  the  centre  of  an  am- 
phitheatre of  hills,  open  to  the  south,  where  it  commanded 
an  extensive  view  of  rich  woodland  scenery.  The  lawn, 
which  lay  to  one  side,  terminated  in  terraced  flower  gar- 
dens, which  had  once  been  extensive  and  trimly  kept,  but 
were  now  reduced  to  half  their  original  dimensions  by  the 
encroachment  of  the  woods,  which  seem  to  have  been 
allowed  to  grow  in  upon  them.  The  lawn  was  almost 
swept  by  the  hanging  branches  of  the  oak  and  laburnum. 
And  among  the  flowers  of  the  parterre,  the  wild  rose  and 
anemone  mingled,  with  a  profusion  which  afforded  abundant 
evidence  that  the  care  of  the  gardener  was  not  now  restrict- 
ed to  the  legitimate  objects  of  his  jurisdiction. 

From  the  further  extremity  of  this  piece  of  pleasure 
ground,  walks  branched  away  through  the  woods,  some 


164  SWELL   Li  FEAT   SEA;    OR, 

leading  to  the  village  which  was  distant  about  a  mile, 
others  to  the  farm,  and  others,  more  dark  and  shady, 
through  glades  overgrown  with  tangled  brushwood,  which, 
in  summer,  were  fragrant  with  the  clematis  and  woodbine — 
far  away  into  the  hills  of  the  upper  park  which  lay  in  the 
distance. 

Times  had  changed,  and  with  them  the  hall,  but  it  was  a 
comfortable  old-fashioned  English  residence,  still  keeping  up 
to  the  rest,  of  a  rather  slender  ability,  its  former  reputation 
for  hospitality.  It  had  for  several  hundred  years  been  the 
hereditary  residence  of  our  family,  of  which  my  father  was 
now  the  representative.  I  was  called  Charles,  after  a  great 
uncle,  by  my  mother's  side.  Of  my  childish  life,  the  little 
I  remember,  it  is  not  necessary  to  recapitulate  here,  more 
than  I  have  already  done.  I  had  been  carefully  educated 
under  the  eye  parental,  and  the  course  of  reading  which  I 
have  already  described,  had  stored  my  mind  with  a  species 
of  knowledge  very  different  from  the  ordinary  run  of  infor- 
mation possessed  by  boys  of  my  own  age.  Of  my  brother, 
George,  I  know  but  little ;  being  many  years  older  than 
myself,  he  was  at  school  when  I  was  still  in  the  nursery, 
and  during  the  vacations  he  occasionally  passed  at  the  hall, 
I  was  frequently  absent  on  visits  at  my  uncle's  residence. 

It  was  a  crisp,  bracing  morning,  in  early  autumn,  and  we 
were  all  seated  in  the  library,  awaiting  the  advent  of  my 
father,  ere  we  sat  down  to  breakfast — for  it  was  a  rule  in 
our  household,  that  the  morning  meal  should  invariably  be 
enjoyed  together.  The  urn  was  hissing  upon  the  table,  my 
mother  sat  behind  the  tea-cups,  looking  towards  the  door, 
and  I  was  occupied  in  airing  at  the  fire  the  county  paper, 
when  my  father  made  his  appearance  with  an  open  letter  in 
his  hand. 

"News,  my  dear,"  he  said,  as  he  took  his  accustomed 
seat  near  the  fire. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.*         165 

"  From  George  ?"  inquired  my  mother. 

"  No,"  said  my  father,  "  you  are  all  astray." 

"  From  Silverthorne,  then  ?" 

"  You  must  guess  again/7  my  father  said,  with  rather  a 
portentous  expression  of  countenance. 

"  Good  heavens  !  then  I  hope  there  is  nothing  wrong  ;" 
for  the  momentary  shadow,  as  it  flitted  past,  had  not  escaped 
my  mother's  anxious  eye. 

"  There  is  nothing  wrong ;  give  me  my  tea,  and  you  shall 
hear  all  about  it." 

His  cup  of  bohea  having  been  handed  to  him,  my  father 
pushed  the  letter  across  the  table.  No  sooner  had  the  tea- 
maker  perused  the  document  than  her  countenance  fell. 
That  letter  contained  my  future  fate.  It  conveyed  an  inti- 
mation that  I  was  appointed  to  a  frigate,  then  fitting  out 
at  Portsmouth  for  foreign  service.. 

"  It  cannot  be  possible,"  my  mother  said,  taking  off  her 
spectacles,  which  had  somehow,  all  of  a  sudden,  grown  very 
dim. 

"  Possible  !  It  is  true.  Charley,  you  are  now  Her  Ma- 
jesty's property.  Remember  my  precepts,  boy  ;  and  when 
I  am  occupying  an  humble  tenement,  you  may  perhaps  sleep 
in  Westminster  Abbey." 

"I'd  rather  have  him  at  home,  in  the  old  blue  room. 
Why,  he's  a  child,  quite  a  child,"  my  mother  said,  now 
bursting  fairly  into  tears. 

"  Pish  !"  said  my  father  ;  "  nonsense,  the  boy  will  do  his 
duty  ;  won't  you,  Charley  ?" 

"  I  will  try,  sir,"  I  said,  with  a  gulp  intended  to  keep 
down  a  lump  which  seemed  rising  in  my  throat — it  was  the 
buttered  toast — I  didn't  feel  sorry  then — the  deuce  a  bit. 

"  There  is  no  time  to  be  lost ;  the  vessel  sails  within  a 
fortnight,  and  you  must  be  rigged  out  from  top  to  toe,"  my 
father  said,  rubbing  his  hands  ;  for  any  little  excitement 


166        *       SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

always  sent  the  old  gentleman  into  a  perfect  fever  of  spirits, 
and  so  long  as  there  was  anything  to  be  bought,  or  any  ex- 
pense to  be  incurred,  he  was  perfectly  happy  ;  but  when  the 
time  arrived  for  payment,  his  spirits  were  by  no  means  so 
good. 

"  God's  will  be  done.  But  the  blow  is  a  sudden  one," 
my  mother  said,  drying  her  tears,  and  impressing  a  kiss  upon 
my  curly  head,  which  made  that  accursed  toast  rise  in  my 
throat  once  more. 

The  notice  was  indeed  somewhat  of  the  shortest,  and  it  is 
quite  possible  I  should  have  given  way  a  little,  had  I  not, 
a  few  days  previously,  been  engaged  in  an  animated  discus- 
sion with  my  cousin,  during  which  she  expressed  her  admi- 
ration of  naval  heroism,  in  a  manner  that  inspired  me  with 
the  strongest  determination  to  be  a  Nelson,  at  the  very 
least ;  but  now  that  the  die  was  irrevocably  cast,  in  which 
the  fate  of  my  future  life  was  to  be  moulded — now  that  I 
was  about  to  go  away  from  the  old  familiar  scenes  among 
which  my  youth  had  been  past — I  felt  my  ambition  to  be- 
come a  hero  begin,  like  the  courage  of  Bob  Acres,  to  ooze 
gradually  out  of  my  fingers'  ends. 

No  period  of  time  in  my  life,  perhaps,  ever  passed  so 
rapidly  as  that  which  intervened  between  the  arrival  of  the 
portentous  letter  and  my  departure  from  home.  We  were 
busily  engaged,  morning,  noon,  and  night,  in  the  necessary 
preparations.  The  whole  house  was  turned  topsy-turvy,  and 
we  had  scarcely  even  time  for  our  meals.  There  was  a 
country  town  in  the  neighborhood  which  supplied  some  of 
the  articles  which  were  requisite  ;  but  the  greater  propor- 
tion had,  of  course,  to  be  fetched  from  London  ;  and,  what 
with  the  arrival  of  packing-cases  and  the  opening  of  them, 
the  inspection  of  portmanteaus,  the  making  of  shirts,  the 
superintendence  of  stockings  and  other  kinds  of  fleecy  ho- 
siery, all  parties  concerned  found  active  occupation,  and 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  '         167 

managed  almost  to  forget  in  the  evening,  devoted  to  their 
respective  tasks,  the  approaching  event  that  had  caused  this 
commotion.  .Lucy,  too,  had  come  over  from  Silverthorne, 
and  flitted  to  and  fro  like  a  fairy.  She  made  me  a  huge 
pincushion,  with  pink  rosettes  at  the  corners,  which  I  have 
got  to  this  day,  but  which  was  rather  an  unnecessary  ap- 
pendage at  that  time.  She  laughed  and  cried  by  turns,  and 
made  herself,  in  a  small  way,  as  busy  as  the  rest,  until  the 
setting  of  the  last  sun  which  shone  upon  my  boyish  career  at 
the  old  hall. 

Until  the  final  moment  for  departure  was  so  nearly  at 
hand  I  could  scarcely  realize  to  myself  the  idea  that  I  was 
about  to  leave  all  those  things  to  which  I  was  attached  by 
so  many  ties  of  affection.  As  we  were  returning  from  our 
last  stroll  through  one  of  those  well-known  glades,  Lucy 
and  I  wept  along  in  silence.  There,  underneath  an  old  oak 
tree,  my  cousin  threw  her  arms  around  my  neck,  and  pro- 
mised me,  for  the  first  time,  her  faithful,  fond,  and  unal- 
terable love.  She  had  never  before,  during  the  long  term 
of  our  happy  intercourse,  thus  spoken  to  me,  and  yet,  even 
then,  an  unknown  feeling  of  doubt  and  desponding — a 
strange,  unaccountable  foreboding — struck  a  sudden  chill 
upon  me,  as  I  clasped  her  to  my  heart.  "  Ah !  Lucy,"  I 
said,  "  I  shall  soon  be  far  away  ;  when  I  am  gone,  and  you 
are  surrounded  by  others,  you  will  soon  cease  to  think  of 
me."  "Never  !"  she  said.  "I  have  never  known,  I  have 
never  loved  any  but  you  ;  it  is  only  now  that  we  are  about 
to  part,  I  have  discovered  how  exceedingly  dear  you  are. 
When  you  come  back,  I  shall  be  a  woman  ;  but  my  heart 
can  know  no  change  to  you."  I  kissed  her  in  silence,  and 
her  head  rested  on  my  heart  as  she  murmured,  "  You  can 
have  no  fortune,  but  mine  will  be  more  than  enough  for  us. 
When  you  come — if  you  love  me — then  you  have  but  to 
claim  me,  and  I  will  be  yours  for  ever." 


168  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

With  the  thrill  of  unutterable  happiness  which  I  felt  at 
these  words,  there  mingled  once  more  the  same  strange 
foreboding. 

"  Will  you  write  to  me  sometimes,  Lucy  ?  Will  you  only 
remember  that  it  will  make  me  so  happy?" 

"  I  will ;  take  this  little  ring,  wear  it  always  for  my  sake, 
and  when  you  look  at  it,  you  will  always  remember  me." 

With  all  the  ardor  of  boyish  passion  I  pressed  her  to  my 
heart,  and  we  returned  for  the  last  time  to  the  hall.  That 
was  our  farewell  meeting. 


CHAPTER     II. 
PORTSMOUTH. 

THE  George  Hotel  was  full  of  life  and  bustle  as  the  post- 
chaise,  containing  my  father  and  me,  drove  up  to  the  door. 
The  activity  which  pervaded  that  well-known  establishment, 
the  sunshine  and  the  happy  looks  .of  men,  contrasted 
strangely  with  the  oppressive  feeling  which  had,  at  times, 
weighed  heavily  upon  my  spirits  during  the  journey.  I 
have  purposely  passed  over  all  the  farewell  scenes,  not  that 
I  am  unable  to  describe  them,  for  they  come  back  upon  my 
memory  now  as  clearly  and  as  full  of  distinctness  as  any 
incidents  in  my  whole  career,  but  because  I  do  not  wish  to 
trouble  my  readers  with  what  can  have  but  little  bearing 
upon  the  course  of  my  history.  Dinner  was  ordered,  of 
which,  when  it  appeared,  I  partook  with  a  hearty  appetite, 
notwithstanding  my  sorrows.  In  this  I  followed  the  exam- 
ple of  my  father,  although  he  affected  to  belong  to  that 
school  of  philosophy  which  is  above  being  disturbed  by 
trifles.  I  had  observation  enough  to  perceive  he  was  not 
unmoved  by  our  approaching  separation.  How  well  I 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  169 

remember  that  dinner.  Whether  it  was  because  I  had 
never  dined  in  a  hotel  before  or  not,  I  am  unable  to  say, 
but  there  was  not  a  single  dish  appeared  which  at  this 
moment  I  could  not  enumerate.  I  imagined  everything, 
too,  had  a  sort  of  maritime  look  about  it.  The  waiter  sug- 
gested to  me  the  idea  of  a  retired  seaman,  which  for  aught 
I  can  tell  he  may  have  been  ;  and  the  whole  establishment, 
excellent  as  it  was  of  its  kind,  smacked  somewhat  of  that 
pursuit  in  which  I  was  so  soon  to  engage,  I  thought.  We 
dined  in  the  coffee-room,  of  which,  at  first,  we  were  the  only 
occupants ;  but  the  cloth  had  not  long  been  removed,  and 
we  were  sitting  with  a  decanter  of  port — the  best  that  the 
George  could  produce — on  a  table  before  us,  when  four 
gentlemen  entered  and  took  their  seats  at  a  table  which 
had  apparently  been  prepared  for  their  reception. 

"Did  you  put  the  champagne  in  ice,  as  I  bid  you, 
Joseph?"  said  the  youngest  of  the  party,  who  might  be 
some  two  years  older  than  myself. 

"Yes,  sir,"  with  deferential  politeness,  said  the  waiter, 
who  seemed  old  enough,  at  the  very  least,  to  be  the  father 
of  the  querist. 

"Dinner,  then,  as  soon  as  possible." 

While  my  father  was  finishing  his  bottle  of  port,  I  occu- 
pied myself  by  scrutinizing  the  strangers.  However  erro- 
neous may  have  been  the  opinion  I  had  entertained  about 
the  waiter,  as  to  the  new  comers  there  could  be  no  mistake 
of  any  kind.  They  were  certainly  of  the  naval  profession, 
and,  for  aught  I  could  tell,  they  might  be  men  of  consider- 
able eminence,  although  the  manner  in  which  they  spoke  of 
the  dinner  tended  by  no  means  to  impress  me  with  an  ele- 
vated idea  of  the  estimation  in  which  they  held  it. 

"Did  you  dine  with  the  Port  Admiral  on  Thursday, 
Staunton?"  said  the  youth  who  had  evinced  his  anxiety 
§bout  the  champagne. 

8 


170  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  No  ;  his  feeds  are  bad — everything  cold  but  the  wine, 
and  that's  as  hot  as  the  devil,"  was  Mr.  Staunton's  re- 
joinder. 

"  Can't  be  worse  than  we  are  on  board,"  said  the  first 
speaker,  as  he  tossed  off  a  bumper  of  wine. 

"  What  can  a  youngster  like  you  know  about  the  matter  ? 
You  can't  tell  a  good  feed  from  a  bad  one,  Ellis." 

"  Can't  I,  though  ?  I  like  this  better  than  cold  pork,  and 
I  prefer  champagne  to  three-finger  grog,"  replied  Mr.  Ellis, 
in  the  tone  of  a  deeply  injured  man. 

"  The  service  is  going  to  the  devil ;  give  me  another  slice 
of  that  mackerel,"  said  one  of  the  party,  who  had  not  before 
spoken.  He  was  a  mild-looking  youth,  with  curly  hair  and 
light-blue  eyes. 

"  That  it  is,"  replied  Mr.  Staunton. 

"  You  seem  fond  of  mackerel,"  said  another  of  the  party. 

"  Yery,"  responded  the  gentleman  thus  addressed,  who, 
I  was  shocked  to  perceive,  used  his  knife  upon  the  occasion. 

"  Take  my  advice,  then,  and  try  the  tail." 

"  I  will,"  said  the  youngster,  "if  you'll  have  the  kindness 
to  hand  it  over." 

"  Not  that  way,"  said  the  connoisseur  in  fish  ;  "  don't  cut 
the  tail  off.  So — pass  your  knife  under  and  slide  it  gently 
up  to  the  head." 

"  Oh,"  said  Staunton,  "  that's  the  way,  is  it  ?  Here  goes 
then." 

"Now,  before  you  go  any  farther,  let  me  give  you  a 
second  piece  of  advice." 

"  What's  that  ?" 

"  The  next  time,  don't  be  green  enough  to  let  any  one 
persuade  you  you  don't  know  how  to  eat  a  mackerel ;  go  on, 
I  wish  you  a  good  appetite." 

The  young  fellow  thus  addressed,  feeling  that  he  was 
"sold/'  laid  down  his  knife  and  fork,  and  staring  at  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING. 

0 

speaker,  exclaimed — "  For  half  a  farthing  I'd  make  you  eat 
it,  and  begin-at  the  head ;  mind  your  own  business,  can't 
you,  and  leave  me  to  mind  mine  ?" 

"  Take  a  glass  of  wine  with  me,  my  boy,  and  don't  put 
yourself  in  a  passion  about  nothing." 

Such  is  an  average  specimen  of  the  conversation  which 
took  place  at  the  adjoining  table ;  jokes  of  a  like  nature 
seemed  the  order  of  the  day,  and  each  moment  the  merri- 
ment of  the  party  waxed  louder  and  more  boisterous.  My 
father  and  I  exchanged  glances,  arid  sat  silent,  but  not  un- 
observant spectators. 

"We  are  bound  for  the  east,  I  believe?"  the  gentleman 
said  who  was  named  Staunton.. 

"  So  I  hear,"  responded  Ellis. 

"  Well,  we  shall  have  only  one  more  dinner  on  shore,  so 
let's  make  the  most  of  our  time." 

"  The  deuce,  when  do  we  sail  then  ?"  inquired  the  mack- 
erel-eater. 

"You  may  sail  when  you  please,  but  the  Ida  sails  on 
Tuesday,"  said  Staunton  sententiously. 

The  dinner,  which  had  been  protracted  through  its  vari- 
ous stages,  was  at  last  concluded,  the  cloth  was  removed,  a 
plentiful  supply  of  claret,  with  a  handsome  dessert,  was 
placed  upon  the  table,  and  the  party  drank  and  laughed 
and  "chaffed"  each  other  with  the  most  boisterous  good 
humor.  Staunton  told  droll  stories,  sang  droll  songs,  and 
pushed  the  bottle  backwards  and  forwards,  making  noise 
enough  for  a  half  dozen  ;  so,  what  with  laughing,  and  talk- 
ing, and  drinking,  the  scene  grew  too  noisy  to  afford  any 
farther  amusement,  and  we  prepared  to  retire  to  our  re- 
spective apartments. 

"  Charley,  my  boy,"  my  father  said,  as  we  proceeded  up 
stairs,  "  what  do  you  think  of  your  shipmates  ?" 

"  A  noisy  set  of  fellows  enough,  sir,"  I  said. 


172  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  I  hope  the  first  time  you  dine  together,  you  will  let 
them  see  you  know  the  head  of  a  mackerel  from  the  tail," 
my  father  said,  with  an  air  of  quiet  raillery,  as  he  bade  me 
good  night. 

The  next  morning  we  waited  on  the  captain,  to  show  we 
had  a  letter  of  introduction  from  my  uncle.  My  father  sent 
up  his  card,  and  was  at  once  admitted.  Captain  Deadeye 
was  a  fat  man,  with  a  red  face,  broad  shoulders,  and,  what 
is  vulgarly  called,  a  paunch.  He  had  a  tight  look  about 
him,  as  if  all  the  blood  in  his  body  was  squeezed  up  into  his 
head,  which  appearance  was  probably  produced  by  a  stiff 
military  stock  he  wore  ;  he  was  attired  in  a  somewhat  faded 
uniform  ;  he  was  unbuttoned,  and  his  trousers  seemed  very 
much  too  wide  for  him.  He  received  us  with  great  cordial- 
ity, and  begged  us  to  be  seated. 

"  You  have  come  in  good  time  ;  we  sail  the  day  after  to- 
morrow." 

"  Indeed,"  said  my  father.  "  Allow  me  to  introduce  my 
son  to  you." 

Captain  Deadeye  then  shook  hands  with  me.  "  I  hope 
the  youngster  will  do  you  credit,"  he  said,  with  a  grim 
smile  ;  "  if  he  only  makes  as  good  a  sailor  as  his  uncle,  he'll 
do."  This  was  encouragement ;  and  I  expressed  my  ac- 
knowledgments by  a  blush,  which  I  endeavored  in  vain  to 
repress. 

"  This  being  your  last  day,  we  shall  not  occupy  your 
time  further,  Captain  Deadeye  ;  I  wished  only  to  make  the 
boy  known  to  you  before  he  went  on  board,"  my  father  said, 
preparing  to  take  his  leave. 

"  Not  a  bit ;  I  never  put  off  things  to  the  last  moment, 
so  I've  got  plenty  of  time  on  hand  ;  but  if  you'll  dine  with 
me  here  at  seven,  I  shall  be  delighted  ;  your  son  will  then 
have  an  opportunity  of  becoming  acquainted  with  some  of 
his  messmates." 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  If3 

My  father  promised  his  assent,  and  we  withdrew  from  the 
great  man's  presence,  rather  favorably  impressed  by  the  re- 
sult of  our  interview. 

We  passed  the  remainder  of  the  morning  in  wandering 
about  the  town,  and  inspecting  such  lions  as  the  place  con- 
tained. We  visited  the  dock-yard,  walked  down  to  the 
pier,  and  saw  the  steamers,  which  plied  to  and  fro  to  Hyde, 
whose  white  houses,  ranged  tier  above  tier,  sparkled  in  the 
autumn  sunshine.  To  me,  however,  the  most  interesting 
object  of  contemplation  was  the  old  "  Victory,"  about  which 
I  had  heard  and  read  so  much  ;  there  she  lay,  a  sheer  hulk  ; 
that  old  vessel,  which  had  carried  the  thunders  of  England 
through  so  many  a  storm  of  fight.  How  tremendous  she 
must  have  been  once.  How  helpless  she  looks  now,  for  the 
shirts  and  other  garments,  which  were  hung  upon  lines  to 
dry,  fluttered  in  the  breeze,  and  gave  the  gallant  old  ship 
more  the  appearance  of  a  floating  laundry  than  anything 
else. 

Having  inspected  the  docks  and  the  neighborhood,  we 
strolled  until  it  was  time  to  go  and  dress  for  dinner.  The 
captain,  upon  our  arrival,  received  us  with  a  cordial  wel- 
come, and  introduced  us  to  such  of  the  company  as  had 
already  assembled  ;  among  them  were  two  of  the  young 
gentlemen  who  had  dined  in  the  coffee-room  of  the  George 
upon  the  previous  day,  to  whom  I  was  gravely  introduced. 
"  I  like  to  make  my  officers  acquainted  with  each  other,  if 
I  can,  before  they  go  on  board  ;  you'll  see  some  more  of 
them  by  and  by."  I  was  then  presented  to  Mrs.  Deadeye, 
and  afterwards  to  her  daughter  ;  and  the  remainder  of  the 
guests  soon  arriving,  dinner  was  announced,  and,  marshalled 
in  due  order,  we  proceeded  down  a  flight  of  somewhat  nar- 
row stairs,  which  led  to  the  place  of  entertainment. 

With  the  exception  of  a  gentleman  in  a  white  tie  and  a 
suit  of  unexceptionable  sables,  whom  I  rightly  conjectured 


174  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

to  be  a  clergyman,  the  remainder  of  the  male  portion  of  the 
party,  my  father,  of  course,  also  excluded,  were  of  the  sea- 
faring order.  Captain  Deadeye  was  in  high  feather,  and 
though  he  struck  me  as  being  deficient  in  that  polish  which 
I  should  have  expected  a  man  of  his  rank  to  possess,  he 
seemed  very  good-natured  ;  and  for  so  great  a  man,  (for  at 
that  time  I  would  have  regarded  a  prime-minister  with  a 
good  deal  less  awe,)  I  thought  him  affable  and  condescend- 
ing to  a  degree.  His  better  half  was  a  buxom  woman  of 
forty-five  or  thereabouts  ;  and  of  their  daughter  Julia,  all 
that  I  can  say  is,  that  any  comparison  between  her  and  my 
fair  cousin  would  have  been  infinitely  to  the  disadvantage 
of  the  former. 

When  we  were  fairly  seated  at  the  table,  and  the  first 
clatter  of  plates,  knives,  and  glasses  had  subsided,  the  soup 
being  removed,  and  the  sherry  handed  round,  I  had  more 
time  to  observe  the  company  who  were  then  and  there  as- 
sembled. 

The  first  lieutenant  sat  nearly  opposite  to  me  :  he  was  a 
bluff  weather-beaten  person,  verging  upon  forty,  with  a  cast 
of  countenance  which  expressed,  as  strongly  as  a  face  can, 
the  strong  resolution  and  determination  of  his  nature.  In 
person,  he  was  short  and  thick  set ;  and  having  suffered  se- 
verely from  the  small-pox  during  his  infancy,  Mr.  Morris 
was  not,  by  any  means,  what  could  be  called  a  handsome 
man. 

The  second  lieutenant  impressed  me  less  favorably  than 
his  senior :  he  was  rather  better-looking,  but  he  had  a  pee- 
vish and  irascible  air  about  him ;  his  voice  was  singularly 
harsh  and  forbidding,  and  his  tone  dictatorial  enough  for  an 
admiral,  at  the  least. 

In  the  persons  of  two  other  guests  I  recognized,  as  I 
have  already  said,  members  of  the  dinner-party  at  the 
George  on  the  preceding  day,  and  with  them,  ladies,  whose 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  175 

names  I  could  not  learn,  and  my  father  and  myself — such 
was  our  party. 

The  conversation  turned  chiefly  upon  nautical  matters, 
and  the  second  lieutenant  monopolized  the  conversation,  I 
thought,  rather  more  than  was  consistent  with  my  ideas  of 
good  breeding.  The  midshipmen  paid  delicate  attentions  to 
the  young  ladies,  and  drank  as  much  wine  as  they  could  get 
hold  of  without  attracting  public  observation. 

Of  the  captain's  conversation  I  could  not  hear  much  ; 
it  was  shared  for  the  most  part  between  my  father,  who  sat 
on  one  side  of  him,  and  an  elderly  gentlewoman,  splendidly 
arrayed  in  green  satin,  who  sat  upon  the  other. 

Upon  the  whole  I  was  not  sorry  when  the  banquet, 
which  appeared  to  me  to  be  protracted  to  an  unusual  ex- 
tent, had  terminated ;  and  it  was  with  unfeigned  satisfac- 
tion that  I  found  myself  again  in  the  drawing-room,  when 
the  captain's  lady  took  kindly  notice  of  my  forlorn  condi- 
tion, and  inquired  after  my  mother,  asked  if  I  had  any  sis- 
ters, and  whether  I  liked  the  idea  of  going  to  sea. 

When  I  sought  my  pillow  that  night  and  fell  asleep,  what 
a  confused  train  of  disjointed  images  tumbled  as  it  were 
through  my  brain.  I  thought  of  Lucy — then  she  suddenly 
changed  into  Mrs.  Deadeye — with  whom  I  thought  I  was 
on  the  eve  of  something  like  matrimony,  in  the  village 
church  near  the  old  hall ;  while  a  post-chaise  with  four 
horses  was  waiting  to  convey  us  on  a  hymeneal  expedition 
into  North  Wales.  This  dream  was  so  awful  that  I  wakened 
suddenly,  but  it  was  only  to  fall  asleep  again,  and  dream  of 
things  still  more  strange  and  appalling,  which  I  shall  not 
stay  and  set  down  here. 


176  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

CHAPTER     III. 
THE    IDA. 

THERE  was  a  heavy  drizzling  rain  falling,  and  it  blew  a 
stiffish  breeze,  when  at  the  appointed  hour  we  set  out  in 
the  captain's  barge  for  the  ship,  which  was  lying  at  some 
distance.  My  father  would  see  the  last  of  me,  he  said,  so 
he  accompanied  me  on  board,  when  we  parted.  To  describe 
the  feeling  of  desolation  which  came  over  me,  when  I  saw 
him  re-enter  the  boat,  would  be  impossible  ;  a  melancholy 
foreboding  was  on  my  mind  that  I  should  see  the  old  man 
no  more ;  and,  as  I  leaned  over  the  side  of  the  gigantic 
vessel,  to  watch  the  boat  now  rapidly  receding  in  the  dis- 
tance, I  felt  that  ere  long  I  would  vainly  sigh  for  the  tran- 
quil scene  of  my  early  years,  and  regret  the  hour  when  I 
had  been  tempted  to  forsake  them.  I  never  felt  more  deeply 
the  strength  of  the  ties  which  bound  my  heart  to  my  old 
home  than  I  did  at  that  moment,  but  it  was  too  late  for  re- 
gret. The  past  was  beyond  recall.  All  that  remained  for 
me  to  do  was  to  endeavor  to  profit  by  those  lessons  of  wis- 
dom, which  had  so  often  been  impressed  upon  my  mind  ; 
and  something  like  the  feeling  came  at  last  to  my  mind, 
that  even  should  I  utterly  fail  in  my  duty,  it  would  not 
be  for  any  want  of  energetic  determination  on  my  part  to 
fulfil  it. 

When  I  looked  about  me,  the  uproar  and  confusion  which 
prevailed  upon  deck  were  beyond  anything  I  could  have 
imagined ;  officers  were  thundering  forth  their  orders  to  a 
confused  crowd  of  seamen,  in  a  language  which  seemed  to 
me  utterly  unintelligible.  The  men  were  rushing  to  and  fro, 
tumbling  about  in  all  directions,  and  cursing  vociferously. 
A  number  of  strangers  and  women,  who,  having  received 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  177 

permission  to  come  on  board  to  see  their  relations,  were 
still  lingering,  seemed  in  everybody's  way. 

I  spoke  to  some  of  the  people  near  me,  bnt  they  were  too 
busily  engaged  to  pay  attention,  nor  did  they  even  seem 
to  understand  what  I  was  saying ;  and  during  the  greater 
part  of  the  forenoon  I  remained  in  this  forlon  condition, 
until  at  last  I  succeeded  in  discovering  a  quiet  corner  where 
I  could  rest  my  aching  head,  and  recover  the  possession  of 
my  wandering  senses. 

After  some  hours  of  active  exertion,  the  officer  in  com- 
mand at  last  succeeded  in  getting  things  in  some  degree  to 
rights.  The  deck  was  cleared  of  the  strangers  who  had 
come  on  board,  and  the  boats  from  shore,  in  a  perfect  flo- 
tilla, by  which  the  Ida  had  been  surrounded,  gradually  dis- 
appeared towards  evening.  The  captain  came  on  board, 
attired  in  full  uniform  ;  he  was  received  by  the  two  senior 
officers,  and  in  a  short  time  afterwards  orders  were  given  to 
weigh  anchor.  I  was  cheered  in  some  degree  by  the  lively 
sound  of  the  fife,  and  the  animation  of  the  active  sailors — 
who  worked  at  the  windlass,  and  were  springing  about  the 
rigging — was  not  without  its  effect  in  recovering  my  spirits. 
The  wind  was  fresh  and  fair ;  the  evening  cleared  ;  and  the 
Ida  glided  from  her  moorings,  saluted  from  the  shore  and 
from  the  ships  we  passed,  by  loud  cheers,  which  were  repaid 
with  interest  by  our  crew. 

It  is  a  rare  sight,  and  no  novice  has  ever  seen  it  for  the 
first  time  without  emotion,  to  witness  the  departure  of  one 
of  these  great  bulwarks  of  our  national  glory,  thus  setting 
forth  upon  her  adventurous  career  ;  a  thousand  hearts, 
ready  to  brave  the  battle-fire  or  the  wreck,  are  beating 
within  her,  and  look  upon  their  native  land,  may  be,  for  the 
last  time.  They  go  forth  in  the  pride  of  hope,  they  dream 
but  little  of  the  fury  of  the  storm,  the  crash  of  battle,  or 

8* 


178  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

the  home  which  may  await  them  in  the  unfathomed  caverns 
of  the  great  deep.  Their  hearts  beat  high  with  confidence 
and  with  joy ;  and  of  the  two,  the  feelings  of  those  on 
shore  are  perhaps  less  to  be  envied  than  the  adventurous 
sailors. 

Occupied  by  reflections  such  as  these,  it  was  some  time 
before  I  mustered  up  resolution  to  inspect  the  quarters 
which  had  been  allotted  to  me.  Having  at  length  found  a 
sailor  who  appeared  sufficiently  unoccupied  to  warrant  me 
in  requesting  his  guidance,  I  was  shown  the  way  down  a 
ladder  into  a  dark  region  between  decks,  where,  in  the  fore- 
part of  the  vessel,  the  midshipmen's  berth  was  situated. 
The  domain  at  first  sight  seemed  by  no  means  an  agreeable 
residence,  nor  did  a  further  inspection  tend  to  increase  its 
attractions.  The  greater  portion  of  the  room  was  taken  up 
by  a  deal  table,  above  which  was  suspended  a  lamp.  The 
table-cloth  was  spread  as  if  for  supper,  and  the  clatter  of 
plates  somewhere  in  the  neighborhood  indicated  that  prepa- 
rations were  on  foot  for  that  repast.  My  allotted  seat  being 
pointed  out  to  me,  I  saw  nothing  better  to  do  than  to  sit 
down  and  occupy  it — which  I  did  accordingly,  marvelling 
much  at  the  miserable  accommodation  which  her  gracious 
Majesty  was  pleased  to  afford  to  the  officers  in  her  service. 

I  do  not  remember  ever  feeling  more  profoundly  misera- 
ble than  I  did  at  that  moment.  The  spot  I  occupied,  from 
the  culinary  preparations  which  were  going  forward,  began 
soon  to  be  invaded  by  a  combination  of  sa.vory  odors,  which, 
in  that  close  atmosphere,  was  very  far  from  agreeable.  To 
eat,  I  felt,  would  be  quite  out  of  the  question  ;  had  I  known, 
then,  the  comfort  to  be  derived  from  tobacco,  I  should,  in 
all  probability,  have  solaced  myself  with  a  pipe  ;  but  that 
was  an  anodyne  as  yet  unknown  to  me.  I  felt  a  dejection 
of  spirits  and  a  sense  of  misery  it  would  be  impossible  to 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  179 

describe.  I  wished  heartily  I  had  never  left  home,  and  I 
felt  so  entirely  down  on  my  luck,  that  I  would  have  will- 
ingly exchanged  situations  with  old  Joe  Harvey,  my  father's 
gardener.  I  was  soon,  however,  aroused  from  my  dreamy 
reflections  by  the  appearance  of  supper,  simultaneously  with 
which  my  new  associates  came  tumbling  in — with  some  of 
whom  the  reader  is  already  acquainted.  They  were  eight 
in  number,  and,  when  seated,  were  quite  sufficient  to  fill  the 
room.  I  was  introduced  in  succession  to  each  of  them,  by 
my  friends  of  the  preceding  day,  and  we  soon  became  on 
excellent  terms.  I  was  let  into  all  the  secrets  of  the  mess, 
down  even  to  the  rogueries  of  the  purser.  The  peculiar 
idiosyncrasies  of  the  captain,  as  well  as  of  the  first  lieuten- 
ant, were  explained  to  me  in  a  few  graphic  touches. 

My  companions  addressed  themselves  at  first  so  vigor- 
ously to  the  evening  repast,  that  they  found  but  little  leis- 
ure for  the  exercise  of  their  conversational  powers.  The 
viands  disappeared  with  a  celerity  which  seemed  marvellous. 
The  empty  dishes  were  cleared  away,  the  allowance  of  grog 
was  placed  on  the  festive  board,  and  at  length,  with  one 
consent,  the  tongues  of  the  company  were  unloosed. 

"  I  say,  old  fellow,"  said  a  messmate,  whom  they  called 
Hamilton,  "  why  do  they  keep  secret  where  we  are  bound 
for  such  a  deuce  of  a  mystery  ?" 

"  It's  no  mystery  at  all.  We  are  to  cruise  awhile  in  the 
Indian  Ocean," 

"Why  did  Deadeye  look  so  d — d  important,  then,  when 
we  talked  about  it  the  other  day  at  dinner?" 

"  That's  not  it ;  I'm  in  the  secret,"  said  the  little  macke- 
rel-eater, whose  name  was  Ashton. 

"  Holloo,  let  us  hear  what  the  boy  has  to  say.  Now  then, 
Ashton,  out  with  it !" 

"  He  knows  no  more  than  Adam,"  broke  in  Hamilton. 

"  Not  half  so  much,  perhaps,"  said  Ellis. 


180  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  Do  you  think  old  Deadeye  knows  himself?"  suggested 
another. 

"  I  tell  you,  I  know,"  persisted  Ashton. 

"  Why  the  devil  don't  you  tell  it,  then?" 

"Stop  his  grog  until  he  does,"  shouted  Ellis;  and  the 
glass  which  contained  that  liquor,  whereof  Ashton  was 
drinking,  was  seized  upon  forthwith. 

"  Now  then,  out  with  it,  as  Mrs.  Brown  said  to  her  son 
when  he  swallowed  a  farthing,"  thundered  Arbuthnot,  who 
was  the  wit  of  the  midshipman's  ward. 

"  We're  going  to  hunt  down  the  Malay  pirates,"  said  Ash- 
ton, compelled  by  this  powerful  process  to  reveal  his  secret. 

"  Who  told  you  that,  Spooney  ?" 

"  My  uncle  heard  it  from  a  friend,  who  has  a  connection 
with  the  Admiralty." 

"  The  Admiralty  be  d — d  ;  give  him  back  his  grog ;  he 
knows  nothing  about  it." 

"  I  thought  I  heard  Captain  Deadeye  whispering  to  my 
father  somerhing  about  China,"  mildly  suggested  I,  break- 
ing silence  for  the  first  time. 

"  That's  nearer  the  mark,  somewhat,"  said  Hamilton. 

"  What's  the  difference  between  the  Chinese  and  the 
Malays,  I  should  like  to  know  ?"  said  the  little  mackerel- 
eater,  who,  having  swallowed  at  a  single  draught  the  entire 
of  his  grog,  had  now  regained  his  confidence. 

"  Ashton,  were  you  ever  at  school?" 

"  To  be  sure  I  was." 

"  Were7  you  ever  flogged  ?" 

"  Generally  speaking,  about  once  a  week." 

"Then  they  should  have  done  it  once  a  day,  and  you 
might  have  known  something ;  as  it  is,  Heaven  help  you  I 
you  are  little  better  than  a  donkey." 

"  Poor  devil  I  don't  bully  him  so  infernally,"  Hamilton 
said,  smiling  kindly  on  the  benighted  midshipman. 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  181 

"  What  sort  of  a  fellow  is  Morris,  the  first  lieutenant — 
does  any  one  know  anything  about  him  ?"  inquired  one  of 
my  messmates. 

"  Don't  speak  so  loud,  or  he  may  happen  to  hear  you. 
He's  on  deck  with  old  Deadeye,  looking  out  for  squalls :  I 
saw  him  as  I  came  down." 

"  I  don't  know,  I  never  saw  him  in  my  life  before  until  I 
met  him  at  dinner ;  he  seems  a  very  good-natured  sort  of 
muff." 

"  He's  a  Scotchman,"  said  Hamilton. 

"  The  deuce  he  is ;  I  don't  like  that ;  I  sailed  with  a 
Sawney  once,  and  he  was  next  door  to  a  brute." 

"  Morris  looks  like  a  tartar." 

"So  does  his  wife — she  dined  at  Deadeye's." 

"Wife  !  what  business  has  a  lieutenant  with  a  wife  ?  I 
should  like  to  be  informed  of  that." 

"She  had  red  hair,  and  eyes  like  a  ferret,  and  put  me 
altogether  in  mind  of  a  dose  of  Epsom  salts." 

A  roar  of  laughter  followed  this  sally,  in  the  midst  of 
which  the  door  opened,  and  the  fortunate  proprietor  of  this 
exquisite  object  of  wedded  endearment  put  his  head  into 
the  room. 

"  Less  noise  if  you  please,  gentlemen  ;  Captain  Deadeye 
is  extremely  surprised  at  such  a  disturbance." 

"  Has  he  heard  us,  do  you  think  ?"  whispered  Hamilton, 
as  the  door  closed  upon  the  first  lieutenant. 

"  Of  course  he  has  ;  he  is  easy  in  his  mind,  at  any  rate, 
in  one  respect." 

"  And  what  may  that  be  ?" 

"  Why,  that  you  are  not  in  love  with  his  wife." 

"  No ;  my  affections  are  unalterably  plighted  to  ano- 
ther." 

"Who  may  she  be?" 

"  I'll  tell  you  if  you  won't  try  to  cut  me  out." 


182  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Certainly  not." 

"  I'm  afraid  of  you." 

"What,  is  the  fair  creature  on  board?" 

"I  wish  she  was." 

"  How,  then,  can  I  interfere  with  your  prospects,  most 
cautious  Paddy?" 

"  It's  Julia  Deadeye." 

"  What !  the  little  girl  who  squints  ?" 

"  She  doesn't  squint,  and  she'll  have  ten  thousand  pounds. 
I'll  marry  her  when  I  return — retire  from  the  service,  and 
keep  a  pack  of  hounds." 

"  You  had  better  learn  to  sail  first ;  do  you  remember 
our  excursion  to  Hampstead  ?" 

" What  happened?"  inquired  Ellis. 

"  He  rode  over  a  respectable  elderly  lady,  and  he  shortly 
afterwards  broke  the  horse's  knees." 

I  have  recorded  this  conversation,  not  from  any  exagge- 
rated notion  of  its  importance,  but  because  it  affords  an 
average  sample  of  our  daily  topics  of  discussion.  Of  my 
messmates,  the  only  one  for  whom  I  felt,  upon  putting  a 
question,  I  could  conceive  any  feeling  akin  to  regard,  was 
Hamilton.  His  appearance  was  singularly  prepossessing. 
He  was  tall  and  rather  strongly  built ;  his  chiselled  features, 
flowing,  light  brown  hair,  and  graceful  figure,  would  of 
themselves-have  arrested  my  attention  ;  but  what  made  the 
greatest  impression  upon  me,  was  a  good-humored  and  ge- 
nial expression,  which  indicated  the  kindness  of  his  nature. 
We  spent  the  evening  pleasantly  enough  together,  but  I 
was  not  sorry  when  bed-time  arrived.  Hamilton  showed 
me  how  to  get  into  my  hammock,  and  laughed  heartily 
when  he  saw  me  rolling  round  and  tumble  out  on  the  other 
side ;  by  his  assistance  I  contrived  to  regain  my  position, 
when  sleep  soon  came  to  steal  away  my  wretchedness  ;  and 
I  wakened  the  next  morning,  thinking  I  was  still  at  Heath- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  183 

field  Hall.  When  I  went  on  deck,  I  found  the  weather 
thick  and  squally,  and  through  the  cold,  miserable  haze  of  a 
November  day,  I  saw  the  Needle  Rocks,  the  high  cliffs  at 
the  back  of  the  Isle  of  Wight,  far  in  the  distance,  and  re- 
ceding gradually  until  they  became  a  mere  outline  :  all  the 
noise  and  hurry  of  departure  had  subsided  into  the  reality 
of  a  trackless  expanse  of  sea. 

From  that  time  forth  I  began  to  pay  strict  attention  to 
learning  the  details  of  my  duty.  I  studied  drawing  and 
navigation,  and  read  eagerly  everything  I  could  lay  my 
hands  on,  that  had  any  bearing  on  my  profession.  I  soon 
acquired  the  favor  of  the  first  lieutenant,  before  I  had  been 
many  weeks  on  board,  by  the  strict  attention  I  paid  to  the 
little  duties  he  gave  me  to  perform.  I  had  been  put  into  a 
watch  and  stationed  in  the  foretop,  and  quartered  at  the 
foremost  guns  on  the  main  deck.  Although  I  had  been 
told  by  the  youngsters  that  Mr.  Morris  was  a  bearish, 
surly,  and  villainous  Scotchman,  I  never  experienced  any- 
thing but  kindness  from  him  ;  his  manners,  even  when  under 
the  strongest  excitement,  were  uniformly  those  of  a  gentle- 
man, and  he  was  always  ready  to  impart  to  me  such  informa- 
tion as  he  possessed  upon  such  affairs.  With  the  second  in 
command,  however,  I  was  not  so  fortunate  ;  his  sole  delight 
appeared  to  be  in  inflicting  every  possible  species  of  annoy- 
ance upon  those  who  were  so  unfortunate  as  to  be  placed 
under  his  control.  He  was  of  a  nature  naturally  mean, 
and  although  he  had  bowed  and  fawned  himself  into  the 
good  graces  of  the  captain,  boy  as  I  was,  I  had  little  diffi- 
culty in  perceiving  that  neither  with  my  messmates,  nor 
with  the  crew,  was  he  by  any  means  a  favorite. 


184  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OB, 

CHAPTER     IY. 
MY  FIRST  ADVENTURE. 

I  MUST  leave  to  the  imagination  of  my  readers  the  suffer- 
ings which,  for  the  first  few  days,  I  underwent.  It  was  a 
considerable  period  before  I  obtained  the  use  of  what  are 
technically  called  my  sea  legs  ;  and  as  to  eating,  Lord  bless 
me !  the  recollection  of  my  endeavors  to  swallow  the  salt 
beef  and  potatoes  haunts  me  to  this  day.  Long  after  the 
first  terrible  sensation  had  passed,  my  aversion  to  food  still 
continued.  Whether  it  was  the  earliness  of  the  hour,  or 
the  disagreeable  sights  and  smells  by  which  I  was  assailed, 
which  usually  act  as  a  check  upon  all  appetites  fresh  from 
shore,  I  shall  not  pause  to  determine  ;  but  it  was  not  with- 
out great  difficulty  I  at  last  prevailed  upon  myself  to  swal- 
low a  morsel.  The  beverage  was  not  less  unpalatable  than 
the  food ;  the  black-strap,  an  awful  mixture,  tasting  like 
sloe-juice  and  logwood,  was  only  worse  than  the  grog ;  and 
whilst  my  messmates  were  imbibing  their  potations,  I  re- 
flected upon  my  new  situation,  not  without  considerable  re- 
gret. I  remember  well  how,  notwithstanding  all  my  enthu- 
siasm, and  the  aspirations  after  fame  and  adventure  which 
had  warmed  my  early  life,  my  heart  failed  me  as  I  contrast- 
ed my  position  with  that  which  I  had  renounced.  When  I 
remembered  the  old  house,  with  its  light  and  pleasant  aspect, 
the  summer  woods  waving  round  it,  and  the  perfume  of  the 
fresh  flowers  coming  in  through  the  open  windows,  and  con- 
trasted those  scenes  with  the  gloomy  hole  in  which  I  was 
cabined,  cribbed  and  confined  with  the  rough  uneducated 
men,  whose  very  language  was  a  new  dialect  to  me — with 
my  noisy  companions  uttering  their  opinions  upon  all  man- 
ner of  subjects,  of  which  I  knew  nothing;  when  I  con- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  185 

trasted  all  this  with  my  old  home,  and  my  former  associ- 
ates, I  must  confess  I  felt  a  faintness  of  heart  which  was 
most  oppressive.  Since  these  days,  years  have  rolled  away, 
yet  my  early  sufferings  are  still  fresh  in  my  memory  ;  nor 
have  the  varied  scenes  through  which  I  have  passed  oblite- 
rated my  recollection  of  them  in  the  very  least.  I  made 
up  my  mind,  however,  and  nerved  myself,  as  well  as  I  could, 
for  endurance.  A  midshipman's  berth  is  about  the  last 
place  on  earth  suited  to  the  indulgence  of  vain  regrets.  I 
spent  much  of  my  time  on  deck.  Scenes  of  adventure  be- 
gan once  more  to  come  back  upon  my  mind  ;  and  now  that 
we  were  on  the  broad  bosom  of  the  ocean,  the  regret  for  all 
I  had  left  behind,  and  the  doubts  and  misgivings  as  to  my 
chances  of  success  in  the  life  I  had  entered  upon,  began  to 
give  place  to  brighter  hopes.  Our  life  was,  for  some  time, 
unvaried  in  its  daily  routine.  In  time  I  got  accustomed  to 
the  night  watch,  which  at  first  I  found  rather  a  severe  trial. 
Gentlemen,  who  live  at  home  at  ease-,  and  never  leave  their 
comfortable  beds,  can  have  very  little  notion  of  the  immense 
discomfort  in  having  to  leave  one's  hammock  at  midnight, 
to  shiver  for  four  mortal  hours  on  deck  in  the  wet  and  cold. 
To  this,  however,  like  the  rest,  I  soon  became  inured  by 
practice.  The  weather,  after  some  time,  set  in  very  stormy. 
A  stiff  south-wester  was  blowing,  and  as  I  paced  the  deck, 
during  the  night  watch,  my  reveries  were  interrupted  by  a 
sudden  splash,  and  a  cry  of  "  man  overboard." 

"  Down  with  the  buoy,  and  pipe  the  cutter  away,"  sang 
out  the  second  lieutenant. 

The  order  thus  given  was  promptly  executed.  The  cut- 
ter was  lowered,  and  I  jumped  into  it ;  not  a  moment  was 
lost  in  getting  out  the  oars,  and  lighted  by  the  buoy,  whose 
lurid  glare  fell  upon  the  heaving  water,  we  pulled  rapidly 
towards  the  object  of  our  search  ;  but,  notwithstanding  all 
our  exertions,  so  great  had  been  the  way  upon  the  ship, 


186  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

that  some  time  elapsed  before  we  could  come  up  with  our 
beacon  light.  We  shouted  out  the  man's  name,  but  all  was 
silent.  "  Is  he  a  good  swimmer  ?"  I  inquired. 

"  Lord  love  ye,  sir,  Bob  Smith  can  swim  like  a  duck,  no 
fear  of  him." 

I  thought  I  heard  a  faint  cry  some  distance  to  windward. 
"  Give  way,  my  lads,  I  hear  him  on  the  starboard,"  sung 
out  the  quartermaster,  whose  ear  had  caught  the  same 
sound. 

"  Hark,  sir  !  that  is  the  captain's  voice  ;  I  hear  him  hail- 
ing us." 

"Have  you  found  him  ?"  sung  out  Captain  Deadeye, 
who,  it  would  appear,  had  been  roused  by  the  tumult. 

"  No,  sir  1" 

"  You  have  got  too  far,  I  hear  him  on  the  larboard — pull 
now  with  a  will." 

The  boat's  crew  pulled  like  devils  towards  the  spot  indi- 
cated— we  rested  to  listen,  but  not  the  faintest  sound,  save 
the  plashing  of  the  waves  and  the  drip  of  the  oars,  could  be 
distinguished. 

"  Hist !"  exclaimed  every  one  almost  simultaneously,  as  a 
faint  wailing  moan  came  floating  on  the  waters  from  a  spot 
apparently  quite  close  at  hand.  We  strained  every  nerve  and 
soon  reached  it ;  but  we  could  discover  nothing.  Again 
we  rested,  and  floated  over  the  surface  of  the  waves,  whose 
dark  ridges,  tipped  with  foam,  shone  like  silver  in  the  moon- 
light ;  at  one  moment  we  thought  we  heard  the  same  cry, 
but  it  proved  to  be  only  the  wind  whistling  off  the  blade 
of  one  of  our  upturned  oars. 

"  By  jingo  I  there  he  is,"  sung  out  the  coxswain.  And 
there — no  mistake  this  time,  we  heard  a  sound  like  some 
one  swimming. 

§"  Call  him  by  name,"  I  said,  my  anxiety  roused  to  the 
very  uttermost. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  187 

"  Smith  !  Bob  Smith  !  hilloa,  my  boy,  hilloa  !"  sang  out 
the  coxswain,  with  the  voice  of  a  Stentor. 

There  was  no  reply. 

"It  is  all  up,"  the  mate  said,  resting  on  his  oars  ;  "  had 
we  not  better  make  for  the  ship  ?" 

"  Hark  !  there  it  is  again." 

"  It  is,  by  G—  !"  said  the  man  who  pulled  the  stroke  oar. 

"  I  hear  nothing,"  said  the  coxswain. 

"  No  more  do  I,"  said  the  stroke  oar. 

Whether  it  was  fancy  or  not  I  am  unable  to  say,  but  the 
voice  of  the  last  speaker  seemed  to  my  unpractised  ear 
tremulous  with  some  suppressed  emotion.  I  looked  at  his 
resolute  face,  tanned  by  exposure  to  the  sun  and  wind,  but 
could  detect  nothing  in  its  expression  more  than  usual.  It 
flashed  upon  me  then — all  that  I  had  heard  of  the  super- 
stition of  sailors  ;  and  I  thought  some  nonsense  of  this  kind 
might  be  weighing  on  the  man's  mind. 

"  Now,  for  another  pull ;"  I  said,  "  we  may  do  better  this 
time." 

"  You  ain't  a  going  £o  spend  the  night  floating  about 
here,  sir,  I  hope,"  said  the  coxswain,  touching  his  hat. 

"  Afraid  of  Bogy,  are  you  ?"  replied  the  stroke  oar,  who 
was  a  native  of  the  Emerald  Isle. 

"  Obey  your  orders  ;  we  won't  lose  a  chance,  so  long  as 
I  think  one  remains  ;  put  her  head  round  and  try  to  wind- 
ward ;  if  the  man  is  so  good  a  swimmer  as  you  say,  we 
shall  have  time  yet." 

The  men  bent  to  their  oars,  but,  it  was  quite  evident, 
no  longer  with  the  same  inclination  as  heretofore ;  some 
mysterious  influence,  likely  one  superior  to  mine,  was  at 
work  upon  them. 

"  Here  he  is  at  last,  I  see  him,  close  under  the  bow  ;"  and, 
in  my  anxiety  to  clutch  at  what  seemed  the  object  of  our 
search,  I  nearly  tumbled  overboard. 

8* 


188  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Alas  !  it  was  only  the  poor  fellow's  hat,  which,  npon  be- 
ing lifted  into  the  boat,  was  found  to  contain  nothing  but 
an  old  handkerchief,  stuffed  tightly  into  the  crown. 

We  had  not  more  than  sufficient  time  to  examine  the 
contents  of  the  hat,  when  our  attention  was  attracted  by 
what,  beyond  all  question,  seemed  to  be  the  missing  seaman 
swimming  rapidly  towards  us. 

"  Cheer  up,  my.  brave  fellow,  we'll  have  you  on  board  in 
an  instant !"  pushing  an  oar  towards  him,  as  I  thought. 

Suddenly,  however,  the  sound  of  swimming  ceased,  and 
the  oar  which  I  had  extended  no  sooner  touched  the  water 
than  we  were  covered  with  a  dash  of  spray  which  nearly 
swamped  us  ;  the  boat  vibrated  from  stem  to  stern,  and  for 
an  instant  I  thought  it  was  going  to  pieces. 

Not  a  soul  spoke  ;  the  men  clutched  eagerly  at  the  sides, 
as  if  to  steady  the  cutter,  as  she  rocked  to  and  fro  ;  their 
eyes  were  staring  with  terror ;  big  drops  of  perspiration 
were  standing  out  like  beads  upon  their  corded  foreheads. 

"  God  of  Heaven  1  that  accounts  for  poor  Bob  Smith,7' 
said  the  coxswain. 

"  What  is  it  ?"  I  inquired,  as  I  looked. 

11 A  shark  ! — look,  there  he  goes  ;"  and  as  I  looked,  I 
saw  a  dark  object  going  rapidly  through  the  water,  near 
the  surface,  in  a  direction  parallel  to  ours. 

I  gave  an  involuntary  shudder,  and  enjoined  silence  to 
the  men,  whose  fears  seemed  to  have  got  the  better  of  their 
reason. 

"Ah  I  no  ;  we  must  pull  for  our  lives  now,  if  we  would 
ever  reach  the  ship,"  said  one  of  them. 

"D — n  her  eyes  1 — where  is  she  ?  if  she  ha'n't  left  us  in 
the  lurch,  after  all,  my  name's  not  Brown,"  said  the  cox- 
swain. 

I  jumped  up  and  looked  around  ;  but  there,  far  as  the 
eye  could  reach,  lay  one  wide,  trackless  expanse  of  sea,  bro- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  189 


ken  only  by  the  crests  of  the  waves,  as  they  gleamed  in  the 
wan  moonlight ;  not  a  mast  nor  a  sail,  for  miles  around, 
was  visible  against  the  horizon. 

"  Now,  then,  for  it,  my  men,  with  a  will ;  unless  you 
choose  to  spend  the  night  here,  you  must  pull  for  it." 

"Ay,  indeed,"  broke  in  the  coxswain,  "for  there's  a  lub- 
ber down  there  will  make  acquaintance  with  some  of  us 
before  very  long." 

I  looked,  as  the  man  pointed,  and  it  was  with  difficulty  I 
refrained  from  an  exclamation  of  horror,  as  I  saw  moving 
slowly  beside  us,  just  under  the  surface  of  the  water,  the 
same  dark  object — a  long  track  of  phosphorescent  light  fol- 
lowed like  a  gleaming  meteor  in  its  wake.  Gracious  Hea- 
ven, it  was  a  shark  ! 

At  this  crisis,  the  wind,  which  had  blown  in  fitful  gusts, 
began  to  fall ;  the  moon,  too,  was  overcast,  and  to  add  to 
our  embarrassment,  the  men  seemed  by  no  means  inclined 
to  obey  the  orders  of  one  whom  they  evidently  considered  a 
greenhorn,  whose  rashness  had  led  them  into  their  present 
peril. 

"  Silence  I"  I  shouted  ;  "  pull  steadily  and  together,  or  I'll 
report  every  man  of  you,  when  I  get  on  board." 

"  And  when  '11  that  be,  I  should  like  to  know  ?  We'll  be 
aboard  of  Davy  Jones's  locker,  afore  long,  I'm  thinking," 
said  the  stroke  oar  in  a  surly  tone. 

Scarcely  were  the  words  out  of  his  mouth,  when  a  sudden 
jet  of  light  streamed  forth  in  the  distance,  followed  by  a 
loud  report,  which  came  booming  heavily  across  the  waters. 

"  Hurrah,  the  ship  I"  burst  forth  with:  a  hearty  cheer 
from  the  boat's  crew — recalling  them  to  their  duty  in  an 
instant— the  men  pulled  steadily  for  a  considerable  period, 
in  the  direction  whence  the  sound  proceeded  ;  but  although 
our  exertions  were  indefatigable,  and  we  were  actually 
streaming  with  perspiration,  we  seemed  to  approach  no 


190  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

nearer  to  the  object  of  our  pursuit ;  nothing  was  to  be  seen 
but  an  apparently  trackless  expanse  of  sea  and  sky.  Sud- 
denly, another  loud,  rushing  noise,  like  the  roar  of  a  cata- 
ract, was  heard  to  windward. 

" Another  gun,"  thought  I;  but  the  water,  which  had 
hitherto  been  so  smooth,  began  to  undulate  with  a  sudden 
motion,  and  a  terrific  hurricane,  driving  before  it  a  sheet  of 
foam,  came  driving  after  us.  There  was  little  need  for  the 
oars  now  ;  we  were  swept  before  the  tempest  as  you  see  a 
withered  leaf  blown  about  in  autumn.  There  was  nothing 
to  be  done  but  submit  quietly  to  whatever  end  Fate  had  in 
store  for  us.  The  spray  was  dashed  in  clouds  of  foam  thick 
enough  to  obscure  anything  around.  The  ocean  appeared 
to  seethe  like  a  boiling  cauldron,  while  the  heavens  over- 
head loomed  darkly  down  in  one  thick  impenetrable  pall. 
The  boat  was  already  half  full  of  water,  which  it  required 
incessant  exertion  to  keep  baling  out.  I  fully  expected 
that  we  should  go  to  the  bottom  every  instant.  This  state 
of  painful  suspense  was  too  agonizing  to  endure  much  long- 
er, and  I  felt  it  would  soon  be  terminated  one  way  or  other. 
I  looked  from  the  roaring  water  to  the  gloomy  sky,  and  as 
I  thought  of  the  foe  who  was  following  in  our  lee,  like  the 
sailor  in  the  Tempest,  I  would  have  sacrificed  all  my  hopes 
of  future  glory  for  an  acre  of  barren  heath  and  safety.  The 
faces  of  the  crew,  who  had  braved  a  hundred  times  battle 
and  wreck,  were  haggard  with  fear  ;  each  man  seemed  cer- 
tain that  his  hour  was  come ;  and  as  for  myself,  I  am  not 
ashamed  to  own,  that  in  that  terrible  moment  I  breathed  a 
silent  ejaculation  to  Heaven  for  mercy.  The  clouds,  which 
had  been  so  long  dashing  down  upon  us,  now  burst  ;  a  peal 
of  thunder,  that  was  absolutely  deafening,  followed ;  the 
very  flood-gates  of  heaven  appeared  to  open  ;  the  rain  fell 
in  torrents  ;  the  wind  abated,  and  from  the  clouds,  as  they 
were  rent  asunder,  far  up  in  the  serene  sky,  the  moon  shone 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  191 

forth  in  dazzling  brilliancy,  pouring  a  flood  of  serene  light 
upon  this  scene  of  terror.  No  poet  or  musing  lover  ever 
welcomed  that  glorious  light  with  more  heartfelt  joy  and 
gratitude,  for  it  revealed  a  sight  for  which  we  were  little 
prepared.  About  half  a  mile  distant,  with  studding  sails 
set,  and  her  canvas  gleaming,  like  silver,  in  the  moonlight, 
the  Ida  was  rapidly  bearing  down  upon  us.  A  flash  broke 
from  her  bows,  and  a  loud  report  came  booming  over  the 
waves.  The  boat's  crew  replied  with  a  hearty  cheer  ;  and 
I  felt  then,  for  the  first  time,  that  the  bitterness  of  death 
was  indeed  past. 


CHAPTER    Y. 

AN  ENEMY. 

I  PASS  over  a  considerable  interval  of  time,  which  slipped 
by,  unruffled  by  any  incident  save  the  monotonous  routine 
of  daily  duty,  to  which  I  gradually  became  accustomed. 
After  a  most  stormy  voyage  of  several  weeks,  which 
strained  the  ship  considerably,  and  entailed  upon  us  the 
loss  of  some  spars  and  sails,  we  found  ourselves  in  the  In- 
dian Sea.  Our  destination  was  no  longer  a  secret ;  we 
were  to  join  the  squadron  engaged  in  hostile  operations 
against  China.  We  were  passing  through  the  Straits  of 
Sunda,  with  a  favorable  breeze,  when,  just  as  the  sun  was 
going  down,  we  caught  sight  of  two  small  sails  in  the  hori- 
zon. A  thick  fog  coming  on  shortly  afterwards,  no  more 
was  thought  of  the  matter.  I  had  the  middle  watch.  A 
light,  drizzling  rain  was  falling,  and  the  ship  was  close- 
hauled,  carrying  royals.  The  men  had  made  up  their  minds 
for  a  quiet  night,  during  which  reefing  or  furling  would  be 
unnecessary.  Most  of  them  were  asleep  wherever  they 
could  stow  themselves  away,  and,  I  am  sorry  to  confess,  I 


SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

following  their  bad  example,  and  dreaming,  if  I  remem- 
er  aright,  of  old  scenes  which  I  might  never,  perhaps,  ro- 
visit  any  more,  when  I  was  suddenly  disturbed  by  a  sound 
like  the  creaking  of  oars.  I  was  awake  in  an  instant,  but 
so  entirely  had  my  mind  been  occupied  on  other  scenes  thai 
for  some  time,  I  was  under  the  impression  that  the  sounr* 
had  been  an  illusion.  I  thought,  however,  I  might  as  well 
look  about  me,  and  standing  bolt  upright,  I  peered  forth. 
It  was  time  I  did  so,  for  nearly  under  our  weather-bow, 
about  a  cable's  length  distant,  I  saw  two  small  sails,  which 
had  evidently  no  business  there,  so  I  called  out  as  loud  as  I 
could  bawl : 

"  Sail  ho,  close  aboard  !" 

The  first  lieutenant  was  beside  me  in  an  instant ;  with 
the  practised  eye  of  a  seaman  he  saw  at  once  what  was  to 
hand. 

"  Keep  the  ship  away  ;  keep  her  head  off,"  he  shouted  to 
the  man  at  the  wheel. 

Round  went  the  ship,  and  seizing  a  speaking-trumpet,  he 
shouted — 

"All  hands  on  deck — look  alive  ! — the  pirates  are  close 
aboard  us." 

Every  one  was  soon  in  motion.  It  is  a  remarkable  fact 
how  wide-awake  an  English  sailor  becomes  when  he  finds 
there  is  any  prospect  of  a  row.  The  men  came  tumbling 
up,  most  of  them  with  nothing  on  but  their  shirts  and  trou- 
sers. We  were  going  full  before  the  wind ;  and  Captain 
Deadeye's  voice  was  soon  heard,  ordering  the  braces  to  be 
laid  aft,  and  the  deck  cleared  for  action. 

Meantime,  the  strangers  were  no  longer  visible.  I 
thought  we  had  distanced  them,  but  soon  I  heard  the 
voice  of  Stauuton  exclaiming,  with  an  oath,  that  they  were 
close  under  our  weather-beam.  Orders  were  given  to  ease 
ship,  which  probably  saved  us  from  being  boarded  at  this 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  193 

moment.  Meanwhile,  everything  was  in  readiness.  The 
guns  had  been  shotted  and  run  forward,  loaded  with  grape 
and  canister.  I  saw  a  knot  of  men  busy  with  the  second 
gun  primed,  and  could  hear  the  voice  of  Deadeye,  as  he  or- 
dered how  it  was  to  be  pointed. 

"  There  can  be  no  mistake,  I  think,  Mr. ,"  he  said ; 

"  we'll  give  them  a  warmer  reception  than  they  bargained 
for." 

"  Mistake  !  by  G — ,"  growled  Morris,  "  you  might  blaze 
into  any  craft  on  these  seas,  and  never  hurt  a  respectable 
man,"  was  the  reply. 

All  the  men  were  now  at  their  quarters,  and  all  was  still 
but  the  rushing  sound  of  the  vessel  going  through  the 
water,  and  of  the  rising  gale  amongst  the  rigging. 

"Now,  men,  mind  your  aim,"  said  the  captain.  "I  will 
join  the  ship,  and  as  the  guns  come  to  bear  upon  the  boats 
nearest  to  you,  slap  it  right  into  them." 

"Starboard  your  helm,  and  bring  her  round  to  the  wind, 
my  man." 

As  she  came  slowly  round,  bang  !  went  a  carronade  right 
into  the  nearest  of  the  proas,  driving  it  into  staves,  and 
scattering  the  crew  in  the  water.  A  howl  arose,  like  that 
of  a  thousand  demons. 

A  breathless  stillness  ensued.  Orders  were  given  to 
open  the  arm-chest,  and  distribute  cutlasses  and  pistols. 
Everything  looked  ominous  ;  I  began  to  think  we  should 
have  a  desperate  engagement,  and  all  our  throats  cut  after- 
wards. 

By  this  time  the  ship  was  on  a  wind,  steering  full,  while 
the  two  remaining  proas  had  closed  under  our  quarter,  so 
-  as  to  avoid  the  possibility  of  our  having  another  slap  at 
them.  Deadeye  evidently  knew  what  they  were  at,  and 
with  the  view  of  out-manoeuvring  them,  he  ordered  the 
helmsman  to  tack.  Round  went  the  ship  ;  but  the  cursed 


194  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

proas,  lying  as  they  did  nearer  to  the  wind  than  we,  were 
still  so  close  under  our  lee-bow,  that  to  fire  upon  them  was 
out  of  the  question.  Such  was  the  pleasant  aspect  of 
affairs  ;  we  did  not  know  the  instant  we  might  be  boarded. 

"I  say,  young  >un,  you  ain't  funking,  are  you?"  said 
Hamilton,  who,  I  perceived,  had  a  drawn  cutlass  in  his 
hand  and  a  leather  belt  round  his  waist,  stuck  full  of 
pistols. 

"  Not  a  bit,"  said  I,  for  I  was  in  truth  too  much  inte- 
rested in  what  was  going  on  around  me  to  have  any  other 
feeling. 

The  pirates  were  now  close  under  our  beam,  and  just  as 
a  carronade  was  brought  to  bear  upon  them,  a  grapnel  was 
cast  from  the  nearest  of  them  with  admirable  precision  ;  it 
caught,  however,  only  by  a  ratlin,  which  a  sailor,  who  stood 
near,  severed  instantly  with  his  cutlass.  This  was  just  at 
the  moment  when  they  had  risen  to  haul  up  alongside  ;  so 
quick  was  the  release  that  about  half-a-dozen  who  were 
coming  up  our  sides  tumbled  into  the  sea,  and  the  Ida 
passed  ahead,  leaving  the  assailants  in  her  wake.  No 
sooner  had  we  got  clear  of  them  than  the  helm  was  put 
down  and  the  ship  came  into  the  wind  in  a  minute.  As  we 
passed,  each  of  our  guns  as  it  was  brought  to  bear  was 
discharged  in  succession,  but  without  effect.  They  doubled 
on  us,  however,  before  we  had  time  to  load  again,  and  were 
soon  close  on  our  wake. 

"  Persevering  fellows  those,"  said  old  Deadeye  to  the 
first  lieutenant.  "  We'll  have  a  visit  from  them  shortly,  I 
expect." 

"  Be  ready,  men,  to  receive  boarders." 

"Here  they  come,  by  jingo,"  I  said,  as  the  foremost 
ranging  close  alongside  poured  its  horde  of  miscreants  upon 
our  deck.  Up  to  this  moment  all  had  been  silent ;  a  yell 
now  arose,  which  seemed  to  read  the  very  heavens,  as  a. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  195 

close  hand-to-hand  encounter  ensued.  Such  an  infernal 
scene  I  never  expect  to  witness  again.  The  pirates  had 
stripped  themselves  almost  naked,  and  cursing  and  yelling, 
each  of  them  in  a  fashion  of  his  own,  fought  with  the  most 
desperate  courage.  Our  men  behaved  with  the  most  admi- 
rable coolness,  and  it  was  apparent  e^en  to  my  inexperi- 
enced eye  that  our  assailants  had  not  even  the  ghost  of  a 
chance  ;  indeed,  the  very  desperation  of  their  fighting 
showed  it.  The  second  of  the  boats  had  succeeded  in 
effecting  a  lodgment  of  her  crew  also.  They  were  in  the 
act  of  getting  over  the  netting  when  a  volley  of  fire  arms 
was  fired  which  sent  four  of  them  to  their  account.  The 
rest  succeeded  in  gaining  the  deck,  and  proved  a  most  formi- 
dable accession.  They  were  led  on  by  a  swarthy  fellow,  of 
herculean  proportions,  with  whom  Morris  was  soon  engaged 
in  a  hand-to-hand  encounter.  It  did  not  last  long,  for  the 
experienced  swordsman,  turning  aside  a  thrust,  at  a  blow 
clove  his  assailant  to  the  chine.  Hamilton  was  close  be- 
side me,  laying  about  him  furiously,  and  our  men  were 
fighting  with  all  the  gallantry  inherent  to  British  sailors. 
For  an  instant,  so  terrible  was  the  onslaught,  the  issue  of 
the  fight  seemed  dubious,  but  our  antagonists  at  length 
gave  way,  and  we  were  driving  them  towards  the  mast  of 
the  ship,  when  a  sudden  reinforcement  appeared  in  the 
shape  of  about  twenty  naked  savages,  who,  armed  to  the 
teeth,  suddenly  climbed  over  the  nettings,  and  came  to  the 
rescue  of  their  companions.  I  imagined  all  was  lost.  Our 
people,  with  the  exception  of  old  Deadeye  and  the  first  lieu- 
tenant, for  a  moment  held  back.  The  pirates  rallied  and 
fought  with  renewed  courage  ;  it  was  now  not  for  conquest 
but  for  dear  life,  as  retreat  was  rendered  impossible  in  con- 
sequence of  the  parting  of  the  grapplings,  which  had  fast- 
ened their  craft  alongside  of  ours  j  escape  w  "  ~~nfore  out 
of  the  question. 


196  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Now,  then,  men,  follow  me  and  drive  the  savages  over- 
board !"  shouted  the  first  lieutenant,  flourishing  his  cutlass 
and  jumping  down  into  the  waist  of  the  vessel. 

So  furious,  however,  was  the  onset  made  upon  him  that 
he  was  thrown  back  with  the  foremost  of  those  who  fol- 
lowed him,  and  about  twenty  of  the  pirates  leaped  after 
him,  yelling  like  demons. 

"By  G — ,  this  will  never  do,  we  must  bring  one  of  the 
guns  to  bear  upon  them/'  said  Deadeye. 

"  Round  with  a  carronade,  my  boys,  and  pitch  slap  into 
them ;"  but  the  order  was  unnecessary,  for,  on  seeing  the 
first  lieutenant  go  down,  Hamilton,  with  a  party  of  marines, 
had  rushed  to  his  assistance.  He  was  fortunately  unhurt, 
and  was  up  again  in  an  instant,  laying  about  him  with  a 
hearty  good  will,  and  setting  an  example  which  was  fol- 
lowed with  such  effect  that  the  ruffians  began  to  give  way  ; 
nearly  one-half  of  them  were  cut  to  pieces  on  the  deck 
where  they  stood,  and  the  remainder  leaped  overboard, 
where  those  who  did  not  perish  in  the  sea  gained  a  tempo- 
rary safety  by  swimming  to  their  boats,  which  had  already 
drifted  to  some  distance. 

The  events  I  have  thus  been  endeavoring  to  describe, 
took  place  in  the  course  of  a  few  minutes.  The  bodies  of 
the  slain  were  thrown  overboard,  the  guns  were  secured, 
and  when  day  at  last  broke,  it  dawned  upon  decks  which 
were  slippery  with  human  gore.  The  wind  and  sea  abated 
considerably  ;  and  when  the  crew  were  mustered,  it  was 
found  that,  although  there  had  been  no  loss  of  life,  eleven 
of  them  were  so  severely  wounded  as  to  require  surgical 
assistance. 

Such  was  my  first  adventure,  causing  me  at  the  time 
many  profound  reflections  which  I  cannot  now  stay  to 
enumerate.  Eight  bells  in  the  morning  watch  had  struck 
when  we  piped  to  breakfast,  to  which  we  did  ample  justice. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  191 

The  first  lieutenant,  shortly  after  we  were  seated,  made  his 
appearance  with  his  arm  in  a  sling. 

" Hallo  !  old  fellow,  what's  the  matter?"  inquired  Ham- 
ilton, on  seeing  him  enter. 

"  Only  a  mere  scratch — nothing  more — been  having  some 
sticking-plaster  put  upon  it." 

"Well,  the  impudence  of  these  fellows  is  beyond  every- 
thing— to  attempt  to  board  a  British  man-of-war  is  a  cool 
trick  certainly,  ain't  it  ?" 

"  Old  Deadeye  is  blaspheming  awfully ;  he  has  got  a  bul- 
let hole  slap  through  the  crown  of  his  hat,"  Morris  said. 

"  The  devil  he  has  !  pity  his  coat  tails  hadn't  been  shot 
away  into  the  bargain,"  said  a  midshipman. 

"  They  certainly  did  fight  like  devils.  I  wish  we  had  taken 
a  prisoner  or  two." 

"My  eye,  if  we  had !  wouldn't  Deadeye  have  given  them 
a  high  hanging  ?"  said  the  middy. 

"  He'd  have  flogged  him  first  and  hanged  him  afterwards." 

"Would  his  blood  be  the  same  color  as  his  skin,  I  won- 
der ?"  inquired  the  middy,  who  seemed  to  have  a  turn  for 
philosophical  investigations. 

The  whole  of  the  party  burst  out  into  a  loud  roar  of 
laughter  at  this  sally. 

"I  should  like  to  have  had  a  cast  of  that  black  ruffian's 
head  who  was  the  leader  of  the  gang ;  he  seemed  one  of  the 
finest  animals  I  ever  saw,"  said  Dr.  Colocynth,  who  had 
just  entered  and  taken  his  seat  at  the  breakfast-table. 

"Why,  you  look  fagged — and  little  wonder,"  he  added. 

"  My  arm  is  still  painful,"  replied  the  first  lieutenant. 

"Take  some  breakfast,  then,  and  turn  in  ;  I'll  make  you 
a  cooling  lotion  to  put  upon  it.  No  fever,  eh  ?"  said  the 
medico,  slightly  touching  with  his  forefinger  the  wrist  of 
the  first  lieutenant. 

"Not  a  bit  of  fever — as  hot  as  the  devil  though  ;  some 


198  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

fellow  gave  me  a  confounded  crack  on  the  head  when  I  was 
down." 

"Oh,  wasn't  it  nearly  all  up  with  you  then ?"  said  Staun- 
ton,  who  was  a  bit  of  a  wag  in  his  way. 

"I  took  good  care  of  you  with  my  marines,  didn't  I,  my 
boy?"  said  Hamilton.  "By  Jove!  the  daring  of  these  fel- 
lows surprises  me." 

"They  took-us  for  a  merchantman  at  first,  and  thought 
they  would  easily  run  aboard  of  us  ;  then,  when  we  showed 
our  teeth,  their  blood  was  up,  and  they  wouldn't  draw  off." 

"Well,  not  many  of  them  have  lived  to  tell  the  story." 

"I  rather  imagine  not,"  replied  Staunton. 

"Do  they  often  try  that  sort  of  thing  in  these  latitudes?" 

"Yes;  frequently  upon  merchant  vessels  and  cruisers, 
when  they  have  a  chance  of  success  in  shot." 

"  But  seldom  or  never  upon  men-of-war." 

"There  have  been  instances,  but  they  are  of  rare  occur- 
rence." 

Having  dispatched  my  breakfast,  I  went  on  deck.  It 
was  one  of  those  days  when  a  general  lassitude  prevails. 
The  ocean  calmly  sleeps,  as  if  it  were  wearied — its  broad 
expanse  reflecting  the  heaven  above,  from  which  it  receives 
its  intensity  of  blue.  The  turtle  rolls  lazily  along;  and 
the  sea  is  undisturbed  by  even  a  breath  of  air,  the  surface 
looking  like  a  smooth  and  varnished  mirror.  The  decks 
had  been  cleared  and  set  to  rights,  and  the  men  were  loung- 
ing about  or  chatting,  in  twos  and  threes,  upon  the  subject 
of  our  recent  encounter.  A  light  breeze  at  last  sprung  up 
from  the  eastward ;  once  more  a  ripple  disturbed  the  face 
of  the  ocean  ;  and,  creeping  from  her  enthralment,  the  Ida 
got  into  the  sea  breeze  and  swept  with  crowded  canvas 
towards  her  destination. 

"  Sail  ahoy  I"  was  the  cry  from  the  fore-top-mast-head  of 
H.M.S.  Ida,  on  the  early  morning  of  what  promised  to  turn 


I 
FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  199 

out  a  remarkably  fine  day.  The  signal  midshipman,  having 
brought  his  glass  to  bear  upon  the  object  which  hove  in 
sight,  was  struck  with  admiration.  The  vessel  which  ap- 
proached us  was  a  splendid  one ;  and  a  square  blue  flag, 
which  flew  at  her  fore-top-gallant-mast-head,  indicated  she 
had  the  admiral  on  board.  We  exchanged  the  salutes 
usual  on  such  occasions,  and  proceeded  to  follow  the  move- 
ments of  our  superior  in  command,  The  weather  was  misty, 
and  it  began  to  blow  from  the  south-west  as  we  bowled 
along ;  towards  evening  it  settled  down  into  a  species  of 
weather  which  was  decidedly  uncomfortable — the  wind,  to 
use  the  phrase  of  one  of  the  sailors,  having  been  engaged  in 
knocking  in  heaps  about  the  deck,  so  that  nearly  every  ten 
minutes  we  were  obliged  to  turn  the  sails  to  some  light  air 
from  a  fresh  direction. 

"  Why,"  said  the  first  lieutenant,  "  the  wind  seems  to  be 
blowing  from  all  points  of  the  compass  at  once  ;  a  man  might 
be  many  a  year  at  sea,  and  never  meet  with  the  like  of  this." 

"  Oh  !"  replied  the  master,  "  that's  nothing  to  a  gale  I 
encountered  off  the  coast  of  France,  when  I  was  in  the  brig 
Niobe.  It  had  been  as  bright  a  summer's  day  as  ever  shone, 
when  about  four  bells  in  the  afternoon  watch,  a  breeze 
sprung  up  from  thirty  points  of  the  compass  all  at  once  ; 
you  may  be  surprised,  but  it  is  as  true  as  gospel,  they  lifted 
us  all  nearly  out  of  the  water  ;  some  of  us  thought  we  were 
going  up  to  heaven,  and  perhaps  a  few  were  nearer  it  at  that 
time  than  they  have  ever  been,  either  before  or  since,  but  we 
were  astray  in  our  reckoning,  enough  of  the  Niobe  remained 
afloat  to  hold  on  by,  and  off  we  went  at  the  rate  of  twenty 
miles  through  the  water." 

"  Why,  Mr.  Scott,"  said  I,  "  you  don't  mean  to  assert 
that  to  be  a  fact  ?" 

"  He  is  the  most  infernal  liar  that  ever  was  born,"  whis- 
pered Morris,  in  my  ear. 


I 
200  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Fact,  I  will  take  my  oath  to  it  this  blessed  moment,  by 
I  will,"  replied  the  master,  who  had  a  shrewd  idea 


that  the  whisper  meant  to  impugn  the  accuracy  of  his  state- 
ment. 

"  Boy,  bring  my  Bible,"  he  said,  turning  to  the  cabin  boy 
who  stood  near. 

"  You  have  been  tearing  it  up  to  light  cigars  with,  sir, 
for  the  last  three  weeks." 

"  You  d — d  ass,  can't  you  bring  any  one  else's  Bible  and 
say  it's  mine  ?" 

The  boy  haying  departed  on  his  errand,  soon  returned  to 
say,  that  he  had  searched  everywhere  in  vain,  a  fact  which 
did  not  speak  very  highly  for  the  piety  of  H.M.S.  Ida  and 
her  crew. 

I  was  absurd  enough,  at  this  moment,  to  suggest,  that  if 
he  pleased  I  could  lend  him  mine  ;  however,  my  offer  was 
met  by  such  an  unusual  shout  of  laughter  as  did  not  encour- 
age me  to  repeat  it. 

"  Do  you  really  think  he'd  mind  an  oath  a  single  button, 
or  that  his  swearing  so  fast  would  make  it  one  bit  the  more 
veracious  ?"  said  Hamilton,  as  we  walked  away  together. 

Having  cast  anchor  off  the  coast,  which  we  neared  in  the 
course  of  the  afternoon,'  a  boat  was  manned  and  dispatched 
to  the  Admiral,  which  returned,  having  letter  bags,  and  sun- 
dry packages  of  newspapers,  &c.,  with  dispatches  for  the 
captain. 

I  received  some  letters  from  home,  which  gave  satisfac- 
tory accounts  of  my  friends  ;  having  read  them,  I  returned 
to  the  ward-room,  where  I  found  the  officer  who  had  arrived 
on  board  with  the  dispatches.  He  had  a  decanter  of  wine 
before  him  from  which  he  was  regaling  himself  by  copious 
libations,  while  a  little  crowd  of  my  messmates  had  flocked 
round,  and  were  literally  devouring  him  with  questions. 

"  Who  have  you  on  board  ;  any  of  the  old  set  ?" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  201 

"  Yes,  Skysail  and  Mildmay." 

"  Ah  !  Mildmay  is  afloat  again,  is  he  ?  how  does  he  get 
on?" 

"  Ah,  much  better  after  his  flogging." 

"  What  do  you  mean  ?"  said  Hamilton  ;  "  flog  a  midship- 
man !  I  never  heard  of  such  a  thing." 

"Why,  not  exactly  that  either,"  replied  the  dispatch 
bearer  ;  "  only  he  was  near  it,  which  comes  pretty  near  to 
the  same  thing  after  all." 

"  How  did  it  happen  ?  give  us  the  particulars." 

"  Why,  Mildmay  was  always  rather  too  fond  of  cheek, 
and  in  his  last  ship,  the  captain,  always  a  tartar,  would 
stand  no  more  of  his  impertinence,  so  one  day  he  was 
ordered  up  to  the  mast-head  to  cool  himself. 

"  '  Mast-head,  sir  I  what,  you  surely  don't  mean  that  ¥ 
said  Mildmay. 

"  '  Yes  I  do,  though,'  replied  the  captain,  '  and  stay  there 
too  until  you  have  my  permission  to  come  down  again.' 

"  l  Why,  sir,  upon  my  soul,  that's  too  hard,  now.' 

"  'Another  word,  and  you  remain  there  all  night.' 

"  '  Well,  now,  what  a  cursed  tyrant,'  whispered  Mildmay, 
as  he  reluctantly  ascended  the  rigging,  which  was  to  con- 
duct him  to  his  destination.  The  captain,  meanwhile,  went 
to  his  dinner  ;  an  hour  elapsed,  then  another ;  at  the  end  of 
the  third,  Mildmay  thought  the  captain  had  forgotten  him, 
and  feeling  tired  of  his  uncomfortable  situation,  he  descend- 
ed, and  stowed  himself  away  somewhere,  thinking  he  was 
safe  until  morning. 

"  When  the  captain  had  dined,  and  drank  his  allowance  of 
claret,  for  there  was  a  party  that  day,  he  requested  the 
first  lieutenant  to  see  to  the  culprit,  and  allow  him  to  come 
down. 

"  The  first  lieutenant  having  departed  to  execute  his  com- 
mission, soon  made  his  appearance,  with  the  astounding 

9* 


202  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

intelligence,  that  Mr.  Mildmay  was  not  to  be  found,  and 
hinted  the  probability  that  he  might  have  fallen  asleep  on 
his  perch  and  dropped  overboard. 

" '  The  infernal  young  villain,  no !  he's  too  wide  awake,7 
said  Captain  G — ;  'have  the  ship  searched,  and  fetch  him 
here  the  instant  he's  found/ 

"It  was  not  long  before  the  first  lieutenant  returned, 
bringing  with  him  the  object  of  his  search,  who  looked  not 
one  whit  abashed  by  the  enormity  of  his  conduct. 

"  '  How  dare  you,  sir,  come  down  without  my  permis- 
sion V 

"  1 1  have  had  a  severe  cold  for  some  days  upon  me,  and 
I  really  thought  that  further  exposure  would  endanger  my 
life,'  replied  Mildmay,  with  unabashed  effrontery. 

" '  By  G — ,  I'll  warm  you.  Howard,  desire  the  boat- 
swain's mate  to  fetch  his  cat  here,  and  a  quarter-master  to 
bring  the  seizings.' 

"  Mildmay  was  in  a  devil  of  a  funk  ;  the  stern  countenance 
of  the  captain  showed  he  was  not  in  a  humor  to  be  trifled 
with — so  he  held  his  tongue,  and  looked  at  the  company 
assembled  at  table,  hoping  that  some  of  them  (for  his  ready 
wit  had  made  him  a  great  favorite)  would  interfere  in  his 
behalf. 

"  The  ministers  of  justice  made  their  appearance;  the  boat- 
swain's mate  carried  a  red  bag,  in  which  was  the  instrument 
of  justice,  and  the  quarter-master  carried  the  seizings. 

"  '  Fasten  this  young  gentleman  to  the  breach  of  the  gun, 
quarter-master.' 

"  '  Will  you  be  good  enough  to  let  me  know  one  thing, 
sir,'  said  Mildmay,  '  before  you  punish  me.' 

"  '  Yes,  sir  ;  what  is  it  ?  No  more  impertinence,  or  I'll 
flog  the  seven  senses  out  of  you.' 

" '  Are  you  justified  in  punishing  an  officer  in  this  way 
without  a  court-martial  ?' 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  203 

" '  Tie  him  up,  quarter-master/  roared  the  captain,  in  a 
voice  of  thuuder. 

"  Mildmay  was  now  tied  up,  and  every  arrangement  made 
preparatory  to  punishment. 

"  *  Sir/  said  he,  '  I  wish  to  say  one  word  to  you  before 
you  begin/ 

"  l  What  have  you  to  say  V 

"  '  Only  this  :  that  I  consider  your  conduct  ungentle- 
manly  in  the  extreme.' 

"  '  Do  your  duty,  boatswain's  mate/  said  the  captain ; 
'give  him  a  dozen  to  begin  with.' 

"  The  boatswain's  mate,  a  brawny  fellow,  with  thews  and 
sinews  like  a  giant,  gave  one  swoop  with  his  cat,  and  down 
it  came,  with  a  ringing  crack,  upon  the  poor  midshipman. 

"  '  Now,  sir,'  said  the  captain,  '  what  do  you  think  of  it? 
are  you  sorry  for  your  conduct  V 

"  '  Yes,  sir,  extremely  sorry,'  whimpered  the  culprit. 

"'Will  you  pledge  me  your  honor,  as  an  officer  and  a 
gentleman,  that  you'll  obey  orders  in  future,  and  be  guilty 
of  no  further  impertinence  ¥ 

"  *  I  will,  sir ;  I  pledge  my  honor/ 

"  '  On  that  condition,  then,  I'll  let  you  off/  said  the  cap- 
tain ;  '  but,  remember,  I'm  not  to  be  trifled  with.  Cast  him 
off,  quarter-master — and  mind,  sir,  let  me  see  your  face  as 
seldom  as  possible  for  some  time  to  come.' 

"  '  No,  nor  any  other  part  of  me,  if  I  can  help,'  replied 
Mildmay,  buttoning  up  his  dress  and  retreating  with  con- 
siderable precipitation.' 

"  Confound  the  fellow  !  now  I  call  that  really  too  bad/' 
said  Hamilton  ;  "I  hope  we've  not  got  him  out  here." 

"  No,  I  believe  he  did  some  other  things,  which  did  not 
bring  him  into  the  list  of  advance  at  the  Admiralty;  so 
they  have  let  him  lie  by  for  a  little ;  at  all  events,  he  has  no 
command  in  this  expedition." 


204  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  The  devil  mend  him  !  I  should  not  like  to  sail  with  such 
a  beast." 

"  What  sort  of  a  fellow  is  old  Deadeye  V9 

"  Oh  !  a  regular  trump,  but  one  of  the  old  school — bores 
you  a  little — he's  so  d — d  particular." 

"  I  hate  your  particular  people  ;  but  I  must  be  off  now. 
Will  you  see  if  there's  anything  for  me  to  take  back  ?"  said 
the  envoy,  who,  with  a  little  assistance,  had  finished  nearly 
the  whole  of  a  decanter  of  sherry. 

When  I  went  on  deck,  it  had  come  on  to  blow,  the 
courses  were  clewed  up,  and  the  men  were  aloft  furling  the 
top-gallant  sails.  The  wind,  which  had  shifted  several 
points  to  the  northward,  was  rapidly  rising  to  a  gale,  and 
the  sea  had  risen.  A  little  band  of  my  messmates  I  found 
discussing  the  news,  and  talking  of  the  story  they  had  just 
heard.  But  it  is  time  for  me  to  turn  from  these  private  and 
unimportant  squabbles,  to  those  in  which  nations  were  en- 
gaged. 


CHAPTER    VI. 

CHINA.  » 

IT  was,  as  all  the  world  I  suppose  is  aware,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  unjustifiable  conduct  of  Commissioner  Lin, 
the  imprisonment  of  Her  Majesty's  Plenipotentiary,  and 
other  English  subjects,  with  many  acts  of  violence  by  which 
his  reign  was  marked,  that  called  for  stringent  measures  on 
our  part.  The  Court  of  Directors  of  the  East  India  Com- 
pany, as  well  as  the  British  Government,  had  a  common 
object  to  protect  our  trade  and  our  subjects  in  China,  as 
well  as  to  demand  reparation  for  the  insults  offered  to  the 
person  of  our  representative.  I  don't  pretend  to  an  accu- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  205 

rate  knowledge  of  the  particulars  of  the  original  dispute. 
The  quarrel,  as  it  stood,  was  a  very  pretty  one — and  the 
expedition  of  which  we  formed  part,  had  been  fitted  out  for 
the  purpose  of  bringing  the  Chinamen  to  their  senses.  Sir 
W.  Parker  commanded  it,  and  Sir  Henry  Pottinger  went 
as  Plenipotentiary,  with  full  power  to  negotiate  any  satis- 
factory arrangement  that  could  be  adopted,  so  as  to  avoid, 
if  possible,  the  commencement  of  hostilities.  But  as  it  was 
not  expected,  from  the  temper  and  tone  of  recent  commu- 
nications, that  a  pacific  arrangement  would  be  practicable, 
and  the  scene  of  operations  would  necessarily  be  in  rivers 
and  along  the  coasts,  attention  had  been  directed  to  the 
fitting  out  of  armed  vessels  especially  adapted  for  that  par- 
ticular branch  of  the  service.  The  practicability  of  using 
iron  as  a  material  for  ship-building  had  long  been  evident ; 
the  opportunity  was  considered  a  favorable  one  for  testing 
its  superiority  in  the  species  of  service  upon  which  we  were 
engaged ;  and,  although  some  frigates  and  sail  of  the  line 
formed  a  portion  of  the  expedition,  it  was  for  the  most  part 
composed  of  strong-built  iron  steamers,  constructed  with 
reference  to  their  employment  in  river  navigation.  In 
fitting  them  out  adequately  for  this  peculiar  service,  no 
expense  had  been  spared.  The  line  had  never  yet  been 
crossed  by  an  iron  steamer.  There  was  much  doubt,  there- 
fore, as  to  their  capability  of  weathering  the  rough  sea 
about  southern  Africa.  A  variety  of  questions  respecting 
the  effect  of  lightning,  the  errors  of  the  compass  in  or  upon 
vessels  of  this  description,  as  well  as  the  other  great  phe- 
nomena of  nature  which  are  incident  to  voyages  in  tropical 
climates,  had  been  satisfactorily  solved  by  the  perfect  suc- 
cess of  the  expedition.  It  now  only  remained  to  be  seen 
how  the  steamers  would  stand  the  river  service.  The  Ne- 
mesis, although  commanded  principally  by  officers  of  the 
Royal  Navy,  had  been  sent  to  sea  as  a  merchant  steamer — 


206  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

and  so  profound  a  secret  had  her  equipment  and  destina- 
tion, as  well  as  those  of  the  remainder  of  her  companions, 
been  kept,  that  it  was  not,  as  I  have  already  intimated, 
until  very  recently,  that  the  whole  extent  of  our  mission  had 
transpired. 

The  Nemesis,  which  was  destined  to  play  a  conspicuous 
part  in  the  subsequent  events,  was  about  seven  hundred 
tons  in  burthen.  She  was  one  hundred  and  eighty-four  feet 
in  length,  and  in  breadth  about  twenty-nine  feet ;  her  en- 
gines were  of  one  hundred  and  twenty  horse  power  ;  she  had 
twelve  days'  supply  of  coals,  with  water  and  provisions  for 
four  months,  and  stores  of  all  descriptions,  together  with  a 
duplicate  set  of  machinery  in  case  any  accident  should 
occur.  Her  ordinary  draught  of  water  was  little  more  than 
six  feet,  but  commonly  in  actual  service  she  did  not  draw 
more  than  five.  She  had  no  keel  and  was  perfectly  flat- 
bottomed,  but  for  the  purpose  of  obviating  as  far  as  it  was 
possible  these  disadvantages  of  her  construction,  she  had 
two  movable  keels,  capable  of  being  raised  or  lowered  to 
the  depth  of  five  feet  below  the  bottom  of  the  vessel.  Each 
of  these  was  about  seven  feet  in  length,  one  placed  before 
and  the  other  after  the  engine  room.  They  were  inclosed 
in  a  narrow  case  a  foot  wide,  which,  being  open  underneath, 
allowed  the  water  to  rise  to  the  level  of  the  sea  on  the  out- 
side. The  entire  length  of  the  vessel  was  divided  into  seven 
compartments,  which  were  water-tight,  by  means  of  iron 
bulk-heads,  so  that  in  case  of  any  accident,  such  as  striking 
upon  a  rock,  or  a  shot  hole,  the  effect  upon  the  compart- 
ment where  it  should  occur  would  not  be  attended  with 
any  dangerous  result  to  the  remainder  of  the  vessel.  I 
have  thus  been  particular  in  the  description  of  the  vessel,  as 
it  may  serve  to  illustrate  the  tenor  of  her  subsequent  opera- 
tions. 

The  weather  for  some  days  proved  boisterous  and  squally, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          207 

but  at  length  we  arrived  at  Hong-Kong,  and  from  that  time 
every  possible  exertion  was  made  for  sailing  northward. 
Many  of  the  ships  had  troops  on  board.  After  knocking 
about  the  harbor  for  some  days,  we  were  delighted  to  see 
the  Nemesis  hoist  the  signal  for  starting.  It  was  a  welcome 
one  to  us.  We  should  otherwise  have  been  long  in  getting 
to  our  position  in  the  fleet,  whereas  in  a  few  hours  we  were 
towed  up  on  their  left  to  make  the  best  of  our  way.  A 
signal  made  Chappel  Island  our  place  of  rendezvous.  The 
breeze  was  fine  and  favorable,  and  we  ran  into  the  harbor 
of  Amoy  on  the  evening  of  the  25th  of  August,  in  the  year 
of  our  Lord  1841.  Several  shots  were  fired  at  us  from  the 
batteries  as  we  entered,  none  of  which,  however,  did  the 
smallest  mischief.  The  fleet  was  formed  into  three  divi- 
sions ;  the  centre  being  under  the  command  of  Captain 
Herbert,  in  the  Blenheim,  assisted  by  Commander  Clarke 
of  the  Columbine  ;  the  starboard  division  was  under  Cap- 
tain Bourabier  of  the  Blonde,  assisted  by  the  Cruiser  ; 
while  the  second  division  was  placed  under  the  direction  of 
Captain  Smith  of  the  Druid,  assisted  by  Commander  Anson 
of  the  Pylades.  It  was  directed  that  a  boat  should  be  in 
constant  readiness  on  board  of  each  transport,  for  the  pur- 
pose of  towing  the  ships  clear  of  each  other  in  case  of  a 
calm,  and  orders  were  given,  that  no  boat  should  be  per- 
mitted to  pass  from  one  ship  to  another,  without  permis- 
sion from  the  senior  in  command  of  the  division. 

The  whole  armament  was  composed  of  thirty-six  sail,  and, 
unless  I  am  greatly  mistaken,  the  very  sight  must  have 
caused  the  Chinamen  to  quake  in  their  little  wooden  shoes. 
There  were  two  line-of-battle  ships  and  seven  other  ships 
of  war,  namely,  the  Modeste,  the  Druid,  the  Columbine, 
Blonde,  Pylades,  Cruiser,  and  Algerine.  There  was  the 
Rattlesnake  troop  ship  and  the  Bentinck  surveying  vessel ; 
four  steamers,  belonging  to  the  East  India  Company,  the 


208  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Queen,  the  Phlegethon,  the  Nemesis,  and  the  Sesostris,  be- 
sides twenty-one  hired  transports  and  store-ships,  most  of 
them  of  large  size,  many  of  considerably  more  than  a  thou- 
sand tons  burthen ;  while  the  force  stationed  in  the  vicinity 
of  the  Canton  river  was  composed  of  six  vessels  of  war,  in- 
cluding the  Herald  and  Alligator,  the  whole  under  the 
direction  of  that  able  seaman  and  efficient  officer  Captain 
Nias. 

The  sun  had  risen  in  bright  unclouded  splendor  as  we 
entered  the  harbor.  It  was  a  proud  sight.  The  wooden 
walls  of  England,  which  had  braved  so  many  a  year  the 
battle  fire  and  wreck,  were  here  in  all  their  glory,  so  many 
thousand  miles  away  from  home,  ready  to  strike  terror  into 
the  heart  of  the  foe.  The  bright  clear  sea  speaking  fresh- 
ness to  the  heart  was  just  rippled  by  a  gentle  breeze.  At 
a  short  distance  beneath  our  weather-beam,  with  the  early 
beams  of  morning  glinting  fr»  >m  her  bristling  sides,  her  lofty 
masts  and  superb  hull,  sailed  the  magnificent  Blenheim,  like 
a  lion  moving  in  all  the  majesty  of  conscious  power.  The 
batteries  frowned  upon  us  with  awful  sternness,  but  as  yet 
their  iron  mouths  were  silent.  Before,  however,  I  go  fur- 
ther, dear  reader,  I  must  inflict  upon  you  a  little  bit  of 
description,  which  is  absolutely  necessary  to  enable  you  to 
understand  the  difficulties  surrounding  the  scene  of  action. 
The  harbor  which  we  were  entering  is  situated  in  the  south- 
eastern district  of  the  island  of  Amoy,  which,  with  another 
known  by  the  barbarous  appellation  of  Quency,  occupy  a 
considerable  portion  of  a  large  bay  studded  with  many  sim- 
ilar islands.  The  most  remarkable  of  these,  as  having 
direct  reference  to  the  subject  of  my  description,  is  Kolingso, 
which  is  only  divided  from  Amoy  by  a  narrow  passage  lead- 
ing directly  up  to  the  harbor.  This  island  is,  as  it  were,  the 
key  to  the  whole  position.  The  scenery  by  which  the  town 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  209 

was  surrounded  is  very  striking — high  mountains,  some  of 
them  wooded,  slope  away  in  the  distance,  and  large  rivers 
coming  from  the  heart  of  the  country,  discharge  their 
waters  into  the  bay.  The  town  appeared  about  ten  miles 
in  circumference  ;  it  is  concealed  by  fortified  heights.  The 
suburbs,  which  were  extensive,  appeared  separated  from  the 
inner  town  by  a  line  of  rocky  hills,  which  extended  trans- 
versely down  to  the  sea  along  the  face  of  the  outer  town, 
or  what  may  be  called  the  outer  harbor,  which  extended 
along  the  front  and  formed  a  large  estuary  that  ran  deep 
into  the  island  across  its  centre,  and  skirted  the  northern 
side  of  the  city.  The  whole  front  of  the  city  is  there 
washed  by  the  sea ;  the  walls  appeared  strongly  built  and 
castellated  at  the  top.  Immense  forts  and  field-works  had 
been  erected  on  the  heights  which  commanded  the  town,  as 
well  as  upon  the  smaller  islands  by  which  the  harbor  is 
studded.  We  could  see  at  a  glance  that  extensive  prepa- 
rations had  been  made  to  give  us  a  warm  reception  ;  a  line 
of  guns  for  nearly  a  mile  in  length  bristled  from  a  long 
stone  battery,  faced  with  turf,  which  stretched  right  in  front 
of  the  town. 

The  small  island  of  Koliugso,  which  stood  directly  in 
our  course,  the  passage  between  it  and  the  town  being  not 
more  than  six  hundred  yards  across,  seemed  likely  to  op- 
pose a  formidable  impediment.  It  was  literally  bristling 
with  heavy  cannon. 

Such  was  the  position  of  affairs  when  we  sailed  into  the 
harbor  under  the  influence  of  a  favorable  wind.  Every- 
thing was  in  readiness.  The  captains,  who  had  gone  on 
board  of  the  Admiral  for  instructions,  had  returned  to 
their  respective  ships.  The  gigantic  Nemesis,  with  her 
smoky  companions,  were  engaged  in  letting  off  their  super- 
fluous steam,  and  every  soul  on  board  was  anxiously  await- 


210  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

ing  the  expected  signal  for  the  commencement  of  operations, 
when  a  small  boat  was  observed  putting  off  from  the  shore 
bearing  a  flag  of  truce. 

"  I'm  blowed  if  they  ain't  a-going  to  strike  sail  after  all," 
said  an  old  quarter-master  who  stood  near  me. 

"  We  shall  have  all  our  trouble  for  nothing  then,  that's 
all  about  it,"  said  Hamilton. 

"  It's  the  old  story  of  the  King  of  France  with  his  sixty 
thousand  men,"  interrupted  Staunton,  who  was  looked  upon, 
as  I  have  already  intimated,  as  the  wit  of  the  mess. 

"Watch  old  Deadeye,  how  he's  twitching  his  empty 
sleeve  about."  (I  forget  whether  I  mentioned  that  our 
captain  had  lost  his  left  arm  at  the  battle  of  Trafalgar.) 

"  Maybe  he's  not  angry ;  he  thinks  there's  going  to  be 
no  fighting  after  all." 

By  this  time  the  boat  containing  the  flag  of  truce  had 
gone  on  board  of  the  Admiral,  and  it  soon  became  known 
that  the  object  of  the  embassage  was  simply  to  inquire 
what  were  the  intentions  of  our  squadron.  It  soon  trans- 
pired, also,  that  an  answer  had  been  returned,  which  was 
calculated  to  allay  the  apprehensions  of  all  fire-eaters.  In 
the  name  of  her  Majesty,  it  was  requested  that  certain  very 
stringent  demands  which,  in  the  preceding  year,  had  been 
made  by  Captain  Elliott,  should,  without  further  delay,  be 
complied  with  ;  or  that,  in  case  of  refusal,  hostilities  would 
instantly  commence  ;  but  as  the  commanders  of  the  expedi- 
tion would  willingly  spare  the  effusion  of  blood,  which  other- 
wise must  necessarily  ensue,  they  were  willing  to  allow  all 
the  troops  in  the  town  to  retire  with  their  arms  and  bag- 
gage, on  condition  that  the  fortifications  should  at  once  be 
abandoned,  and  the  town  of  Amoy  delivered  over  into  the 
possession  of  the  British  troops.  In  case  this  very  reason- 
able demand  was  not  complied  with,  the  refusal  on  the  part 
of  the  Chinese  authorities,  it  was  politely  requested,  should 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  211 

be  notified  by  .the  erection  of  a  white  flag  upon  the  cit- 
adel. 

The  morning  was  oppressively  warm  as  we  lay  for  two 
mortal  hours  exposed  to  the  full  glare  of  a  meridian  sun, 
waiting  to  see  whether  the  Chinese  would  make  up  their 
minds  to  be  cannonaded  or  not.  At  length,  more  than  two 
mortal  hours  having  elapsed,  during  which  the  men  exhibit- 
ed symptoms  of  the  greatest  impatience,  we  observed  the 
Admiral  hoist  the  signal  for  the  commencement  of  the  at- 
tack. It  was  a  magnificent  sight  to  see  how  beautifully 
the  ships  stood  in  defying  the  batteries  which  frowned  so 
awfully  upon  them.  The  Sesostris  led  the  van,  the  Welles- 
ley  and  the  Blenheim  followed,  but  did  not  fire  a  shot  until 
they  were  within  less  than  four  hundred  yards  from  the 
principal  battery ;  but  as  the  attack  deserves  a  chapter  for 
itself,  I  shall  reserve  my  description  for  the  next. 


CHAPTER    YII. 
THE    BATTLE    OF    AMOY. 

IN  the  course  of  a  few  minutes  the  Ida  had  taken  up  her 
appointed  station.  The  Blonde,  Druid  and  Modeste  came 
to — close  by  the  works  of  Kolingso  ;  and  we  were  soon  hotly 
engaged.  The  roar  of  the  artillery  was  tremendous.  The 
Chinese  worked  their  guns  well,  but  not  expecting  in  all 
probability  we  would  come  quite  so  near  to  them,  the  range 
was  too  high,  and  the  shot  for  some  time  flew  harmlessly 
over  us,  hurting  nothing  more  than  a  spar  or  a  sail ;  this 
error  was,  however,  soon  rectified. 

"  Hallo,  Bill  1  we  want  more  shot  here,"  shouted  one  of 
the  men  who  was  working  a  gun. 

"Ay,  ay,  you  shall  have  it." 


212  SWELL  LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  D — n  it,  let  them  have  it,"  shouted  Hamilton,  who  was 
standing  near. 

"Mr.  Hamilton,"  said  the  first  lieutenant,  with  a  solemn 
visage,  "  this  is  no  place  for  swearing ;  if  this  lasts  much 
longer,  you  may  be  in  another  world  soon." 

"  Hurrah  !  then,  go  it,  my  boys,  have  at  'em  with  a  will," 
shouted  my  valiant  messmate,  as  Bill  came  tumbling  up  the 
hatchway  with  two  large  canvas  bags  filled  with  rusty  iron, 
cannon  balls,  and  wads.  Most  of  my  messmates  had  taken 
off  their  neckcloths,  which  were  tied  round  their  waists  ; 
some  helped  the  men  to  work  the  guns.  As  for  myself, 
seeing  there  was  nothing  for  me  to  do,  I  stood  with  my 
hands  in  my  pockets — a  spectator  whose  only  concern  at 
that  moment,  I  must  confess,  was,  whether  any  one  would 
soon  be  shot,  coupled  with  an  ardent  aspiration  that  the 
unfortunate  individual  might  be  any  other  than  myself.  As 
yet  there  had  been  no  harm  done,  and  I  was  beginning  to 
congratulate  myself  that  the  damage  was  likely  to  be  all 
on  one  side. 

Having  observed  some  men,  who  were  stationed  on  the 
forecastle,  cheering  heartily  to  their  comrades  below,  I 
walked  in  the  direction  to  see  what  was  going  on.  Nine 
men  were  stationed  there  with  the  first  lieutenant  at  their 
head.  They  seemed,  like  myself,  to  be  merely  lookers-on. 
The  long  guns,  which  belonged  more  properly  to  this  part 
of  the  deck,  had  in  consequence  of  their  extensive  range 
been  removed  to  another  position  which  afforded  more  space 
to  work  them. 

These  men,  I  soon  discovered,  were  stationed  at  their 
post  in  order  to  watch  and  repair  any  temporary  damages. 
They  had  as  yet  nothing  to  do  except  look  on  and  shout, 
which  they  seemed  doing  to  the  very  utmost  of  their  ability. 
They  were  equally  exposed  with  the  rest  of  us,  and  in  the 
absence  of  the  excitement  attendant  upon  physical  exertion 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  213 

and  hard  firing,  they  were  endeavoring  to  amuse  themselves 
by  encouraging  their  comrades. 

"  Hurrah  !  my  hearties,  pitch  it  into  them,"  said  one. 

"  A  little  bit  lower  ;  now  for  it !  there  goes  a  gun  knocked 
to  eternal  smash  1"  shouted  another. 

It  was  an  elderly  seaman  who  spoke,  and  just  as  he  had 
uttered  the  words  a  round  shot  came  tearing  along ;  the 
men  all  dodged  on  one  side  with  the  exception  of  the  last 
speaker,  whose  attention  had  been  so  much  occupied  by  see- 
ing the  Chinese  gun  knocked  to  eternal  smash  that  he  was 
placed  in  that  predicament  himself.  That  was  the  first 
blood  I  saw  drawn,  and  I  must  confess  that  when  I  saw 
the  form  which  a  minute  ago  had  been  all  life  and  anima- 
tion, stretched  on  the  deck  a  lifeless  mass  of  clay,  I  did  feel 
what  Mrs.  Harris,  had  that  worthy  lady  been  present, 
would  have  called  a  turn  ;  however,  the  rest  of  the  men 
took  no  notice  and  went  on  with  their  cheering  as  heartily 
as  ever. 

I  walked  away  and  rejoined  Hamilton,  who  was  standing 
by  the  bulwark  with  one  of  the  ropes  in  his  hand,  superin- 
tending the  working  of  a  gun.  I  had  scarcely  come  up 
when  a  round  shot  came  whistling  through  the  sides,  knock- 
ing bolts,  planks,  and  everything  else  before  it.  When  the 
crash  was  over  I  saw  Hamilton  was  down ;  I  ran  towards 
him,  but  he  was  unhurt ;  the  rope  upon  which  he  had  been 
leaning  was  cut  in  two  at  a  little  distance  from  his  hand, 
and  he  was  merely  knocked  down  and  a  little  stunned  by 
the  wind  of  the  shot. 

"  Close  shave  that,  by  Jove  I"  said  he,  rising  from  his 
recumbent  posture. 

The  firing  was  now  tremendous  ;  such  an  infernal  din  I 
certainly  never  heard  before,  nor  do  I  expect  to  hear  the 
like  again.  Our  guns  were,  however,  doing  their  work, 
while  the  batteries  to  which  we  were  opposed  were  rapidly 


214  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

becoming  dismantled  ;  and  the  men  gave  a  hearty  cheer  as 
they  saw  each  of  them  rendered  hors  de  combat.  In  the 
meantime  the  Blonde  and  Druid  had  not  been  idle.  The 
three  principal  batteries  on  the  island  of  Kolingso  were 
now  completely  silent,  and  a  party  of  marines  had  been 
landed  and  had  taken  possession  of  the  forts. 

"  They  say  poor  little  Mr. is  killed,  sir,"  said  one  of 

the  men,  coming  up  with  rather  a  rueful  expression  of  coun- 
tenance ;  "and  two  others  besides.  I  have  just  come  up 
from  below.  The  surgeon  says  there's  no  chance,  but  I 
can't  quite  learn  the  rights  of  it  yet." 

At  this  moment  Shaw  came  walking  forward  along  the 
gangway,  when  a  round  shot  from  the  batteries  struck  the 
hammock  netting,  tearing  out  the  feathers  and  blankets, 
and  hitting  Shaw  upon  that  portion  of  the  human  form 
which  for  some  wise  reason  it  is  considered  alike  indecorous 
to  turn  to  a  friend  or  to  an  enemy.  Over  went  the  short 
gentleman  like  a  ninepin,  but  the  force  of  the  ball  had  been 
nearly  expended  when  it  reached  the  ship,  and  the  yielding 
nature  of  the  fabric  through  which  it  had  to  pass  had  taken 
away  any  of  its  remaining  power  for  mischief. 

"  Well,  I  never  was  hit  there  in  my  time  before,"  said 
Shaw,  getting  up  and  rubbing  the  part  affected. 

"If  the  Chinamen  had  put  a  little  more  powder  into  that 
'ere  gun  I'd  have  felt  obliged  to  them,"  growled  a  seaman 
near  me  whom  Shaw  had  ordered  to  be  punished  a  few 
days  previously. 

When  I  returned  to  my  post  on  the  quarter-deck,  I  found 
some  of  my  messmates  who  had  supplied  the  place  of  the 
wounded  men  and  were  busily  engaged  in  working  a  gun. 
Old  Deadeye  was  all  alive  and  kicking,  superintending  the 
operations  and  working  his  empty  sleeve  about  as  if  it  was 
under  the  operation  of  galvanism. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  215 

"  D — n  them,  they'll  soon  have  had  enough  of  it ;  raise 
the  gun  a  little,  there.  Why  the  devil  don't  you  work, 
sir  ?"  he  said,  turning  upon  me  like  a  savage. 

"  So  I  will,  sir,  but  I  can  find  nothing  to  do." 

"Here,  then,  you  had  better  help  Hamilton  and  Ellis 
with  that  gun." 

"  Ha  1"  said  Ellis,  "Pm  glad  to  find  you  alive  and  hearty, 
my  buck,  kicking,  sir,  like  a  cover  on  a  copper  tea-kettle. 
What  the  devil  have  you  been  about  all  this  time  ?  So 
there,  a  little  aloft,"  he  said,  looking  along  the  sight  of 
the  gun  he  was  pointing. 

The  trigger  line  was  in  his  hand,  which  he  was  just  about 
to  pull,  when  crash  came  a  round  shot ;  in  an  instant  every 
man  of  us  was  floored,  the  port  hole  had  been  carried  away, 
the  tackles  shivered  to  pieces,  and  splinters  knocked  about 
in  all  directions.  One  of  them  had  hit  Ellis  in  both  arms, 
another  knocked  Hamilton  over,  while  I  received  a  nasty 
bruise  ou  the  hip  from  a  fragment  of  one  of  the  bolts. 

"Any  of  you  killed,  boys  ?"  said  old  Deadeye. 

"Not  so  bad  as  that,  sir,"  replied  Hamilton;  "  only  a 
little  frightened,  that's  all." 

"  Up  and  at  'em  again  ;  fire  out  the  gun  ;  we'll  have  the 
place  set  to  rights  presently." 

While  I  was  stooping  in  the  endeavor  to  execute  these 
orders,  I  heard  ^ie  whiz  and  crash  of  a  shot  overhead  ;  it 
only  carried  away  one  of  the  stanchions,  and  went  plump 
into  the  mast,  where  it  stood  out  like  an  enormous  pea. 

The  unpleasant  reflection  then  occurred  to  me,  and  it  was 
doubly  disagreeable  to  remember,  that  had  I  been  standing 
upright,  the  shot  must  have  gone  straight  through  me.  I 
felt  my  .courage  begin  to  ooze  a  little  through  my  fingers' 
ends,  but  the  glance  of  the  old  captain,  as  I  looked  up, 
revived  me. 


216  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Every  bullet  has  its  billet,  you  son  of  a  sea  cook  !"  he 
said  ;  "  that  was  meant  for  the  main  mast,  and  there  it  is, 
you  see." 

"  Hurrah,  hurrah,  my  boys  !  they  strike,  they  strike !" 
shouted  a  dozen  seamen  all  at  once,  as  forth  from  the  canopy 
of  smoke  which  shrouded  the  batteries,  out  of  which  red 
livid  glares  of  light  had  been  darting,  arose  into  the  calm, 
bright  summer  air  a  small  white  flag.  We  gave  three  hearty 
cheers  at  the  welcome  sight,  and  paused  to  rest  from  our 
labors. 

I  should  not  pass  over  in  silence  the  military  operations 
by  which  our  men  had  been  so  admirably  seconded  ;  it  will 
be  enough  briefly  to  dwell  upon  them. 

The  Phlegethon  and  Nemesis  had  been  brought  up  close 
alongside  the  shore,  with  the  troops  on  board,  and  a  num-» 
ber  of  boats  ready  for  their  disembarkation.  Under  cover 
of  our  fire  they  were  safely  landed,  under  the  inspection  of 
Commander  GHfford,  of  the  Cruiser  ;  a  small  outwork  upon 
a  hill  near  the  beach  having  been  escaladed,  the  British  flag 
was  placed  on  its  summit,  and  the  troops  then  advanced  to 
attack  the  town.  To  the  Eighteenth  Royal  Irish  was  as- 
signed the  honorable  duty  of  escalading  the  castellated 
walls  by  which  the  principal  battery  was  guarded,  which 
ran  along  the  hill-side  at  right  angles  to  the  march.  The 
Forty-ninth  Regiment  were  ordered  to  move  in  a  parallel 
direction  towards  the  lower  angle,  and  storm  its  embra- 
sures. 

As  the  parties  advanced,  each  upon  their  respective  ob- 
jects of  attack,  a  heavy  matchlock  fire  was  opened  upon 
them,  which,  in  consequence  of  the  exposed  nature  of  their 
situation,  did  considerable  mischief  Nothing  daunted,  how- 
ever, they  advanced,  with  three  hearty  cheers,  to  the  attack. 
Having  arrived  at  the  wall,  the  scanty  scaling  ladders  were 
found  a  serious  drawback.  They  were  obliged,  in  the  facQ 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  217 

of  a  heavy  fire,  to  mount  on  each  other's  shoulders  to 
gain  the  top  of  the  wall.  Captain  Hall  was  the  first  to 
make  good  his  footing,  and  having  cut  down  the  Chinese 
who  opposed  him  in  single  combat,  he  coolly  took  out  of 
his  pocket  a  small  flag,  which  he  had  carried  for  the  occa- 
sion, and  waved  it  in  token  of  triumph  ;  but  this  exhibition 
was  a  little  premature.  The  Chinese  still  continued  to 
make  a  stout  resistance,  but  the  storming  party  being 
joined  by  the  Eighteenth  Royal  Irish  and  the  Forty-ninth, 
who  had  also  forced  their  way  through  the  embrasures, 
formed  a  force  which  carried  everything  before  it. 

The  most  difficult  portion  had,  however,  yet  to  be  carried. 
This  was  a  steep  range  of  sentry  heights  which  commanded 
the  city.  Had  this  been  stoutly  defended,  the  loss  of  the 
attacking  party  would  have  been  most  severe.  It  was  here 
that  two  Chinese  officers  of  high  rank,  mounted  on  horse- 
back, made  a  determined  resistance.  The  leader  of  the 
storming  party,  conceiving  it  would  be  a  fine  opportunity 
for  making  a  prisoner  of  distinction,  made  a  dash  at  the 
foremost,  but  he  was  instantly  surrounded  by  the  body- 
guard of  the  mandarin.  A  few  of  our  soldiers  contrived  to 
penetrate,  and  now  a  hand-to-hand  encounter  took  place  of 
the  most  desperate  description.  The  Chinese  officer,  who 
wore  the  white  button,  was  a  tall  and  remarkably  athletic 
man.  Captain  Hall  singled  him  out,  and  after  a  sword 
fight  which  lasted  several  minutes,  the  mandarin  fell,  severely 
wounded  in  the  arm.  His  sword  was  taken  from  him, 
together  with  his  other  badges  of  distinction.  A  vigorous 
attempt  at  his  rescue  was  made  by  the  Chinese.  Our  party 
were  surrounded  and  nearly  cut  down  before  further  aid 
could  arrive.  Thus,  the  object  of  the  assailants  was  not  so 
much  the  defeat  of  the  enemy  as  the  rescue  of  their  prisoner, 
which  they  succeeded  at  last  in  accomplishing;  and  the 
mandarin,  who,  from  his  beinc:  the  subject  of  such  great 

l 


218  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

competition,  must  evidently  have  been  a  person  of  great 
consequence,  was  borne  off  in  triumph. 

The  attack  had  now  succeeded  ;  the  Chinese  were  in  full 
flight  in  every  direction,  closely  followed  by  a  body  of 
our  men,  which  had,  in  the  meantime,  been  thrown  ashore 
from  the  Wellesley,  under  Commander  Fletcher.  Upon 
going  within  the  battery,  many  of  the  Chinese  were  found 
dead,  but  the  wounded  had  nearly  all  contrived  to  make 
their  escape.  In  a  cavern  in  the  rocks  were  collected  a 
great  number  of  old  men,  women,  and  children,  who  had 
fled  there  for  shelter  from  the  shot.  They  set  up  a  piteous 
yelling,  being,  I  suppose,  in  the  full  expectation  of  having 
their  throats  cut  from  ear  to  ear,  as  it  is  the  policy  of  the 
Chinese  to  represent  us  in  the  most  unfavorable  light,  as 
cruel  persecutors  and  savages.  Many  Chinese  officers  of 
the  highest  rank  had  fallen  during  this  eventful  day — some 
of  them,  it  was  said,  by  their  own  hands.  The  Chinese 
commander,  seeing  all  was  lost,  walked  quietly  into  the 
water  until  it  covered  his  head,  and  remained  there  until  he 
died.  Such  was  the  battle  of  Amoy. 


CHAPTER    VIII. 
THE   DAY  AFTER  THE  BATTLE. 

BY  half-past  five  o'clock  the  action  was  at  an  end.  Par- 
tial firing  still  went  on  in  different  parts  of  the  navy  for 
some  hours,  but  the  general  cannonade  had  ceased  ;  and 
Captain  Deadeye,  after  seeing  that  every  precaution  had 
been  taken  for  the  safety  of  the  ship,  made  it  his  business  to 
visit  the  wounded  in  order  to  see  that  proper  attention  was 
paid  to  them. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  219 

I  went  down  below,  to  try  if  I  could  get  a  little  snooze, 
as  I  felt  greatly  fatigued  and  exhausted  from  long  exposure 
to  the  sun ;  a  drowsiness  came  over  me  which  I  could  hardly 
call  sleep.  Visions  of  the  battle  floated  before  me,  and 
phantoms  full  of  conflagrations  and  uproar,  mingled  with 
apparitions  of  .young  ladies,  filled  my  overheated  imagina- 
tion ;  then  the  scene  would  change,  and  I  would  find  myself 
once  more  among  the  pleasant  glades  and  green  fields  of  my 
own  country.  No  one,  perhaps,  who  has  not  mingled  in 
the  excitement  and  din  of  warfare,  can  imagine  the  feeling 
of  gentleness  and  tranquillity  which  is  connected  with  every 
vision  or  recollection  of  home.  I  had  spent  a  couple  of 
hours  or  so  in  this  species  of  somnolent  indulgence,  when  I 
was  awoke  by  the  noise  on  deck  caused  by  the  operations 
of  the  men  who  were  engaged  in  clearing  away  the  devasta- 
tion occasioned  by  the  Chinese  guns,  and  in  executing  the 
necessary  repairs. 

I  went  on  the  deck,  pausing  in  my  way  to  visit  the  cock- 
pit, which  was  filled  with  wounded  men  ;  there  the  surgeon 
was  hard  at  work,  with  his  coat  off  and  his  shirt  sleeves 
rolled  up  to  his  elbows.  He  looked  like  a  butcher  in  the 
shambles.  I  felt  a  sickness  of  heart  and  a  sensation  of 
faintness  come  over  me  which  were  quite  overpowering,  but 
as  I  turned  to  go,  I  heard  a  voice  feebly  articulate  my 
name  ;  it  was  that  of  the  old  coxswain,  who  had  been  badly 
wounded. 

"  Ah,  Pipes,  my  poor  fellow,  is  that  you  ?  How  are  you  ?" 
"  It's  all  up  with  me,  sir  ;  I'm  bound  for  Davy  Jones  this 
time." 

"  Cheer  up,  my  boy,  you'll  get  all  right  again." 
"  No,  sir,  no,"  the  old  man  said,  "  I'm  settled  at  last ; 
Death's  hard  aboard  of  me.     My  top-light  is  growing  dim  ; 
Fll  never  cross  the  line  no  more.    Let  me  have  your  hand 
for  a  moment,  sir." 


220  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

I  gave  him  my  hand,  and  as  I  looked  at  his  uneasy  and 
sunburnt  features,  over  which  the  salt  tears  were  rolling,  I 
felt  greatly  affected. 

"  I  han't  known  you  long,  sir  ;  this  is  our  first  cruise  to- 
gether, but  I  have  a  small  favor  which,  as  you  look  a  kindly 
gentleman,  I  hope  you'll  not  refuse  me." 

"What  is  it,  Pipes?  I'll  do  anything  you  want,  depend 
upon  me." 

"  See,  sir,  if  you  please,  that  the  d — d  old  gunner  don't 
make  me  chew  more  baccy  than  my  allowance  when  Fm 
shoved  off." 

"  I'll  take  care  of  that  for  you,  Pipes  ;"  although  for  the 
life  of  me  I  could  not,  at  that  time,  make  out  what  the 
poor  fellow  meant. 

"  I've  just  an  old  'oman,  sir,  too,  as  lives  near  Portslade, 
in  John  Street,  No.  10  ;  if  you  should  ever  happen  to  be 
down  that  way,  and  inquire  if  she's  got  my  pay  and  all 
that,  I'd  thank  you." 

"  You  may  depend  upon  me,  Pipes,  I'll  do  it." 

"  Thank'ee,  sir ;  I  expected  it  from  your  kindly  face. 
Here  I'm  a  sheer  hulk,  my  spar  gone,  never  to  answer  to 
my  helm  no  more.  I'll  never  see  Portslade  again,  nor  make 
auld  Beachy  in  a  misty  morning  ;  but  it's  all  the  same,  we 
must  go  when  our  time  comes." 

As  the  poor  fellow  uttered  these  words,  his  grasp  tight- 
ened, then  relaxed  ;  a  film  came  over  his  eyes ;  his  frame 
was  agitated  by  a  momentary  convulsion :  all  was  over. 
The  spirit  of  the  sailor  had  drifted  off,  from  the  troubled 
sea  of  human  misery  to  a  harbor  where  no  unquiet  waters 
ever  come. 

The  Chinese  batteries  still  continued  to  burn,  and  the 
discharge  at  intervals  of  their  heated  guns  sounded  like 
mournful  minute  guns  lamenting  the  devastation  which  had 
been  committed  during  the  day ;  while,  as  the  night  drew 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  221 

on,  a  gentle  breeze  arose,  which,  whistling  through  our  torn 
rigging,  seemed  to  sound  as  it  were  a  fitting  requiem  for  the 
spirit  which  had  passed  away. 

When  daylight  appeared  on  the  following  morning,  all 
hands  were  turned  up  to  clear  away  the  wreck.  Our  loss 
had  been  very  inconsiderable  ;  and  we  were  being  engaged 
in  knotting,  splicing,  cutting,  getting  up  new  rope,  and  stor- 
ing away  the  remnants  of  the  old  rigging,  when  a  voice  was 
heard  summoning  all  hands  on  deck ;  there  we  found  old 
Deadeye  with  the  other  officers  collected  in  a  cluster  around 
him.  He  addressed  us  in  a  short  speech,  praising  our  con- 
duct, and  complimenting  the  master  in  high  terms  for  the 
admirable  manner  in  which  he  had  brought  the  ship  along- 
side the  battery.  Our  names  were  then  called  over,  and  we 
piped  all  hands  to  breakfast. 

After  getting  our  vessel  refitted,  in  about  eight  days  we 
sailed  out  of  the  harbor  ;  the  rendezvous  appointed  for  the 
fleet  being  a  promontory,  called  the  Buffalo's  Nose,  which 
is  situated  near  to  the  entrance  of  the  Chusan  group  of 
islands.  Our  progress  was  at  first  rather  slow  in  conse- 
quence of  a  heavy  ground-swell  accompanied  by  light  winds, 
but  we  kept  pretty  close  in-shore,  and  so  continued  to  work 
our  way  notwithstanding  the  combination  of  adverse  circum- 
stances. 

When  we  cleared  the  harbor  it  had  been  fine  weather, 
but  towards  noon  it  began  to  blow.  We  were  coasting 
along  about  musket-shot  from  the  white  beach,  with  the 
clear  bright  green  sea  on  our  right,  and  beyond  it  the  dark 
waters  of  the  blue  and  stormy  ocean,  and  the  snow-white 
waving  surf  on  our  left  hand,  as  we  wore  to  the  breeze. 
There  was  the  beach  almost  level. with  the  water,  the  land 
was  covered  with  beautiful  white  sand  and  shells,  which 
glittered  transparently  along  the  surface.  The  north-east 
monsoon  now  began  to  set  in,  making  its  appearance  rather 


222  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

earlier  than  usual,  and  accompanied  by  heavy  squalls  and  a 
thick  spray,  which  caused  the  separation  of  our  squadron. 
At  the  commencement  of  this  change  of  weather,  old  Dead- 
eye  had  been  in  unusual  good-humor.  He  was  gratified  at 
the  conspicuous  position  the  Ida  had  occupied  in  the  recent 
action,  and  pleased  beyond  measure  at  his  name  having  been 
honorably  mentioned  in  the  dispatches.  Some  injuries  hav- 
ing, however,  been  sustained  by  the  spars,  which  had  oc- 
curred in  consequence  of  the  carelessness  of  one  or  two  of 
the  men,  the  captain  lost  his  temper,  and  swore  an  oath,  too 
awful  to  be  set  down  here,  that  upon  the  next  occasion  that 
such  an  accident  occurred,  he  would  make  a  severe  example 
of  the  offender.  Now,  Deadeye  was  by  no  means  the  man- 
ner of  man  to  be  trifled  with,  as  John  Handlead  soon  found 
to  his  cost.  Handlead  was  a  careless,  contumacious  sort 
of  fellow,  fond  of  discourse,  as  well  as  of  more  grog  than 
was  quite  good  for  him,  and  having  been  found  guilty  of 
repeated  acts  of  carelessness  and  disobedience  of  orders,  he 
was  ordered  up  for  punishment.  It  was  upon  a  certain 
Thursday — a  black  Thursday — the  men  were  mustered  at 
dinner ;  the  carpenters  having  been  previously  ordered  to 
rig  the  gratings,  which  were  accordingly  in  readiness.  The 
culprit  stands  upon  one  of  them,  to  which  his  feet  are  fast- 
ened, and  he  leans  against  the  other,  to  which  his  hands  are 
tied.  The  officers  are  assembled  in  gala  dress — all  the  ma- 
rines drawn  up  under  arms,  and  the  whole  of  the  ship's  com- 
pany mustered  on  the  opposite  side  of  the  deck.  The  mas- 
ter stood  near  the  gratings,  with  his  sword  in  his  hand.  I 
marvelled  much  at  this  wonderful  display  when  I  considered 
the  occasion  of  it,  and  I  expressed  my  wonderment  to  a 
messmate  who  stood  near,  when  the  only  reply  I  could  elicit 
was  that  of — 

"How  jolly  green  you  are  !" 

Green,  indeed,  I  may  have  been,  but  I  soon  turned  white. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  223 

The  arrangements  having  been  completed,  the  first  lieuten- 
ant went  below  to  report  to  the  captain,  who  speedily 
made  his  appearance  on  deck.  All  was  silent.  I  must 
confess  I  felt  a  more  anxious  trembling  about  the  nerves  in 
the  region  of  the  heart  than  I  did  when  we  were  going  into 
action. 

"John  Handlead,  stand  forward." 

Old  Deadeye,  in  his  calmest  of  moods,  was  seldom  free 
from  a  species  of  nervous  agitation,  nor  had  nature  gifted 
him  with  eloquence.  He  was  now  performing  a  duty  which 
he  evidently  did  not  like  nearly  so  much  as  blazing  away  at 
the  Chusan  batteries. 

"  John  Handlead,"  he  said,  "  I  am  really  sorry  to  see  you 
brought  up  here.  You  have  been  guilty  of  repeated  acts 
of  disobedience  to  orders.  You  have  neglected  your  du- 
ties— neglected  them  shamefully.  You  are  likely  to  become 
a  disgrace  to  the  profession  of  a  British  seaman.  Discipline 
is"  the  life  of  the  service — it  must  be  maintained ;  and  I 
should  be  neglecting  my  duty  if  I  did  not  punish  you  as  you 
deserve,  as  an  example  to  the  rest  of  the  ship's  company. 
Strip,  sir." 

John  Handlead  turned  a  quid  of  tobacco  which  he  had  in 
his  mouth,  coolly  squirted  the  juice  on  the  deck,  and  began 
deliberately  to  peel  himself. 

"Seize  him  up,"  said  the  captain. 

The  hands  of  the  prisoner  were  then  tied  to  the  upper 
grating,  and  his  feet  lashed  firmly  to  that  underneath. 

A  master-at-arms  then  threw  a  covering  over  his  shoul- 
ders, while  the  clerk  read  aloud  the  articles  of  war  relative 
to  the  punishment  of  any  seaman  who  should  be  found 
guilty  of  negligence  of  duty. 

This  being  done,  we  all  put  on  our  hats,  which  had  been 
taken  off  during  the  performance  of  this  portion  of  the 
drama. 


224  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Give  him  a  dozen,"  said  the  captain. 

The  boatswain's  mate,  a  large  athletic  fellow,  with  thews 
and  sinews  like  a  giant,  seized  his  cat.  The  handle  was 
about  two  feet  in  length,  covered  with  red  cloth.  The  tails 
of  this  weapon  were  nine  in  number,  each  of  them  about 
the  size  of  the  cord  used  for  fastening  a  portmanteau. 

The  mate,  who  handled  this  instrument  with  the  air,  of 
an  adept,  looked  at  it  from  top  to  bottom,  cleared  out  all 
the  tails  with  his  fingers,  and  held  out  the  mere  ends  in  his 
left  hand,  as  the  right  was  raised  to  inflict  the  lash.  He 
then  gave  his  arm  and  body  a  sudden  swing — the  tails 
whizzed  through  the  air,  and  as  they  came  down  upon  the 
naked  creeping  flesh,  and  I  saw  the  long  red  marks  im- 
printed upon  it,  a  deadly  sickness  overcame  me,  and  I  was 
obliged  to  lean  against  the  bulwark  for  support  When  I 
looked  up  again,  the  drops  of  blood  were  slowly  trickling 
down  the  prisoner's  back.  The  first  dozen  had  been  fin- 
ished, and  the  executioner  rested  from  his  labors,  looking 
for  further  orders  from  the  captain. 

"  John  Handlead,"  said  the  latter,  "  are  you  sorry  for 
your  offences — will  you  amend  in  future  IT 

"  D — n  you  for  a  lubber,"  grunted  the  seaman  from  be- 
tween his  clenched  teeth. 

"  What  does  he  say  ?"  said  old  Deadeye  ;  "  I  can't  hear 
him." 

"  That  he's  sorry,  I  believe,"  said  the  first  lieutenant, 
who  humanely  wished  to  hide  what  he  knew  would  be  the 
result. 

"  I  said,  d — n  you,"  roared  the  prisoner. 

"  Oh,  very  well  !  call  another  boatswain's  mate  then," 
said  Captain  Deadeye. 

The  new  practitioner  pulled  off  his  coat,  holding  his  hat 
in  his  left  hand,  and  stroking  his  hair  down  his  forehead 
with  the  right. 


FUN,  FKIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  225 

"  Give  this  man  two  dozen,"  said  Deadeye,  "  and  if  you 
favor  him,  I'll  have  you  put  under  arrest,  and  stop  your 
grog." 

This  gentleman  was  as  large  as  the  last.  Having  plant- 
ed himself  firmly  on  his  feet,  he  set  to  work ;  but  this  fresh 
application  of  the  lash  did  not  elicit  from  the  prisoner  a 
single  exclamation  of  pain.  He  bore  his  punishment  in  sul- 
len silence,  and  when  the  three  dozen  had  been  reported  as 
having  been  inflicted, 

"  What  do  you  say  now,  John  Handlead,  are  you  sorry  ?" 
inquired  the  captain. 

But  unfortunate  John  Handlead  was  beyond  the  expres- 
sion of  regret  or  despair — in  a  word,  he  had  fainted  away. 
He  was  cast  loose — restoratives  were  applied,  and  he  soon 
came  to  himself.  As  for  me,  it  was  some  time  before  I  could 
get  the  scene  out  of  my  memory.  The  punishment  is  terri- 
ble, but  I  suppose  it  is  a  necessary  one. 

"  What  ailed  you  this  morning  ?"  inquired  Hamilton,  as 
we  were  seated  round  the  mess-table  at  supper. 

"  I  think  that  scene  this  morning  was  most  disgusting 
and  painful." 

"  What  would  you  do  with  a  rebellious  rascal  like 
that  r 

"  Is  there  no  other  mode  of  punishment  that  would  serve 
quite  as  well  ?" 

"  Oh,  yes  ;  there,  for  instance,  is  the  black  list."  **•• 

"  What  may  the  black  list  be  V 

"It  is  made  up  of  men  who  have  been  found  guilty  of 
trifling  offences,  not  sufficient  to  entitle  them  to  be  placed 
on  the  list  of  the  first  prisoners." 

"  And  what  is  done  with  them  ?" 

"  Oh,  that  depends  upon  the  taste  of  the  captain  en- 
tirely." 

"  By  Jove,"  interrupted  Staunton,  "  I  heard  of  one  who 
10* 


226  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OR, 

made  the  black  list  men,  when  the  day's  work  was  over, 
carry  about  their  hammocks,  with  a  musket  lashed  up  in  it ; 
at  every  six  feet  or  so,  a  rope  was  placed  across  the  quarter- 
deck, about  three  feet  from  the  floor,  over  which  they  had 
to  step  ;  it  was  worse  than  going  up  the  treadmill." 

"  That  was  an  ingenious  device,  indeed." 

"  I  heard  of  another,"  replied  Hamilton,  "  who  had  a  fancy 
that  the  iron  pins  about  the  ship  should  be  polished  until 
they  shone  like  silver  ;  some  water  the  grog  ;  others  stop 
it  entirely.  There  is  no  end  to  the  fertility  of  their  imagi- 
nations. It  is  nasty,  to  be  sure ;  but  upon  the  whole,  I  be- 
lieve the  men  themselves  like  to  be  flogged  better  than 
anything  else." 

"  Now,  suppose  there  was  no  such  thing  as  flogging, 
what  would  be  the  result  ?" 

"We  should  go  to  the  bottom  like  winking,  I  guess," 
said  Walter. 

"  There  would  be  loss  of  masts  and  of  lives,  wrecks,  fires, 
and  all  manner  of  devilment,"  said  Hamilton  ;  "  in  short,  the 
service  would  go  entirely  to  the  devil." 

"  I  think  it  is  going  there  as  it  is,"  said  Staunton. 

"  Well,  perhaps  it  may  be  ;  but  slowly." 

"  Promotion  is  infernally  slow." 

"  Are  you  fit  to  be  promoted  ?" 

"  Yes,  I  am  decidedly  of  that  opinion." 

"  Could  you,  for  instance,  bring  a  ship  of  ninety  guns  into 
action,  with  all  the  batteries  blazing  away  at  you,  as  old 
Hum  did  the  Ida  ?" 

"  Why,  I'm  not  so  sure  of  that ;  in  the  meantime  hand 
me  some  more  grog." 

"It  is  ten  o'clock,  gentlemen ;  please  to  put  out  the 
lights,"  said  the  master-at-arms,  opening  enough  of  the  door 
to  admit  his  head. 

"By  all  means,  master-at-arms  ;  dowse  the  glims,  boys," 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  227 

said  one  of  the  oldsters.  Not  many  minutes  had  elapsed, 
during  which,  it  is  needless  to  say,  the  order  had  not  been 
attended  to,  for  we  were  so  busily  engaged  in  discussing  the 
question  of  flogging,  with  other  important  nautical  affairs, 
that  we  forgot  all  about  it, 

"  Gentlemen,  it  is  past  ten,"  said  the  quarter-master, 
opening  the  door  once  more.  "  I  really  must  report  you 
to  the  first  lieutenant." 

"  Very  well,  we'll  do  it  in  less  than  no  time.  Hamilton, 
send  the  rum  this  way  ;  do  you  think  no  one  has  a  mouth 
but  yourself  ?" 

"  That  reminds  me  of  a  story  I  heard  the  last  time  I  was 
in  Ireland,"  replied  Hamilton,  who  was  a  native  of  that 
country. 

11  What  is  it — out  with  it,  whatever  it  is." 

"  Why,  some  Papist  gentlemen  were  dining  together 
during  Lent,  and  although  they  don't  eat  meat,  they  do  eat 
salmon  and  lobster  sauce,  or  turbot  with  ditto,  as  the  case 
may  be  ;  that  they  call  fasting,  I  was  at  a  party  where 
some  one  grabbed  up  rather  more  of  the  fish  than  fell  to 
his  share. 

" '  Hallo,  stop  that,'  said  a  longing  companion,  pulling 
the  dish  away  from  him.  t  Deuce  take  you  for  a  gorman- 
dizing vagabond ;  do  you  think  no  one  has  a  soul  to  be 
saved  but  yourself  T  " 

Again  the  master-at-arms  made  his  appearance.  "  Gen- 
tlemen," he  said,  "  I  really  must  go  to  the  first  lieutenant — 
I  am  very  sorry — but  you  know  it's  my  duty." 

"Take  a  glass  of  grog,  old  Weather-the-Mizen,"  said 
Hamilton,  "  before  you  go." 

"  I  shall  be  most  happy,  sir  •  your  health,  gentlemen  1" 
said  the  master. 

"  We  will  put  out  the  lights,  and  no  mistake  ;  hand  that 
lanthorn  here,"  said  Stauntqn. 


228  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

The  candle  was  shut  up  in  its  tin  case  accordingly,  and 
the  master  departed ;  but  the  instant  his  back  was  turned, 
it  was  taken  out  again.  At  length  the  noise  and  uproar 
of  the  party  rose  to  such  a  height,  that  a  messenger  came 
from  the  first  lieutenant,  ordering  us  instantly  to  repair  to 
our  hammocks,  whither  we  went  accordingly. 
A  STRANGE  SAIL. 

For  some  days  the  gale  continued — and  one  morning 
we  had  been  skipping  along  the  shore,  with  the  land-wind 
on  our  beam,  at  the  rate  of  five  or  six  knots  ;  but  so  quietly 
that  I  could  hear  the  roar  of  the  surf,  as  the  long,  smooth 
swell  broke  on  the  beach,  which,  from  the  loudness  of  the 
noise,  could  not  be  more  than  a  mile  to  leeward  of  us.  It 
was  a  cloudy  morning  ;  as  we  rose  and  fell  on  the  long  seas, 
with  our  sails  flapping  and  bulk-heads  creaking,  the  black 
•  clouds  which  had  lowered  along  the  horizon,  spread  rapidly, 
and  the  weather  had  all  the  appearance  of  becoming  rather 
dirtier  than  usual.  The  breeze  was  fitful,  and  came  down 
in  sudden  irregular  gusts  or  catspaws,  as  the  nautical  phrase 
is,  when  a  strange  sail  was  signalled  to  be  abaft  our  weather- 
beam. 

The  glasses  of  Captain  Deadeye  and  of  the  other  officers 
were  anxiously  pointed  in  the  direction  indicated,  and  in 
less  than  half  an  hour  a  vessel  hove  in  sight. 

"What  do  you  make  of  her,  Mr.  Morris ?"  said  the  cap- 
tain to  the  first  lieutenant,  as  he  sat  aloft  with  his  glass 
directed  towards  the  new  arrival, 

"  A  large  junk,  sir,  standing  right  away  from  the  shore." 

"  What  did  he  say  ?"  inquired  Hamilton,  who  stood  near 
the  gangway. 

"  A  junk,  I  believe." 

"Bravo  I"  said  Hamilton,  clapping  his  hands ;  "  we  shall 
get  some  prize  money  at  last." 

"To  be  sure  we  shall ;  I'll  sell  my  share  of  it." 


•      FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  229 

"What  will  you  take?" 

"  I'll  take  ten  pounds  for  it — ready  money  down,  though." 

"  I  don't  much  like  speculating ;  but,  if  you  please,  I'll 
give  you  half." 

"What,  five  pounds  for  a  Chinese  junk  !  laden,  perhaps, 
with  Sicee  silver  ;  what  a  greenhorn  you  must  think  me  : 
five  pounds  !  Well,  I  remember  now,  I'm  rather  hard  up, 
I  will  accept  your  offer  ;  give  me  the  blunt." 

"You  must  trust  to  my  honor.  I'll  pay  you  the  first 
port  we  touch  at." 

"Ah,  that's  quite  another  matter ;  not  that  I  doubt  your 
honor  in  the  least ;  but  I  should  much  rather  have  the 
money." 

In  the  meantime  we  had  rapidly  neared  the  junk,  which 
was,  like  all  vessels  of  her  class,  a  slow  sailer.  Perceiv- 
ing us  in  pursuit  of  her,  she  ran  in  towards  the  shore,  and 
at  length  got  into  water  so  shallow  as  to  render  any  fur- 
ther pursuit  of  her  rather  a  dangerous  venture.  Old  Dead- 
eye,  having  run  the  Ida  as  close  in  as  the  depth  of  water 
would  permit,  within  about  two  miles  of  her,  cast  anchor, 
and  ordered  out  the  boats. 

The  officers  and  men  who  were  selected  for  the  service 
were  called  up  and  mustered  on  the  quarter-deck  ;  in  the 
meanwhile  the  wind  had  fallen,  and  it  was  nearly  a  dead 
calm.  Everything  was  soon  in  readiness.  The  boats  re- 
ceived their  guns,  which  were  fixed  on  slides,  so  as  to  ren- 
der it  practicable  to  fire  them  over  the  bows,  if  it  was  found 
necessary,  without  interfering  with  the  operation  of  the  oars. 
The  sailors,  with  their  cutlasses  belted  round  their  waists, 
the  marines  with  their  muskets,  all  stepped  in.  The  order 
was  given  to  shove  off.  The  crews  tossed  their  oars,  and 
with  three  hearty  cheers,  set  out  on  their  expedition. 

I  was  in  the  pinnace,  which  led  the  way,  and  in  less  than 
an  hour  we  had  arrived  within  gun-shot  of  the  Chinaman. 


230  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OK,  ^  , 

"  There  is  a  gun  from  her,"  said  one  of  the  crew,  as  a 
long  volume  of  blue  smoke  came  rolling  over  the  water. 

"  The  devil  there  is !  what,  she'll  show  fight,  then,  will 
she  ?"  replied  the  first  lieutenant.  Slowly  the  smoke  pass- 
ed away,  and  a  round  shot,  darting  the  spray  in  our  faces, 
went  ricochetting  over  the  boat,  and  disappeared  almost 
half  a  mile  astern. 

The  boats,  which  had  been  pulling  in  compact  order,  were 
now  directed  to  separate,  so  that  there  might  be  less  chance 
of  any  future  shot  taking  effect. 

We  continued  our  advance  ;  two  more  guns  were  fired 
at  us,  but  as  yet  without  effect. 

"  There's  grape,  by  Jove  !"  said  the  first  lieutenant,  as 
the  sea  near  us  was  ploughed  up  into  a  sheet  of  boiling 
foam. 

"  The  cutter  returns  her  fire,"  said  the  coxswain. 

"  And  there's  a  jolly  rattle  from  the  barge  ;  we'll  soon 
be  alongside.  Hurra,  my  boys,"  shouted  one  of  the  crew. 

The  firing  now  became  hotter  ;  gun  after  gun  from  the 
junk  was  fired  at  us  in  quick  succession,  which  we  returned 
as  rapidly  as  we  could.  We  were  now  close  under  her  stern, 
keeping  up  an  incessant  fire  of  musketry. 

"  Ready,  men,  to  board,"  said  the  first  lieutenant,  as  we 
pushed  alongside.  "I'll  open  the  ball;  now  lie  close  in." 

"  And  I'll  be  your  partner,"  shouted  Hamilton,  following 
his  chief,  as  he  swung  himself  on  deck. 

We  clambered  up  after  them  as  rapidly  as  we  could,  and, 
after  a  very  short  conflict,  in  which  none  of  us  were  hurt, 
the  junk  was  our  own  ;  but  the  expectations  of  those  who 
had  calculated  upon  prize-money  met  with  a  sad  disappoint- 
ment upon  searching  her  ;  not  an  ounce  of  Sicee  silver, 
which  had  been  calculated  upon,  was  discovered.  She  was 
a  war-junk,  armed  from  stem  to  stern. 

There  was  nothing  then  to  be  done  but  to  take  possession 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  231 

of  her,  which  we  did  accordingly,  and  Captain  Deadeye 
requiring  a  pilot,  we  contrived,  through  the  medium  of  an 
interpreter,  to  make  his  wishes  known  to  the  Chinese  crew. 
But  not  one  of  them  could  be  found  to  accept  the  invidious 
office. 

It  was  in  vain  that  old  Deadeye  offered  a  reward  of  ten 
dollars  to  any  one  of  the  captured  crew  who  would  steer  us 
safely  into  the  harbor  of  Chapoo,  which  we  were  now  ap- 
proaching. 

At  length  half-a-dozen  or  so  were  marshalled  on  the  deck, 
and,  through  the  medium  of  an  interpreter,  were  thus  ad- 
dressed by  the  captain : 

"  Will  you  pilot  the  vessel  safely  into  the  harbor  ?" 

A  unanimous  shake  of  the  head  was  the  only  reply. 

"  Fetch  a  rope,"  said  the  captain,  "  and  have  the  first  fel- 
low hanged  immediately." 

A  cord  was  then  fastened  round  the  Chinaman's  neck, 
and  the  end  passed  over  the  yard-arm  of  the  vessel.  The 
poor  fellow  perfectly  understood  the  hint,  and  began  to 
evince  considerable  symptoms  of  trepidation. 

"  String  him  up  at  once,"  said  the  captain. 

"  I  will  do  what  you  require,"  said  the  Chinese  sailor,  in 
a  piteous  tone. 

"  Take  him  to  the  wheel ;  keep  the  rope  fast  round  him, 
and  the  instant  you  think  there  is  any  reason  to  apprehend 
he  is  leading  us  into  danger,  hang  him,"  said  Captain  Dead- 
eye. 

The  Chinese  pilot,  under  the  influence  of  this  gentle  spe- 
cies of  coercion,  did  his  work  to  admiration.  We  rapidly 
drew  near  the  entrance  of  the  harbor,  and  the  tide  being 
favorable  we  were  soon  inside,  and  within  reach  of  two 
small  forts  which  had  been  raised  to  protect  the  entrance. 
Not  a  gun,  however,  was  fired  from  either,  and  we  passed 
into  full  view  of  the  towa  In  front  of  it  were  drawn  up  a 


232  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

large  number  of  trading  vessels  of  every  description,  moored 
in  parallel  lines,  and  protected  by  a  fort  which  commanded 
the  harbor  as  well  as  the  town. 

"Now  we  shall  have  prize-money,  and  lots  of  it  too," 
said  the  first  lieutenant  with  a  grin. 

"  I  hope  so,"  replied  Staunton  ;  "  but  look  at  these  fel- 
lows, how  they're  mustering  in  the  fort :  we  shall  catch  it 
soon,  I  reckon." 

The  Ida  now  stood  in  straight  for  the  shore,  and  took  up 
a  flanking  position  as  close  to  the  fort  as  it  was  possible  to 
bring  her. 

"  Give  them  a  touch  with  the  grape  and  round-shot," 
said  the  captain. 

The  order  thus  given  was  promptly  executed.  Shot, 
shell,  and  cannister  were  poured  in  in  quick  succession  ;  the 
fire  from  the  fort  waxed  feebler  and  feebler,  until  at  length 
all  was  silent :  but,  though  vanquished,  the  fort  was  not  sub- 
dued ;  a  number  of  well-armed  troops  were  seen  rapidly  de- 
scending the  adjacent  hills,  bringing  with  them  heavy  jingals 
mounted  on  triangular  stands,  which  soon  opened  a  smart 
fire  upon  us. 

"  They  are  firing  musketry,  by  Jove  !  there's  one  of  our 
men  down,"  said  Hamilton. 

"  Now,  then,  forward  with  the  long  gun :  cram  it  well 
with  grape,  and  let  us  see  how  neatly  you  pitch  it  at  that 
column,"  said  Deadeye.  " 

"  Steady,  my  man,  steady  !  a  little  higher,  now  you  are 
about  at  it." 

"  Fire !" 

The  effect  was  tremendous  :  we  could  see  the  serried 
ranks  scattered  like  a  whirl  of  autumn  leaves.  Another 
shot  or  so  settled  the  business,  and  they  scampered  off  as  if 
the  very  devil  was  at  their  heels. 

The  boats  were  then  ordered  out,  and  possession  was 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  233 

taken  of  the  fort  by  a  party  of  marines  :  four  guns,  two  of 
brass  and  two  of  iron,  were  found  and  spiked.  The  sheds 
ind  buildings  were  set  on  fire,  the  magazine  deluged  with 
nrater,  and  the  entire  place  rendered  harmless  in  regard  of 
iny  further  offensive  or  defensive  operations. 

The  men  were  now  piped  to  dinner.  When  they  had 
ilined,  we  took  possession  of  the  juriks  in  the  harbor,  many 
of  which  were  found  to  contain  stores  of  considerable  value. 
The  day's  work  was  a  hard  one  ;  but,  as  it  had  turned  out 
so  profitable,  we  were  all  perfectly  satisfied  with  th'e  result 
of  our  labors,  and  the  Chinese  pilot  grinned  from  ear  to  ear 
with  delight  when,  the  noose  being  removed  from  his  neck, 
he  was  dismissed  from  his  employment  with  ten  clinking  dol- 
lars in  his  yellow  hand. 

It  was  during  the  operations  which  I  have  thus  been  en- 
deavoring to  describe  that  Morris  came  out  in  his  true  cha- 
racter. He  had  always  been  accused  of  a  tyrannical  temper, 
but  until  now  it  had  never  shown  itself  save  in  petty  in- 
stances. Now,  the  love  of  justice  inherent  in  old  Deadeye 
was  such  that  I  do  not  believe  he  would  have  had  a  soul  in 
the  ship  wronged  wilfully.  But  the  difficulty  was  how  to 
satisfy  him.  And  I  believe  the  incident  I  am  now  about  to 
relate  opened  his  eyes  for  the  first  time.  It  was  the  duty 
of  Ellis — having  been  confined  to  the  deck  until  two,  which 
was  called  the  forenoon  watch — to  superintend  any  of  the 
operations  which  might  take  place,  such  as  launching  of  the 
boats,  &c.,  when  the  pinnace  was  required  to  take  a  party 
of  the  marines  ashore.  Morris,  having  called  the  mate,  said 
to  him,  "  Mr.  Ellis,  you  will  take  these  men  on  shore  in  the 
pinnace,  and  return  again  immediately." 

"  Yery  well,  sir,"  replied  the  youngster,  pushing  off. 

It  so  chanced  that  I  was  on  deck.  Having  nothing  bet- 
ter to  do,  I  was  amusing  myself  by  watching  the  men  land- 
ing. When  they  were  all  safe  ashore,  Ellis  stood  up  and 


234  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

gave  the  order  to  return,  when  a  sergeant  of  marines  came 
back  to  the  boat  for  some  of  his  accoutrements,  which  had 
been  forgotten  in  the  hurry  of  the  moment.  Scarcely  five 
minutes  elapsed  for  the  whole  transaction,  and  the  boat  re- 
turned to  the  ship. 

"I  thought,  sir,  I  had  desired  you  to  make  no  delay?" 
said  Morris,  who  had  been  watching  the  proceeding. 

"  No  more  I  did,  sir  ;"  and  Ellis  related  the  fact  as  it  had 
occurred. 

"I  don't  care,  sir,  about  the  d — d  marine,  my  orders 
should  have  been  attended  to." 

"  I  only  delayed  a  few  moments,  which  were  absolutely 
necessary  ;  the  exigencies  of  the  service  required  it." 

"  D — n  the  exigencies  of  the  service  I  what  right  has  a 
youngster  like  you  to  think  ?  You'll  stay  on  the  deck  for  two 
hours." 

"  But,  sir,  you  can  refer  to " 

"  Hold  your  tongue,  sir,  or  I'll  report  you  to  the  captain  ; 
I'll  teach  you  to  obey  orders." 

Well,  thought  I,  if  this  be  not  an  ill-conditioned  ruffian, 
I  never  met  one.  My  messmate  had  no  more  intention  of 
disobeying  orders,  or  of  acting  save  for  the  best,  than  he 
had  of  flying.  I  therefore  availed  myself  of  the  opportunity 
of  Morris  turning  his  back  to  go  up  and  express  my  opinion 
of  the  whole  transaction. 

"  He  is  a  beast !"  said  Ellis  ;  "  I  always  thought  him  so, 
now  I'm  sure  of  it." 

"  Halloa,"  said  I,  "  what  a  lot  of  fish  are  swimming  about 
here  ;  come  down  into  the  chains  and  have  a  look  at  them." 
Now,  if  the  chains  are  not  a  part  and  parcel  of  the  deck  I 
know  not  what  is  ;  but  so  it  was  :  we  had  been  there  only 
a  few  moments  when  the  voice  of  Morris  was  heard  ex- 
claiming— 

"  Where  is  Mr.  Ellis?" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.          235 

"  Here  I  am,  sir." 

"  How  dare  you  leave  the  deck  without  my  permission  !" 

"  I  did  not  mean  to  leave  it,  I  assure  you,  sir.  I  thought 
always  the  chains  were  a  part  of  the  deck." 

"  They  are  not,  sir ;  by  G — d,  I'll  teach  you  the  differ- 
ence !" 

"  I  assure  you,  sir,  I  had  no  intention  whatever  of  diso- 
beying orders." 

"  Hold  your  mutinous  tongue,  you  young  rascal." 

"I'm  sure  I'm " 

"  If  you  utter  another  word  I'll  report  you  to  the  cap- 
tain." 

"  I  wish  to  Heavens  you  would,  sir ;  he  would  not  see 
me  so  unjustly  treated." 

"  I'll  take  you  at  your  word  ;  I  will  report  you,  by  the 
Lord  !  you'll  catch  it :  in  the  meantime  you  shall  remain 
where  you  are  until  ten  o'clock.  I'll  take  the  temper  out 
of  you,  you  infernal  young  devil." 

Now  let  us  see  what  was  the  consequence  ;  simply  this  : 
the  poor  fellow  was  obliged  to  remain,  kicking  his  heels 
about  the  deck  until  eight  o'clock,  when  his  turn  of  duty 
came  to  keep  the  midnight  watch.  He  was  thus  exposed 
for  nearly  twelve  hours  without  the  chance  of  getting  a 
wink  of  sleep.  But  the  persecutor  did  not  escape.  It 
transpired  before  long  that  the  whole  transaction  had 
reached  the  ears  of  the  captain,  and  I  have  every  reason 
to  believe  that  Mr.  Morris  got  a  sharp  rap  over  the  knuckles 
for  his  misconduct. 

We  now  proceeded  to  beat  up  for  our  destination,  but 
the  strength  and  rapidity  of  the  currents  among  the  Chusan 
islands,  together  with  the  boisterous  weather  which  soon  set 
in,  rendered  it  a  task  of  difficulty  to  keep  time.  We  were 
the  first  at  the  appointed  rendezvous,  however ;  but  the 
Admiral  did  not  arrive  until  many  days  afterwards. 


236  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

MORE  FIGHTING. 

I  had  the  morning  watch.  We  were  standing  in  pretty 
close  to  the  shore.  The  air  was  pure  and  cool ;  the  bright 
tints,  peculiar  to  all  tropical  climates,  being  mellowed  with 
a  subdued  light,  which  imparted  great  beauty  to  the  scene. 
The  thick  mists  which  hung  over  the  shore  gave  a  great  ap- 
parent extent  to  the  view.  The  sea  looked  a  transparent 
blue,  while  the  sky  above  glowed  with  a  rosy  tinge,  which 
gradually  increased  to  gold,  as  the  sun  came  rolling  up 
above  the  horizon. 

"  What  a  lovely  morning  it  is,"  I  said  to  Hamilton,  who 
stood  near  me. 

"  Yes,  only  too  fine  for  the  work  we  have  to  do." 
"Why,  certainly,  bloodshed  and  war  are  not  pleasant 
things  ;  but  if  they  must  be,  the  sooner  they  are  over  the 
better.     We  must  do  something  for  our  pay." 

"  Pay,  indeed !  a  nice  sum,  per  diem,  to  run  the  chance 
of  being  made  food  for  the  fishes." 

"  Well,  then,  glory  is  something,"  I  replied,  "and  fame — " 
"  D — n  glory  and  fame  ;  they  are  both  humbugs  !" 
With  this  sentiment  of  my  companion's,  thus  forcibly  ex- 
pressed, I  was  not  at  that  moment  disposed  to  quarrel.     I 
had  not  received  any  intelligence  from  England  for  a  con- 
siderable period,  and  I  was  beginning,  not  indeed  to  feel 
home-sick,  but  to  entertain  some  apprehensions  that  evil  of 
one  kind  or  another  might  have  befallen  those  whom  I  loved 
best  upon  earth. 

It  was  pretty  well  known  throughout  the  fleet  that  our 
expedition  was  to  be  made  up  one  of  the  great  rivers  of  the 
country,  known  by  the  name  of  the  Yang-tze,  provided  the 
attack  upon  Chapoo,  for  which  active  preparations  were 
now  being  made,  turned  out  successful.  As  yet  our  opera- 
tions had  been  attended  with  signal  success,  and  the  glory 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  237 

which  has  hitherto  followed  in  the  course  of  the  British  flag 
had  not  for  an  instant  deserted  us. 

At  the  distance  of  about  fifty  miles  from  the  great  city 
whose  capture  had  been  determined  upon,  lies  the  town  of 
Ningpo.  It  is  of  considerable  commercial  importance,  be- 
ing famous  throughout  the  world  for  the  richness  and  vari- 
ety of  its  silks.  The  town  is  a  much  finer  one  than  Amoy, 
or  indeed  than  any  other  of  the  newly-opened  ports  upon 
those  seas.  Junks  of  large  size  are  built  on  the  river,  and 
the  inhabitants,  in  spite  of  the  prohibition  of  their  govern- 
ment, have  always  evinced  a  strong  desire  to  trade  upon 
peaceable  terms  with  other  nations. 

It  was  at  this  place,  towards  the  conclusion  of  the  seven- 
teenth century,  that  the  Portuguese  missionaries  first  com- 
menced their  operations  in  the  East.  Their  influence,  for  a 
long  time,  was  unbounded,  and  high  expectations  were 
entertained,  as  to  the  results  of  their  labors,  as  soon  as  the 
good  seed  which  they  had  sown  should  have  time  to  ripen  to 
maturity.  But,  alas  !  missionaries,  after  all,  are  but  men,  and 
the  failings  common  to  humanity  seem  to  have  been  shared 
in,  to  a  great  extent,  by  these  teachers  of  Christianity. 
They  omitted  no  opportunity  of  aggrandizing  themselves  at 
the  expense  of  the  unfortunate  natives.  Repeated  instances 
of  this  kind,  followed  up  by  cruelty,  gradually  weakened 
their  influence,  and  at  length  the  Chinese  government  per- 
emptorily forbade  the  further  teaching  of  a  religion,  the 
inculcation  of  which  was  attended  by  consequences  so  com- 
pletely demoralizing.  This  important  city,  whose  history  I 
have  thus  briefly  sketched,  was  taken  possession  of  by  our 
troops  in  the  month  of  May,  but  it  was  found  impossible  to 
retain  possession  of  so  great  a  place  without  having  in  it  a 
larger  garrison  than  we  could  well  afford  ;  a  virtue  was 
therefore  made  of  what,  in  point  of  fact,  was  an  urgent  ne- 


238  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OB, 

cessitj.  The  magnates  of  the  town  were  invited  to  attend  in 
solemn  assembly,  where  they  were  addressed  by  the  present 
Lord  Gough,  then  Sir  Hugh.  He  informed  them  that 
her  gracious  Majesty  had  been  pleased  to  restore  to  them 
their  capital,  which  he  hoped,  in  consideration  of  this  act 
of  clemency,  would  be  used  for  pacific  purposes  in  future. 

The  Chinese  mandarins  looked  in  much  astonishment 
from  one  to  the  other,  as  if  they  found  it  difficult  to  account 
for  the  reason  of  this  extraordinary  proceeding  ;  but  when 
the  keys  of  the  gates  were  handed  over  to  the  persons  ap- 
pointed to  receive  them,  their  joy  knew  no  bounds.  They 
were  lavish  in  expressions  of  gratitude.  As  to  the  origin  of 
the  quarrel  between  the  two  nations,  it  is  by  no  means 
within  the  scope  of  my  purpose  to  pause  for  its  investiga- 
tion. I  can  only,  speaking  as  I  do,  from  the  constant  op- 
portunity of  a  personal  investigation,  confidently  assert  that 
upon  our  side  the  contest  was  carried  on  with  a  magnani- 
mity not  unworthy  of  the  British  prowess. 

"  Huzza,  my  boys  !  I  have  glorious  news  to  tell  you," 
shouted  Hamilton,  waving  his  cap  round  his  head,  as  he 
rushed  into  the  gun-room,  where  we  were  quietly  supping 
off  the  remnants  of  a  somewhat  frugal  dinner. 

"  Bear  a  hand,  and  out  with  it,"  we  exclaimed  simultane- 
ously. 

"We  are  not  to  wait  any  longer  for  the  rest  of  the 
squadron.  Old  Deadeye  is  going  to  attack  the  town  with- 
out them.  Hurrah  !  no  more  of  this  coasting  work ;  I'm 
sick  to  death  of  it." 

"  Wash  the  cobwebs  out  of  your  throat,  old  boy,  and 
tell  us  all  about  it.  Here's  a  glass  of  three-finger  grog  for 
you." 

"Well,  then,  the  first  lieutenant  has  just  told  me,  he 
having  had  it  direct  from  the  skipper,  that  as  the  reinforce- 
ments have  not  arrived,  instead  of  waiting  for  these  negoti- 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND    YACHTING.  239 

ators,  diplomatizers,  or  any  botheration  of  the  sort,  he  has 
made  up  his  mind  to  sail  slick  into  the  harbor  and  knock 
the  town  about  their  ears." 

"  Amen  I"  ejaculated  Staunton,  with  a  pious  fervor  which 
was  infinitely  entertaining. 

But  old  Deadeye  was  not  to  have  all  the  fun  to  himself ; 
and  perhaps  it  was  just  as  well  for  his  ship's  company.  The 
remainder  of  the  squadron  were  shortly  afterwards  signalled 
in  the  distance.  We  waited  until  they  came  up,  and  the 
Cornwallis,  Blonde,  Columbine,  and  Plover,  with  troops  on 
board,  soon  joined  us.  We  then  bore  up,  sweeping  to  the 
westward  ;  and  about  nightfall,  just  as  the  range  of  hills 
about  Chapoo  rose  towering  above  the  sea,  we  cast  anchor, 
and  waited  patiently  for  the  dawn. 

When  the  sun  rose,  we  found  ourselves  nearer  to  the 
shore  than  we  anticipated.  The  aspect  of  the  country  was 
beautiful ;  the  fields  seemed  well  cultivated  with  a  variety 
of  crops,  which  were  luxuriant.  The  view,  too,  was  a  splen- 
did one.  A  high  range  of  hills  sloped  down  nearly  to  the 
water's  edge.  In  a  nook  of  these,  and  close  to  a  small 
promontory  which  ran  out  to  the  westward,  lay  the  town. 
It  appeared  well-built  and  extensive,  and  afforded  promise 
of  being  the  most  important  capture  we  had  yet  made.  As 
we  stood  in  towards  the  shore,  a  fishing-boat  which  was 
cruising  about  the  bay  was  captured,  and  the  crew  brought 
on  board,  whom  we  interrogated  as  to  the  defences  of  the 
place  we  were  about  to  attack. 

"How  many  soldiers  are  there  in  the  town ?"  inquired 
Deadeye. 

The  man  bowed  to  the  ground,  performing  the  same  spe- 
cies of  homage  he  would  to  a  mandarin,  but  spoke  not. 

"  Tell  him  Fll  have  him  flogged,  if  he  don't  answer  my 
questions,"  said  Deadeye  to  the  interpreter. 

"  He  won't  understand  what  that  means,  I  fear." 


240  SWELL   LIFE    AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Well  !  bastinadoed,  then  ;  it  comes  pretty  much  to  the 
same  thing,  I  believe,"  replied  the  captain. 

The  hint  was  accordingly  conveyed,  and  the  fisherman 
muttered  something  which  was  quite  unintelligible. 

"I  can't  make  him  out,  for  the  life  of  me,"  said  the  inter- 
preter. 

"  Try  another  of  them,  then,"  said  the  captain.  "  Per- 
haps they  are  all  dumb  ;  they  look  as  queer  a  set  of  fellows, 
at  any  rate,  as  ever  I  clapped  my  eyes  upon." 

Another  was  then  desired  to  stand  forward,  but  a  similar 
question  put  to  him  met  with  a  precisely  similar  result. 

"  You  must  treat  him  as^  you  did  the  pilot — that's  the 
only  language  they  understand." 

"  I'll  have  you  hanged,  you  ruffian,  for  daring  to  trifle 
with  the  captain  of  a  man-of-war." 

The  same  ceremony  was  then  gone  through  ;  but  when 
he  saw  that  preparations  for  stringing  him  up  were  all  com- 
pleted, the  fisherman  found  a  voice,  and  stated,  in  effect, 
that  the  batteries  were  very  strong,  and  that  there  was  a 
force  of  several  thousand  soldiers  there  for  their  defence. 

"  Ha  !"  said  old  Deadeye,  working  his  empty  sleeve,  "  we 
shall  have  some  warm  work ;"  and  the  veteran,  as  he  spoke, 
looked  like  one  smelling  the  combat  from  afar. 

As  we  approached  nearer,  the  place  looked  exceedingly 
formidable.  Breastworks  were  thrown  up  along  the  heights  ; 
they  seemed  particularly  strong  in  the  slopes  between  the 
hills.  Upon  the  side  nearest  to  the  town  there  were  two 
batteries,  mounting,  as  well  as  we  could  make  out,  about 
seven  guns  each ;  and  upon  a  low  hill,  in  front  of  the  sub- 
urbs, there  was  a  circular  one  with  fourteen  guns.  Further 
on  to  the  westward  there  was  a  masked  battery,  which 
seemed  not  yet  finished. 

The  usual  soundings  were  duly  taken  along  the  whole 
extent  of  the  shore.  Although  we  had  run  close  in,  not  a 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  241 

shot  had  as  yet  been  fired  upon  us.  We  could  distinctly 
see,  through  our  glasses,  mandarins  dispatching  messengers 
along  the  heights,  which  now  swarmed  with  soldiers ;  and 
at  length  Deadeye  ordered  out  a  boat  to  ascertain  if  the 
shore  was  practicable  for  landing  troops.  The  boats  having 
in  due  time  returned  without  an  accident,  and  the  report 
being  favorable,  the  ships  of  our  squadron,  at  nightfall,  took 
up  their  positions  directly  in  front  of  the  principal  batteries, 
so  as  to  cover  the  landing  of  the  soldiers,  which  it  was  then 
agreed  upon  should  take  place  in  the  bay,  which,  as  before 
mentioned,  lay  a  little  to  the  eastward. 

The  morning  was  beautiful ;  a  lovelier  one  never  dawned. 
The  sun  rose  in  clear,  unclouded  majesty,  upon  many  a  man, 
on  either  side,  who  was  destined  never  to  see  him  set.  The 
success  we  had  hitherto  had  made  us  rather  more  confident 
than  perhaps  we  ought  to  have  been,  and  we  little  antici- 
pated a  determined  resistance.  At  an  early  hour  the  signals 
were  made  for  the  action  to  commence,  and  we  set  to  work 
with  a  hearty  good-will.  The  steamers  stood  well  in,  and 
threw  the  troops  on  shore.  Sir  Hugh  Gough  landed  with 
the  first  column,  and  at  once  succeeded  in  carrying  the  prin- 
cipal height.  In  the  meantime  we  were  blazing  away,  with- 
out intermission.  At  this  juncture  a  signal  was  made  from 
the  Nemesis  for  every  seaman  and  mariner  who  could  be 
spared  from  the  respective  ships,  for  the  purpose  of  support- 
ing the  troops  who  were  hotly  engaged. 

"  Can  we  spare  any  of  our  men,  Mr.  Morris  V  said  the 
captain. 

"  Why,  not  many.  I  think  a  boat's  crew  or  so  might 
go ;  we've  nearly  silenced  our  batteries,  and  there's  no 
knowing — we  never  can  calculate  upon  these  mandarins." 

I  asked  and  obtained  permission  to  accompany  the  boat's 
crew,  which  was  placed  under  the  command  of  Hamilton,  as 
I  thought  I  should  see  more  of  what  was  going  on  than  if  I 

11 


242  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

remained  on  board,  where,  in  consequence  of  the  smoke,  little 
could  be  observed.  It  seemed  Amoy  over  again,  without 
variation. 

Off  we  went ;  and  having  succeeded  in  effecting  a  land- 
ing, we  joined  the  left  column,  which  was  led  by  Sir  Hugh 
Gough  in  person. 

Our  first  object  of  attack  was  an  intrenched  fort,  which 
we  never  doubted  to  take  by  a  flank  movement,  under  cover 
of  the  Sesostris,  who  was  keeping  up  a  pretty  smart  fire  of 
shells. 

On  we  went ;  and  then,  for  the  first  time,  I  stood  face  to 
face  with  the  Chinese  soldiers.  We  saluted  them  with  a 
volley,  which  they  returned  with  a  precision  that  knocked 
over  our  leading  files,  and  then  we  charged  them  with  the 
bayonet,  the  men  from  the  Ida  flourishing  their  cutlasses, 
and  shouting  as  if  the  devil  was  in  them. 

This  was  a  species  of  attack  the  Chinese  had  no  mind  to 
encounter.  We  had  scarcely  closed,  when  off  they  went, 
pell-mell.  The  ground  was  broken  and  covered  with  bushes, 
by  its  nature  retarding  any  very  effective  pursuit ;  we  were 
obliged  therefore  to  separate.  I  kept  with  the  seamen  as 
well  as  I  could,  but  it  was  soon  found  very  much  every  man 
for  himself. 

We  made  right  at  a  host  of  Chinese,  who  appeared  deter- 
mined to  withstand  our  further  progress,  at  the  extremity 
of  a  narrow  defile,  where  they  took  up  a  commanding  po- 
sition. 

As  we  passed  a  tomb  which  lay  in  our  way,  there  was 
one  of  their  officers,  apparently  of  rank,  perfectly  unmoved, 
and  looking  on  as  if  he  were  the  unconcerned  spectator  of  a 
drama. 

"Shall  I  cut  him  down  ?"  said  Brown,  one  of  our  seamen, 
flourishing  his  cutlass. 

11  No,  let  him  alone  ;  he  looks  as  if  he  meant  no  one  any- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  243 

harm,"  replied  Hamilton  ;  and  so  it  turned  out.  The  Chi- 
nese, as  we  passed,  instead  of  being  grateful  for  his  escape, 
began  deliberately  to  cut  his  throat  with  a  knife.  I  paused 
for  an  instant  (curiosity  getting  the  better  of  all  my  excite- 
ment) to  see  if  he  were  really  in  earnest.  He  was,  and  he 
soon  effected  his  purpose.  "  Well,"  thought  I,  "you  are 
certainly  a  curious  fellow.  It  would  have  been  very  much 
the  same  to  yourself,  had  you  let  us  knock  you  quietly  on 
the  head  ;  you  would  then  have  died  like  a  Christian  and 
a  gentleman." 

Having  come  up  with  my  party,  I  found  them  engaged 
in  a  hand-to-hand  encounter  with  a  party  of  the  enemy, 
who  were  commanded  by  a  Chinese  mandarin  on  horseback. 
Hamilton  made  a  dash  at  him  ;  the  mandarin  rode  furiously 
forward,  making  a  lunge  with  his  long  sword  at  the  assail- 
ant. My  messmate  dexterously  warded  it  off  with  his  cut- 
lass, and  catching  the  horse  by  the  bridle,  the  animal  reared 
up  and  threw  his  rider.  The  mandarin,  however,  was  on 
his  feet  in  a  moment.  The  combat  which  then  ensued  re- 
minded me  of  one  of  those  .described  by  old  Homer.  The 
mandarin  was  as  active  as  a  cat.  The  weapon  he  wielded 
was  a  formidable  one,  and  he  understood  its  use.  The  flash 
and  glitter  of  the  ringing  steel  was  almost  dazzling.  I 
paused  for  a  moment  as  each  party  watched  the  encounter. 
It  did  not  last  long.  A  thrust  in  the  shoulder  roused  my 
companion's  wrath.  One  sheer  stroke  from  the  English 
cutlass,  breaking  through  the  Chinaman's  guard,  felled  him 
to  the  earth  ;  and  when  he  was  down,  we  despoiled  him  of 
his  peacock's  feather  and  white  button,  both  of  which  are 
badges  of  high  rank. 

We  now  entered  a  deep  gorge,  in  the  centre  of  which 
was  a  large  building  surrounded  by  a  dead  wall,  inside  of 
which  the  fugitives  had  retreated,  keeping  up  a  smart  fire 
from  the  embrasures  and  the  windows  of  the  house.  We 


244  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

summoned  them  to  surrender,  but  the  only  reply  was  a  rat- 
tling volley,  which  sent  several  of  our  party  to  their  ac- 
count ;  a  temporary  pause  was  the  consequence.  We  had 
not  enough  men  to  carry  the  place,  we  therefore  waited 
until  we  were  rejoined  by  our  companions.  When  they 
came  up,  it  was  determined  to  pause  until  some  of  the  guns 
had  arrived,  as  the  place  seemed  strongly  fortified.  But 
the  excitement  of  the  moment  unfortunately  prevailed  over 
the  dictates  of  prudence  ;  Colonel  Tornlinson  swore  he 
would  take  the  place,  and,  throwing  himself  at  the  head 
of  a  party  of  the  Forty-ninth,  advanced  to  the  attack. 
But  the  gallant  leader  had  scarcely  gained  the  entrance, 
when  he  was  shot  dead,  in  the  very  act  of  waving  his  sword 
and  cheering  his  men  on  to  the  attack.  We  rushed  on  to 
avenge  his  loss  ;  the  men  were  furious  with  excitement,  but 
a  volley  fired  with  deadly  precision  sent  them  staggering 
back  from  the  scene  of  conflict.  It  was  at  length  found 
prudent  to  sound  a  recall ;  the  place  could  not  be  taken  by 
storm.  We  waited  until  the  arrival  of  two  pieces  of  artil- 
lery, which  soon  silenced  the  Chinese  fire.  When  it  had 
ceased,  we  entered,  and  a  scene  of  slaughter  met  my  eyes 
which  I  can  never  forget ;  out  of  three  hundred  men,  by 
whom  the  place  was  defended,  only  fifty  were  found  alive, 
and  nearly  all  of  these  were  terribly  wounded.  The  unfor- 
tunate wretches  were  aggravating  their  deplorable  condition 
by  attempting  to  commit  suicide ;  we  found  them  deliber- 
ately occupied  in  setting  fire  to  their  long  cotton  dresses, 
with  lighted  matches,  and  many  perished  before  we  could 
possibly  prevent  them.  Inside  one  of  the  sheds  was  found 
the  body  of  a  soldier  of  the  Eighteenth  Light  Company, " 
whom  the  savages  had  mutilated  horribly.  They  had  cut 
off  his  ears  and  nose  with  his  own  razor,  which  they  had 
taken  for  the  purpose  out  of  his  knapsack — a  singular  proof 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  245 

of  cruelty,  at  a  time  when  few  of  them  could  have  antici- 
pated an  escape  with  their  own  lives. 

With  the  destruction  of  this  building,  thus  resolutely  de- 
fended, terminated  all  attempt  at  resistance.  The  batteries 
had  been  silenced  by  the  fire  of  the  ships,  and  the  city  was 
now  in  our  hands.  Every  possible  care  was  taken  of  the 
wounded,  but  all  our  efforts  were  unavailing  to  prevent  re- 
peated attempts  at  self-destruction  on  the  part  of  our  prison- 
ers. We  found  women  destroying  their  children,  and  after- 
wards putting  an  end  to  their  own  existence ;  husbands 
poisoning  their  wives,  and  cutting  their  own  throats,  with 
every  other  species  of  barbarism  which  it  is  possible  to 
imagine. 

The  Chinese  force  engaged  in  the  defence  of  this  city  has 
been  estimated  at  considerably  above  seven  thousand  men, 
of  whom  nearly  one-fourth  were  Tartars.  The  number  of 
killed  and  wounded  must  have  been  immense  ;  on  our  side 
the  loss  was  considerable,  but  it  was  for  the  most  part  con- 
fined to  those  who  were  engaged  in  the  land  service,  the 
ship's  crews  had  scarcely  suffered  at  all ;  and  when  we  re- 
turned on  board  we  found  old  Deadeye  pacing  to  and  fro 
on  the  quarter-deck  in  the  highest  possible  spirits.  His  joy 
was,  however,  somewhat  damped  upon  hearing  the  casual- 
ties which  had  occurred  on  shore,  especially  in  the  loss  of 
Colonel  Tomlinson,  who  was  an  old  and  valued  friend.  It 
had  been  determined  upon  that  the  remains  of  this  distin- 
guished officer  should  not  be  interred  on  shore,  lest  the  Chi- 
nese should  avail  themselves  of  our  absence  to  dig  them  up, 
and  afterwards  commit  some  of  those  horrible  acts  of  mu- 
tilation which  one  shudders  to  contemplate.  Sir  William 
Parker  having  placed  a  steamer  for  the  purpose  at  the  dis- 
posal of  his  friends,  on  the  20th  of  May  the  body  was  re- 
moved on  board  of  the  Phlegethon,  and  taken  out  into  deep 
water.  All  our  officers  attended  in  full  uniform,  and  the 


246  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

scene  was  one  of  such  touching  solemnity  that  it  can  never 
be  effaced  from  my  recollection.  It  was  a  beautiful  spring 
morning  ;  a  light  breeze  swept  the  surface  of  the  water,  as  it 
sparkled  in  the  sunshine.  As  we  arrived  on  board  of  the 
Phlegethon  the  officers  and  men  were  drawn  up  in  full  uni- 
form upon  deck.  The  bell  began  to  toll  about  eleven 
o'clock.  It  has  a  strange  sound  upon  the  ear,  that  tolling 
of  the  funeral  bell  at  sea,  bringing  with  it  associations  and 
memories  of  scenes  of  our  earlier  days,  and  subduing  the 
sternest  hearts  with  softened  emotions.  The  body  of  the 
departed  veteran,  sewn  up  in  a  hammock  with  shot  attached 
to  the  feet,  was  brought  up  and  laid  upon  a  grating,  which 
was  covered  with  a  union-jack.  The  officers  stood  behind 
the  captain,  on  the  quarter-deck,  while  the  crew,  and  such 
of  the  soldiers  as  had  been  directed  to  attend,  assembled  on 
the  gangways  and  by  the  sides  of  the  grating.  The  bell 
then  ceased  tolling,  and  an  impressive  silence  ensued,  un- 
broken save  by  the  rippling  of  the  waves  against  the  ship's 
sides,  and  the  whistling  of  the  breeze  through  her  shrouds. 
We  all  took  off  our  hats,  and  the  chaplain,  in  a  clear  and 
solemn  voice,  began  to  read  the  burial  service  for  the  dead. 
When  he  came  to  that  portion  beginning,  "  Forasmuch  as 
it  hath  pleased  Almighty  God,"  there  was  a  slight  pause, 
while  the  men  were  engaged  in  getting  the  grating  forward  ; 
at  the  words  "  we,  therefore,  commit  his  body  to  the  deep," 
the  grating,  colors  and  all,  were  launched  forward,  and  fell 
with  a  deep  and  heavy  splash  into  the  sea.  The  blue  water 
swept  above  the  remains  of  the  gallant  dead,  its  enlarging 
circles  alone  indicating  the  spot  where  he  had  fallen  ;  seem- 
ing emblematic,  I  thought,  as  they  widened  and  widened 
into  infinite  space,  of  that  eternity  to  which  we  had  con- 
signed him.  It  was  a  moment  full  of  touching  solemnity;  a 
deep  stillness  prevailed  on  board,  broken  only  by  the  ripple 
of  the  waves.  I  could  see  that  the  captain's  eye  was  moist- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  241 

ened  by  the  expression  of  an  unwonted  feeling,  and  I 
thought  that  there  were  few  of  the  spectators  who  did  not 
share  an  honorable  sympathy  with  the  old  commander. 

When  we  had  separated,  and  returned  to  our  respective 
ships,  the  conversation  of  the  gun-room  mainly  turned  upon 
the  events  of  the  morning. 

"  Did  you  never  see  a  man  hove  overboard  before,  young- 
ster ?"  inquired  Staunton,  with  a  want  of  feeling  which,  from 
that  time  forth,  by  no  means  tended  to  elevate  him  in  my 
good  opinion. 

"  No,  I  never  saw  a  man  buried  at  sea  before.  It  seems 
to  me  a  much  more  inferior  ceremony  than  any  other  de- 
scription of  funeral  could  be." 

"Well,"  said  Hamilton,  "I  would  rather  rest  down 
among  the  coral  rocks,  and  the  great  old  wrecks,  at  the 
bottom  of  the  sea,  and  have  all  kinds  of  quaint  monsters  of 
the  deep  eyeing  me  cunningly  as  I  lay  in  my  hammock,  than 
have  the  snuggest  monument  in  Westminster  Abbey." 

"Well,  so  would  I." 

"  In  a  word,"  said  Staunton,  "  you  would  rather  be  food 
for  the  fishes  than  the  worms.  Well,  perhaps  you  are  nearly 
about  right ;  I  shall  not  argue  the  subject  with  you." 

"  I  think  a  common  seaman's  burial  is  the  best  of  all." 

"  How  does  it  differ  from  that  which  we  saw  this  morn- 
ing?" 

"  Why  not?  surely  there's  not  so  great  a  fuss  made  about 
it ;  but  only  mind,  it's  more  ship-shape  and  regular  like." 

"  Give  me  some  sort  of  notion,  if  you  can,  of  what  you 
mean." 

"  Oh,  if  we  are  out  here  much  longer,  you  may  have  an 
opportunity  of  seeing  it  for  yourself." 

"  But  I  should  like  to  know — don't  they  heave  them  over- 
board just  as  they  did  our  poor  fellows  who  were  killed  in 
action  ?" 


248  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

"Why,  yes,  to  be  sure  they  do;  but  afterwards  all  hands 
are  piped  to  grog,  and  everything  is  as  jolly  as  possible.7' 

"And,  therefore,  you  like  it  better.  Well,  you  are  a 
queer  fish,  that's  all  I  can  say  on  the  matter." 

"  Then  comes  the  sale  of  the  defunct's  effects,  which  are 
put  up  to  auction." 

"  Well,  that's  easily  disposed  of,  I  should  think." 

"The  men  are  then  mustered  at  divisions.  The  clerk 
brings  up  the  ship's  books,  and  marks  after  his  name  the 
letters  D.  D." 

"  What  does  that  mean  ?"  I  inquired. 

"What  a  muff  you  are,  to  be  sure — discharged  dead,  of 
course." 

"  You  don't  know  what  making  a  dead  man  chew  more 
tobacco  means,  I  suppose,  neither?' 

"  No  ;  tell  me,  by  all  means." 

"  Why,  you  see,  pursers  are  generally  the  most  infernal 
villains  on  the  face  of  the  earth  ;  they  are  worse  than  hotel 
waiters  or  schoolmasters ;  and  the  first  thing  the  purser 
does,  when  his  name  is  fairly  disposed  of,  is  to  chalk  up  to 
his  account  an  extra  pound  of  tobacco  or  so,  out  of  which 
he  afterwards  turns  a  little  profit  on  his  own  account." 

"  Well,  that  surprises  me,  I  must  confess.  Now  that 
you  mention  it,  I  do  remember  poor  Tom  Pipes  saying — " 

"  Yes,  the  villain  did  for  poor  Tom  ;  you  may  depend 
upon  it,  if  he  left  you  his  executor,  you'll  have  a  Flemish 
account  of  his  effects,  that  I  can  tell  you,"  said  Hamilton. 

In  conversation  of  this  kind  the  evening  passed  away ; 
and  when  the  master-at-arms  came  with  the  usual  order  for 
the  removal  of  the  lights,  I  was  not  sorry  to  be  left  alone, 
and  to  have  an  opportunity  of  pondering  in  silence  over  all 
that  I  had  heard  and  seen  that  day. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  249 

CHAPTER    IX. 
THE  CRUISE  OF  THE  IDA  DRAWS  TO  A  CLOSE. 

As  far  as  the  war  was  concerned,  it  was  looked  upon  as 
decided  by  the  important  conquest  I  have  described  in  the 
last  chapter.  The  tone  of  the  government  began  consider- 
ably to  moderate  ;  we  had  stricken  terror  into  the  heart  of 
the  nation,  while  the  moderation  with  which  we  used  our 
power  inspired  them  with  a  feeling  of  confidence  such  as 
they  had  not  previously  entertained.  After  the  action  at 
Chapoo,  overtures  of  a  pacific  nature  were  made,  which  were 
repeated  with  more  earnestness  as  each  subsequent  success 
of  our  arms  showed  the  Chinese  the  utter  futility  of  further 
resistance. 

Towards  the  commencement  of  June,  the  whole  of  the 
fleet  bore  up  for  the  entrance  of  the  Yangtze  river,  with  a 
view  to  operations  against  the  capital  of  Shanghai ;  but  our 
progress  was  considerably  retarded  by  the  tides,  which  were 
flowing  against  us  with  great  velocity  and  strength.  It 
was  during  this  passage  that  one  of  those  disastrous  events 
occurred  incident  to  a  sailor's  career,  and  against  which  no 
skill  is  of  any  avail. 

"A  man  overboard  !"  was  the  cry  which,  caught  from 
one  of  the  crew  to  another,  startled  me  as  I  was  reading 
one  morning  in  the  gun-room.  I  was  instantly  upon  deck, 
where  I  was  soon  informed  of  the  cause  of  the  accident. 
It  appeared  that  about  two  o'clock  some  hands  had  been 
ordered  to  reef  topsails  ;  the  rigging  was  instantaneously 
crowded  by  the  seamen,  each  vieing  with  the  other  who 
should  be  first.  Meanwhile  the  weather  topsails  had  been 
rounded  in,  and  when  the  canvas  filled  to  the  wind, 
11* 


250  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Lower  away  the  topsails  !"  sung  out  the  first  lieutenant 
through  a  trumpet. 

The  order  was  executed  almost  as  soon  as  it  had  been 
given,  and  the  braces  having  been  belayed,  again  the  word 
of  command  was  uttered : 

"  Trice  up— lay  out !» 

The  men  were  soon  all  on  the  yards  ;  the  reef  tackles 
were  hauled  out,  and  the  order  given  to  take  in  a  single 
reef.  It  was  just  at  this  crisis,  when  the  men  were  out  on 
the  yards,  that  a  sudden  gust  of  wind,  filling  the  main-top- 
sail, carried  away  the  brace.  The  yard,  relieved  from  re- 
straint, flew  fore  and  aft,  and  three  men  were  flung  over- 
board, two  of  whom  never  appeared  again  ;  they  were 
probably  killed  by  the  fall ;  but  the  third,  a  lusty  seaman, 
was  soon  observed  to  reappear,  battling  manfully  with  the 
waves.  The  ship  had  not  much  way  on  her  at  the  time, 
and  the  deck  was  instantly  crowded  with  men  anxious  to 
render  all  the  assistance  in  their  power  to  their  messmate. 
The  cutters  were  unfortunately  covered,  in  order  to  protect 
them  from  the  burning  rays  of  the  sun  ;  but  the  launch  was 
soon  afloat.  The  men  cheered  lustily  to  the  struggling 
swimmer,  whose  efforts  to  keep  himself  afloat  seemed  now  to 
have  nearly  exhausted  his  strength. 

"  Give  way,  my  lads,  give  way  1"  thundered  the  captain. 

The  boat's  crew  plied  their  oars  a  few  minutes,  and  they 
were  at  the  spot  just  as  the  head  of  their  messmate  dissap- 
peared  beneath  the  surface. 

"  He's  gone,  by  G — d  !"  said  old  Deadeye. 

"  Hurrah  I  no,  he  has  him  !"  sung  out  the  first  lieutenant, 
and  the  whole  of  the  ship's  company  gave  three  hearty 
cheers  as  the  bowman,  who  had  plunged  neck  and  shoulders 
into  the  water,  was  observed  drawing  himself  up  :  he  had 
succeeded  in  getting  the  boat-hook  into  the  clothes  of  the 
drowning  man,  who  was  soon  safe  on  board  ;  but  so  com- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  251 

pletely  exhausted  was  his  condition  that  we  were  obliged  to 
call  for  the  aid  of  the  surgeon  before  he  could  be  resuscitated. 

"  Well  for  you  there  were  no  sharks  about,"  said  Dead- 
eye,  when  the  man  had  recovered. 

"Why,  yes,  your  honor  ;  I  should  have  been  in  kingdom 
come  by  this  time,  as  the  ship's  chaplain  would  say." 

"  You  would  have  been  in  a  shark's  belly  in  the  mean- 
time," said  the  first  lieutenant,  who,  as  I  have  already  inti- 
mated, set  up  for  being  a  wit  in  a  small  way.  "  You  have 
been  saved,  Bill  Jones,  from  going  to  Davy  Jones's  locker," 
he  added  ;  "you  shall  therefore  have  a  double  allowance  of 
grog  if  the  doctor  thinks  it  good  for  you,  and  now  you  may 
turn  in  and  take  a  snooze  if  you  like." 

I  shall  not  pause  in  my  narrative  to  do  more  than  briefly 
glance  at  the  subsequent  events,  which  followed  in  such 
quick  succession,  that  the  war  was  speedily  brought  to  a 
close,  after  the  fall  of  Woosung,  in  which  we  took  our  usual 
prominent  part.  Shanghai  was  the  scene  of  our  next  hostile 
operations.  At  the  latter  place  the  conflict  was  main- 
tained, on  the  part  of  the  enemy,  with  a  determination 
which,  considering  the  heavy  losses  they  had  sustained  in 
the  former  actions,  was  truly  wonderful.  The  Tartars,  in 
particular,  fought  with  a  desperate  valor.  They  were  in 
general  men  of  fine  athletic  frames,  and  masters  in  the  use 
of  their  weapons ;  had  they  been  only  armed  with  the  Brit- 
ish bayonet,  the  result  of  the  conflict  would,  in  all  proba- 
bility, have  been  very  different ;  but  undisciplined  valor, 
however  chivalrous,  can  avail  but  little  against  trained  sol- 
diers. Many  of  the  Tartars  rushed  furiously  upon  the  bayo- 
nets of  their  assailants.  In  some  instances  they  even  suc- 
ceeded in  penetrating  the  soldiers'  guard,  and,  seizing  them 
by  the  body,  would  drag  them  over  the  walls.  In  sword 
combats,  or  personal  encounters  of  any  kind,  their  prowess 
was  unrivalled;  and  many  a  British  soldier  bears  on  his 


252  SWELL  LIFE   AT  SEA;   OR, 

person,  to  this  day,  memorable  marks  attesting  the  ardu- 
ous nature  of  the  encounter  with  these  barbarian  tribes. 
The  attempt  to  open  negotiations,  on  the  part  of  the  Chi- 
nese commissioners,  had  been  repeatedly  made,  but,  as  we 
thought  they  had  not  been  able  to  show  that  they  had  full 
authority  from  the  Emperor  to  treat  for  peace,  all  overtures 
were  positively  declined.  At  length,  as  our  forces  lay  be- 
fore Nankin,  and  very  formidable  preparations  had  been 
made  for  the  attack,  only  three  days  before  it  was  to  com- 
mence, the  Chinese  commissioners  signified  that  they  had 
full  authority  from  the  Emperor  to  treat  for  peace.  The 
attack  was  therefore  delayed  until  a  meeting  could  take 
place,  which  was  held  at  a  temple  on  shore,  in  the  southern 
suburbs  of  the  city.  The  Emperor's  commission  being  pro- 
duced, was  examined  by  competent  persons,  and  pronounced 
to  be  satisfactory.  A  treaty,  upon  our  part,  was  submitted 
to  them,  and,  after  considerable  delay  and  much  diplomatic 
acuteness,  the  Emperor's  full  assent  was  received,  and  the 
signature  of  the  document  took  place,  with  considerable 
solemnity,  on  board  of  the  Cornwallis — the  venerable  com- 
missioner, Elepo,  attending  on  behalf  of  his  Imperial  Ma- 
jesty, and  a  number  of  officers  of  high  rank  being  at  the 
same  time  in  waiting,  to  witness  the  signature  of  the  British 
plenipotentiary.  The  war  was  now  over,  and,  in  the  month 
of  December,  we  took  our  departure,  and  soon  afterwards 
bid  a  final  adieu  to  China. 

One  of  my  favorite  modes  of  killing  time,  during  the  long 
voyage  which  ensued,  was  by  taking  a  book  up  to  the  top, 
and  spreading  the  top-gallant  sail  into  a  canvas  couch.     I 
was  occupied  in  this  way  one  morning,  when  the  captain  of 
the  top  shouted  out  with  the  voice  of  a  Stentor  : 
"  Deck  ahoy  !  a  sail  on  the  weather-quarter." 
On  hearing  this,  the  officer  of  the  watch  ordered  the  sig- 
nal midshipman  to  the  masthead,  to  ascertain  of  what  size 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  253 

and  nature  the  stranger  was.  With  the  aid  of  a  telescope, 
it  was  descried  to  be  a  squadron  of  five  frigates,  not  Eng- 
lish. 

The  news  flew  like  wildfire  throughout  the  ship,  and  I 
hastened  down  to  glean  further  intelligence. 

"  Mr.  Staunton,1'  said  the  captain,  "  what  do  you  take 
those  vessels  to  be  1" 

"  They  look  most  like  French,  I  should  say." 

"Why,  so  they  do.  But  their  rigging  is  scarcely  trim 
enough  for  Frenchmen." 

"  They  may  be  Dutch  or  Portuguese." 

"  No,  they  are  French  hulls  to  a  certainty.  Who  rigged 
them  is  another  matter." 

After  some  further  discussion,  it  was  decided  that  the  ship 
should  be  cleared  for  action,  in  case  the  strange  sails  should 
prove  to  be  an  enemy — though  what  enemy,  for  we  were 
then  at  peace  with  all  the  world,  with  the  exception  of  a 
slave  ship,  old  Deadeye  expected  to  meet,  was  a  question 
none  of  us  could  solve. 

The  decks  having  been  cleared  accordingly,  and  the  men 
reported  ready  at  their  stations,  old  Deadeye  took  another 
long  look  through  his  glass,  and  when  he  had  finished  his 
inspection,  his  aspect  looked  more  puzzled  than  ever. 

"  I  can't,  for  the  life  of  me,  make  them  out,"  he  said, 
turning  to  Morris,  who  stood  near. 

"  Fm  d— -d  if  I  can  either,"  was  the  reply. 

"  I  wish  you  would  give  up  that  profane  habit  -  of  yours, 
sir  ;  it's  blasphemy,  positive  blasphemy  ;  by  the  Lord  it  is  1" 
growled  Deadeye. 

It  was  now  nearly  nine  o'clock,  and  grew  so  dark  that 
the  vessels  could  scarcely  be  distinguished ;  but  enough 
light  remained  to  display  the  rugged  faces  of  the  Ida's  men 
as  they  thronged  the  quarter-deck.  Deadeye  stood  on  the 
skylight  gratings,  slightly  elevated  above  the  rest.  Around 


254  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

him  were  piled  shot  of  every  description,  muskets,  cutlasses, 
pistols,  and  bayonets,  with  every  other  requisite  for  com- 
mencement of  the  fray.  He  was  in  the  highest  possible 
spirits,  and  evidently  itching  to  get  at  some  one,  no  matter 
who  it  should  be.  Towards  eight  o'clock,  a  thick  fog  came 
on,  which  shut  out  the  enemy  from  all  further  observation. 
There  was  neither  moon  nor  stars,  and  but  little  wind.  We 
were  gohig  through  the  water  at.  the  rate  of  about  five 
knots  an  hour.  So  far,  all  was  well.  Deadeye  was  still 
peering  through  his  night-glass,  when,  with  a  sudden  oath, 
he  let  it  fall  on  the  deck. 

"  A  large  press  of  sail  close  on  the  weather-beam  !"  he 
said. 

To  advance  further  in  our  present  course  would  have  been 
to  show  our  stern  to  the  enemy ;  he  therefore  shortened 
sail,  and  prepared  to  heave  to.  It  was  Hamilton's  turn  to 
be  on  deck,  and  I,  as  usual,  was  close  beside  him. 

"  Main  deck  there  !"  shouted  Captain  Deadeye  through 
his  trumpet. 

"  Sir  ?" 

"  Take  care  that  not  a  port  is  opened  till  I  order.  Every 
one  but  the  captains  of  the  guns  to  lie  down,  and  keep  si- 
lence." 

Slowly  the  strange  sails  were  seen  looming  through  the 
mist ;  they  were  now  close  to  us  ;  yet  nothing  more  than  a 
huge  towering  mass  of  canvas  could  be  seen,  so  thick 
was  the  fog ;  he  concluded  it  was  a  foreign  frigate,  though 
of  what  nation  it  would  be  hard  to  tell. 

"  Down  with  the  main-deck  ports,  and  stand  by  to  fire. 
Man  the  larboard  fore  and  main  braces.  Port  your  helm, 
and  brace  up  !" 

As  the  captain  uttered  these  words,  the  ship's  head  was 
laid  nearer  to  the  wind,  so  as  to  intercept  the  frigate  as  she 


FUN,  FRIGATES.  AND   YACHTING.  255 

advanced  upon  us.  Another  minute,  and  we  should  have 
been  in  a  desirable  position  to  open  the  ball. 

Deadeye  was  walking  to  and  fro,  with  rapid  strides,  on 
the  quarter-deck,  waiting  for  the  proper  time  to  pour  in  a 
broadside,  and  his  empty  sleeve  was  working  to  and  fro 
with  its  accustomed  alacrity  when  he  had  any  business  on 
hand. 

"  Now,  then,  by  G — d  !  (he  forgot  his  horror  of  swear- 
ing when  any  constraint  was  upon  him,)  ready  on  the  main- 
deck." 

But  before  he  could  complete  the  order,  or  the  men  obey 
it,  a  voice  exclaimed  from  the  approaching  enemy,  in  good 
round  English — 

"  Ship  ahoy,  there  !" 

A  mingled  exclamation  of  surprise  ran  through  our  crew 
at  the  sound  ;  in  another  instant  our  broadside  would  have 
been  at  them. 

"  What  ship  is  that  ?"  sung  out  Deadeye. 

**  His  Majesty's  ship  Pluto,  Captain  Clewline." 

"  His  Majesty's  ship  Ida,  Captain  Deadeye." 

"  My  compliments  to  Captain  Deadeye,  and  I  shall  be 
glad  to  see  him  on  board,"  said  the  Pluto. 

But  Captain  Deadeye  was  in  no  humor  for  paying  visits 
that  evening ;  he  was  too  much  disappointed  at  being 
baulked  of  his  amusement,  so  he  trundled  down  stairs  in  the 
worst  of  all  possible  tempers,  saying,  as  he  did  so,  "  Let 
the  first  lieutenant  go,  and  Mr.  Staunton  get  my  cabin 
bulk-heads  up  again  ;  secure  the  guns  ;  give  me  my  supper, 
and  pipe  to  grog."  This  was  the  last  incident  of  any  note 
which  occurred  during  our  cruise. 

OLD  ENGLAND. 

I  must  pass  over  the  greater  portion  of  our  homeward 
voyage,  the  monotony  of  which  was  unbroken  by  any  inci- 


256  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA  ;   OR, 

dent  worth  recalling.  The  fresh  breezes  carried  us  bravely 
along  over  the  laughing  blue  waves  ;  the  foam  flew  from 
our  bows,  and  the  sails  strained  like  impatient  couriers  as 
the  good  ship  Ida  proceeded  on  her  way.  Early  one  fine 
morning,  as  I  was  pacing  the  decks  during  the  morning 
watch,  I  was  accosted  by  Hamilton,  who,  taking  me  to 
leeward,  asked  me  if  I  recognised  the  low  blue  line  of  coast 
which  was  rising  in  the  distance. 

"  It's  not  possible,  cannot  be  England  ?"  I  exclaimed,  as 
the  tears  started  to  my  eyes. 

"  Yes,  indeed,  it  is  ;  no  mistake  whatever  about  it." 

We  sped  rapidly  along  under  the  influence  of  a  favorable 
breeze ;  the  long  line  of  blue  coast  now  became  more  dis- 
tinctly visible,  and  at  length  we  saw  the  Isle  of  Wight 
looming  through  the  sultry  haze  of  a  summer's  morning : 
we  could  clearly  distinguish  the  white  cottages  scattered 
over  the  pretty  wooded  coast.  We  soon  saw  Portsmouth 
once '  more — rising  above  the  water's  edge  ;  and  towards 
evening  we  cast  anchor  beside  the  battery.  My  last  night 
on  board  was  a  jovial  one ;  but  I  cannot  stay  to  describe 
it,  nor  can  I  pause  to  linger  over  the  parting  with  my  old 
messmates.  When  it  becomes  necessary  to  leave  those  to 
whom  I  am  attached,  or  with  whom  I  have  been  long  asso- 
ciated, the  farewell  to  me  is  always  trying.  Hamilton 
affectionately  embraced  me  ;  the  rest  of  the  officers  shook 
me  cordially  by  the  hand  ;  old  Deadeye  gave  me  a  parting 
gripe,  prophesied  that  I  should  one  day  become  a  sailor, 
and  once  more  my  feet  were  on  terra  firma.  I  rested  that 
night  at  the  small  inn  at  Ashton,  and  on  the  following 
morning  proceeded  to  Plymouth,  where  I  arrived  in  due 
time  for  the  mail  which  was  to  convey  me  to  Redburn 
Hall. 

As  I  proceeded  rapidly  along  the  well-remembered  road, 
my  thoughts  reverted  to  the  day  upon  which  I  had  travelled 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  25t 

upon  it  last.  How  feelingly  did  each  incident  of  that  melan. 
choly  journey  arise  to  my  recollection  !  How  my  heart 
yearned  to  see  the  beloved  inmates  of  the  dear  old  Hall 
once  more  !  Towards  evening,  as  we  drew  near  Silverthorne, 
I  heard  the  distant  sounds  of  a  carriage  which  was  fast 
overtaking  us.  Turning  round  I  recognized  at  a  glance  my 
uncle's  livery.  My  heart  beat  so  rapidly  that  I  almost  lost 
my  breath.  I  could  see,  as  the  vehicle  whirled  by,  an 
elderly  man  of  stately  presence,  and  beside  him  a  young 
lady.  It  was  without  doubt  my  uncle  and  my  cousin. 
The  cloud  of  dust  which  followed  in  the  train  of  their 
equipage  had  nearly  subsided  when  the  carriage  seemed 
to  stop.  We  were  following  so  rapidly  that  we  soon  came 
up  to  the  spot,  and  I  then  saw  that  an  accident  of  some 
sort  had  happened  :  one  of  the  horses  was  down,  my  uncle 
had  jumped  out,  and  was  in  the  act  of  assisting  the  postil- 
ion as  we  drove  up.  I  called  to  the  coachman  to  stop, 
and,  getting  down  from  the  box-seat,  hastened  to  render 
any  assistance  which  was  in  my  power.  I  was  anxious  to 
avail  myself  of  so  favorable  an  opportunity  to  see  if  I  should 
be  recognised.  The  hors.e  which  had  fallen  was  plunging 
and  kicking  violently  among  the  traces.  I  cut  them  with 
a  clasp  knife  I  had  in  my  pocket,  and  secured  the  horse's 
head.  I  could  see  at  a  glance  that  I  was  unknown  to 
either  of  my  relatives.  It  was  growing  dark,  and  I  drew 
my  hat  over  my  eyes  as  I  asked  if  I  ^could  render  any  fur- 
ther assistance. 

"  Not  any,  thank  you ;  we  shall  do  very  well  now ;  we 
will  replace  the  fallen  horse  by  one  of  the  leaders,  and  get 
on  all  in  good  time." 

"  You  are  a  sailor,  I  see,"  said  my  cousin,  bending  forward 
from  the  carriage,  as  they  were  engaged  about  the  horses. 

"  Yis,  marm,"  said  I,  in  a  gruff  voice,  touching  my  hat. 

"  Where  have  you  served  ?" 


258  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  In  the  Chinese  war." 

"  Good  Heavens  1"  replied  Lucy,  with  a  $udden  start ; 
"  are  the  ships  returned  ?  We  have  had  no  intelligence 
about  them  as  yet." 

"Just  come  into  port,  ma'am,"  I  replied. 

"  What  was  the  name  of  your  ship?" 

But  before  I  could  reply,  my  uncle  had  resumed  his  seat, 
and  ordered  the  postilion  to  drive  on ;  not,  however,  before 
my  cousin  in  a  whisper  had  requested  me  to  call  at  Silver- 
thorne,  which  she  said  was  quite  close  at  hand,  a  fact  I 
knew  quite  as  well  as  she  did. 

The  coach  in  the  meantime  having  rolled  away,  I  was 
left  to  pursue  my  way  on  foot,  and  in  about  half  an  hour's 
time  I  drew  near  the  gate  of  the  well-known  park.  It  was 
open,  and  I  passed  on,  reaching  the  door  of  the  Hall  with- 
out meeting  any  one  by  whom  I  could  be  recognised.  I 
rang  the  bell,  having  previously  muffled  up  my  face  as  well 
as  I  could.  The  door  was  opened  by  a  strange  servant. 

"  I  suppose  you  are  the  young  man  Miss  Herbert  is  ex- 
pecting ?"  the  man  said ;  and  upon  my  answering  in  the 
affirmative,  he  added — 

"  Will  you  walk  this  way,  and  Fll  fetch  you  to  the  house- 
keeper's room." 

I  walked  after  him,  and  was  forthwith  transferred  to  the 
care  of  my  cousin's  maid,  who  informed  me  that  her  mis- 
tress was  waiting  for  me  in  the  library,  and  that  I  must 
take  care  and  wipe  riSy  feet  before  going  in. 

Thus  warned,  I  was  duly  ushered  into  the  old  library, 
where  I  found  my  cousin  seated  by  a  table  with  a  book  in 
her  hand,  and  occupied  in  gazing  pensively  into  the  fire. 
Her  beauty  exceeded  all  my  expectations. 

"I  wished  to  see  you,"  she  said  in  a  soft  low  voice,  "that 
I  might  hear  the  latest  news  from  China.  When  did  you 
arrive  ?" 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  259 

"  Only  yesterday,  madam,"  I  replied. 

"  What  ship  did  you  serve  in?" 

"  The  Ida,"  I  replied. 

"  Gracious  Heavens  !  then  he  must  be  come,"  she  ex- 
claimed, as  a  sudden  flush  mantled  her  neck  and  brow. 

"  The  Ida  !  did  you  know  an  officer  called  Charles  Her- 
bert ?" 

"  Yes,  madam  ;  very  well." 

"  Do  you  know  if  he  is  safe  and  well  ?" 

I  had  the  cold-blooded  cruelty  to  answer  with  great  com- 
posure, that  I  believed  he  was  very  ill,  and  confined  to  his 
berth  with  fever  ;  but  I  was  soon  punished  for  my  wicked- 
ness by  seeing  the  sudden  pallor  that  overcame  the  lovely 
countenance  before  me. 

"Not  dangerously  ill,  not  dangerously,  I  trust?"  my 
cousin  said  in  a  tremulous  tone. 

"  Why  no,  madam ;  I  don't  believe  he  is  so  very  bad, 
neither." 

There  was  something  in  the  tone  of  the  last  sentence  I 
uttered  which  caused  jny  cousin  to  turn  round.  She  had 
been  sitting  in  an  oblique  direction,  and  I  was  keeping  as 
much  behind  her  as  possible  to  escape  observation.  She 
gave  me  a  penetrating  look  as  she  said  in  reply — 

"Who  are  you?" 

"  Take  a  good  look,  and  you  will  see,"  I  replied,  tearing 
away  the  covering  which  had  concealed  the  lower  part  of 
my  face. 

In  a  moment  we  were  in  each  other's  arms,  and  our  lips 
met  in  a  long  and  ardent  kiss.  "But  I  must  tell  the 
others,"  she  said,  springing  to  the  door  of  the  dining-room, 
which  I  knew  communicated  with  the  library. 

"  Papa !  Uncle  Herbert  is  come  ! — he  is  safe  ! — he  is 
here  1"  she  said. 

"  Come  ?  who  ?  what,  my  love,  have  you  lost  your  senses  ?" 


260  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA,  ETC. 

replied  the  measured  accents  of  each  known  voice,  and  in 
another  instant  I  was  locked  in  my  father's  arms.  He  had 
been  over  to  dine  that  day  at  Silverthorne,  and  the  sudden 
surprise  almost  startled  him  out  of  his  wonted  equanimity. 

"  Good  Heavens  !  who  could  have  dreamt  it  ?"  he  said, 
taking  off  his  spectacles,  and  pausing  to  have  a  longer  look 
at  me.  "  How  the  boy  is  altered.  How  like  his  mother  he 
is.  She'll  hardly  know  you,  Charley.  You  have  grown  as 
brown  as  a  berry,  and  your  hair  is  a  shade  or  two  darker. 
Why,  God  bless  me,  my  boy,  but  this  is  indeed  an  unex- 
pected pleasure." 

"  Let  me  have  a  turn  at  him  now,"  said  my  uncle  ;  "  but 
had  you  not  better  all  come  into  the  dining-room  ?  there  is  a 
better  light  there,  and  we'll  get  up  the  dinner  in  a  moment." 

Once  more  I  found  myself  seated  at  my  uncle's  table. 
Many  and  particular  were  the  inquiries  made  as  to  my  ad- 
ventures, and  that  evening,  I  believe,  I  talked  more  than  I 
had  done  during  the  whole  time  I  was  away.  Nothing 
could  satisfy  my  cousin's  longing  to  hear  every  circumstance 
connected  with  the  war  and  my  experiences  of  seafaring  life, 
and  at  any  allusion  I  made  to  the  dangers  we  had  run — 
which  I  had  the  good  fortune  to  escape — I  saw  a  shudder 
creep  over  her  frame,  or  a  tear  start  to  her  eyes.  We  did  not 
separate  until  it  was  long  after  midnight,  and  my  father  had 
finished  another  bottle  of  the  favorite  port  with  the  yellow 
seal.  When  I  turned  in,  I  dreamt  I  was  once  more  back  in 
the  old  ship  ;  and  I  wakened,  I  remember,  wondering  how 
the  deuce  I  had  got  stowed  away  in  so  comfortable  a  berth. 

I  have  now  arrived  at  the  last  page  of  my  log.  It  only 
remains  for  me  to  say  that,  within  a  year  from  the  day  of 
my  arrival,  I  had  received  my  commission  as  a  lieutenant ; 
but  I  have  never  been  afloat  since,  for,  shortly  afterwards, 
I  married  my  beautiful  cousin,  and  once  more  the  hearth  of 
the  old  Hall  burns  with  its  wonted  splendor. 


HOMEWARD    BOUND. 


SIT  ye  down  here,  my  lads,"  said  Bill  Sykes,  the  mate 
of  the  Juno,  as  he  turned  a  quid  of  tobacco  in  his 
mouth,  and  hitched  up  his  trousers.     "  Sit  ye  down  here, 
while  I  twist  you  this  'ere  yarn. 

"  We  may  be  a-going  into  action,  or  we  may  not ;  that 
no  mortal  can  tell — not  even  the  skipper  himself — and  we 
may  be  licked,  although  that  is  far  from  likely ;  but  one 
thing  is  certain — whenever  sailors  give  up  'baccy  and  three- 
finger  grog,  and  sing  no  more  songs,  we  lose  our  superiority. 
We'll  be  swept  off  the  face  of  the  sea  as  clean  as  the  deck  at 
seven  bells,  that  we  shall,  or  my  name  aint  Sykes  ;"  and  hav- 
ing uttered  this  oracular  preamble,  the  veteran  tar  refreshed 
himself  with  some  new  tobacco,  smote  his  thigh  with  one 
brawny  hand,  by  way  of  adding  emphasis  to  his  assertion, 
and  looked  to  his  auditors  as  if  awaiting  a  reply. 

"  But  where's  the  yarn  you  promised,  Bill — that  aint  it, 
surely  ?"  said  one  of  them. 

"By  no  manner  of  means.  I  was  a  comin'  to  it,  pre- 
sently. It  is  many  a  year  ago  now,  since  I  sailed  in  the 
Semiramis  on  the  East  India  station.  She  was  French 
built,  but  had  been  captured  in  the  war,  and  did  duty  as  an 
English  frigate — and  a  stunner  she  was,  let  me  tell  you. 
Well,  there  was  in  the  enemy's  squadron,  a  vessel  as  was 
well  known.  She  was  called  the  Yictorieuse,  or  some  such 
name.  She  measured  fourteen  hundred  tons,  and  mounted 
fifty-two  guns,  or  there-away.  She  was  always  at  some 


262  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

devilment  or  another,  here,  there,  and  everywhere  she  was 
not  wanted.  Her  captain  was  as  big  a  devil  as  his  ship.  I 
forget  his  name  now — nor  is  it  of  any  great  matter,  as  re- 
gards the  story. 

"  This  here  vessel,  you  see,  my  lads,  was  big  enough  to 
have  stowed  the  poor  Semiramis  away ;  and  when  one  of 
the  officers  of  the  Yictorieuse,  chancing  to  come  on  board, 
heard  we  were  going  out  to  the  Eastern  station,  he  whistled, 
and  said  something  which  the  first  lieutenant,  who  under- 
stood his  lingo,  said  was  very  like  he  could  eat  us  without 
salt,  or  some  chaff  of  the  kind.  Well,  my  lads,  to  sea  we 
went,  when  the  time  came,  and  we  sailed  for  the  Madras 
roads,  where  we  expected  to  find  this  wonderful  Frenchman. 
She  had  played  the  devil  among  the  Indiamen,  and  gener- 
ally, every  Saturday  night,  we  would  get  together  and  sing 
the  youngsters  a  song,  and  tell  them  what  sort  of  work  was 
before  them.  When  we  got  alongside  this  skyscraping  son 
of  a  wretch,  the  Yictorieuse,  which  we  were  a-looking  after, 
then  the  boys  would  gather  round  about,  and  every  mother's 
son  of  them  would  cock  up  their  ears  like  the  mate  of  the 
deck  when  grog-ahoy  is  the  word.  There  is  no  doubt  about 
it,  that  these  yarns,  when  they're  not  over  long,  keep  up  the 
pluck  of  the  service,  and  no  mistake  about  it.  As  I  was 
saying,  the  night  was  dark,  and  the  wind  was  rising ;  we 
were  on  the  larboard  tack,  standing  under  easy  courses, 
close  hauled,  looking  a  little  to  the  south-west,  when  the 
look-out  reported  some  flashes,  which,  although  they  were 
not  unlike  lightning,  looked  more  like  guns,  I  can  tell  you. 
The  fact  being  duly  reported  to  our  skipper, — it  was  then 
about  nine  o'clock, — he  says  to  the  first  lieutenant,  'Mr. 
Clewline/  says  he,  '  I  think  it  would  be  quite  as  well  if  we 
were  to  put  on  a  little  more  sail,  and  bear  down  in  the  di- 
rection of  those  queer  looking  lights,  just  for  the  fun  of  the 
thing,  to  find  out  what  they  are,  if  we  can.' 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  263 

"  '  The  lightning  has  come  to  an  anchor.  I  don't  see  no 
more  of  it  now/  said  the  signal-man  from  his  station. 

"  '  No  matter ;  tear  away  in  the  direction  it  came  from  ; 
put  out  every  light ;  beat  to  quarters,  and  let  everything  be 
ready  for  action/  said  the  skipper,  as  he  turned  down  the 
cabin  stairs. 

"  We  made  as  much  sail  as  we  could,  passed  round  on 
the  starboard  tack  with  top-gallant  sails  flying,  and  went 
right  smack  for  the  spot  where  the  lights  had  last  been 
seen  ;  and  sure  enough,  we  saw,  looming  large  through  the 
fog,  a  tremendous  French  man-of-war. 

"  '  That's  him,  by  jingo  !'  said  the  captain,  who  had  re- 
turned to  the  main-deck,  where  he  stood  with  the  night- 
glass  in  his  hand. 

"  '  I'm  d — d  if  there  isn't  another — two — three  of  them/ 
said  the  first  lieutenant.  '  Don't  you  see  them  bearing  up 
to  the  leeward  ?' 

"'  Nothing  of  the  kind — it's  only  the  fog/  replied  the 
skipper. 

"  '  Three  sails  to  the  leeward/  sang  out  the  signal-man. 

"  '  By  the  powers  of  war,  what  you  say  is  true  !  We're 
in  for  it  now  P  said  the  skipper. 

"  And  in  for  it  we  were.  To  run  away,  if  we  had  been 
disposed  for  such  an  amusement,  was  out  of  the  question. 
It  was  too  late  for  any  such  evolution.  The  three  vessels, 
as  they  drew  nearer,  were  evidently  on  the  same  tack  as  we 
were  ;  and  so,  about  midnight,  when  we  ought  to  have  been 
turning  in,  all  hands  stood  at  quarters — many  a  man  of  them 
never  to  turn  in  no  more — but  this  talking  is  dry  work. 
Hand  me  the  can  of  grog  before  I  go  any  further.  When 
I  have  wet  my  whistle  you  shall  have  the  end  of  my  yarn. 

"  If  a  single  man  on  board  the  Semiramis  had  been  dis- 
posed to  show  the  white  feather,  then  was  the  time  for  doing 
it,"  continued  the  old  tar,  wiping  his  mouth  with  the  back 


264  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

of  his  hand,  and  biting  off  the  end  of  a  fresh  quid.  "  Then 
was  the  time,  I  say  ;  for  the  moon  came  out  splendid,  as  if 
to  show  us  whereabouts  we  were.  Three  spanking  French 
men-of-war  were  close  athwart  our  beam ;  the  biggest  of 
them,  the  far-famed  Yictorieuse,  within  a  couple  of  musket 
shots  off." 

"  'Now,  my  men,  are  you  all  ready  ¥  said  the  skipper. 
1  Not  a  shot  until  I  give  the  word.' 

"  '  Ay,  ay,  sir/  said  the  captain  of  the  nearest  gun. 

"  '*  Man  the  fore-tops.  Look  sharp,  then  up  with  the 
helm.7 

"The  requisite  manoeuvre  having  been  performed,  we 
passed  "lose  under  the  enemy's  stern,  so  near  that  we  barely 
cleared  her,  and  as  we  passed,  the  whole  of  our  broadside 
went  slap  into  her.  We  then  came  short  ronnd  on  the  lar- 
board tack,  and  gave  them  another  stunner  of  grape.  It  was 
now  nearly  one  o'clock.  The  moon  was  shining  beautifully, 
and  we  went  at  it  fairly,  broadside  to  broadside,  blazing 
away,  as  hard  as  we  could,  until  the  guns  became  too  hot  to 
load.  The  Yictorieuse  had  evidently  found  she  had  caught 
a  Tartar ;  her  fire  began  to  slacken,  and  one  of  her  masts 
went  by  the  board.  The  sea  was  now  nearly  calm.  We 
were  close  alongside,  and  the  skipper,  putting  his  speaking- 
trumpet  to  his  lips,  summoned  them  to  surrender. 

"  There  was  no  answer,  all  was  silent  as  the  grave. 

"  '  Why  don't  you  speak,  and  be  d — d  to  you  ?'  sung  out 
the  skipper  again. 

"  There  was  still  no  reply. 

"  '  Give  them  another  broadside,  my  lads,  and  see  if  that 
will  find  them  any  voice.' 

"  At  it  we  went  again,  but  they  never  returned  a  single 
shot. 

"  '  Avast  firing,  and  silence  on  the  main-deck,'  and  again 
the  skipper  tried  the  speaking  trumpet  without  the  least 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  265 

effect.  We  could  hear  the  men  jabbering  and  chattering 
like  a  parcel  of  monkeys  caught  in  a  cocoa-nut  tree  ;  but 
there  was  neither  voice  nor  sound,  until,  all  of  a  sudden, 
there  was  a  rush  aloft  to  set  any  sails  that  remained  unhurt 
by  our  shot. 

" '  Loose  top-sails,  run  the  foreclew  garnets,  give  them 
another  broadside,'  shouted  the  skipper,  who  had  no  inten- 
tion in  the  world  of  letting  such  a  prize  out  of  his  clutches. 

"  There  was  evidently  great  confusion  on  board  of  the 
Frenchman,  while  but  few  of  our  men  had  been  hurt.  We 
were  quite  steady,  and  had  our  sails  out  before  the  enemy 
could  hoist  a  square  yard  of  canvas. 

" '  Cast  out  the  grappling  irons — -and  ready  with  the 
boarders  forward !'  sung  out  the  skipper. 

"  A  few  minutes  more,  and  the  vessels  were  in  contact ; 
the  irons  did  their  work,  and  fifty  picked  men,  with  the  first 
lieutenant  at  their  head,, were  thrown  upon  the  Frenchman's 
deck.  Ten  minutes'  stiff  work  did  the  business ;  three  hearty 
cheers,  and  down  went  the  tri-colored  flag — the  renowned 
Yictorieuse  was  our  prize.  When  morning  broke,  there 
were  the  dead  and  wounded  lying  about  their  decks.  I 
won't  for  many  a  long  day  forget  the  sight.  Some  were 
moaning  and  crying  for  water,  while  many  of  their  ship- 
mates were  found  down  below,  stowing  away  all  the  money 
they  could  find  in  their  pockets,  and  clapping  two  suits  of 
rigging  over  their  mast-heads.  Yictorieuse  had  lost  two  of 
his  lower  masts,  the  bowsprit  was  lopped  clean  off,  and  sel- 
dom, since  the  time  when  Admiral  Noah  went  to  sea  in  his 
ark,  was  there  ever  a  ship  afloat  more  like  his  own.  On 
the  topsails  of  the  Frenchman,  you  might  have  counted 
hundreds  of  musket  balls,  for  a  detachment  of  an  Irish  regi- 
ment we  had  on  board,  had  blazed  away  pretty  cleverly,  let 
me  tell  you.  And  now,  my  lads,"  continued  the  old  tar,  "  my 
yarn  is  ended,  I  hope  you  will  lay  the  story  to  heart ;  be- 

J2 


266  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

fore  this  time  to-morrow  we  may  be  in  action  ourselves,  and 
if  you  only  work  the  enemy  as  well  as  we  did  the  old  Yic- 
torieuse,  there  will  be  no  end  of  prize-money." 

"  But  what  of  the  two  other  vessels  that  were  bearing 
down  upon  you,  Bill  ?"  inquired  a  brother  seaman  who 
stood  by,  a  not  inattentive  auditor. 

"  I'll  tell  you  the  rest  another  time  ;  have  you  not  had 
enough  ?  Now  I  shall  turn  in,"  replied  the  old  seaman, 
parrying  the  question,  and  moving  off  to  his  hammock. 

"  Fll  tell  you  what  it  is,  messmates,"  said  the  questioner, 
"if  I  believe  one  word  of  all  that  gammon,  may  I  be  a 
soured  gurnet." 

While  this  emanation  was  going  on,  during  one  of  the 
night  watches,  the  Juno  was  standing,  with  all  sails  set,  in 
pursuit  of  two  strange  sails  which  had  been  signalled  to- 
wards night-fall,  bearing  to  the  south-east.  It  was  of 
course  impossible  to  ascertain  what  progress  had  been  made, 
until  the  approach  of  daylight,  but  nothing  could  exceed 
the  anxiety  both  of  officers  and  men  to  come  to  close  quar- 
ters with  the  enemy,  if  enemies  indeed  they  were.  The 
watches  were  thus  keeping  themselves  alive  by  spinning 
such  yarns  as  the  above,  and  were  waiting  with  anxiety  the 
approach  of  day.  In  the  meantime,  a  scene  somewhat  simi- 
lar was  being  enacted  in  the  gun-room,  where  the  younger 
portion  of  the  officers  were  whiling  away  the  tedious  hours 
that  must  intervene  before  the  appearance  of  daylight,  by 
a  narration  of  their  own  adventures.  The  scene  was  a  cu- 
rious one,  and  it  would  require  the  pen  of  a  Marryat  to  do 
it  any  adequate  justice.  A  small  lamp  suspended  from  the 
ceiling  served  to  make  the  darkness  visible,  and  threw  out 
into  strong  relief  the  figures  of  the  occupants  of  the  apart- 
ment. These  consisted  of  about  half-a-dozen  young  officers, 
who  were  sitting  in  every  imaginable  species  of  dishabille  at 
an  oblong  table,  which  was  covered  with  the  scattered  frag- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  261 

ments  of  a  frugal  meal ;  a  huge  bottle  of  rum,  flanked  by 
two  decanters  of  water,  stood  in  the  middle  of  the  board, 
but  the  consumption  of  the  purer  fluid  bore  apparently  but 
a  small  proportion  to  that  of  the  stimulating  beverage,  with 
which  it  was  slightly  diluted.  They  were  all  talking  at  the 
top  of  their  voices,  and  now  and  then  a  song  would  burst 
forth  from  some  uproarious  youngster,  less  remarkable  for 
the  musical  intonation  of  its  cadence,  than  for  the  vigorous 
melody  with  which  it  was  given  forth. 

"  Avast  your  squeaking  there,  we  have  had  enough  of 
it  1"  said  Walter  Long,  striking  the  table  with  his  fist,  un- 
til the  glasses  rang  again. 

"  You  have  no  ear  for  music,  Walter !  you  never  had 
from  the  time  of  your  infancy — in  short,  you  are  little  better 
than  a  savage." 

"  I  hope  to  be  one  to-morrow  if  we  get  into  action,"  was 
the  professional  reply. 

"  I  shouldn't  be  surprised,  if  after  the  first  shots  are  fired, 
you  are  found  skulking  in  the  after  cabin." 

"  Shouldn't  you,  my  boy  ?     I  should." 

"  Well,  then,  if  you  object  to  singing,  what  shall  we  do 
to  pass  away  the  time  ?  sleeping  is  out  of  the  question." 

"Tell  us  a  story,  no  matter  whether  it  is  true  or  not,  that 
is  of  no  importance,"  said  Walter  Long. 

"  Let  me  see — I  think  I  have  something  that  will  just 
suit  you  ;  it  has,  however,  the  disadvantage  of  being  founded 
on  fact,  being  the  authentic  account  of  how  my  old  mess- 
mate, Tom  Feather  Yane,  became  acquainted  with  the 
Griffiths,  into  which  family  he  afterwards  married." 

"  Let  us  hear  it  by  all  means,"  said  Walter  Long. 

"  The  introduction  of  Tom  Feather  Yane  to  the  paternal 
mansion  of  Laura  Griffiths,  runs  somewhat  whimsical,  and 
is  not  unworthy  of  recording,  as  forming  a  remarkable  ex- 
ception to  the  usual  '  modus  operand]/  by  means  of  which 


268  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;    OB, 

young  gentlemen  contrive  to  get  their  legs  under  respecta- 
ble mahogany.  The  hall-door  of  Mr.  Griffiths'  abode  was 
of  a  gay  pea-green  color,  and  the  knocker  of  brass,  bur- 
nished so  brightly  that  to  touch  it  was  suggestive  of  burned 
fingers.  This  ornament  had  attracted  the  notice  of  the  er- 
ratic Tom.  He  accordingly  seized  an  early  opportunity  of 
wrenching  it  off  and  conveying  it  home  in  his  pocket,  where 
it  formed  a  splendid  addition  to  a  collection  of  articles  of  a 
similar  kind  he  had  for  some  time  been  engaged  in  forming. 
But  as  Tom  passed  through  this  street  the  next  day,  he  saw 
the  absent  knocker  replaced  by  one  if  possible  of  a  still  more 
brilliant  appearance.  He  made  up  his  mind  at  once,  that  it 
too  should  follow  its  predecessor  ;  and  as  night-fall  came 
on,  he  returned  to  the  spot  for  the  felonious  object  he  had 
in  view.  But  as  he  was  engaged  in  the  very  act,  by  some 
unlucky  coincidence,  the  door  was  opened  by  Mr.  Griffiths, 
who,  as  he  emerged  from  his  dwelling  to  inhale  the  fresh- 
ness of  the  evening  air,  caught  Tom,  who  had  just  succeeded 
in  his  attempt,  with  the  knocker  in  his  hand.  An  exclama- 
tion of  astonishment,  followed  by  an  oath  and  a  blow  so 
well  planted,  that  Tom  rolled  down  the  area  steps,  was  the 
immediate  result  of  the  discovery.  Rolling  from  the  area, 
the  culprit  tumbled  into  the  kitchen  window,  which  chanced 
to  be  open,  greatly  to  the  astonishment  of  Mrs.  Nipper, 
the  cook,  who  was  sitting  tete-d-tete  over  a  quiet  dish  of  tea 
with  Tom  Jones,  her  follower.  The  gentleman's  arm  was 
round  the  lady's  waist  at  the  very  moment  when  the  in- 
truder, holding  the  new  brass  knocker  tightly  grasped  in 
his  hand,  made  his  unwelcome  entree. 

"  '  Lor',  good  gracious  me — fire  !  robbery  !  murder  1' 
screamed  Mrs.  Nipper,  at  the  top  of  her  voice. 

"  Thunder  and  turf !"  shouted  her  companion,  who  was 
a  native  of  the  Emerald  Isle. 

"  But  the  astonishment  of  the  lovers  was  as  nothing  to  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  269 

amazement  of  Tom  Feather  Yane.  He  had  only  recovered 
the  use  of  his  scattered  faculties,  when  the  voice  of  Mr. 
Griffiths  was  heard  in  the  passage,  and  his  heavy  step 
sounded  on  the  stairs. 

"  '  You  infernal  young  villain  !  The  second  knocker  in 
two  days  !  Punch  his  head  with  the  kitchen  poker,  until  I 
come,  Mrs.  Nipper,  if  you  please,  and  then  call  the  watch.7 
That  functionary  might  have  been  called,  but  I  question 
if  the  summons  would  have  been  attended  with  any  benefi- 
cial result,  as  he  was  fast  asleep  in  his  watch-box  round  the 
corner. 

"  When  Mrs.  Nipper  had  in  some  degree  recovered  from 
her  amazement,  her  thoughts  ran  less  upon  the  detention 
of  the  robber  than  the  concealment  of  the  '  follower/  who 
was  a  contraband  article  in  that  establishment.  '  Run  I' 
she  said,  '  run  !  Master  will  be  here  like  winking  !  Cut 
out  of  the  back  door — there's  time  yet  1' 

"  But  the  gentleman  thus  affectionately  appealed  to  was 
deaf  to  the  voice  of  his  charmer  ;  he  had  probably  indulged 
in  a  larger  potation  of  beer,  before  he  dropped  in  to  tea, 
than  usual ;  he  stood  stock  still,  staring  attentively  at  Mr. 
Feather  Yane,  with  the  knocker  in  his  hand,  and  at  his 
mistress.  The  few  minutes,  therefore,  that  were  left  to  him 
for  escape  were  thus  irrevocably  lost.  Presence  of  mind, 
however,  was  not  one  of  those  qualities  in  which  Tom 
Feather  Yane  was  ever  found  deficient.  He  saw,  at  a 
glance,  the  precise  posture  of  affairs,  and  that  no  time  was 
to  be  lost.  He  sprang  from  the  recumbent  posture  he  had 
hitherto  maintained,  and  hustling  up  to  the  bewildered  Mr. 
Jones,  thrust  into  his  pocket  the  spoil  of  which  he  had 
become  possessed,  and  passed  at  a  bound  out  through  the 
area  window,  at  the  very  moment  of  Mr.  Griffiths'  entrance 
into  the  kitchen.  '  You  infernal  robber  !  Have  you  stunned 
him  with  the  poker,  Mrs.  Nipper  ?'  shouted  the  angry  house- 


270  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

holder.  l  You  villain  !  I'll  have  yon  transported  for  this,  if 
there's  law  to  be  found  in  Southsea.  Where  is  my  new 
brass  knocker  ?  Give  it  up  this  instant.7 

"  '  Knocker,  your  honor  !'  responded  Jones.  '  Bedad,  sir, 
nothing  to  do  with  it ;  I  came  to  have  a  word  with  the 
cook.7 

"  'You  brazen  impostor,  I  caught  you  at  the  door.  I'll 
be  bound  you  have  it  somewhere  secreted  about  you.  Give 
up  the  knocker  this  moment,  or  I'll  knock  you  to  eternal 
smash.7 

"  '  Hands  off,  old  gentleman  ;  I'll  stand  none  of  that  non- 
sense. I  haven't  your  knocker,  as  I  knows  of — keep  your 
distance  !7 

"  But  the  blood  of  Mr.  Griffiths  was  now  going  at  fever 
heat.  He  squared  up  in  pugilistic  guise  at  the  intruder, 
who  squared  at  him  in  return.  A  blow  or  two  was  inter- 
changed, and  in  the  midst  of  this  skirmish  the  knocker  drop- 
ped out  of  Mr.  Jones's  pocket  upon  the  floor. 

"  '  I  told  you  you  had  it ;  surrender  to  the  law  I7  shouted 
Mr.  Griffiths,  springing  vigorously  on,  and  seizing  his  an- 
tagonist by  the  collar. 

"  'Be  aisy  now,  be  aisy,  and  I'll  akimpany  you,  since  you 
will  have  it  so  ;  but,  be  Jabers  !  I  could  knock  ye  to  pieces 
if  I  plaised ' 

"  '  Come  on,  you  villain,  none  of  your  bad  language.  Push 
him  behind,  Mrs.  Nipper  !  push  him  behind,  will  you,  and 
pick  up  the  knocker — there  it  is,  on  the  floor.'  But  Mrs. 
Nipper  seemed  as  one  deprived  alike  of  the  power  of  speech 
and  motion.  Her  faculties  had  become  paralyzed.  She 
stood  with  one  hand  pointing  through  the  open  window  by 
which  the  audacious  intruder  had  effected  his  escape,  and 
with  a  dish-cloth  in  the  other,  in  lieu,  it  is  presumed,  of  a 
pocket-handkerchief.  She  tried  to  speak,  but  could  not 
articulate  a  word.  Meanwhile,  old  Griffiths  swore,  and 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  271 

pulled,  and  shook  his  prisoner  to  and  fro — without  however 
being  able  to  prevail  upon  him  to  ascend  a  single  step  of 
the  stairs. 

"  Such  was  the  crisis  of  affairs,  when  a  violent  ringing 
was  heard  at  the  street  door.  '  Thank  Heaven,  there  is  the 
watch  !'  said  the  old  gentleman,  wiping  off  the  perspiration 
which  streamed  profusely  down  his  forehead. 

"'Help !  help  1  watch  !  watch  !  come  along,  you  ruffian. 
I'll  teach  you  to  steal  knockers,  that  I  will/  shouted  Mr. 
Griffiths,  tugging  energetically  at  his  captive.  Again  a 
precious  peal  sounded  at  the  area  bell. 

" l  Why  the  devil,  Mrs.  Nipper,  don't  you  go  and  open 
the  door  ?  what  the  deuce  do  you  stand  staring  there  for  ? 
Is  the  woman  a  fool  ?' 

"  Thus  objurgated,  away  went  Mrs.  Nipper.  She  sprang 
up  the  stairs,  and  flinging  open  the  door,  saw  Tom  Feather 
Yane,  who,  making  a  polite  bow,  inquired  if  her  master  was 
at  home. 

"  *  Yes,  sir,  he  is — but  no !  I  rather  think  he  is  particu- 
larly engaged  at  present.7 

"  'Give  him  my  card,  if  you  please,  and  say  I  wish  to 
speak  with  him  for  a  moment.' 

"  '  Halloa  !  come  here,  whoever  you  are,  come  here  1' 
shouted  Mr.  Griffiths  from  the  foot  of  the  stairs. 

"  In  obedience  to  this  summons,  Tom  walked  into  the 
passage  ;  but  no  sooner  had  the  light  of  the  lamp  fallen  upon 
his  features,  than  Mrs.  Nipper  recognised  the  gentleman 
who  had  interrupted  her  tete-d-tete  in  the  kitchen  a  short 
time  ago. 

"  '  Fire  !  robbery !  murder !  murder  !'  shouted  Mrs.  Nip- 
per, accentuating  the  last  syllable  to  give  it  greater  force. 

"  '  Thieves !  halloo!  let  me  at  'em  I  where  are  they?' 
shouted  Tom. 

"  '  Here  !  this  way  !    I  have  you  now,  you  villain  !'  sung 


272  SWELL   LIFE  AT  SEA;   OB, 

out  old  Mr.  Griffiths.  Tom  Feather  Yane  proceeded  ac- 
cordingly, without  taking  any  further  notice  of  Mrs.  Nipper, 
in  the  direction  of  the  voice. 

"  '  Happy  to  see  you,  sir  ;  help  me  to  hold  this  ruffian. 
I'm  quite  blown ' 

"  l  Hold  him — with  pleasure.  Has  he  been  stealing  the 
spoons  ?'  inquired  Tom  Feather  Yane. 

"  '  Spoons  1  no— my  new  brass  knocker.  We'll  bring 
him  to  the  police.  I  caught  him  with  it  in  his  pocket/ 

"  '  That  we  willr  by  Jingo  1'  shouted  Tom,  seizing  hold  of 
the  innocent  Jones  by  the  collar. 

"  'Now  then,  hold  him  tight  until  I  fetch  a  light.  Hal- 
loa !  Mrs.  Nipper  1  What  are  you  about  up  there  ? — a  can- 
dle— bring  a  candle/ 

"  '  You  vagabond  I  You  come  about  gentlemen's  houses 
stealing  their  knockers  1  I'll  give  you  a  lesson  you  won't 
forget  in  a  hurry — come  in  here,  you  shocking  reprobate  !'> — 
and  opening  the  kitchen  door,  Mr.  Feather  Yane  pushed  in 
his  captive,  while  the  enraptured  Mr.  Griffiths  proceeded  in 
quest  of  a  light. 

"  '  Punch  his  head  with  a  poker  if  he  attempts  to  stir/ 
shouted  Mr.  Griffiths  from  the  top  of  the  stairs. 

"  '  You  nincompoop  !'  said  Tom,  shaking  the  bewildered 
Jones  ;  '  why  don't  you  make  yourself  scarce  ?  Do  you  see 
that  open  window  ?  What  is  it  there  for,  you  idiot  ?  If 
I  were  to  let  you  go  now,  do  you  think  you  could  jump 
through  it  ?' 

"  '  I'll  try,'  said  the  man,  scratching  his  head. 

"  '  Be  off,  then,  like  a  lamplighter,  and  keep  your  own 
counsel,'  said  Tom,  letting  him  loose. 

"  Thus  released,  Jones,  the  follower,  without  waiting  to 
thank  his  captor,  sprang  through  the  open  window  ;  while 
Tom  shouted  as  loud  as  he  could  bawl,  '  Stop  him  I  stop 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  273 

him  !  the  villain  has  knocked  me  over.  He's  off  1  Stop 
him  !  stop  him  !' 

"  '  You  don't  mean  to  tell  me  you  have  let  the  rascal  go  !' 
inquired  the  old  gentleman,  as,  candle  in  hand,  he  reap- 
peared on  the  scene  of  action. 

"  '  Confound  him  1'  replied  Tom  ;  '  the  devil  couldn't  hold 
such  a  fellow  ;  the  very  instant,  sir,  you  left  me  alone  with 
him,  he  gave  me  a  thump  on  the  head,  which  quite  stunned 
me,  and  then  he  bolted  like  shot.7 

"  '  Blow  on  the  head,  my  dear  sir  ?  I  am  really  sincere- 
ly concerned  you  should  have  suffered  in  your  anxiety  to 
serve  me.  But,  bless  me  !  Why — yes,  you  are  actually 
bleeding  !' 

"  '  Oh,  it  is  nothing  of  any  consequence.'  (Tom  had  got 
the  hurt  in  his  previous  rencontre  at  the  street  door.) 

"  *  It  is  of  consequence — we  must  get  it  looked  to  at  once. 
Here,  Mrs.  Nipper — deuce  take  the  woman,  where  is  she  ? 
Mrs.  Nipper,  I  say,  some  hot  water  and  towels — be  quick. 
If  ever  I  find  him  on  my  premises  again,  I'll  have  him 
skinned  alive.  The  second  knocker  in  a  week.  Ugh  !  the 
villain  !  Now,  pray*  my  dear  sir,  do  let  me  look  at  your 
wound.' 

"  Tom  having  submitted  his  head  to  the  inspection  of  Mr. 
Griffiths,  endeavored  to  assume  as  solemn  an  expression  of 
countenance  as  he  could.  Mrs.  Nipper  entering  with  a  basin 
of  hot  water,  no  sooner  saw  him,  than  she  began  to  scream 
violently. 

"  '  Deuce  take  the  woman,  what  is  she  at  ?  Did  you 
never  see  blood  before  ?  Run  up-stairs  and  bring  me  some 
sticking-plaster.  Be  quick,  if  you  please,  Mrs.  Nipper,7 
said  the  energetic  old  gentleman. 

"  The  cook  departed,  but  soon  returned  to  say  that  she 
could  not  find  the  article  of  which  she  had  gone  in  quest. 

"  '  Stupid  Nipper,  you  seem  to  have  lost  any  little  sense 
12* 


214  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA  ;    OR, 

you  ever  had  ;  give  me  the  candle  and  I'll  fetch  it  myself/ 
and  off  went  Mr.  Griffiths,  to  look  for  the  plaster,  leaving 
his  domestic  face  to  face  with  the  object  which  had  inspired 
her  with  such  aversion  and  horror. 

" '  Now,  don't  look  so  frightened,  my  dear  friend/  said 
Tom  Feather  Yane,  '  here's  something  to  buy  you  a  new 
ribbon  ;'  and  as  he  "spoke  he  slipped  a  sovereign  into  the 
lady's  hand. 

"  l  Lawk,  my  good  gracious  !' 

"  '  Never  mind  your  good  gracious — I  have  let  your  lover 
off,  as  you  see — say  nothing  about  it,  and  I'll  make  your  for- 
tune, you  gipsy.' 

"How  this  feat  was  to  be  accomplished,  Tom  Feather 
Yane,  who  was  always  very  ready,  at  any  sudden  emergen- 
cy, with  vague  promises,  never  paused  to  determine.  He 
laid  his  finger  on  his  lips — '  Mum  !  is  the  word,  Mrs.  Nip- 
per,' he  said  ;  '  you  may  trust  me,  my  dear.' 

"  The  approach  of  the  master  of  the  house  rendered  any 
further  conversation  impossible,  so  Mrs.  Nipper  slipped  the 
coin  into  her  bosom,  and  assisted  her  master  in  the  surgical 
operations  which  he  proceeded  to  perform  upon  his  interest- 
ing patient. 

"  When  Tom  Feather  Yane  was  washed  and  brushed, 
covered  with  sticking-plaster,  and  made  as  presentable  as 
under  existing  circumstances  it  was  possible  to  make  him,  he 
was  invited  to  remain  to  supper  as  a  matter  of  course,  and 
like  a  clever  fellow  as  he  was,  he  made  so  good  a  use  of 
this  opportunity,  that  a  very  few  weeks  seemed  to  establish 
him  as  a  regular  visitor  of  the  family  ;  and  it  is  somewhat 
remarkable,  that  from  the  period  of  that  occurrence,  there 
never  was  another  knocker  stolen  from  the  hall-door  of  the 
Griffiths'  mansion  ;  a  circumstance  which  Tom,  with  inimita- 
ble sang  froid  and  nonchalance,  attributed  to  the  personal 
prowess  of  Mr.  Griffiths,  in  his  rencontre  with  the  felonious 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  275 

assailant  of  his  premises.  Such  was  the  manner  in  which 
tjje  lieutenant  obtained  an  introduction  ;  and  it  was  at  the 
petit  souper  which  succeeded  to  the  affray,  that  his  eye  was 
most  agreeably  refreshed  by  the  sight  of  a  very  charming 
young  lady,  who,  what  with  tittering  and  blushing  at  the 
comical  picture  he  presented  with  the  right  side  of  his  head 
covered  with  large  stripes  of  sticking-plaster,  and  trembling 
for  the  safety  of  her  beloved  parent,  formed  one  of  the  most 
enchanting  pictures  of  youthful  grace  and  loveliness  he 
thought  he  had  ever  had  the  good  fortune  to  behold.  He 
envied  the  old  gentleman  as  his  daughter  threw  her  arm 
round  his  pudgy  neck  with  a  loving  pressure,  and  felt 
inclined  to  defy  him  to  mortal  combat  on  the  spot ;  but  as 
such  a  rencontre  might  have  interfered  with  his  future  opera- 
tions, Tom  restrained  his  angry  feelings  at  seeing  a  father 
kissed  by  his  daughter,  and  made  himself  so  uncommonly 
agreeable,  that  he  produced  a  favorable  impression  upon 
both  ;  so  that  in  an  unusually  short  time  from  this  incident, 
he  had  contrived  to  become  the  accepted  suitor  of  the  young 
lady,  whom  he  afterwards  led  to  the  hymeneal  altar." 

"  Bravo  !  capital  !"  resounded  from  all  sides,  when  the 
speaker  had  concluded. 

"  And  now,  my  boys,  do  you  think  we  shall  really  catch 
these  fellows  after  all  ?" 

"  Impossible  to  tell,  until  daylight  doth  appear." 
"  It's  beginning  to  appear  now,  or  I  am  mistaken." 
"  Douse  the  glim  then,  and  let  us  have  a  look  out." 
The  lamp  being  accordingly  extinguished,  the  gray  light 
of  dawning  morning  streamed  in  upon  the  assembled  party, 
who  did  not  by  any  means  appear  to  so  much  advantage 
seen  through  its  medium,  as  they  did  by  lamp-light.     But 
they  donned  their  various  habiliments,  and  proceeded  upon 
deck — tumbling  up,  as  the  phrase  is,  one  after  another,  the 
companion  ladder.     The  night  watch  was  still  on  the  look- 


216  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

out,  the  men  for  the  most  part  were  asleep  at  their  quarters. 
Neither  the  captain  nor  the  first  lieutenant  had  of  course 
made  their  appearance,  and  the  good  ship  was  holding  on 
under  a  heavy  press  of  sail,  the  apparently  solitary  occupant 
of  the  vast  expanse  of  sea. 

"  Blow  !  blow,  thou  freshening  breeze  I"  shouted  Walter 
Long  ;  "  blow  us  to  the  enemy  I" 

"  There  don't  seem  much  probability  of  such  a  result,  as 
far  as  I  am  able  to  judge,"  said  Hamilton,  who  was  sweep- 
ing the  horizon  with  a  glass.  "  No,  none  can  tell  what  luck 
may  be  in  store  for  us  before  the  sun  goes  down." 

"Whereabouts  were  they  seen  last?7' 

"  To  the  south-west,"  replied  the  captain  of  the  watch. 

"  They  have  out-sailed  us,  then,  and  be  d — d  to  them !" 

"  Shouldn't  think  that  at  all  likely ;  the  fog  is  still  heavy 
to  leeward." 

"And  when  it  clears  off,  you  think  they'll  turn  up,  eh  ?" 

"  I  have  no  doubt  of  it,  whatever,"  replied  the  man, 
touching  his  hat. 

"  How  many  of  them  were  reported  due  ?" 

"Only  one  sail,  to  any  certainty." 

"  Well,  one  is  enough,  if  we  can  only  catch  her." 

"And  so  we  shall  with  the  blessing  of  Providence,"  said 
the  captain  of  the  watch. 

But  the  daylight  which  they  had  all  been  so  anxiously 
awaiting,  although  it  had  now  fairly  broken,  and  the  rising 
sun  had  dispelled  the  floating  mist,  did  not  reveal  to  the 
anxious  crew  the  enemy  of  whom  they  were  in  quest.  But 
instead  thereof,  lay  a  long  stripe,  like  a  thin  bank  of  cloud, 
floating  on  the  surface  of  the  water,  far  away  in  the  dis- 
tance, which  was  soon  ascertained  to  be  land,  even  before 
the  man  at  the  mast-head  made  the  usual  announcement. 
The  disappointment  was  deep  and  universal.  There  could 
be  no  question  that  the  strange  sail  had  succeeded,  under 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  27t 

cover  of  the  night,  in  rejoining  the  remainder  of  the  squad- 
ron in  the  harbor  of  Brest.  Deep  and  loud  were  the  rail- 
ings against  the  ill-fortune  which  had  befallen  the  Juno  in 
allowing  such  a  prize  to  escape  ;  but  there  was  apparently 
no  help  for  it,  so  all  hands  were  piped  to  breakfast  in  an 
exceedingly  ill-humor,  and  the  Juno  held  on  upon  her 
course,  the  land  of  the  French  coast  becoming  every  hour 
more  distinctly  visible.  At  length,  towards  evening,  as  the 
ship  passed  close  to  the  shore,  a  fine  frigate  was  discovered 
at  anchor  under  the  batteries  of  Carnantburg.  She  rode 
at  her  anchors,  with  top-gallants  across,  her  large  ensign 
floating  from  the  peak ;  she  was  evidently  the  object  the 
Juno  had  been  so  long  pursuing,  and  there  she  was,  to  all 
appearance  secure  from  any  hostile  aggression.  The  cir- 
cumstance having  been  duly  reported  to  the  skipper,  who 
was  not  the  man  to  be  deterred  from  any  course  which 
seemed  to  hold  out  a  reasonable  prospect  of  success,  he 
swore  he  would  cut  her  out.  The  news  soon  flew  fore  and 
aft.  The  men  swarming  at  the  quarters  were  not  in  a  hu- 
mor to  be  balked.  Then  came  all  the  preparations  for  this 
desperate  undertaking,  for  it  was  well  known  that  the  posi- 
tion of  the  frigate  was  such,  that  any  attempt  to  cut  her 
out  would  be  attended  with  a  tremendous  sacrifice  of  life. 

"Well,  my  boy,  which  boat  do  you  go  in?"  inquired 
Walter  Long  of  a  messmate,  who  was  selecting  from  a  bun- 
dle of  cutlasses  one  which  seemed  the  best  adapted  to  his 
length  and  strength  of  arm. 

"  I  go  in  the  cutter  with  Morris  ;  we  lead." 
"  Tfie  deuce  you  do  I  you  may,  too,  if  you  can  keep  it." 
"  We'll  do  our  best,  my  boy  ;  who  are  you  with?" 
"  Oh,  I'm  in  the  gig.     Brown  is  with  us." 
"  I  think  Brown  looks  a  little  chalky  about  the  gills ; 
hey,  don't  he,  rather  ?     He  is  thinking  of  his  little  wife  and 
four  small  children  at  Gosport,  most  probably." 


218  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  Ah  !  I  didn't  know  he  had  any  responsibilities  of  that 
kind" 

"Yes,  he  has ;  and  serious  ones  they  are  when  a  fellow 
is  going  into  such  an  action." 

"  Of  course  I  of  course — I  think  this  blade  seems  the 
stoutest :  its  temper  shall  be  tried  presently." 

Towards  nightfall  everything  was  in  readiness,  and  at  a 
given  signal,  the  boats,  duly  manned,  in  perfect  silence  left 
the  ship.  Such  was  the  ardor  of  the  men,  that  they  strove, 
one  division  against  the  other,  to  near  the  frigate.  In  this 
effort  to  be  first,  there  was  displayed  less  discretion  than 
enthusiasm — one  would  have  thought  they  were  rowing  at 
a  boat-race.  And  at  length,  the  splashing  of  the  oars  in 
all  probability  had  attracted  the  notice  of  the  frigate  ;  for 
a  blue-light  was  thrown  up,  and  weighing  anchor,  she  ran 
in  close  alongside  of  the  batteries,  where  she  moored.  But 
the  more  the  danger,  the  more  sailors  feel  stimulated.  The 
removal  of  the  frigate  did  not  cause  the  expedition  for  a 
moment  to  falter ;  their  hands  and  hearts  were  alike  ready. 
There  was  not  a  sound  heard  save  the  measured  dip  of  the 
muffled  oars  as  they  fell  swiftly  in  the  water. 

The  boats  were  now  close  together,  and  rapidly  approach- 
ing the  object  of  attack.  The  first  halted  for  a  moment, 
and  the  first  lieutenant  standing  up,  addressed  his  crew. 

"  Now,  my  lads,"  he  said,  "  we  have  a  stiff  piece  of  work 
before  us ;  but  the  greater  the  danger,  the  greater  the 
honor.  To  bring  that  frigate  out  from  the  teeth  of  them 
batteries  will  be  no  easy  piece  of  work,  I  promise  you. 
You,  Bill  Sykes,  are  a  smart  foretop  man ;  let  us  see  how 
you  can  loosen  the  frigate's  foretop  sail,  so  as  to  catch  any 
breath  of  wind,  and  we  shall  have  a  stiff  one  presently. 
You  need  not  be  particular  in  casting  off  the  gasket ;  a 
sharp  knife  and  an  easy  conscience  will  do  the  work.  Don't 
stand  on  stepping-stones,  and  in  the  meantime  we'll  see  what 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  219 

we  can  do  with  the  fellows  below.  So  now,  my  lads,  one 
single  cheer,  and  then  you'll  follow  me." 

A  hearty  cheer,  that  seemed  to  ring  from  the  very  bosom 
of  the  deep,  was  the  immediate  reply,  and  the  boats  dashed 
on  to  the  attack,  the  cutter  leading  the  way. 

But  just  at  this  moment  a  sheet  of  flame  burst  from  the 
frigate,  followed  by  a  crashing  volley  of  grape  and  canister, 
which  taking  effect  upon  the  second  boat,  stove  it  into 
atoms.  This  salutation,  enough  to  have  damped  the  cour- 
age of  any  men,  however  determined,  was  received  with  a 
fresh  cheer,  and  casting  on  their  grappling  irons,  the  assail- 
ants prepared  to  board.  But  this  was  no  easy  task.  The 
French,  armed  at  all  points,  presented  a  bristling  front  of 
boarding  pikes  and  cutlasses,  while  a  close  and  well-directed 
fire  of  musketry  was  kept  up  from  the  poop. 

Nothing  could  exceed  the  gallantry  of  the  assailants,  but 
they  were  driven  back  with  great  loss,  in  spite  of  their 
clinging  cat-like  to  the  ropes  ;  while  the  enemy,  seeing  the 
failure  of  the  first  attempt  to  gain  a  footing,  shouted  like 
demons  with  rage  and  triumph.  Never  since  man  first  en- 
gaged his  fellow  was  there  displayed  on  both  sides  more 
desperate  courage.  The  fire-arms  of  the  British  sailors 
were  now  perfectly  useless,  and,  armed  with  the  cutlass  and 
boarding-pike  only,  they  persevered  in  their  attempt  with 
undaunted  determination.  The  batteries  had  now  opened, 
and  although  the  darkness  of  the  night  prevented  them 
from  aiming  with  any  certainty,  the  shot  fell  like  hail  in  the 
water.  Undismayed  by  the  furious  fire  from  them  and  from 
the  frigate,  undeterred  by  the  forest  of  pikes  which  bristled 
from  her  bows,  and  the  loss  of  so  many  a  gallant  comrade, 
the  English  sailors  again  and  again  rushed  to  the  assault, 
and  at  length  succeeded  in  gaining  a  footing  upon  the  fore- 
castle. 

"  Hurrah  for  the  first  aloft I;;  shouted  Sykes,  who,  clear- 


280  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

ing  a  path  with  his  cutlass,  sprang  upon  the  rigging,  and 
clambering  aloft,  was  soon  in  the  neighborhood  of  the  fore- 
top-sail  yard.  But  having  made  good  his  way,  the  gallant 
seaman  found  an  unexpected  obstacle  :  the  gear  was  lashed 
close  along  the  yard,  but  a  clasp-knife,  judiciously  applied, 
soon  set  it  free  ;  and  so  expeditiously  was  this  accomplished, 
and  so  well  did  the  seamen  stationed  to  loose  the  sail  per- 
form their  part  of  the  work,  that  in  less  than  five  minutes 
after  the  period  of  gaining  the  deck,  the  frigate  had  her 
three  topsails  and  courses  cut  adrift,  and  the  sails  dropping 
down  ready  to  be  sheeted  home.  The  sound  of  the  falling 
sails  was  the  first  intimation  of  his  danger  to  the  enemy. 
So  long  as  they  continued  under  the  batteries,  they  had  lit- 
tle ground  for  apprehension  ;  but  once  drifting  out  to  sea, 
with  a  desperate  enemy  on  board,  they  felt  their  position 
would  be  hopeless.  Everything  now  depended  upon  the 
wind. 

Meanwhile  the  struggle  upon  deck  proceeded.  It  was 
literally  hand  to  hand  and  foot  to  foot ;  the  cutlass  and  the 
boarding-pike  against  the  sabre  and  the  bayonet.  At  first 
the  French  stood  their  ground  with  admirable  determina- 
tion, and  the  assailants  were  repulsed  with  serious  loss  ;  but 
the  vigor  of  their  attack  at  last  carried  everything  before 
it ;  and  although  the  deck,  contested  inch  by  inch  as  it  was, 
continued  swept  by  a  heavy  fire  of  musketry,  it  was  soon  in 
the  possession  of  the  British  seamen.  At  this  crisis  a  voice 
was  heard  to  exclaim,  "  She  goes  ahead  now !"  The  mo- 
tion of  the  ship  was  perceptible  to  all  on  board  ;  and  then, 
high  over  the  crashing  of  the  shot,  and  the  shrieks  of  the 
wounded,  rose  in  tones  of  thunder  the  British  cheer.  But 
the  firing  from  the  ramparts  still  continued  with  unabated 
vigor,  and  it  was  quite  evident  that  the  soldiery,  seeing  the 
vessel  had  been  taken,  were  determined  if  possible  to  de- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  281 

stroy  her,  even  at  the  sacrifice  of  all  on  board.  The  wind, 
however,  increased — a  few  minutes  more,  and  the  vessel, 
with  her  crew  and  her  gallant  captors,  would  be  beyond  the 
reach  of  further  injury.  The  crisis  was  one  of  intense  ex- 
citement. On  the  forecastle  stood  Walter  Long  ;  how  he 
had  contrived  to  escape  destruction  seemed  miraculous,  for 
he  was  in  the  first  boat,  which  had  been  stove  to  pieces. 
He  had  fought  his  way  to  the  post  of  eminence  which  he 
now  occupied,  surrounded  by  a  few  of  his  comrades.  The 
acquisition  of  this  position  had  been"  an  achievement  by  no 
means  easy  of  performance.  As  he  led  the  way  from  the 
quarter-gallery,  he  found  his  progress  impeded,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  door  having  been  barricaded.  All  attempts 
to  demolish  this  obstacle  having  proved  in  vain,  he  clam- 
bered up  to  the  taffrail,  and  from  thence  succeeded  in  gam- 
ing the  quarter-deck,  where  the  fight  was  thickest.  Sweep- 
ing his  cutlass  round  his  head,  and  cheering  on  his  comrades, 
he  had  fought  his  way  gallantly  to  the  spot.  And  now  the 
breeze  springing  up,  the  sails  were  trimmed,  and  the  frigate 
drawing  fast  from  the  land,  was  soon  out  of  the  reach  of 
any  further  mischief. 

The  exultation  at  the  success  of  this  gallant  enterprise 
would  be  less  difficult  to  imagine  than  to  describe.  The 
captured  frigate  was  towed  alongside,  and  taken  into  the 
nearest  English  port.  The  brilliant  exploit  we  have  thus 
recorded,  found  praise  from  every  lip ;  it  was  one  of  the 
most  daring  and  well-executed  naval  attacks  since  the  cut- 
ting out  of  the  Herrnione.  The  loss  was,  however,  consid- 
erable ;  fifteen  men  had  been  killed  on  the  part  of  the  as- 
sailants, and  nearly  thirty  severely  wounded.  For  some  days 
after  the  engagement,  the  crew  of  the  Juno  were  busily  en- 
gaged in  endeavoring  to  repair  the  damages  which  had 
been  sustained  from  the  shot  of  the  batteries  by  the  French 


282  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA,  ETC. 

vessel ;  new  sails  had  to  be  bent ;  the  gunwales,  which  were 
considerably  torn  by  shot,  to  be  replaced  ;  and  many  other 
repairs  effected,  before  the  vessel  could  with  safety  be  pro- 
nounced fit  for  sea.  Fitted  for  sea,  however,  in  due  time, 
she  became  ;  and  now,  under  another  name,  manned  by  an- 
other crew,  and  with  a  different  -  ensign  floating  from  her 
poop,  she  ploughs  the  waves,  a  very  neat  and  unexception- 
able English  cruiser. 


AQUATIC    EXPEDITION 


GIBRALTAR   TO   BARCELONA. 


SOME  years  since; — no  matter  how  many,  but  it  was  in 
the  month  of  May — I  found  myself  (located,  as  the  Yan- 
kees say)  for  four-and-twenty  hours  at  the  Ragged  Staff 
Guard  at  Gibraltar,  and,  during  my  tour  of  duty,  was  visited 

by  my  friend  B ,  who  mentioned  his  having  obtained 

twelve  months'  leave  of  absence,  and  his  intention  of  pro- 
ceeding in  his  yacht  to  Carthagena,  and  thence  through 
France  to  England,  provided  any  officer  would  accompany 
him  to  whom  might  be  intrusted  the  charge  of  the  craft  on 
her  homeward  voyage.  Yachting  and  boating  are  favorite 
pastimes  with  the  military  denizens  of  the  Rock,  and  they 
who  possess  a  taste  for  aquatic  pursuits,  have  ample  induce- 
ment to  gratify  their  predilection,  for  the  scene  on  a  calm 
summer's  evening,  when  the  noble  bay  reflects  on  its  un- 
ruffled surface  the  numerous  vessels  resting  on  its  bosom, 
and  the  lofty  Rock,  with  its  batteries,  houses,  orange  trees, 
geraniums  and  acacias,  with  the  distant  mountains  of  Spain 
and  Africa,  are  bathed  in  the  light  of  a  brilliant  sunset,  is 
sufficient  to  win  to  exertion  even  the  most  indolent  and  apa- 
thetic. When,  on  the  other  hand,  strong  south-westerly 


284  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

breezes  or  the  more  dangerous  "Levanter"  prevail,  giga 
manned  by  adventurous  spirits  may  be  seen  poised  on  the 
crests  or  descending  into  the  trough  of  the  accompanying 
heavy  sea,  whilst  here  and  there  trim  little  yachts,  stagger- 
ing under  a  press  of  canvas,  the  flag  of  England  fluttering 
from  their  peaks,  proclaim  their  owners  sons  of  that  nation 
whose 

"  March  is  on  the  mountain  wave,  whose  home  is  on  the  deep." 

Of  that  gallant  and  warm-hearted  band  who  were  then  the 
chief  promoters  of  boating  parties,  of  pic-nics;  and  of  fun 
and  merriment  of  every  kind,  but  few  now  remain.  Some, 
chafing  at  a  life  of  inactivity  in  our  own  service,  joined  the 
ranks  of  the  British  Legion,  and  at  St.  Sebastian  "  foremost 
fighting  fell."  Some  have  withered  under  the  blasting  in- 
fluence of  West  Indian  yellow  fever ;  the  bones  of  others 
are  bleaching  on  the  banks  of  the  distant  Sutlej  ;  a  few 
have  achieved  honors  and  renown ;  some  still  serve  on, 
hoping  for  opportunities  of  distinguishing  themselves  which 
may  never  arrive  ;  and  others,  passing  into  private  life,  have 
been*  absorbed  and  lost  sight  of  in  the  great  vortex  of  ever- 
changing  society. 

It  may  at  the  first  moment  seem  strange  that  B 

should  have  expressed  doubts  as  to  any  one  joining  him  on 
the  cruise  he  proposed,  but  a  future  description  of  the  little 
"  Midge"  will  somewhat  account  for  his  skepticism.  Think- 
ing this  would  be  an  excellent  opportunity  for  seeing  more 
of  Spain  than  I  had  hitherto  been  enabled  to  accomplish,  I 
immediately  expressed  my  readiness  for  the  trip — and  there 
being,  moreover,  just  sufficient  risk  in  the  business  to  render 
it  what  is  termed  a  "  sporting  undertaking"  served  as  an 

additional  incentive  to  make  the  trial ;  and  on  Lieut.  II 

also  agreeing  to  join  the  party,  nothing  remained  but  to 
apply  for  leave  (which  was  granted)  and  to  make  the  ne- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  285 

cessary  preparations  for  the  voyage.  As  none  of  us  had 
ever  been  eastward  of  Malaga,  and  were  totally  ignorant 

of  the  coast,  Admiral,  then  Captain  S ,  was  consulted 

as  to  the  prudence  of  the  undertaking,  who  thereupon  in- 
formed us  "  we  should  all  be  drowned."  This  opinion  (in 
conformity  with  the  perverseness  of  human  nature)  only 
strengthened  our  determination  to  proceed  ;  but  hearing 

that  the  governor,  the  late  Sir  W.  H ,  had  declared  he 

would  not  permit  us  to  start  upon  so  wild  an  expedition,  we 
procured  bills  of  health  for  Cadiz  as  well  as  for  Carthagena, 
and  thus  in,  some  degree  blinded  the  authorities  as  to  our 
real  intentions.  On  the  afternoon  of  Sunday,  the  second 
of  June,  the  anchor  was  weighed,  and  by  the  united  assist- 
ance of  the  current  and  a  strong  south-westerly  breeze,  the 
Rock  was  soon  left  far  astern.  The  singular  fact  that  while 
at  its  upper  extremity  the  Mediterranean  receives  a  con- 
stant supply  from  the  Black  Sea  by  a  current  setting  into  it 
from  the  Dardanelles,  and  at  the  lower  by  a  current  setting 
through  the  straits  of  Gibraltar  from  the  Atlantic,  no  per- 
ceptible influence  is  exercised  upon  it  by  this  necessarily 
vast  accession  of  water,  has  been  the  subject  of  much  con- 
sideration amongst  the  learned,  and  various  theories  have 
been  propounded  to  account  for  this  remarkable  circum- 
stance. That  the  upper  influx  is  counteracted  by  an  under 
efflux  can  scarcely  be  doubted,  for  that  the  superfluous 
water  could  be  carried  off  by  evaporation  alone  bears  upon 
it  the  stamp  of  impossibility.  Behold  us  now  fairly  afloat, 
and  a  description  of  the  boat,  destined  for  several  weeks  to 
be  our  home,  which  gallantly  weathered  many  a  gale  and 
bore  us  over  some  hundreds  of  miles,  may  not  here  be  out 
of  place.  Of  about  five  tons  burthen,  and  cutter-rigged 
with  a  mizen,  her  capabilities  of  steerage  were  for  her  size 
considerable.  Aft  was  an  open  space  in  the  deck  for  the 
helmsman,  which  could  be  closed  at  pleasure.  Round  this 


286  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;  OB, 

(in  lockers  for  the  purpose)  were  wines  and  provisions. 
The  cabin  contained  two  sleeping  berths  for  ourselves,  and 
opening  from  it  was  accommodation  for  the  crew.  Ledges 
of  about  five  inches  in  height  ran  fore  and  aft  of  the  berths, 
to  keep  the  mattresses  in  their  places,  and  a  plank  resting 
upon  them,  served  as  a  bench  when  taking  our  meals,  our 
heads  when  thus  seated  being  within  a  few  inches  of  the 
deck.  In  calm  weather  the  frames  of  the  hatches  were 
raised  upon  iron  stanchions,  which  added  much  to  our 
comfort.  A  small  table  slung  with  cords  from  the  deck 
could  be  unshipped  at  pleasure ;  drawers  for  knives,  forks, 
and  plates,  a  copper  washing  basin,  a  kettle,  a  coffee  pot,  a 
couple  of  saucepans,  a  frying-pan,  and  two  "  braseros" 
formed  our  list  of  indispensables.  The  commissariat  con- 
sisted of  seven  days'  water,  salt  provisions,  a  portion  of  the 
common  red  wine  of  the  country,  biscuits,  tea,  sugar,  coffee, 
cheese,  &c.  The  stores  were  three  anchors,  one  chain, 
and  two  hempen  cables,  iron  ballast,  spare  sails,  &c.  Two 
small  guns  forward,  and  two  aft,  for  signals,  working  upon 
pivots,  were,  when  at  sea,  usually  placed  below.  This  cargo, 
added  to  our  three  selves  and  the  crew,  (two  men  and  a 
boy,  the  latter  working  his  way  to  Santa  Pola,)  brought 
the  yacht  so  low  in  the  water  that  by  leaning  over  the  side 
we  could  reach  it  with  our  hands.  The^party  was  divided 
into  three  watches,  one  of  ourselves  being  always  in  charge, 
and  such  other  arrangements  were  made  as  were  considered 
most  conducive  to  our  safety  and  comfort. 

The  fresh  breeze  with  which  we  had  commenced  our  voyage 
gradually  deserted  us,  and  we  had  the  extreme  felidty  (?) 
of  tumbling  about  in  a  heavy  short  sea  during  the  greater 
part  of  the  night ;  but  the  following  morning  the  friendly 
south-wester  again  came  to  our  aid,  and  after  speaking  H.  M. 
ten-gun  brig  Philomel,  (with  the  officers  of  which  we  were 
well  acquainted,  owing  to  her  being  on  the  Gibraltar  sta- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING  287 

tion,)  cruising  under  easy  canvas,  anchored  in  Malaga  Bay 
about  half-past  twelve  o'  clock.  The  health-boat  coming 
alongside  and  the  officer  in  charge  admitting  us  to  pratique, 
a  shore-boat  was  put  in  requisition  to  land  us,  the  "  Midge" 
not  being  sufficiently  large  to  carry  even  a  "  dingy"  for  our 
own  use. 

We  first  paid  our  respects  to  Mr.  Mark,  the  consul,  and 
then  proceeded  to  the  authorities,  whose  duty  it  was  to 
examine  and  sign  the  cutter's  papers.  The  town  of  Malaga, 
situated  in  the  province  of  Granada,  and  divided  by  the  river 
Guadelmedina  into  two  parts,  presents,  with  the  ruins  of  its 
ancient  Moorish  castle,  a  fine  appearance  from  the  sea  ; 
the  mountains  which  surround  it  forming  a  splendid  back- 
ground to  the  picture.  The  Cathedral  was  the  first  point 
of  attention ;  one  of  its  towers  only  was  completed,  but 
from  the  other  is  a  magnificent  view  of  the  adjacent  country. 
The  roof,  supported  by  lofty  pillars,  has  but  little  beauty  to 
recommend  it,  but  the  choir  is  curiously  carved  and  con- 
tains a  number  of  stalls.  Of  the  tone  of  the  organs,  two  in 
number,  we  had  no  opportunity  of  judging.  Great  efibrts 
were  made  to  impress  us  with  a  sense  of  the  unrivalled  mag- 
nificence of  the  building,  but  our  expectations  in  this  par- 
ticular were  grievously  disappointed.  The  Alameda  is  a 
beautiful  promenade,  planted  with  trees  and  surrounded 
with  handsome  houses.  It  is  the  favorite  resort  of  the  fair 
sex,  and  the  Malagenas,  equalling  if  not  excelling  their  sis- 
ters of  Cadiz  in  those  attractions  which  captivate  the  sterner 
sex,  here  make  sad  havoc  with  the  hearts  of  their  attendant 
caballeros.  Several  parties  of  them  were  slowly  pacing  up 
and  down,  and  certes  the  magnificent  eyes  and  voluptuous 
forms  of  some  among  them  were  amply  sufficient  to  have 
roused  the  passions  of  far  colder  blooded  mortals  than  are 
the  inhabitants  of  this  fiery  clime.  The  streets  were  narrow 
and  crowded  with  people,  some  sitting,  some  standing,  some 


288  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

stretched  at  full  length  on  the  ground,  some  slowly  saunter- 
ing, but  all  apparently  revelling  in  idleness,  and  affording 
by  their  picturesque  costumes  and  lazy  attitudes  interesting 
studies  to  the  observant  artist. 

"  Torijos ';  and  his  companions,  some  fifty  in  number,  and 
amongst  them  an  Irish  gentleman  named  Boyd,  were  shot 
on  the  beach  in  December,  1831,  by  General  Moreno,  for 
having  endeavored  to  procure  a  rising  in  favor  of  the  "  Con- 
stitution," their  capture  being  effected  by  a  system  of  treach- 
ery seldom  heard  of  amongst  civilized  nations.  It  is  a  mat- 
ter of  surprise,  that,  about  to  embark  on  a  perilous  service, 
and  as  Spaniards  well  acquainted  with  the  proverbial  deceit- 
fulness  of  their  fellow-countrymen,  they  so  easily  fell  into 
the  trap  prepared  for  them — "  Quos  Deus  vult  perdere  prius 
dementat."  With  Mr.  Boyd  some  of  us  had  been  slightly 
acquainted,  and  this  circumstance  added  to  the  interest  we 
took  in  the  scene  of  the  catastrophe.  Having  been  deluded 
by  false  representations  on  the  part  of  the  government  au- 
thorities that  the  soldiery  at  Malaga  were  disaffected,  and 
that  two  guarda  costas  would  join  and  escort  the  party  on 
their  voyage,  Torijos  and  his  companions  were,  in  an  evil 
hour,  induced  to  start  on  their  ill-starred  expedition.  The 
government  cruisers,  instead  of  proving  friendly,  drove  them 
on  shore  at  a  point  where  troops  were  prepared  for  their 
hostile  reception  ;  when  taking  refuge  in  a  house,  they  were 
compelled  to  surrender,  and  soon  after  shot  without  trial. 
A  letter  was  sent,  by  Mr.  Boyd,  to  a  friend  at  Gibraltar, 
composed  a  few  hours  before  his  execution,  expressing  calm 
and  manly  resignation  to  his  fate,  stating  that  a  priest  had 
endeavored  to  make  him  abjure  his  religion,  and  requesting 
the  person  to  whom  the  communication  was  addressed,  to 
declare  publicly,  in  case  doubts  should  be  expressed  on  the 
subject,  that  he  died  a  firm  adherent  to  the  Protestant  faith. 

Embarking  in  the  evening,  we  sailed  with  the  rising  of 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  289 

the  land  wind,  the  night  being  very  dark,  save  when  vivid 
lightning  shed  its  momentary  blaze  over  the  far  horizon. 
During  the  middle  watch  the  storm  was  in  all  its  grandeur, 
and  the  scene  was  awfully  impressive.  The  electric  fluid 
leaped  from  cloud  to  cloud,  the  thunder  crashed  above  our 
heads,  while  the  phosphoric  light  which  gleamed  from  the 
water,  as  with  a  steady  breeze  the  cutter  ploughed  her  way 
through  the  swelling  billows,  cast  a  ghastly  hue  upon  her 
canvas  during  the  intervals  of  pitchy  darkness.  This  tur- 
moil of  the  elements  gradually  ceased,  and  morning  at  length 
shed  its  cold  gray  light  upon  the  restless  waves.  There  is 
something  inexpressibly  cheerful  in  the  advent  of  approach- 
ing day ;  to  behold  it  dispelling  night,  and  lifting  itself,  as 
it  were,  from  out  the  ever  moving  waters.  Objects  hitherto 
indistinct  become  gradually  more  and  more  visible,  a  golden 
tinge  irradiates  the  sky,  and  clouds  of  brilliant  coloring  her- 
ald the  approach  of  the  great  luminary  who  diffuses  light 
and  life  o'er  all  created  nature.  During  the  early  part  of N 
the  day  we  anchored  abreast  of  a  small  village  called  Nerja, 
and  going  ashore,  paid  our  respects  to  the  Padre,  with  a 
view  of  obtaining  from  him  any  information  that  might 
prove  useful.  He  received  us  with  politeness,  and  sent  for 
some  fishermen  to  give  us  directions  as  to  our  future  navi- 
gation along  the  coast.  There  being  nothing  worthy  of  ob- 
servation at  Nerja,  and  finding  ourselves  objects  of  unpleas- 
ant curiosity  to  the  inhabitants,  who  appeared  imbued  with 
eastern  distrust  of  strangers,  we  returned  on  board  the 
yacht.  The  heat  was  intense ;  not  a  cloud  obscured  the 
midday  sun,  whose  rays  were  reflected  as  by  a  mirror  from 
the  surface  of  a  sea  unruffled  by  the  slightest  breeze.  A 
white  mist,  floating  over  the  summits  of  the  mountains, 
blended  earth  and  sky  in  indistinct  confusion.  The  "Midge " 
riding  lazily  at  her  anchor,  floating  quietly  upon  the  long 
undulations  of  a  heavy  ground  swell,  combined  with  the 


290  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

monotonous  roar  of  the  sarf  breaking  upon  the  adjacent 
rocks,  superinduced  a  most  overpowering  feeling  of  lassitude 
and  distaste  for  exertion.  The  hatches  being  removed,  and 
their  frames  elevated  upon  the  'stanchions,  (previously 
spoken  of,)  wet  sails  were  laid  over  all,  and  a  trifling  degree 
of  coolness  being  thus  obtained,  we  followed  the  example  of 
the  natives  and  resigned  ourselves  to  repose.  About  7  P. 
M.  we  were  again  under  weigh,  a  light  air  just  filling  the 
sails,  and  soon  had  a  fine  view  of  the  Apuljarras  mountains 
which  extend  many  miles  along  the  coast.  The  morning  of 
the  fifth  brought  with  it  an  increasing  breeze  from  the  old 
quarter,  the  south-west,  and  our  gallant  little  craft  dashed 
through  the  water  in  first  rate  style.  Numerous  vessels 
were  sighted  during-  the  day,  one  of  which  we  spoke,  and 
found  to  be  the  "  Rambler,"  from  Leghorn,  bound  to  Lon- 
don. Towards  night,  the  wind  freshening  almost  to  a  gale, 
with  a  heavy  sea,  the  topmast  was  struck,  the  mainsail 
double  reefed,  the  mizen  brailed,  jibs  were  shifted,  and  the 
hatches  battened  down,  all  hands  remaining  on  deck  whilst 
we  doubled  Cape  de  Gata,  a  gigantic  rock  some  twenty 
miles  in  circumference.  Whether  arising  from  any  peculiar 
formation  of  the  coast,  I  cannot  pretend  to  decide,  but  cer- 
tain it  is  that  at  this  particular  spot  storms  are  almost  inva- 
riably encountered,  and  the  native  sailors  have  a  great  dis- 
like to  its  unpleasant  neighborhood.  Dark  clouds  driving 
swiftly  across  the  sky  permitted  a  waning  moon  to  shed  its 
sickly  light  at  intervals  upon  the  waste- of  waters  ;  occa- 
sional flashes  of  lightning  increased  the  wildness  of  the  pros- 
pect, while  far  away  to  leeward  the  dreaded  Cape  loomed 
spectrally  in  the  misty  distance.  The  "  Midge,"  with  the 
wind  nearly  a-beam,  flew  merrily  over  the  heaving  waves, 
and  quite  satisfied  us  that  happen  what  might,  she,  at  all 
events,  would  do  her  duty. 

Continuing  our  course  till  we  judged  a  sufficient  offing 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  291 

had  been  obtained  to  fetch  Carthagena,  the  helm  was  put 
up,  and  the  wind  drawing  right  aft,  the  mainsail  was  furled, 
the  square-sail  hoisted  in  its  place,  and  we  had  every  pros- 
pect (if  the  breeze  remained  steady)  of  a  fine  run  to  our 
desired  haven.  Great  care  was  requisite  in  steering  the 
cutter,  so  as  to  avoid  mischief  from  the  huge  seas  that  came 
thundering  astern,  as  if  determined  to  overwhelm  her ;  but 
the  buoyant  little  craft  rose  gallantly  upon  them,  and  they 
passed  harmlessly  by,  hissing  and  roaring  under  the  bows  in 
impotent  malice.  The  regular  watch  was  now  set,  and  the 
remainder  of  us  sought  the  shelter  of  our  diminutive  cabin. 
On  looking  out  from  the  hatchway  on  the  morning  of  the 
6th  all  was  changed.  It  was  a  perfect  calm  ;  the  bright 
blue  heaven  uncheckered  by  a  single  cloud,  and  not  a 
breath  of  air  existed  to  fill  the  sails,  which  flapped  and  rat- 
tled as  we  gently  rolled  upon  the  heavy  swells  ;  a  light  air 
springing  up  about  midday  enabled  us,  assisted  by  our 
sweeps,  to  reach  the  "  Puerto  de  las  Aguilas,"  in  the  harbor 
of  which  we  anchored  for  the  night.  It  is  very  secure  for 
small  craft,  protected  by  a  hill  jutting  out  into  the  sea,  on 
the  summit  of  which  is  a  fort.  We  passed  the  night  on 
board,  and  four  o'clock  on  the  morning  of  the  7th  saw  us 
again  under  weigh,  with  a  more  moderate  south-westerly 
breeze. 

A  large  guarda  costa,  carrying  a  heavy  gun  amidships, 
and  full  of  men,  bore  down  upon  us  about  ten,  evidently  not 
understanding  who  or  what  we  were,  but  upon  our  hoisting 
the  English  flag,  and,  in  reply  to  a  question  from  her  cap- 
tain, stating  whence  we  were  come  and  whither  we  were  go- 
ing, she  went  about  and  left  us  to  pursue  our  voyage.  The 
harbor  of  Carthagena  is,  from  the  narrowness  of  its  en- 
trance, very  difficult  of  access  to  strangers,  and  it  was  with 
some  little  trouble,  owing  to  our  total  ignorance  of  the  coast, 
that  we  at  length  discovered  it,  when,  standing  in,  we  an 


292  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

chored  about  three  o'clock  in  the  afternoon.  Having  ar- 
rived at  a  place  of  such  importance,  it  was  determined  to 
make  as  smart  an  appearance  as  circumstances  would  per- 
mit. The  cutter's  sails  were  furled  with  unusual  care,  the 
yard  was  squared  with  the  utmost  exactness,  ropes  were 
neatly  coiled  down,  swivels  mounted,  and  ourselves  arrayed 
in  blue  undress  uniforms,  awaited  the  arrival  of  the  health- 
boat,  which,  pulling  twelve  oars,  and  large  enough  to  have 
taken  the  "Midge"  on  board,  soon  after  came  alongside 
and  demanded  our  papers,  the  officers  and  crew  using  sun- 
dry exclamations  of  surprise  at  the  smallness  of  the  yacht. 
Our  credentials  being  delivered,  we  fully  expected  per- 
mission to  land  at  once,  when,  to  our  amazement  and  indig- 
nation, the  officials  informed  us  we  must  perform  six  days' 
quarantine,  that  being  the  time  fixed  for  all  vessels  coming 
from  Gibraltar.  In  vain  we  remonstrated,  stating  we  were 
last  from  Malaga,  and  not  from  Gibraltar  as  was  declared, 
when  the  Governor's  Secretary,  who  happened  to  be  present, 
settled  the  matter  by  a  direct  falsehood,  viz :  that  it  mat- 
tered not  where  vessels  might  have  touched  at,  but  that  if 
they  were  from  the  Rock  at  all,  into  quarantine  they  must 
go.  As  civility  had  failed  in  mollifying  these  worthies,  we 
tried  what  eifect  a  little  bluster  would  produce,  and  vowed 
that  every  Spanish  vessel  should,  upon  reaching  Gibraltar, 
perform  the  same  number  of  days'  quarantine  they  might  in- 
flict upon  us,  stating  in  addition,  we  should  forthwith  lay  a 
complaint  before  our  ambassador  at  Madrid.  The  Dons, 
evidently  a  little  bothered,  pulled  away,  leaving  a  health 
guard  in  a  boat  a  short  distance  off  'to  prevent  any  commu- 
nication with  the  shore.  A  few  pecetas  rendered  the  man 
excessively  obliging,  and  he  procured  for  us  a  supply  of 
•j-ater,  fresh  provisions  and  vegetables,  and  undertook  to 
send  a  letter  from  us  to  the  Consul,  informing  him  of  our 
situation,  and  requesting  he  would  use  his  influence  to  ob- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  293 

tain  our  release,  as  we  were  satisfied  some  knavery  was  at 
the  bottom  of  the  transaction. 

The  whole  proceeding,  however,  was  most  vexatious,  and 
the  prospect  of  a  long  beat  to  windward  of  between  two 
and  three  hundred  miles  back  to  the  Rock  against  the  pre- 
vailing westerly  winds,  without  accomplishing  the  object  of 
our  voyage,  at  the  first  moment  entirely  destroyed  our  equa- 
nimity ;  but  after  hoisting  the  yellow  flag,  and  consigning 
Spaniards  in  general,  and  the  Carthagena  gentry  in  parti- 
cular, to  the  tender  mercies  of  a  certain  person  who  shall 
be  nameless,  we  lighted  the  pipe  of  resignation  and  pa- 
tiently submitted  to  our  fate.  Our  arrival  had  evidently 
excited  some  little  interest ;  first  one  boat,  then  another, 
then  two  and  three  together,  hovered  round  us,  their  occu- 
pants making  remarks  upon  the  size,  rig,  and  appearance 
of  the  yacht.  Some  declared  we  belonged  to  the  Navy, 
others  that  we  were  spies  ;  in  short  no  supposition,  however 
ridiculous,  was  too  extravagant  for  their  fertile  imagina- 
tions. 

The  magnificent  harbor  of  Carthagena,  in  which  a  navy 
might  ride  at  anchor,  is  situated  on  the  coast  of  Murcia, 
and,  land-locked  on  all  sides,  save  at  its  entrance  defended 
by  an  island,  is  secure  from  every  storm.  A  few  coasting 
vessels  only  were  in  port  at  the  time  of  our  visit,  and  trade 
appeared  almost  to  have  deserted  a  locality  once  famous  in 
history  for  its  commerce.  The  shades  of  a  lovely  evening 
at  length  stole  over  us,  the  hum  of  voices  in  the  town  had 
ceased,  and  we  retired  to  our  berths  speculating  as  to  the 
course  that  would  be  adopted  towards  us  by  the  great  men 
on  shore.  Advantage  was  taken  of  the  fineness  of  the  fol- 
lowing morning  to  bring  all  our  bedding,  wet  clothes,  &c., 
on  deck,  and  such  little  repairs  were  made  in  the  rigging, 
as  upon  examination  were  found  requisite. 

Whilst  at  breakfast,  being  hailed  vociferously  by  some 


294  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

person  in  a  boat  close  to  us,  we  showed  ourselves  above  the 
hatchway,  when  a  gentleman,  taking  off  his  hat  and  bow- 
ing politely,  informed  us  in  Spanish  he  was  the  English 
Yice-Consul — rather  an  Irishism — but  though  a  Spaniard, 
he  was  the  locum  tenens  of  the  Consul,  who  was  absent  from 
Carthagena.  He  had  received  our  note,  and  h#d  waited 
upon  the  governor,  who  promised  that  in  a  short  time  we 
should  receive  permission  to  land.  After  some  little  con- 
versation, and  leaving  his  address,  he  took  his  departure. 
The  success  of  our  diplomacy  of  the  previous  afternoon  put 
us  all  in  high  spirits,  and  in  about  an  hour  the  tub  of  a 
health  boat  with  its  numerous  rowers  was  seen  slowly  ap- 
proaching, two  "  heroes"  in  cocked  hats  being  seated  in  the 
stern  sheets.  On  coming  alongside,  one  of  them  proved  to 
be  our  friend  the  secretary,  who,  with  much  courtesy,  this 
time,  regretted  the  inconvenience  we  had  been  put  to,  de- 
clared the  detention  to  have  been  a  mistake,  that  we  might 
go  on  shore  whenever  we  liked,  and  that  we  should  have 
admission  to  the  arsenal,  dockyard,  &c.  Many  compli- 
ments having  passed  between  us,  the  tub  moved  off,  and 
we  were  at  liberty. 

A  very  short  time  elapsed  ere  we  were  once  more  on 
terra  firma,  and  making  our  way  through  wide  and  well- 
paved  streets  to  the  residence  of  the  vice-consul,  who  had 
procured  for  us  the  promised  order.  It  was  with  feelings 
of  regret  that  we  viewed  the  deserted  quays,  rope  walks, 
and  foundries,  and  saw  that  everything  was  going  to  decay. 
Here  it  was,  in  more  prosperous  times,  the  Spanish  fleets 
were  equipped — fleets  that,  in  alliance  with  those  of  France, 
contested  with  us  the  sovereignty  of  the  seas.  Then  all 
was  life  and  activity,  now  silence  and  solitude.  In  the 
year  1804,  we  were  told,  4000  workmen  had  been  employed 
in  the  various  departments  ;  the  names  of  forty  only  were 
at  this  time  on  the  superintendent's  books,  and  a  small 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  295 

schooner  and  a  gun-boat  were  the  only  government  vessels 
in  the  docks  !  The  fortifications  are  strong,  and  the  garri- 
son numbered  about  2000  men.  The  little  trade  remaining 
is  principally  in  "  barilla,''  an  impure  carbonate  of  soda, 
produced  by  burning  marine  plants,  and  "  almagra,"  a  red 
earth  used  for  polishing  mirrors.  There  is  likewise  a  manu- 
facture of  sail-cloth  and  of  ropes  and  cable,  made  of  "  es- 
parto," a  species  of  rush.  The  costume  of  the  peasantry 
whom  we  met  in  the  streets  differed  from  that  we  had  pre- 
viously seen.  A  handkerchief  tied  round  the  head  took  the 
place  of  the  sugarloaf-shaped  hat  The  jacket  of  velvet, 
round  the  waist  a  colored  sash,  white  linen  kilt  instead  of 
breeches,  bare  legs,  hempen  sandals,  and  a  gorgeous  plaid 
thrown  over  the  shoulder ;  the  tout  ensembk  putting  us  in 
mind  of  the  Highlanders  of  Scotland.  For  the  mantilla 
the  women  had  substituted  white  woollen  shawls,  and  wore 
blue  petticoats  with  yellow  bodices.  Learning  that  alle- 
giance was  to  be  sworn  to  the  young  Queen  of  Spain  at 
Barcelona  on  or  about  the  20th  of  the  month,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  abrogation  of  the  Salic  law,  and  that  the 
ceremonies  would  be  upon  a  grand  scale,  we  wrote  to  Gib- 
raltar for  a  fortnight's  extension  of  leave,  to  enable  us  to 
proceed  to  the  former  city,  stating,  at  the  same  time,  we 
should  proceed  to  Valencia,  and  that  if  on  our  arrival  there 
we  heard  nothing  to  the  contrary,  should  conclude  it  had 
been  granted,  and  continue  our  voyage.  Having  ascended 
some  hills  in  the  neighborhood  of  the  town  to  enjoy  the 
view,  we  afterwards  returned  to  the  yacht  to  dine,  taking 
with  us  the  vice-consul.  A  strong  breeze  blowing  into  the 
bay  rendered  the  "Midge"  rather  uneasy,  and  we  had  not 
long  sat  down  to  our  meal  when  the  unfortunate  "vice" 
was  completely  upset  by  "mal  de  mer"  and  as  some  time 
elapsed  before  a  boat  could  be  procured  to  set  him  ashore, 


296  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    ORy 

he  remained  the  intervening  period  in  a  state  of  pitiable 
discomfort. 

We  accepted  an  invitation  to  pass  the  evening  at  his 
house,  and  remained  on  board  till  the  hour  arrived  for  fulfill- 
ing the  engagement.  At  the  residence  of  the  vice-consul 
we  found  several  caballeros  and  senoritas  (and  very  pretty 
sefLoritas  too)  assembled  to  meet  us.  There  was  singing  to 
guitar  accompaniments,  and  no  lack  of  conversation,  our 
broken  Spanish  affording  vast  amusement  to  our  fair 
acquaintances,  who  whenever  we  got  into  difficulties  assisted 
us  out  of  them  with  marvellous  dexterity. 

In  the  course  of  the  evening  our  host  inquired  if  we  had 

ever  felt  the  shock  of  an  earthquake.  R replied  in  the 

affirmative,  but  B and  myself  never  having  been  so  for- 
tunate, it  was  proposed  we  should  touch  at  Torre-vieja,  a 
village  on  the  coast  between  Carthagena  and  Alicante, 
where  it  was  affirmed  "  tembloresde  tierra"  took  place  con. 
stantly  with  more  or  less  violence,  and  that,  as  the  mother 
of  the  vice-consul  resided  there,  he  should  proceed  thither 
by  land,  and  give  us  the  meeting. 

This  plan  being  agreed  to,  we  naturally  made  inquiries 
concerning  the  country  we  were  about  to  visit,  when  it  ap- 
peared that  in  the  year  1829  some  ten  or  a  dozen  villages, 
Torre-vieja  amongst  the  number,  had  been  destroyed  and 
many  of  their  inhabitants  swallowed  up  by  one  of  these  con- 
vulsions of  nature,  and  since  that  occurrence  "  tremblings 
of  the  earth"  had  continued  almost  without  intermission. 
Having  passed  a  very  pleasant  evening  we  took  our  depart- 
ure, the  "  house  being  placed  at  our  disposal,"  and  we  in 
return  for  the  civility  "  kissing  (metaphorically)  the  ladies' 
feet,"  it  not  being  etiquette  on  any  occasion  to  follow  the 
English  custom  of  shaking  hands.  It  was  with  some  little 
curiosity  we  looked  forward  to  that  which  it  was  said  we 
should  experience  on  the  morrow,  for  though  to  "sea  shak- 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND  YACHTING.  297 

ing"  we  were  tolerably  well  inured,  we  could  form  but 
little  idea  of  what  would  be  our  sensations  when  subjected 
to  that  of  the  earth.  Early  the  following  morning  we  got 
under  weigh,  meeting  sharp  squalls  in  beating  out  of  the 
harbor,  after  which  however  it  fell  nearly  calm.  Having 
doubled  Cape  Palbs,  a  low  sandy  point  with  a  watch-tower 
at  its  extremity,  near  which  are  three  small  islands,  called 
the  "  Hormigas,'7  we  anchored  at  Torre- vieja  about  three 
o'clock  in  the  afternoon,  finding  several  of  the  inhabitants 
on  the  look-out  for  us — as  the  Consul's  arrival  had  by  a  con- 
siderable time  preceded  our  own.  On  going  ashore  our 
friend  received  us,  and  led  the  way  to  his  mother's  house, 
where  we  were  hospitably  entreated  ;  and  after  remaining  a 
short  time  there,  started  to  examine  the  village,  which 
stands  upon  the  site  of  the  former  one.  The  streets  were 
very  wide,  enabling  the  natives  to  assemble  in  them  in  time 
of  danger,  and  the  houses  (one,  story  in  height)  built  of 
wood  and  cane,  these  materials  yielding  to  the  motion  of 
the  earth,  without  falling,  which  such  as  are  composed  of 
brick  or  stone  invariably  do.  We  were  assured  that  scarce- 
ly a  day  passed  without  their  owners  being  reminded  upon 
what  unstable  ground  they  dwell ;  that  animals,  such  as 
horses,  oxen,  mules,  &c.,  were  the  first  to  give  warning  of 
an  approaching  shock,  stopping  if  in  motion,  and  placing 
their  legs  apart  to  obtain  a  firmer  footing,  and  that  those 
who  were  accustomed  to  the  locality  were  more  sensitive 
than  strangers.  Familiarity  with  danger  blunts  the  appre- 
hension of  it ;  festive  groups  were  assembled  in  front  of  the 
houses,  enjoying  the  coolness  of  the  evening  ;  the  song  and 
the  merry  laugh  resourced  on  every  side,  and  it  might  have 
been  imagined  from  the  conduct  of  the  actors  in  the  scene, 
that  a  recurrence  of  an  event  similar  to  that  which  had 
destroyed  some  hundreds  of  their  countrymen,  a  short  time 
previous  was  beyond  the  bounds  of  possibility. 
13* 


298  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Not  long  before  our  visit  an  eminent  geologist  had  been 
sent  from  Madrid  to  investigate  the  cause  of  this  phenome- 
non, which  is  confined  to  a  comparatively  small  district. 
The  day  succeeding  his  arrival  shocks  were  felt,  which  con- 
tinued with  more  or  less  violence  during  the  remainder  of 
the  week.  The  philosopher  at  first  bore  them  patiently, 
but  at  length  he  fairly  took  to  his  heels,  vowing  an  infinite 
number  of  candles  to  the  Virgin,  and  declaring  that  for  all 
the  riches  of  the  world  he  would  not  live  in  so  horrid  a 
place. 

Salt  is  exported  in  large  quantities  from  this  place,  chiefly 
to  the  north  of  Europe,  and  three  Swedish  brigs  were  at  an- 
chor waiting  for  cargoes  of  this  article. 

Lingering  on  shore  till  between  eleven  and  twelve  at 
night,  trusting  that  what  we  anxiously  hoped  for  might 
take  place,  we  were  nevertheless  compelled  to  embark  with- 
out our  wishes  being  gratified,  but  comforted  with  the 
assurance  that  so  long  a  cessation  of  "  qua  kings  "  had  not 
been  known  for  a  considerable  period.  After  returning  to 
the  "  Midge,"  we  remained  long  on  deck  both  to  enjoy  the 
beauty  of  the  evening,  and  that  in  case  of  a  shock  taking 
place,  we  might  be  on  the  alert,  the  sensation  when  on  the 
water  resembling  that  of  striking  on  a  rock. 

The  morning  of  the  10th  broke  gloriously,  and  with 
a  pleasant  breeze,  and  merely  a  ripple  on  the  sea,  we  set  sail 
for  Alicante.  The  wind,  however,  drew  ahead,  and  soon 
after  deserted  us  altogether.  Between  nine  and  ten  o'clock 
we  could  see,  with  the  aid  of  a  glass,  the  ruins  of  two  vil- 
lages, demolished  by  the  same  earthquake  which  had  so 
grievously  maltreated  "  Torra-vieja."  Off  Santa  Pola  we 
hove  to,  in  order  to  land  the  boy  who  had  accompanied  us 
from  Gibraltar  at  his  native  village,  and  the  breeze  having 
again  freshened,  we  had  to  beat  the  whole  distance  to  Ali- 
cante, in  the  roadstead  of  which  we  anchored,  between  four 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  299 

and  five  in  the  afternoon,  and  being  admitted  to  pratique, 
lost  no  time  in  landing.  The  custom-house  officials  acted 
with  unusual  incivility,  opening  our  carpet  bags  and  strew- 
ing the  contents  on  the  pier.  This  conduct  secured  for 
them  the  "  gain  of  a  loss,"  as  we  in  consequence  withheld 
the  fee  usually  presented  to  these  jacks-in-office.  Receiving 
every  attention  from  the  consul  (Mr.  Waring),  we  put  up  at 
an  hotel  in  the  Plaza  del  Mar,  and  passed  the  night  (I 
cannot  say  slept)  ashore  for  the  first  time  since  leaving 
Gibraltar.  Whether  this  state  of  unrest  was  caused  by  the 
attacks  of  certain  active  little  tormentors,  by  the  closeness 
of  the  house,  by  missing  the  accustomed  motion  of  the  ves- 
sel, or  by  all  three  combined,  it  matters  not,  but  our  antici- 
pations of  unbroken  repose  were  cruelly  disappointed. 

The  town  of  Alicante,  in  the  province  of  Valencia,  stands 
close  to  the  sea  shore,  overhung  by  a  lofty  rock  some  thou- 
sand feet  in  height,  crowned  at  its  summit  by  a  castle. 
The  streets  were  clean,  and  houses  good,  the  flooring  of  the 
rooms  (if  it  may  be  so  expressed)  being  composed  of  a  kind 
of  porcelain,  painted  with  various  devices,  well  adapted  to 
the  sultry  climate.  The  fortifications  appeared  strong,  but 
an  application  on  our  part  for  permission  to  visit  the  castle 
was  refused,  on  the  plea  of  state  prisoners  being  confined 
there.  Part  of  the  rock  was  blown  up  by  the  French  in 
the  year  1701,  at  the  conclusion  of  a  siege  of  long  duration, 
in  which  the  English  were  the  defenders.  The  country  in 
the  neighborhood  is  very  fertile,  and  the  olive  trees  are 
remarkably  fine.  Salt  is  also  made  in  the  vicinity,  and 
exported  from  Torre-vieja. 

Being  in  the  habit  of  wearing  our  usual  boating-dress, 
(white  jackets,  white  pantaloons,  and  straw  hats,)  when 
landing  at  the  different  towns  where  we  touched,  we  be- 
came in  consequence  marked  objects,  and  were  frequently 
saluted  with  the  title  of  "locos  Ingleses,"  (mad  English- 


300  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

men,)  and  the  anxiety  of  the  female  part  of  the  community 
to  get  a  sight  of  persons  thus  honorably  designated,  was 
very  ludicrous. 

While  sauntering  through  the  streets  towards  the  close 
of  the  afternoon,  we  encountered  a  rush  of  persons  running 
furiously  in  a  direction  opposite  to  that  in  which  we  were 
moving,  and  on  inquiring  the  reason,  found  they  were  retir- 
ing from  the  unwelcome  proximity  of  a  bull,  who,  with  a 
long  rope  tied  round  his  horns,  held  by  a  number  of  men  at 
some  distance  behind,  was  thus  permitted  to  take  his  head- 
long course.  The  unfortunate  animal,  maddened  by  the 
blows  and  shouts  of  the  pursuing  population,  tore  fran- 
ticly  along,  and  before  we  well  knew  what  we  were  about, 
two  of  us  were  forced  into  a  shop  by  the  crowd,  I  being 
left  at  the  door  in  such  a  position  that  escape  was  out  of 
the  question.  On  came  the  bull,  stopping  in  front  of  the 
very  place  at  which  I  was  posted,  my  comfort  being  in  no 
degree  added  to  by  the  information  (conveyed  to  me  by 
some  kind  friend  inside)  that  the  "toro"  was  a  remarkably 
savage  one,  and  having  already  killed  two  real  men,  had 
become  so  fastidious  as  utterly  to  scout  the  sham  represent- 
ations of  the  "genus  homo,"  frequently  lowered  from  the 
windows  of  houses  for  his  own  especial  amusement.  Tak- 
ing off  my  hat,  the  only  offensive  weapon  I  possessed,  I  was 
prepared  to  strike  him  over  the  nose,  when  a  native  (a  short 
distance  off)  threw  his  cloak  across  the  ground,  and  the  bull 
darting  off  in  hot  pursuit,  I  found  myself  extricated  from 
this  unpleasant  predicament.  A  pilot  being  engaged  for 
the  voyage  from  Alicante  to  Barcelona,  and  to  return  with 
us  to  the  former  town,  we  proceeded  on  our  cruise  between 
ten  and  eleven  at  night,  with  a  light  north-westerly  breeze, 
and  the  following  morning  doubled  Cape  San  Antonio,  the 
wind  blowing  strong  from  the  south.  A  gale  from  the 
eastward  with  a  heavy  sea  (both  of  which  moderated 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  301 

towards  evening)  compelled  us  to  put  back  to  Denia,  the 
access  to  the  anchorage  being  through  a  narrow  channel 
with  sandbanks  on  either  side,  covered  with  a  trifling  depth 
of  water.  Upon  one  of  these  the  pilot  ran  us  aground, 
and  had  the  weather  continued  as  boisterous  as  daring  the 
early  part  of  the  day,  the  cutter  must  inevitably  have  gone 
to  pieces ;  even  as  it  was  she  struck  hard,  and  we  much 
feared  she  would  have  sustained  serious  damage,  but  after 
an  hour's  labor  she  was  fortunately  got  off  with  only  trifling 
injury.  On  the  first  semblance  of  danger  our  "  Palinurus" 
commenced  praying  to  his  patron  saint,  a  proceeding  soon 
put  a  stop  to  by  our  threatening  to  throw  him  overboard  if 
he  did  not  instantly  cease  and  assist  the  crew.  By  ten 
o'clock  we  were  safely  anchored,  and  though  the  night  was 
dark,  had  a  good  view  of  the  town  and  of  the  few  vessels  in 
the  roads  by  the  glare  of  continued  flashes  of  lightning. 
The  13th  dawned  cloudlessly  upon  us,  but  the  weather  be- 
ing stormy  we  remained  in  statu  quo,  and  II- and  B 

went  ashore,  and  paid  their  respects  to  the  commandant, 
who  received  them  in  bed,  and  upon  being  informed  of  the 
nature  of  their  expedition  exclaimed,  "None  but  English- 
men could  have  undertaken  it." 

Denia,  in  the  province  of  Valencia,  lies  under  a  rock  or 
mountain  of  great  height.  The  town  is  a  poor  one,  for  the 
sea  having  receded  has  almost  destroyed  the  trade.  In  the 
neighborhood,  olive  trees  and  vines  flourish  in  profusion. 
About  two  o'clock  in  the  afternoon  a  sudden  shift  of  wind 
to  the  south-west  caused  us  to  lose  no  time  in  getting  under 
weigh,  passing  in  the  course  of  the  day  the  towns  or  rather 
villages  of  Almandrave,  Olivas,  Pilas,  and  Gandia.  The 
breeze  continued  in  the  same  quarter  all  night,  but  a  head 
sea  much  impeded  our  progress,  causing  the  cutter  to  pitch 
heavily.  The  pilot  expressed  great  anxiety  lest  a  north- 
east gale  should  come  on,  in  which  case  he  declared  we  must 


302  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

run  back  to  Alicante,  as  he  would  not  venture  upon  a  second 
attempt  to  make  Denia.  The  native  sailors  dread  the  whole 
of  this  part  of  the  coast,  as  when  the  wind  blows  strong 
from  the  quarter  alluded  to,  a  tremendous  sea  breaks  with 
unmitigated  fury  upon  a  long  tract  of  sandy  shore  almost 
destitute  of  any  refuge, 

Between  twelve  and  one  o'clock  the  following  day,  we 
anchored  at  the  Grao  or  port  of  Yalencia,  during  a  gale 
from  the  south-west,  to  the  force  of  which  it  is  much  ex- 
posed, and  the  yacht  for  a  short  time  was  in  some  little 
jeopardy.  Two  strands  of  the  cable  parted  soon  after  the 
anchor  took  the  ground,  when  a  second  was  let  go  and  ca- 
ble veered  upon  each.  The  topmast  was  struck,  bowsprit 
run  in  upon  deck,  and  hatches  battened  down.  Finding 
the  cutter  dragging,  we  had  recourse  to  our  third  and 
largest  anchor,  which  fortunately  brought  us  up  within  a 
short  distance  of  the  breakers.  To  have  worked  out  to  sea 
in  the  teeth  of  the  gale  would  have  been  impossible,  and 
had  we  gone  ashore,  not  much  would  have  been  left  of  the 
poor  little  "  Midge." 

"  A  miss  is  as  good  as  a  mile,"  saith  the  proverb,  and 
the  weather  becoming  moderate  towards  evening  we  took 
up  a  more  favorable  berth,  and  landed  between  six  and 
seven  o'clock.  A  "  tartana,"  a  kind  of  van  without  springs, 
drawn  by  one  horse,  (the  common  conveyance  of  the  coun- 
try,) was  put  in  requisition  to  take  us  to  Yalencia,  distant 
about  two  miles,  the  road  the  whole  way  being  planted  on 
either  side  with  fine  trees,  producing  a  most  delightful  and 
refreshing  shade.  Numbers  of  persons  of  both  sexes,  and 
"tartanas"  innumerable,  were  passing  and  repassing  along 
this  agreeable  drive.  Being  ignorant  of  the  topography, 
our  "Jehu"  was  ordered  to  take  us  to  the  best  hotel  in  the 
town,  upon  which  we  found  ourselves  at  the  "Fonda  de  la 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  303 

Paz,"  which  he  declared  to  be  unequalled,  though  whether 
such  was  the  case  or  not,  we  had  no  time  to  discover. 

Having  refreshed  the  inner  man,  we  sallied  forth  into  the 
streets,  which  were  narrow,  crooked,  unpaved,  and  gloomy, 
still  retaining  the  character  given  by  their  Moorish  possess- 
ors, and  the  appearance  of  the  natives  at  this  day  bears  a 
strong  resemblance  to  that  of  the  inhabitants  of  the  oppo- 
site coast.  Numbers  of  women  (whose  complexion  was 
less  swarthy  than  that  of  the  men)  were  seated  in  the  open 
air  pursuing  their  several  avocations  ;  their  heads  uncovered, 
and  their  hair  fastened  at  the  back  with  huge  gilt  pins.  It 
being  too  late  in  the  day  to  visit  the  cathedral,  we  made 
our  way  to  the  river  Guadalaviar,  at  this  time  an  insignifi- 
cant stream,  and  so  nearly  dried  up,  that  a  market  was  held 
in  its  bed.  When  swollen,  however,  by  winter  rains,  it  be- 
comes an  impetuous  torrent,  and  the  length  of  some  of  the 
bridges  (five  in  number)  testifies  its  width,  under  these  cir- 
cumstances, to  be  very  considerable.  We  much  admired 
the  prospect  from  the  Puente  del  Mar.  Close  at  hand  were 
the  walls  of  the  town  following  the  course  of  the  river,  the 
bridges,  ever  picturesque  objects,  diverting  the  eye  from  its 
uninteresting  condition.  Beyond  were  various  roads  lead- 
ing to  the  "  huerta,"  the  latter  clothed  in  perpetual  verdure, 
and  brought  by  the  marvellously  perfect  system  of  irrigation, 
introduced  by  its  ancient  and  maintained  by  its  present  pos- 
sessors, into  a  state  of  fertility  entitling  it  to  the  appellation 
of  the  "  Garden  of  Spain." 

We  proceeded  thence  to  the  "  Glorieta,"  the  fashionable 
promenade  of  Yalencia,  planted  and  provided  with  foun- 
tains ;  numbers  of  persons  were  here  congregated,  and  the 
"  sefioritas  "  present  appeared  in  no  way  inferior  to  those  of 
their  countrywomen  whom  we  had  already  met  with,  either 
in  personal  charms  or  in  their  knowledge  of  displaying  them 


304  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

to  the  best  advantage.  Here  we  remained  a  considerable 
time,  admiring  the  varied  dress  of  the  passing  groups,  our 
own  unsophisticated  apparel  contrasting  strangely  with  the 
butterfly  costumes  of  the  light-hearted  crowd  surrounding 
us,  to  whom  we  in  our  turn  were  evidently  objects  of  much 
curiosity.  It  was  late  at  night  ere  we  sought  repose,  giv- 
ing strict  injunctions  before  doing  so,  that  we  should  be 
roused  early  in  the  morning,  in  order  to  waste  as  little  as 
possible  of  the  short  time  we  had  it  in  our  power  to  devote 
to  the  inspection  of  this  famous  city. 

By  seven  o'clock  we  were  ready  to  commence  our  pere- 
grinations, and,  as  a  matter  of  course,  bent  our  steps  in  the 
first  instance  to  the  cathedral,  the  tower  of  which,  stand- 
ing separate  from  the  main  building,  between  one  hundred 
and  sixty  and  one  hundred  and  seventy  feet  in  height,  was  as- 
cended. From  its  summit  was  a  splendid  view  of  the  adja- 
cent plains,  teeming  with  fertility,  and  producing  in  the 
greatest  profusion,  corn,  rice,  and  every  description  of  food 
for  man  and  beast.  Mulberry,  orange,  and  palm  trees,  are 
thickly  spread  throughout  its  whole  extent,  and  we  gazed, 
and  gazed,  and  gazed  again  upon  the  unsurpassable  beauty 
of  the  prospect,  heightened  and  increased  by  the  lustrous 
brightness  of  a  cloudless  summer  sky.  The  architecture  of 
the  cathedral  is  partly  Gothic ;  on  the  back  of  the  choir 
(worked  in  alabaster)  are  representations  of  scriptural  sub- 
jects. The  seats  are  handsomely  carved  ;  behind  the  altar 
are  some  curiously  painted  doors,  and  the  church  possesses 
fine  pictures  by  different  artists.  Hiring  horses,  we  made 
the  circuit  of  the  town,  (the  walls  and  some  of  the  towers 
of  which  are  in  excellent  preservation,)  and  subsequently 
effected  a  short  excursion  into  the  country,  which  fully  real- 
ized the  expectations  we  had  formed  of  its  beauty  from  the 
view  obtained  in  the  morning  from  the  tower  of  the  cathe- 
dral. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          305 

On  returning  from  our  ride,  visited  the  "  Plaza  Santa 
Catalina,"  El  Mercado,  the  "  Calle  de  Caballeros,"  and  en- 
tered a  shop  in  which  were  sold  that  peculiar  species  of  tile, 
bearing  the  name  of  the  town,  which  have  been  already  al- 
luded to,  as  being  used  instead  of  flooring.  The  blue  and 
purple  colors  were  very  rich,  and  the  tile  is  expensive,  owing 
to  the  difficulty  of  bringing  out  a  perfect  article.  Patios 
surrounded  by  colonnades  appeared  almost  as  common  to 
the  houses  here  as  to  those  of  Andalusia.  The  number  and 
importunity  of  the  beggars  of  Valencia  exceeded  anything 
we  had  met  with,  (even  in  this  land  of  beggars,)  for  no 
sooner  was  one  set  disposed  of,  than  another  swarm  were 
always  ready  to  take  their  places. 

Whilst  reposing  in  our  inn  after  the  fatigues  of  the  day, 
a  commotion  in  the  street  induced  us  to  move  towards 
the  window,  to  discover  the  cause  of  the  uproar,  when  it 
appeared  that  two  men  having  quarrelled  were  proceeding 
to  settle  their  differences  with  the  knife,  when  the  bystand- 
ers (among  whom  were  some  women)  thought  fit  to  inter- 
fere. The  violent  gesticulations,  flashing  eyes,  and  bronzed 
countenances  of  the  parties  concerned,  reminded  me  strongly 
of  a  fracas  of  a  similar  nature  I  had  witnessed  in  Barbary, 
swords  being  substituted  for  the  weapons  now  used,  and  fe- 
males being  left  out  of  the  question.  The  combatants  were 
not  easily  pacified,  and  furious  attempts  at  stabbing,  parried 
by  the  left  arm  wrapped  in  the  "  manta,"  had  already  been 
made,  when  two  or  three  of  the  softer  sex  threw  themselves 
upon  the  antagonists,  completely  frustrating  their  attempts 
at  mischief.  The  chattering  that  ensued  (totally  unintelli- 
gible to  us,  the  conversation  being  carried  on  in  the  patois 
of  the  country)  was  perfectly  deafening ;  but  at  length  the 
principals,  scowling,  and  muttering,  as  we  were  told,  threats 
of  future  vengeance,  were  led  away  in  opposite  directions, 
by  their  respective  friends  ;  the  affair  ending  for  the  present, 


306  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

at  all  events,  without  bloodshed,  but  it  afforded  a  fine  spe- 
cimen of  the  temperament  of  this  excitable  people,  and  the 
insecurity  and  little  value  placed  by  them  upon  human  life. 

In  the  evening  we  repaired  to  the  caf6  to  eat  ices  and 
amuse  ourselves  with  watching  the  manners  of  the  persons 
there  assembled.  Gaiety  and  good  humor  were  in  the  as- 
cendant, and  music  occasionally  lent  its  aid  towards  increas- 
ing the  harmony  of  the  entertainment.  Entering  into  con- 
versation with  some  well-dressed  persons  near  us,  we  found 
that  they  supposed  that  all  Englishmen  came  from  London, 
having  an  idea  that  London  and  England  were  synonymous, 
while  of  the  geography  of  many  of  the  principal  towns  of 
their  own  country,  they  possessed  but  little  knowledge.  They 
were,  however,  extremely  polite,  insisting  upon  liquidating 
the  expense  of  our  refreshment,  (which  compliment  we  re- 
turned,) and  after  remaining  till  rather  a  late  hour,  we  parted 
with  mutual  expressions  of  good-will. 

On  the  16th  of  the  month,  no  letters  having  arrived  for 
us  from  Gibraltar,  we  determined  on  proceeding  to  Barce- 
lona. Hiring  a  tartana  we  returned  to  the  Grao,  embarked 
on  board  the  cutter  about  eleven  o'clock,  and  gpt  under 
weigh  at  one,  with  a  slight  north-easterly  breeze.  Murvie- 
dro,  the  ancient  Saguntum,  was  sighted  during  the  after- 
noon, and  as  the  wind  freshened  considerably  towards  night, 
with  a  heavy  swell  from  the  eastward,  and  much  lightning, 
we  reduced  our  canvas  and  struck  the  topmast. 

The  next  morning,  finding  ourselves  almost  becalmed, 
with  what  little  air  there  was  drawing  to  the  south-west,  all 
sail  was  again  made  ;  the  heat  was  intense  ;  an  universal 
white  glare  overspread  the  sky,  the  wind  had  scarcely 
strength  to  fill  the  sails,  or  ruffle  the  surface  of  the  long 
swells  which  heaved  noiselessly  around,  and  the  general  ap- 
pearance of  the  atmosphere  betokened  an  approaching 
change.  This  unsatisfactory  state  of  affairs  continued  till 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  307 

towards  evening,  when  the  breeze  gradually  freshening,  and 
heavy,  lurid  clouds  rising  in  masses  to  windward,  gave  warn- 
ing that  our  anticipations  were  likely  to  be  verified.  The 
gaft  topsail  was  taken  in,  topmast  struck,  mainsail  and  fore- 
sail close  reefed,  jibs  shifted,  mizen  furled,  hatches  battened 
down,  and  every  preparation  made  to  resist  the  fury  of  the 
storm. 

About  six  o'clock,  gusts  of  wind,  accompanied  with  vivid 
lightning,  and  peals  of  thunder,  announced  that  the  war  of 
elements  was  about  to  commence.  For  about  half  an  hour 
after,  it  blew  a  steady  gale,  when  in  a  short  time  a  violent 
squall  compelled  us  to  furl  our  mainsail,  and  scud  under 
bare  poles.  The  sea  was  whirled  aloft  in  foam  and  spray, 
the  air  was  one  continued  blaze  of  quivering,  blinding  light- 
ning, the  thunder  rattled  amid  the  blast,  the  wind  whistled 
through  the  rigging,  the  rain  poured  down  in  torrents,  and 
it  seemed  as  if  the  demon  of  the  tempest  had  exhausted  all 
its  fury  upon  our  devoted  heads.  Onwards  flew  the 
"  Midge/'  almost  rivalling  its  namesake  in  the  vivacity  of 
its  motions,  and  whilst  passing  Peniscola,  (a  conical  rock, 
surmounted  with  a  castle,)  during  the  height  of  the  squall, 
a  schooner  anchored  close  in  shore  hoisted  a  small  English 
ensign.  The  well-known  color  was  hailed  by  us  with  de- 
light, not  that  in  case  of  mishap  any  assistance  could  have 
been  rendered,  but  it  was  cheering  amidst  the  surrounding 
turmoil  to  see  our  country's  flag  so  proudly  floating  in  the 
howling  storm.  The  fury  of  the  wind  abated  as  suddenly  as 
it  had  arisen,  and  sail  being  again  made,  we  reached  Yinaroz 
between  nine  and  ten,  and  anchored  there  for  the  night. 

By  three  o'clock  on  the  morning  of  the  18th,  we  were 
again  under  weigh,  with  a  moderate  easterly  breeze.  The 
river  Ebro  empties  itself  into  the  Mediterranean  at  the  port 
of  Alfaques,  about  five-and-twenty  miles  from  Yinaroz, 
sand-banks  rendering  the  coast  in  this  neighborhood  excess- 


308  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

ively  dangerous.  Towards  evening  the  wind  again  changed 
to  the  south-west,  and  soon  after  fell  calm. 

The  pleasure  of  navigating  the  Mediterranean  is  frequent- 
ly the  theme  of  discourse,  and  the  climate  is  certainly  deli- 
cious, but  the  winds  are  baffling,  the  sea  short  and  broken 
when  blowing  fresh,  and  the  sudden  alternations  of  calm 
and  storm,  and  storm  and  calm,  must  be  experienced  to  be 
thoroughly  comprehended.  From  the  dawn  of  the  following 
day  till  evening,  light  airs  from  the  eastward  prevailed,  and 
at  intervals  we  toiled  hard  at  the  sweeps.  Sunset  was  mag- 
nificent. Sea  and  sky  sparkled  like  gold,  and  as  the  orb  of 
day  sunk  into  the  western  waves,  columns  of  light  (fit  em- 
blems of  its  departing  glory)  shot  brilliantly  across  the 
arch  of  heaven.  When  darkness  closed  around  us,  the 
stars  looked  calmly  down,  veiling  their  modest  beauty,  when 
with  refulgent  splendor  a  glorious  moon  rose  solemnly  o'er 
the  tranquil  sea.  Between  eleven  and  twelve  at  night  we 
reached  Barcelona,  and  as  soon  as  the  sails  were  furled  and 
everything  made  snug,  all  hands  turned  in,  and  in  a  few 
minutes  were  lost  in  the  regions  of  oblivion,  for  we  had  had 
a  hard  day's  work,  and  were  much  fatigued  with  the  labor 
of  continual  sweeping.  Our  slumbers,  though  profound, 
were  not  destined  to  be  of  long  duration,  for  soon  after 
dawn  on  the  20th,  the  thunder  of  a  salute  from  a  brig  of 
war,  close  to  which  we  had  anchored  the  night  before, 
roused  us  from  repose.  Landing  about  seven,  we  put  up  at 
the  Fonda  de  la  Constancia,  a  second-rate  house,  but  so 
crowded  was  the  town,  from  the  numbers  of  people  flocking 
into  it  from  the  country  to  participate  in  the  approaching 
festivities,  that  we  were  fortunate  in  obtaining  accommoda- 
tion anywhere,  and  its  situation  moreover  possessed  the 
advantage  of  being  at  no  great  distance  from  the  harbor. 

Starting  very  soon  after  breakfast  upon  an  exploration 
of  this,  the  chief  town  of  Cataluna,  the  change  in  the  cos- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  309 

tume  of  the  peasantry  immediately  attracted  our  attention. 
Long  red  woollen  caps,  one  end  hanging  down  the  back  of 
the  neck,  (giving  the  appearance  of  bags,)  very  wide  trou- 
sers of  dark-colored  material  reaching  almost  to  the  arm- 
pits, a  jacket  (very  short  in  the  waist)  generally  thrown 
over  the  shoulder,  and  a  gorgeous  sash,  composed  the  dress 
of  the  men.  With  the  women,  mantillas  were  at  a  discount, 
handkerchiefs  generally  superseding  them,  and  huge  ear- 
rings, some  of  them  apparently  of  great  value,  seemed  every- 
where much  in  vogue.  Of  a  fairer  complexion  than  the 
Andaluzas,  they  were  as  little  to  be  compared  to  them  in 
grace  and  elegance  of  figure,  as  the  cart-horse  to  the  high- 
bred, fine-limbed  racer.  The  streets  are  narrow,  but  the 
public  promenades  particularly  fine.  The  principal  one,  the 
Rambla,  planted  with  trees,  is  the  centre  and  great 
thoroughfare  of  the  town,  and  there  are  likewise  Paseos 
both  on  the  land  and  sea  sides,  the  latter  being  the  resort 
of  the  beauty  and  fashion  of  the  place,  who  here  congregate 
to  enjoy  the  freshness  of  the  evening  breeze  ;  and  as  the 
northern  stranger  paces  backward  and  forward,  charmed 
with  the  picturesque  effect  of  the  many-colored  costumes,  his 
eye  involuntarily  wanders  to  the  brilliant  sky,  the  deep-blue 
sea,  and  the  indented  coast,  whose  distant  points  are  by  the 
clearness  of  the  atmosphere  brought  as  it  were  close  within 
his  reach,  and  the  conviction  unwittingly  forces  itself  upon 
his  mind,  how  far  inferior  is  the  climate  of  his  own  land  of  mist 
and  rain,  to  that  of  the  sunny  and  beauteous  south.  The 
walk  round  the  ramparts  abounds  in  beautiful  views,  em- 
bracing mountains,  highly  cultivated  plains,  the  fortification 
of  Monjuich,  and  the  Mediterranean  sea.  In  addition  to 
those  already  named,  there  are  several  others  equally  plea- 
sant, and  the  superiority  of  Spanish  over  English  towns 
in  this  particular  is  very  remarkable.  The  providing  of 
places  of  recreation,  entirely  open  to  the  public,  is  a  custom 


310  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;   OB, 

worthy  of  imitation,  for  did  .such  exist  in  our  own  large 
cities,  the  artisan  population  could  resort  thither  when  the 
toil  of  the  day  was  over,  instead  (as  is  too  frequently  the 
case)  of  being  compelled  to  seek  for  amusement  in  dens  of 
vice  and  infamy.  The  cathedral  has  two  towers,  from  the 
top  of  which  is  a  splendid  view  of  the  neighboring  country. 
The  painted  glass  in  the  windows  is  rich  in  the  extreme, 
and  the  screen  (ornamented  with  purple  and  gold,  with  a 
column  of  red  marble  on  either  side,  crowned  with  an  angel 
holding  a  torch)  has  a  fine  effect.  Some  sculptured  figures 
with  large  scissors  and  boots  attracting  our  attention,  we 
were  informed  that  in  days  of  yore  the  tailors  and  shoe- 
makers had  been  of  great  service  to  the  cathedral,  and  that 
these  images  had  been  put  up  in  honor  of  them.  There  are 
several  other  churches,  but  we  did  not  visit  them. 

After  wandering  about  all  day,  we  proceeded  on  board 
the  cutter,  giving  orders  that  she  should  be  hove  down,  her 
bottom  examined,  and  her  rigging  thoroughly  set  up.  Bar- 
celoneta  is  an  ugly  suburb,  inhabited  by  an  amphibious  race 
of  beings,  of  every  genus  connected  with  the  sea.  The 
harbor  is  large,  protected  from  storms  by  a  mole  of  con- 
siderable length,  and  from  hostile  aggression  by  the  citadel 
and  a  smaller  fort,  both  of  which  are  commanded  by  Mon- 
juich.  A  few  coasting  and  other  vessels,  with  two  Spanish 
brigs  of  war,  and  three  or  four  guarda  costas,  comprised  the 
whole  of  the  shipping  then  anchored  there.  Having  (in  the 
evening)  passed  an  hour  on  the  "  Muralla  del  Mar,"  we  ad- 
journed to  a  cafe,  and  spent  a  short  time  there  very  agree- 
ably, making  acquaintance  with  some  officers  of  a  regiment 
of  Royal  Guards  stationed  at  Barcelona,  whom  we  found 
gentlemanly  and  well-informed.  The  hill  of  Monjuich, 
about  a  mile  from  the  town,  crowned  with  the  fort  of  that 
name,  is  approached  by  a  zig-zag  road,  and  though  the 
ascent  is  steep,  the  magnificent  view  of  the  Mediterranean, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  311 

and  of  the  city  beneath,  amply  repays  the  trouble.  The 
fortifications  are  very  strong,  and  if  well  provisioned,  ade- 
quately garrisoned,  and  firmly  defended,  are  from  their  po- 
sition almost  impregnable.  Our  request  to  examine  the 
works  was  civilly  refused,  so  retracing  our  steps,  we  made 
a  detour  to  visit  what  is  supposed  to  have  been  the  Jews' 
burying-ground,  but  found  nothing  to  reward  our  curiosity, 
save  some  large  stones,  with  unintelligible  inscriptions. 

An  early  opportunity  was  taken  of  seeing  the  guards  un- 
der arms  ;  and  a  fine-looking  corps  they  were,  well  dressed, 
and  well  appointed,  but  their  movements  wanted  the  regu- 
larity and  steadiness  of  those  of  English  troops.  Individu- 
ally, they  were  stalwart  men,  containing  the  raw  material 
of  excellent  soldiers,  and  were  smarter  in  their  appearance 
off  duty  than  any  infantry  we  had  hitherto  met  with  in  the 
country.  The  undress  of  the  officers,  blue  coatees,  and 
cocked  hats  bound  with  silver  lace,  had  an  exceedingly  neat 
effect.  The  principal  public  buildings  are  the  Exchange, 
the  Foundry,  the  Captain-General's  Palace,  and  the  Casa 
de  Caridad.  The  language  spoken  by  the  natives  is  a 
patois,  in  which  villainously  pronounced  French  is  discerni- 
ble, and  falls  harshly  and  unpleasantly  on  the  ear. 

On  the  morning  of  the  22d,  B started,  per  diligence, 

for  Perpignan,  en  route  for  England,  and  in  the  evening, 

R, and  I  attended  the  theatre,  and  found  the  acting 

and  dancing  very  indifferent.  The  expected  order  for  com- 
mencing the  ceremonies  in  honor  of  the  young  Queen  hav- 
ing arrived,  the  festivities  commenced  on  the  24th  by 
figures  of  the  King,  Queen,  and  the  little  Isabella,  ele- 
gantly attired,  being  placed  on  a  highly  decorated  platform 
in  front  of  the  Captain-General's  residence,  and  were  wel- 
comed by  thousands  of  spectators  with  loud  "vivas," 
though  at  the  same  time  many  present  were  of  opinion  that 
Don  Carlos  had  been  hardly  dealt  with,  the  repeal  of  the 


312  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Salic  law  having  been  obtained  by  the  artifices  of  Christina. 
A  strong  guard  of  soldiers  was  present  to  keep  order,  and 
add  importance  to  the  pageant.  Troops  of  maskers,  repre- 
senting dragons,  horses,  bears,  and  outlandish  figures  of 
every  description,  accompanied  with  bands  of  music,  paraded 
the  streets,  and  afforded  much  amusement  by  their  grotesque 
appearance.  In  the  evening  a  salute  was  fired  from  all  the 
batteries,  from  Monjuich,  and  from  the  ships  of  war ;  the 
cafes  were  thronged,  and  hundreds  were  abroad  till  a  late 
hour.  The  following  day  the  captain-geueral  and  the  au- 
thorities proceeded  to  the  cathedral  to  take  the  oath  of 
allegiance  to  the  young  Queen,  presents  of  clothes  being 
afterwards  distributed  to  numerous  indigent  persons,  the 
town  presenting  a  most  animated  appearance,  from  the 
numbers  of  the  peasantry  in  holiday  garb,  moving  in  every 
direction,  and  the  active  preparations  going  forward  on  all 
sides  for  a  general  illumination,  which  was  to  commence  at 
ten  at  night.  At  the  appointed  hour  a  glare  of  light  blazed 
forth,  and  much  taste  was  displayed  in  the  arrangements,  the 
devices  in  several  instances  being  very  beautiful.  Amongst 
the  most  remarkable  was  a  triumphal  arch  at  the  barracks 
of  the  guards,  composed  of  variegated  lamps,  and  allegori- 
cal representations  similarly  formed  were  placed  in  front  of 
the  Exchange  and  the  "  Real  Palacio."  The  trees  in  the 
public  walks  glittered  with  tiny  lamps  suspended  amid  their 
branches,  the  fronts  of  the  houses  were  covered  with  white 
linen  festooned  with  flowers,  arches  composed  of  evergreens 
spanned  the  streets,  temporary  fountains  played  at  short 
intervals,  songs  were  chanted  in  honor  of  the  occasion, 
music  sent  forth  its  dulcet  strains,  pleasure  was  depicted  in 
every  face,  and  what  with  the  brilliant  moon  and  stars 
above,  and  the  glittering  scene  below,  the  sight  accorded 
more  with  the  representation  of  a  fairy  tale  than  with  the 
sober  reality  of  real  life.  Fun  and  merriment  lasted  all 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  313 

night,  and  early  morning  had  arrived  ere  we  could  make  up 
our  minds  to  retire  to  our  hotel.  A  sham  fight  taking 
place  the  ensuing  evening,  the  consul  procured  for  us  tick- 
ets of  admission  to  the  Mole,  which  was  set  apart  for  the 
convenience  of  respectable  spectators.  A  fort  mounting 
three  guns  was  attacked  by  a  division  of  boats,  covered  by 
the  fire  of  two  large  guafda  costas.  The  assailants  made 
good  their  landing,  but  after  a  short  conflict  were  supposed 
to  be  repulsed,  and  retreated  to  their  boats,  the  guarda 
costas  standing  close  in  to  protect  them  whilst  retiring.  It 
was  but  a  paltry  exhibition,  and  little  merited  the  applause 
bestowed  upon  it  by  the  admiring  natives.  I  had  a  long 
conversation  with  the'  French  consul,  who,  upon  my  point- 
ing out  the  boat  in  which  we  had  come  from  the  Rock,  ex- 
pressed great  surprise,  and  said  that  officers  of  the  French 
army  would  never  have  attempted  anything  of  the  kind ; 
but,  added  he,  "  Englishmen  are  born  half  sailors." 

On  the  27th,  at  ten  o'clock,  was  a  miserable  performance 
ycleped  a  regatta,  and  at  four  in  the  afternoon  a  tourna- 
ment. A  large  wooden  amphitheatre  was  erected  for  the 
purpose,  and  was  crowded  from  the  lowest  to  the  highest 
seats.  The  knights  clad  in  armor  (which  some  persons 
near  us  declared  was  tin)  tilted  at  each  other,  but  their 
efforts  to  unhorse  their  adversaries  (if  such  was  their  inten- 
tion) were  very  ridiculous.  By  some  regulation  unknown 
to  us,  one  of  the  performers  was  declared  the  victor,  and 
was  conducted  to  a  lady  personating  the  "  Queen  of  Beau- 
ty," who  crowned  him  with  laurel.  Courses  were  then  run 
at  the  figure  of  a  man  working  on  a  pivot,  holding  a  large 
sand-bag  in  one  of  its  hands.  If  struck  fairly  with  the 
lance,  it  spun  round,  and  the  attacking  party  escaped  un- 
touched ;  if  otherwise,  he  received  a  tremendous  buffet — 
which  last  one  or  two  only  escaped.  This  caused  great 
diversion^  and  the  unfortunate  ones  were  greeted  with  roars 

14 


314  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;  OR, 

of  laughter  and  every  imaginable  epithet  of  ridicule.  This 
closed  the  rejoicings  in  honor  of  an  ordinance  which  has 
since  caused  rivers  of  blood  to  flow  in  unhappy  Spain.  But 
three  weeks  of  our  leave  remained,  and  anticipating  a  long 
voyage  back  to  Gibraltar,  on  account  of  the  prevalence  of 
westerly  winds,  on  the  28th  we  put  to  sea  on  our  return 
home,  and,  after  successive  alternations  of  head  winds,  fair 
winds,  strong  breezes  and  calms,  during  the  former  of  which 
we  sustained  a  trifling  damage,  anchored  at  Alicante,  on 
the  afternoon  of  the  2d  of  July,  the  only  incident  worthy 
of  record  being  that,  while  scudding  before  a  smart  gale  off 

Cape  San  Antonio,  R roused  me  from  my  watch  below 

to  say  that,  although  no  clouds  were  to  be  seen,  the  moon 
'  had  gradually  disappeared,  and  that  he  could  not  account 
for  it.  Of  the  reason  I  was  equally  ignorant,  when,  soon 
after  discovering  the  fair  "  Luna"  again  making  her  appear- 
ance from  behind  the  shadow  that  had  concealed  her,  the 
conviction  at  once  flashed  upon  our  minds  that  an  eclipse 
(totally  unexpected  by  us)  must  necessarily  have  taken 
place. 

On  the  3d,  we  were  again  under  weigh  with  a  fresh 
north-easterly  breeze,  and  having  every  prospect  of  weather- 
ing Cape  de  Gat  without  difficulty  ;  but  on  the  5th,  when 
within  a  short  distance  of  the  desired  point,  we  encountered 
a  gale  from  the  west,  which  drove  us  back  between  thirty 
and  forty  miles  to  Aguillas,  which  we  reached  at  night. 
During  the  6th,  and  greater  part  of  the  7th,  it  blew  so 
strong  that  we  could  not  venture  from  our  shelter,  but  in 
the  evening  of  the  latter  day,  a  light  easterly  breeze  induced 
us  once  more  to  put  to  sea,  for  we  were  anxious  not  to  over- 
stay our  leave,  and  determined  to  make  every  effort  to 
double  the  troublesome  Cape.  Soon  after  we  sailed,  the 
wind  again  chopped  round  to  the  westward,  but  after  beat- 
ing till  the  morning  of  the  9th,  a  gale  from  the  east  sent  us 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  315 

past  the  Cape,  the  cutter  plunging  bows  under  on  meeting 
the  heavy  sea  caused  by  the  previous  westerly  breeze.  Our 
mast  being  sprung,  it  was  fished  with  one  of  the  sweeps, 
and  when  clear  of  the  land,  a  square  sail  was  hoisted,  and 
we  scudded  till  night,  when  the  weather  gradually  became 
cairn  ;  but,  owing  to  contrary  winds,  we  did  not  reach  Ma- 
laga till  the  night  of  the  llth.  Strong  westerly  gales  com- 
pelled us  to  remain  at  anchor  during  the  12th  and  13th, 
but  on  the  evening  of  the  14th  we  got  under  weigh  with  a 
light  easterly  breeze,  which  changed  to  the  west  ere  morn- 
ing, when  we  beat  up  for  the  anchorage  of  Fuengirola. 
Sailed  on  the  16th,  and  on  the  18th  of  July  we  rounded 
Europe  Point,  the  band  of  our  own  regiment  (at  drill  on 
the  Flats)  sounding  sweetly  far  above  us  in  the  morning 
air.  On  standing  out  into  the  bay,  a  gun  was  fired  to  draw 
attention  to  the  cutter,  and  anchoring  at  the  "  Old  Mole," 
about  eight  A.  M.,  we  recieved  pratique,  and  went  ashore  on 
the  twentieth  day  after  sailing  from  Barcelona.  Thus  ended 
the  "  cruise  of  the  Midge."  That  whilst  at  sea  we  were  in 
a  constant  state  of  watchfulness  and  sqme  little  anxiety, 
can  hardly  be  doubted.  But  we  were  young,  active  and 
light-hearted,  careless  of  the  present  and  reckless  of  the 
future.  Those  were  joyous  days,  to  which  memory  fondly 
recurs,  regarding  them  with  the  eye  of  retrospection  as  green 
oases  in  the  desert  of  life's  weary  pilgrimage. 


MR,  SNIGSBY'S   YACHT. 

BY  THE  AUTHOR  OP  "  SINGLETON  FONTENOY,"  ETC. 


CHAPTER    I. 

WELL,  my  dear,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  "what  do  you  pro- 
pose to  do  ?"  This  was  asked  with  the  sweetest  com- 
placency, for  Mr.  Snigsby  was  well  aware  that  his  wife  had 
no  possible  suggestion  to  make. 

"  I  think  we  must  just  stop  on  board — that's  all,"  said 
his  wife,  with  sharpness. 

"  Why  that,  my  dear,  seems  pretty  obvious.  I  am  in- 
formed that  in  trespassing  on  shore  when  in  quarantine,  you 
are  liable  to  be  shot." 

"  I  wish  I  was,"  ejaculated  Alfred,  gloomily. 

Mr.  Snigsby  paced  the  deck  with  his  hands  in  his  pockets, 
jingling  his  loose  cash,  according  to  custom.  The  yacht 
was  moored  at  a  buoy,  not  very  far  from  the  Parlatorio. 
That  establishment  will  be  long  remembered  hy  all  who 
have  been  in  quarantine  in  Malta.  The  tabooed  human 
beings  lean  against  a  bar — a  quarantine  officer  marches  in 
the  centre — on  the  other  side  mankind  at  large  are  permit- 
ted to  hold  converse  with  you.  If  you  want  refreshments, 
as  of  course  you  do,  you  pop  the  money  into  a  little  tub  of 
water  held  to  you  for  the  purpose.  It  was  a  great  specta- 
cle to  see  the  Snigsbys  lounging  about  there  in  the  morn- 
ings, or  playing  quoits  in  the  quarantine  ground.  To  be 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  31? 

sure  it  was  preposterously  hot,  but  at  it  father  and  son 
regularly  went,  while  Mrs.  Snigsby  stood  by  and  watched 
them. 

Meanwhile,  Mr.  Blobb  the  skipper's  frame  of  mind  was 
something  which  induced  him  to  compare  himself — and 
surely  he  knew  best — to  "  a  bear  with  a  sore  head."  This 
is  a  favorite  illustration  among  nautical  men.  He  slept  a 
good  deal,  and  also  swore  a  little,  and  continually  com- 
plained of  the  heat.  No  wonder — Mr.  Snigsby's  bottled 
stout  kept  bursting  faster  than  ever,  from  that  very  cause. 
It  happened,  as  might  have  been  expected,  about  the  hot- 
test time  of  the  day — and,  as  has  previously  been  hinted, 
usually  about  the  hour  of  BlobVs  lunch.  Mr.  Snigsby  had 
his  misgivings,  but  he  was  considerably  in  awe  of  the  skip- 
per. That  awe  had  gradually  increased  during  the  voyage  ; 
for  Mr.  Blobb,  having  very  soon  discovered  that  they  "was 
not  regular  swells,"  had  taken  measures  for  making  himself 
of  immense  importance  on  board.  He  was  an  old  yachts- 
man, and  had  sailed  under  most  specimens  of  the  yachting 
tribe — in  the  Sylph,  for  instance,  with  a  sturdy  old  yacht- 
ing dowager,  who  was  a  better  sailor  than  many  post  cap- 
tains— who  would  ring  her  bell  in  the  night  to  know  why 
the  gaff-topsail  was  not  taken  off  her,  (the  yacht  I  mean,) 
and  who  always  made  Blobb  pay  for  tha  spars  he  lost. 
His  cruise  with  that  "  old  woman  of  the  sea"  (who  would 
have  made  a  good  wife  for  the  famous  persecutor  of  Sinbad) 
dwelt  in  his  memory  long.  She  was  the  widow  of  Admiral 
Slumton,  K.K.B.,  and  had  lived  many  a  year  on  board  her 
Majesty's  ships  and  vessels  of  war,  pleasantly  enjoying  the 
cream  of  naval  life  on  the  various  stations  where  Slumton 
had  had  commands.  Blobb  suffered  terribly  on  board  her 
vessel,  and  finally  had  a  desperate  quarrel  with  her — having 
lost  overboard  her  wig,  which  she  had  sent  on  deck  to  be 
dressed  by  her  very  ugly  domestic.  Then  he  had  sailed  the 


318  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

Whelp  for  a  young  gentleman  who  took  it  into  his  head  to 
take  all  the  charge  on  himself,  and  superseded  Blobb,  till  they 
were  caught  in  the  Gulf  of  Lyons  by  a  tremendous  gale, 
and  the  young  gentleman  was  found  on  his  knees  in  among 
his  patent  leather  boots.  Accordingly,  he  was  a  regular 
old  stager,  and  often,  when  the  Snigsbys  sat  down  to  a 
more  delicate  fowl  than  usual,  the  villain  would  set  the  big 
jib — as  he  expressed  it — with  motives  so  disgraceful  that  I 
decline  to  expatiate  on  them.  A  pretty  thing  indeed — 
fowls  to  dinner — to  a  person  of  his  station  of  life  !  Such 
was  the  reflection  of  Mrs.  Snigsby  to  her  husband  one  day 
after  Blobb  had  requested  permission  to  kill  a  couple  of 
chickens — for,  of  course,  the  Snigsbys  now  felt  inclined  to 
look  down  on  the  "  lower  orders."  Everybody  who  rises  in 
this  country  cuts  and  snubs  the  class  he  came  from.  We 
are  all  seemingly  becoming  "  higher  orders"  together,  so 
that  by  and  by,  society  will  be  like  the  giant's  castle,  built 
on  the  Jop  of  a  bean-stalk — a  structure  that  must,  of  course, 
get  more  shaky  the  loftier  and  more  pretentous  it  becomes. 
Well,  days  wore  on,  and  the  quarantine  people  gave  the 
yacht  some  grace,  and  allowed  them  to  haul  down  the  yel- 
low flag  before  the  time.  The  fact  was,  this  was  suggested 
to  the  authorities  by  little  Grigg,  the  busybody  of  the  island, 
who  discovered,  with  considerable  tact,  that  the  Snigsbys 
were  people  with  money,  and  took  care  to  be  introduced, 
and  to  let  them  know  to  whose  interference  they  owed  their 
premature  escape.  The  family  now  established  themselves  in 
very  nice  rooms  in  StradaKeale, — that  imposing  street  where 
the  pavement  looks  so  white  and  hot  in  the  summer — where 
the  Maltese  girls  go  tripping  along  with  their  mantillas  flow- 
ing— and  his  Excellency  the  Cardinal  rolls  by  in  a  hideously 
ugly  carriage — and  military  men  saunter,  and  naval  men 
walk,  and  Turks  stroll,  and  priests  glide  monotonously  in  a 
pace  different  from  all.  Malta  is  the  great  olla  podrida  of 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  319 

taankind.  All  varieties  of  races  get  mixed  in  that  dish 
Some  ingenuity  would  be  required  to  determine  the  propor- 
tions of  the  social  mess  ; — but  the  English  mercantile  classes 
represent  the  beef — wandering  artists  the  more  tender  and 
luxuriant  fowl — naval  and  military  men  the  game,  (a  little 
high,  sometimes,) — the  natives  the  malodorous  garlic — and 
Jesuits  the  titillating  pepper  I  On  the  whole  it  is  an  agree- 
able compound — if  your  appetite  is  vigorous. 

The  Snigsbys,  I  say,  perched  themselves  comfortably  in 
Strada  Reale,  and  there  they  looked  round  about,  and  then 
at  each  other  in  an  inquiring  way.  They  were  now  abroad, 
there  could  be  no  doubt  of  that,  and — why,  now  they  must 
begin  to  enjoy  it.  But  the  first  stare  some  English  people 
give  under  these  simple  circumstances  is  odd  enough  ;  they 
seem  to  peer  round  with  a  sort  of  idea  that  they  ought 
to  be  somehow  or  other  inspired.  There  is  a  disagreeable 
air  of  "  Is  this  all  1"  about  them,  made  still  more  ludicrous 
by  their  assumption  of  a  contrary  style  of  language.  How 
often  must  we  preach  the  codum  non  animuml  My  dear 
Mr.  Snigsby,  how  could  you  expect  to  be  touched  by  the 
tombs  of  the  Knights  of  St.  John's,  when  nothing  but  your 
pocket  (on  the  demand  of  6d.)  was  ever  touched  by  the 
tombs  in  your  own  Westminster  Abbey?  However,  they 
began  at  all  events  to  get  into  "  society  "  in  time.  For  to 
begin  with,  they  secured  the  good  graces  of  the  little  fat 
pompous  parson  of  St.  Kilderkin.  The  card  of  the  Rever- 
end Mr.  Fatton  was  sent  up  one  morning,  and  the  reverend 
gentleman  himself  followed  it,  bowed,  took  a  chair,  crossed 
his  legs,  and  holding  his  hat  on  his  knees,  kept  himself  with 
one  eye  on  Mr.  and  one  on  Mrs.  Snigsby,  so  as  to  secure 
both,  while  "  My  son,  sir,"  Alfred,  sat  uneasily  on  the  sofa, 
fumbling  the  "  Racing  Calendar."  Mr.  Fatton's  business 
was  ushered  in  by  a  "  hem,"  and  "  doubtless  Mr.  Snigsby 
was  acquainted  with  the  depressed  state  of  the  Protestant 


320  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OB, 

Church  in  the  island  ?"  Our  friend  had  certainly  never  be*- 
come  acquainted  with  anything  of  the  sort,  and  glancing 
with  the  eye  of  a  man  of  business  at  the  prosperous  appear- 
ance of  Mr.  Fat  ton,  could  not  at  first  imagine  the  possibility 
of  it.  But  he  felt  he  was  very  likely  to  expose  his  igno- 
rance if  he  demurred,  so  he  bowed  blandly  and  rubbed  his 
hands  with  an  air  of  acquiescence,  Mr.  Fatton  bowed  also, 
and  went  on  to  talk  of  the  *'  abomination  of  desolation," 
and  the  machinations  of  the  Jesuits,  and,  in  fact,  the  sub- 
scription list  far  the  new  Protestant  Church  of  Malta,  now 
being  built  on  the  "  Rock  of  Ages,"  as  he  expressed  it,  and 
at  a  considerable  expense.  (Indeed,  Malta  had  recently 
been  blessed  with  a  bishop  who  had  been  received  with 
"  manned  yards/7  and  a  salute — with  considerably  more 
honor  indeed  than  St.  Paul  was  in  the  same  island.)  Mr. 
Snigsby  heard  the  orator  with  attention,  glanced  at  his 
wife,  went  to  his  desk  and  subscribed  with  munificence.  Mr. 
Fatten  was  charmed,  begged  to  make  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Snigsby 
acquainted  with  some  of  his  friends.  Cards  dropped  in,  and 
the  Snigsbys  went  out  a  good  deal,  and  attended  the  fashion- 
able movements  ;  saw  the  sailors  landed  to  drill  in  the  morn- 
ings, which  was  a  freak  of  the  new  admiral's,  which  gave  a 
few  gentlemen  in  the  squadron  an  opportunity  of  galloping 
about  like  dragoons ;  attended  Florian  gardens,  and  "  stopped 
the  way "  at  the  opera  in  the  evening.  Then,  there  were 
quiet  solid  dinners,  at  which  Mr.  Snigsby  chatted  over  the 
"  currency  "  with  mercantile  men,  the  reduction  of  the  dol- 
lar, the  rise  of  the  dollar,  and  so  forth — for  Malta  is  a  mini- 
ature England  in  business  as  in  pleasure,  has  its  own  cur- 
rency, and  gets  into  commercial  convulsions  about  two  pence. 
So,  the  Snigsbaean  existence  went  on  very  pleasantly  for  a 
while,  scarcely  jarred  even  by  the  singular  conduct  of  a  pri- 
vate in  the  Tralee  Raffs,  who,  being  comfortably  drunk,  and 
seeing  Mr.  Snigsby's  door  open,  tumbled  up  stairs  unper- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  321 

ceived,  and  coolly  turned  into  bed  in  the  connubial  chamber. 
That  misguided  man  was  discovered  by  the  astonished  Mr. 
Snigsby,  in  the  evening,  and  subsequently  duly  punished. 

One  regrets  to  reflect,  however,  that  all  this  time  Mr. 
Alfred  Snigsby  was  finding  things  very  "  slow."  How 
could  he  be  expected  to  relish  the  discussions  on  the  "  cur- 
rency " — a  word  which  simply  suggested  laughter  to  a  dis- 
ciple of  the  school  of  Brickies.  He  had  come  out  to  the 
Mediterranean  with  the  feeling  of  those  who,  as  Punch  said 
the  other  day,  think  "  the  Mediterranean  is  not  to  be  made 
a  French  lake — its  proper  vocation  being  that  of  English 
pond."  He  thought  all  enthusiasm  about  antiquities,  and 
so  forth,  "humbug."  Indeed  Brickies,  his  idol,  had  tra- 
velled, and  published  a  work,  pooh-poohing  the  Pyramids, 
and  snubbing  the  Acropolis,  and  conveying  much  such  a 
notion  of  the  East  as  one  would  be  likely  to  get  of  the 
North  from  an  alert  inmate  of  that  department  of  the 
Zoological  Gardens  where  the  Simia3  dwelt.  Alfred  had, 
accordingly,  no  sympathy  with  anything  but  such  amuse- 
ment as  the  island  could  afford  to  a  man  of  London  tastes  ; 
and  all  such  people  must  have  remarked  how  miserably  infe- 
rior foreigners  are  to  us  in  civilization.  You  may  range 
Constantinople  or  Smyrna  for  nights  without  ever  finding  a 
place  where  you  can  get  a  chop  and  hear  a  "  comic  song ;" 
at  Athens,  a  friend  of  mine  "  out  on  the  loose"  at  night, 
was  nearly  eaten  alive  by  the  dogs  that  howl  dismally  there. 
It  was  melancholy  to  see  Alfred  "  mooning,"  as  he  called  it, 
about  the  streets  in  the  forenoon,  sometimes  peering  in  at 
the  churches,  and  then  slinking  away  "  bored,"  afraid  to  go 
home,  lest  Mr.  Fatton  should  be  prosing  there,  and  sick  of 
the  yacht,  which  was  lying,  looking  trim  and  empty,  near 
the  Dockyard  Creek.  Blobb's  conversation  (even  had  Mrs. 
Snigsby  not  warned  her  son  against  being  too  familiar  with 
his  inferiors)  was  somewhat  monotonous,  and  Blobb  now 

14* 


322  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

usually  spent  great  part  of  the  day  in  playing  skittles  at  a 
homely  pastoral  public-house  called  the  "  Shepherd  and 
Shepherdess,"  on  the  Burmola  side  of  the  harbor.  Alfred, 
in  a  word,  was  hipped. 

But  fortune  had  something  in  store  for  the  youth, — an 
excitement  for  that  noble  heart  and  brain.  One  morning 
he  had  just  "  toiled"  (the  reader  must  pardon  one  more  of 
his  expressions)  out  to  saunter  as  usual,  when  he  saw  in  the 
distance  a  lady,  at  the  sight  of  whom  he  involuntarily  plucked 
up  his  collar,  and  thought  of  his  studs.  She  was,  as  re- 
garded looks,  apparently  too  dark  for  an  English  woman, 
and  too  light  for  a  Southern  ;  she  walked  with  an  easy,  per- 
fectly self-possessed  manner,  looking  in  at  the  shop  windows 
every  now  and  then.  Mr.  Alfred  involuntarily  exclaimed 
to  himself — (for  there  is  such  a  process,  though  I  agree 
with  Theodore  Hook  in  thinking  "mentally  ejaculated" 
ridiculous,)  "What  a  stunner  I"  He  carelessly  crossed  the 
street  and  strutted  after  her.  She  paused  at  a  shop. 
Alfred  paused.  She  glanced  towards  him,  and  met  his  eye. 
Hers  was  a  clear  straight  look,  not  likely  to  be  startled  by 
the  amount  of  expression  which  nature  had  bestowed  on 
Alfred's,  but  he  fancied  he  saw  something  encouraging  in  it. 
Accordingly,  he  followed  her  once  more,  saw  her  turn  down 
one  of  the  streets  leading  from  Strada  Reale  in  the  direc- 
tion of  the  Quarantine  Harbor,  and  enter  a  house.  We 
may  be  sure  he  booked  the  number.  I  suppose  all  men 
have  experienced  what  a  relief  anything  in  the  shape  of  au 
attachment  is,  if  one  is  at  one's  wit's  end  for  something  to 
do  ;  really  it  is  quite  a  luxury,  if  one  has  something  to  think 
about,  but  Alfred  in  this  case  was  transported..  Here  was 
a  chance  for  him  at  last.  He  felt  that  he  might  do  some- 
thing now  really  "  fast."  Should  she  only  be  the  new  singer 
expected  at  the  Opera !  Your  gentlemen  of  the  Brickies 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  323 

and  Alfred  Snigsby  school,  we  may  remark,  have  always 
the  most  extraordinary  interest  in  theatrical  women  in  pre- 
ference to  others.  They  are  moths  that  will  hover  round 
the  foot-lights.  This  is  vice,  doubtless  ;  but  it  is  a  pitiable 
vice  that  has  a  dash  of  snobbery  in  it.  A  few  names  that 
disgrace  the  aristocracy,  are  associated  with  a  few  names 
that  disgrace  the  stage.  Now,  Brickies  &  Co. — like  Trip 
in  the  School  for  Scandal,  their  type — must  imitate  their 
superiors'  vice.  Hence  their  follies  and  their  intrigues. 
Our  friend  Alfred,  for  instance,  when  in  London,  would 
have  made  as  much  hubbub  about  a  little  pug-nosed  girl — 
in  the  Covent  Garden  ballet — as  if  she  had  been  a  Font- 
anges.  But  to  return.  He  loitered  about  the  house  in  the 
Strada  Sotta,  glancing  at  the  windows — saw  the  lady  ap- 
pear at  one — looked  up — met  her  look  again.  There  were 
no  signs  of  anybody  else  about  the  establishment.  It  was 
a  dull,  quiet  street,  a  long  narrow  one,  at  the  end  of  which 
the  water  gleamed  in  a  patch,  as  if  seen  through  a  tele- 
scope. He  moved  away  presently,  and  went  home,  where 
he  was  sadly  distrait  during  dinner-time.  His  father  essayed 
to  brighten  him  up,  by  asking  him  what  curiosities  of  the 
island  he  had  yet  visited — for  Mr.  Snigsby,  though  sadly 
bored  by  "  interesting"  remains,  faithfully  visited  them,  and 
Mrs.  Snigsby  went  further,  and  earnestly  tried  to  like  them, 
though  both  of  them  affected  an  edifying  indifference  to  the 
splendors  of  the  " idolatrous"  churches.  Alfred  had  little  to 
say.  That  same  evening  he  sought  the  enchanted  street 
again  ;  the  lady  was  seated  at  the  same  window,  which  was 
half  open,  to  let  in  the  cool  air  during  that  delicious  Medi- 
terranean hour  when  the  weight  of  the  heat  being  lifted  off 
the  earth,  all  the  freshness  and  the  sweetness  rise  up  every- 
where, like  perfume  from  a  vase  of  rose-leaves  when  the  lid 
is  removed.  Alfred  sauntered  past,  mildly  humming  an 


324  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

operatic  reminiscence.  The  figure  moved,  and  what  was  his 
delight  when  he  heard  a  piano,  and  a  rich  brilliant  voice 
begin ! 

Days  passed,  and  to  the  best  of  Alfred's  belief,  he  was  a 
favored  man.  At  last  it  struck  him,  that  he  would  make 
an  experiment,  which,  if  successful,  would  rank  him  among 
the  most  accomplished  men  of  his  school.  The  magic  win- 
dow was  open,  apparently,  so  late ;  it  was  not  very  high. 
Other  figures,  than  that  of  the  beauty,  he  had  never  seen 
there.  The  street  was  silence  itself.  What  a  fine  thing  it 
would  be  to  scale  the  window  by  a  ladder  1  He  had  seen 
Miss  Deloraine  (nee  Snogg)  do  it,  in  blue  silk  trousers  and 
a  doublet,  in  Brickies7  burlesque  of  Jonah's  Gourd;  or  Cut 
and  Come  Again.  It  would  be  tedious  to  narrate  all  his 
musings  on  this  project.  He  made  up  his  mind  to  try  it, 
and  having,  by  a  judicious  use  of  cash,  procured  two  faith- 
ful Maltese,  who  were  to  bring  a  ladder  at  eleven  P.  M.,  or 
so,  to  the  neighboring  corner,  he  fixed  his  evening,  and 
awaited  the  hour.  About  nine  he  rose  from  the  sofa,  where 
he  had  been  affecting  to  doze  after  dinner. 

"  Where  are  you  going,  Alf.  V  said  his  mamma. 

"  Just  for  a  walk  in  the  cool.  It  is  too  hot  here.  Good 
night." 

He  gained  the  street,  and  marched  along — just  a  little 
cold  about  the  heart,  as  if  there  was  an  ice-poultice  there, 
drawing  the  "pluck"  away  from  it.  It  was  not  his  time 
yet,  (but  how  could  he  have  gone  out  with  propriety  much 
later?)  and  so  he  turned  into  a  cafe.  In  the  billiard-room 
there,  a  company  of  seedy,  bearded  individuals  were  play- 
ing the  Russian  game.  He  sat  on  the  benches  at  the  side, 
drinking  negus  and  watching  them  ;  there  was  a  novelty  in 
the  color  of  the  balls  and  the  mode  of  play  which  interested 
him  ;  and  then,  you  know,  to  be  up  to  the  Russian  game 
would  look  very  well,  by  and  by,  at  Pott's  billiard-rooms. 


•FuN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          325 

in  the  Strand.  He  finished  the  negus  ;  he  took  some  brandy 
and  water ;  he  began  to  feel  rather  like  a  Lovelace,  and  to 
be  somewhat  proud  of  his  meditated  exploit.  He  sallied 
forth — though  to  be  sure  he  had  a  little  qualm,  partly  fear, 
partly  something  else,  as  having  to  pass  the  family  lodgings 
he  saw  a  light  in  his  mother's  bed-room,  where,  I  suppose, 
Mrs.  Snigsby  was  putting  on  her  night-cap  before  the  look- 
ing glass.  This  emotion,  however,  was  very  temporary.  On 
he  went.  He  passed  one  cafe,  just  closing,  and  could  not 
resist  a  final  little  dose  of  brandy.  At  last  he  was  in  the 
street.  The  window  was  open  ;  there  was  a  faint  light  in 
the  room.  He  found  his  ladder  in  its  place.  He  thought 
for  an  instant  of  everything  that  had  encouraged  him  to  his 
resolution,  and  slowly  moved  the  instrument — a  decently 
light  one — from  the  ground.  At  the  very  first  start  he 
nearly  jun  it  through  a  parlor  window,  but  he  moved  with 
more  caution.  A  moment,  and  it  was  in  its  destined  place. 
His  foot  was  on  the  lowest  step. 

At  this  moment  who  should  arrive  at  the  end  of  the 
street  but  the  "Infant  Phenomenon,"  Mr.  Herbert  Flower, 
of  the  "  Intolerable  !"  He  was  accompanied  by  an  ac- 
quaintance, Yelourby,  of  the  "  Bustard  1"  These  two 
young  gentlemen,  after  having  been  riding  out  all  the 
afternoon,  had  been  dining  at  the  Clarendon,  had  played 
billiards,  and  supped  on  quails,  and  were  now  open  to  any 
amusement  that  anybody  might  have  to  offer  them.  Flow- 
er's eye  caught  the  ladder  in  an  instant. 

"  I  say,  Yelourby,  look  there  !  Stop  a  minute,  the  fel- 
low's getting  up.  Let  us  stick  at  the  corner  and  watch  I" 

Alfred  mounted — his  long  legs  looking  ludicrous  enough — 
and  commenced  the  ascent.  When  he  reached  the  window 
there  was  nobody  in  the  room.  He  felt  very  like  a  burglar. 
However,  he  quietly  got  in.  There  was  a  small  lamp  burn- 
ing on  the  table,  and  near  it  lay  a  sheet  of  music. 


326  .    SWELL   LIFE  AT  SEA;   OR, 

But  by  this  time  Mr.  Flower  had  reached  the  spot. 
"  Gad,"  he  said  to  Yelourby,  "  here's  a  lark." 

"  Let's  take  away  the  ladder,"  said  Yelourby,  "  and  he 
won't  be  able  to  get  down  again." 

Flower  laughed,  but  the  ladder  looked  quite  tempting, 
and  he  immediately  began  ascending  it  himself.  Mr.  Al- 
fred's astonishment  was  immense  when  his  head  appeared  at 
the  open  window.  Open  flew  the  door,  however,  and  in 
rushed  a  stout  old  gentleman  armed  with  a  large  stick,  and 
followed  by  two  or  three  servants.  Alfred  involuntarily 
assumed  the  attitude  of  the  Chelsea  Snob.  The  old  gen- 
tleman flew  towards  the  window,  catching  Mr.  Flower  just 
within  a  step  or  two  of  the  top. 

"  Good  evening,  sir,"  said  Mr.  Flower,  taking  off  his  hat 
with  immense  coolness.  "  You  seem  to  keep  open  house  !" 

Two  servants  rushed  at  Alfred,  who  gave  the  first  of 
them  what  he  subsequently  described  as  "  a  mouse  under 
the  left  eye."  The  stick  wildly  flourished  over  the  "  Phe- 
nomenon," but  he  ran  down  two  steps,  turned  inside  the 
ladder,  and  came  down  "  hand  over  hand."  The  police 
were  beginning  to  assemble,  and  the  "  Phenomenon"  and  his 
friend  disappeared.  But  Mr.  Alfred,  after  prodigies  of 
valor,  was  taken  prisoner,  and  locked  up. 

"  His  mother  looked  from  her  lattice  high" 

in  vain  for  him  the  next  morning,  but  Mr.  Snigsby  was 
summoned  by  a  forlorn  note  to  the  Court,  and  purchased 
the  youth's  freedom  on  payment  of  a  fine. 

Mrs.  Snigsby  did  not  quite  understand  the  affair.  "  Fun 
is  fun,  my  dear  boy,"  said  the  excellent  woman,  "  but  what 
did  you  expect  to  find  in  the  house  ?" 

Alfred  looked  foolish.  Mr.  Snigsby  pulled  up  his  neck- 
cloth with  a  significant  "hem."  "My  dear,"  he  said,  "let 
us  be  very  glad  that  the  afifair  is  settled  as  it  is." 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          327 

"Yes,  but  it  seems  so  odd,  such  a  strange  kind  of 
whim  -  " 


"  My  dear,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  "your  innocent  mind 


Mrs.  Snigsby  felt  that  there  was  patronage  in  the  tone 
of  the  observation.  "  Innocent  !  Mr.  Snigsby  ;  I  don't 
know  that  I'm  more  innocent  than  my  neighbors,  and  -  " 

Her  husband  gave  a  hearty  city  laugh.  "  Neither, 
madam,  is  your  son  and  heir  1"  And  Snigsby,  for  once, 
had  the  best  of  it. 


CHAPTER     II. 

ALFRED  in  his  agitation  had  not  recognised  Herbert 
Flower  as  the  young  gentleman  to  whose  hoax  the  yacht 
owed  her  quarantine.  Herbert  Flower  had  recognised  him, 
however,  for  that  officer  was  not  likely  to  be  disturbed  in 
his  vision  by  circumstances  of  danger.  In  fact,  he  was  a 
fellow  of  great  pluck,  and  had  distinguished  himself  on  the 
coast,  from  no  wish  to  distinguish  himself  to  be  sure,  but 
there  was  a  sort  of  excitement  about  capturing  slavers, 
which  he  rather  liked.  When  he  returned,  he  had  taken 
lodgings  in  London,  drawn  his  prize  money,  and  started  a 
brougham.  It  is  supposed  that  he  meant  to  go  down  to 
the  parental  abode  in  the  country  by-and-by,  but  his  father 
visited  London  in  the  interim,  and  found  out  his  where- 
abouts in  the  oddest  manner.  The  old  gentleman  was  re- 
turning to  his  hotel  from  the  theatre,  when  he  passed 
through  a  street  apparently  in  a  high  state  of  animation. 
A  building  flaring  with  lamps,  and  from  which  the  wild 
clamor  of  a  polka  resounded,  was  the  focus  of  attraction. 
Among  many  cabs  was  a  small  row  of  broughams,  with 
their  drivers  nodding  on  the  boxes,  and  one  old  yellow 
family  carriage,  which  some  youth  had  disgracefully  brought 
while  the  family  were  out  of  town,  and  which  stood  there  a 


328  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA  ;    OR, 

forlorn  protest  of  respectability  against  the  surrounding 
scene.  Mr.  Flower  was  somewhat  hustled  and  almost 
pushed  against  the  broughams,  when  his  eye  caught,  on 
decidedly  the  newest  of  them,  a  well-known  symbol.  He 
gazed  on  the  panels  and  saw  nothing  more  nor  less  than  a 
shield,  argent,  semee  of  roses  barbed  and  seeded,  ppr :  crest,  a 
lion  sejant,  holding  in  its  mouth  a  fleur-de-lis  motto,  Olet,  ut 
sold.  Mr.  Flower  well  knew  that  no  one  dared  assume  that 
brilliant  coat  but  a  Flower  of  Flory.  He  woke  the  coach- 
man, who  answered  to  his  question  that  his  master's  name 
was  Mr.  Herbert  Flower.  The  youth  appeared  shortly 
afterwards,  delighted  to  see  him,  of  course,  and  next  day 
was  taken  down  to  the  country  in  triumph.  Mr.  Flower 
has  since  learned  that  the  place  was  called  the  Casino,  but 
has  not  yet  been  able  to  find  the  word  in  any  dictionary. 
Is  it  generally  known,  I  wonder? 

A  few  days  after  Alfred's  adventure  in  Strada  Sotta,  he 
was  strutting  out,  keeping  very  clear  of  the  scene  of  the 
ladder  feat,  when  he  entered  a  billiard-room.  The  usual 
party  were  playing  pool  there  ;  the  Italian  count  with  the 
white  beard,  that  fine  old  man,  with  a  bevy  of  youngsters 
round  him  (a  scene  which  my  friend  Fontenoy  used  to  say 
could  be  excellently  described  by  one  line  from  Don  Juan  : 

"  A  band  of  children  round  an  aged  ram !") 

a  mate  or  two,  and  Ludder  of  the  Marines.  Poor  Ludder  ! 
To  be  without  fortune  and  to  be  unable  to  live  without  lux- 
uries— to  make  billiards  help  one's  poverty,  and  games  of 
amusement  pay  one's  washerwoman — to  be  sneered  at  by  men 
who  never  note  any  want  in  a  man  but  a  want  of  money — 
to  have  a  dubious  civility  from  the  very  marker,  who  has 
heard  the  whispers  of  the  smokers,  and  esteems  the  poor 
gentleman,  who  plays  so  well,  as  little  beter  than  himself ! — 
what  a  destiny  yours  was  !  There  are  no  tragedies  like 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  329 

those  of  civilization  ;  no  lot  so  bitter  as  to  have  to  make 
both  ends  meet,  by  helping  them  with  a  little  bit  of  the 
heartstrings. 

There  Ludder  was,  as  usual,  with  his  pale,  half-anxious 
face,  as  Alfred  came  in,  just  resting  the  cue.  Click.  A 
"  life  "  is  gone.  Jenner  bites  his  lips  ;  he  had  lost  at  several 
successive  games. 

"  Oh,  I  can't  do  anything,"  he  muttered,  looking  sulky. 

"  Why  play,  then  ?"  said  Ludder,  quietly. 

"  Why  do  you  ?"  asked  Jenner,  with  a  sneer. 

Ludder  looked  up  for  a  moment,  but  his  face  was  calm  ; 
he  chalked  his  cue,  and  hummed.  The  markers  exchanged 
glances — the  game  went  on  quietly.  Both  Alfred  and  Her- 
bert Flower,  who  was  sitting  on  the  side  sofa,  watching  the 
tables,  with  a  cigar  in  his  mouth,  looked  up  at  the  same  mo- 
ment. Their  eyes  met ;  Alfred  began  to  recognise  him 
slowly,  but  Flower  had  heard  rumors  of  the  Snigsbssan  hos- 
pitality. He  went  over  to  Alfred  at  once,  and  said  : 

"  I  made  a  sad  mistake,  t'other  day,  about  that  brigan- 
tine  !  Hem, — you  see,  the  fact  is,  these  brigantines  are 
the  devil !" 

Alfred  had  all  a  "  knowing  "  man's  misgivings  that  he  was 
being  humbugged,  but  there  was  a  good-natured  look  in 
Flower's  face,  and  Flower  was  a  naval  man,  and  Alfred 
wanted  to  know  naval  men,  and  military  men  ;  Brickies 
himself  had  a  turn  that  way,  and  sang  funny  songs,  and  told 
anecdotes  at  the  Guards'  mess,  and  took  a  vacant  seat  in  a 
drag,  when  they  asked  him,  &c. — so  he  accepted  Herbert's 
overtures  with  civility,  and  Herbert  took  him  off  to  Joe 
Micallef  s  to  supper,  and  introduced  him,  as  "  my-  friend 
Snigsby,"  to  a  few  other  luminaries. 

There  they  sat  and  "  chaffed'-7  the  fat  and  jovial  Joe,  and 
made  him  cook  some  quails,  and  soon  got  very  friendly. 
Alfred  asked  three  of  them  to  dinner,  and  they  came  very 


330  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

punctually  indeed,  and  were  very  splendidly  entertained. 
Mr.  Snigsby  even  apologized  for  his  uncourteousness  on  the 
occasion  of  Mr.  Flower's  official  visit,  and  Flower  begged 
him  not  to  mention  it — with  perfect  sincerity,  for  the  fact 
was  he  dreaded  bursting  into  a  roar  of  laughter  at  the 
thought  of  his  subsequent  exploits,  which  had  raised  him 
amongst  the  youngsters  of  the  squadron  to  the  highest  point 
of  popularity. 

All  this  was  very  agreeable.  Alfred  came  on  board  the 
"  Intolerable  n  very  frequently.  They  used  to  retire  after 
dinner  to  the  bow-port  on  the  main  deck,  and  smoke  there. 
One  evening,  a  thought  struck  Alfred, — "  Would  they 
come  and  breakfast  with  him  next  morning  on  board  the 
'  Paragon  ?'  "  "  Of  course  they  would — of  course.  Noth- 
ing could  be  more  agreeable,  if  old would  give  leave." 

"  Old has  been  sulky  lately,"  a  midshipman  remarks  ; 

"  fact  is,  we  don't  come  up  to  see  the  hammocks  stowed, 

you  know.'7     "  What  kind  of  a  man  is  old ?"  Alfred 

asks.  "  Oh  !  an  old  muff."  "  Is  he  anything  of  a  sailor?" 
asks  Alfred,  looking  nautical.  "  Why — hem  !  he  may  be 
something  of  a  sailor,  it's  true,"  says  Flower,  lazily  assent- 
ing to  what  he  considered  an  unimportant  merit.  "  How- 
ever, old must  be  asked  for  leave,  sailor  or  no  sailor." 

"  You  must  put  up  with  these  things  if  you  stay  in  the  pro- 
fession," says  Jigger,  philosophically.  They  make  up  their 
minds  to  ask  him  at  once,  for  he  is  just  at  dessert  now,  and, 
to  use  his  own  favorite  expression,  "  a  child  might  play  with 
him  now  !"  Lo  !  off  goes  Flower  to  the  ward  room,  steals 

alongside  the  said  old ,  and  asks  him,  just  as  he  has 

taken  a  sip  of  his  favorite  wine — for  Flower  is  an  artist  in 
these  matters — manages  a  commander  as  Womb  well  would 

a  bear.  Out  he  comes  again,  looking  joyous.  Old is  not 

such  a  bad  fellow  after  all.     "  That's  it  !  you  see,"  adds 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  331 

Jigger,  "  he's  not  without  his  good  points,  Snigsby,  mind 
you."  And  they  arranged  to  meet  next  morning. 

Morning  came.  Flower  and  Jigger  had  vanished  early, 

for  old might  be  bilious,  and  repent.  "  Too  knowing 

to  risk  that,  you  see/'  says  Jigger.  Alfred  felt  a  justifiable 
pride  as  he  showed  them  into  the  main  cabin,  with  splendid 
furniture  and  hangings  everywhere,  breakfast  laid  out,  game, 
fruit,  wine,  &c.,  on  a  table  radiant  with  silver  and  china. 
"  These  people  do  it,"  thought  Flower,  and  Flower  wondered 
mentally  "  what  things  were  coming  to."  Flory  itself  was 
a  little  seedy  now-a-days,  and  his  second  sister  had  married 
somebody  for  money — somebody,  alas  !  who  had  been 
obliged  to  get  a  grant  of  arms  at  old  Flower's  request,  or 
she  could  not  have  transmitted  their  twenty-four  quarterings 
to  her  children,  in  case  Herbert  (who  was  the  only  son) 
left  his  sisters  co-heiresses  of  the  name.  Whereas — but, 
"  Coffee  or  tea,  Flower?"  broke  the  moment's  reverie.  I 
don't  say  Flower  was  envious  of  the  wealthy  broker  ;  I  said 
he  had  had  an  English  education  and  thought  accordingly. 

But  a  case  of  preserved  grouse  had  been  ripped  with  the 
sharp  steel  in  a  moment ;  in  another,  Jigger  had  helped 
everybody  to  Moselle,  as  an  excuse  for  beginning  himself, 
and  the  party  began  to  get  jolly. 

"  Call  Blobb,"  said  Flower.  Blobb  came  down.  Flower 
poured  out  a  glass  of  wine  for  him.  The  tall  skipper  said 
"  my  respects,"  as  his  custom  was,  and  drank  it. 

"  And  now,"  said  Flower,  slapping  Alfred  on  the  back, 
"  let's  run  outside  the  harbor  for  an  hour." 

Alfred  hesitated.     Blobb  looked  at  him  inquiringly. 

"  There's  a  goodish  breeze,"  said  Blobb.  "  I  should  let 
these  gentlemen  see  what  the  Paragon  can  do,  sir — (Alfred 
knew  one  thing,  that  the  Paragon  could  do  for  him  in  rough 
weather  only  too  well) — When  I  sailed  the  Dream  for  Lord 
Blory " 


332  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;   OK, 

"  She  won  the  Cup,"  said  Flower. 

"  So  she  did,  sir.  Do  you  remember  that  ?  That  was 
a  wessel  I  Well,  shall  I  weigh,  sir  ?" 

"  Til  bet  you  the  Lotos  would  lick  you  all  to  fits,"  said 
Jigger,  to  stimulate  affairs. 

"There  ain't  a  vessel  in  the  squadron  as  can  touch  us/' 
said  Mr.  Blobb. 

"We'll  show  them,  eh,  Blobb?"  said  Alfred,  with  des- 
perate gaiety.  "  Get  up  the  anchor."  He  felt  that  he 
was  in  for  it — now  or  never  must  Alfred  Snigsby  be  a 
nautical  man  1  "Try  a  pate!"  he  said,  with  a  magnificent 
air,  and  he  further  dived  into  the  recesses  of  the  yacht's 
resources  by  producing  some  curafoa.  If  Herbert  Flower 
had  a  weakness,  (and  it  must  be  admitted  he  had  a  few,) 
his  peculiar  weakness  was  curafoa.  They  pledged  each  other 
with  all  conceivable  jollity ;  Flower  had  lighted  a  cigar, 
Jigger  was  just  attempting  one  more  slice  of  melon,  when 
the  yacht  heeled,  a  plate  on  the  edge  of  the  table,  all  white 
and  gold,  shot  off,  spun  like  a  catherine-wheel,  and  died  out 
into  sparkles  of  china-dust  on  the  deck.  In  rushed  the  serv- 
ant to  clear  the  table. 

"Come  on  deck,"  said  Flower. 

A  goodish  breeze  I  It  was  a  stiff  breeze,  Blobb  !  The 
yacht  paid  off,  and  swept  away  towards  the  harbor's  mouth. 
The  red  fair-way  buoy  bobbed  ahead  in  the  distance,  like  a 
cherry  one  moment,  the  next  they  were  flying  past  it.  The 
island  seemed  sinking  into  the  sea  as  they  shot  away  from 
it,  gathering  itself  up  with  its  forts  and  spires  and  its  white 
stony  rocks,  before  settling  into  the  deep  green  waters. 
Every  now  and  then  the  shadow  of  a  huge  cloud  swept  over 
the  sea,  which  seemed  to  shrink  under  it  as  it  hurried  along. 

"Well,  how  do  you  like  her  ?"  said  Alfred. 

"  Oh,  capital  1"  said  Flower.  He  began  walking  about 
the  deck  with  the  old  "  Cowslip,"  air. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  333 

"How  do  you  feel,  Jigger  1"  said  Alfred,  suddenly 

"  Let's  go  back  F  muttered  the  youth,  making  for  the 
cabin. 

"  My  dear  fellow  F  said  Flower,  "stuff !  Now,  do  what 
I  tell  you,"  and  he  and  Jigger  seized  their  host,  and  led  him 
in  an  attentive  manner  to  the  side.  "  Boy,  some  brandy  1" 

Alfred  had  one  wild  glance  at  the  heaving,  pitiless  sea  to 
leeward,  and  to  the  long  hissing  line  of  thin  foam  beneath 
him.  Flower's  hand  was  on  his  forehead.  There  was  a 
pause,  and  Jigger  came  with  the  cognac. 

"  Now,  old  boy — there  !  off  with  it  F  said  Jigger. 

"  That's  a  man  F  said  Flower,  patting  him.  "  Never 
give  in  to  this  kind  of  thing." 

Alfred  was  better.  He  took  a  little  more  brandy.  He 
stuck  to  the  deck.  The  yacht  was  still  jumping  about,  and 
it  was  getting  darker  over  head. 

"We'll  make  a  sailor  of  you,  old  fellow  !"  said  Jigger. 
"  Now,  do  you  know  how  to  put  her  about  man-of-war  fash- 
ion ?  Ready  about !" 

Mr.  Blobb  came  running  aft.     "  What's  the  matter,  sir  ?" 

"You're  the  proprietor,  you  know,"  whispered  Flower  to 
Alfred  ;  "  you  put  her  about  yourself." 

"  I'll  put  her  about,  Blobb,"  said  Alfred. 

"  As  you  please,  sir,"  said  Blobb,  quietly.  There  was  a 
calm  satire  about  that  man's  manner  which  Alfred  stood  in 
dread  of.  "Mr.  Blobb,"  he  said,  "take  some  brandy." 

"  Thank  you,  sir,  I  ain't  sick." 

"Go  forward,  sir,"  said  Alfred,  majestically. 

"  Now  then,  '  ready,  oh  ready,  cry,' "  said  Flower. 

"Ready,  oh  ready,"  cried  Alfred,  to  the  inexpressible 
delight  of  the  cook's  boy,  who  was  watching  the  proceed- 
ings from  the  bows. 

"  Helm  down,"  said  Jigger.  Down  flew  the  helm,  and 
round  came  the  shivering  schooner,  flapping  in  the  wind ; 


334  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

over  glided  the  boom.  Really,  Alfred  thought,  it  was  the 
easiest  thing  imaginable.  Accordingly — lunch,  more  bran- 
dy ! 

By  this  time  Malta  was  lying  far  away  ;  the  wind  kept 
still  rising.  Blobb  came  and  reported  that  the  "  glass  was 
falling."  Oh,  they  would  stand  on  a  little  longer,  and  Alfred 
was  going  to  tack  her  again.  This  time  he  cried  out  "Ready, 
all  ready,"  in  a  voice  that  would  have  done  for  a  three-decker. 
Everything  went  right — except — whew  I  a  squall  came,  and 
carried  away  the  foretop-mast  ! 

"Mr.  Blobb  !"  Alfred  cried  out,  with  a  pitiable  yell. 

"  Hush,  man,"  said  Flower,  laughing,  "it's  no  great  mat- 
ter !"  Blobb  came  forward,  and  set  the  men  to  work  to 
clear  the  wreck,  which  was  struggling  in  a  mass  of  confu- 
sion. Flower  bounded  down  to  the  cabin  for  a  moment, 
and  came  up  again,  looking  a  little  graver.  He  then  went 
and  looked  at  the  compass,  and  to  windward,  and  towards 
Malta,  now  a  cloud  almost — Alfred's  eyes  all  the  time 
watching  him  with  eagerness. 

"  Well  ?"  said  Alfred,  a  little  pale. 

"  Why,  it's  coming  on  to  blow,"  Flower  said. 

"  Coining  on  !     Don't  you  call  this  blowing  ?" 

Flower  gave  a  little  laugh,  light,  but  ominous — like  a 
funeral  note  on  a  silver  hand-bell. 

"  Look  at  these  clouds,  my  boy ;  we  call  them  horse-tails." 
And  he  glanced  upwards  at  a  group  of  long,  black  strips 
of  clouds  flying  across  the  sky.  "  The  fact  is,  we  are  in  for 
a  gale,  and  we  shan't  get  back  to-night." 

The  yacht  was  too  far  to  leeward  to  get  back  in  her  dis- 
abled state,  indeed,  and  Mr.  Alfred  had  to  watch  the  pro- 
cess of  her  being  made  "all  snug."  Snug,  indeed  I  Never 
did  word  appear  to  him  such  a  misnomer  as  that. 

And  then  he  lay  on  the  cabin-lockers,  looking  out  on  the 
place  with  ghastly  eyes,  tossed  about  till  he  scarcely  knew 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  335 

whether  his  head  belonged  to  him.  He  saw,  as  in  a  vision, 
Flower  descend  and  huddle  himself  up  in  the  corner,  with 
a  cold  chicken  and  a  crust ;  and  then  Jigger  came  down  in 
his  turn,  and  overhead  there  was  an  eternal  rattling  of 
ropes,  and  a  long  night  of  dreams  followed,  till  suddenly  he 
woke,  and  found  everything  very  still.  In  the  gray  light 
of  the  morning  he  saw  Flower  and  Jigger  asleep  on  the 
cabin-floor,  like  the  babes  in  the  wood,  heaped  over  with 
cloaks.  He  went  on  deck ;  the  yacht  was  at  anchor  in 
harbor,  but  not  the  harbor  of  Malta.  To  the  right  lay  a 
quaint  old  town,  which  seemed  to  sprawl  along  the  coast, 
and  end  on  a  narrow  neck  of  rocks.  A  long,  low  shore 
spread  far  away  to  the  left,  vague  and  marshy,  with  patches 
of  water  gleaming  here  and  there,  like  fragments  of  a  broken 
mirror,  on  the  flats.  The  herbage  was  of  watery  origin ; 
green  flags  were  grouped  together,  near  the  shore.  But 
the  distance  showed  a  fine  pastoral  country,  and  the  trees 
near  the  town  were  mulberry  trees.  It  was  Sicily,  the  Idyl 
of  the  World.  The  yacht  was  in  the  harbor  of  Syracuse. 

It  was  the  nature  of  Herbert  Flower  to  accommodate 
himself  to  circumstances.  Circumstances  having  driven  the 
yacht  into  Syracuse,  kept  himself  and  Mr.  Jigger  away  be- 
yond their  leave,  and  Alfred  Snigsby  away  from  his  family, 
why,  what  was  to  be  done  ?  Clearly  to  make  the  most  of 
the  occasion,  and  see  all  that  was  to  be  seen  in  the  town. 

Behold  the  three  young  gentlemen,  then,  mounted  on 
mules,  and  trotting  away  into  the  country — ambling,  I 
should  say — for  ambling  is  the  mule's  true  pace.  The 
mule  is  a  classical  animal,  an  ecclesiastical  animal,  a  lite- 
rary animal ;  he  remindeth  you  of  the  ancients,  of  the  Jesu- 
its, of  Cervantes.  Lightly  fall  the  cudgel  on  the  beast 
which  ambles  through  the  pages  of  Don  Quixote  I 

Away  they  amble,  and  now  they  reach,  passing  through 
light  groves  of  pale  green  trees,  on  a  road  where  here  and 


336  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

there  the  country  cafe  offers  hard  red  wine — a  kind  of  glen. 
There  has  been  an  amphitheatre  here  once ;  those  long 
brown  stones,  half  covered  by  the  grass,  were  the  seats  of 
the  audience  ;  but  what  is  that  huge  carved  rock,  that  lofty 
fissure  in  yon  hill  of  stone,  crowned  by  the  scarred  brow  of 
grass  ?  'Tis  the  famous  prison — the  Ear  of  Dionysius.  It 
is  tall — long,  ah  !  with  what  propriety  it  is  long — eternal 
type  in  stone  of  the  long  ear  of  its  builder,  who  has  left  no 
monument  but  the  one  that  proves  his  infamy  I 

Well,  of  course,  the  prison  has  become  vulgarized  now-a- 
days.  There  is  a  chair  suspended  from  the  top — dangling 
ludicrously  across  the  mouth  of  the  sonorous  cavern — 
wherein  you  may  be  hoisted,  for  a  small  remuneration,  to 
the  private  hole  in  the  rock,  some  eighty  feet  up.  In  that 
hole,  says  tradition,  the  tyrant  sat. 

Now,  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  mounted  in  the  chair,  the 
guides  began  their  task  of  hoisting,  and  slowly  he  ascended 
towards  the  place.  Nothing  could  be  more  delightful  than 
the  motion.  As  you  rise  the  little  scene  around  seems  to 
expand,  the  little  picture  unrolls  itself,  and  beauty  overflows 
the  boundary  ring  of  the  sight. 

But  hillo  !  here  Alfred  had  stopped  in  air.  The  hole  is 
still  above,  the  earth  below  ;  no  motion  is  made  either  way. 
He  holloaed  loudly ;  the  melancholy  echoes  rolled  round 
the  cavern,  answering,  but  without  sympathy.  He  pain- 
fully peered  down,  but  saw  nobody.  And  so  he  must  hang 
till  our  next  chapter. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  337 


CHAPTER    III. 

To  be  perched  in  an  undulating,  cane-bottomed  chair, 
sixty  feet  above  the  level  of  the  earth,  before  the  cavern  of 
an  ancient  tyrant,  cannot  be  said  to  be  a  pleasant  situation 
for  a  Cockney.  There  is  something  in  London  life  which 
unfits  one  for  adventure.  You  are  so  thoroughly  secured 
by  the  protection  of  the  law,  so  entirely  reliant  on  the  po- 
lice, and  so  walled  in  by  the  tranquil  homeliness  of  com- 
merce, that  you  lose  some  natural  manliness.  You  have 
not  the  vigor  of  the  ancient  life,  when  a  man  held  his  tenure 
of  safety  direct  from  Nature,  and  not  from  the  joint-stock 
assurance  company  of  society.  One's  ancestors,  who  had  a 
Black  Douglas  in  his  castle  a  few  miles  off,  must  have  felt 
more  vividly,  I  imagine,  than  we  do ;  their  blood  was  a 
stronger  brew.  To  be  sure,  we  now-a-days  are  more  com- 
fortable,— but  we  know  how  much  the  capon  loses  to  qualify 
him  for  getting  fat  I 

Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  peered  round  more  anxiously  than 
ever,  when  he  heard  no  answer  to  his  shout.  His  legs 
dangled  absurdly,  and  a  slight  breeze  arising,  he  began  to 
turn  uncommonly  like  a  spitted  goose.  But  here  Mr. 
Flower  came  running  down  the  glen  at  full  speed. 

"  Snigsby  V 

"  Yes.    What's  the  matter  ?w  shouted  Alfred,  anxiously. 

"  All  right.     Lower  away  there." 

Alfred  felt  himself  descending,  and  was  delighted  to  reach 
terra  fir  ma. 

"What  has  been  up,  old  fellow  ?"  he  asked. 

"  Up  !  A  covey  of  partridges,  to  be  sure.  Why,  Jig- 
ger and  I  have  been  across  these  fields  after  the  red-legged 
villains,  saw  them  down  alongside  a  kind  of  fence,  put  them 

tf 


338  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

up — missed.  The  fact  is,  you  can't  do  anything  withont 
dogs.  It's  no  go." 

"  Yes,  that  may  be  true,"  said  Alfred  ;  "  but  I've  been 
dangling  all  the  time." 

"  I  beg  your  pardon,  old  fellow  ;  these  confounded  guides 
would  bolt  after  us,  to  see  the  fun." 

Alfred  stretched  himself,  considerably  relieved,  for  he  had 
begun  to  have  a  faint  suspicion  that  something  had  hap- 
pened serious.  Perhaps  he  thought  that  Dionysius  had 
seized  his  friends  for  trespassing.  One  might  study  a  long 
time  in  the  school  of  Brickies  without  having  much  more 
knowledge  than  the  fear  would  imply. 

There  was  now,  to  use  the  Snigsbaean  phrase,  which  gene- 
rally made  its  appearance  at  all  places  they  visited,  "  noth- 
ing more  to  see."  What  we  see,  my  dear  Snigsby,  will  de- 
pend on  the  eyes  we  bring  to  it.  I  can  testify,  from  per- 
sonal observation,  that  the  prison  of  Socrates  consists  of 
three  small  caves,  with  a  round  hole  in  the  top  of  the  mid- 
dle one.  It  would  not  occupy  four  lines  of  the  inventory 
of  a  broker,  but  I  found  no  want  of  something  to  see  there. 
The  Brickies  school  of  travellers  and  writers  always  count 
the  items  like  shopboys,  as,  indeed,  they  some  of  them  have 
been.  They  tell  you  that  the  Parthenon  only  consists  of 
a  moderate  number  of  defaced  columns.  Yery  true  ;  and 
Man  is  a  two-legged  animal,  with  a  round  head,  only  that 
he  is  plus  a  soul,  as  people  will  one  day  find  out. 

The  guides  were  paid.  Flower  stood  for  a  moment  before 
the  cavern,  moralizing.  His  laugh  rolled  all  around  the 
strange  walls,  as  he  turned  away.  The  sound  might  sug- 
gest moralizing  to  others ;  it  was  the  laugh  typical  of  the 
youth  and  the  satire  of  modern  Europe,  and  in  all  the  cav- 
erns of  the  past  that  laugh  is  raising,  and  will  raise — thun- 
der ! 

They  mounted  their  mules  and  ambled  towards  the  town 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  339 

again.  At  the  shore  they  saw  a  fine  mulberry  tree  ;  under 
the  deep,  dark  green  leaves,  the  rich  black  berries  were 
sweltering,  ripe,  pouting  at  you,  like  the  lips  of  a  young 
JEthiop.  Flower's  eye  fell  on  it.  He  gave  a  wild  excla- 
mation as  he  approached,  and  then  he  bargained  with  the 
proprietor  to  be  allowed  to  perch  himself  there  "like  a  cor- 
morant," and  devour  ad  libitum  for  a  shilling.  Neither 
Alfred  nor  Jigger  felt  inclined  to  join.  So  the  youth 
mounted  the  tree  with  the  aid  of  a  "back"  from  Alfred, 
and  there  he  sat,  perfectly  happy,  for  three  quarters  of  an 
hour,  and  came  down  with  a  mouth  as  bloody  as  a  cannibal's. 
The  others,  indeed,  accelerated  his  descent,  by  shouting  to 
him — they  were  lying  on  the  grass,  (smoking,  of  course,) 
hard  by — that  there  was  a  fair  wind.  Indeed,  it  was  high 
time  to  take  advantage  of  that  circumstance,  and  be  off 
again  to  Malta.  So  they  left  shore  without  calling  on  the 
consul,  even,  which  was  a  strange  omission,  for  Herbert 
Flower  usually  exacted  the  official  attention  paid  to  people 
of  mature  years.  He  would  have  liked  to  have  gone  to  din- 
ner at  the  consulate  in  full  dress — to  have  talked  politics 
with  the  functionary,  to  have  finished  a  bottle  of  port  at 
dessert,  and  to  have  gone  up-stairs  to  tea  and  flirtation  with 
the  family. 

Once  more  they  gained  the  Paragon's  deck.  Blobb  ! 
Where  was  Blobb  ? 

"  I  shouldn't  wonder  if  he's  gone  to  see  the  antiquities  !" 
said  Jigger,  with  a  laugh.  (And  why  not,  my  dear  Jig- 
ger?) 

"  Ha,  ha,"  laughed  Alfred—"  that's  a  good  idea." 

Mr.  Blobb  made  his  appearance  just  at  dusk.  He  was 
somewhat  red  in  the  face  and  confused  in  his  ideas.  Indeed, 
he  spoke  of  the  vessel  as  the  Dream,  and  appeared  to  fancy 
that  he  was  still  sailing  that  remarkable  yacht  for  Lord 
Blory.  Blobb  cherished  the  memory  of  his  lordship  with 


340  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;  OR, 

real  affection.  Lord  Blory  lived  half  his  life  afloat,  luxu- 
riously enjoying  himself  all  over  the  world.  He  was  the 
last  of  a  long  line,  desperately  impoverished,  and  too  proud 
(bless  him  for  that !)  to  marry  for  money.  How  he  man- 
aged to  go  on  as  he  did,  made  those  who  envied  his  fortune 
wonder.  But  some  people  do  with  their  ancestors  as  the 
papists  do  with  their  saints — work  miraples  with  their  relics. 
And  Blory  did  go  on  very  comfortably,  till  the  skull  over 
his  hatchment  in  Grosvenor-street  informed  the  connoisseurs 
in  heraldry  that  the  race  was  extinct ;  and  the  family  vault 
in shire  opened  for  the  last  time. 

"Weigh,  Mr.  Blobb,"  said  Alfred,  with  a  calm  air  of 
command.  Mr.  Blobb  gave  the  needful  orders,  going  about, 
shaking  his  head,  with  a  maudlin  expression.  The  anchor 
was  raised,  and  the  yacht  glided  away  in  the  twilight. 
Luckily,  there  was  a  good  fresh  breeze  right  on  the  quarter, 
and  so  she  held  on  straight  for  Malta.  They  passed  no- 
thing that  night  but  a  few  speronari,  beating  back  to  Sicily 
from  Yaletta  harbor.  As  they  neared  Malta,  they  fell  in 
with  the  Roarer,  Captain  Bulrush,  hovering  about  with 
apparently  no  distinct  object.  Bulrush  was  the  comic  Yan- 
derdecken  of  the  ocean.  His  brig  the  Roarer  was  the  comic 
Phantom  Ship.  Destiny  had  apparently  decreed  that  he 
should  expiate  his  sins  by  cruising  about  with  too  much  sail 
on — in  a  state  of  beer.  He  was  sometimes  hovering  about 
for  days,  when  he  ought  to  have  been  in  harbor.  One  of 
the  most  touching  things  in  story  is  the  fate  of  the  Flying 
Dutchman — but  only  think  of  the  fate  of  the  Flying  Dutch- 
man's creditors  !  The  Bulrush  hailed  the  yacht,  but  Flower 
sternly  "stood  on,"  and  in  an  hour  they  were  at  the  har- 
bor's mouth. 

So  in  the  yacht  swam,  hauling  down  the  gaff  topsail  and 
swimming  along  slowly.  Before  them  the  harbor  stretched 
away  gleaming — glittering  like  a  sword  sheathed  in  the 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  341 

stone  scabbard  of  the  white  island.  The  marina  was  fringed 
with  vessels  with  their  sails  loosed.  The  men-of-war,  too, 
had  loosed  their  sails  to  have  the  thin  night  dew  on  them, 
burned  up  by  the  scorching  sun  of  the  noon.  And  such  a 
noon  !  It  made  the  almond  trees  languid,  and  put  fever 
in  the  blood  of  the  blood-oranges. 

The  Paragon  glided  almost  close  under  the  stern  of  the 
Intolerable  ;  and  on  the  poop  was  visible  the  gleam  of  a 
green  parasol— a  parasol  green  as  the  veil  of  a  houri,  if  Mrs. 
Snigsby,  its  possessor,  will  permit  me  the  rather  "  improper" 
comparison.  Alfred  saw  at  once  that  she  was  anxiously 
awaiting  him,  and  had  been  suffering  what  is  called  "great 
mental  uneasiness."  If  one  could  calculate  the  number  of 
relatives  who  are  suffering  that  well-known  pain  from  similar 
causes  at  this  moment,  one  would  have  an  odd  statistical 
return ;  and  next,  one  would  like  to  know  the  aggregate 
cost  of  their  luncheons. 

The  Paragon  anchored — a  great  deal  nearer  the  Intoler- 
able than  Mr.  Flower  liked.  The  commander  was  now  to 
be  faced,  and  two  nights'  absence  accounted  for.  It  was  no 
use  now  to  get  up  a  story  about  sudden  illness  at  the  house 
of  the  Blocklys,  who  would  not  let  you  go.  No,  no.  The 
yacht's  return  had  been  duly  reported  by  the  signal  officer 
at  the  commander's  particular  request.  So  on  board  Mr. 
Flower  walked,  with  as  much  coolness  as  was  consistent 
with  his  visions  of  "  stopped  leave"  and  a  "  wigging."  Com- 
mander   was  a  perfect  artist  at  wigging.  If  you  argued 

with  him  during  the  operation,  it  made  him  worse.  If  you 
said  openly,  with  the  most  polite  submissiveness,  "  Well,  sir, 
it  shan't  happen  again,"  he  came  down  on  you  like  a  shot 
with — "  Not  with  impunity,  sir  1" 

But  the  commander  was  not  on  deck,  and  some  very 
extraordinary  operations  were  going  on  there — operations 
of  a  character  not  very  nautical.  Let  us  fancy  that  Alfred 


342  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA;    OR, 

has  been  embraced  by  his  mamma  on  the  poop,  to  his  unnt- 
terable  confusion,  publicly,  and  look  round  us.  The  quar- 
ter-deck guns  were  rolled  forward  (by-the-by,  a  certain  cap- 
tain once  capsized  them  to  teach  the  marines  to  march  over 
rough  ground  /)  and  the  ropes  all  coiled  up  and  off  the  deck  ; 
and  beds — new  beds  from  the  purser's  stores — were  strewn 
about,  among  an  infinite  variety  of  flags.  I  regret  to  add 
that  a  number  of  little  lamps,  such  as  one  usually  associates 
with  the  idea  of  Yauxhall,  were  lying  in  a  row  on  the  poop. 

"Why,  hallo  1"  said  Flower,  seeing  the  confusion  around, 
"  is  there  an  execution  in  the  ship  ?" 

There  was  a  loud  laugh  at  this  notion  from  a  group  of 
officers  who  were  standing  by  the  gangway ;  and,  indeed, 
there  was  a  certain  Titanic  jocosity  in  the  notion  of  any- 
body >s  "  putting  a  man"  in  a  three-decker !  It  showed  a 
cheerful  disposition  in  a  youth  who  had  "  broken  his  leave" 
by  forty-eight  hours. 

"  Hillo,  Phenomenon  ! — Ah,  Flower  of  Flory  !  how  are 
you  ?"  were  the  various  salutations  which  greeted  him. 

"  All  right.     Where's  old ?» 

Old approached  a  moment  afterwards. 

"Come  on  board,  sir,"  said  Flower.     "I  regret  ex " 

"  Of  course,  of  course,"  interrupted  the  commander,  "  you 
are  always  regretting  something.  You  could  not  get  back 
before  the  gale,  of  course  not.  You  were  obliged  to  help 
a  ship  in  distress — " 

"  I  beg  your  pardon,  sir — " 

"  Of  course,  you  beg  my  pardon — but  why  incur  the  ne- 
cessity of  doing  so  ?  No.  You  were  enjoying  your  cura- 
coa,"  said  the  commander,  awfully  imitating  what  he  fan- 
cied a  dandy  tone  of  voice — "  ongtre  vose,  amee  /"  he  added—- 
and really  he  burlesqued  French  perfectly  ! 

The  Phenomenon  looked  very  demure. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  343 

"  Well,  go  away,"  said  the  commander,  "  go  away,  Mr. 
Flower." 

Lucky  Herbert  Flower  !  For  an  approaching  event  had 
cast  something  pleasanter  than  a  shadow  before.  The  In- 
tolerable in  fact — but  this  is  the  proper  moment  to  invoke 
the  shade  of  Benbow.  Shade  of  Benbow — then — the  In- 
tolerable was  going  to  give  a  ball  1 

This  was  why  the  guns  were  rolled  forward,  and  the  very 
capstan  unshipped ;  why  the  flags  were  dragged  from  be- 
low, &c.  The  beds  and  flags  were  to  be  made  into  otto- 
mans on  the  hatchways,  duly  shut  up  with  gratings.  The 
officers  were  "  on  hospitable  thoughts  intent."  The  ship 
was  expecting  her  orders  to  come  home  soon,  and  they  re- 
solved to  leave  behind  them  the  fragrance  of  a  hospitable 
memory.  The  Snigsbys  were  invited,  and  accepted,  very 
cordially,  the  invitation.  It  was  extraordinary  to  see  how 
good,  solid  Mr.  Snigsby  pardoned  by  this  time  the  playful 
extravagances  of  naval  life.  Often  had  he,  in  full  vestry, 
indignantly  denounced  an  idle  navy  !  Often  had  he  fiercely 
inquired — backed,  too,  by  the  luminous  Snogg — why  the 
Mediterranean  fleet  was  not  sent  to  sea?  Not  unfre- 
quentiy  he  had  hinted  that  the  service  was  kept  up  to  sup- 
port an  oligarchy.  But  now  he  found  these  monsters — 
"  fattening  on  the  vitals  of  the  people  " — to  be  just  a  good- 
natured,  gentlemanly,  off-handed  set  of  fellows,  ready  to 
give  dinners,  or  eat  them,  with  anybody  thrown  in  their 
way.  Mr.  Snigsby  could  not  hate  them — no,  he  gladly  ac- 
cepted the  present  invitation. 

The  preparations  proceeded  on  board  the  Intolerable. 
The  little  lamps  gradually  assumed  the  form  of  the  letters 
Y.  R.  The  main-deck  was  prepared  for  the  supper,  every- 
body declaring  it  the  proper  place,  always  excepting  Bob 
Buggies,  the  second  master,  whose  wishes  not  running  in 


344  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OK, 

the  ball  way,  led  him  to  condemn  the  proceeding  as  con- 
trary to  all  discipline.  Arid  there  was  still  a  wound  rank- 
ling in  the  breast  of  Bob.  When  the  Intolerable  was  at 
Naples,  some  time  before  this,  the  officers  were  asked  to  a 
royal  ball.  But  the  second  master  and  master's  assistants — 
indeed  the  genus  Bung  (to  use  the  naval  name)  were  not 
included.  Bob  went  about  the  ship,  indignantly  inquiring 
"  why  ?"  to  the  inextinguishable  delight  of  Herbert  Flower 
and  the  other  youngsters.  Herbert  caused  great  amuse- 
ment by  the  refined  impertinence  with  which  he  consoled 
Bob  on  the  occasion. 

"  It's  all  part  of  a  confounded  system,  Bob,"  he  said  j  "  I 
myself  don't  approve  of  those  social  distinctions,  you  know, 
(here  he  shrugged  his  little  shoulders  inimitably,)  a  mere 
antiquated  affair,  but  somehow  things  are  all  based  on  'em. 
Eh,  Rivers  ?" 

"  But  what  do  you  mean,  Flower,  hey  ?  Aint  I  aboard 
of  this  ship  as  an  officer  and  a  gentleman,  and  equal  to  any- 
body?" 

It  was  glorious  to  see  the  little  villains  gazing  seriously 
on  Bob. 

"  Why,  of  course,  you're  an  officer  and  a  gentleman,  Bob. 
I  suppose  you  know  it  is  some  confounded  consideration  of 
family.  I  say  nothing,  Bob,  only  you  know  the  nature  of 
aristocracy,  Bob."  | 

And  so  poor  Ruggles  went  away  with  a  burning  heart 
from  his  affectionate  sympathizers,  who  roared  jovially  over 
the  incident,  as  they  smoked  the  evening  cigar.  Of  course 
Bob  Ruggles  could  not  be  expected  to  love  balls  or  the  sort 
of  people  who  frequent  them. 

Everybody  was  asked  to  this  ball,  that  was  one  comfort. 
The  captain's  cabin  was  abundantly  supplied  with  refresh- 
ments for  the  benefit  of  quiet  old  fellows ;  fellows  whose 
dancing  days  are  over,  and  who  just  talk  about  professional 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  345 

points  and  sporting,  over  sherry,  and  leave  their  daughters 
to  "  amuse  themselves."  The  dusk  came  on,  and  then  boat 
after  boat  began  to  leave  the  shore  and  the  ships.  Luckily 
it  was  a  beautiful  night.  So,  thankfully  ejaculated  Mrs. 
Snigsby,  as  she  wrapped  herself  in  an  immense  shawl,  and 
leant  back  in  a  shore  boat.  So,  thankfully  ejaculated 
Alfred,  putting  on  his  gloves  in  ditto.  Mr.  Snigsby  said 
nothing  ;  he  had  a  notion  that  it  was  chilly,  but  how  could 
he  venture  to  say  that  a  Mediterranean  night  was  chilly  be- 
fore Mrs.  S.  ? 

"  Bless  me  !"  exclaimed  Mrs.  Snigsby,  as  they  gained  the 
deck,  shrouded  in  with  awnings,  brilliant  with  flags,  and 
glittering  with  lights.  "  Bless  me,  you  would  never  think 
it  was  a  man-of-war." 

"  Never,  at  any  time,  my  dear  madam  I"  said  Herbert 
Flower,  politely  offering  his  arm,  and  looking  like  a  pigmy 
by  the  side  of  her  majestic  form. 

Two  or  three  people  within  hearing  of  the  Phenomenon 
chuckled.  The  commander,  who  guessed  that  it  was  a  sar- 
casm, from  the  distance,  summoned  Mr.  Flower  to  him. 

"  Not  quite  so  conspicuous,  Mr.  Flower.  Not  quite  so 
conspicuous,  sir  I"  he  said,  with  his  loftiest  manner. 

Herbert  was  annoyed,  he  did  not  like  to  be  snubbed,  and 
that,  too,  just  as  little  Lucy  Beddoes  was  passing  by. 
Lucy  Beddoes  was  a  "  nice  little  girl,"  according  to  Flow- 
er's phraseology. 

"  Isn't  it  a  shame  ?"  he  said  to  her,  when  he  got  her  arm. 
"  That's  the  way  we're  treated,  you  see,  in  this  profession." 

"  I  hope  he  has  not  hurt  your  feelings  ?"  said  Lucy, 
simply. 

"  Hurt  the (he  was  almost  saying,  hurt  the  devil). 

Hurt  my  feelings  1  No.  He  bores  me,  though,  by  his  con- 
founded impertinence.  Ah,  Snigsby!  Let  me  introduce 
my  friend,  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby." 

15* 


346  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;   OR, 

Alfred  was  superbly  dressed.  Lucy  Beddoes  knew  they 
had  a  yacht.  Alfred  had  a  very  gracious  little  bow.  She 
could  not  help  respecting  a  youth  of  "  expectations."  Not 
that  she  was  an  atom  mercenary,  only  helpless,  poor  thing  1 
You  observe  that  girls  must,  many  of  them,  put  love  out  of 
the  question,  now-a-days.  Political  economy  demands  it — 
and  is  not  that  an  answer  to  everything  ? 

Alfred's  mamma  called  him  away  at  this  moment. 

"  Well,  how  do  you  like  my  friend  Snigsby  ?"  said  Flower, 
chuckling.  -  7 • -• 

"  He  is  very  nicely  dressed/7  said  Lucy  demurely. 

"  A  great  deal  of  money,  I  assure  you,"  Flower  said, 
"  and  he  is  the  only  child.  What  say  you  ?  Let's  go 
halves  P 

"  For  shame !"  said  the  girl,  laughing,  and  blushing  a 
little. 

"  Fm  serious  ! — We'll  divide  him  between  us.  You  shall 
have  half  the  money  and  him  into  the  bargain  !" 

But  here  began  the  music,  and  interrupted  the  pure  play- 
fulness of  this  child  of  nature.  The  company  were  crowd- 
ing the  deck.  You  were  sheltered  by  a  high  awning,  and 
by  flags  of  all  hues.  The  effect  was  a  bright  lightness — the 
temperature  delicious.  Nature  helped  the  artificial  to  per- 
fection. You  just  got  enough  air  to  keep  you  pleasantly 
cool.  If  there  happened  to  be  a  rent  in  the  spacious  trem- 
bling roof,  you  saw  a  star  through  it — and  the  champagne 
must  have  been  bad,  if  you  could  not  say  something  pretty 
to  your  partner  apropos  of  that  !  Unless,  to  be  sure,  she 
was  the  daughter  of  a  captain  in  command,  and  too  con- 
scious of  her  high  rank  to  encourage  any  playfulness  of 
observation. 

Flirtation,  were  the  subject  treated  (not  by  a  cockney 
parvenu  of  course)  by  some  gentleman  and  scholar  with 
humor,  sentiment,  and  sense,  would  afford  matter  for  a 


,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  347 

delightful  essay.  Willis  would  be  a  dash  too  flippant ;  Sir 
Edward  is  becoming  a  little  too  grave ;  and  Thackeray 
would  tinge  it  with  the  melancholy  of  his  deep  reflection. 
But,  really,  Flirtation  deserves  a  commentator.  It  bears 
the  same  relation  to  love  that  a  belief  in  fairies  does  to  reli- 
gion. One  might  compare  it  to  the  old  tournaments — 
mimicries  of  real  war — but  not  only  mimicries — dangerous 
wounds  have  been  received  at  many  a  "  gentle  passage  of 
arms" — as  the  old  writers  called  them.  Flirtation  is  dis- 
tinctly to  be  commended.  Is  it  not  a  recognition — though 
but  in  sportiveness — of  the  existence  of  that  divine  sentiment 
which  relates  the  sexes  to  each  other  ?  'Tis  an  escape  from 
the  too  solid  realities  of  "  fortunes  "  and  "  expectations,"  a 
playful  butterfly  flight  over  their  iron  walls.  And  Flirtation 
will  reveal  to  you,  perhaps,  the  higher  sentiment  in  time. 
Franklin  discovered  the  relation  between  lightning  and 
electricity  by  a  simple  schoolboy  kite.  Much  has  been 
learnt  about  love's  heaven  by  the  playful  idling  of  Flirta- 
tion. 

But  to  return :  for  the  band  on  the  poop  is  playing  away 
merrily.  The  quadrilles  are  crowded.  The  "  youngsters  " 
are  enjoying  themselves  immensely — excepting  those  of  the 
"  Borderer,"  for  Captain  Plebbe  makes  them  dance  with  his 
plain  daughters — "  to  a  man,  sir,  every  one  of  us,"  says  little 
Jogg,  protesting  that  it  is  disgraceful.  The  quarter-deck  is 
walled  in  from  the  ship's  crew,  but  they  peer  through  inter- 
stices—the  grave  boatswain  looking  at  the  flying  damsels 
with  the  mingled  awe  and  merriment  of  Tarn  o'  Shanter  at 
the  Kirk  of  Alloway  "  Stand  back,  there,"  says  Toady  ley 
to  a  sailor  or  two  who  are  inclined  to  obtrude  on  the  hal- 
lowed ground.  Toadyley  wants  to  know  "what  things  are 
coming  to,"  when  the  aristocracy  can  be  subjected  to  this 
kind  of  thing  ?  Indeed,  the  poor  fellow  had  plenty  to  do, 
for  Toadyley  began  by  disposing  of  all  the  shawls  with  the 


348  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

carefulness  of  a  counter-jumper ;  then  he  had  to  set  down 
a  snug  sherry-and-loo  party  in  a  quiet  cabin  ;  then  he  had  to 
blow  up  the  mess  stewards  who  were  preparing  for  the  sup- 
per ;  to  find  partners  (which  was  not  easy)  for  the  Com- 
mander's maiden  aunt ;  to  take  care  that  nobody  under  the 
rank  of  a  lieutenant  presumed  to  ask  the  Baronet's  wife  to 
dance ;  and  to  keep  the  edtior  of  the  Popgun  from  prema- 
ture intoxication.  And  Toadyley  did  the  work  of  a  waiter 
so  well,  you  would  never  have  thought  he  was  a  gentleman, 
I  assure  you  I 

A  polka — there  was  some  rapture  about  a  polka  in  those 
early  days  ! — had  just  concluded.  Alfred  had  been  dancing 
with  Lucy  Beddoes,  and  really  she  could  be  very  agreeable 
if  she  liked.  Herbert  and  one  or  two  youths  were  moving 
about  near  them.  They  approached. 

"  Well,  and  have  you  enjoyed  yourself,  Alfred  ?"  asked 
Mr.  Flower,  paternally. 

"  Yes,"  said  Alfred. 

"  And  you,  Miss  Beddoes,  eh  ?" 

"  Oh  yes  ;  very  much,"  Lucy  answered  ;  "  where  is  papa  ?" 

"  Playing  at  your  namesake — loo  ! — Alfred,  I  must  intro- 
duce you  to  Captain  Beddoes."  Alfred  said  he  would  be 
very  happy,  though  he  was  a  little  frightened. 

But  at  this  time  Jigger  mysteriously  withdrew  his  friend 
Herbert  from  the  group. 

"  Come  along,"  he  said,  "  there  are  a  few  of  us  going  to 
have  a  snug  glass  of  bitter  beer  in  the  gun  room.  I'm  hot 
and  bothered." 

Herbert  was  just  going  to  assent,  but  his  eye  caught  the 
figure  of  a  lady  on  the  poop.  It  is  so  delightfully  cool  there 
on  these  occasions  when  the  night  is  lovely  1  Herbert 
quietly  glided  away.  The  lady  was  sitting  on  a  chair  by 
herself — Mrs.  Plumerher  name  was  ;  a  widow — travelling  to 
*' forget" — and  succeeding  ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  349 

Mrs.  Plumer  was  a  very  clever  woman  and  decidedly 
good-looking — well-shaped,  decisive  features  she  had.  She 
liked  Flower  as  a  "  character,"  and  motioned  to  him  to  sit 
down  beside  her. 

"Ah,  good  evening,"  said  Flower.  "'I  did  not  know 
you  were  on  board.  I  have  not  seen  you  for  a  long  time." 

"  My  father  has  not  been  well." 

"  I  hope  he's  getting  better.  I  am  just  come  to  have  a 
chat  with  you.  This  is  the  place  for  flirting,  you  know,  Mrs. 
Plumer.  I  can  flirt  with  perfect  safety.  Flory  is  despe- 
rately mortgaged,  and  nobody  would,  could,  or  should 
accept  me,  unless  they  had  plenty  of  money.  I  should  like 
to  water  our  ancestral  roses  with  a  shower  of  gold  !" 

"  That's  a  romantic  sentiment,  I  am  sure,  Mr.  Herbert 
Flower." 

"  It  is  a  perfectly  truthful  one,  believe  me.  Now  if  I  had 
the  wealth  of  my  friend  Snigsby" — and  Herbert  gave  a 
pompous  burlesque  accent  to  the  three  words. 

"  Snigsby — what  a  curious  name  !  Are  they  new  arri- 
vals here?" 

"  Not  particularly  new,  but  they  are  very  rich.  Came 
in  their  own  yacht." 

"  Is  there  not  a  Miss  Snigsby  ?"  asked  the  lady. 

"  No.  By-the-by,  he  ought  to  have  a  sister  !  But  I 
wonder  you  have  never  met  them." 

"  Why,  we  have  not  been  out  much  lately.  You  know  we 
moved  from  our  old  place." 

"  I  didn't  know  that." 

"  Yes,  to  Strada  Sotta" 

Flower  gave  a  little  srart.  "  Let  me  see — leads  out  of 
the  Strada  Reale  towards  the  Quarantine  harbor,  don't  it  ?" 

"  Just  so.  And  by-the-by,  now  I  think  of  it,"  said  Mrs. 
Plumer,  laughing  slightly  and  coloring  a  little,  "an  odd 
thing  happened  there  a  week  or  two  ago."  She  paused  and 


350  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

laughed  again.  "  One  night  after  I  had  been  playing — but 
I  must  tell  you,  first,  that  a  day  or  two  before  that,  I  had 
once  or  twice  met  an  English  youth  in  the  street " 

There  was  an  exquisite  gravity  about  Flower  at  that 
moment. 

"  What  manner  of  youth  ?"  he  asked. 

"Rather  tall  and  what  you  call  '  loud*  in  his  dress.  He 
might  be  a  gentleman  who  was  silly,  or  a  bagman  who  was 
ambitious." 

Flower  covered  his  face  with  his  pocket-handkerchief,  as 
if  his  nose  had  begun  to  bleed.  Suddenly  he  jumped  up 
with  a  "  pray  excuse  me,"  and  ran  down  the  poop  ladder  ! 
A  dance  was  just  over,  and  the  group  breaking  up.  He 
met  Jigger. 

"  Where  is  young  Snigsby  ?"  he  asked. 

"  Saw  him  just  this  moment.     There  he  is  !" 

Flower  went  in  the  direction  indicated,  and  found  Alfred 
sitting  on  one  of  the  ottomans  arranged  on  the  hatchway 
gratings,  next  a  comfortable  old  lady,  who  occupied  the 
entire  double-headed  eagle  of  Russia  with  her  portly  person. 
He  was  glad  to  get  away.  Flower  was  wanting  to  intro- 
duce him  to  a  most  agreeable  person.  He  must  come.  Mrs. 
Snigsby,  who  watched  him  from  a  distance,  and  who,  by- 
the-by,  was  very  gloomy  herself — while  Snigsby,  pere,  had 
doomed  an  elderly  gentleman  to  a  dose  of  the  currency — 
felt  quite  glad  to  see  her  son  receive  so  much  attention. 

"This  way,  old  fellow,"  said  Herbert,  leading  him  to  Mrs. 
Plumer. 

Alfred  stopped  short,  and  turned  deadly  pale.  Mrs. 
Plumer  saw  the  whole  case  in  a  moment,  and  bowed  most 
simply. 

"  I  see,  Mr.  Flower,"  Alfred  said.  "  I  see  it  all.  I'm  a 
gentleman — although — "  he  stuttered  and  gasped  horribly. 
"  It's  too  bad » 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  351 

Flower  took  hold  of  his  wrist,  and  pulled  him  round. 

"  Hush,  man,  for  God's  sake  mind  what  you  are  about ! — 
It's  the  change  of  atr  from  the  quarter-deck,  Mrs.  Plumer, 
that  affects  him." 

"  Pray  sit  down,  Mr.  Snigsby,"  she  said,  kindly.  "  What 
a  beautiful  night  it  is." 

Her  manner  was  exquisitely  contrived  to  make  him  fancy 
she  was  utterly  ignorant  of  the  cause  of  his  agitation. 
How  Flower  admired  her  for  it ! 

Alfred  stammered  out,  "  I  have  been  a  little  ill."  And 
sitting  down,  he  began  to  feel  quieter,  and  to  feel  attracted 
as  he  had  felt  when  he  first  saw  her.  He  thought,  "Well, 
she  does  not  remember  me,  really." 

For  Mr.  Alfred  (Brickies  and  Co.  behold  your  pupil  !) 
had  no  great  opinion  of  the  female  intellect,  poor  fellow. 
And  then,  with  the  most  innocent  folly,  he  began  babbling 
away  quite  freely  to  the  lady,  who  laughed — not  at  his  jokes, 
but  at  his  sad  mistake.  Herbert  Flower,  who  had  been 
afraid  of  a  scene  at  first,  enjoyed  the  present  phase  immensely. 
And  at  that  moment  a  sensation  began  on  deck,  like  the 
commotion  in  the  theatre  at  Pompeii,  in  Bulwer's  novel, 
when  Arbaces  pointed  to  the  smoke  issuing  from  Vesuvius, 
for  everybody  heard  the  word  "  Supper." 


CHAPTER    IY. 

MR.  HERBERT  FLOWER  bounded  away  to  take  down  little 
Lucy  Beddoes.  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  offered  his  arm  to  Mrs. 
Plumer,  and  off  they  went  together.  He  was  in  a  pleasura- 
ble tumult  of  excitement,  poor  fellow,  what  in  a  merrier 
mood  he  would  have  called  "spoony."  It  is  observable, 
that  the  school  of  Brickies,  who  see  nothing  holy  in  any 
sentiment,  are  always  made  greater  fools  by  what  elevates 


352  SWELL   LIFE  AT  SEA;   OR, 

the  rest  of  the  world.  The  gods  are  just,  and  avenge  them- 
selves on  the  proper  occasion.  When  the  Bricklesarian 
writers,  for  example,  give  up  pertness  for  pathos,  the  dogs 
become  as  common-place  as  mutes.  When  they  try  poetry 
or  love-matters,  they  describe  like  auctioneers,  and  introduce 
us  to  dowdies.  It  is  their  consummate  misfortune  that  they 
cannot  get  out  of  their  own  offensive  briskness  without 
becoming  bores. 

Alfred  really  became  the  very  thing  he  most  emphatically 
contemned,  a  muff,  on  this  occasion.  He  had  not  the  incli- 
nation to  try  his  favorite  lively  style  of  conversation.  Mrs. 
Plumer,  too,  saw  farther  into  everything  he  started  as  a 
subject  than  himself,  and  bewildered  him  immensely.  All 
he  knew  was  that  he  admired  her  very  much  ;  that  he  had 
a  great  anxiety  to  keep  talking  to  her,  without  knowing 
what  to  talk  about  ;  and  that  he  was  helpless.  Somehow 
he  did  not  seem  to  advance  at  all  with  his  attachment.  She 
resisted  him  by  some  unseen  influence,  like  that  which  one 
has  read  of  as  keeping  off  intruders  from  particular  rooms 
in  enchanted  castles.  He  would  have  liked  just  to  be  able 
to  say,  "  I  love  you.  I  shaU  have  an  immense  deal  of  money, 
much  more  than  those  nobs  there.  Be  mine  and  marry 
me !"  I  am  far  from  supposing,  by-the-by,  that  such  a 
straightforward  course  would  not  please  many  lovely  beings  ; 
nay,  I  am  not  certain  that  it  would  not  be  a  much  more 
respectable  way  of  doing  business  than  the  ordinary  one. 
But  we  could  not  expect  Alfred  to  set  such  an  example  of 
originality.  No.  There  he  stood  (a  good  deal  in  the  way 
of  some  of  the  guests)  the  Tantalus  of  the  banquet. 

Meanwhile,  the  said  banquet  was  going  on  very  bravely. 
A  few  sturdy  revellers  whom  nobody  had  seen  till  it  began, 
were  mauling  the  architecture  of  jellies  and  raised  pies,  like 
Turks  among  the  Acropolis.  Captain  Plebbe  of  the  Bor- 
derer kept  his  youngsters  pretty  busily  employed  supplying 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          353 

the  before-mentioned  plain  daughters  with  all  "  the  delica- 
cies of  the  season,"  as  the  Popgun  of  course  called  the 
dishes.  The  poor  boys  attracted  a  good  deal  of  attention 
among  observant  people  in  consequence,  and  Herbert  Flower 
made  an  immense  sensation  by  calling  out  "waiter"  to  one 
of  them  in  a  marked  manner.  The  youngster  was  in  a 
furious  rage  of  course  ;  several  people  laughed.  As  for 
Plebbe,  he  was  perfectly  savage,  and  glared  on  Mr.  Flower 
like  a  demon. 

"  Really,  you  ought  to  be  more  careful  about  the  opinion 
of  your  superiors,"  said  Miss  Beddoes  to  Herbert. 

"  My  superiors,"  said  Herbert,  "  indeed." 

"  Now  you  know  he  is  your  superior,  Herbert,"  said  the 
sensible  Lucy,  whose  papa  was  a  very  worthy  captain  of 
artillery. 

"  He  is  a  captain,  if  you  mean  that,  of  course.  But  his 
rank  as  Plebbe  is  not  equal  to  my  rank  as  Flower,"  said  the 
youth  majestically.  "  Plebbe  is  who-knows-who,  somewhere 
about  Portsmouth  ;  I  am  Flower  of  Flory  !  I  quarter  the 
shields  of  peers,  and  I  date  from  Edward  the  First  !"  and 
so  saying,  Mr.  Flower  tossed  off  a  glass  of  champagne  with 
the  air  of  an  Emperor. 

After  all,  the  sentiment  embodied  in  the  young  gentle- 
man's speech  has  an  existence  afloat,  nor  is  the  said  exist- 
ence favorable  to  discipline.  When  the  service  does  go  to 
the  devil,  as  we  are  told  by  so  many  worthy  officers  that 
it  will,  depend  on  it,  it  will  be  at  its  most  aristocratic  stage. 

Lucy  smiled  and  shook  her  head.  She  knew  Flory  well. 
Her  father  had  once  been  stationed  at  the  neighboring 
county  town.  Flower  senior  had  twice  written  to  Herbert, 
to  tell  him  to  be  very  civil  to  the  Beddoeses,  and  not  to  fall 
in  love  with  Lucy,  whatever  he  did. 

"  Look  at  your  friend  Snigsby,"  she  said,  smiling.  Flower 
glanced  along  the  table.  Alfred  was  the  picture  of  spoon- 


354  SWELL   LIFS   AT   SEA;    OR, 

mess,  as  his  school  call  it,  and  the  fair  widow  was  talking 
with  uncommon  animation  to  a  group  round  her.  One  often 
wonders  how  some  survivors  must  tremble  at  the  word 
RESURGAM  on  a  hatchment  !  To  be  sure,  it  now-a-days 
generally  passes  for  meaning  nothing. 

One  more  polka !  The  supper  table  was  a  splendid 
wreck,  and  the  deck  strewed  with  crushed  flowers  here  and 
there.  There  was  a  dim  feeling  of  chilliness  coming  on  on 
deck  too.  The  daylight  came  faintly  over  the  island,  and  a 
stray  breeze  came  freshly  in,  cool  from  miles  of  sea.  The 
awning  had  fallen  in  at  one  part,  and  the  flags  shifted  from 
their  places  into  disorderly  gaudiuess.  There  was  a  general 
murmur  about  shawls,  and  the  necessity  of  getting  boats 
ready.  "  Skip's  boats,  indeed,  ha  ! — to  land  dancers,  ha  !" 
Such  was  the  growl  of  the  Bung,  from  his  hammock  in  the 
cock-pit,  as  he  heard  the  "  pipe  "  sound.  Herbert  Flower 
put  on  his  friend  Lucy's  shawl,  playfully  and  fraternally.  I 
am  afraid  he  never  thought,  as  the  youths  who  lead  Herbert 
Flower-ish  lives  ought  to  think,  of  the  sad  contrast  between 
themselves  and  pure,  fine-hearted  girls.  Flower  escorted 
her  to  a  boat,  in  company  with  her  father,  who  had  just 
emerged  from  the  sung  cabin.  The  old  gentleman  was  very 
red  and  silent,  and  apparently  firmly  brooding  over  some- 
thing which  employed  his  whole  faculties.  He  leaned  rather 
heavily  on  the  arm,  considering  what  a  light  little  arm  it 
was,  which  Lucy  held  to  him  as  he  stepped  into  the  boat. 
So  far  Herbert  saw  ;  half-an-hour  afterwards  you  might 
have  seen  a  little  figure,  like  a  happy  ghost,  gliding  away 
with  papa's  candle — leaving  papa  snoring  in  safety — and 
putting  papa's  Seltzer  water  within  easy  reach — and  then 
retiring  to  its  own  place  of  rest — the  happy  beautiful 
ghost ! 

The  Intolerable's  deck  was  a  scene  of  confusion,  and  pale 
faces,  and  limp  curls.  Boat  after  boat  was  sent  away  full, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          355 

and  the  ship's  boats  being  insufficient  in  number,  shore 
boats  were  summoned. 

"  Paragon's  boat  1"  shouted  Alfred  from  the  gangway, 
with  the  air  of  a  naval  captain.  That  villain  Blobb  had 
sent  the  dingy,  only  1  How  could  that  boat  take  on  shore 
the  family — plus  Mrs.  Plumer,  arid  a  female  friend,  to  whom 
the  gallant  Alfred  offered  a  passage  ?  At  last  Blobb  sent 
— nothing  excited  Blobb  to  unseemly  haste — the  large  boat. 

In  they  all  got,  and  off  went  the  boat,  keeping  alongside 
another  one  loaded  with  merry  guests.  A  young  gentleman 
of  the  Rifles  gaily  threw  off  an  operatic  burst  of  song. 
Alfred  was  in  the  highest  spirits,  burning  with  conceit,  and 
with  that  liquid  embodied  conceit — champagne. 

"  Boat  there  ;  out  of  the  way,  that  boat  !" 

A  green  and  red  shore  boat  came  heavily  steering — 
apparently  right  at  the  Paragon's  boat. 

"  Yes,"  resumed  Alfred — and  off  he  went  with  a  youp, 
youp  youp,  tra  la  la,  la  la!  So  I  presume  to  attempt  the 
notation  of  a  remarkable  chorus  at  all  events. 

u  Meester  Sneegsby,"  cried  a  Maltese  voice  from  the  strange 
boat ;  "Meester  Sneegsby,  pay  me,  signor !" 

If  the  reader  has  never  heard  the  peculiar  shrill  "pay"  or 
"  poy"  me  of  a  Maltese — I  hope  he  never  may  !  There  is 
an  unearthly  mingled  with  a  Hebraic  twang  in  it,  impossi- 
ble to  describe — and  equally  impossible  to  tolerate. 

Both  boats  of  guests  were  astonished.  "  Keep  that  fel- 
low off.  Break  his  head  !"  cried  somebody. 

"  I  owe  no  man  a  shilling,  sir,"  cried  Mr.  Snigsby. 

"No,  sar — de  tall  young  gentleman,  sir  !  Meester  Sneegsby!" 

Alfred  rose  up  in  the  boat.  His  face  grew  ghastly  in  the 
daylight — the  fresh  Mediterranean  daylight. 

11  Pay  me  for  bring  de  ladder  to  Strada  Sotta,  Meest&r 
Sneegsby  /" 

What  a  catastrophe  !     Alfred'distinctly  remembered  that 


356  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

there  was  a  balance — a  balance  due  the  Maltese  from  that 
night  of  humiliation.  He  was  sobered  and  shivered  ;  stam- 
mered out  something — flung  some  money  into  the  terrible 
boat — more  money  by  far  than  he  even  needed  to  have 
paid. 

There  was  a  silence  as  they  passed  on.  Poor  Mrs. 
Snigsby !  Alfred's  heart  bled — to  do  him  justice — as  he 
saw  her  white  handkerchief  employed.  Mrs.  Plumer's  veil 
was  down.  She  said  nothing — appeared  to  hear  nothing. 
Mr.  Snigsby  leaned  back  in  his  seat,  and  looked  like  a  con- 
demned criminal. 

There  was  not  much  jollity  after  this  event.  Some  ru- 
mor about  the  ladder  story  had  oozed  out.  The  hero  was 
now  revealed.  However  amused  the  gentlemen  were,  they 
could  not  laugh.  The  ladies  of  course  were  "  shocked." 
But  soon  the  boats  reached  the  landing  place. 

There  they  separated  into  parties,  and  the  time  came  to 
bid  Mrs.  Plumer  good  night  She  was  a  strong-minded 
woman ;  she  found  two  minutes  in  which  to  say  to  Mr. 
Alfred  "  two  words." 

"I  shall  not,  I  suppose,"  Alfred  said,  ruefully,  "see 
you — see  you — again,  Mrs.  Plumer." 

"  Candidly,"  said  Mrs.  Plumer,  "  I  fear  not — under  the 
circumstances.  My  father — " 

Alfred's  jaw  fell.  He  remembered  the  stout  old  gentle- 
man ! 

"Then  I  shall  not,  I  suppose,  accompany  you  to  the 
door?" 

"  No,"  said  Mrs.  Plumer,  "  nor  the  window,  I  hope." 

For  the  life  of  her  Mrs.  Plumer  could  not  resist  that 
parting  shot.  The  groups  separated.  And  off  went  the 
Snigsbys  home. 

"  I  wish  I  was  dead,"  Alfred  broke  silence  with  as  they 
strolled  home. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  357 

"  You're  in  a  fair  way  to  obtain  your  wishes,  sir,"  said 
his  father. 

"Don't  be  cruel  to  him,  Mr.  Snigsby,"  said  his  mother. 
"Poor  Alf!" 

"  I  don't  want  to  be  called  Alf.  I'm  too  old  for  these 
absurdities." 

"  And  ought  to  be,  sir,  for  your  other  ones,"  said  his 
father,  again.  Mr.  Snigsby  once  more  had  the  best  of  it. 

This  last  event  decided  Mr.  Snigsby,  who  reflected  on  the 
matter,  that  they  ought  to  take  a  cruise.  He  was  getting 
tired  of  Malta.  Those  who  remember  his  late  exertions  in 
the  great  "  Papal  aggression  "  question  will  know  how  often 
he  alluded  to  his  own  "  personal  observation  of  the  effects 
of  a  debasing  superstition."  The  fact  is,  Mr.  Snigsby  was 
bored  by  the  bells  of  Malta  and  sick  of  the  sight  of  shovel 
hats.  Mr.  Fatton,  of  St.  Kilderkin,  though  courteous,  was 
not  now  cordial  altogether.  "No  man  respected  Mr. 
Snigsby  more,"  he  said,  it  is  true — and  nobody  can  deny 
that  he  received  his  donation  to  the  church  in  a  friendly 
spirit  !  But  still  the  Snigsby s  were  only  "good  worldly 
people,"  in  the  Reverend  Mr.  Fatton's  parlance.  "Well 
meaning  people,  undoubtedly,"  little  Fatton  added,  "  but — !" 
Somehow  they  wanted  that  sable  bloom  which  distinguished 
the  Fatton  clique.  And  the  little  fat-headed  man,  though 
most  polite  when  they  met,  came  not  to  the  hospitable 
rooms  in  Strada  Reale  so  often  as  before.  Possibly  Mr. 
Fatton  had  doubts  about  the  state  of  Mr.  Snigsby's  soul : 
possibly  he  was  too  much  occupied  with  taking  care  of  his 
own — though  there  was  not  so  very  much  of  it. 

Then  the  squadron  were  going  to  sea  for  a  cruise.  And 
some  people  thought  it  was  quite  time.  The  youngsters 
were  sadly  dunned.  Alfred  was  on  board  the  "  Intolerable" 
one  morning,  when  an  unhappy  Maltese  was  pelted  in  the 
cockpit  with  clothes  brushes. 


358  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;   OR, 

Accordingly  orders  were  sent  on  board  to  Blobb — Blobb 
the  stately — to  prepare  for  sea.  "  They  never  knows  their 
own  minds,"  said  the  sulky  veteran,  "  never  for  a  hinstant  1" 
But  he  went  growling  about  and  doing  whatever  was  need- 
ful. 

The  squadron  were  all  lying  with  top-gallant  yards 
crossed,  and  the  studding-sail  gear  rove — to  speak  nautical- 
ly.  The  admiral  issued  a  long  un-readable  general  order 
about  discipline — and  sent  the  fleet  to  sea  under  the  senior 
captain — remaining  on  shore  himself.  There  was  a  fine  scene 
of  activity  one  morning.  The  "  Intolerable "  bumped 
against  the  "  Regina ;"  the  "Bustard"  let  a  top-gallant 
yard  tumble  down,  and  it  went  bang  through  the  deck  ; 
the  "  Lotos"  got  aground;  the  "Struldbrug"  split  a  sail. 
Out  they  all  got,  however,  ultimately,  and  commenced  sail- 
ing in  columns,  which  order  they  maintained  by  the  aid  of 
the  senior  captain  perpetually  signalling  certain  ships  to 
"  keep  their  station  " — which  with  ships  as  with  families  is 
just  the  most  difficult  thing  to  get  done  with  accuracy.  As 
often  as  the  signal  was  made,  so  often  the  captain  "  wigged  n 
the  lieutenant,  the  lieutenant  the  midshipman — "  the  cat 
began  to  worry  the  rat,  the  rat  began  to — "  &c.,  according 
to  the  well  known  process  among  cats,  rats,  and  men. 

Mr.  Blobb  made  the  necessary  preparations,  and  the 
Snigsbys  once  more  embarked  on  the  sea.  It  was  evening 
when  they  went  on  board  the  yacht.  Mr.  Blobb  had 
mounted  the  "  green  patch "  again  over  his  eye.  There 
was  something  mysterious  about  that  patch,  and  it  seemed 
to  bode  no  good. 

They  were  to  start  next  morning,  after  "  a  good  night's 
sleep."  But  what  was  Mr.  Snigsby's  astonishment  when 
waking  in  the  middle  of  the  night,  he  heard — not  "  the 
night  fowl  crow,"  as  Tennyson's  Mariana  did  about  that 
time,  but  a  louder  and  more  disagreeable  hubbub.  There 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  359 

was  a  shuffling  noise  indeed  audible.  Mr.  Snigsby  shuffled 
on  some  clothes,  crawled  up  stairs,  (to  use  his  own  phrase,) 
and  found  the  vessel  under  sail.  His  first  impression  was, 
that  Mr.  Blobb  was  going  to  take  them  all  off,  and  sell  them 
for  slaves. 

"  Mr.  Blobb  I"     It  was  pitch  dark. 

Snigsby  listened.     "  Mr.  Blobb  1" 

"  Hush  !     Oh,  it's  you,  sir." 

"Why,  what  the  devil  are  you  about,  Mr.  Blobb?  I 
told  you  we  didn't  want  to  sail  till  the  morning." 

"Mr.  SAnigsby,"  said  Blobb,  speaking  thick,  while  the 
perfume  of  rum  hovered  in  the  night  air  ;  "  you  are  a  man 
and  a  brother." 

Mr.  Snigsby's  heart  sank  within  him  at  this  commence- 
ment. 

"I  wash  left  an  orphan,  Mr.  SAnigsby,"  maundered  on 
the  skipper,  "  and  brought  up  to  sea-faring,  as  my  father 
before  me.  First  of  all,  I  swerved  along  with " 

"  Never  mind,  Mr.  Blobb,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  feeling  his 
utter  dependence  on  the  terrible  skipper.  "But  why  are 
we  a-weigh  now  ?" 

"  SAtop — all  in  good  time,  Mr.  SAnigsby.  I  swerved 
many  years  in  revenue  cutters  and  gentlemen's  yachts. 
When  I  sailed  the  '  Dream '  for  Lord  Blory — oh,  Mr. 
SAnigsby,  that  was  a  man."  Here  Blobb's  feelings  induced 
a  hiccup,  which  accompanied  him  from  that  point.  "  De- 
sAended  of  noble  ancestors,  Mr.  SAnigsby,  his  lordship  was 
a  hindividual  of  the  aristocracy." 

"  Of  course,  Mr.  Blobb,"  said  his  hearer,  shivering  a  little 
in  the  night  air. 

"  And  aboard  of  that  yacht,  Mr.  SAnigsby,  I  contracted 
an  unfortunate  alliansh  with  a  young  'ooman.  We  was  very 
appy  for  a  while,  though  belonging  to  the  lower  orders,  Mr. 
SAnigsby." 


360  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

44  Why  not?"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  philosophically.  "  But 
go  on,  Mr.  Blobb." 

"  That  female,"  said  Blobb,  with  solemnity,  "  is  now  in 
Malta  ;  come  from  Gozo,  where  she  resides." 

"  Well." 

"  Yes,  sir  ;  and  there's  a  very  good  reason  in  England," 
said  Blobb  lowering  his  voice,  "  why  I  can't  have  much  to 
say  to  her." 

Mr.  Snigsby  saw  how  the  case  was,  and  why  Mr.  Blobb 
preferred  sailing  in  the  dead  of  night.  This  was  very  unfor- 
tunate, but  what  was  to  be  done  ?  How  could  he  get  rid 
of  him,  and  get  a  new  skipper  ?" 

He  paced  about  the  deck,  musing.  The  yacht  was  right 
out  at  sea,  floating  lightly  on  over  long  blue  waves.  It  was 
a  clear  moonlight  night ;  all  was  still  in  the  cabins  below, 
where  Mrs.  Snigsby  was  forgetting  her  troubles,  and  Alfred 
his  cares.  Mr.  Blobb  was  perched  at  the  weather  gangway 
gigantically  calm. 

Suddenly,  Mr.  Snigsby  looking  to  windward  saw  a  large 
object  glaring  through  the  night.  He  strained  his  eyes. 
The  moon  glided  out  of  some  thick  clouds  at  the  moment. 
The  light  revealed  a  sail.  It  was  a  brig  with  all  sail  set ; 
her  white  canvas  gleamed  through  the  dusk.  But  there 
was  no  sign  of  life  visible  on  board  her ;  she  held  on  calm, 
silent,  and  relentless  as  fate.  Was  she  the  doomed  vessel 
whose  hell  is  the  eternal  sea,  in  which  the  mariners'  hair  grow- 
eth  gray  at  the  wheel,  as  they  beat  on  evermore  in  storm  and 
calm  with  a  life  as  restless  as  the  water  that  bears  them,  till 
they  are  too  weary  to  speak  to  one  another  any  more — and 
their  garb  is  antiquated,  and  the  casual  mariner  crosseth 
himself  as  he  sees  the  relics  of  a  long  dead  generation  mov- 
ing gloomily  on  their  deck  ?  Was  she  that  mournful  spectre 
of  the  ocean,  the  Phantom  Ship  ?  Mr.  Snigsby  paused  and 
stared.  And  the  vessel  neared  them. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  361 

'Twas  the  "Roarer,"  Captain  Bulrush.  Yea,  'twas  the 
Phantom  Ship  of  the  Mediterranean.  The  captain  slum- 
bered in  the  cot,  and  the  lieutenant  in  the  berth,  and  the 
officer  of  the  watch  in  the  hammock  nettings,  and  the  quar- 
ter-master on  the  gun-slide,  and  the  mariner  at  the  wheel  I 
Steadily  holdeth  she  on,  without  reference  to  the  laws  of 
place,  or  the  decisions  of  the  Admiralty  Court. 

"  H— 11  V  roared  out  Mr.  Blobb,  suddenly.  "  Port  the 
helm  !  What  are  they  at !" 

Mr.  Snigsby  seemed  to  see  a  monster  looming  out  of  the 
darkness  to  swallow  up  his  yacht.  He  shut  his  eyes;  he  heard 
a  crash  forward.  The  brig  had  carried  away  their  jib-boom. 
The  "  Paragon's"  crew  came  running  up,  and  poor  Mr. 
Siiigsby  heard  a  voice  cry  out  in  his  cabin.  The  phantom 
had  glided  on  into  the  darkness.  Mr.  Blobb  was  howling 
over  the  wreck  and  invoking  horrid  vengeance  on  the  cap- 
tain of  the  brig. 

Mr.  Snigsby  ran  down  the  companion,  tumbling  over 
Alfred  at  the  bottom  of  the  ladder.  He  found  Mrs.  Snigsby 
in  high  alarm.  They  deplored  their  nnhappy  position ; 
they  bewailed  their  dependence  on  Blobb. 

Meanwhile  that  officer,  who  was  a  very  good  sailor,  was 
getting  things  put  to  rights  again.  When  the  family  finally 
emerged  in  the  morning,  after  breakfast,  they  found ,  all 
square.  It  was  a  beautiful  day,  and  the  squadron  were 
lying  on  the  green  water  in  a  gigantic  line,  with  glittering 
sails — looking  like  a  row  of  castles  on  the  border  of  an 
immense  prairire. 


362  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 


CHAPTER    Y. 

ABOUT  this  time  the  "affairs  of  Europe77  had,  as  their 
custom  is,  got  into  some  phase  of  embarrassment  which 
required  the  presence  of  a  squadron  in  the  eastern  parts  of 
the  Mediterranean.  I  don't  exactly  remember  the  circum- 
stances. I  believe  that  an  infringement  of  the  Treaty  of 
Adrianople,  joined  to  the  marauding  propensities  of  Grivas, 
completed  by  the  Forte's  withdrawal  of  its  approval  from 
the  Pasha  of  Snobkali,  were  the  leading  causes  of  the  dis- 
turbance. How  these  influenced  each  other,  or,  indeed, 
what  they  meant,  was  not  easy  to  discover.  At  all  events, 
a  squadron  had  to  be  sent  eastward.  A  verbosa  et  grandis 
epistola  came  from  the  admiral  to  the  senior  captains  of  the 
cruising  ships.  It  was  just  the  subject  for  Sir  Booby  Boo- 
ing to  expatiate  upon.  Sir  Booby  had  a  decided  talent  for 
writing  long  dispatches.  The  duller  the  dispatch,  too,  the 
longer  it  always  was — like  a  deep-sea  lead — in  proportion 
as  the  lead  was  heavy,  the  line  was  long  1 

Accordingly  the  Intolerable,  110,  the  Struldbrug,  90,  the 
Yerdant,  frigate,  and  brig  Lotos  separated  from  the  fleet, 
and  made  away  towards  the  Archipelago.  What  more 
natural  than  that  the  Paragon  should  go  with  them  ?  Blobb 
being  asked  whether  he  knew  that  part  of  the  Mediterra- 
nean, replied,  "  like — Alcibiades  1"  That  name  was  a  rem- 
nant of  a  small  store  of  classical  information  which  the 
eccentric  skipper  had  acquired  while  sailing  the  "  Symbol" 
for  a  little  clique  of  Oxford  men,  who  cruised  about  the 
Mediterranean  bewailing  the  Dead  Past.  They  were  a^  sect 
of  little  bilious  pietists,  who  wore  sham  hair-shirts,  were 
always  blaming  the  Greek  Church  for  separating  from 
Rome,  and  had  some  odd  theory  about  the  "  Seven  Candle- 
Sticks."  They  came  home,  wrote  little  poems,  journals,  an4 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  363 

pamphlets,  dedicating  to  each  other  all  round,  and  dating 
"  Feast  of  the  Holy  Block,"  or  "  Eve  of  St.  Kilderkin." 
Harmless  little  sect ! — but  I  am  digressing. 

Mr.  Snigsby,  of  course,  was  highly  anxious  to  see  those 
classic  scenes,  the  history  of  which  had  touched  him  so 
sharply  (as  the  birch  of  his  school  could  have  testified)  in 
his  youth.  Alfred  was  ready  to  go  ;  anything  rather  than 
be  bored  by  Malta,  he  said.  His  mother  was  delighted  to 
think,  as  she  said,  that  he  would  recover  a  free  fancy  in  a 
still  softer  clime.  The  dear,  conventional  old  lady  !  She 
was  always  chewing  the  cud  of  some  melancholy  or  other. 
She  wrote  home  long  letters  to  her  relatives  the  Bibbs, 
informing  them  of  her  state  of  mind,  and  containing  the- 
placidest  conventional  nonsense  about  what  they  saw  and 
did.  She  was,  too,  always  in  extremes.  She  would  write 
of  "  the  great  kindness  of  the  Fattons,"  because  Mrs.  F. 
had  been  kind  enough  to  come  and  eat  her  lunch  with  her  ; 
and  that  "  dear  Christian,"  Mr.  F.,  on  the  strength  of  Mr. 
F.'s  sermons,  which  were  produced  as  a  newspaper  writer 
produces  "  leaders,"  because  it  was  his  profession.  She 
now  dipped  a  little  into  Lord  Byron's  works,  of  which  she 
had  been  wont  to  fight  rather  shy,  and  prepared  for  the 
romance  of  the  East.  So  away  went  the  u  Paragon,"  in 
company  with  the  squadron  ;  and  whenever  there  was  a 
calm  or  light  wind,  Mr.  Snigsby  had  the  honor  of  receiving 
distinguished  company  to  dinner — for  the  Admiral  had  not 
allowed  the  squadron  to  come  into  harbor  before  starting, 
under  pretence  of  the  urgency  of  the  case,  and  the  captains 
of  the  Intolerable  and  Struldbrug  had  fallen  short  of  fowls 

and  vegetables.     In  consequence  of  this,  old ,  of  the 

Intolerable — a  very  knowing  card — sent  one  of  his  boats 
one  morning  to  the  Paragon,  with  his  compliments  and  a 
melon.  Mr.  Snigsby  had  at  least  ten  melons  hanging  up  on 
board,  but  "  how  kind  of  Captain !"  exclaimed  Mrs.  S. : 


304  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

so  the  captain  was  asked  to  come  and  partake  of  his  melon, 
and  he  did  partake  of  it,  and  of  two  bottles  of  Lafitte  into 
the  bargain.  We  may  be  sure  that  Blobb  did  not  approve 
of  these  visits,  and  he  not  unfrequently  took  advantage  of 
night  to  get  five  miles  to  windward  of  the  squadron. 

"They're  as  hinnocent  as  lambs,"  he  said  to  the  crew  of 
the  Snigsbys,  "  as  hinnocent  as  a  Paskill  lamb." 

Whatever  that  phrase  might  mean,  he  acted  a  parental 
part  towards  them,  with  a  gigantic  compassion ;  pointed 
out  the  various  parts  of  the  coast  as  they  came  in  sight  of 
the  Morea  ;  and  showed  Alfred  how  the  never-to-be-forgot- 
ten Lord  Blory  was  wont  to  wear  his  fez.  Of  course  Alfred 
had  now  begun  a  beard  and  moustache,  and  assumed  a  kind 
of  oriental  appearance,  generally.  He  also  cherished  a 
secret  intention  of  going,  in  his  fez,  to  'the  Cyder  Cellars, 
when  he  returned  to  London.  That  would  rather  astonish 
Blow,  he  thought,  and  little  Buck,  the  raffish  actor,  and  all 
the  odd  hangers  on  of  Yauxhall,  the  theatres,  the  casinos, 
the  betting-rooms,  &c.  "  Rather  I"  he  thought.  It  was 
just  the  kind  of  reflection  to  be  full  of  as  you  saw  th^  col- 
umns of  Sunium,  with  the  sunlight  clinging  to  them  at  noon, 
like  a  parasite  ! 

The  squadron — passing  JBgina  with  its  veil  of  blue  haze 
(you  will  find  some  ruins  there,  and  partridges) — arrived  off 
the  Piraeus.  The  Intolerable  and  Struldbrug  anchored  in 
the  Bay  of  Salamis,  dropping  their  best  bowers  among  the 
bones  of  the  followers  of  Xerxes ;  the  Yerdant  and  Lotos 
entered  the  Piraeus,  and  so  did  the  Paragon,  dodging  neatly 
in  between  the  two  little  lamp-posts  in  the  mouth  of  it,  with 
a  slanting  wind.  The  captain  of  the  Intolerable  went  on 
shore  to  consult  the  authorities  of  the  Embassy,  and  returned 
to  his  ship  with  a  serious  expression  on  his  face,  and  an  in- 
creased air  of  self-importance.  He  was  observed  to  nod  his 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  365 

head  gravely  to  the  commander,  who  nodded  his  to  the  lieu- 
tenant of  the  watch  by  and  by,  in  his  turn.  Toadyley — 
who  had  a  talent  for  getting  hold  of  news  like  the  scent  of 
a  truffledog,  though  he  occasionally  got  hold  of  a  toadstool 
instead  of  the  luxurious  fungus — came  down  to  the  gun-room 

with  the  mysterious  self-importance  of  old at  third 

hand.  There  now  began  a  discourse  about  "  British  inter- 
ests," and  danger  to  Otho's  crown. 

"  It's  all  part  of  a  general  movement  of  the  European 
democracy,  sir,"  Toadyley  said.  "  It  will  leave  us  no  insti- 
tutions, by  and  by  1" 

On  this,  Herbert  Flower  remarked  very  gravely,  that 
11  nothing  could  be  more  annoying  to  a  member  of  the  aris- 
tocracy " — with  a  subdued  grin  as  he  coupled  the  last  words 
with  a  glance  at  Toadyley.  For  Toadyley's  reverence  for 
aristocracy  was  undoubtedly  the  result  of  a  pure  and  disin- 
terested (and  snobbish)  attachment.  Happy  aristocracy, 
which,  however  blind  it  may  be,  always  has  a  cur  to  lead 
it ;  to  carry  the  basket,  eat  the  fragments,  and  put  up  with 
the  kicks  I  Toadyley  saw  Mr.  Flower's  intention?  but  said 
nothing.  He  found  that  the  best  plan  of  revenging  himself 
on  his  enemies,  was  to  jog  the  memory  of  the  commander 
about  their  faults  and  misdoings. 

Some  days  passed  ;  it  was  very  fine  weather,  and  there 
was  nothing  particular  to  do.  Mr.  Slides,  the  gunnery  lieu- 
tenant, peering  from  the  poop,  became  gradually  aware  that 
there  was  a  fine  clear  range  for  firing  down  the  bay.  Mr^ 
Slides  was  an  officer  from  the  "  Excellent,"  a  capital  cannon 
shot,  and  a  great  authority  on  shells.  He  was  said  to  have 
once  gone  on  board  a  hulk  while  the  "  Excellent "  was  firing 
shells  at  her,  to  watch  the  effect  on  the  spot.  Stories  were 
told  of  his  seeing  tenpenny  nails  spin  like  tops  on  that  oc- 
casion— stories  which  were  only  believed  by  a  faction,  which 


366  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

thought  Mr.  Slides  "  cracked."  He  hovered  between  two 
strange  reputations  accordingly.  Such  is  the  fortune  of  the 
brave  ! 

Mr.  Slides  stood  on  the  poop,  gazing  on  the  bay  and 
occasionally  glancing  up  at  the  rock  called  "  Xerxes'  Seat," 
and  wondering  what  "elevation"  would  fling  up  a  shot  on 
it.  Presently  he  went  to  the  commander.  I  have  hitherto 

disguised  that  officer  under  a ;  let  me  withdraw  the 

veil.  His  name  was  Bilboes.  Mr.  Slides  observed  that 
there  was  now  an  excellent  opportunity  of  having  a  little 
shell  practice.  Bilboes  screwed  up  his  mouth.  He  was 
one  of  the  old  shool  ;  knew  very  little  of  the  science  of  gun- 
nery, and  was  rather  afraid  of  shells.  Mr.  Slides  urged  him. 
He  wanted  to  make  some  experiments — was  not  quite  sure 
of  the  length  of  his  fuzes.  Now  they  could  fire  alternately 
at  two  points — and  have  somebody  near  them  with  a  watch, 
to  mark  the  moment  of  falling  and  bursting. 

"  But  bless  me,  Mr.  Slides!"  said  the  commander,  "  what's 
somebody  to  do  when  the  shells  fall  near  him  ?" 

"  Get  behind  a  rock  to  be  sure  !"  said  Slides  with  a  superb 
air.  "  Get  behind  a  rock  1"  he  cried  out,  "  unless  he  wants 
his  'ed  knocked  off." 

"  One  of  the  midshipmen,"  suggested  little  Bloaker  the 
marine  officer,  with  a  quiet  smile. 

Toadyley,  who  had  been  within  hearing  all  this  time, 
wriggled  up  to  the  commander. 

"I  beg  pardon  sir,"  he  said  to  him,  "Mr. — ah!  Mr. 
Flower,  sir,  has  not  been  doing  much  lately  !"  Artful  Toady- 
ley. 

"  By  Jove  !  no  ;  call  Mr.  Flower,"  said  old  Bilboes, 
briskly.  "  Yes — we  ought  to  find  out  the  shells — all  about 
the  shells — you're  right,  Slides."  Bilboes  was  wonderfully 
interested  in  the  matter  suddenly. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  367 

Mr.  Herbert  Flower  canie  running  up,  bolting  the  last 
fragment  of  a  lump  of  plum  cake,  "  Want  me,  sir  ?"  There 
was  a  sort  of  grin  in  the  circle  round  Bilboes.  There  was 
a  particular  little  imbecile  grin  about  Bloaker  ;  poor  little 
Bloaker,  who  was  what  Thackeray  calls  "  a  feeble  wag," 
and  was  called  "  wicked,"  by  one  or  two  old  women.  The 
commander  told  Mr.  Flower  what  he  wanted  him  for.  The 
Phenomenon  nodded,  and  held  his  tongue. 

"  Gro  and  get  ready,  then,"  concluded  Bilboes. 

"  I've  no  preparations  to  make,  thank  you  sir,"  said 
Flowers,  quietly.  "  The  estate's  entailed  sir." 

"  What — what  do  you  mean  ?"  said  old  Bilboes. 

"  No  need  of  a  will,  sir ;  goes  to  the  Flowers  of  Herb- 
ham  after  our  line.  Branched  off  in  Anne's  time." 

"  Call  away  the  cutter,  sir,"  said  Bilboes,  "  and  look 
sharp  about  it." 

Mr.  Flower  bounded  off  for  the  purpose,  and  the  com- 
mander ejaculated,  "  Well,  I'm  d — d." 

Meanwhile,  Mr.  Slides  had  gone  down  below  to  get  one 
of  the  main-deck  guns  ready  for  firing.  The  gunner  had 
had  the  keys  of  the  magazine  given  him,  and  presently  be- 
gan marching  with  a  dignified  pace  up  the  hatchway,  carry- 
ing a  shell.  It  is  quite  a  picture  to  see  a  gunner  carrying 
a  shell — the  reverence  and  affection  with  which  he  regards 
the  deadly  object  are  most  interesting  to  observe.  A 
young  woman  carrying  her  baby  ;  a  fast  man  bearing  a  pot 
of  porter,  are  not  more  genially  interested  in  their  respect- 
ive charges.  A  beautiful  attachment — and  surely  a  disin- 
terested one  ;  since  occasionally  now-a-days,  the  shell  ex- 
plodes "  unexpectedly,"  (as  the  subsequent  dispatch  pathe- 
tically remarks,)  and  clears  the  neighborhood  in  a  summary 
manner. 

"Cutter's  manned,  sir,"  Mr.  Flower  said  to  the  com- 
mander. 


368  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;  OR, 

"Very  well ;  now  pull,  sir,  and  land  at  that  point  to  the 
right.  We  are  going  to  fire  alternately  at  that  point,  and 
yon  other  one  to  the  left." 

Flower  was  a  picture  of  respectful  attention. 

"  When  we  hoist  the  red  flag,  we  are  going  to  fire  at 
you—I  mean  at  the  point  on  the  right,"  he  said,  correcting 
himself,  quickly. 

"  Same  thing,  sir,"  struck  in  the  Phenomenon. 

"  Silence,  and  receive  your  orders,  Mr.  Flower.  When 
we  hoist  the  yellow  flag,  we  fire  at  the  point  on  the  left. 
You  attend  with  your  watch,  and  time  the  sounds  of  the 
falling  and  the  bursting." 

Mr.  Flower  ran  down  the  side.     "  Shove  off,"  he  cried. 

The  oars  flashed,  the  wake  shivered,  and  away  went  Mr. 
Flower  on  his  scientific  mission.  He  occupied  himself  in 
looking  at  his  watch,  and  ascertaining  that  it  went  properly, 
and  the  boat  slashed  along  through  the  water — leaving  the 
old  Intolerable  towering  out  of  the  sea  in  the  distance. 

"  We  had  better  warn  that  boat,  sir,"  said  the  coxswain, 
suddenly.  Flower  looked  up.  "  What's  the  matter  ?"  he 
asked. 

They  saw  one  of  the  common  Greek  boats,  with  a  dirty 
sail,  creeping  along  some  way  from  them.  A  fez  just 
gleamed  over  the  quarter,  and  a  light  curl  of  blue  smoke 
hovered  over  it. 

"  Starboard,  and  near  her,"  said  Herbert. 

"  Boat  ahoy,  there  \"    The  fez  started.    "  Hillo,  'Erbertl!" 

«  What— Snigsby !" 

Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  jumped  up.  "  0 — this  is  jolly  Flow- 
er, by  Jove.  I  was  just  going  for  a  little  cruise — beautiful 
day  1"  He  stretched  his  long  figure  with  a  most  joyful  air. 
"  Fll  join  you — are  you  going  to  land  ?" 

"  You  may  if  you  like,"  said  Herbert.     "  Follow  us." 

The  boats  moved  away — Alfred's  following  the  cutter, 


FUN,  FKIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  369 

and  they  soon  reached  the  "  point  to  the  right,"  of  which 
Bilboes  had  spoken.  It  was  a  fine,  long,  rocky  strip  of 
land,  with  shingle  on  both  sides  down  to  the  sea. 

"Now,  shove  off,  coxswain,"  said  Flower.  "Take  the 
shore  boat  with  you — out  of  the  range." 

Alfred  and  Herbert  Flower  were  left  alone  on  the  point. 
Alfred  began  to  peer  about  with  a  curious  look.  If  you 
ever  saw  a  long  bird  of  the  stork  genus,  observing  external 
nature  in  the  strange  way  they  do,  you  have  seen  something 
that  resembles  the  tone  of  Alfred's  walk.  Of  course,  his 
little  box  of  "  magic  lights"  came  out  in  an  instant,  and  he 
offered  Herbert  a  cigar. 

"  You  fellows  have  an  easy  life  of  it,"  said  Alfred, 
"  upon  my  word."  Herbert  was  fiddling  with  his  watch, 
and  observing  the  rocks  about  them.  "Here  you  are — you 
come  ashore — you — "  So  he  was  going  on,  when — sud- 
denly— 

But  we  must  glance  at  the  main-deck  of  the  Intolerable 
for  an  instant.  Slides  was  hovering  round  the  gun,  and 
peering  through  the  port  with  a  telescope.  "  Hang  the 
fellow ! — tell  the  people  to  hoist  the  red  flag  on  deck, 
Jones.  Elevate  ! — well ! — oh  dear.  What's  that  long  col- 
ored thing  moving  ?  Is't  alive  ?" 

"Take  a  cigar,  Herbert,"  said  Alfred.  "I'll  just  run 
and  pick  one  of  those  leaves."  Alfred  galloped  off.  Her- 
bert's eye  was  on  the  Intolerable's  mast-head.  "  Snigsby, 
Snigsby,"  he  roared  out,  "  come  back  for  God's  sake." 

"  D — n  it,  it's  running  !"  said  Slides.  "  Is  the  flag  broke 
on  deck?"  "Yes,  sir,"  was  the  answer.  "Mr.  Flower 
must  see  the  flag" — and  jerk  went  Mr.  Slides'  wrist ;  he 
could  be  tantalized  no  longer. 

A  flash  of  fire,  and  a  white  cloud,  and  a  rolling  thunder 
burst  from  the  Intolerable,  and  then  a  long  thin  hiss  fol- 
lowed through  the  air.  Down  went  Flower,  like  a  pointer, 

16* 


370  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

instanter,  with  a  wild  glance  at  Snigsby.  Snigsby  at  that 
moment  was  a  picture.  He  stood  for  one  instant  like  what 
the  vulgar  call  "  a  stuck  pig" — legs  frozen — mouth  agape. 
And  then  he  dropped  backwards — I  regret  to  say — in 
among  some  furze  and  stones.  The  long  hiss  passed  over 
their  heads  ;  there  was  a  tremendous  splash  in  the  sea  some 
hundred  yards  ahead  of  the  point — a  white  cascade  sprung 
up  from  it  for  an  instant,  and  all  was  still. 

"Alfred  ahoy!"  cried  Flower.  "Yery  pleasant  duty, 
eh?" 

"  Murder,  by  Jove,"  said  Snigsby,  who  was  quite  pale. 
"There's  some  brandy  in  the  boat,  old  fellow.  Let's 
call  'it." 

"  Gad,  I  don't  know  whether  the  boat  ought  to  cross  the 
range  now.  Come  here  by  me."  Herbert  was  dotting 
down  the  minutes  and  seconds  on  a  card  with  a  pencil. 
Always  cool  the  youth  was ;  indeed  he  had  had  a  good 
schooling  in  the  "  Cowslip,"  on  the  Coast,  the  commander 
of  which  was  an  officer  who  occasionally  threatened  to  run 
his  brig  alongside  a  foreign  line-of-battle  ship,  if  anything 
on  the  part  of  the  line-of-battle  ship  had  offended  him. 
This  he  called  "bringing  people  to  their  senses,"  while  other 
authorities  considered  it  a  taking  leave  of  his  own  ! 

"You  are  a  cool  card,  Flower,"  said  Snigsby,  looking 
with  admiration  at  Herbert's  pencil  and  notes. 

Herbert  shrugged  his  shoulders.  "  Oh,  I'm  paid  for  it  ; 
what  do  I  get  my  £30  a  year  for  ?" 

"Ah  but — hang  it,  you  know,"  said  Alfred,  whom  the 
shell  had  made  wonderfully  earnest  all  of  a  sudden,  "it's 
honorable,  old  feller ;  courage  is  a  fine  thing,  and  it's  a 
great  profession  to  rise  in." 

"  Oh,  courage  is  just  a  habit — like  smoking.  The  pro- 
fession's a  bore.  It's  all  humbug,"  said  the  Phenomenon  ; 
"  everything's  humbug." 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  3tl 

Up  went  the  yellow  flag.  "  Keep  your  eye  on  that  point, 
Alfred,"  said  Flower — dropping  adroitly  down  again — 
while  Alfred  tumbled  right  over  him,  and  sprawled  all 
abroad  in  his  anxiety  to  imitate  the  movement.  "All 
right,  man,"  Herbert  said,  half  laughing.  "  It  won't  be  so 
near  us  this  time  1"  He  laughed,  but  he  did  not  sneer  at 
young  Snigsby's  "  funk."  He  thought  no  worse  of  him  for 
it ;  would  have  thought  no  better  of  him  for  the  opposite  ; 
he  neither  loved,  reverenced,  feared,  or  hated,  or  despised 
hardly  at  all  Nil  admirari  was  the  basis  of  his  nature. 
Nil  admirari  is  really  the  motto  of  hundreds  of  our  youth. 
Nil  admirari  will  have  to  be  examined  very  closely  by-and- 
by.  Nil  admirari  will  have  to  be  put  down  by-and-by. 

Again,  the  fire  gleamed  in  the  heart  of  the  white  smoke, 
and  the  air  hissed  like  a  living  thing.  They  saw  a  black 
speck  in  the  air  for  a  second — then  the  "  point  on  the  left" 
glittered  with  momentary  fire,  and  a  whirlwind  of  stones 
and  dust  flew  up. 

One  or  two  more  shells  were  fired  without  any  noticeable 
results.  At  last  one  of  them  began  to  hiss,  prematurely — 
as  one  feels  inclined  to  do  at  a  Bricklesian  drama — while  it 
was  lying  apparently  harmless  on  the  sill  of  the  port. 
Everybody  started.  It  was  instantly  kicked  off  into  the 
sea — where,  luckily,  it  did  not  explode,  but  sunk  peacefully 
into  extinction.  Slides,  of  course,  was  quite  ready  to  "  ac- 
count for"  the  accident.  "Something"  was  wrong  with 
the  "  cap,"  and  there  was  "something"  odd  about  the  fuze- 
He  would  undertake  to  show,  he  said,  that  it  could  not  hap- 
pen to  another ;  but  the  captain  would  have  no  more  shell- 
firing  that  day.  The  "boat's  return"  was  hoisted  to  Mr. 
Flower's  great  delight.  Alfred  remarked  that  he  was  begin- 
ning to  take  an  interest  in  the  practice,  but,  upon  the  whole,  he 
was  not  sorry — I  believe — to  find  that  it  was  over.  Long 
afterwards,  the  jnemory,  of  his  first  sight  of  a  shell  adhered 


372  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;   OR, 

to  him,  and  many  a  time  he  narrated  the  circumstance  to  a 
select  circle,  beginning — "  Flower,  of  the  Intolerable,  and 
I,"  &c.,  and  his  excellent  mother  never  flagged  in  her  shud- 
dering sympathy — nay,  not  even  at  the  twentieth  repetition. 

Alfred  now  came  on  board  the  Intolerable  with  Flower. 
The  commander  received  Flower  with  a  little  more  courtesy 
than  usual,  when  he  read  his  notes.  Of  course,  Herbert 
seized  the  occasion  to  ask  leave  to  go  on  shore. 

"Shore,  shore,"  said  old  Bilboes,  "you  youngsters  think 
of  nothing  but  the  shore.  No  sooner  is  the  anchor  in  the 
ground,  than  you  want  to  be  off." 

Flower  said  nothing.  He  knew  his  man.  Old  B.  had  a 
notion  that  his  forte,  was  sarcasm — so,  if  you  rather  seemed 
to  wince,  the  harmless  old  gentleman  thought  you  were  hurt 
by  his  harmless  old  jocosity,  and  ultimately  relented  from 
his  harmless  old  sternness. 

"  Ah,  you  want  to  see  the  ruins  of  ancient  art,"  said  Bil- 
boes, feeling  that  his  irony  hit  Flower  very  hard  ;  "  well, 
you  may  go." 

Flower  went  off  very  quickly,  indeed,  we  may  be  sure. 
The  apparently  good-natured  mood  of  old  Bilboes  induced 
another  young  gentleman  to  try  his  hand  likewise,  but  the 
fatal  inquiry,  "  whether  his  log  was  written  up?" put  a  stop- 
per—  as  he  afterwards  expressed  it — on  his  expedition. 
That  unhappy  log  !  How  that  log  has  tormented  us  naval 
men  !  How  often  have  we  had  occasion  to  join  with  HO- 
RACE in  imprecations  on 

Te  triste  LIGNUM  te  cadncum 
In  domini  caput  imruerentis ! 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  3T3 


CHAPTER    VI. 

THE  modern  inhabitants  of  Athens — perched  as  they  are 
beside  the  ruins — irresistibly  suggest  to  one  a  camp  of  gyp- 
sies among  the  remains  at  Stonehenge.  The  contrast  is  just 
about  as  great,  and  the  relation  of  modern  to  ancient  there 
quite  as  respectable  ;  or,  if  you  prefer  a  commercial  illustra- 
tion, I  would  compare  the  town  to  an  insolvent  establish- 
ment, into  which  Europe  has  put  King  Otho  as  a  kind  of 
"  man  in  possession."  There  is  a  sort  of  tawdry,  semi-Turk- 
ish, semi-French  seediness  about  those  narrow  streets,  which 
inspires  one  with  profound  melancholy  and  disgust.  There 
is  a  muddy  palm-tree  growing  at  the  entrance  of  the  main 
street  in  a  consumptive  manner — a  false  life,  like  the  life 
round  about ;  and  there  stand  for  ever  and  ever,  brown  and 
ghostly,  the  temples  of  the  old  time,  beside  which  this  said 
life,  with  its  noise,  falsity,  and  pettiness,  goes  bustling  on : 
a  kind  of  wake,  that  life  seems  round  the  noble  death  there— 
a  wretched  wake  over  a  dead  queen. 

They  were  stirring  times  at  Athens  in  184-.  But,  first 
of  all,  let  us  see  our  firiends,  the  Snigsbys,  safely  deposited 
at  the  Hotel  d?  Orient.  The  Paragon,  as  I  have  said,  an- 
chored in  the  Piraeus,  where  there  is  quite  a  gay  little  white 
town.  Two  Russian  brigs,  with  gilt  stars  on  their  gun- 
tompions — that  foreign  dandyism — were  in  the  harbor. 
They  exercised  their  guns  constantly,  the  crew  hallooing 
when  they  loaded,  as  they  drove  the  rammers  in ;  they 
always  loosed  sails,  and  then  furled  them  just  as  the  Lotos 
did  so  ;  and  used  to  beat  the  Lotos  too,  which  was  their 
ambition. 

Mr.  Blobb  and  a  party  from  the  yacht  here  employed 
themselves  in  landing  Mr.  Snigsby's  luggage.  Mr.  Snigsby 
was  surprised  to  see  a  regular  cab-stand,  and  a  fellow  in  a 


314  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

red  cap  and  white  petticoats,  with  a  sash  round  him,  come 
trotting  up  with  a  hackney  coach,  directly  he  landed. 
Blobb  settled  with  him  to  go  to  Athens,  for  so  many 
drachmas.  "  Athens  sir,  yes  sir," — fancy  that !  and  off  the 
coach  rolled,  along  over  a  good  highway  road — flat,  marshy 
plains  stretching  away  on  each  side — pale,  thin  woods  of 
light-green  trees  springing  from  them — barren  Hymettus  on 
one  side — distant  Pentelicus,  looking  misty.  "  The  cabman" 
stopped  presently,  and  Mr.  Snigsby  half  expected,  as  he  put 
his  head  out  of  the  window,  to  find  himself  blockaded  by  a 
row  of  omnibuses  ahead.  They  had  reached  the  "  half-way 
house" — a  bright,  gaudy  little  cafe  on  the  borders  of  the 
wood,  by  the  road-side.  "  The  Socrates'  Arms,  I  suppose  I" 
said  Alfred,  who  was  in  high  spirits,  making  a  joke  in  the 
style  of  Brickies.  Mrs.  Snigsby  laughed,  but  her  husband 
looked  grave. 

"  The  name  of  Socrates  is  too  sacred  for  these  jests," 
said  Mr.  Snigsby,  pompously. 

"  Oh,"  said  Alfred,  sulkily,  "  there's  a  great  deal  of  cant 
talked  about  these  old  fellows  I" 

"  Possibly,  sir,"  said  his  father  with  sternness,  "  but  the 
cant  of  the  Cyder  Cellars  is  worse  1" 

Mr.  Snigsby  was  in  a  rhadamanthine  mood,  as  was  proved 
by  this  speech.  Whenever  that  sarcasm  about  the  C.  C. 
(as  Alfred  would  have  said)  came  out,  Mr.  S.  was  indubi- 
tably sulky.  "  Humph,"  growled  his  heir,  but  I  am  afraid 
the  old  gentleman  had  the  best  of  it !  Meanwhile  the  driver 
was  getting  himself  refreshed,  and  taking  some  red  wine 
among  the  babbling,  gaudy,  thin-waisted  groups  who  basked 
in  the  sun,  on  the  benches  outside,  kicking  out  their  red- 
buskined  legs,  twisting  their  moustachios,  and  gabbling 
three  at  a  time.  Crack  went  the  whip,  and  on  the  coach 
moved.  At  last,  the  road  turned  and  they  approached  the 
town ;  the  Temple  of  Theseus  lying  just  on  the  right.  They 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  375 

rattled  up  the  street  (for  Athens  can  only  be  said  to  have 
one  street)  and  went  straight  to  the  hotel.  They  were  to 
begin  "sight-seeing"  (a  sadly  vulgar  word  that  is)  next 
day.  The  Snigsbys  always  "  did  "  the  curiosities  of  a  place 
on  system,  and  regulated  their  sublime  interest  in  antiquity 
by  the  almanac.  As  these  poor  sketches  of  mine  are  not 
wholly  buffooneries,  but  claim  some  slight  "  purpose,"  I 
think  I  ought  to  subjoin  a  "  Memorandum"  of  Mr.  Snigs- 
by's,  prepared  that  evening.  It  may,  who  knows,  serve  as 
a  hint  to  some  future  traveller  of  lofty  aims.  It  will,  at  all 
events,  illustrate  the  character  of  various  ditto  dittoes. 

MEMORANDUM. 

"  — th  instant.  Breakfast.  Inquire  price  of  tent.  See 
ACROPOLIS,  old  columns,  ruins  Greek  worship,  graceful  Tem- 
ple of  Winds.  Dinner  at  6.  Write  Hugg  and  Bloaker. 

"  — th  instant.  Early  breakfast  (qy.  why  salt  so  dear  at 
Athens  ?)  See  ruins,  temple  Jupiter  Olympius.  Emperor 
Hadrian,  arch  of.  Not  to  forget  Umbrella,  heat  so  great. 
Polytheism,  reflections  on.  Dinner  at  6J. 

" — th  instant.  Breakfast.  Honey  at  ditto,  from  Hy- 
mettus.  (Odd  story  about  Plato  and  bees  in  cradle  ;  fabu- 
lous.) See  Pnyx.  Prison  of  Socrates.  Tomb  of  ditto  ! 
Great  man  ;  opposed  popular  superstitions.  Resemblance 
of  to  passers  of  Reform  Bill.  P.M.  „  Ride  out  in  carriage. 
Letters. 

"  — th  inttant.  Old  stream  of  Ilyssus.  Groves  of  Acad. 
Home  early  to  see  tailor.  Evening — roam  about  St.  Paul's 
Hill : — "  unknown  God."  Home  to  tea. 

" — th  instant.  Off  to  Phalarum  Bay.  Any  snipes  in 
marsh  ?  P.M.  Wander  among  ruins ;  reflections  on. 
DINNER  AT  EMBASSY.  LETTERS." 

The  last  sentence  Mr.  Snigsby  has  put  in  capitals,  for 
reasons  which  he  does  not  explain. 


316  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    op, 

The  Snigsbys  clearly  made  the  most  of  their  time,  if  the 
above  document  is  to  be  relied  upon.  And,  indeed,  they 
seem  to  have  enjoyed  themselves.  The  autograph-book  of 
the  hotel  still  retains  their  names  and  their  testimony  to 
that  effect,  along  with  all  the  miscellaneous  names  and  tes- 
timonies of  that  volume ;  in  which  you  read,  how  Jones 
liked  Attica,  and  Brown  liked  the  hotel, — and  the  execrable 
joke  made  by  Higgs  on  the  words  "fare  and  fowl,"  to  which 
is  subjoined  with  due  signatures  the  announcement  that 
"  three  English  gentlemen  voted  the  writer  of  the  above,  an 
ass."  The  English  leave  the  oddest  possible  relic.s  of  them- 
selves, in  these  parts  of  the  world.  The  French  leave  their 
cookery  and  their  prints  ;  the  Venetians  have  left  architec- 
ture ;  our  travellers  leave  their  autographs  and  petty  jokes. 
Well,  every  one  to  his  taste,  as  the  proverb  says  !  Alfred 
favored  the  very  tomb  of  Socrates  with  his  autograph,  and 
other  names  had  been  before  him. 

"  Antiquities"  being  pretty  well  exhausted,  what  attrac- 
tion had  the  capital  to  offer  ?  There  was  a  court ;  to  be 
sure,  it  was  a  little  one  ;  with  a  little  standing  army,  and 
little  ceremonies  and  snug  little  despotic  ways  of  its  own — 
scarcely  rivalling  a  European  one  in  anything  but  its  debt— 
which  was  highly  respectable  in  amount.  There  was  a  large 
flat  white  palace,  which  I  defy  any  one  to  look  at  without 
wishing  to  stick  bills  on  it.  The  whole  affair  was  worthy 
of  the  city  which  once  boasted  the  Tub  of  Diogenes.  But 
see  the  fate  of  empires  !  Just  as  the  city  has  become  most 
ridiculous,  it  has  got  no  wits  I 

This  last  was  the  remark  at  all  events  of  a  young  English 
gentleman  at  the  table  d'hote  one  day.  There  was  usually  a 
rather  pleasant  party  there — a  quiet  old  Russian  patrician 
who  interested  himself  in  what  everybody  said  and  was  very 
agreeable — a  Greek  gentleman  who  had  been  at  college  at 
Moscow — a  travelling  architect,  and  so  on.  Mr.  Snigsby, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  3ft 

to  do  him  justice,  was  fond  of  conversation.  On  this  occa- 
sion he  pricked  up  his  ears. 

"  Have  you  been  Iftig  in  Athens,  sir  ?"  he  said  to  the 
speaker,  a  perfectly  self-possessed  youth,  who  had  every  ap- 
pearance of  being  a  thorough-paced  traveller. 

"  Came  from  Trieste  yesterday.  I  should  have  been  here 
before,  but  I  was  detained  at  Malta  on  my  way  from  Al- 
giers." 

"  Indeed  1"  said  Mr.  Snigsby.  The  company  generally 
glanced  at  the  speaker,  who  was  just  pouring  some  wine  into 
his  soup,  with  some  curiosity. 

*'  And  how,  sir,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,,  "  does  the  French 
settlement  there  succeed  ?" 

"  They're  getting  on  very  well.  Bugeaud  is  not  looking 
so  well  as  he  used  to  do.  All  these  old  fellows  are  drop- 
ping off.  I  saw  Metternich  in  May ;  his  voice  had  got 
quite  shaky." 

By  this  time  the  entire  table  began  to  confine  its  atten- 
tion to  the  mysterious  stranger.  Mr.  Snigsby  felt  the 
necessity  of  continuing  the  conversation.  The  youth  was 
quite  unconscious  of  anybody's  attention  apparently. 

"  Then,  you  seem  to  like  Athens,  as  you — "  Mr.  Snigsby 
said. 

11 1  like  it?  I  hate  the  little  hole  !  It's  all  very  well 
when  you  come  here  as  a  boy  you  know,  but  it's  keeping  me 
away  from  an  old  chum  that  I  was  to  meet  at  Odessa,  and 
go  home  with." 

"  Hem,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  looking  perplexed  and  scarcely 
knowing  what  to  ask  next.  "  And  shall  we  have  the  plea- 
sure of  your  company  long  ?" 

"  I  hope  not.  It  all  depends  on  what  turn  affairs  take. 
They  say  Katwinkski  i-s  to  be  recalled.  I  don't  feel  sure 
about  it  myself.  Besides,  who  knows,  I  may  have  to  take 
a  passage  to  Trieste  with  King  Otho !" 


378  SWELL   LIFE  AT   SEA;   OR, 

At  this  moment,  Mr.  Herbert  Flower  came  in  bearing  a 
carpet  bag,  which  (between  ourselves)  contained  his  plain 
clothes.  Room  at  the  table  was  ii^tantly  made  for  that 
youth.  No  sooner  did  his  eye  light  on  the  mysterious  one 
than  he  nodded  and  said,  "  Why,  hillo,  Saunders,  I  have 
not  seen  you  since  you  were  at  Lisbon."  Friendly  recogni- 
tion, and  "wining"  instantly  followed.  Mr.  Saunders 
talked  away  more  briskly  than  ever,  told  innumerable  anec- 
dotes, all  about  public  men  of  one  class  or  another,  many 
of  them  bitter  sarcasms  of  public  men  against  each  other. 
The  impression  left  by  the  whole  was,  that  European  poli- 
tics were  just  a  large  selfish  game  played  by  men  more  or 
less  clever  and  unscrupulous,  and  none  of  whom  excited  any 
particular  reverence  in  Mr.  Saunders.  After  dinner  he  took 
a  cigar  out  of  his  case,  and  announced  that  he  was  going 
for  "  a  stroll." 

"Who  is  that?"  inquired  the  Snigsbys,  eagerly,  after  he 
kad  left  the  room. 

Flower  laughed.  "That's  our  own  correspondent,"  he 
said,  and  named  the  journal. 

"  Dear  me,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  reverently.  "  A  most  in- 
telligent young  man  he  seems." 

"  Oh  yes  ;  smart  fellow  enough." 

"I  wonder,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  musingly,  "  what  can  be 
the  matter  here.  Something,  sir,  you  may  depend  !"  he 
added  solemnly.  "I  wonder  if  the  government  are  in  a 
crisis.  Pray,  my  lord,"  here  he  turned  to  the  Russian  no- 
bleman who  was  always  so  polite,  "  do  you  know  anything 
of  the  state  of  politics  here  ?" 

The  Russian  made  a  bland  and  negative  inclination. 
Russians  don't  talk  politics  in  coffee-rooms,  Mr.  Snigsby  ! 
And  indeed  one  reason  that  the  English  are  such  bad  social 
conversors  is,  that  continual  political  talk  spoils  them.  If 
they  were  more  literary  they  would  be  more  elegant. 


FUN,  FPIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  379 

Just  then  a  waiter  summoned  Alfred,  who  disappeared. 
Mrs.  Snigsby  had  gone  up  stairs  to  their  rooms  ;  Mr.  Snigsby 
remained,  musing  over  his  claret.  I  rather  fancy  he  was 
meditating  some  "  speculation,"  and  I  know  that  he  often 
thought  that  this  mere  travelling  without  making  money 
was  very  absurd.  He  turned  to  Herbert  Flower,  who,  in 
political  matters,  was  but  a  sorry  resource.  "What  think 
you,  Flower  ?" 

Herbert  shrugged  the  little  shoulders.  "  I'm  never  in- 
terested in  politics,  my  dear  sir.  Politics,  I  take  to  be  the 
art  of  sending  gentlemen  into  parliament,  or  promoting 
them  in  the  army  and  navy.  My  father  does  our  share  of 
political  business,  for  the  present." 

Mr.  Snigsby  smiled.  "But  have  not  you  heard  how 
things  are  going  on  here,  for  example  ?" 

"  Well,  I  understand  the  king's  dunned,"  said  Herbert, 
laughing,  "  but,  by  gad,  Pm  dunned — only  Pm  not  a  king." 

"Dunned,  sir,  indeed?"  said  Mr/Snigsby,  seriously. 

"Yes,  I  made  rather  a  good  joke  about  it  t'other  day. 
I  said  his  Court  was  an  Insolvent  Court."  Mr.  Snigsby 
grinned. 

How  beautiful  was  this  romance  of  monarchy — how  fine 
a  thing  to  be  a  king  under  Otho's  circumstances  !  But  if, 
for  him,  we  have  no  particular  sympathy,  let  our  chivalry 
give  a  sigh  to  the  lady  of  the  house  of  Oldenburg — with 
the  head  too  fair  for  such  a  crown — sweet  flower  of  beauty 
among  the  ruins  of  the  beauty  of  old, — whose  presence 
might  compensate  an  Athenian  for  the  loss  of  the  marbles 
that  charmed  Pericles. 

Just  as  they  were  sitting  silent,  in  rushed  the  waiter, 
flourishing  a  napkin.  "  Come  out  and  look,  sir.  Come  out, 
sir  1"  And  a  distant  sound  of  voices,  and  the  hurrying  hoofs 
of  horses,  were  heard  through  the  open  doors  of  the  hotel. 

Mr.  Snigsby,  with  true  political  curiosity,  bounded  to  his 


380  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

feet  and  rushed, out  accordingly.  The  hotel  was  in  an  up- 
roar. The  residents  were  running  down  stairs  ;  everybody 
asking  his  neighbor  what  was  the  matter.  Nobody  could 
answer  with  certainty.  Only  it  was  quite  clear  in  the  fresh 
and  moonlight  evening,  that  the  people  of  the  town  were 
all  swarming  in  crowds — that  the  picturesque  groups  were 
marching  along  towards  the  palace — that  lights  were  gleam- 
ing now  and  then  through  its  lofty  windows. 

Mr.  Snigsby  came  running  into  the  coffee-room  again, 
quite  excited.  "  It's  a  REVOLUTION,  Mr.  Flower." 

"  Is  it  ?"  said  Flower.  "  Then,  waiter,  bring  another  pint 
of  claret  and  a  cigar." 

"  Won't  you  come  and  look  at  it  ?"  said  Mr.  Snigsby  in 
surprise. 

"  I  ?  bless  you  ;  no.     Mind,  waiter,  the  Lafitte." 

While  the  waiter  was  attending  to  the  order  of  Mr. 
Flower,  our  friend  Snigsby  ran  out  again.  The  Hotel 
dj  Orient  is  situated  near  the  palace,  and  the  residents  had 
a  capital  view  of  the  proceedings  that  night.  The  crowds 
continued  gathering,  and  now  they  gradually  swelled  into  a 
mass  round  the  palace.  And  now  began  shouts — discord- 
ant, tempestuous  hubbub  round  these  white  marble  walls. 
Presently,  a  horseman  leaves  the  palace  portico  at  a  gallop 
— gallops  down  to  the  Artillery  Barracks.  Brief  reply  is 
given  to  the  message  ;  "  Artillery  decline  to  act  1"  In- 
creased hubbub  follows,  as  the  news  is  diffused  through  the 
mob.  And  now  begins  a  general  yelling — indicative,  as  is 
explained  to  Mr.  Snigsby,  (who  is  watching  the  proceedings 
with  high  constitutional  emotions  from  a  balcony,)  that  the 
people  of  Athens  would  like  to  see  his  Majesty  at  his  bal- 
cony !  You  have  heard  the  call  for  "  author,"  raised  by  a 
literary  gentleman's  acquaintances  at  the  close  of  a  new 
play  !  Such  was  the  yelling  for  his  Majesty  on  the  present 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  381 

occasion  ;  they  always  call  on  kings,  however,  to  have  their 
performances  condemned. 

And  now  the  lights  moved  even  more  restlessly  at  the 
windows  of  those  wide  white  walls.  Figures  appear  and 
vanish  there  occasionally.  Mr.  Snigsby's  emotions  became 
immense.  He  half  knocked  down  a  waiter,  whom  he  met 
carrying  a  lantern — as  he  rushed  to  summon  Flower  again. 

"  Come,  Mr.  Flower — come !  Listen  to  the  roaring 
there  1" 

"  Capital  Lafitte,  my  dear  sir,"  said  Herbert,  never  mov- 
ing an  inch. 

"  Come  out  and  see  it,  man,"  said  old  Snigsby. 

"Bah,  my  dear  sir — leave  my  wine?" 

Snigsby  hurried  off  again,,  and  resumed  his  observation. 

"  Mr.  Snigsby,  sir,"  cried  the  waiter. 

The  old  boy  ran  down  once  more.  There  was  some  hub- 
bub going  on  at  the  door  of  the  hotel.  A  lanky  Albanian 
— so  he  seemed — was  hustled  rudely  in  by  an  armed  mob. 
His  cap  fell  off,  and  Mr.  Snigsby  recognised  Alfred. 

"  Why — what  the  devil's  up  now  ?"  he  roared  out  to  that 
youth. 

"  I  just  went  out,"  stammered  Alfred,  who  was  deadly 
pale. 

" In  that  dress,  sir ?"  shouted  his  father.  "Go  to  bed, 
sir.  Waiter,  show  him  to  bed !" 

Once  more,  Mr.  Snigsby  gained  his  point  of  observation. 
The  tumult  was  decidedly  increasing — nay,  arms  of  various 
kinds  glittered  more  prominently  in  the  moonlight.  The 
opening  on  the  royal  balcony  began  to  move.  Who  shall 
describe  all  the  anxiety  and  terror  going  on  within  these 
walls  then  ?  Honor  to  the  queenly  heart,  warm  with  the 
blood  of  Gustavus — which  is  true  to  one  at  this  hour — true 
at  once  to  the  honor  of  its  noble  Northern  birth,  and  the 
Greek  site  of  its  Southern  palace ! 


382  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

A  figure  appears  on  the  balcony,  and  there  is  a  dead  hush 
for  a  moment — and  a  low  murmur.  The  king  ?  No !  A 
burst  of  yelling  follows.  This  is  a  grim  Bavarian — most 
unpopular  man  in  Greece  I  The  muskets  gleamed  still 
more  prominently.  Dense  roaring  ensues. 

"  I  wonder,  sir,  you  dare  show  yourself  I"  roars  stern  old 

,  who  heads  the  multitude.  The  grim  figure  retires  in 

again — cursing  rather  deeply,  we  may  imagine. 

At  last,  the  king  appears.  There  is  a  shouting,  and  a 
cry  about  "constitution,"  and  the  negotiation,  and  three 
times  three.  And  the  mob  slowly  disperses  and  settles 
down  in  its  own  dwellings. 

"  Well,"  said  Mr.  Snigsby,  returning  to  the  coffee-room, 
"  I  call  that  a  great  spectacle  I  Vox  populi,  sir  !" 

"  Now  then  ;  sup,"  said  Flower,  finishing  his  second  cigar. 
"  The  Revolution  has  not  spoiled  my  Lafitte." 

"  Here's  the  people  !"  said  old  Snigsby,  joyously. 

"  Vivat  Regina  /"  said  Flower,  with  gallantry.  Alfred 
was  already  in  bed.  His  first  "  lark"  had  terminated  very 
sadly  in  the  classical  city. 

A  few  days  afterwards,  the  Paragon  slowly  dropped  out 
of  the  harbor,  bearing  the  Snigsbys  for  a  slight  cruise  among 
the  islands. 


CHAPTER    VII. 

DIPLOMACY  is  like  a  funeral.  It  invests  everybody  en- 
gaged in  it  with  an  air  of  sacred  importance  for  the  time. 
Reflect  on  this,  reader,  and  you  will  see  that  it  is  unusually 
true  for  an  epigram.  Doth  not  poor  Hobbins,  slowly 
marching  with  his  black  wand,  look  a  loftier  creature  than 
his  brother  plebeian  ?  Even  so  our  friends  at  embassies 
seem  great  men  from  their  occupation  ;  and  naval  captains 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND    YACHTING.  383 

become  so,  of  course,  when  diplomatic  duties  devolve  on 
them.  The  captain  of  the  "  Intolerable,"  for  example,  was 
twice  the  man,  at  least,  when  visiting  a  consul  in  the  Archi- 
pelago on  political  business.  The  captain  of  the  "  Verdant" 
landed  an  armed  party  to  call  the  Pasha  of  Snobkali  to  ac- 
count for  an  insult  to  the  British  flag,  and  made  the  Pasha 
apologize.  Yet  the  captain  of  the  "  Yerdant"  was  not  per- 
sonally an  important  man !  Intrinsically,  indeed,  he  was 
Adam  Jones,  R.  N.,  with  scarcely  talent  enough  to  manage 
a  country  post-office.  Beautiful  system,  which  "  ennobles 
whatever  it  touches  !"  Were  "  British  interests"  injured  by 
the  revolution  in  my  last  chapter  ?  Not  at  all ;  British  in- 
terests remained  perfectly  safe,  and  dined  together  as  com- 
fortably as  ever  the  day  after.  Of  course  the  captain  of  the 
"  Intolerable"  felt  that  he,  as  senior  officer  of  the  squadron, 
was  the  cause  of  this  happy  state  of  things,  and  Toadyley, 
the  mate,  explained  the  same  in  the  gun-room.  Oddly 
enough,  this  disinterested  admirer  of  his  captain  happened 
to  do  so  in  the  hearing  of  the  gun-room  steward,  who  hap- 
pened to  tell  it  to  the  captain's  steward,  who  happened  to 
tell  it  to  the  captain.  Toadyley  was  a  man  to  "  get  on, 
sir,"  as  old  officers  were  wont  to  say.  He  rose  by  the  pos- 
session of  certain  qualities,  which  irreverent  fellows  like  his 
messmates  did  not  appreciate.  Short-sighted  observers  ! 
What  enableth  the  ape  to  maintain  himself  high  up  on 
trees  ?  His  prehensile  tail !  Nature  is  rich. 

These  preliminary  observations  will  give  the  reader  to  un- 
derstand that  the  scene  of  our  story  is  still  classic.  The 
"  Paragon,"  after  cruising  for  a  little  while  in  the  islands, 
returned  to  the  Piraeus.  Mr.  Snigsby,  whose  interest  as  a 
politician  in  the  revolution  had  been  naturally  very  great, 
was  glad  to  learn  that  the  king  had  accepted  a  constitution. 
It  was  pleasant  to  him  to  see  the  regular  old  political  busi- 
ness going  forward  in  the  old  way.  The  king  not  being  fit 


384  SWELL   LIFE    AT    SEA;    OR, 

for  a  king,  why,  of  course,  he  must  have  one  or  two  more 
imbecile  people  to  help  him,  and  so  everything  would  come 
right.  Frequently  Mr.  Snigsby  broached  the  cheerful  sub- 
ject at  the  talk  d'hote,  the  Russian  bowing  silently  in  answer 
to  his  remarks  as  usual.  The  "own  correspondent"  had 
gone  to  Odessa,  and  was  charming  the  subscribers  from  that 
quarter.  Little  did  these  subscribers  know  that  the  active 
fellow  was  the  same  man  who  (aided  by  the  Mediterranean 
papers)  charmed  them  at  the  same  time  from  Algiers  and 
Beyrout  I  Alfred  had  kept  very  quiet  since  his  latest  ad- 
venture, the  particulars  of  which  were  indeed  sufficiently 
ludicrous.  It  seems  that  he  had  assumed  the  Albanian 
dress  on  the  evening  of  the  revolution,  and  gone  forth  on  an 
Attic  "  lark."  The  partiality  of  the  disciples  of  Brickies  to 
fancy  dresses  is  well  known  ;  they  are  the  male  "Bloomers" 
of  the  age  in  their  tastes ;  and  Alfred  sallied  forth  on  this 
occasion  in  no  ordinary  spirits.  Being  addressed  in  the 
Greek  tongue  in  the  Cafe  de  VEurope,  he  rejoiced  in  the 
opportunity  of  "  chaffing"  a  nation  in  a  language  which, 
though  known  about  the  "  coal-hole,"  and  other  similar 
neighborhoods,  had  not  as  yet  (though  I  doubt  not  it  will, 
the  "  fast"  schoolmaster  being  abroad)  become  familiar  to 
the  inhabitants  of  the  East.  The  result  was  a  row,  and 
that  hustling  of  the  youth  into  his  hotel,  previously  de- 
scribed. Perhaps  the  person  who  felt  dullest  about  this 
time,  of  the  party,  was  Mrs.  Snigsby,  who  had  no  society. 
The  English  people  abroad  always  assume  brevet  social 
rank,  and  cut  their  proper  equals  if  they  get  a  chance.  So 
the  Sempsters  (Mrs.  Sempster's  father  being  a  cadet  of  the 
Highlow  family,  as  Sempster's  family  know  well) — the 
Sempsters,  of  their  own  Bustle  Square,  went  to  the  Etran- 
gers  when  they  heard  the  Snigsbys  were  at  L?  Orient — 
picked  out  the  same  day  to  go  to  Eleusis,  that  the  Snigbys 
chose  for  going  to  Marathon,  and  somehow  were  always, 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  385 

during  their  walks,  on  the  otfor  side  of  the  Acropolis,  One 
would  have  expected  the  respective  youths,  Alfred  and 
Highlow  Sempster,  to  fraternize.  But  Highlow,  though 
"fast,''  was  that  melancholy  variety  of  the  fast  tribe — a 
fast  Prig.  Does  the  reader  know  this  order  of  young 
fellows — solemn,  conceited  little  sinners — grave,  pompous 
reprobates — fellows,  as  Fontenoy  once  said  to  me  in  his  sav- 
age way,  who  "  voluntarily  associate  with  the  devil,  and  yet 
seem  to  feel  that  they  are  patronizing  him  !"  Highlow  was 
one  of  these,  then,  while  Alfred  was  really  a  good  fellow  at 
bottom ;  he  loved  to  write  to  a  prize-fighter,  and  seal  with 
the  Highlow  shield,  not  knowing,  as  connoisseurs  in  heraldry 
do,  that  he  had  no  right  to  use  his  mother's  arms,  his  father 
not  having  any.  Such  was  the  youthful  Sempster,  who  has 
since  sat  for  a  borough,  and  married  into  a  government 
office  under  the  auspices  of  old  Riprigger,  who  gives  young 
gentlemen  situations,  on  condition  of  their  taking  one  of  his 
daughters  into  the  bargain.  A  more  determined  aristocrat 
than  Sempster  does  not  of  course  exist  now ;  for  in  our 
times  Mammon  is  the  most  bigoted  of  all  aristocrats.  If 
you  want  to  boast  of  youf  "  blue  blood,"  do  it  in  the  com- 
pany of  men  of  fortune,  whose  grandfathers  were  trades- 
men. 

Mr.  Snigsby  had  made  np  his  mind  to  leave  Athens,  and 
his  final  preparations  for  sea  were  being  made  on  board  the 
yacht,  under  the  auspices  of  Blobb,  when  our  friend  had  an 
opportunity  of  seeing  a  political  spectacle.  It  must  have 
been  gratifying  to  a  constitutional  heart.  In  a  word,  the 
king's  friends  were  leaving  for  Trieste  in  a  steamer,  escorted 
to  the  very  water's  edge  by  cavalry,  to  save  them  from 
"  popular  fury !"  Popular  fury,  or  the  "  rage  of  the  rab- 
ble" (so  described  by  Brigg  the  attache — himself,  of  course, 
being  sprung  from  emperors)  accompanied  the  fugitives  to 
the  harbor.  Rarely  has  a  more  dignified  spectacle  been 

17 


386  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OK, 

presented  to  observation.  That  a  king  should  be  obliged 
to  send  away  his  companions,  and  to  have  them  cheerfully 
pelted  with  mud  by  his  loyal  subjects  !  Why,  one  would 
rather  act  the  king  in  a  country  barn  !  Indeed,  being  a 
king  of  Otho's  class  is  very  like  following  the  theatrical 
profession,  and  doing  the  royal  parts.  The  poor  monarch 
was  criticised  in  the  newspapers  like  any  stroller,  hissed  by 
the  public,  and  short  of  money  into  the  bargain  !  Mr. 
Snigsby  pitied  him  heartily  as  the  "Paragon"  left  the  har- 
bor in  the  Trieste  steamer's  wake,  and  he  saw  the  sulky 
mustachioed  gentlemen  on  the  poop  looking  very  fierce,  yet 
not  sorry  to  be  out  of  harm's  way.  What  became  of  these 
courtiers  he  never  afterwards  heard  ;  he  supposed  they  went 
to  some  other  court,  and  doubtless  they  are  hanging  about 
one  to  this  hour,  sneering  at  the  "  people" — and  living  on 
them. 

The  Squadron  were  still  in  the  bay  of  Salamis.  Mr. 
Snigsby's  party  went  on  board  the  "  Intolerable"  to  bid 
them  good  bye  there.  We  must  fancy  an  affectionate  part- 
ing between  the  commander  and  Mr.  Snigsby,  accompanied 
by  a  request  from  old  Bilboes  that  he  would  take  down  a 
huge  chest  of  drawers  to  Malta  for  him,  and  accompany 
Alfred,  who  is  looking  for  Herbert  Flower. 

"Mr.  Flower,  sir?" — "  On  the  poop,"  said  the  quarter- 
master. 

Alfred  ascended  the  ladder  leading  to  that  domain,  and 
found  Herbert  pacing  about  there.  There  was  an  air  of 
calm,  yet  satirical  endurance  about  him. 

"  Well,  'Erbert,  we're  going  to  Malta.  Come  down  and 
have  a  chat  for  a  minute." 

"  Hem  !"  said  Herbert. 

"Why,  what's  the  matter?" 

"  I  can't  exactly  leave  the  poop  at  this  minute.  (Stand 
between  me  and  old  Bilboes  a  moment — there.)  The  fact 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  387 

is,  I'm  ordered  to  walk  the  poop  by  that  old  villain ;  but 
there's  a  pocket-pistol  in  that  fire-bucket." 

Alfred  gave  a  demonstration  of  sympathy. 

"Pooh!  my  dear  fellow,  the  temporary  triumph  of  the 
obscure  !  no  more  !  A  mere  result  of  temporary  suprem- 
acy. A  similar  thing  happened  to  Sir  Ralph  Flower  in 
Charles's  time,  when  the  Roundheads  were  uppermost." 
Herbert  looked  magnificently  calm. 

"  Really,  Pm  very  sorry,"  said  the  affectionate  Alfred. 

"  Never  mind.  Everything  in  this  world  fluctuates.  The 
world,  sir,  as  old  Mehemet  Ali  loves  to  remark,  is  a  wheel. 
And  our  world  here  is  a  cart-wheel." 

They  paced  aft,  and  Herbert  explained  how  this  punish- 
ment had  befallen  him.  Rarely  do  we  meet  with  a  more 
monstrous  case.  Herbert's  dog  having  fallen  overboard, 
Herbert  had  let  go  the  life-buoy  ;  and  for  this  Bilboes  had 
doomed  him  for  a  time  to  walk  the  poop ! 
•  "  So  you  are  going  to  Malta?"  Here  Herbert  mused  a 
minute,  and  then  said,  "  Well,  I  heard  you  were  likely  to 
go ;  so  I  have  a  letter  for  you  to  take,  if  you  will." 

"  Delighted,"  said  Alfred. 

The  quartermaster  was  privately  dsipatched  to  the  gun- 
room, and  presently  returned  with  a  note,  very  neat  in  ap- 
pearance, sealed  with  the  magic  roses,  and  addressed  to 
Miss  Beddoes. 

Alfred  looked  so  knowing  when  he  saw  the  direction ! 

"  Don't  you  remember  the  girl  you  danced  with  on  board 
here?" 

"  To  be  sure,"  Alfred  said,  digging  him  playfully  in  the 
ribs. 

"  Well,  didn't  you  think  she  was  jolly  good-looking  ?" 

"  I  did,  indeed,"  the  youth  replied,  with  the  same  know- 
ing look.  Herbert  smiled  in  a  queer,  quiet  way. 

"  Just  call  when  you  arrive,  and  give  her  that  then,"  he 


388  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

said.  Alfred  placed  it  most  sacredly  in  his  pocket,  and  felt 
quite  proud  of  the  mission.  It  was  drawing  near  the  time 
of  departure  now.  Alfred,  with  all  his  "fastness,"  never 
could  get  rid  of  that  softness  of  temperament,  which  he 
affected  to  attribute  reproachfully  to  that  hateful  abstrac- 
tion— the  "spoon."  He  grasped  his  friend's  hand  roman- 
tically. "  Good-bye,  old  feller  !  I'm  obliged  for  all  your 
kindness." 

"  Stuff,  my  boy,"  said  Flower  ;  "  that's  the  sort  of  thing 
one  says  to  one's  schoolmaster  at  the  end  of  a  half.  I've 
not  been  kind  to  you.  Pooh,  pooh  !"  he  continued,  seeing 
that  Alfred  was  about  to  protest,  and  putting  his  hand  over 
his  mouth. 

"  Yacht's  boat's  manned,  sir,"  cried  a  voice  from  the 
gangway. 

"  Take  care  of  yourself,  and  don't  forget  the  letter." 

"Ah!  Flower,"  said  Alfred,  "you  affect  to  hide  those 
em—" 

"Bless  us,  Snigsby,"  said  Herbert,  "you  should  leave 
'hint,  ilia  lachryma?  to  the  Commons.  You  had  better 
take  some  saltpetre  to  sea — a  capital  thing  to  cool  wine 
when  you  can't  get  ice  !  And,  I  say,  tell  Muir  to  send  up 
George  Sand's  Consudo  by  the  Brickbat,  and  make " 

"  Walk  the  poop,  sir  !"  was  the  stern  and  brief  sentence 
from  Bilboes,  which  cut  short  Herbert  Flower's  farewell. 
He  turned  away  to  pace  backwards  and  forwards  as  preten- 
tiously as  did  ever  Sir  Ralph  Flower  himself,  and  the 
Snigsbys  got  into  their  boat,  the  good  lady  of  that  name 
having  given  many  thanks  for  his  "  kindness"  to  the  cap- 
tain of  the  "  Intolerable,"  who  had  been  kind  enough  to 
dine  with  them  so  often.  Possibly  we  shall  never  be  able 
to  approximate  to  anything  like  a  just  admeasurement  of 
obligations  in  this  world.  People's  notions  vary  so  I  There 
was  Jack  Pitt  of  the  Lucifer : — could  mortal  man  have 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  389 

been  more  cordially  treated  than  Jack  was,  by  the  consul  at 
Snobkali  ?  Yet  the  recollection  of  the  dissolution  of  that 
friendship  is  fresh  in  my  memory.  Jack's  words  yet  occa- 
sionally haunt  my  ears  :  "  He  thinks,"  said  the  worthy 
lieutenant,  speaking  of  that  consul's  recent  misconduct,  and 
red  in  the  face — "  he  thinks,  because  I  eat  his  dinners,  and 
dine  at  his  house,  and  ride  his  horses — he  thinks,  sir,  that 
he  is  to  call  me  Jack  /" 

The  sails  were  loosed,  the  anchor  up ;  the  Paragon 
dropped  away  to  sea,  glimmering  like  a  star  along  the  coast, 
getting  a  "  clean  bill  of  health"  at  Cerigo,  and  moving  on 
towards  Malta.  The  autumn  was  very  fast  departing  by 
this  time,  and  Mr.  Snigsby  longed  to  return  to  England. 
That  that  country  was  undoubtedly  the  best  in  the  long  run 
he  frequently  asseverated  now ;  and  reminded  his  family 
that  they  had  now  seen  a  good  deal  of  the  world,  and  that, 
as  to  Alfred  in  particular,  it  was  time  for  him  to  be  "  settling 
down'7 — a  favorite  phrase  of  his.  And  certainly  it  is  a 
happy  phrase — though,  of  course,  the  value  of  anything  in 
the  "  settled-down"  condition  depends  on  the  nature  of  the 
mixture.  Gooseberry  and  champagne  both  effervesce,  but 
the  settling  down  leaves  different  results  ;  notwithstanding 
the  general  notion  that  the  wildness  of  youth  is  pretty 
much  the  same  thing  in  all  youths.  Alfred  listened  very 
reasonably  to  the  parental  admonitions  by  this  time,  occu- 
pying himself  in  the  afternoon,  as  the  yacht  drifted  along, 
in  arranging  his  various  purchases — his  sabres  and  daggers, 
and  caps,  and  pipes,  all  which  he  destined  to  his  future 
"chambers;"  for  a  secret,  dearly-cherished  feeling  lurked 
in  Alfred's  breast — a  determination  to  have  "chambers'' 
when  he  returned  to  England,  and  to  keep  himself  clear 
from  the  parental  control  for  the  future.  A  hoary  moralist 
delights — and  there  is  ground  for  the  reflection — to  comment 
on  the  little  sympathy  that  exists  between  fathers  and  sons 


390  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

in  the  present  age  ;  but  if  an  old. gentleman  has  no  princi- 
ples nor  faith  of  his  own,  how  can  he  expect  his  son  to 
value  anything  about  him  but  his  money  ?  Show  me  a 
youth  who  don't  value  that,  and  I  will  admit  that  our  youth 
are  degenerate,  as  compared  with  their  papas. 

In  due  time,  Malta  gleamed  along  the  surface  of  the  wa- 
ter, white  and  low,  like  a  dumpling  in  a  pot.  The  Snigsbys 
thought  they  would  sail  briskly  in,  in  the  fine  part  of  the 
day.  But  they  did  not'  know  how  it  was — though  Blobb 
did — that  the  yacht  reached  in  at  night.  It  was  too  late 
to  go  on  shore  then,  and  in  the  morning  Mr.  Blobb  was  ab- 
sent. Snigsby  remembered  the  mysterious  sailing  on  the 
occasion  of  their  leaving  for  the  Archipelago,  and  felt  a  dim 
apprehension  of  some  calamity  ;  but  in  the  meantime  they 
established  themselves  once  more  at  the  old  rooms  in  Strada 
Keale.  The  island  was  dull  at  this  time,  and  most  of  the 
squadron  away — those  commanded  by  people  of  " interest7' 
dawdling  about  the  Ionian  islands — the  working  and  obscure 
ones,  on  the  contrary,  were  at  such  places  as  Beyrout  or 
Tunis ;  while  the  admiral,  in  command  of  all,  was  snug  in 
his  house  on  shore,  in  a  kind  of  seedy  tranquillity,  if  the 
phrase  be  intelligible.  Sir  Booby  Booing  was  a  good  judge 
of  value.  He  was  lavish  of  his  intellect — in  dispatches  and 
orders — but  very  sparing  with  his  table-money  1  He  knew 
the  worth  of  things — "  he  did,"  as  Lieutenant  Hireling 
would  say  ;  and  he  did  not  patronize  society  much,  chiefly 
that  of  wandering  people  of  rank,  who  make  a  convenience 
of  the  public  authorities,  getting  passages  in  men-of-war  from 
them,  and  patronizing  their  families,  and  cutting  them  after- 
wards in  England,  in  the  regular  hackneyed  old  way. 

Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  arrayed  himself,  the  next  morning 
after  their  arrival,  in  his  most  sumptuous  style.  He  was 
going  to  call  at  the  quiet  respectable  lodgings  of  Captain 
Beddoes,  where  dwelt  the  fair  Lucy,  and  the  captain's  maiden 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  391 

sister,  an  old  lady  of  reading  and  sewing  propensities.  The 
captain  was  away  at  the  club ;  and  Alfred,  who  walked  up 
stairs  in  some  perturbation,  found  there  Lucy  by  herself, 
looking  fresh,  white  and  trim  as  a  camellia.  The  favorite 
ideal  lady  of  a  "  Bricklesian "  is  a  smart  damsel,  well  ac- 
quainted with  light  literature,  something  of  a  flirt  in  her 
manners,  and  tant  soil  pen  of  a  "snob"  in  her  feelings. 
Lucy,  however,  was  a  quiet  little  girl,  with  just  enough  sen- 
timent to  sadden  her,  whose  perception  of  fun  was  rather  a 
matter  of  heart-sympathy  than  of  acuteness,  (and  so  more 
akin  to  genius,)  and  who,  brought  up  always  in  the  pecnliar 
worldly  atmosphere  of  garrison  life,  was  worldly  and  ortho- 
dox from  timidity  somewhat,  A  spoiled  high  character,  to 
meet  which  (as  you  do  constantly)  has  an  effect  h'ke  drop- 
ping on  a  flower  used  as  a  marker  in  a  heavy  materialist 
volume  ! 

How  much  depends  on  natural  good  feeling  !  Hireling, 
above  mentioned,  (formerly  of  H.  M.  Brig  SNOB,)  Hire- 
ling, I  say,  deputed,  once,  to  report  to  his  commander  the 
news  of  the  death  of  his  nearest  relative,  did  it  thus :  put- 
ting his  head  inside  the  cabin  door, — "  Come  on  board,  sir," 
said  he,  "  your  father's  dead." 

Alfred's  obvious  good  feeling  was  in  his  favor.  Lucy  was 
up,  and  said  she  was  glad  to  see  him.  Alfred  envied  Her- 
bert Flower. 

"  Let  me  see,"  he  began,  after  remarking  that  Malta  was 
dull,  "  IVe  a  note  for  you  from  Herbert  Flower,"  and  he 
produced  it. 

"  Oh,"  said  Lucy,  "I  hope  he's  well.  Does  he  keep  on 
good  terms  with  his  commander,  now  ?" 

She  played  with  the  note,  and  glanced  at  the  seal,  as  if 
la  uihing  at  Mr.  Flower's  profusion  of  armorial  wax.  Alfred 
thought  he  ought  to  say  good  morning.  How  anxious  she 
must  be  to  read  it  !  He  rose  up. 


392  SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA  ;   OR, 

"  Oh,  don't  hurry,  Mr.  Snigsby :  I  expect  my  father  in 
every  moment,"  said  Lucy,  putting  down  the  &till  unopened 
note ;  and  she  began  to  talk  about  all  the  most  lively  sub- 
jects of  the  day.  At  last,  however,  Alfred  felt — the  cap- 
tain still  not  having  arrived — that  he  really  ought  to  go  ; 
but  he  found  he  was  wonderfully  more  at  ease  with  the 
young  lady  than  before.  The  chat  was  very  lively,  just  as 
he  was  saying  good  morning. 

"  So,  Herbert  still  occasionally  excites  the  captainrs 
wrath,"  Lucy  said,  laughing. 

"  Oh,  yes ;  perhaps  Commander  Bilboes  is  jealous  of  him," 
said  Alfred,  gallantly, 

"Of  his  high-flown  names  of  kinsmen,  and  his  ancestral 
roses,  as  he  calls  them  ?"  Lucy  laughed  again,  and  looked 
at  the  seal. 

"  Of  the,  rose,  perhaps,7' said  Alfred,  bowing,  and  inwardly 
wishing  that  he  was  dressed  as  Don  Caesar  de  Bazan — his 
favorite  ideal. 

Lucy  blushed  and  looked  demure.  ' "  Oh,  Herberts  heart, 
like  his  shield,  holds  a  whole  bouquet  of  them.  You're  mis- 
taken about  him.  I  think  you  have  been  deluded  by  your 
own  chivalry  there,  Mr.  Snigsby." 

Lucy  giggled  as  she  spoke,  but  her  blush  was  earnest ; 
and  she  meant  it  to  be  so. 

"  Well,  I  must  bid  you  good  morning.  I  shall  hope  to 
find  the  captain  in,  again/' 

"  He  will  be  very  glad  to  see  you,"  said  Lucy. 

"  Good  morning." 

"  Good  bye,  Mr.  Snigsby." 

The  drawing-room  door  closed ;  Alfred's  foot  resounded 
on  the  stair ;  Luoy  seized  the  letter,  and  listened  :  the  street 
door  resounded  hollowly.  The  wax  cracked  in  an  instant, 
and  she  began  to  read. 

Will  our  story  be  declared  improbable  for  communicating 


Fux,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  393 

the  pnrport  of  Mr.  Herbert  Flower's  note  ?  How  Alfred's 
heart  would  have  beat,  if  he  had  known  that  it  was  a  kind 
dof  sentimental  letter  of  credit  for  him,  wherein  Flower  had 
favorably  commended  him  to  his  young  friend — the  Lucy 
with  whom  he  had  flirted  from  childhood — as  a  very  promis- 
ing match. 

"You  see,  Lucy  dear,"  said  the  youth's  note,  "sentiment 
reminds  me,  sometimes,  though  I  don't  deal  much  in  meta- 
phors, of  perfumes.  People  don't  use  perfumes,  unless  they 
can  afford  cambric  ;  and  sentiment  is  a  superfluity  compared 
with  fortune.  Really,  this  strikes  me  as  pretty  !  I  com- 
mend you  to  a  brilliant  establishment ;  and  we  part,  don't 
we,  luckily,  if  we  can  be  torn  away  without  bleeding  ?  Se- 
riously, your  papa  would  be  delighted  with  the  match,  and 
so  would  our  family.  You  have  too  much  sense  to  call  me 
bad-hearted,  for  saying  all  this,  I  know.  I  shall  keep  half 
a  lock  of  your  hair,  for  old  acquaintance  sake." 

Lucy  read  this  effusion  with  a  shade  more  emotion  than 
Herbert  had  written  it  with  ;  and  laughed  a  good  deal  less 
than  he  had  done  :  but  neither  of  them  suffered  very  deeply. 

When  Captain  Beddoes  came  home  to  a  quiet  family  din- 
ner, Lucy  informed  him  that  the  Snigsbys  had  returned,  and 
one  of  them  called  with  a  note  from  Flower. 

"  Hah,  rich  people,  Rivers  was  saying,"  the  captain  said, 
carelessly  ;  "  the  old  man  was  very  civil  to  me  at  the  Intoler- 
able's  ball.  We'll  ask  them  here,  if  you  like." 

"Just  as  you  please,  papa,"  said  Lucy,  simply. 

"  Sure  it  wouldn't  bore  you  ?" 

"  Oh  no  ;  they  seem  kind,  well-meaning  people." 

"  Ah,  we'll  arrange  about  it." 

At  the  same  time,  Alfred  was  narrating  his  visit  to  his 
family,  and  failed  not  to  remark  that  Lucy  was  "jolly  good- 
looking." 

11* 


394  SWELL   LIFE   AT  SEA;  OR, 


CHAPTER    VIII. 

• 

THE  ordinary  notions  of  the  requirements  in  an  alliance 
might  be  summed  up  for  general  purposes  as  follows : — 
Money  and  birth — if  possible — but,  at  all  events,  money ! 
Here  and  there  a  stray  fellow  plumes  himself  upon  his  an- 
cestors, and  declines  to  mix  the  paternal  stream  with  blood 
which,  like  the  Sacramento,  brings  mud  along  with  the  gold. 
But  even  such  a  stray  fellow  is  found  frequently  to  reflect 
that,  while  he  has  barely  money  enough  for  one,  he  has 
"  blood"  enough  for  two.  This  philosophical  reflection  once 
admitted,  the  mind  wonderfully  opens  to  the  more  liberal 
notions  on  these  points.  A  pecuniary  prospect  dawns 
clearer  and  clearer.  Some  young  lady  of  means  is  forth- 
coming, and  the  "  prejudices  of  antiquity"  glide  gradually 
away.  She  has  been  born  with  a  silver  spoon  in  her  mouth, 
and  he  puts  his  crest  on  it — what  can  be  more  delightfully 
harmonious  ?  In  this  way  all  ranks  of  us  are  gradually 
mingling  in  England,  and  intolerance  in  classes  is  becoming 
daily  more  hateful  and  ridiculous.  Now  and  then,  to  be 
sure,  somebody  exclaims — 

"  Leave  us  still  our  old  nobility ;" 

but,  as  a  general  rule,  the  length  of  a  man's  pedigree  by  no 
means  atones  for  the  length  of  his  ears. 

These  highly  philosophical  remarks  have  been  suggested 
by  the  circumstances  mentioned  in  the  last  chapter.  Alfred 
Snigsby  left  the  Strada  decidedly  impressed  with  Miss  Bed- 
does'  beauty.  We  have  seen  how  susceptible  he  was  on  a 
former  occasion,  and  now  the  favorite  vision  of  "  chambers" 
lost  its  attraction,  and  he  began  to  form  a  new  ideal — that 
of  his  being  the  presiding  spirit  of  a  country  house,  and 
giving  breakfasts  on  hunting  mornings  to  the  neighboring 


Fox,   FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  395 

gentry.  With  regard  to  the  consent  of  parents  there  was 
no  difficulty  to  be  apprehended.  Her  AlPs  happiness  was 
Mrs.  Snigsby's  only  object ;  and  his  father,  who  knew  that 
he  would  have  to  make  a  settlement  on  him  some  time,  had 
philosophy  enough  to  reflect  that  it  might  as  well  happen 
now  as  at  a  future  period.  (And  it  required  some  philoso- 
phy to  know  this,  at  least,  if  we  may  judge  by  the  irrational 
prejudices  of  so  many  parents  to  whom  instant  disbursement 
is  so  ridiculously  awful.)  We  must  therefore  consider  Al- 
fred in  the  capacity  of  suitor  ;  and  sympathize  with  him  in 
his  suit.  We  can  fancy  how  one  call  led  to  another,  and 
the  second  to  an  excursion  to  Citta  Yecchia ;  and  how 
their  names  were  mentioned  together  in  social  gossip  ;  and 
how  soon  Miss  Lucy  contrived  to  inform  him  that  never  had 
she  thought  of  Herbert  Flower  except  with  the  ordinary 
affection  of  an  old  family  friend.  Alfred  wrote  to  that 
youth  to  say  how  happy  he  was  ;  and  received  a  most  cor- 
dial reply,  with  a  postcript  respecting  something  he  had  or- 
dered from  a  well-known  firm  in  Strada  Pocco,  which  had 
not  attended  to  him  punctually  as  usual.  The  conduct  of 
the  worthy  Captain  Beddoes  was  a  model  of  quiet  tact. 
He  first  satisfied  himself  by  corresponding  with  an  old 
friend,  a  "  man  of  the  world,"  in  London,  who  ascertained 
the  Snigsbaean  fortune  with  the  accuracy  of  an  accountant ; 
and  then — to  use  a  classical  metaphor  of  no  ordinary  beau- 
ty— he  lay  down  at  leisure,  and  listened  to  the  murmur  of 
the  Pactolus  which  was  to  enrich  his  house.  Never  did 
anybody  manage  to  escape  being  bored  with  the  prelimina- 
ries better  than  he  ;  and  when  an  intimate  or  two,  men  of 
the  world  likewise,  asked  any  questions  about  the  matter, 
he  shrugged  his  shoulders. — "  People  of  fortune,  sir/'  was 
the  phrase  which,  like  the  Allah  akhbar  of  the  Mussulman, 
expressed  the  essence  of  his  reflections  on  the  subject.  An 
easy,  experienced,  loo-loving,  sherry-consuming  old  gentle- 


396  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

man,  brought  up  in  good  old  garrison  traditions,  he  accepted 
the  piece  of  luck,  just  as  he  would  have  done  a  fluke  at  bil- 
liards— without  particular  comment — yet  quietly  making  it 
up.  He  showed  Alfred  a  good  deal  of  dignified  attention, 
and  asked  him  to  dinner  at  the  mess,  and  when  he  had  oc- 
casion to  scrawl  a  note  to  Mr.  Snigsby,  senior,  he  im- 
pressed him  considerably  by  the  use  of  a  ferocious-looking 
but  harmless  old  "  wyvern,"  which  adorned  his  seal.  In 
the  meantime,  the  yacht  was  lying  in  the  harbor,  and  Blobb 
was  passing  his  mornings — one  may  suppose — as  usual,  at 
the  "  Shepherd  and  Shepherdess."  Here  he  pursued  the 
classic  game  of  skittles  among  his  peers — occasionally  giv- 
ing snug  little  entertainments  on  board  the  "  Paragon," 
when  he  entertained  his  guests  with  dry  sarcastic  observa- 
tions on  the  Snigsbys,  his  employers.  These,  as  we  have 
before  seen,  he  had  long  since  discerned  not  to  be  "regular 
swells."  Few  things  are  more  amusing  and  interesting  than 
the  aristocratic  tendencies  of  men  like  Mr.  Blobb.  It  is  a 
real  old  piece  of  superstition  that  tendency  which  they  have, 
to  respect  a  genuine  "  swejl."  For  they  are  not  to  be  im- 
posed upon  by  mere  money.  Lord  Blory — as  his  tradesmen 
knew — was  not  rich.  Nevertheless,  Blobb  respected  him  as 
an  ancient  Briton  did  a  Druid — and  entertained  a  mystic 
awe  for  his  ancestors.  It  is  common  to  speak  of  the  present 
as  an  "  enlightened"  age.  But  wherever  there  is  stupidity 
there  is  "  darkness."  The  fact  is  the  present  age  believes 
in  ghosts — to  an  extent  which  no  previous  age  ever  paraL 
leled — in  the  ghosts  of  institutions,  my  dear  reader — in  the 
ghosts  of  all  sorts  of  mediaeval  figures,  which  have  not  the 
reality  people  pretend  to  see  in  them  at  all.  "Ancestors" 
are  very  noble  possessions  to  a  man  who  is  right  worthy 
and  able  himself ;  but  to  my  mind,  the  more  ancestors  a 
blockhead  has,  of  eminence,  the  worse  it  is  for  him.  To 
such  a  man  the  ashes  of  the  dead,  had  he  any  feeling,  would 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  397 

be  like  coals  of  fire  !  All  this  has  only,  however,  an  indi- 
rect application  to  Mr.  Blobb  ;  Mr.  B.'s  regard  for  Lord 
Blory's  ancestors  was  interesting  and  illustrative ;  it  was 
something  so  darkly  and  mysteriously  reverent !  I  verily 
believe  that  some  people  fancy  the  "  lower  orders"  never 
had  any  forefathers  at  all — but  sprang  out  of  clay  in  some 
unexplained  manner  a  few  generations  back. 

We  must  however  return  to  Alfred,  who  now  assumes  an 
unusual  importance,  on  account  of  the  event  which  is  sup. 
posed  to  be  impending.  If  is  amusing  to  see  the  tender — 
the  rather  melancholy — interest  which  invests  a  person  in 
his  situation.  Though,  to  be  sure,  courtship,  unless  of  the 
high-flying,  passionate,  and  poetic  character,  (we  could  do  a 
little  in  that  way  if  we  liked,  reader  ! )  is  a  very  dull  affair 
to  describe.  For  after  all  there  goes  so  much  common-place 
to  make  it  up.  Like  "  swizzle,"  as  was  remarked  by  a  naval 
friend  in  a  philosophic  mood,  it  is  two  parts  water  !  It  com- 
prises so  many  ordinary  every-day  proceedings,  such  lunch- 
ing, and  dining,  and  walking  when  it  will  come  on  to  rain, 
such  fluctuation  of  moods,  and  ebbing  and  flowing  of  tides 
of  fancy,  that  it  is  apt  to  be  prosaic  in  detail.  Then,  as 
genius  is  more  shown  in  making  details  interesting  than  in 
anything  else,  it  becomes  a  very  hard  thing  to  treat  of  in 
fiction.  And  one  is  driven  to  generalities,  and  to  request 
the  reader  to  fancy  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  paying  his  addresses 
to  Miss  Beddoes  from  day  to  day.  Lucy,  who  with  all  her 
simplicity  has  a  kind  of  tact — of  which  she  is  half  conscious 
— which  gives  her  insight  into  character,  has  several  times 
arrived  at  the  conclusion,  and  always  deliberately  shut  her 
eyes  when  face  to  face  with  the  same,  that  Mr.  Alfred  is — 
a  fool,  shall  I  say  ?  Why,  not  exactly.  No.  She  does  not 
like  to  say  that,  and  she  strives  to  reconcile  matters,  by  say- 
ing to  herself,  that  she  has  no  right  to  judge  harshly  of  any- 
body. And  this  pleasant  sophistry,  which,  I  apprehend. 


398  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA  ;    OR, 

everybody  carries  on  more  or  less,  is  very  like  a  habit  of 
taking  laudanum,  which  grows  upon  one,  and  at  last  be- 
comes, instead  of  a  pleasant  variety,  a  most  miserable  neces- 
sity. It  was  all  the  more  painful  too,  of  course,  for  Lucy 
to  observe  that  Alfred  had  no  suspicion  whatever  of  the 
same  kind  himself.  The  truth  is,  that  the  disciples  of 
Brickies  (and  I  am  anxious  to  illustrate  in  this  story  the 
effect  of  the  writings  of  that  great  man)  mistake  their  su- 
perficial contempt  for  all  that  is  serious  in  life,  for  a  sort  of 
Talleyrandish  superiority  to  it.  They  think,  poor  fellows, 
that  when  they  have  grinned  at  "  earnestness,"  and  sneered 
at  anything  professing  a  "purpose,"  they  have  risen  into 
some  lofty  Machiavellian  height  from  which  they  can  look 
down.  Hence — though  the  high  Bricklesian,  perhaps,  can 
manage  to  keep  the  sneering  worldly  height  with  some  suc- 
cess permanently,  as  a  dog  can  stand  on  his  hind  legs  after 
very  much  practice,  the  weaker  Bricklesian  becomes  ten 
times  more  infatuated,  when  he  gets  what  he  calls  "  spoony," 
than  anybody  else.  And  so  far  was  Alfred  from  knowing 
his  weakness,  that — to  adopt  a  saying  of  Fontenoy's — one 
of  those  disgracefully  acrid  sayings  which  shock  all  right- 
minded  people,  "  he  carried  his  ears  as  if  they  were  laurels." 
Encouraged  by  Lucy's  encouragement,  he  began  to  blend 
with  his  "  spooniness"  a  sort  of  semi-comic  tone,  and  I  dare 
say  sometimes  thought  that  the  fact  that  he,  the  brilliant 
Alfred,  should  meditate  matrimony,  was  a  falling-off,  and  a 
joke.  It  was  no  joke  to  Lucy,  however. 

One  morning  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  might  have  been  ob- 
served seated  at  his  desk  in  Strada  Reale,  with  a  very  bril- 
liant sheet  of  paper  before  him  still  untouched,  though  there 
were  several  blurred,  blotted,  and  scribbled  ones  beside 
him.  The  fact  is,  he  was  about  to  make  his  formal  propo- 
sal !  And  though  he  had  been  virtually  "  accepted  "  for 
some  time,  yet  there  is  a  point  in  every  courtship,  my  good 


FUN,  FKIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  399 

reader,  when  sentimental  generalities  have  to  concentrate 
themselves  and  assume  a  practical  form. 

The  Practical  (with  a  big  P)  vindicates  its  right  always 
in  due  time.  There  never  was  a  religion  yet  which  did  not 
require  bricks  and  mortar  to  build  with  ;  that  touching  sen- 
timent, commercial  confidence,  will  embody  itself,  every  now 
and  then,  in  an  I  O  U.  Courtship  leads  to  settlements. 
So,  Alfred  had  made  up  his  mind  to  put  the  formal  question 
to  Miss  Beddoes,  and  to  pour  out  his  expectations  to  her 
papa.  He  tried,  poor  fellow,  while  concocting  the  epistles, 
to  persuade  himself  into  a  light,  easy,  comic  view  of  the 
matter.  But  there  was  a  fullness  about  the  throat  which 
did  not  exactly  proceed  from  the  effects  of  his  Joinville,  and 
a  general  sensation  of  his  uneasiness,  which  belied  his  grin. 
At  last  he  finished  the  notes,  and  sent  them  off.  And  then 
he  emerged  from  the  house  into  Strada  Reale.  I  regret  to 
say  that  he  then  went  into  "Joe  MicallePs,"  for  he  wanted 
some  "  soda  and  curacoa"  to  "  set  him  up." 

"  Morning,  sar  !"  said  Joe,  in  his  affable  way.  Joe  was 
presiding  at  his  counter  there,  with  the  usual  stump  of  a 
cigar  in  his  mouth.  There  was  also  one  naval  youth  there, 
(of  course) — young  Rlcketts,  of  the  Polypus — who  had  a 
nodding  acquaintance  with  Alfred,  and  who  nodded  accord- 
ingly, and  said — 

"  Queer  this  morning — out  late.  Supped  at  the  Govern- 
or's— devilled  kidneys — mulled  port."  Which  sentences, 
Rieketts  of  the  Polypus  jerked  out  in  a  fragmentary  man- 
ner, without  adding  a  single  phrase ;  just  as  he  had  jerked 
them  out  to  three  different  casual  visitors  of  "  Joe's"  that 
morning. 

Alfred  stayed  dawdling  about  "Joe's"  in  a  wretched 
state  of  uncertainty.  First  of  all  he  kept  looking  at  the 
clock,  and  wondering  whether  his  note  for  Lucy  had 
reached  ;  whether  his  note  to  her  parent  had  reached  ; 


400  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

when  the  answer  would  come,  &c.  "  Now,"  thought  Mr 
Alfred,  "  she  is  just  writing." 

In  truth,  Lucy  was  writing.  And  if  the  reader  will  per- 
mit me,  we  will  peep  into  the  drawing-room  of  her  dwelling, 
and  see  her.  I  have  her  image  before  me  at  this  moment — 
a  slight  delicate  girl — what  Mr.  Herbert  Flower  was  wont 
to  call  to  his  intimate  friends,  a  Poppet — that  is,  with  a 
certain  innocent  dollishness  of  prettiness,  which  to  some 
people  is  peculiarly  enchanting.  There  she  sits  radiant  in  a 
light  morning  dress  ;  the  airy,  beautiful  coolness  of  which 
seems  like  a  piece  of  English  summer  inside  the  Southern 
summer.  Before  her  is  a  most  brilliant  ink-stand,  and 
several  sheets  of  creamy  paper — and  she  has  broken  at  least 
three  flowers  to  pieces  in  musing  over  the  subject  which 
occupies  her  attention.  At  last  she  begins,  and  she  looks 
up  to  her  aunt,  who  is  sitting  beside  her.  Miss  Beddoes, 
that  maiden  lady,  is  a  most  excellent  person,  not  given  to 
developing  herself  in  talk,  but  who  turns  out,  if  you  get 
friendly  with  her,  to  be  considerably  "  up  "  in  controversial 
theology. 

"  Well,  aunt,"  Lucy  said,  "  I  suppose  I  must  write  I  I 
suppose  I  ought  to — ought  to  be  very  happy — oughtn't  I  ?" 

"  My  dear,  you  ought  to  know  best.  I  would  not  under- 
take the  responsibility  of  advising  you  on  so  serious  a  mat- 
ter 1  You  are  aware  that  in  a  worldly  point  of  view — (how 
beautifully  do  these  periphrases,  my  dear  reader,  avoid  the 
unpleasantness  of  using  the  word  'money  V) — in  a  worldly 
point  of  view — the  match  is  one  which  would  be  quite  satis- 
factory to  your  family.  Perhaps,  my  dear,  you  would  like 
to  have  me,  in  perfect  confidence,  consult  Mr.  Fatton  ?" 

(Our  readers  have  not,  I  hope,  forgotten  the  Rev.  Mr. 
Fatton,  of  St.  Kilderkin.  The  Rev.  Mr.  F.,  who  openly 
denounces  the  "  confessional "  of  the  rival  establishment,  is 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  401 

yet  given  to  a  little  private  confession  and  absolution  among 
his  flock — in  a  quiet  way.) 

"  No,  thank  you,  dear,"  said  Lucy,  a  little  drily. 

"  You  must  then  consult  your  own  heart  alone,  my  dar- 
ling." 

Lucy  made  a  dash  at  the  note. 

"  DEAR  MR.  SNIGSBY — (It's  certainly  a  strange  name.)" 

"  I  dare  say,  as  you  are  an  heiress,  he  might  be  induced 
to  take  your  name,  my  dear — if  that  is  a  serious  objection." 
"I  have  to  thank  you,"  resumed  Lucy,  "  for  the  kind  letter 
which  you  have  sent  me  ;  and  I  hope  I  am  not  insensible  of 
the  honor  of  the  proposal  which  it  conveys.  I  do  not  think 
you  will  find  that  I  fail  to  appreciate  the  sentiments  which 
have  prompted  it ;  and  I  shall  be  happy  to  hear  from  my 
father,  in  such  a  spirit,  as  I  expect  him  to  treat  the  offer 
which  you  tell  me  you  have  made  to  him. 

"  Yery  sincerely,          L.  B." 

"  There,  aunt  !  that's  civil  enough — and  common-place 
enough — and  un-romantic  enough,  I  hope  !" 

And  up  started  Lucy,  in  some  agitation,  and  looked  at 
herself  in  the  glass,  and  bathed  her  forehead  in  eau  de  Co- 
logne. 

"  For  goodness  sake,  be  calm,  my  darling,"  said  her  aunt, 
folding  up  the  note  gently,  but  promptly. 

"  You  approve  it,  aunt  ?"  said  Lucy,  looking  very  much 
as  if  she  were  going  to  cry. 

"  It  is  quite  correctly  worded,  my  dear,  I  think." 

In  ten  minutes  more  the  note  was  sent  off. 

So  far  so  good.  Meanwhile  Alfred's  note  to  Captain 
Beddoes  reached  that  officer  at  the  club,  and  was  handed  to 
him  just  as  he  was  playing  billiards.  He  glanced  at  it — it 
was  his  turn— he  made  a  very  pretty  winning  hazard,  and 


402  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;   OR, 

then — leaving  himself  very  safe — read  it  at  his  leisure.  A 
youth  who  had  been  watching  the  game,  strolled  out,  leav- 
ing the  Captain  alone  with  his  very  old  chum — a  certain 
old  Colonel  Bechamel — with  whom  he  was  playing. 

"  I  suppose  there's  no  harm  in  showing  it  to  you,"  said 
he,  pitching  it  across. 

"  Hah  1"  said  the  Colonel  resuming  his  cue,  "  that  tali 
young  fellow — I  know  him.  Plenty  of  money,  I. think  you 
said.  Well,  Pm  glad  to  hear  it.  To  be  sure,  Lucy's  a  girl 
that  ought  to  marry  anybody  she  likes." 

"  You're  kind  always ;  you  good  old  Bechamel.  But 
you  and  I  have  lived  long  enough  to  know  that  money  is 
after  all  the  great  thing  in  these  times." 

"  Yes,"  said  Bechamel ;  "  you  know  what  poor  old  Blory 
used  to  say  ?  '  They  use  us  old  families/  said  he,  '  as  they 
do  the  ancient  remains  in  Greece — patch  brick  walls  with 
us  I'  How  like  Blory  that  was  !" 

"  Clever  man  to  be  sure.  He  might  have  done  anything 
he  liked." 

"  So  I  told  him  ;  and  he  said  he  preferred  doing  every- 
thing he  liked.  And  he  certainly  did  it !" 

"  We  won't  play  any  more,  then." 

"  No." 

The  two  old  veterans  left  the  club,  and  crossed  the  square. 
As  they  walked  along,  they  chatted  about  the  matter  in 
hand,  and  parted  with  more  warmth  than  usual,  as  men  who 
care  for  each  other  do,  when  anything  of  consequence  to 
either  of  them  has  been  the  subject  of  conversation.  The 
captain  moved  on,  musing  on  Mr.  Alfred's  letter — on  the 
advantage  of  having  a  rich  son-in-law,  and  wondering 
whether  it  would  not  be  a  good  thing  for  the  youth  to  go 
into  a  dragoon  regiment  for  a  year  or  two.  That  would 
polish  him  up,  the  captain  very  justly  thought,  reasoning 
(without  the  aid  of  Rochefoucault,  who  has  made  the  obser- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  403 

vation)  that  Pair  bourgeois  se  perd  quclquefois  d  Parmee.  But 
by  this  time  he  was  at  home. 

There  were  two  gentlemen  there,  making  a  call  on  the 
ladies  ;  but  the  captain  caught  his  daughter's  eye,  and  they 
exchanged  glances. 

"  Heard  the  news,  Beddoes  ?"  said  Captain  Trivet. 

"  News  ?"  (the  captain  smiled  inwardly  ;)  "  what  news  ?" 

"  Oh  !  the  Alexandrian  mail's  come  in — a  great  battle 
in  India." 

"Ah!  bless  me  I" 

"  Of  course,  we've  thrashed  the  fellows,7'  said  little  Trivet, 
(who  has  not  been  in  action,  that  I  am  aware  of,)  compla- 
cently ;  "  but  several  of  our  fellows  of  high  rank  are  killed. 
You  remember  Philabeg  Herbert  ?" 

"  Major  in  the  — th  ?     I  know." 

"  Most  gallant  charge — killed  with  a  round  shot.'1 

"  Poor  fellow  !"  said  the  captain.  "  Then,  that  young 
midshipman  in  the  Bustard  comes  in  to  the  estates  ?" 

"  There's  the  odd  part  of  it.  I've  just  heard — in  fact  it's 
come  out — now  that  old  Philabeg's  killed — that — ahem  ! 
You  see,  this  young  Herbert,  or  youth  called  Herbert,  we'll 
say — "Trivet  grinned — "can't  succeed.  The  estates  are 
most  rigidly  entailed  on — ah  !  the  real  Herberts — most 
awful  thing  for  this  poor  boy  in  the  Bustard  to  find  out  all 
about  his — his  unfortunate  position — now  I" 

The  captain  gave  a  low,  strange  whistle  of  an  eccentric 
and  prolonged  description.  "And  who  succeeds,  then?" 
And  here  he  rose  and  brought  out  the  "  Landed  Gentry," 
which  occasionally  amused  his  long  evenings,  and  turned  to 
the  "  Herberts  of  Cockrow  Tower."  Of  course,  there  was 
a  "Ranulphus  de  Herbert;"  and  there  was  an  "ancient 
rhyme"  which  tradition  had  "preserved,"  (which  Tradition, 
by  the  way,  too  often  "  preserves"  mere  offal,  as  the  Admi- 
ralty contractors  do,)  viz.,  this  beautiful  fragment — 


404  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  When  ye  De  Herbert  doth  ride, 
Woe  doth  ye  churl  betide." 

And  there  was  a  De  Herbert  who  was  a  "favorite"  of 
some  king ;  and  there  was  a  "from  whom  descended"  (con- 
cerning which  favorite,  little,  sly  line,  reader,  you  and  I 
have  our  suspicions,  perhaps,  often  ;)  and,  finally,  you  came 
upon  firm  substantial  pepigree  about  Charles's  time.  You 
then  saw — that  is,  our  friend  the  captain  did — how  few 
Herberts  there  had  been  every  generation  ;  and  that,  finally, 
the  late  Major  not  having  left  legitimate  issue,  the  estates 
would  revert  to  the  issue  of  his  great-grandfather's  daugh- 
ter, Ada  ,  married  in  17 — ,  to  CHARLES  HENRY 

FLOWER  of  FLORY. 

"  By  Jove  !"  said  Captain  Beddoes,  rising  solemnly,  like 
a  Presbyterian  about  to  say  grace — "  by  Jove  !  the  FLOW- 
ERS get  that  splendid  property  1" 

"  What,  papa  F  said  Lucy,  flushing  all  red  with  surprise, 
"  our  friends  ?" 

"  To  be  sure  ;  won't  young  Herbert  be  delighted  ?  Now, 
Lucy,  it  will  be  a  graceful  thing,  as  we're  old  friends  of  the 
family,  for  you  to  write  and  tell  Herbert  the  news.  His 
ship's  at  Athens,  and  he  will  have  it  from  you  first  of  all." 

Lucy  left  the  room ;  and  when  she  was  snug  in  her  own 
room,  what  with  emotion  and  the  excitement  of  the  day, 
and  looking  at  Herbert  Flower's  last  letter  to  her,  (which, 
in  my  private  opinion,  it  was  about  time  for  her  to  have 
burned  before  this,)  she  cried  bitterly.  A  water-lily  in  a 
shower  of  rain — -oh,  reader !  did  you  ever  see  that  ?  How 
the  river  is  quivering  all  round  it,  and  the  broad  leaves  pat- 
ter and  dip,  and  the  whole  white  beauty  of  the  flower  is 
shivering  and  glancing  in  a  fever  of  excitement !  Such-like 
was  our  friend  Lucy  then.  If  you  remark,  it  is  only  at  a 
certain  period,  perhaps  even  by  accident,  that  one  finds  out 
that  one  has  a  real  heart.  Circumstances,  education,  may 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  405 

have  made  one  feel  worldly,  and  look  worldly  ;  but  sud- 
denly, by  what  you  may  call  a  conversion,  an  impulse — it 
may  be  a  death,  it  may  be  a  pretty  face — your  whole  emo- 
tions are  awakened,  and  you  seem  a  new  man  or  woman. 
For,  under  the  thickest  conventionalism,  there  lies  plenty 
of  emotion,  just  as  under  solid  old  London  and  its  founda- 
tion of  chalk  there  is  plenty  of  the  purest  of  water. 

But  Lucy  had  to  come  down  in  due  time,  and  the  three 
Beddoeses  dined  together.  And  then  there  was  a  private 
interview  between  Lucy  and  her  father  ;  and  next  morning 
Captain  Beddoes  dressed  himself  elaborately,  and  visited 
Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby,  who,  in  spite  of  his  "  knowingness,"  in 
spite  of  his  acquaintance  with  the  writings  of  Brickies,  who 
had  sneered  at  matrimony,  and  other  things  holy,  till  his 
whole  moral  nature  (like  his  nose)  had  a  sneering  turn  up- 
wards towards  heaven  ! — in  spite  of  all  this,  was,  to  speak 
his  own  beautiful  language,  in  a  "  very  great  funk."  Old 
Beddoes,  who  was  a  gentleman,  (not  a  manufactured  gen- 
tleman, made  out  of  the  raw  material,  but  a  born  one,)  con- 
ducted the  delicate  matter  with  the  greatest  tact.  Alfred 
was  an  accepted  suitor. 

The  reader  is  now  requested  to  follow  me  to  the  "  Intole- 
rable." The  Squadron  is  still  in  the  Archipelago,  putting 
the  Eastern  question  to  rights.  The  affair  is  conducting 
itself  beautifully.  Snogg  at  Lemnos  has  landed  a  party  of 
armed  men,  and  bullied  a  Pasha  into  "  apologizing"  for 
something — a  great  triumph  for  Snogg,  who  inherits  a  turn 
for  severe  officiality  from  his  grandfather  the  beadle.  Snogg 
has  made  a  long  dispatch  about  this.  Snogg  has  become 
more  pompous  than  ever  on  account  of  this.  Snogg  now, 
more  successfully  than  ever,  helps  to  spoil  that  climate,  and 
make  miserable  the  brig  "  Lotos,"  for  the  two  midshipmen 
he  most  hates — MAXWELL  ADAIR,  who  is  a  scholar,  and 


SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

pleasant  CHARLES  HILDERSTONE,  who  quarters  the  arms  of 
the  Plantagenets.  Meanwhile,  at  Athens,  the  squadron 
are  enjoying  the  hospitalities  of  the  Minister,  including  Bul- 
bous, who  keeps  the  entire  Greek  ministry  waiting  dinner 
at  the  embassy  half  an  hour,  comes  in  red  and  reeking, 
when  everybody  is  disgusted  with  waiting,  and  then  (mark 
this  as  a  trait  in  vulgar  people  generally)  is  sulky  with  the 
company  all  day,  because  he  has  annoyed  them !  And  so  the 
affairs  of  the  East  arrange  themselves,  and  Greece  is  put 
to  rights  in  the  orthodox  manner. 

It  happened  that  the  note  of  Lucy  Beddoes  found  Mr. 
Herbert  Flower,  by  an  odd  coincidence,  where  we  left  him, 
viz.,  walking  the  poop  for  punishment !  I  don't  say  that 
he  has  been  there  during  the  whole  interval,  but  he  had  cer- 
tainly been  sent  there  that  morning,  by  the  worthy  Bilboes, 
for  some  offence  against  discipline.  Fancy  his  delight  when 
the  news  came.  It  turned  his  head.  He  gently  walked 
below  without  consulting  the  authorities.  "  Steward,"  he 
roared,  "  half-a-dozen  of  champagne  \n  Astonishment  seized 
the  mess. 

11 1  thought  you  were  on  the  poop,  Mr.  Flower,"  said 
Toadyley. 

"Did  you?"  said  Herbert,  in  reply.  "We  think  many 
strange  things.  I  once  thought  all  officers  were  gentlemen, 
but  I  know  better.  The  corkscrew  !" 

Toadyley  turned  pale,  and  eyed  a  cane  which  stood  in  a 
corner  of  the  gun-room.  He  was  wondering  whether  it 
would  be  "safe"  to  "lick"  Mr.  H.  F. 

"  Pop"  went  the  first  bottle.  But  here  the  right-minded 
reader's  mind  suggests  a  question  to  him — was  not  this 
glee  rather  odd  on  Mr.  Flower's  part — glee  on  the  strength 
of  the  slaugther  of  an  old  gentleman  who  was  his  father's 
cousin  ? 

My  dear  reader,  when  the  late  Lord  K ,  my  long- 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  407 

descended  neighbor,  who  bore  a  title  renowned  in  the  his- 
tory of  our  native  land,  received  the  unexpected  news  of  his 
uncle's  death,  which  placed  him  in  the  estate  and  title — 
"  What !"  cried  he,  "  is  the  old  fellow  dead,  screwed  down, 
and  all  safe  ln  Let  us  proceed. 

Bottle  after  bottle  went  "  pop"  likewise  ;  and  presently 
a  loud  cheer  reached  the  ears  of  Commander  Bilboes  in  the 
ward-room.  Mr.  Flower's  friends  were  welcoming  the  news 
which  he  told  them  ;  and  by  this  time  Mr.  Toady  ley  had 
conveyed  the  intelligence  of  Mr.  Flower's  desertion  of  his 
station  to  the  commander's  ear.  The  commander,  in  high 
indignation,  sent  for  him ;  and  the  youth,  first  looking 
round  to  see  that  there  was  no  witness  within  hearing,  stole 
up  to  the  commander,  and  spoke  thus — (horresco  referens .') — 
"  Come,  sir,  you  are  talking  like  a  tyrant !  You  are  a 
tyrant,  with  the  heart  of  a  flunkey,  and  the  manners  of  a 
boor  !  You  delight  to  inflict  petty  annoyances  on  the  gen- 
tlemen whom  accident  has  put  under  your  power — " 

"  Sen-try  !  Sentry  !"  roared  old  Bilboes,  gasping  for 
breath.  "  Come  here,  sentry  !" — a  cry  which  brought  the 
marine  running  to  his  side.  Mr.  Flower  declined,  however, 
to  repeat  his  vigorous  sentence  ;  but  he  was  sent  below 
"  under  arrest."  "  Under  arrest"  is  a  favorite  mode  of  in- 
spiring terror  with  some  commanders,  but  is  not  always  very 
successful.  "D — n  him,"  said  Gunne  of  the  Orson,  of  one 
of  his  midshipmen  whom  he  had  subjected  to  this  restraint, 
and  who  took  it  philosophically,  "  he  gets  fatP  Herbert 
Flower,  like  Gunne's  victim,  showed  a  tendency  to  take  the 
matter  easily.  So  they  sent  him  on  to  Malta  to  be  dealt 
with  by  Sir  Booby  Booing.  Sir  Booby  loved  punishing. 
He  loved  to  bite,  though  he  hadn't  a  tooth  in  his  head. 
He  was  in  his  second  childhood ;  and,  as  in  childhood, 
children  smash  toys,  in  second  childhood  admirals  smash 
officers. 


408  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

A  youth  who  has  health,  pluck,  and  hope,  and  loves  his 
intellectual  independence,  feels  no  particular  awe  of  an 
imbecile  old  gent,  in  a  seedy,  blue  coat ;  and  Herbert 
Flower's  interview  with  Sir  B.  B.,  to  whom  he  was  intro- 
duced with  awful  ceremonies  by  flunkies  arid  flag-lieutenants, 
left  no  permanent  impression  on  his  mind.  (I  have  heard 
him  regret  that  the  admiral  was  not  more  particular  in  his 
toilette.)  The  upshot  was,  that  Mr.  Herbert  Flower  was 
discharged  to  the  Kabob  to  await  a  passage  to  England, 
and  went  on  shore  when  he  pleased  from  that  vessel.  In- 
deed, he  may  be  said  to  have  now  become  what  naval  men 
call  a  "  T.  G." — a  travelling  gentleman.  It  was  probably 
this  feeling  which  induced  him  to  wear  plain  clothes  always 
when  on  shore.  The  affliction  which  he  had  suffered  in  the 
loss  of  Major  Herbert,  at  the  battle  of  Blarianshillah,  (the 
major  had  been  sent  into  a  jungle  with  a  company  to  attack 
10,000  Ramsharigs,  heavily  armed  !)  was  proclaimed  out- 
wardly by  the  most  elegant  mourning — the  appearance  of 
which  of  course  naturally  led  to  inquiries — which  inquiries 
led  to  the  explanation  of  the  luck  which  had  befallen  the 
house  of  Flower.  The  excessive  buoyancy  and  audacity  the 
news  had  produced  in  him  was  something  wonderful  ;  he 
openly  proclaimed,  in  Ricardo's,  his  intention  of  "  standing 
for  the  county."  He  would  then  announce  his  contempt 
for  Sir  Gruffin  Ribs,  who  at  present  enjoyed  that  honor — 
Sir  Gruffin  Ribs,  the  inventor  of  the  Patent  Potato-Crusher, 
who  had  purchased  huge  estates  there.  "  Fact  is,"  Herbert 
would  say,  "  we  were  too  poor  to  contest  it,  and  the  great 
magnate,  the  Duke  of ,  wouldn't  condescend  to  inter- 
fere— except,  by-the-by,  when  that  man,  Creekles,  tried  it ; 
d — n  it,  that  was  going  too  far,  as  the  duke  observed  !" 
All  this,  with  the  shrugging  of  the  little  shoulders,  and 
the  ineffable  precocity  of  our  friend  the  Phenomenon,  gene- 
rally, was  extremely  amusing  to  the  philosophic  observer. 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING. 


409 


In  the  meantime  Captain  Beddoes  had  heard  of  Flower's 
arrival  in  Malta,  and  one  day  at  dinner — Alfred  being  there 
— he  said,  "  Oh,  Lucy,  I  wonder  why  Herbert  Flower  has 
not  called  ?" 

Lucy  started  slightly  :  people  will  start  when  particular 
names  are  abruptly  mentioned.  "  Fm  sure  I  can't  guess." 
She  seemed  languid,  and  it  had  been  a  very  oppressive 
summer  that  year.  Alfred  Snigsby  felt  a  little  pang  of 
fear  ;  he  liked  Flower,  but  always  stood  in  some  little  awe 
of  him. 

"  We  ought  to  see  him,"  said  Captain  Beddoes,  innocently. 
"  I  suppose  you  are  too  much  occupied  to  look  him  out, 
Mr.  Snigsby,  eh  ?" 

"  I  will  go  and  see  about  him  this  evening,"  said  Alfred  ; 
and,  in  the  interval  between  dessert  and  tea,  he  and  the 
captain  strolled  out  together.  "  I  have  forgotten  my  hand- 
kerchief," said  Alfred,  abruptly,  when  they  had  got  about 
a  hundred  yards  from  the  door.  He  ran  rather  smartly 
back.  The  servant  happened  to  be  standing  at  the  door, 
so  he  went  in  unannounced  by  a  knock.  Running  up  to  the 
drawing-room,  he  passed  in.  Lucy  was  sitting  near  the 
window,  in  the  twilight.  Everybody  has  some  little  touch 
of  poetic  sentiment ;  and  the  long  Bricklesian  paused  to 
look  at  the  girl,  who  did  not  hear  him,  and  who  was  musing 
absently.  Alfred  entered  softly  and  unperceived — and,  as 
he  gained  the  table,  he  saw  a  letter  on  it.  He  drew  his 
breath  suddenly.  He  knew  the  hand.  It  was  the  writing 
of  Herbert  Flower. 

Alfred  felt  suddenly  very  much  startled,  and  there  was  a 
sort  of  mistiness  floating  before  his  eyes.  By  a  sudden  im- 
pulse, he  seized  the  letter,  and  backed  tranquilly  out  of  the 
room  with  it,  still  unperceived.  He  gained  the  open  air.  The 
captain  was  waiting  for  him  at  the  corner  of  the  street. 

"  Got  it  ?"  he  asked,  carelessly.    . 
18 


410  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Eh  r  said  Alfred. 

"  Your  handkerchief?" 

Alfred  had  forgotten  his  handkerchief  altogether ;  he 
stared  a  little,  and  then  said, hurriedly,  "Oh,  yes,"  and  was 
in  a  semi-somnambulist  state ;  and  feeling  an  intolerable 
desire  to  be  alone  for  a  little,  he  informed  the  captain  that 
he  must  go  and  call  to  see  his  mother.  "  All  right/'  the 
captain  said,  quietly. 

Stupid  Mr.  Alfred  Snigsby  ! — for  the  note  which  caused 
him  such  excitement  was  nothing  but  the  same  note  which 
he  himself  had  brought  from  Athens.  "  She  needn't  have 
kept  it,  though !"  he  thought,  sulkily,  after  looking  at  it. 
"  Perhaps  she  don't  care  for  me,  after  all,"  he  muttered. 
"  Why  the  deuce  was  it  on  the  table  ?"  Oh,  jealousy — thou 
who  art  called  "green-eyed" — thou  art  in  thy  element,  with 
a  green  subject  to  deal  with  1  But  by  this  time  Alfred  was 
at  the  paternal  room. 

He  found  them  very  much  agitated  and  bothered.  Some 
official,  speaking  execrable  English,  had  been  calling,  and 
had  asked  Mrs.  Snigsby  many  qiiestions  about  Blobb :  "  Who 
was  Blobb  ? — Where  did  they  engage  him  ? — What  refer- 
ences had  they  with  him  ?"  What  did  this  portend  ? 

"  I  knew  no  good  was  in  that  abominable  man,"  said  Mrs. 
S.  "I  always  feared  him.  Now,  Alfred,  you  must  ascer- 
tain what  all  this  is  about." 

"  Oh,  by  Jove,  ma — I  can't  undertake  the  bother  !" 

"  What,  sir  !"  roared  old  Snigsby  from  the  sofa,  where 
he  had  been  lying — "what !  why,  what  the  devil  will  you 
do — what  the  devil  have  you  ever  done?  I  have  been 
working  all  my  life — [here  poor  Mrs.  S.  rose  and  ran  out 
of  the  room] — working  all  my  life,  sir,  like  a  horse  ;  and 
you— a  fellow  six  feet — standing  six  feet  in  the  boots  which 
I  pay  for,"  continued  Mr.  S.,  aiming  at  point ;  "you'll  do 
nothing  !  And  you  ain't  ornamental  either  I" 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND  YACHTING.  411 

Alfred  rose  up  in  a  preternatural  calm,  and  whistling 
loudly  from  the  opera,  Gustavus  the  Third,  stalked  majes- 
tically out  of  the  house. 

But  there  was  one  more  interview  to  come  off  for  this  un- 
happy fellow  this  evening.  How  was  he  to  face  the  adora- 
ble Lucy,  having  carried  off  the  letter  which  indeed  the  poor 
girl  had  missed,  and  in  extreme  agitation  had  been  wonder- 
ing where  it  was.  Off  he  must  go  to  the  house,  and  arrange 
that  affair  somehow.  "  I  do  like  her !  She's  a  stunner,'7 
he  muttered  to  himself,  "  and  hang  it,  the  governor  must  do 
something  handsome  when  I'm  married.  He  wants  to  see 
me  settled.  He'll  like  to  see  me  so  respectably  married, 
He's  afraid  of  these  respectable  people.  He'll  come  down 
handsome  !" 

Once  more  he  ascended  the  stairs,  and  there  again  was 
Lucy  by  herself. 

"  Oh,  Lucy  dear,"  began  Mr.  Alfred,  "  I  found  a  letter  of 
yours." 

Lucy  turned  round  quietly.  "  I  did  not  lose  a  letter, 
Alfred,"  she  said,  with  ever  so  little  emphasis  on  the  verb. 

"  Oh,  I  found  it,"  said  Alfred,  hurriedly. 

"  It  was  on  the  table,  I  think,"  Lucy  replied,  with  per- 
fect simplicity.  "  A  letter  from  a  friend  of  my  family,  lying 
on  the  table.  Did  you  take  it  away  ?"  she  asked,  looking 
inquiringly  forth  from  her  charming  gray  eye. 

"  Yes,  I  did,"  said  Alfred,  getting  a  little  sulky.  (Have 
•^n  remarked  how  original  vulgarity  breaks  out  with  most 
effect,  then  ?)  "  It's  from  'Erbert  Flower." 

"  Are  you  quite  sure,"  said  Lucy,  who  felt  her  cheeks 
growing  hot  and  a  little  tremor,  "  that  it  was  a  gentlemanly 
thing  to  do  V 

Now  Mr.  Alfred  dreaded  the  word  "gentlemanly;"  he 
had  morbid  sensibilities  concerning  the  application  of  that 
word. 


412          -       SWELL  LIFE  AT  SEA;    OR, 

"  I  don't  know,  I'm  sure.     I'll  think  of  it,"  he  said. 

"  I  hope  so,"  said  Lucy,  going  fluttering  out  of  the  room 
with  a  motion  like  a  falling  blossom. 

"Oh,  a  general  crisis,"  remarked  Mr.  Alfred  to  himself, 
moodily  ;  but  he  coolly  went  off  for  a  walk,  of  course  get- 
ting a  cigar. 

Well,  it  was  now  the  evening  of  September  15th,  184-, 
as  I  remember  minutely  ;  for  the  subsequent  adventures  of 
that  night  were  singular,  and  often  the  subject  of  conversa- 
tion in  the  squadron.  -,.t 

It  seems  that  Alfred  went  wandering  about  the  least-fre- 
quented parts  of  the  town,  and  it  is  conjectured  (Jigger,  of 
the  Bustard,  swears  to  it)  that  he  refreshed  himself  more 
than  once  at  cafes.  Zarb,  of  Strada  St.  Giovanni  (who,  by 
the  by,  would  like  Jigger's  address,  if  convenient!)  heard 
him  singing  as  he  passed  his  shop  ;  and  then  it  was  noticed 
that  a  suspicious-looking  fellow  was  following  him.  Near 
the  marina,  at  all  events  about  twelve,  it  would  seem  that 
Alfred  was  seized  from  behind,  and  carried  on  board  the 
Paragon. 

"When  I  awoke,"  said  Alfred,  at  the  C.  C,,  afterwards, 
"  I  heard  a  strange  gurgling  noise,  and  found  myself  in  a 
very  narrow  place.  By  Jove,  Sir !  I  was  on  board  our 
yacht :  [look  of  admiration  from  Buck,  the  ruffish  actor  :] 
and  that  fellow,  Blobb,  had  carried  me  off  to  sea !  They 
were  going  to  have  him  up  for  bigamy,  it  seems  ;  his  Eng- 
lish wife  had  come  out  to  Malta.  And,  by  Jove  I  he 
wanted  to  be  off  cheap  :  so  he  made  up  his  mind  to  go  to 
Sicily — and  he  made  me  go,  or  they'd  have  seized  him  for 
stealing  the  yacht,  Gad!  I  was  obliged  to  do  what  he 
pleased  ;  and  glad  I  was  to  get  rid  of  him  at  Naples,  for  he 
went  there." 

The  reader  must  fancy  the  astonishment  of  all  parties 
concerned  next  morning.  Nothing  was  heard  of  the  yacht 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  413 

for  ten  days.  Lucy  Beddoes  was  in  great  terror,  poor  thing, 
and  Herbert  Flower  (as  an  old  friend  of  the  family)  was 
constantly  at  their  house.  At  last,  news  came  that  the 
yacht  was  at  Naples,  and  Alfred  at  the  Yictoria  waiting  for 
supplies  from  Mr.  Snigsby.  It  was  remarked,  that  his  let- 
ters to  Lucy  were  very  cool.  But  one  never  knows  the 
truth  of  these  breaking-off  cases.  An  "  attachment,"  as  a 
fanciful  friend  remarks,  when  it  does  break,  smashes  into  so 
many  bits,  that  you  can  never  put  them  together,  so  as  to 
get  a  notion  of  how  it  looked  when  it  was  whole  ! 

At  all  events,  the  "attachment"  did  break  off.  Mrs. 
Cockatoo  asserts,  that  Herbert  Flower,  one  evening,  kissed 
Lucy  Beddoes,  without  being  required  to  apologize  ;  and 
Mrs.  Flower,  wife  of  the  present  Herbert  Flower,  Esq.,  of 
Flory,  is  a  very  pretty  gray-eyed  woman — and  the  only  one 
of  the  "  county  people  "  who  is  properly  civil  to  Lady  Gruf- 
fin  Ribs,  as  the  excellent  Sir  G.  R.  assured  my  friend  Fon- 
tenoy. 

It  was  from  Fontenoy  that  I  heard  the  whole  history,  at 
the  hospitable  house  of  his  brother-in-law,  Alfred  Welwyn, 
R.  N.  The  Snigsbys  are  highly  prosperous,  and  Alfred 
much  improved  since  his  father  compelled  him  to  work. 
Herbert  Flower  is  extremely  improved,  likewise. 

"  There  is  always  a  chance  for  a  gentleman/7  said  my 
friend  F.,  philosophically,  "if -he  has  an  atom  of  sentiment 
in  him.  Much  thumping  is  required  to  bring  a  disciple  of 
the  SIMIOUS  SCHOOL  into  good  order  though." 


THE  DEATH  SHOT: 

A  TALE  OF  THE  COAST  GUARD. 


TTTERE  a  man  to  go  to  Jericho,  the  reason  for  such  a  jour- 
YV  ney  would  be  sufficiently  palpable  ;  but  did  he  cross  the 
Irish  Channel,  who  is  there  who  would  not  exclaim,  ''What 
on  earth  could  induce  him  ?"  nor  would  the  beauty  of  the 
lakes,  the  picturesque  sites  of  Wicklow,  or  the  sublimity  of 
the  Giant's  Causeway,  arise  in  the  mind  as  a  ready  solution. 
Say  Paris,  Rome,  Naples,  Yenice,  Vienna,  Florence,  Lau- 
sanne, and  all  their  multifarious  attractions  at  once  crowd 
on  the  imagination,  and  readily  account  for  the  migration 
of  the  most  indolent  gossiper  who  ever  lounged  in  the  bay- 
window  of  White's.  I  sin,  therefore,  with  my  eyes  open,  in 
not  setting  forth  an  elaborate  expose  of  the  causes  which 
moved  me  to  visit 

"  The  first  flower  of  the  ocean  and  gem  of  the  sea ;" 

but  whatever  I  may  purpose  hereafter,  it  happens  not  to 
enter  into  my  present  plan  to  communicate  more  than  that 
I  not  only  found  myself  in  Ireland,  but  in  as  black,  bleak, 
rugged,  rocky,  mountainous  a  spot  as  ever  an  Italian  bandit 
sought,  or  Messrs.  Grieve  &  Co.  delighted  a  London  audi- 
ence with. 

From  the  turf-fire  of  the  room  in  which  I  was  located  at 
the  village  inn,  a  sufficient  quantum  of  smoke  intermingled 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  415 

with  the  atmosphere  to  give  it  that  peculiar  high-dried  odor 
so  agreeable  to  the  olfactory  nerves  of  the  Milesian.  I  will 
not  deny  that,  on  the  crazy  bed  which  stood  in  a  corner  of 
the  room,  I  had  often  slept  soundly  enough — still  it  offered 
no  temptation,  and,  like  the  good  sauce  of  hunger,  which 
makes  the  toughest  steak  delectable,  you  must  be  tho- 
roughly knocked  up  before  you  sought  the  luxury  of  such 
repose  as  it  offered.  To  be  sure,  two  thirds  of  a  bottle  of 
whiskey  on  the  table,  and  a  steaming  toddy-kettle  on  the 
fire,  would  have  given  a  very  comfortable  sort  of  night-cap 
to  any  one  who  cared  not  to  awake  feverish  in  the  morning. 

From  the  windows,  however,  a  far  different  scene  pre- 
sented itself:  the  sky  was  cloudless,  the  moon  in  the  full, 
and  every  ray  reflected  by  a  boundless  ocean-mirror — not  a 
zephyr  ruffling  its  glassy  surface,  save  at  its  margin,  where 
the  ebbing  tide  receded  from  a  blanched  and  almost  impal- 
pable sand. 

It  was  the  witching  time  of  night.  I  raised  the  latch, 
and  incontinently  strode  forth.  Howard's  picture  of  fairies 
disporting  by  moonlight  rose  on  my  imagination,  and  I 
looked  wistfully  for  those  light,  tiny,  aerial  beings  he  loved 
to  depict.  The  only  living  object,  however,  which  revelled 
in  the  moonbeams  and  moved  along  the  sands,  was,  though 
picturesque  enough,  as  diametrically  opposite  to  light,  tiny, 
aerial  beings,  as  a  tall,  square-shouldered,  stalwart,  heavy- 
bearded  man  could  be — especially  when,  instead  of  butterfly 
wings  and  Arachne-wove  gossamer  robes,  he  was  accoutred 
in  a  glazed  norVester,  a  tarpaulin  cloak  and  leggings,  bore 
in  his  hand  a  formidable  bludgeon,  and  belted  round  his 
waist  were  pistols,  sword,  ammunition,  and  port-fire ;  in 
place  of  fantastic  gambols,  his  gait  was  slow  and  measured  ; 
in  lieu  of  quirks  and  wiles,  and  wreathed  smiles,  he  cast 
around  cautious,  scrutinizing  glances.  His  was  no  merry 
sabaoth,  but  the  lonely,  dreary  watch. 


416  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

I  addressed  to  one  so  described,  some  observations  on 
the  beauty  of  the  night,  fell  into  his  step,  and  we  proceeded 
together.  The  sands,  baying  with  a  bold  sweep,  were  ter- 
minated by  a  precipitous  ridge  of  black  rocks  running  out 
far  into  the  sea.  Among  these  huge,  black,  chaotic  frag- 
ments, a  narrow,  slippery  and  dangerous  path  was  marked 
by  white  stones,  a  few  feet  apart  on  either  side.  Notwith- 
standing the  brightness  of  the  moon,  it  required  all  my  at- 
tention, as  we  rounded  the  rugged,  frowning  point,  lest  by 
a  false  step  I  should  be  precipitated  some  thirty  feet  on  the 
bristling  bed  of  rocks  that  ranged  beneath  us.  Over  head 
hung  a  heavy  mass,  that  occasionally  left  the  path  in  the 
deepest  shade. 

In  one  of  the  most  difficult  and  intricate  passes  my  guide 
suddenly  started,  stopped,  and  with  an  agitated  voice  and 
manner,  in  a  deep  Connaught  accent,  asked  :  "  Did  you 
hear  that,  sir  ?" 

I  had  heard  nothing  but  the  monotonous  washing  of  the 
waves. 

"  God  rest  his  soul !"  he  continued,  devoutly  crossing  him- 
self. "  Then  it's  a  fearful  thing  to  be  cut  off  unshrived,  and 
no  holy  man  by  to  make  God's  peace  with  you  !" 

"Yet,"  I  observed,  "your  calling  often  puts  you  in  such 
peril !» 

"  Ah  then  !  when  one's  on  duty,  I  take  it  to  be  quite  a 
different  thing.  But  what  I  mean  is,  when  one's  thoughts 
are  upon  life,  and  maybe  about  one's  wife  and  children,  to 
be  suddenly  murdered." 

"  Who  I    How  1    When  did  this  happen  ?" 

"  On  the  very  spot  where  we  stand.  There  !  did  not 
your  honor  hear  that  ringing  shot?  Every  year,  on  the 
night  and  at  the  hour  he  received  the  ball  that  killed  him, 
the  report  of  the  carbine  is  heard.  The  time  was  clean  out 
of  my  head,  or  I  would  not  have  patrolled  this  spot,  at  this 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  417 

hour;  it  always  brings  bad  luck  to  him  that  hears  it,  as 
what  befell  poor  Mike  Blaney,  who  was  on  this  ground  last 
year,  makes  certain." 

There  was  in  the  manner  of  the  sailor  such  a  solemn  con- 
viction of  what  he  said,  that  whatever  might  have  been  my 
own  incredulity,  I  forbore  making  more  expression  of  it 
than  uttering — 

"  It's  strange  1" 

"  Then  indeed,"  he  replied,  "it  is  strange.  Many  of  us 
have  heard  it — and  I  was  talking  to  your  honor,  and  not  a 
bit  thinking  about  the  spot  or  time,  when  the  report  came, 
sharp  as  though  you  had  discharged  a  piece  close  under  my 
ear  ;  and,  what  is  not  less  strange,  on  the  night  of  the  mur- 
der, his  wife — poor  thing — was  just  getting  into  bed,  when 
the  report  of  a  musket,  as  exploded  hard  by,  made  her 
scream  to  the  servants  to  know  what  had  happened  ;  and 
as  they  ran  to  inquire,  they  met  the  men  on  watch  coming 
to  the  house  to  know  the  cause,  Nor  could  it  be  made  out, 
until  the  poor  officer  was  picked  up  and  carried  stone  dead, 
and  cold,  into  the  house — though  your  honor  sees  it  was 
clean  impossible  for  the  report  of  a  carbine  to  be  heard  from 
this  to  the  house.  Nor  did  the  men  on  watch,  at  either  of. 
the  next  guards,  hear  a  breath  of  noise  that  night." 

Whether  that  emotions  springing  from  mystery  are  infec- 
tious, or  that  there  is  a  latent  tendency  to  superstition,  never 
so  thoroughly  eradicated  as  we  are  prone  to  believe,  the 
perfect  credence  the  sailor  had  in  these  preternatural  omens 
affected  me.  The  hour,  the  scene,  the  dreary  spot,  all  lent 
aid  to  the  interest  I  felt  to  know  the  circumstances  that 
gave  rise  to  these  wondrous  anniversary  mementoes  of  a 
deed  of  blood  and  crime. 

"Neal  Brian t,  your  honor,  was  a  regular  man-o'-war's 
man,  and  what's  more  rare — before  father  Mathew  intro- 
duced the  pledge — was  very  sober.  He  returned  with  a 
18* 


418  SWELL  LIFE   AT   SEA;    OB, 

good  sum  of  prize-money,  obtained  leave  of  absence,  got 
spliced  to  a  comely  young  woman,  with  a  neat  little  fortune 
of  a  hundred  or  so  ;  and  as  they  loved  each  other,  and  soon 
had  children  enough,  it  was  natural  that  they  should  like 
living  together  better  than  being  separated  for  months  or 
years  from  each  other.  He  got,  therefore,  turned  over  to 
the  coast  guard.  He  bought  a  fishing-boat  or  two,  and  as 
Boon  as  his  boys  could  handle  a  tiller,  or  trim  a  sail,  they 
became  expert  fishermen,  and  added  to  the  family  stock. 

"  Neal  Briant,  as  well  as  being  a  handsome,  smart  fellow, 
could  read  and  write  well ;  so  that  it  was  no  wonder  that 
in  a  few  years  he  became  a  commissioned,  and  then  a  chief- 
boatman.  His  sons,  in  the  mean  time,  had  become  strap- 
ping, clever  fellows,  and  thorough  seamen.  Not  a  pilot  knew 
the  coast  better  than  Willy  and  Jemmy  Briant.  They  were 
dare-devils,  too.  The  one  went  mate  some  time  to  a  West 
Indiaman  ;  the  other  was  master  and  part  owner  of  a  coast- 
ing vessel,  running  with  general  freight. 

"  Times  weren't  then  as  they  are  now,  sir.  There  was 
plenty  of  money  afloat.  Gentlemen — and,  indeed,  all  other 
classes  of  people — drank  hard.  Duties  were  high  ;  home- 
made adulterations  were  not  invented.  The  genuine  for- 
eign article  must  be  had  at  any  price,  and  at  all  risks. 
It  was  a  glorious  time  for  smugglers,  and  for  the  coast 
guard  too,  as  far  as  that  went.  It  was  desperate  work,  it 
is  true,  but  the  rewards  on  both  sides  were  great.  A  good 
run  or  two  was  a  fortune  to  a  man  ;  and  it  was  a  bad  win- 
ter for  a  coast  guard's  man  if  he  did  not  share  some  hun- 
dreds prize-money.  I  say  winter,  for  in  the  short,  light 
nights  of  summer  the  risk  to  the  smugglers  was  too  great  ; 
not  that  they  stood  at  trifles,  or  cared  to  sink  the  craft  if 
they  ran  the  cargo. 

"  An  able,  resolute  young  sailor,  especially  if  he  knew  the 
coast  well,  need  not  beg  for  service,  then.  He  had  his  own 


FUN,   FRIGATES,   AND   YACHTING.  419 

terms,  and  all  sorts  of  temptations  were  held  out  to  him  ; 
and  if  we  were  not  tried,  more's  the  pity.  Some  of  our 
men  made  a  thousand  or  two,  though  how  it  was  made, 
divil  a  soul  could  say. 

"  As  you  came  down  by  the  Lough,  off  to  the  right,  you 
may  have  remarked,  sir,  a  high,  white  house ;  it  is  nigh 
ruinated  now  ;  only  a  bit  inhabited.  The  window-frames 
are  shattered,  the  door  planked  up — all  is  desertion.  Well, 
there  was  some  good  doings  in  that  house,  and  many  a 
jovial  night — whiskey  galore,  and  the  reek  of  the  kitchen 
could  be  winded  a  mile  round.  A  hard-featured,  grizzled- 
headed  old  fellow  lived  there — one  Captain  M'Sweeny. 
He  was  a  cute  old  fox,  with  glimmering  eyes  half  shut, 
and  a  kind  of  grinning  mouth  half  open,  except  when  he 
listened,  and  then  it  was  wedged  together,  as  if  he  feared 
the  breath  would  escape  him. 

"  He  was  born  a  fisher-boy,  and  glad  of  a  'tato  paring, 
or  the  skin  of  a  herring.  But  he  built  this  house,  had  a 
good  holding  of  land,  and  none  know  what  money.  But 
he  is  off  to  America,  years  ago  ;  God  knows  if  dead  or 
alive  now  ! 

"  More  than  by  the  guards,  revenue  cruisers,  and  customs- 
officers,  the  smugglers  were  ruined  by  splits  among  them- 
selves. Many  hands  must  be  employed,  principals,  agents, 
crews,  sea  pilots,  land  pilots  ;  and  it  was  a  great  difficulty 
to  find  men  true  and  silent,  who  never  babbled  over  their 
liquor,  and  could  withstand  the  bribery  and  protection 
government  offered  for  informers  ;  besides,  with  temptation 
without,  envy,  jealousy,  hatred,  revenge  rankled  within. 

"  Now  here  it  was  that  M'Sweeny  went  beyond  all  men  ; 
he  was  known  to  be  colleagued  with  the  smugglers  in  two- 
thirds  of  the  ports  of  Europe  ;  he  shrunk  from  no  adventure, 
however  desperate  ;  yet  so  cute,  wary,  and  cautious  was  he, 
so  hedged  and  fenced,  that  never  once  was  he  implicated, 


420  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

much  less  anything  brought  home  against  him.  The  devil's 
cure  to  him  !  One  thing  was,  he  trusted  as  far  as  possible  no 
one — till  the  last  minute,  he  kept  everything  dark  ;  and 
those  few  in  whom  at  last  he  must  trust,  he  proved  his  keen- 
ness and  craft, by  the  choice  of,  and  endeavored  to  bind  to 
him,  body,  and  soul,  and  estate.  Well,  sir,  the  lads — bad 
luck  to  him  ! — his  treacherous  old  eyes  soon  fell  on  were 
Willy  and  Jemmy  Brian t  ;  and  didn't  that  prove  the  daring, 
as  well  as  the  craft  of  the  old  rogue  ?  for  while  the  lads 
were  clever,  fearless,  and  faithful,  warn't  they  the  sons  of  the 
most  dauntless,  intelligent,  active  man  in  the  customs  ser- 
vice, the  most  inveterate  enemy  to  the  smugglers,  one  they 
most  dreaded,  and  knew  incorruptible  ? 

"  Maybe  M'S  weeny  might  not  have  been  an  ill-looking 
fellow  when  young,  for  time  changes  all,  especially  one  sub- 
ject to  weather  and  watches,  but,  above  all,  suspicion  ; 
evil  doings — bad  passions — cause  deep  furrows  and  dark 
lines. 

"  Kate  M'S  weeny,  too,  his  wife,  was  a  stout,  well-built, 
brave  girl  enough,  and  a  good  wife  to  him,  one  that  did  as  he 
bade  her,  and  never  had  eyes  to  see  further  than  he  wished, 
or  ears  to  hear  one  bit  more  than  he  desired,  with  a  ready 
hand  and  nimble  foot  whe  i  requisite.  Not  but  one  often 
sees  a  cross-grained  couple  with  buxom  children,  but  God's 
truth  is,  a  prettier  girl  than  Kathleen  M'Sweeny  mortal 
eyes  never  looked  on  ;  she  had  large,  loving,  soft,  blue  eyes, 
swimming  amidst  long  dark  lashes  ;  her  light  hair  fell  wav- 
ing and  curling  in  light  golden  ringlets  ;  her  little  rosebud 
mouth  showed  rows  of  pearls.  She  was  a  lily,  a  snow-drop, 
with  a  sweet  tinge  of  carnation  grafted  on  her  cheeks  She 
was  tall  and  slight  built,  but  each  year  added  fresh  beauties 
to  her  form. 

"  If  old  M'S  weeny  loved  anything  as  money,  it  was  Kath- 
leen. You  may  depend  she  had  suitors  enough  ;  how  any 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  421 

pleased  the  girl  it  was  difficult  to  say,  for  the  heart  of  a 
young  girl  is  a  riddle  that  has  perplexed  many  a  wise  head  ; 
however,  none  received  encouragement  from  M'Sweeny  ; 
not  that  he  turned  the  door  on  them,  but  now  with  a  good 
word,  uow  with  a  bad  word,  just  kept  them  dangling  on. 
So  that,  with  his  money,  his  cunning,  and  the  beauty  of 
Kathleen,  there  was  not  a  young  fellow  he  had  not  some 
hold  of,  and  whose  heart  did  not  jump  with  joy  when  he  bade 
them  welcome,  and  Kathleen  smiled.  Then,  among  all 
these  young  fellows,  there  was  none  more  tantalized  than 
Willy  Briant.  Poor  lad,  one  day  he  looked  as  though  he 
would  throw  himself  into  the  sea  ;  on  another  he  was  as 
joyous  as  the  sunbeams  dancing  on  it. 

"  Perhaps  this  was  a  courtship  Briant  himself  might  not 
altogether  have  approved  of,  but  like  all  other  things  in 
this  world,  there  was  much  to  be  said  on  both  sides,  and 
whatever  one  might  think  of  old  M'Sweeny,  devil  a  word 
could  be  said  in  disparagement  of  Kathleen.  If  she  were 
a  bit  of  a  coquette,  as  all  the  sex,  and  liked  to  be  admired, 
there  was  something  so  coy,  wild,  and  roguish  about  her, 
that  not  one  of  the  lads  could  ever  boast  he  had  pressed  her 
hand,  or  breathed  five  words  of  love  together  in  her  ear. 
Indeed  the  night  work  we  have  and  other  duties  prevented 
Briant  knowing  much  about  the  matter,  and  as  Mrs.  Briant 
would  have  liked  well  enough  that  Willy  should  have  such 
a  load  of  money  as  M'Sweeny,  and  such  a  wife  as  Kathleen, 
many  a  time  at  dinner  she  would  say  he  was  out  laying  his 
lobster  pots  in  the  Lough,  when  he  was  but  just  dangling 
about  to  catch  a  glimpse  of  Kathleen.  Then,  she  was  just 
like  the  rest  of  the  world — mighty  forgiving  how  a  man 
made  his  money,  provided  he  had  plenty,  and  gold  was 
never  the  worse  in  the  children's  hands,  however  the  father 
might  have  come  by  it. 

"  The  old  fox's  eyes  glimmered  as  he  saw  his  victim  flut- 


422  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

ter  about  the  money-jar;  he  gradually  softened  into  pretended 
confidence,  asked  Willy's  advice  and  opinion  upon  sundry 
little  nautical  matters,  and  whatever  might  have  been  his 
ultimate  views  and  ambition  for  Kathleen,  filled  Willy's 
heart  and  head  with  a  thousand  hopes  built  on  those  vague 
nothings,  which  to  the  young  and  sanguine  are  solid  as  the 
rocks  we  tread  on. 

"The  vessel  Willy  had  been  mate  of  being  in  dock, 
M'Sweeny  offered  him  his  interest  to  get  him  appointed 
master  of  a  large  schooner  trading  to  Flushing  and  other 
parts.  This  Willy  leapt  at,  and  Jemmy,  who  loved  his  bro- 
ther, and  believed  he  would  ultimately  win  Kathleen,  was 
induced  to  sell  his  share  of  the  coaster,  and  embark  as  chief 
mate  of  the  Atalanta. 

"At  first  the  trading  seems  regular,  all  above  board, 
though  there  may  be  concealments  for  contraband  goods, 
of  which  neither  master  nor  mate  knows  anything.  The  lads 
once  in  the  hands  of  those  daring  desperate  gangs,  are  by 
degrees  worked  on,  and  led  astray.  First  it  might  be  but 
some  lace  for  Kathleen,  or  a  keg  of  brandy  or  a  tub  of 
bacca  for  M'Sweeny.  Then  without  the  young  hands  well 
knowing  what  they  are  about,  they  implicate  them  in  some 
larger  transactions,  till  what  by  example,  what  by  love  of 
adventure,  cupidity,  the  impossibility  of  escape,  all  their 
good  principles  are  debauched,  they  become  bound  soul  and 
body  in  the  perilous,  but  profitable  traffic. 

"  Oh  !  the  old  sinners  know  well  enough  how  to  work 
round  a  spirited  young  fellow,  and  so  the  two  lads,  though 
as  yet  with  characters  untainted  by  suspicion,  and  being 
looked  on  as  thriving,  honest  young  fellows,  became  fore- 
most in  carrying  on  old  M'Sweeney's  nefarious  plans. 

"Then  he  was  a  real  gentleman,  a  great  scholar,  and 
a  good  officer;  there  was  something  proud  and  haughty 
in  his  manner,  yet  he  was  the  civilest  man  to  speak  to,  I 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND   YACHTING.  423 

ever  knew — the  devil  an  oath  ever  came  out  of  his  lips. 
He  was  one  Lieutenant  Gascoine,  and  a  smart  seaman, 
strict  and  fond  of  discipline,  and  liking  to  see  the  duty  done 
as  it  should  be,  yet  he  would  spare  any  one  else  sooner  than 
himself.  He  was  never  prying  or  bothering  his  men,  now 
with  this,  now  with  that.  He  had  been  married  to  a  pretty 
young  woman,  just  long  enough  to  have  a  little  boy,  who 
was  the  darling  of  both. 

"  In  this  service  there  are  continual  dispatches,  because, 
do  you  see,  we  are  a  splice  of  all  things,  sailors,  soldiers, 
police  customs,  conservators  of  the  fisheries,  quarantine  offi- 
cers, just  something  of  everything,  without  being  much  of 
anything.  Well,  sir,  as  became  known  at  the  court-martial, 
one  night  the  officer  received  a  confidential  dispatch  from 
Flushing.  It  described  the  Atalanta  by  name,  build  and 
rig ;  the  strongest  suspicions  were  entertained  that  she  be- 
longed to  wealthy  adventurers,  and  was  about  to  attempt 
a  large  run.  The  letter  went  on  to  say  that  the  master 
and  mate  were  supposed  to  be  the  sons  of  some  chief-boat- 
man of  the  coast  guard.  The  officers  were  enjoined  to  keep 
a  strict  look-out  for  this  vessel,  secretly  to  inform  them- 
selves of  the  employment  of  the  men's  sons,  and  to  report 
thereon,  with  such  intelligence  as  they  could  collect  respect- 
ing the  Atalanta. 

"  Soon  Lieutenant  Gascoine  learnt  that  it  was  Willy  and 
Jemmy,  the  sons  of  Briant,  who  were  the  master  and  mate 
of  the  Atalanta.  The  lads  were  constantly  writing  home 
to  their  mother  and  sisters  to  have  news  of  Kathleen,  and 
of  themselves,  so  that  the  whereabouts  of  the  Atalanta, 
probable  time  of  her  sailing,  where  it  was  likely  she  would 
touch,  where  bound,  when  to  return,  were  continually  known 
to  our  officer,  and  reported ;  and  thus  every  precaution 
taken  for  her  capture  in  due  time. 

"  Thus  the  affection  of  the  boys  for  their  parents  betrayed 


424  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

their  employers,  and  the  garrulity  of  the  fond  mother,  and 
the  pride  of  old  Briant  in  his  sons,  betrayed  the  children. 

"The  sun  was  setting  heavily  among  the  gathering  black 
clouds,  when  the  man  on  duty  reported  that  an  unknown 
schooner  was  working  in  the  offing :  the  officer  took  his 
glass  and  examined  her  movements.  We  were  all  standing 
by,  when  Briant  taking  up  the  glass  from  the  man  on  watch, 
after  an  instant's  sight  of  her,  exclaimed  joyfully — 'She's 
the  Atalanta,  she's  the  Atalanta.' 

"  The  officer  turned  on  his  heel  without  a  word,  and  in  a 
few  minutes  expresses  were  sent  off  to  the  commander  of  the 
district,  and  to  the  officers  commanding  our  flanks  right  and 
left.  Not  long  after  that,  Paddy  Sullivan,  a  fisherman, 
who  has  a  hui  and  a  '  tato'  field  down  by  the  bourne, 
wanted  to  have  a  speech  with  the  Lieutenant. 

"  Now,  whether  it  was  Paddy  Sullivan  or  not,  God 
knows  !  only  Paddy  was  known  to  change  a  ten-pound  note 
not  long  after  in  the  purchase  of  a  cow,  and  he  added  a  bit 
more  to  his  potato  garden  ;  however  that  may  be,  it  seems 
that  Mr.  Gascoine  got  intelligence  that  Mike  Magee,  who 
had  been  absent  some  months,  suddenly  returned. 

"  Now,  your  honor  must  know,  Mike  had  the  reputation 
of  being  one  of  the  cutest  land-pilots  of  these  parts — and  as 
you  may  have  heard  more  of  sea-pilots  than  of  land-pilots, 
I'll  just  tell  you  the  nature  of  their  business,  which  is  this : 
when  the  run  has  been  made,  they  direct  the  route,  and  the 
way  in  which  it  shall  be  passed  up  the  country  ;  and  there 
is  not  a  cave  or  hole,  or  rabbit  burrow,  nor  a  crag,  nor  a 
glen,  nor  a  pass,  that  they  are  not  acquainted  with  better 
than  your  honor  may  be  with  the  high  road.  There  is  not 
a  hare  that  could  double  like  Mike,  nor  a  fox  more  cunning 
to  cut  off  the  scent  when  pursued. 

"There  is  one  Mclvoy,  a  well-to-do  man,  that  holds  a 
large  farm  convenient  to  the  sea.  Now,  all  the  world 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          425 

knows  that  Mclvoy  is  not  over  nice  how  he  comes  by  a  bit 
of  money,  so  long  as  he  can  but  grab  it.  Well,  he  has  a 
few  sheds  and  out-houses  that  are  washed  by  the  sea  at 
high  tide,  and  since  Mike's  return,  he  had  been  employed 
in  making  repairs,  though  not  a  rail  had  been  driven  in  be- 
fore, this  many  a  day. 

"Now,  I  have  been  out  on  many  a  dark  night,  but  one 
so  black  as  that,  in  my  life  I  never  knew — not  the  twinkle 
of  a  star ;  the  sky  was  like  a  tarpaulin.  I  had  patrolled 
here,  then,  ten  to  fifteen  years,  but  not  a  step  could  I  take 
till  I  got  a  glimpse  of  one  of  our  marks  to  direct  me. 
Well,  sir,  our  officer  having  as  usual  examined  all  our  arms, 
sent  us  out  to  the  different  guards,  but  between  twelve  and 
one,  when  he  came  out  to  visit  the  guards,  instead  of  ex- 
changing us,  he  brought  us  in  with  him. 

"  We  all  thought  that  since  all  was  so  quiet,  and  it  was 
impossible  to  see  a  yard  before  one,  it  might  be  to  dismiss 
us  to  bed. 

"Lieutenant  Gascoine  marched  us  beyond  Mclvoy's, 
then  whistled  in  the  patrols  at  the  extreme  south.  He 
called  Briant,  and  Bob  Smith,  a  commissioned  boatman, 
aside,  and  gave  orders  to  Briant  to  take  three  men,  and 
moving  among  the  rocks  to  the  water's  edge,  to  lie  in  am- 
bush close  to  Mclvoy's  sheds ;  while  Bob  Smith  was  to 
take  a  file,  go  round  by  the  north,  and  do  the  same.  They 
were  to  be  silent  as  death,  and  not  to  move  should  any  one 
approach,  till  a  landing  had  been  effected,  when  they  were 
to  rush  out  and  secure  the  men. 

"Mr.  Gascoine  and  the  rest  moved  down  on  the  centre. 
We  were  to  conceal  ourselves  standing,  squatting,  or  lying 
down,  as  best  we  might — but  as  I  told  you,  it  was  pitch 
dark,  so  that  was  not  a  matter  of  much  difficulty. 

"  We  laid  there,  may  be  half  an  hour,  not  the  whistle  of 
a  curlew  to  break  the  silence.  Some  fell  asleep,  and  all 


426  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

wondered  what  we  were  doing  there,  for  as  I  before  said, 
Gascoine  was  not  a  man  to  have  whims  or  caprices,  as 
some  officers  have. 

"  At  length  our  attention  was  aroused  by  a  slight  splash 
in  the  water,  for  ears  become  wonderfully  acute  by  watch- 
ing, when  all  around  is  silent.  The  leap  of  a  fish  would 
have  more  disturbed  the  sea  ;  at  long  intervals  another,  and 
another,  followed. 

"  We  strained  our  eyes,  but  could  perceive  nothing — we 
somehow  felt^the  approach  of  something,  rather  than  saw 
or  heard  it.  There  was  a  slight  sound — then  a  rush,  and 
the  crossing  of  swords  ;  and  the  low  call  and  whistle  of  par- 
ties— the  deep  struggle — the  shortened  and  panting  breath — 
and  then  the  centre  charged  down. 

"  '  Look  out  to  the  north/  roared  Briant,  '  I  have  grap- 
pled one  villain/  and  striking  his  port-fire,  the  light  glared 
on  his  prisoner,  whom  he  held  by  the  throat.  He  gazed  on 
his  son,  William ! 

"  'Father  I'  exclaimed  William. 

The  port-fire  fell  from  Briant's  hand,  the  prisoner  from  his 
grasp,  but  Bob  Smith,  with  the  butt  end  of  his  carbine, 
felled  him  to  the  ground. 

"'Surrender,  surrender!  or  by  heaven,  I  fire/  called 
out  Gascoine,  holding  a  light  in  one  hand,  a  pistol  in  an- 
other. 

"  The  light  fell  on  a  youth,  who,  with  a  naked  cutlass  in 
his  hand,  seemed  irresolute  to  fight  or  fly.  He  rushed  for- 
ward ;  but  the  ball  from  Gascoine's  pistol  struck  him,  and 
he  rolled  over.  Oh  !  then  it  was  Jemmy  Briant.  The  skir- 
mish went  on,  though  it  was  difficult  to  tell  friend  from  foe. 
Some  of  our  men  ran  into  the  sea  and  shouted,  '  We  have 
got  the  yawl !  they  are  shoving  off  1  lend  a  hand  here,  my 
lads.r  Gascoine  and  some  of  us  leaped  into  the  sea  :  they 
were  desperate  in  the  boat.  I  got  this  lash  on  the  cheek 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.          427 

boarding  her ;  but,  however,  we  got  on  board — some  we 
overpowered  and  manacled,  some  leaped  into  the  sea. 

"  Our  officer  shouted  to  those  on  shore  to  look  out  for 
them. 

"  Daylight  broke.  We  found  two  or  three  kegs  of  brandy 
on  shore,  ten  more  in  the  boat,  and  four  or  five  tubs  of 
tobacco  ;  five  men  we  had  prisoners — two  badly  wounded, 
one  of  whom  was  Jem  Briant. 

"Some  of  us  got  a  hurt  or  two,  but  lost  neither  life  nor 
limb.  From  the  intelligence  Lieut.  Grascoine  had  given,  the 
Atalanta  herself  was  captured  by  the  Eclipse  revenue  crui- 
ser. Well,  sir,  we  shared  a  good  lump  of  prize  money ;  but 
one  would  think  there  was  a  curse  on  it,  for,  somehow  or 
other,  it  seemed  to  bring  misfortune  to  us  all. 

"  It  is  a  remark  I  have  made,  that,  let  a  station  be  ever 
so  happy,  and  officer  and  men  and  men  with  men  ever  so 
well  together,  the  moment  there  is  money  to  divide,  instead 
of  pleasure  it  brings  discord,  envy,  hatred,  bickering,  dis- 
content, and  quarrels.  They  say  the  way  to  gain  an  action 
is,  that  each  man  should  believe  the  victory  depended  on 
him.  This  may  do  in  the  fight,  but  when  the  prize  comes 
to  be  divided,  each  thinks  the  whole  or  largest  share  should 
belong  to  him,  and  that  every  other  division  is  unjust.  Why 

should  Tom  have  that  ?  was  it  not  I  that ?  Oh ! 

there's  no  end  of  the  bragging  and  backbiting.  Well  may 
they  say  money  is  the  root  of  all  evil ;  and  yet  we  are  glad 
to  risk  our  lives  to  get  it. 

"  It  was  an  unlucky  hour  for  the  Briants.  The  prisoners 
were  committed  to  jail.  Jem  Briant  long  suffered  from  his 
wound,  and  they  were  all  transported  for  fourteen  years. 

"  Lieut.  Gascoine  always  appeared  to  have  great  confi- 
dence in  Briant,  nor  do  I  think  would  willingly  do  him 
harm.  But  the  authorities  did  not  like  the  affair  alto- 
gether. 


428  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OR, 

"  Briant  was  tried  by  a  court-martial.  It  was  a  hard 
case  for  him,  after  his  long  service  and  good  conduct.  But 
the  feeling  of  the  court  was  unfavorable,  and  the  evidence 
of  the  lieutenant  and  Smith  as  to  the  release  of  William 
bore  against  him,  so  that  he  was  broke  and  mulcted  of  his 
prize-money,  while  Robert  Smith  was  promoted  to  chief- 
boatman. 

"  From  that  hour  Briant  never  held  up  his  head.  He  and 
his  wife  were  broken-hearted  at  the  fate  of  Willy  and  Jem- 
my, and  his  own  disgrace.  He  became  an  altered  man — 
wan  and  slovenly  in  his  appearance,  and  at  last  took  to 
the  drink — dispirited  when  sober,  and  quarrelsome  when 
half  drunk.  Faith,  he  was  sorely  tried  !  for  his  daughters — 
buxom  girls — it  may  be  they  dressed  too  much,  held  their 
heads  too  high,  and  looked  upon  themselves  as  the  best 
matches  in  these  parts — could  not  bear  their  fall,  and  that 
the  Miss  Smiths  should  take  the  lead  ;  so  one  morning  both 
bolted,  and,  I  have  heard,  took  to  bad  courses — first  in 
Dublin,  then  in  London.  Altogether,  Briant  had  desperate 
fits  of  wrath,  and  looked  on  Lieut.  Gascoine  as  the  ruin  of 
himself,  wife,  and  children.  I  often  tried  to  talk  him  over, 
and  to  show  him  the  officer  only  did  what  was  his  duty,  and 
what  indeed  he  could  not  help  doing.  But  that  only  made 
him  outrageous,  and  with  oaths  he  would  say— 

"  '  Did  he  not  make  a  catspaw  of  me  to  betray  my  own 
boys?  With  his  own  hand  did  he  not  shoot  Jemmy,  and 
command  Black  Bob  Smith  to  fell  the  otner  when  he  had  a 
chance  to  make  away  ?  On  the  trial,  what  color  did  he 
give  to  the  shock  I  felt  when  I  found  I  grasped  my  own 
son  by  the  throat  ?  I  am  no  coward,  or  traitor,  and  have 
always  done  my  duty  like  a  man,  and  fear  nothing.  But 
was  it  not  natural  I  should  feel  amazed  and  woe-struck? 
And  for  this  am  I  to  be  broke — mulcted  even  of  my  miser- 
able prize-money  ?  The  d — d  villains  !  I  should  like  to 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  429 

know  how  they  would  have  acted  1  I  would  pitch  the  ser- 
vice to  the  devil ;  but  at  my  age — now  they  have  had  all 
my  youth  and  best  blood  out  of  me — what  am  I  fit  for  ? 
Was  it  not  enough  to  lose  my  two  boys — to  have  my  poor 
girls'  hearts  turned — to  have  the  poor  old  woman's  heart 
broken  ! — but  that  here  I  am  disgraced  and  degraded,  the 
labor  of  my  life  lost !  Mark  me  I  I  am  d — d,  but  I  will 
be  avenged  yet  1' 

"Now  the  truth  was,  the  officer  pitied  him;  and  often, 
when  his  keen  eyes  must  have  detected  that  Briant  was 
fuddled,  though  it  was  clean  against  his  nature  and  princi- 
ples, he  would  overlook  it,  and  take  opportunity  privately 
to  encourage  Briant,  and  to  warn  him  against  taking  to 
liquor.  But  all  this  only  exasperated  Briant  the  more 
against  him. 

"  Then  Mrs.  Gascoine  herself  would  walk  over  with  her 
little  boy,  and  call  on  Mrs.  Briant,  and  try  to  cheer  her,  for 
the  poor  old  soul  would  sit  weeping  and  wringing  her  hands 
by  the  hour.  It  was  sad  to  look  on  her,  sure  enough  !  and  I 
believe  the  sight  of  Mrs.  Gascoine  and  her  son,  seeing  them 
look  so  blooming  and  happy,  and  Gascoine  and  her  so  doat- 
ing  on  each  other,  only  made  Briant  hate  them  the  more. 

"  Now  it  was  just  such  a  lovely  still  night  as  this,  and 
your  honor  may  have  noticed  a  clear  spring  of  water  that 
jets  from  a  rock,  and  has  worn  itself  a  basin,  into  which  it 
continually  falls,  while  the  rock  whence  it  flows  is  covered 
with  moss,  sea  pinks,  and  a  thousand  tiny  rock  flowers. 
Ah  then  !  that  was  a  favorite  spot  with  Mrs.  Gascoine,  and 
often,  with  the,  wide  ocean  at  their  feet,  she  would  sit  there 
and  work,  while  her  husband  read  to,  or  conversed  with, 
her,  and  the  little  boy  would  be  filling  her  lap  with,  or 
twining  in  her  hair,  all  kinds  of  wild  flowers.  Poor  fel- 
low 1  he  called  it  after  her,  '  Jessie's  Font/  and  it  goes  by 
that  name  to  this  hour. 


430  SWELL   LIFE   AT   SEA;    OK, 

"It  was  anigh  midnight,  and  Gascoine  was  about  to 
visit  the  guards,  when  she  came  out  with  him,  and  they 
seated  themselves  at  the  font,  and  he  clasped  one  of  her 
hands  in  his,  while  with  another  he  was  pointing  out  the 
stars  that  were  in  full  glory,  shining  sweetly  on  them.  Her 
had  thrown  off  his  hat,  and  she  was  without  a  bonnet,  and 
as  their  eyes  were  cast  up  to  heaven,  I  thought  I  never 
looked  on  a  more  beautiful  couple,  for  you  see,  as  the  moon- 
light fell  on  them,  it  was  a  picture.  I  had  that  guard,  and 
as  I  walked  past  them,  I  could  hear  them  converse  on  the 
soul  and  immortality — that  was  the  last  time  I  ever  saw 
him  alive. 

"Then  it  is  an  awful  thing  to  condemn  any  one,  more 
especially  when  the  laws  have  acquitted  him,  seeing  there  is 
no  dependence  on  circumstances,  however  suspicious  they 
may  be. 

"  Neal  Brian t,  the  night  before,  had  been  making  too 
free  with  the  whiskey.  The  officer  sent  him  to  bed,  and  in 
the  morning  spoke  kindly,  but  determined,  to  him.  He 
told  him,  with  almost  tears  in  his  eyes,  that,  however  it 
would  grieve  him,  he  could  never  again  overlook  such  con- 
duct— that  he  must  report  him,  and  that  Briant  well  knew 
the  consequence.  This  seemed  to  touch  Briant  for  the  mo- 
ment. But  his  heart  was  all  changed  and  altered,  and  in- 
stead of  penitence,  he  was  all  vindictiveness.  Gascoine 
passed  along  the  guards,  changing  the  men,  as  is  our 
custom. 

"  Briant  had  the  patrol  we  are  now  on,  which  is  next  to 
the  extreme  south  ;  the  man  who  had  the  guard  below  saw 
then!  walking  together,  that  is,  the  officer  in  advance, 
Briant  following  some  paces  in  the  rear.  Briant  relieved 
Bi&ke  at  the  extreme,  who  came  in  on  this  guard,  but  he 
was  alone,  and  no  mention  was  made  of  the  officer.  Blake 


FUN,  FRIGATES,  AND  YACHTING.  431 

took  the  sands,  but  as  the  tide  was  making,  returned  by  the 
path,  and  just  here,  in  this  dark  nook,  on  the  spot  where  I 
heard  the  report  of  the  carbine,  he  stumbled  over  some- 
thing. He  found  it  was  a  man — he  shook  him — no  reply. 
He  dragged  the  body  to  the  moonlight — to  his  horror  it 
"was  Lieutenant  Gascoine  weltering  in  his  blood,  the  back 
part  of  his  head  blown  off :  he  was  lying  on  his  face,  quite 
dead,  but  still  warm. 

"  Blake  whistled  and  called  ;  he  fired  off  his  pistols,  and 
burnt  his  port-fire.  Smith  and  the  crew  came  rushing  to 
"him ;  they  bore  the  body  to  the  station,  where  they  found 
us  in  consternation,  for  Mrs.  Gascoine  and  all  of  us  had 
heard  the  shot  that  must  have  killed  her  husband  ;  though 
whence  it  came  we  knew  not.  The  suspicion  of  Smith,  then 
in  command,  fell  on  Briant,  but  his  carbine  was  clean  and 
loaded,  and  he  had  his  regular  charges  of  ammunition';  the 
muzzle  of  his  tarpaulin  carbine-case  was,  however,  blown 
off,  but  this  he  proved  to  have  been  done  by  accident  seve- 
ral days  before.  All  he  knew  was,  that  the  lieutenant  had 
sent  him  on,  to  send  in  Blake.  Smith  had  him  taken  be- 
fore the  magistrates,  and  he  was  committed. 

"The  ball  that  killed  the  officer  was  found,  and  sure 
enough  it  was  one  of  the  regular  carbine  balls. 

"Ah,  then  !  it  was  a  house  of  woe,  and  it  would  have 
moved  the  heart  of  a  flint  to  see  Mrs.  Gascoine  and  the 
little  boy  throw  themselves  wailing  on  the  corpse — our 
wives  and  the  fishermen  filled  the  house,  and  there  was  not 
a  dry  eye  among  us,  for  the  bleeding  body  and  the  young 
wife  and  child  looked  piteous,  and  all  loved  Gascoine,  ex- 
cept perhaps  M'Sweeny  and  his  gang. 

"Well,  sir,  Briant  was  tried,  and,  in  spite  of  all,  acquit- 
ted ;  but  in  our  own  minds  he  was  never  clear,  and  when 
he  returned  from  gaol,  we  resolved  not  to  petition  for  his 


432  SWELL  LIFE  AT   SEA,  ETC. 

removal,  and  that  we  would  associate  with  him,  if  he  would 
swear  by  his  holy  Saviour  that  he  was  innocent  of  the  mur- 
der. However  he  might  turn  it,  he  never  would  swear 
direct  that  he  did  not  commit  this  black  deed." 

"Would  a  man,"  I  exclaimed,  "who  had  committed  a 
murder,  hesitate  about  an  oath  ?" 

"  I  know  not,  sir  ;  but  Briant  never  would  swear. 

"  He  was  discharged  from  this,  but  what  became  of  him 
we  never  heard." 


THE     END 


- 


D      '  '  ' '•>  ' 


M208975 


THE  UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  LIBRARY 


,:\CL. 


Ml 


